Cheating: When Love Lies

Does polyamory really make it possible for husbands and wives and committed partners with multiple lovers to have it all? Many say that having an affair makes them feel alive again, but with that exuberance comes deception, duplicity, and deceit. Hiding an affair from your spouse or partner is guilt provoking and burdensome. What if there was a way to maintain the stability of your committed partnership and the passion of your affair. What if you didn't have to choose between a spouse and lover but could have both in an open, honest and loving relationship that includes ...... your children? Is it even possible to have a healthy and open relationship with a spouse (or committed partner) and a lover at the same time? Can you love them both deeply? Can you give both your partner and your lover the attention they deserve, and the intimacy and sexual intensity they need? On this episode I talk with my guests Sarah Levinson, therapist and Dr. Mark Sisti, psychologist talk about polyamory. See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

About 20 years into your marriage, you find out that your husband has been cheating on you with your neighbor. You and he go to therapy to try and fix the marriage. While you're devastated, you remain hopeful because you believe that therapy is going to help your communication, right the wrongs, and ultimately heal the marriage. Fast forward, and you find out the reason he wanted to go to therapy was to break up with you, ask you for a divorce, and leave you and your three children behind. Should you tell your children the truth- can you tell them why daddy is leaving and what he did? Or do you keep your husband's secret and withhold the truth from your kids? Conventional wisdom tells the wife "keep your mouth shut and don't involve your kids." But is that point of view outdated? Why should the betrayed wife suffer in silence and participate in her cheating husband's cover up? Is it right to be evasive with the kids when they start asking questions? What do you think? What would you do? The guest's name has been changed and her voice has been altered to protect her privacy. See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

On this episode called "Dangerous Liaisons: When Cheating Leads to Tragic Ends," powerhouse attorney Marilyn B. Chinitz, a partner at Blank Rome joins me to discuss several of her most shocking cases where infidelity led to: exposing the abuses of a morally depraved mother, unmasking a serial pedophile, and solving a brutal murder. Chinitz shares the stories behind these high profile cases as we explore how infidelity can escalate to unthinkable ends. Chinitz and I discuss the extent of emotional, financial and physical risk involved in any adulterous relationship as cheaters expose themselves, their lives and their families' lives to a secret lover whose true intentions can prove irreparably damaging. See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

Silence is the lethal injection in any relationship. It's more invective and hurtful than a barrage of expletives and a slamming door. In silence, you deny your partner the surety of knowing where you stand and giving them the option to do something about it. I've written a short fictional story called "Answer Me You Son Of A Bitch," that chronicles the agony of a married woman who is ghosted by her married lover for months and months, until one day fate brings a chance for her to win him back. At the start of the episode I narrate "Answer Me You Son Of A Bitch", then follow it up with a roundtable discussion with my guests and friends David, Samantha and John, who react to the story and share their own thoughts on infidelity. See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

Is it possible to be a beautiful, accomplished woman in your 30s, and have never once cheated on a partner - not even a secret emotional flirtation? My guest Joanne Nosuchinsky, co-host of the show "Mornin' with Bill and Joanne" is that woman. Joanne has managed to remain faithful in her relationships even at times when a partner has cheated on her. Conversely, her very good friend and co-host Bill Schulz has slept with "many married women" (his words not mine). I plan on asking Bill how many is many, and why he thinks they all slept with him. Bill says the married women he's been with "don't expect very much." (Umm... what does that mean?) Bill, Joanne and I also play a game that tests their knowledge of modern dating terms and tactics. It's a show filled with LMAO moments, and some pretty surprising revelations from both Bill and Joanne. See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

My guest whom we’ll call Alex, has a a history of philandering. With many indiscretions notched on his belt (I’ll let him tell you just how many) he has a vast experience with stepping outside of his marriage. He’s a nice guy, a religious guy, a hard worker, and a doting father. I wondered why with a seemingly untarnished profile such as his he would cheat on his wife. Alex can’t speak for all people, and he certainly can’t speak for straight women, but we did have a pretty insightful conversation about the many possible reasons why people cheat — and what made him cheat. See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

This week, out of the vault, comes one of my favorite "Cheating: When Love Lies" episodes ever. On this episode, podcast royalty Adam Carolla shares his perspective on cheating and affairs. We talked about emotional versus physical affairs, what drives people to cheat, and the advice he'd give anyone who's thinking of having an affair. In true "Adam style" he uses spot on anecdotes and analogies to explain the complexities of cheating. Adam and I even did a little role play as the unhappy couple trying to decide if we should stay in our relationship or kiss each other goodbye! See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

Is it true that men are so toxic that most end up betraying their partners? Has “toxic masculinity” driven men to cheat openly, often and without regret? Destin Gerek is a globally recognized leading voice in masculinity, sexuality, and personal empowerment. He is founder and CEO of The Evolved Masculine, a pioneering coaching and training company for men, and author of the book "The Evolved Masculine: Be the Man the World Needs, and The One She Craves.” According to Destin, we need a new type of masculinity — the evolved man who is vulnerable and empathetic, and less likely to cheat, hurt and betray. The irony is at one time Destin was the self-proclaimed Erotic Rockstar and had innumerable worldwide sexual conquests. He’ll tell us how he went from that to becoming an evolved masculine. Destin says there are eight rules to live by that lessen the evolved man’s likelihood to cheat. He and I don’t get through all the rules, but we do hit the big ones. Join us ! See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

Women are superior to men. There, I said it! But those aren’t my words, I’m quoting my guest Dr. Ricky Arenson, whose book titled “Women Are Superior To Men” is a witty, tell-it-like-it-is look at how women’s strength, passion, ability to multitask, foresight and emotional intelligence makes us well…superior! But can these attributes help women stave off a potential infidelity or cope more effectively if betrayal is discovered? Dr. Arenson and I talk about: the importance of sex in a marriage, if cheating is a choice or just happens, and if staying together after a betrayal is better than getting divorced. Are women really superior? Let’s find out! See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

What if you're not sexting per se, but sending flirty DMs, texts and pictures to someone you're really attracted to, but your partner has no idea you're doing this? What if after yoga you and a hot hottie in the class go for smoothies, but you don't tell your partner, or admit to yourself that having smoothies with them is the reason you go to yoga in the first place. What if you have full on sex romps with someone other than your partner several times a year without your partner knowing? Are any of or all of these cheating? Are any or all of these relationships?or just hook ups? On this episode, I'll address all of these questions in a short fictional story I've written called "How Many Times A Month Is Enough?" After the reading, I'll host a roundtable discussion with my guests and friends Justin, John, and Amy, who will react to the story and share their own thoughts on infidelity. Jillian Hamilton on the web: https://www.JillianHamilton.online Follow Jillian and Cheating: When Love Lies on Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/cheatingwhenlovelies/ See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

We’re bringing back this popular episode that seeks to answer the question, what are today’s rules of romance? What does monogamy even mean anymore: two spouses committed to each other forever, or two partners committed to each other for life? According to my guest today, both of those paradigms are outdated. My guest contends that people today want to write their own rules about what it means to be married or in a committed long term relationship. Questions like: —Is it ok for my spouse to masturbate to online porn? —Can my partner fantasize about other people while having sex with me? —Should you go from couple to throuple? None of these topics is off limits. In fact, you’re encouraged to discuss it all in open monogamy. Who gets to rewrite the tenets of matrimony as we know it? Who is open monogamy working for - anyone? Someone? Everyone? Let’s find out. See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

You think you’re in a committed relationship. You and your boyfriend are nesting with his daughter and living as a family in what feels like a dream. Then one day your boyfriend is killed in a tragic accident. Overcome with grief, you host his memorial only to find out that several of the women attending are also in a relationship with your boyfriend. This real life tragedy happened to country music sensation, Stephanie Quayle. Now Stephanie is sharing the story in her new album called On The Edge. Join me to hear this deeply emotional story of cheating, grief and betrayal that Stephanie has kept silent for more than 12 years. See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

You have a 16 year affair. You share passionate days and evenings, off-the-charts sex and romantic getaways. You’re madly in love with your affair partner, but you refuse to leave your wife. What if all this seems completely normal to you because as a teenager your father had you lie to your mother in order to cover up his affair and keep his girlfriend a secret. How would that affect your feelings about cheating as an adult? I’m going to ask my guest, because this is exactly what happened to him. See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

Jordan Harbinger, host of "The Jordan Harbinger Show" is one of the biggest names in podcasting and my guest on this episode. He's interviewed some of the greatest minds and celebrities of our time including: Mark Cuban, Ray Dalio, Malcolm Gladwell, T-Pain, and Matthew McConaughey. But on this episode of Cheating: When Love Lies, Jordan is the one answering the questions -lots of them, about infidelity and cheating. Considering his extensive background as a human dynamics expert, internationally acclaimed self-help guru and respected attorney, Jordan is perfectly positioned to answer questions such as: -How to outmaneuver someone who's gaslighting you -How to get the truth out of anyone -What to do when you find out you're being cheated on and lied to -How to get a lover to commit Jordan is witty, smart and super experienced in the relationship space, so not only will you be entertained, but you'll also hear useful relationship strategies and tactics. Whether you're a cheater or betrayed partner, you'll learn from this interview with one of the top names in relationship dynamics and podcasting. See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

Could you be paid to keep your affair silent? Would a big fat check keep you from exposing your affair when your married affair partner goes back to his wife? How much would it take to keep you quiet? See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

My guest Jamie Bronstein is the author of “MAN*ifesting: A Step-by-Step Guide to Attracting the Love That Is Meant for You.” This book will help you create the love life of your dreams. True love without cheating and betrayal. Jamie’s book is so relatable: she shares her very personal stories of how she moved from insecurity and self-doubt, and stepped into her truth and authenticity after suffering failed relationships — and before she finally manifested, the one. But sometimes the road to manifesting takes a detour past infidelity. I asked Jamie “What do you do if the one — the manifested one — cheats on you?” What if you are tempted to cheat on them? Manifesting is all the rage: they say you can attract money, jobs, homes, cars, women and men! But does all this feel good visualizing really work? See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

If ever there was something despicable yet common, rude and dismissive, juvenile and ignorant - it’s ghosting. There was a time when ghosting was hurtful to everyone. You texted or called, but never heard back. It was damaging. But ghosting has become so common that people who once were hurt and offended by it are now pulling those same disappearing acts. But can ghosting ever be good? Maybe in an affair ghosting is the only way out. On this episode I talk with writer, Alexandria Roswick who shares her thoughts on why at times ghosting can be good, preferred or even necessary. See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

It's everyone woman's biggest nightmare. You find out your best friend is having an affair with your husband. In one fell swoop you lose your partner, and the person you believed was your ride or die bestie. You can't believe the betrayal. It seems completely inexplicable, or is it? You may never think this situation is justified, but maybe you can comprehend how it can happen although you won't ever sanction it. Laura (not her real name), my guest to today is a great mom who is killing it in business. She's pretty and smart, someone you could easily imagine being your best friend. Laura was also that affair partner: the woman who had an affair with her best friend's husband. See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

What would you do if you found out your partner was cheating on you? Would you accept it, deny it, or seek revenge? How would you respond if a sexy someone tried to lure you into an affair? Could you resist or would you even want to? What if seeking out conflIct with your spouse could actually strengthen your relationship and save your marriage from infidelity... My guest Jayson Gaddis, renowned relationship coach, founder of The Relationship School, and author of "Getting To Zero: How To Work Though Conflict In Your High Stakes Relationships" says conflict is the key to a deep and meaningful love partnership. So if you want to hear how conflict is a proven way to nurture your relationship or heal after an affair, put your headphones on and get your dukes up !( Figuratively, of course !) See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

Your marriage is in shambles; riddled with stories of cheating, drugs and alcohol. You and your spouse seek out a professional: someone who's going to guide you, and help lead your marriage back to solid ground. There are so many mental health care professionals that are heroes and saviors, but what happens when the therapist you and your spouse rely on betrays you? On this episode of Cheating: When Love Lies, find out why it's critical for every couple to vet their therapist, and find one they can truly trust. See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

On this episode called "Dangerous Liaisons: When Cheating Leads to Tragic Ends," powerhouse attorney Marilyn B. Chinitz, a partner at Blank Rome joins me to discuss several of her most shocking cases where infidelity led to: exposing the abuses of a morally depraved mother, unmasking a serial pedophile, and solving a brutal murder. Chinitz shares the stories behind these high profile cases as we explore how infidelity can escalate to unthinkable ends. Chinitz and I discuss the extent of emotional, financial and physical risk involved in any adulterous relationship as cheaters expose themselves, their lives and their families' lives to a secret lover whose true intentions can prove irreparably damaging. See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

On this episode we talk about fantasy: erotic fantasy worlds that men create in their minds inspired by scrolling social media. It's not about an addiction to porn, it's something else. A whole new world of fantasy that many men are addicted to despite the disastrous impact it has on marriages and partnerships. In my conversation with leading psychologist Dr. Jennifer Guttman we explore a whole new genre of cheating, that prior to social media, just did not exist. See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

Do any of these seem like credible reasons for cheating on someone? (1)You want to cheat first before they cheat on you. (2) Cheating will make them hate you, then leave you, which is great because you don’t want them anymore. (3) Some people aren’t worthy of fidelity, so just go ahead and cheat on ‘em. My guest today is the incredible singer, songwriter, producer and engineer, Killboy. Her vocals are passionate. Her lyrics rip into your soul, and her heart is pure gold. She and I discuss why some people cheat for one or all of those reasons. Join me and Killboy as she shares the cheating traumas from her past, and why she wasn’t always the betrayed, but sometimes she was the cheater. @Killboy. Killboymusic.com See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

We all know this type of guy, the classic philanderer. He's a married, good looking, successful man with swagger. He has a coterie of hot honeys, both married and single women he claims as lovers. His philandering style is so typical it rings like a cliché. Instead of making assumptions about this classic playboy archetype, I wanted to get into his mind. What drives him to pursue, woo, and ultimately sleep with multiple single and married women: all from the same community, his own community, all at the same time? Some of these women are even the wives of men he knows. Why does he act this way? How does it make him feel? What are his sentiments about the women with whom he's cavorting? What if a significant number of married men act this way. It was a disturbing thought, but I asked this episode's guest, a man I'll call Clarke - all this and more. See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

What if you suspected your partner had a secret lover. You could just feel in your gut. Something in your relationship changed, and you're convinced your partner is seeing, or even worse, having sex with someone else. Maybe you start snooping and sniffing around to see what this could-be cheater is up to. You might try to get into their phone and their computer, or do some low-key stalking. But what if this lover was right there in plain sight? Maybe your spouse's secret lover is your best friend, your neighbor, or your cousin. As horrible as that sounds unfortunately it's not sooooo uncommon. What if your spouse moved their lover right into your OWN house? You think it's impossible, then you need to hear my guest today! (My guest's name and voice has been changed to protect her identity) See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

When I was growing up a “hall pass” was the thing you needed in middle school in order to leave class and go to the bathroom. That’s not what a “hall pass” is anymore. Today’s definition is a lot sexier. According to my guest, a “hall pass” let’s you cheat without begin called a cheater. Lets you explore without having to explain. Lets you have sex with someone else without exiting your relationship. It’s time to get schooled on the “hall pass”with my guest relationship coach and top selling author Stacey Herrera. You can find Stacey at: https://twitter.com/StaceyNHerrera https://medium.com/@staceyherrera https://staceyherrera.com See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

On this episode I meet one of the Internet’s most successful and sought after cheating consultants. Yes, a cheating consultant - as in someone who will teach you how to cheat most effectively. Dark Horse, is what he calls himself and his blog https://cheatershandbook.com/ is the go to spot for advice on how to cheat, and how not to get caught. But don’t contact Dark Horse to find out how to have your first affair because he’ll caution you not to start cheating. Then he’ll block your emails to make sure he’s not the one encouraging you to begin having affairs. Dark Horse advises how to cheat successfully, yet counsels not to start cheating in the first place? Seems complicated. So join me as I find out this wildly successful cheating consulting business actually works. See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

Your relative tells you they have proof your spouse is cheating on you, which eliminates all speculation as to whether or not cheating rumors swirling around are true. On this episode we learn how a betrayed wife blamed the messenger for exposing the details of her cheating husband’s escapades. If only the messenger had kept his mouth shut, the marriage could have hummed along as a surreptitiously unfaithful and seemingly happy union: at least that was the wife’s point of view. Was the messenger wrong to tell? Should he have kept his mouth shut? Would you tell? Does the wife blaming the messenger make sense? Join me as we explore the question … do you tell, or don’t you? (Names + places have been changed to protect the guest’s privacy). See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

Is cheating ever justified or perhaps your only way out? This episode's guest, (we'll call her Bethany) suffered for years in a highly toxic home and relationship. It wasn't until Bethany's abusive partner discovered that she was having an affair that Bethany was immediately forced to flee her primary relationship and find solace in her forbidden lover's arms. Is there ever a world in which cheating is not only right, but the only way to right a wrong? See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

Is it love, or an obsession? What is it when you give and give to someone who not only takes and takes, but abuses your kindness then intentionally seeks to hurt you. I rarely use the word narcissist on Cheating: When Love Lies, but the man that my guest Diane (not her real name) fell in love with and helped get a green card, seems to fit the definition of a narcissist to a tee. This person Diane describes is so incredibly mean and cold hearted. What's particularly heartbreaking is how long Diane endured her husband's abuse and neglect. Time after time she trusted him although his lying, cheating ways were not only reprehensible, but at times criminal. See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

Listeners may remember a past episode called “I Am A Christian Conservative Leader Having An Affair.” It was about a young woman who espoused the tenets of her religion, namely fidelity and honesty, despite her having a lesbian affair with her partner who is married to a man. Christine is back because although her affair has now been exposed, Christine’s affair partner is still unable (or unwilling) to leave her marriage and commit to her relationship with Christine. Christine lives in a constant state of flux, as her partner is determined one day then hesitant the next to leave her husband. All this back and forth has made Christine feel insecure and undervalued - like a pawn in her lover’s chess game. Tired of living in a constant state of uncertainty, Christine has come to explore the question: when is it time for the ‘other woman’ to end the affair? See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

If you suspect your partner is cheating, do you seek out tangible proof, or do you just trust your gut feeling? Suppose you trust your gut, but your spouse or partner swears to you, promises you, “there’s nothing going on.” Do you suppress your instincts and convince yourself that covert operations to discover the truth aren’t necessary? My guest today relied first on her gut, and second on her fact-finding skills to try and nab her husband in what she believed were two different affairs. Was she right? Was she wrong? Did her husband lie to her face? Was all that surreptitious snooping worth it? And where did her marriage end up? Join me to find out! See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

My guest today lived his traditional family life and his ultimate affair fantasy. He had the suburban dream of a devoted wife and two small children, but the moment he stepped foot in the cosmopolitan city where he worked, he became a slick, handsome playboy with a stunning, sexy, lover. But slowly he noticed his lover started to change. Her attitudes and behaviors became disturbing. He became afraid of her. My guest talks about his guilt and deep self loathing for having this 16 year affair, and about his quandary: should he leave his affair partner who appeared to be falling apart? This is a guilt ridden, shamed and fragile man. Join me to hear his story. See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

Can being cheated on be the best thing that ever happens to you? Brendan Fitzgibbons, comedian and host of the podcast "Spiritual Asshole," joins me to talk about his transition from needy, codependent, boyfriend to self confident, single guy. With a mix of humor, vulnerability and common sense thinking, Brendan explains how being cheated on took him on a journey that changed his life from sad and directionless to purposeful and full of joy. See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

A 2 minute loyalty test-Yup! Boyfriends and girlfriends can find out in just minutes if their partner is faithful or a cheater. My guest Ayrel, better known as IknowAyrel, has developed a huge following to the tune of 91M likes, 3.9M followers on Tik Tok, and almost 300,00 Instagram followers, by conducting his signature loyalty tests on college campuses and in public venues. On this episode we find out what Ayrel’s loyalty test is, and how he does it. Ayrel and I also discuss what he’s learned about how young people view fidelity in relationships. Finally, we get up close and personal when Ayrel talks about how he views cheating, truth and honesty in his own personal relationships. See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

How many wives would choose to meet their husband’s lover? Would you sit down and have a discussion with your spouse and his lover about their affair? What would you hope learn from that conversation? Perhaps something that could justify, rationalize or at least explain why your spouse cheated on you. This is what happened to my guest (let’s call her Tiffany.) Tiffany confronted her husband, his lover and her husband. But when Tiffany told me how her husband’s young lover described their affair, I thought “Wow — this husband really got duped!” See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

Gaslighting is a term we often hear, but would you know if it was happening to you? Gaslighting is when an abuser manipulates you and tries to create doubt and confusion around something you know to be true. The abuser will deny what they said or did ever happened, which in turn makes you question yourself, your observations, and your sanity. My guest today whom we’ll call Wende, was was gaslighted throughout her nine year relationship, so she never really knew if her partner cheated on her. I have my own point of view on that, but I’ll let you decide what you think was really going on. It will amaze you to learn what Wende’s job is! It reminds me how trusting we can all become when love and lust drives our emotions. See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

Her recent Spectator article called “I Regret My Promiscuity” and the intense social media interest it sparked, reminded me just how provocative writer, comedian, and podcast host Bridget Phetasy truly is. https://spectatorworld.com/topic/regret-casual-sex-promiscuity-slut/ When a woman tells me “Big dicked womanizers were my kyptonite … I loved them” I stop and listen. Only a woman as funny, vulnerable and authentic as my guest Bridget Phetasy could get away with statements like this. On this episode, Bridget shares her personal stories of affairs and heartbreak: “I thought I would be a prisoner of loving him forever…. I’d be a sad mistress who would never love anyone again,” she said. Bridget also describes with unapologetic candor how she weaponized her sexuality to seduce men all over the world. Told by anyone else, Bridget’s stories of love, lust, seduction, and rejection would be utterly dreary. But true to her nature, Bridget finds both humor and heartbreak in her incredible love life journey. Bridget Phetasy is a Spectator columnist and contributing editor. She is also the host of the Weekly Dumpster Fire on YouTube and the Walk-Ins Welcome podcast. See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

You’re married and you’ve been cheated on. You end your marriage because you feel that the trust and integrity of your relationship is gone forever, and you’ve lost all hope that the life you dreamed of - with your spouse by your side- can ever be achieved. You’re devastated, and the demise of your relationship is about to be compounded by shame. Your community is about to shame you and shun you because you chose to divorce your cheating spouse. It seems inconceivable, but it’s exactly what happened to my guest. See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

You’re in a bad relationship. You’ve tried to make it work, but you’re still very unhappy. You’re easily tempted to have an affair with someone who love bombs you: that’s someone who showers you with attention, gifts and promises for the future. This love bomber appears to be in love with you, and you get completely swept up. In some cases you agree to marry, live with, or even have children with your suitor because isn’t this what love is meant to feel like? Um….? Fast forward and you discover it isn’t love, but obsession, and this person who pays so much attention to you turns into your stalker. Or what about when your spouse’s lover stalks you? Now not only do you have to contend with your partner’s cheating, but also having their lover obsess over you and stalk you! On this episode I welcome Jaimie Beebe and Jake Deptula hosts of the hit podcast “Strictly Stalking” to talk about when cheating leads to stalking. See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

It’s still vacation time so this week we’re featuring another one of our favorite episodes “from the vault.” Listeners loved this short fictional story about affairs, and the panel discussion about infidelity that followed. Stay tuned - fresh new episodes of Cheating: When Love Lies are coming soon! What if you’re married but secretly sending DMs and sexy pictures to someone you're attracted to. What if you’re in a long term relationship, but once or twice a year you give yourself permission to have sex with a random person on a business trip. What if you don’t tell your girlfriend that after each yoga class, you and another hot yogi hang out and get smoothies. Are any or all of these cheating? This episode addresses all of these questions in a short fictional story I've written called “Is It Cheating, Or Not Quite?” After reading the story I’ll host my panel of guests: Justin, John, and Amy, who will react to the story and share their own thoughts on infidelity. See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

Summer is here. It’s vacation time — so we are taking some of our fav episodes from the vault while everyone here at “Cheating: When Love Lies” gets some well deserved R+R. This episode features a panel discussion about infidelity. 3 diverse people all comment on a story (based on true life events) about an affair. This crew of panelists is opinionated, raw, diverse, unapologetic and a hell of a lotta fun! The Cheating Story: A husband is suspected of having an affair with not just 1, but 4 different women- simultaneously! After the wife gets a bizarre and suspicious phone call in the middle of the night, this husband and wife question whether it’s time to divulge long held secrets and face serious issues that threaten their marriage. Jillian narrates the story, then follows it up with the panel discussion. See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

Your wife has been sleeping with her assistant. Your partner has been doing the naughty-nasty in the park with the dog walker. Your boyfriend decided to go to his college reunion alone and ran into his ex: the ex he once called the “love of my life.” Uh oh. What if when you find out you’ve been cheated on, you refuse to become the devastated, dejected partner who feels cast aside, and instead you immediately start a new, passionate relationship with someone else. Conventional wisdom says take time for yourself to heal after an affair. But my guest Dr. Jennifer Guttman shares inspiring stories of betrayed spouses and partners who immediately went on to find new love - that flourished! Dr. Jennifer Guttman is a clinical psychologist and motivator specializing in cognitive-behavior therapy featuring the Sustainable Life Satisfaction ® brand. See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

My guest Lishone is a true provocateur. Her forceful criticism of men’s behavior as juvenile and lacking self control has caused an uproar on social media. An opinionated writer, some of Lishone’s recent titles implore women to “Stop Begging Men,” and remind women that “Accountability Is Not Hate.” Lishone’s position on Black men versus Black women is particularly divisive: she declares that Black men “are beneath” Black women, and this is one explanation for why Black men cheat on and mistreat Black women. Lishone is an entrepreneur, marketing executive, author and provocateur. Together she and I will explore the question: “When Women Tolerate Men’s Bad Behavior, Are Men Encouraged To Cheat?” See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

A mature married man who’s been with his wife for 20 odd years decides to go off and have an affair with a hot young 20 or 30- year-old. Nothing newsworthy there. In fact, some more cynical types might say it’s commonplace. But what about a mature married woman in her 40s or 50s having an affair with a married 20 or 30 something? It feels like she’d be tarred and feathered on Twitter. There’s a double standard for women. On this episode we’re going to talk to a mature married woman (we’ll call Lisa) about her torrid affair with her married, much younger, hottie neighbor. Was it all she expected it to be? Lisa is not her real name is and her voice has been altered. See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

For the July 4th holiday, we relaunch one of our most popular episodes. A married woman is tortured by the chaos and ever-changing dynamic of her affair with a married man. The woman's lover claims his wife is mean and neglectful and makes his home life miserable. These two married cheaters have a deeply emotional affair peppered with intimacy and fantasies, yet soured by episodes of his ghosting, lies and manipulation. The story is a journey from the day they meet through the months of passion and disappointment the woman faces until she comes to the realization of what their relationship truly is. This short fictional story called “I Cheat Because My Wife Is Mean & Neglectful” is based on true life events. I begin the episode by reading the story then follow it up with a roundtable discussion with my guests Inna Swinton, comedian, lawyer and author of “The Many Lives of Mila”. Ilyssa Panitz, host of “The Divorce Hour with Ilyssa Panitz” on CRN ; reporter and editor of “5 Things You Need to Know to Survive and Thrive During and After a Divorce,” and Director of Content for the NADP. Also joining us is my friend Blake. My guests will react to the story and share their own thoughts about infidelity. If you have a story you’d like to see featured on the show please send it to:[email protected] See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

About 20 years into your marriage, you find out that your husband has been cheating on you with your neighbor. You and he go to therapy to try and fix the marriage. While you’re devastated, you remain hopeful because you believe that therapy is going to help your communication, right the wrongs, and ultimately heal the marriage. Fast forward, and you find out the reason he wanted to go to therapy was to break up with you, ask you for a divorce, and leave you and your three children behind. Should you tell your children the truth- can you tell them why daddy is leaving and what he did? Or do you keep your husband’s secret and withhold the truth from your kids? Conventional wisdom tells the wife “keep your mouth shut and don’t involve your kids.” But is that point of view outdated? Why should the betrayed wife suffer in silence and participate in her cheating husband’s cover up? Is it right to be evasive with the kids when they start asking questions? What do you think? What would you do? The guest’s name has been changed and her voice has been altered to protect her privacy. See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

You’re a wife. You’re fed up. You’re tired. You’ve talked yourself silly trying to be heard, recognized and appreciated by your husband (or partner). When your husband barely responds or is dismissive, you stop trying to communicate with him, and you start seeing your marriage as unsalvageable. This is when a wife can develop walk away wife syndrome. But does walk away wife syndrome literally mean a wife packs her bags and leaves, or is it something even more menacing? How many walk away wives are cheating on their husbands? On this episode I welcome back Ossiana Tepfenhart, writer and social provocateur, to explain the correlation between walk away wife syndrome and affairs. See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

You’re a devoted husband with a loving, committed and intelligent wife. You want to family; a traditional American dream with a wife, kids, and a cozy home. But secretly you’re in love with another man. You and he have an emotional, passionate and sexy love affair that you can’t seem to put aside. For my guests today, Mark and David (not their real names or voices) this was their life, until more than a decade after they met, their lives were changed forever. See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

You’ve cheated. You’ve done the deed. Whether that’s sleeping with, having oral sex with, or hiding an emotional affair with a person outside of your relationship, you’ve done it: you’ve created the time and space to have an affair. Now you lie incessantly to cover it up. Your conscience is telling you that you’ve got a decision to make. Do you come clean, or do you deny, deny, deny the affair at all costs? On this episode I welcome Marie Murphy who is a relationship coach with a PhD in the sociology of sexuality. Dr. Murphy uses a unique, individualized and non - judgmental approach to help her clients answer the question: Should you tell your partner if you've cheated on them? See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.