Cashing in with T.J. Miller

Cash and T.J. talk about beekeepers, vampires vs werewolves, tiny dogs, snake necks, astrology, lost instincts, holiday cards, mankind's progress, making friends, scamp knuckles, and ask the question, "What will become of Triskett Hurlibutton?" Listen to this episode in solitary confinement while taking a sample from nature's snack bar. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Cash and TJ talk about birthdays, pirates, ear enlargers, cliff tents, naan cocoons, Kirk Douglas, bird people, and ask the question, "Has anyone ever made it to Yonderland?" This episode sounds best while drinking pure grain alcohol and playing a game of Yahtzee! Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

TJ briefly ducks into the studio during the break and finds out what it's like to be Cash Levy. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Cash and TJ experience withdrawal symptoms and have a quick, ten-minute conversation during their sabbatical. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Cash and TJ talk about moonshine tweeting, pregnant carpooling, chocolate-aholics, confused bigots, blackout cake, snexting, sneaky lions, anas connections, foodie fatties, and ask the question, "Does evil exist?" Listen to this landmark New Year's edition while driving in the emergency lane, it sounds like a string coming off a sweater. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Cash and TJ talk about Santa's secrets, perfect gifts, offensive holiday euphemisms, candy canes, the twelve days of hair, the star of David, Jack Frosty, Syrian pharaohs, Rapunzel tugs, and ask the question "Who is Thomas Blueberry?" This episode should be on the top of your tree. Put on some ear enlargers and listen to it while eating a healthy portion of Reindeer Venison... Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Cash and TJ talk about concert etiquette, penis whistles, voice-overs, sneak-ins, hit-and-run, STDs vs parking spaces, desert Island companions, and ask the question, "Have you read the 'Full body Release Report'?" Don't spend your hard-earned time on this comedy tapestry, it would be unselfish not to. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Cash and TJ talk about Elf altercations, "Sneak Insomes," bathrobe guilt, paparazzi shame, Chapstick borrowing, ugly art, sword holsters, moonshine comebacks, and ask the question, "Why do people age so quickly at Smoky Joes Spin Cycle Cafe?" To avoid getting sick, listen to this episode while wearing a Cashphrase Necklace and take heavy doses of Oscillococcinum. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Cash and T.J. talk about bad storytellers, hot PBS hosts, holiday burnout, walking in Memphis, freeballing in Montana, breakfast putdowns, Whirlybirds vs Choppers, Elks tales, embarrassing moments, and ask the question, "What is a Glastle?" This episode tastes best with a healthy dose of Mermaid soup. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Cash and TJ talk about time-traveling wizards, valet hustlers, new perfumes, funny rock stars, packing mistakes, Aristophanes beard, Medusa, and ask the question, "Do the Russians love their children too?" Before listening, make sure to have some Da-Shi Pie and procrasturbate while listening to ZZ Top. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Cash and TJ discuss Mars discoveries, Flippers ego, arm pockets, Nascar improvements, baby names, friend haters, choir debacles, shopping strategies, Hiking vs. Walking and ask the question, "Why are Pandas so sexually active?" For best effect, listen to this episode while being chased by a herd of angry button collectors. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Cash and TJ talk about the presidential election, adventures in babysitting, foreplay strategies, best first date options, bad impressions, horse berating, factual lying, piggyback rides, rodeo clowns and ask the question, "Where can you see the Terrible Timbers?" For best results, listen to this episode on stilts while wearing a top hat. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Cash and TJ talk about bachelor castles, butterfly superheroes, diminishing returns, WTF, Broccoli penis, Halloween costumes, Venus flytraps, pookie hatchs and ask the question, "When is it OK to pull the Twitler card?" Focus groups indicate this episode is popular with elderly women that love to gamble, it's a custom fit. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Cash and TJ discuss The Galactic Wizard, The World Series, great costumes, messages from God, forgetting names, The Regal Beagle, surprise parties, and ask the question, "Why don't TJ's parents ever come to visit?" This episode has a money-back guarantee, just don't try to use it. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Cash and TJ drop a hot, tasty pod at the LAPodfest. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Cash and TJ talk about Oscar the Grouch, daddy's long legs, heroic deeds, parking lot etiquette, "fuper glue", hide and seek, "pookie hatches", tip jars, and ask the question, "How much time has to pass before we call them the Backstreet Men?" This may be the best episode so far, listen while doing a "Full Body Ingestion". Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Cash and TJ talk about the Nerdist barricade, apologetic apologies, Rock vs Roll, alien abduction, skinny whales, relationship guidelines, job imposters, lifesaving techniques, voodoo dolls, and ask the question, "What is Rule #2?" For an optimal viewing experience, watch this episode while eating pistachios and Orville Reddenbacher popcorn. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

T.J. interviews Cash about his habit of sneaking into Super Bowls, N.B.A Finals, Wimbledon, concerts, amusement parks, movies and asks the question, "Is it undignified to wear a fake mustache?" This episode is being investigated by the Federal Bureau of Investigation, listen while it's still legal. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Cash and TJ talk about drinking games, coonskin caps, bodyguard gifts, rhyming runners, pelvis hats, modern-day ogres, conch hands, naan overdoses, Botfly poems, and ask the question, "Why does Cash read Lord of the Flies before every show?" This is the longest episode yet, drink a gallon of Jamba immunity boost before listening. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Cash and T.J. talk about dropping hot pods, Groupon gangs, bitchy robots, elbow licking, cumbersome gifts, three-headed babies, skywriter heckling, partial monster disclosers, and ask the question, "Is a Superpac funding T.J.'s Twitter campaign?" If you can only listen to one episode of Cashing In, choose this one. It leaves you wanting less..... Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Cash and T.J. talk about Tweeter's remorse, monster hobbies, world warming, flailing man hands, inflatable gorillas, spray tanning, sandwich board ulcers, night scrubs, artificial hearts and ask the question, "Who is Trisket Hurlibutton?" This episode was taped in the state of Denver and inspired the Broadway musical "Behind the Wheat Thin." Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Cash and TJ celebrate fan appreciation Tuesday by discussing sexual superheroes, pet skunks, silly putty, elbow beards, cooter punch, co-dependence meet-ups, pancake hands, the syphilis card, and ask the question, "Does TJ have a toddler tush?" Most people will wear some type of costume while listening to this episode, we don't know why... Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Cash and TJ discuss the paradox of choice, sleep dialing, Olympic orgies, itinerant beards, exclusive vowels, accidental heroines, wrist guard waitresses, hair ultimatums, and ask the question, "Have you ever seen The Deer Hunter? In an effort to make it creepy, this entire episode is in "air quotes." Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Cash and TJ talk about disaster movies, heckler revenge, wordplay haters, pregnant men, tender naan, VIPS in Heaven, botfly poets, cell phone holsters, childbearing limits and ask the question, "When is it inappropriate to use a Cashphrase?" If anyone is offended by this episode, please enjoy a complimentary pint of Cantaloupe Hands ice cream and a ticket to "The Three Levels of Neville." Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Cash and T.J. talk about the marketing of sunsets, eyelash forests, tiny face patches, auxiliary penises, Benihana vs fireworks, redeemable horses, sexual vessels, ultimate frisbee, and ask the question, "Can a hole have too many shirts?" This episode smells like potatoes and a sack of formaldehyde, some listeners will walk 500 miles for it. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Cash and T.J. discuss five-minute sex, uber sausages, splendid footgolf, native American strippers, 50-dollar tips, bridesmaid cats, homeless snails, Abe Lincoln vs. Barack Obama, and ask the question, "Why won't Cash accept the existence of athletes foot?" Listen to this episode while playing Footgolf at midnight and let the self-actualization begin... Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Cash and TJ analyze the Pemberton Buttlesticks campaign, cherub-faced cops, canopy cocks, public urination, pretend sleepwalkers, motivational lying, french flatulence, fish hate, Wrigley Field, and ask the question, "Should politicians have a Triple Banger Lightening Round?" Transcripts of this episode are not available for fear it would spark a revolution... Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

The guys talk about shirt cannons, safe zones, pre-apologies, space masturbation, palatine uvulas, chicken dances, cheat sheets, The Socratic Approach, and asks the question, "When do you play the Hitler card?" This episode is just as exciting as the "Big Fun Tour" so try not to get arrested while listening... Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Cash and TJ talk about man caves, four floors of whores, double stink eyes, elephant superheroes, insecure sombreros, lefty prejudice, old apartments, and ask the question, "Is it impolite to have sex with your wife when she's in a coma?" This episode was recorded on CB Radio at a Renaissance Pleasure Faire, listen while you convoy... Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Cash and T.J discuss night frights, cat attacks, "bro's before hoes", throwing soup, Shakespeare, mermaid sex, wingman etiquette, webisode braggers, and ask the question, "Who is Pemberton Buttlesticks?" This episode includes three snaps and a butt slap and it will make you're Tipsy Wipsy feel better... Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Cash and TJ talk about his alter ego, therapist sightings, horror theme songs, Hobie cat mishaps, waxing and waning, ahi deodorant, cake strippers, bibs and bonnets, sticky tipping, and ask the question, "How do you sail too close to the wind?" This episode challenges listeners to celebrate their own "Whatever I Want Day" with a Coca-Cola Classic and juniper berry balls... Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Cash and T.J. talk about earthquake sex, Sir Mixolot, bachelorette parties, alien probing, "Cash and the Bad Checks", lasso tears, natures harmonica, Gladys phobia, and ask the question, "Why is Cash blindfolded for each episode?" This episode challenges the listeners to Kick TJ's knees for gold and then eat the Tilapia... Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Cash and T.J. discuss the Blue Man Group, sniffing paint, anti birthday greetings, car goggles, pre-recorded sunsets, moon respect, gmail prejudice, air hugs, and ask the question, "Why does Cash act like a little girl at concerts?" No animals were harmed in the making of this episode, but we were pretty awful to some minerals and vegetables. Berated a carrot for 20 minutes... Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Cash and T.J. analyze his last fight, happy endings, clumsy girlfriends, Revenge of the Nerds, chain mail, Billy goat puke, cactus cock, self-checkout issues and ask the question, "Do T.J's wild eyes intimidate other men?" If the Karate Kid had listened to this episode, Mr. Miyagi would have been superfluous... Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Cash and T.J discuss cavemen tantrums, goth day at Disneyland, bicycle stakeouts, lozenge confusion, hoarding baseballs, silent crying, vetoing breakups, and ask the question, "Is it better to go skydiving or eat tacos?" Whoever conceives a child during this episode will have a free pass to all "Cashing in" after party's.... Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Cash, T.J. and a mysterious visitor analyze lawyers with tattoos, egotistical flatbread, pajama etiquette, stoned therapists, air jamming, alcoholic dentists, gang names, Beauty and the Beast and ask the question, "Would Cash do whatever a talking dog wants?'" This episode was recorded in the state of Denver and will be used as a cautionary tale in future "DARE" campaigns... Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Cash and T.J. analyze horse chicks, Rob Lowe's manta ray adventure, name-dropping, Chipotle's tiny lots, sidecar Segways, T.J's costume toggery, octopus showers, and ask the question, "Was James Dean really Judd Nelson?" This episode has its own commemorative bumper sticker. It says, "Jesus does my checking!" Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

T.J. and Cash coin some new phrases and discuss leaf blowers vs religious zealots, free standing reindeer, pear shaped girls, competitive eating, god stalking, dog punching, pterodactyl balls, and why sex isn't more pleasurable than eating. This episode is an honestode full of "Real Juice", drink it up... Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Cash and T.J. discuss hitting on girls in motion, cheesy Disc Jockies, Texas wingmen, Korean fire drills, monocle revivals, shooting sprees, French-type people, and ask the question, "Should 'Poemos' be allowed to marry?" This controversial episode has been banned in France, but is #1 in the UK and/or Syria... Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

T.J. and Cash exchange views on the hand-gliding mafia, robot dog lawyers, 20-cent Bloody Marys, ironic mustaches, BBQ holidays, expensive shoes, cocooning, TJ's Indefatigablility, getting lost in Borneo, and ask the question, "Would you fistfight an Orangutan for $2000 dollars?" This episode includes expletives about the devil, if you play it backward, there's a secret message about Rosie O'Donnell's whereabouts… Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

In this episode T.J. and Cash talk about animalistic desires, Abraham Lincoln's ghost, tuna-safe dolphins, performing in Afghanistan, the brothel of Cash Levy's mind, shark attacks, fake elevator calls, tips on renting an apt, and ask the question, "Why are Cheetahs, such needy lovers?" No animals were tested in the taping of this episode, but one Ostrich may have been offended… Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Cash and T.J. discuss having sex with big foot, vacationing with Whoopi Goldberg, handsome voice-over stars, penises to scale, rope swing conceptions, partying with Einstein, gaining weight on meth, getting your time machine in order, being "stoned" to death, and how to give the spork more street credibility. Quite possibly the best one yet. Memorize this episode and write a rock ballad about it... Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Cash and TJ asses if rioting is an excuse for looting, John Mayer's questionable activities, blood diamonds, vases of dead flowers, freak paddle boating accidents, thread count, unhappy football watchers, why trumpets aren't useful, hair shirts, sex with a florists wife, and ask the question "why don't homeless people take vacations?" This episode is short on time but small on taste. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

T.J. and Cash analyze if a three-way constitutes cheating, chicken facials, trusting cab drivers, making love on flag day, meeting John Stamos, the academy awards, stupid dog photos, liquid dick, and ask the question, "is it ok to masturbate while watching a tsunami?" This is one of our favorite episodes. It includes a Twology and may necessitate a shower... Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Cash and T.J. discuss inappropriate foster parents, heroin success stories, ballbusting, biodegradable gum, The 4th of July debacle, billboard ideas, good hotel strategy, cotton candy limits, and if reflecting water makes you look fat. This is the episode you shouldn't miss because it precedes the next one. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

T.J. and Cash talk about embracing bag women, the persecution of baby Lima beans, getaway cars, the pussification of men, depressing strippers, if people deserve to have jobs, useful phrases, and ask the question, "Did Buddha have a weight problem?" This inaugural episode is sponsored by Pod Cream. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices