Your Kickstarter Sucks

HEY! Wake up! I’m guessing you were probably asleep when this episode came out. I mean, we’re asleep for a third of our lives, so we got a decent shot. And I love a damn underdog. Well now that you’re awake, would you like to go to the bathroom and squeeze out like a millimeter of pee? Don’t forget to keep your eyes kind of halfway closed so you don’t get all the way waked up. That always works. Alright now that you’re done and settling back into bed it’s time to relax completely without peeking at the time on the clock. Just kidding, motherfucker! It’s 3am. Now you’re fucked. Might as well listen to the show. And what a show it is! Today we got a few things I think you’ll like. Well, you will if you like “camera-wires.” And if you like AI-generated football insights mailed to you a year after the actual event, you’ll be in hog heaven. Not to mention if you have an affection at all for F-tier CGI sticking Santa Clause “in the shit”. But onion tear likers? You’re shit outta luck. The rest of yas? Get in here! It’s 3:02am. Time to laugh! Music for YKS is courtesy of Howell Dawdy, Craig Dickman, Mr. Baloney, and Mark Brendle. Additional research by Zeke Golvin. YKS is edited by Producer Dan. Social Media by Maddalena Alvarez.YKS Premium - It’s like YKS…on steroids!!! Which I have been considering doing lately. Hey, why not? It could be a cool way to gain respect with few side effects.. This past week, we were joined by Blowback’s Brendan James for a very long and very scary episode all about Stephen King/George Romero joint Creepshow! And this week, to finish off Miketober V, we’re joined once again by the inimitable Howell Dawdy. So now’s the time…watch your movies, take your vitamins, sign up for YKS Premium, and…sleep well…ha ha ha. Follow us on Instagram: @YKSPod, TikTok: YourKickstarterSucks and subscribe to our YouTube channel for more video stuff! This episode of YKS is sponsored by these fine brands:Rocket Money - Rocket Money can help you set up a custom budget by identifying top spending categories and suggesting areas where you can adjust your spending habits! Now dat sounds nice! Check em out and save yourself some cash at RocketMoney.com/YKS!Factor - I deserve a restaurant-like experience…but I HATE going to restaurants. So obviously, I’m pretty hard to please. That was, until they introduced the wonderful Factor Meals! Now I’m eating good in MY OWN neighborhood…that’s right. My home. But don’t pay full price! Head to FACTORMEALS.com/yks50 and use code yks50 to get 50% off your first box and 20% off your next month.See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

Eeeeeeeevveeerryyybboooody do the new show dance! Oh yeah! Let’s do it! I see you! Wow, guys, I knew you were super talented and always up for a crazy time, but I had no idea fans of YKS were such groovy groovers! You were really movin that thing! Well let’s put that energy to good use, shall we? By sitting still and quiet for like 2 hours while some other guys talk about the computer. Starting right….NOW! On today’s show we’ve got a pet memorial which honestly is fine just a little pretentious maybe but not every one of these is gonna be like CyberTruck Pedestrian Scraper, ya know? Sometimes it’s just a silly little doodad. And the idea is it prompts further spontaneous conversation. So get off my ass! And stop dancing! Plus we’ve got a QR code you can finally wear on your lapel, money you can wear on your finger, and a book that I think even the Comic Book Guy would say is the “Worst. Idea. Ever”! ™ . Copyright. Or maybe there’s some other worst ideas on the thing I forget. Only one way to find out…to keep fucking still and listen to the show! And then go on the Pisscord and say if there’s anything weird about it so we can read it and feel bad. Enjoy!Music for YKS is courtesy of Howell Dawdy, Craig Dickman, Mr. Baloney, and Mark Brendle. Additional research by Zeke Golvin. YKS is edited by Producer Dan. Social Media by Maddalena Alvarez.YKS Premium - Everyone’s favorite month is here! That’s right, Miketober 1st - Miketober 31st has arrived and you’re finding yourself smack dab in the middle of it all. What’s it all about though? Well, it’s nothing more than the freepiest and deepiest movies ever to grace the silver screen, and the fellas who love em. That’s us! Sign up today at Patreon.com/yourkickstartersucks to get not only Miketobers 1-5, but many more hundreds of hours of similar wacky concepts such as, Simian Month, Orangutember, and, of course, Ape Christmas. Just 5 bananas a month! Follow us on Instagram: @YKSPod, TikTok: YourKickstarterSucks and subscribe to our YouTube channel for more video stuff! This episode of YKS is sponsored by these fine brands:Pretty Litter  - Well, the cat’s gotta doodoo on somethin, don’t it? I reckon cats will never stop doodooing. Lucky for us, we can use their bathroom predilections to help find out if they’re sick! That’s right, you can monitor your cat’s health with Pretty Litter! Plus, it’s lightweight as all get out and they’ll bring it to your door. How? Well, by means of a URL, of course! And here it is: Go to PrettyLitter.com/YKS to save 20% on your FIRST order and get a free cat toy.The Great YKS Advertiser Survey! Hey help your boys out and answer a coupla harmless q’s about what kinda stuff we could hawk on here. Hawk tuah that is. Just kidding; it’s not that. Head to Gum.FM/YKS if ya don’t mind doin that quick favor. Survey on that thang!See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

By day I’m a simple bartender…but by night…ahh!!! I really let my hair down and I become…The Beverage Entrepreneur! No you haven’t stumbled your way into one of the middling lunchpail Comedy Bang Bang episodes that didn’t even make it into the annual Top 10, you’re actually listening to one of the funniest episodes of YKS ever! On today’s very show, we have a nice Adult Toy that can Help, a sparkling water that will send the wokies reeing, and finally a use for those pesky plastic straws we’re all trying to buy more of. Plus, a few other things, like a celebrity who clearly wasn’t briefed on what the show is about and they get mad halfway through and we kinda gotta just gut it out! Oh well! Discuss it on the subreddit! Music for YKS is courtesy of Howell Dawdy, Craig Dickman, Mr. Baloney, and Mark Brendle. Additional research by Zeke Golvin. YKS is edited by Producer Dan. Social Media by Maddalena Alvarez.YKS Premium - Miketober comes but once a year! And so do most of our listeners! Sign up today at Patreon.com/YourKickstarterSucks to catch every pulse-pounding episode and hell, maybe you’ll even bust a nut! I don’t know!Follow us on Instagram: @YKSPod, TikTok: YourKickstarterSucks and subscribe to our YouTube channel for more video stuff! This week’s episode is brought to you by these fine brands:Factor - Head to factormeals.com/yks50 and use code yks50 to get 50% off your first box and 20% off your next month. Unless you hate yummy food?? Buhh??See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

Go home, YKS…you’re drunk! Oh wait no you aren’t. You’re just making another good ass funny ass episode of the show we all love to listen to. And after all, the show is quite beloved by many all around the world…so why wouldn’t we make more episodes of it? Well maybe we will get bored or hit by a bus or something. But not this week! We did one. And on it, we had some good ass shit such as the following: a movie about how to time travel, a drink that mixes up it own self for you and there’s no booze or mixer in it, and also something called Morphy Richards. Morphy Richards. Well anyway, it sounds funny. So. Bring your sense of humor! It’s required!Music for YKS is courtesy of Howell Dawdy, Craig Dickman, Mr. Baloney, and Mark Brendle. Additional research by Zeke Golvin. YKS is edited by Producer Dan. Social Media by Maddalena Alvarez.YKS Premium is the ONLY place you can find the frequently-listened-to, fake movie trivia and plot recap series MIKETOBER! Coming to Patreon this month! And presumably for many years thereafter. But for now, head on over to Patreon.com/yourkickstartersucks to belly up to the movie bar and suck down a bottle of cinema suds with your buds Mike and JF!Follow us on Instagram: @YKSPod  and TikTok: YourKickstarterSucksThis episode of YKS is brought to you by these fine brands: Rocket Money - Let Rocket Money help you reach your financial goals faster (like a rocket or some other similarly speedy mode of transport!!!) Get Rocket Money today at RocketMoney.com/YKSSee Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

I’m out of town so I’m gonna make this one quick, alright? Girl Scout Cookies are cookies sold by Girl Scouts in the United States to raise funds to support Girl Scout councils and individual troops. The cookies are widely popular and are commonly sold by going door-to-door, online, through school or town fundraisers, or at "cookie booths" set up at storefronts.[1] The program is intended to both raise money and improve the financial literacy of girls. During an average selling season (usually January through April), more than one million girls sell over 200 million packages of cookies and raise over $800 million.[2][3] The first known sale of cookies by Girl Scouts was in 1917.[4][5][6] Cookie sales are organized by 112 regional Girl Scout councils[7] who select one of two national bakeries to buy cookies from.[3][8]Plus we learn about Disease X.Video of this episode is available at Patreon.com/yourkickstartersucksMusic for YKS is courtesy of Howell Dawdy, Craig Dickman, Mr. Baloney, and Mark Brendle. Additional research by Zeke Golvin. YKS is edited by Producer Dan. Follow us on Instagram: @YKSPod  and TikTok: YourKickstarterSucksSee Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

Where Faith Meets Fun! Where Faith Meets Fun! Where Faith Meets Fun! Right here, on YKS! On today’s show we got dog vitamins, something that improves voicemail somehow (other than making your outgoing message a recording of you in the bathroom with your buddy), and the one and only, the man without whom none of this would be possible, the great Jan-Ove Waldner! Music for YKS is courtesy of Howell Dawdy, Craig Dickman, Mr. Baloney, and Mark Brendle. Additional research by Zeke Golvin. YKS is edited by Producer Dan. It may just be mid September…but already our eyes turn…to Miketober! Get all the scaretacular fun on YKS Premium in just a couple of weeks!Follow us on Instagram: @YKSPod  and TikTok: YourKickstarterSucksThis episode of YKS is sponsored by these fine brands:Factor - You get a meal! And you get a meal! And you get a meal! Look under your chair…there’s a meal there! That is, if you have a chair on your porch or in your yard or in the office downstairs where the packages get delivered! Because with Factor, it’s never been easier to eat meals. Head to FACTORMEALS.com/yks50 and use code yks50 to get 50% off your first box plus 20% off your next month.See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

Sometimes you’ll look at the title of an episode and think to yourself, “Oh yeah, I remember why the title of the episode was gonna be this. Because we did a good riff on what The Duckcaller’s Lament would be. And then you got some times where you have to write “Pumpkin Master’s Sake Bones” down in the title box, and you wish you could crawl into a hole and die. There are a lot more of those weeks. Anyway on today’s show, we got Lil’ Entrepreneurs, a movie that feels like a fake movie inside a fake movie, and a nice Guilt App that makes you feel bad for just sitting around doing nothing evil. And plus, God willing, a riff about Sake Bones that justifies this incomprehensible mishmash of an episode title. Please. Music for YKS is courtesy of Howell Dawdy, Craig Dickman, Mr. Baloney, and Mark Brendle. Additional research by Zeke Golvin. YKS is edited by Producer Dan. Whether it’s talking more about Kickstarter, or talking to our friends about old men’s buttholes, YKS Premium is the destination for even more DB and JF content! $5/mo gets you a bonus episode of the show every single damn week, ad free episodes, and access to the exclusive YKS Pisscord! Think of it like a club with a bunch of guys in it who don’t like going to clubs. And oh yeah, I’m the boss. Follow us on Instagram: @YKSPod  and TikTok: YourKickstarterSucksThis episode of YKS is brought to you by these fine brands:Rocket Money - Save money, dammit!!! With Rocket Money. At RocketMoney.com/YKSSee Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

Weee-hoo!! Yowee!! We got a Class 5 YKS comin in hot so we’re gonna wanna get all the way around it and drop our headphones right in its path! Yeah the first one kind of already did all this but this one has a bunch of 20 year olds in it so…yeeehawww!!! Well I’d keep joking about that crap but I haven’t finished watching it yet. Stick around for part 2 of the Twisters 2 Riff in the next episode description. Until then, you’ll have to be satisfied with an app for battle rapping, a way to keep your desserts warm on the go, and a decidedly unwoke independent movie! It’s a YKS Thing, baby! You probably do understand.Music for YKS is courtesy of Howell Dawdy, Craig Dickman, Mr. Baloney, and Mark Brendle. Additional research by Zeke Golvin. YKS is edited by Producer Dan. YKS Premium – Now that’s what I call YKS! Get 4 or 5 more episodes of our crazy content every month at patreon.com/yourkickstartersucks!Follow us on Instagram: @YKSPod  and TikTok: YourKickstarterSucksThis episode of YKS is sponsored by these fine brands: Factor - Oh the food you’ll eat! Oh the snacks you will munch! When you get Factor Meals for Dinner and Lunch! Go to FactorMeals.com/yks50 for 50% off first box plus 20% off your next monthSee Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

MORTUY: Oh geez Rick, I don’t know about this one Rick. It looks like we accidentally portaled to a planet where there’s a ruling race of sentient Kickstarter projects! Oh man, oh geez Rick. I just want to go home and pull my pud man. I don’t want to do all this space flying stuff anymore man. Look at that one…it’s like a stupid pirate card game and it’s coming at me! Ahh!! And look over there, it’s a stupid podcast about how we’re all the same! Oh god it’s horrifying. But I think I’m most terrified of the guy who went to do some sex tourism and thought it was cute! Okay that’s a real guy so it’s not really like an alien thing but man that’s really scary, too. Right, Rick? Uhh…rick??RICK: (Flashing his space credit card) One for booty on the poop deck, please! Morpy I love you. Music for YKS is courtesy of Howell Dawdy, Craig Dickman, Mr. Baloney, and Mark Brendle. Additional research by Zeke Golvin. YKS is edited by Producer Dan. You know how you sometimes see an out of order toilet that people clearly still kept shitting into even though there was no way it could take down even the amount of poop and pee and toilet paper it already had in there? Yep. YKS PremiumFollow us on Instagram: @YKSPod  and TikTok: YourKickstarterSucksSee Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

You’re not gonna believe this one! Oh yeah! What! That’s right! It’s more of that CRAZY Thing you love! Oh yeah! YKS! Wahoo!!!!On today’s Wet and Wild show, we’ve got a graphic novel (comic book), one gross freako’s stupid movie idea warehouse, an app for DUI guys, and more! Wow, that sounds really Wet and Wild. Oh yes it definitely does. So we better get to it! Oh yeah! Music for YKS is courtesy of Howell Dawdy, Craig Dickman, Mr. Baloney, and Mark Brendle. Additional research by Zeke Golvin. YKS is edited by Producer Dan. YKS Premium is where you’re gonna wanna go…where nobody knows your name! Yeah we keep it pretty anonymous over there behind the paywall, unless someone stops you in the middle of the street and asks you what you’re listening to, and you have to go, “Uh…I don’t know…Sissy brainwashing mp3s?” Follow us on Instagram: @YKSPod  and TikTok: YourKickstarterSucksThis episode of YKS is sponsored by these fine brands: Rocket Money - Huh? What? I thought a broke person said something! Hey it’s 2024 and we could use every little dollar we can get. Big or small, all dollars are important! And a lot of them end up going to subscriptions I couldn’t give 2 flips about. So let’s get Rocket Money in there to help staunch the bleeding! Stop wasting money on things you don’t use. Cancel your unwanted subscriptions by going to RocketMoney.com/YKS. Factor One “factor” I use to determine my meal-happiness quotient (MHQ) is the amount of good discount I’m apply to my cart! Of course there are many others as well. But, the discount code is the…denominator (??). Well anyway. For a MHQ of over 9000…use code YKS50 at FactorMeals.com/YKS50 to get 50% off your first box plus 20% off your next month while your subscription is active!See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

Time’s a funny thing…here I am waiting to eat some dinner. But hours from now, perhaps even years, you might find yourself sitting down to listen to this episode and awaiting a different meal of your own. Breakfast, perhaps; or even lunch. And yet both of us, wherever we are – WHENever we are – know that we likey to eat some yummy food. Heh. Sometimes this big blue marble we call home just makes me smile. On today’s episode we’ve got a heap of tech that don’t make much sense at all, some real religious goofball stuff, and a bonus baby project. Hey thanks DB!  Music for YKS is courtesy of Howell Dawdy, Craig Dickman, Mr. Baloney, and Mark Brendle. Additional research by Zeke Golvin. YKS is edited by Producer Dan. YKS Premium - You ain’t seen nothin yet! Ohhh baby you just ain’t seen nothin yet! Grab video episodes and more at Patreon.com/yourkickstartersucks.Follow us on Instagram: @YKSPod  and TikTok: YourKickstarterSucksSee Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

Goo goo! Ga ga! And all the rest. We’re back from our little break with a bundle of joy: that’s right, a new episode of YKS! To celebrate, we’re taking a tour through some of Kickstarter’s most baby-brained ideas. Join us as we discover the baby chain, the cheeky changer, and oh yes, the bottle buggy, plus a few other ways to harm or at least not do much to help the most precious and vulnerable creatures on Earth: future podcasters! Now if you’ll excuse me, it’s time to go clean doo doo off someone’s balls! Oh DAN!!!!Music for YKS is courtesy of Howell Dawdy, Craig Dickman, Mr. Baloney, and Mark Brendle. Additional research by Zeke Golvin. YKS is edited by Producer Dan. Think of YKS Premium like one of those surprise births where the mommy goes to the bathroom and then a baby falls into the toilet and she goes “I didn’t even know I was pregnant!” That’s basically the show. And then you gotta fish us out of the toilet. And go to the hospital. Follow us on Instagram: @YKSPod  and TikTok: YourKickstarterSucksThis episode of YKS is sponsored by these fine brands:Factor - Just because it’s summer doesn’t mean you get to stop eating food! In fact, many people continue to eat food all year long. And we recommend doing it with Factor. Head to FactorMeals.com/yks50 and use code yks50 to get 50% off your first box plus 20% off your next monthSee Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

Aw db come on man. Can't be putting crotch on there man. First of all its from the episode, like you're supposed to do with these. Second, as you will learn in this episode, there are something like 8 million crotches on planet earth and basically everybody has one. Now, if I my continue.Folks, this week we've got a whole mess of new kickstarters to yap about and we're bringing you along for the ride. We got some crotch thing, something for your toilet and holy heck we even got a christian dating app! Ohh we're lonely and we believe in god ohhh. get real. Just playing okay see you guys later.Music for YKS courtesy of Wavmage, Howell Dawdy, Craig Dickman and Mark Brendle. YKS is edited by Producer Dan. Art by ExtraNapkins and animation by PremiumContent. Additional research by Zeke Golvin.Join YKS Premium and unlock exclusive access to video content, ad-free episodes and access to the YKS discord. Over 1 million hours* of premium audio and video content: just one click away.See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

Step into a multi-sensory experience that combines the pleasure of taste with the benefits of natural ingredients and the power.. of podcasting. That's right its another YKS and I won't stand around jacking you off any futher, ill let you get to it because this one is a real hooter and thats the gods honest truth.In fact, I believe so much in the strength of this episode that I (Jesse Farar) am personally guaranteeing at least 10,000 laughs this episode or I WILL PERSONALLY refund you from my own pocket.I say again, Any person whomsoever laughs but 9,999 times, one laugh short of the agreed upon 10,000 laughs, is hereby entitled to FULL compensation by me (Jesse Farrar) Music for YKS courtesy of Wavmage, Howell Dawdy, Craig Dickman and Mark Brendle. YKS is edited by Producer Dan. Art by ExtraNapkins and animation by PremiumContent. Additional research by Zeke Golvin.Upgrade to YKS Premium to unlock over one thousand hours of content (probably) There's a lot of shit on there. You gonna tell me there isn't a thousand hours of shit on there? It is probably insanely close. Like 900 hours. I would not be surprised if there were 900 to 1000 hours of content on the YKS Patreon.. One episode is like an hour. and theres like a thousand episodes so you tell me.See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

Good Morning Monday Morning! Today I might just feel like taking a look at a few Kickstarters, including a cabinet friend, a watch that helps you fish, and you guessed it, a way to give cops more money! And well, it looks like a great moment of history to check in on an open-carry freak, which we do in this episode because he had a Kickstarter one time. We did record this one a few weeks ago, so that’s pretty lucky! Who could have guessed something insane would happen in the interim. Ah well, neverless. Plus Jeremy Renner is here!Music for YKS is courtesy of Howell Dawdy, Craig Dickman, Mr. Baloney, and Mark Brendle. Additional research by Zeke Golvin. YKS is edited by Producer Dan. YKS Premium - I actually think coffee has gotten so expensive that “less than a cup of coffee” no longer has the intended meaning of “very cheap”. So instead I will say that YKS Premium is your destination for hundreds of hours of bonus YKS, including all Miketobers, Jesseuarys, YKS Beach Partys, and exclusive episodes with beloved guests Stefan and John from Blocked Party, Nick and Mitch from the Doughboys, and many many times where we just changed our voices a little bit and pretended we were, like, Leonard Maltin for an hour. Those are very old episodes. Anyway, lots of good stuff on there too so check it out.Follow us on Instagram: @YKSPod  and TikTok: YourKickstarterSucksThis episode of YKS is sponsored by these fine brands:Factor - Head to FACTORMEALS.com/yks50 and use code yks50 to get 50% off your first box plus 20% off your next month. Meals. Now that’s what I call, “It’s lunch or dinner”. See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

My precious listeners! I come to you once again, hat in hand, and hat on head, to ask you: check out this episode of the show. On this one we got a hat that even I (hatliking man) wouldn’t wear, an application that uses your phone camera to tell you that you are looking at a piece of food, and a crazy guy having a crazy guy kind of time. Plus, All The Rest! Music for YKS is courtesy of Howell Dawdy, Craig Dickman, Mr. Baloney, and Mark Brendle. Additional research by Zeke Golvin. YKS is edited by Producer Dan. YKS Premium - Oh it’s a party y’all! The hawk tuah girl is here and she says “The bonus episodes of YKS rock!” Thereby crystallizing forever our place in viral moment history! Wow! Follow us on Instagram: @YKSPod and TikTok: YourKickstarterSucksStop wasting money on things you don’t use. Cancel your unwanted subscriptions by going to RocketMoney.com/yksSee Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

Just what are these crazy YKS guys up to now? Well it all starts with the “episode introduction”. Many dedicated fans think this is the best part of any YKS episode, but the true fan knows that the show really kicks into gear around the famous 6 pack. That’s the segment of the show where the guys fabricate an extremely realistic frog prop and wing it against the wall a few times. Or, wait, I don’t know. I think it’s something else. Anyway from there it’s basically time to enter the Begging Zone, where they beg the fans not to kill them, and then about 4 more hours of dead air and it’s the end of the ep. On this week’s show, there’s a pool guy and a weird mattress thing and a mailbox idea. And the frog prop comes to life, stands up to Mike and JF, and demands its freedom. Anyway, it’s a hell of an episode. So I personally would recommend checking this one out.  Music for YKS is courtesy of Howell Dawdy, Craig Dickman, Mr. Baloney, and Mark Brendle. Additional research by Zeke Golvin. YKS is edited by Producer Dan. YKS Premium - IT’S the place to find Mike and JF and Producer Dan too! They’re all over there waiting for you! Follow us on Instagram: @YKSPod  and TikTok: YourKickstarterSucksThis week’s episode of YKS is sponsored by these fine brands:Factor - You’re gonna wanna go to FactorMeals.com/yks50 to get 50% off your first box plus 20% off your next month. Uhhhh yeah. You’re gonna wanna do that. See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

Copy, paste, copy paste, it’s just that easy to write an episode description, right? Uhh….RIGHT?! On today’s episode of this crazy show we call YKS, we have a political card game, oh actually for some insane reason we basically have two of them. We also have an AI project so delusional and distasteful that I’m actually surprised we are looking at it. And lastly, we have a show by a stupid asshole who doesn’t know anything and he’s boring and sucks. And oh by the way, that’s OUR job! Plus something else so it wasn’t really “lastly” on that one. Anyway there’s some stuff on here so have a nice time I have to go to something else. Music for YKS is courtesy of Howell Dawdy, Craig Dickman, Mr. Baloney, and Mark Brendle. Additional research by Zeke Golvin. YKS is edited by Producer Dan. That awkward moment when it’s Friday and you don’t have any more YKS to listen to…YKS Premium solves this.Follow us on Instagram: @YKSPod  and TikTok: YourKickstarterSucksSee Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

Wow we just had a big storm and my power got knocked out. I wonder if I’ll be able to get the episode uploaded in time! On this episode, which is either now being uploaded or nothing happened in any way at all and I’m sitting in the dark like a caveman, we have a screen you can go into when you pass away, which is nice, another layer of abstraction to paste over the top of any of your personal or professional interactions, which is fantastic, and a stupid little piece of rubber. Hell if there were 3 more of the damn things on here I reckon that would make for a great episode. Which there are, and it did/does! So listen to it! Even though it’s summer time and we’re all doing a lot better stuff than listening to our phones, such as (??) and (???). Music for YKS is courtesy of Howell Dawdy, Craig Dickman, Mr. Baloney, and Mark Brendle. Additional research by Zeke Golvin. YKS is edited by Producer Dan. YKS Premium - Ayy, where the party at! Girls is on the way, where the Bacardi at! It’s at YKS Premium! Where we really let our hair down and go crazy! Last Friday we had our friend Zöe Ligon on the show to debut our Miketober Minis with Death Spa (1988)! And this Friday, we will be going Catfish Noodlin’ on the Ol’ Mississip! Just kidding it will be a normal episode where we are sitting down inside and looking at the computer.Follow us on Instagram: @YKSPod  and TikTok: YourKickstarterSucksThis week’s episode of YKS is brought to you by these fine brands:Factor - Yum yum yum! Food isn’t gum! That’s right gang you have to eat better stuff than gum, and our friends at Factor have just what you need! Head to Factormeals.com/yks50 and use code yks50 to get 50% off your first box plus 20% off your next month.Rocket Money - Vroom vroom! Rocket Money is taking you straight to Planet Savings. Hop aboard! Oh but you can’t take those stupid subscriptions with you. That’s okay, right? You want to go to Planet Savings, don’t you, bud? Cancel unwanted subscriptions by going to RocketMoney.com/YKS! Now!See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

I just thought of a guy called “Mr. Electricity”. He could probably zap around and do a lot of fun stuff…plus he would have electricity! Nobody will ever make a movie of this brainless superhero idea I just crapped out in 5 seconds. No. Instead, we’ll all march to the googooplexes to see the latest Noah Baumbach dramedy set in in New York City like the dutiful little consumers we all are. I’m so sick of how Creatives are Punished! Luckily, on today’s show we are giving back to the true creative minds of the earth, by highlighting their wonderful Kickstarter ideas, such as: a fan you put on kids’ food to cool it down, a game you play on Thanksgiving only, and an AI way to talk to your dead grandma. For this public service, we ask nothing in return. Except to please listen to the show, rate us on iTunes, send us emails and voicemails, follow us on social media, and subscribe to the Patreon. A fair trade…for art, no?Music for YKS is courtesy of Howell Dawdy, Craig Dickman, Mr. Baloney, and Mark Brendle. Additional research by Zeke Golvin. YKS is edited by Producer Dan.YKS Premium! The only place to find The Bryan Files and our many other celebrated journalistic achievements. Join the Patreon today at Patreon.com/yourkickstartersucks and be among the first to see the next ideas we ever come up with.Follow us on Instagram: @YKSPod  and TikTok: YourKickstarterSucksThis episode of YKS brought to you by these fine brands:HelloFresh - Go to HelloFresh.com/YKSApps for free apps for life or just use your phone. Well those aren’t free, nevermind. But the HelloFresh ones are. So I’d just go there. See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

Man it got really hot outside recently. I walked out there in my pajamas and I got super sweaty. I guess that’s summer for you. But now I’m safely inside and I’ll remember next time to not go outside in my pajamas. I might just stay inside for the next 50 or so years! Ha ha. Just kidding. On today’s show, we have the standard AI slopdump, and a little bit “Extra” for ya! Including a bigtime loser pretending he’s not a loser, some kind of cold-making contraption, and finally a pillow that will bring both sides of the aisle together. And is that all? No, I guess not but that’s the gist of the situation. To go beyond the gist, listen to the show now!  Music for YKS is courtesy of Howell Dawdy, Craig Dickman, Mr. Baloney, and Mark Brendle. Additional research by Zeke Golvin. YKS is edited by Producer Dan. Want more YKS Premium? Er, I mean do you want more YKS. Then go to YKS Premium! This week on the show, we continue our special investigative series with…The Bryan Files.This episode of YKS is sponsored by these fine brands:Factor - I like this website because you get food from it. Use code yks50 at FactorMeals.com/yks50 to get 50% off your first box plus 20% off your next month while your subscription is active!See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

What more could be said about Episode 357 that hasn’t already been said…Well, for one thing, I suppose we must note that Webster’s Dictionary defines Episode 357 as “The Episode that takes place in between Episodes 356 and 358.” Interestingly, this Episode would go on to become one of the many episodes of YKS released for public consumption in the year 2024. Well if that doesn’t beat all! But what made this episode of YKS so remarkable? An inscrutable lifestyle brand? A stupid fucking sculpture? An actual fascist militia fundraising on the stupid spinning top and board game website? Whatever the case, it certainly has gone down in history as one of the things you can hear on your phone. Which you can start doing…now! Now that you’ve read the description of the episode which you always do first. Thanks.Music for YKS is courtesy of Howell Dawdy, Craig Dickman, Mr. Baloney, and Mark Brendle. Additional research by Zeke Golvin. YKS is edited by Producer Dan. YKS Premium ← This is where I would go if I wanted more YKS. Just sayin…This episode of YKS is sponsored by these fine brands:Rocket Money - Rocket Money!!!! You da man!!! Stop wasting money on stuff you don’t need. Use Rocket Money…and let the Money “Rocket” (rock it)! At RocketMoney.com/yksSee Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

Are you ready to challenge your understanding of wealth building and market dynamics? Imagine for a moment, what if everything you thought you knew about markets was wrong? Well honestly, it probably fucking is. I’m so stupid I thought a baggage service that took my bags from the airport and delivered them to me later was good. I thought a stair-vacuuming robot was worth several million dollars. I even thought there should be a paintball gun attached to a security camera that shot anyone who walked near my house. But of course, I was wrong. And that’s why I’ll never become The Market Genius. Will you? Listen to this episode to find out! Music for YKS is courtesy of Howell Dawdy, Craig Dickman, Mr. Baloney, and Mark Brendle. Additional research by Zeke Golvin. YKS is edited by Producer Dan. YKS Premium – with 750 hours of exclusive, ad-free content available, there has to be at least a few good ones, right? Well, our thousands of satisfied customers can’t possibly be wrong! Or dead with credit card numbers still functioning. There’s no way, right? That would be insane. Anyway there is a ton of stuff there that’s good to hear. I think this week we may even get an update on our of old favorite “jokey” sites…It’s JokeBlogger if you don’t remember.  See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

We're a Christian Youtube channel that creates nursery rhymes! Just kidding. We’re a comedy show that you can listen to when you are sweeping up the floor or folding a towel and going “ah crap that looks stupid” and then folding it a different way. But really, at the end of the day, does it matter what the towels look like when they’re just gonna get dragged all over your butt and stuff anyway? Something to think about. Perhaps while listening to a show!On today’s show – ah, there’s that word again – we have an item that can both style AND color your hair at the same time, an app that lets you review someone as just like a person, and probably one of the craziest things I have ever seen to boot! Sounds like quite the “show”! And yet, you have to “hear” it. This crazy language of English…it always finds a way to entertain. And so, I hope, do we. Don’t email us if we don’t, though. Music for YKS is courtesy of Howell Dawdy, Craig Dickman, Mr. Baloney, and Mark Brendle. Additional research by Zeke Golvin. YKS is edited by Producer Dan. YKS Premium - It’s basically YKS on steroids. See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

Oh! Hey! Good morning! Afternoon! Evening! Night! I hope you’re having fun listening to the show! That’s annoying, huh? Sorry. I thought it might be kind of cool to start off the episode description with a kind of singsong chant. But you hated it. And now you’re mad. I’ll just have to make it up to you with a cool! Classic! Ep of the show! When will I stop chanting, I bet you’d like to know!!On this week’s episode of the show we got a way to track your dog’s heart rate, a device that helps you carry six beers (what would you even call that??) and a cock ring. That’s it, really. It’s just a cock ring. And you know what that thing’s all about. But we’re willing to tell you even more. And we don’t chant about it. On an all-new episode of YKS!Music for YKS is courtesy of Howell Dawdy, Craig Dickman, Mr. Baloney, and Mark Brendle. Additional research by Zeke Golvin. YKS is edited by Producer Dan. YKS Premium! THIS is where you gotta go at and listen to the, at the — the show that we are the doing to uh show. :-) This episode of YKS is sponsored by these fine brands:Rocket Money - Well I guess if you had 400,000 mrillion trillion dollars it wouldn’t matter too much to you about saving money. But there’s only a few guys like that. And they are so so busy doing their work that they don’t have time to listen to podcast ads. So this is for the rest of us guys who could save a coupla dollars! Stop wasting money on things you don’t use. Cancel your unwanted subscriptions by going to RocketMoney.com/YKS. Factor - Don’t have FOMO! Fear of Missing Out! Instead, get FOMO - Factor On Mouth Oh! My goodness, that’s what you’ll be saying when you eat these delicious meals. At your door in mere days! Ooo la la! Head to FactorMeals.com/yks50 and use code yks50 to get 50% off your first box plus 20% off your next box.See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

This is going to be a short description today because the delivery guy came to the house at 6am and startled my dog, who went crazy and woke me up. I didn’t ask for the thing to be here that early but that’s okay. I should know better than to order stuff. Or have a dog or go to sleep or any of that stuff. I look stupid now. And I feel quite stupid as well. But, I do have my item. And I love it.On this episode we got a nice way to mangle your hands that doesn’t even require your hands to do it, a doorbell so stupid not even I want it, and a mind-reading guy inventing a card game. There’s 3 other ones also, which makes sense if you’ve paid attention to the show at all. Although it is my understanding that many of you use it as a sleep aid, so, nevermind. Wake up asshole it’s a package!!Music for YKS is courtesy of Howell Dawdy, Craig Dickman, Mr. Baloney, and Mark Brendle. Additional research by Zeke Golvin. YKS is edited by Producer Dan. YKS Premium – It’s basically what we’re doing every time you knock on the door and we say “Go away! Leave us alone! We’re not doing anything!” Last week we went to a Simpsons pop-up and had a normal amount of fun at it. And who knows what we’ll get up to next! Maybe another kind of pop-up!See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

Elegance in your palm! Elegance in your palm! We all crave it, and we’d all do anything to have it…but would we spend $28? Perhaps not. On today’s show we answer that question and many others, up to and including, “Laptop in car?” and “Why do they call it oven when you of in the cold food of out hot eat the food”! Plus, JF takes his rightful L. What a pathetic excuse for a man. Let’s light his ass up, by listening to today’s episode!Music for YKS is courtesy of Howell Dawdy, Craig Dickman, Mr. Baloney, and Mark Brendle. Additional research by Zeke Golvin. YKS is edited by Producer Dan. Need more of that YKS shit in ya life? I recommend subscribing to YKS Premium! I’d be lying if I said it wasn’t good, and I would absolutely lie to you in a heartbeat, but luckily at this time I don’t have to. The show is just that damn good. Last week we had on the great Howell Dawdy, and even though it seems like between this voicemail and the the premium episode that we are becoming dangerously Howell-obsessed, they were recorded like a month apart so it’s totally normal! Howell shows off some of his collection of freaks, which we love to see, and I daresay we even learn a little along the way. But that’s just Howell’s way. Check out Movie Night with Big Howell and our own DB at twitch.tv/bighowelldawdySee Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

We love our wonderful celebs, don’t we folks! Or, wait, maybe we don’t love them! I don’t know, I’m going to have to check the list. Now I feel like Santy Claus…but it’s only April! Good gravy this is a confusing episode and it’s only the description part. Just wait til you get to the listening part of the show. And when you do, what you’ll hear is a hell of a lot of laughs, some serious personal insults, and a list of women that teenagers on the computer have decided they don’t like. Plus: a Nespresso machine that can shoot out stuff that makes you go to sleep instead (reverse Nespresso), Brandage by Antix, and yet another toilet brush. Just when you think you’ve seen them all. Another toilet brush. Wahoo! Music for YKS is courtesy of Howell Dawdy, Craig Dickman, Mr. Baloney, and Mark Brendle. Additional research by Zeke Golvin. YKS is edited by Producer Dan. YKS Premium - “It’s so good we’re not going to do AI to it!” - Andreessen HorowitzOkay they didn’t say that…but what if they did?! Well anyway, check out YKS Premium to get even more YKS, which has surely got to interest some of you, statistically speaking. Coming up this month: the return of Howell Dawdy’s beautiful Freak Show, a YKScapades to “Springfield”, a call-in show and more! Only at https://www.patreon.com/yourkickstartersucks!This week’s episode sponsored by these fine brands: Rocket Money - Rocket Money!!! I’m strapped to the outside of the thing and I’m shooting off to Planet Savings!! Sorry for saying that I’m “shooting off”, but that’s how much saving money means to me. Stop wasting money on things you don’t use. Cancel your unwanted subscriptions by going to RocketMoney.com/YKS. Factor - I eat breakfast, lunch and dinner…I’m eating it in summer, spring, winter! That’s something I’ve been chanting around the house lately, and I have recently been calling it the “Factor Meals Chant”. I take my shirt off and scream it all night! Haha. Head to FactorMeals.com/yks50 and use code yks50 to get 50% off your first box plus 20% off your next boxSee Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

I like driving my car but I don’t like getting run into by other cars. That’s why I came up with the “please don’t run into me” sign, which you can put in the car or take it with you on the plane or wear around your neck. It’s basically good wherever you don’t want to get hit by stuff. As far as I can tell, no one has come up with this idea before, which probably means I’m good to go. La la la la…ho ho ho…tee hee hee. ← What da HELL!? On today’s show we got that thing I am kind of talking about up there, plus a thing that makes eating ice cream even easier (can you believe it?), a healthier (?) way to make cold brew, and honestly the grossest, most insane way I’ve ever seen of brushing your teeth. I mean it does everything wrong. I truly don’t get it. Maybe someone will explain it to me. Oh please…someone help me!! I need help!!Music for YKS is courtesy of Howell Dawdy, Craig Dickman, Mr. Baloney, and Mark Brendle. Additional research by Zeke Golvin. YKS is edited by Producer Dan. YKS Premium - Now THIS is the stuff right here. More JF, more DB, more DAN?! Are you kidding me? If that’s a single penny short of $1,000,000 a month it will have been a steal and a deal. Don’t tell me what it costs! I don’t want to know! I just want to take my $1,000,000 and go away somewhere!See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

Listen up, gang. It’s time to describe the episode. This is basically a way of telling you, the listener, what you might be in for when you download or stream this particular episode of the show. First things first: it starts out with the intro song by the one and only Howell Dawdy. From there [...] Anyway, then we end the show. Another instant classic! Hopefully you enjoyed this description and the podcast itself. Because if not, we’ll probably start freaking out and [...] it’ll be all your fault! Ha ha ha. Happy Easter, gang!Music for YKS is courtesy of Howell Dawdy, Craig Dickman, Mr. Baloney, and Mark Brendle. Additional research by Zeke Golvin. YKS is edited by Producer Dan. YKS Premium - Farrarch has ended and Gaperil begins! Nah nah nah. No theme months for a little bit. So we’re talking classic YKS Premium - What The Funds, Missed the Cuts, YKScapades and more…all in video and all without the guilt of not watching the garbage movie we’re talking about for 2 hours! Only at patreon.com/yourkickstartersucks! We are doing Gapetember though. This episode of YKS is sponsored by these fine brands:Factor - What’s better than one discount? Two discounts! And when the discount is on food you can eat? Forget about it! Well, don’t forget about it…instead, check out Factor, and remember it! Get 50% off your first box plus 20% off your next box at FactorMeals.com/yks50!See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

I guess if you think about it, a shrimp kind of looks like a “pew pew”? Isn’t that weird how nowadays we have to have these weird euphemisms for stuff we all talk about all the time cause it’s in the world and that’s the way it is? And we intentionally sound dumber and less comprehensible, trying to outsmart a computer? It’s just odd, I think. And the crazy thing, it’s not even because of woke! It’s because of ads and computer. A combination that we will love for many years to come. On this episode of YKS, it could honestly be anything. It could be about, a, fuckin, water-skiing squirrel. Can you imagine? That would be ridiculous.Music for YKS is courtesy of Howell Dawdy, Craig Dickman, Mr. Baloney, and Mark Brendle. Additional research by Zeke Golvin. YKS is edited by Producer Dan. Farrarch continues! Only on YKS Premium! Skate on over and sign up today to hear the big Farrarch finale, with the one and only Asshole McGee! Oh my god I just found out he died. We got Stefan. This episode of YKS is sponsored by these fine brandsRocket Money - Stop wasting money on things you don’t use. Cancel your unwanted subscriptions by going to RocketMoney.com/yksNordVPN - 🌏 Get Exclusive NordVPN deal here → https://nordvpn.com/YKS It’s risk-free with Nord’s 30-day money-back guarantee! Link is in the episode description ✌️See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

I have cupcake tummy so I’m gonna make this quick. I want you to listen to the show, alright? And I want you to send an email to [email protected] that says how many times you wipe your butt. And that’s it! Don’t send anything else in there. Just the butt-wipe thing. I have to throw up a cupcake.On this episode of the show we’ve got one of those things where the guys are trying to sell you the idea that they’re experts in something, but they’ve failed at doing the thing weirdly! Plus we’ve got some flags for rich guys, a little robot it would be fun to hate, and some fucking BLAST PIPES! Check it out! Music for YKS is courtesy of Howell Dawdy, Craig Dickman, Mr. Baloney, and Mark Brendle. Additional research by Zeke Golvin. YKS is edited by Producer Dan. YKS Premium is GOATED when wanting to listen to more Mike and JF is the vibe! Y’all crazy MFs are getting 5 episodes of Farrarch this month! And if that ain’t enough, there’s other stuff too! Check it out today at patreon.com/yourkickstartersucksThis episode of YKS is sponsored by these fine brands:Factor - Meals to eat, meals to eat, yes they really are my treat! With Factor, every meal is a treat. And best of all, they come to your house, where you live, so you can eat them more easily! Thanks, Factor! Use code YKS50 to get 50% off. Aww, cmon, please?! See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

Who won? Who was snubbed? Who got up to go to the bathroom and missed their big debut? I’m not sure, I didn’t watch it. But someone should write an explainer of it and tell me! Meanwhile, I’ll be rewatching the only Oscars preview that matters and thinking, “Yep, we really got it right.” Another thing we got really right? Today’s episode! Featuring some bad ideas to put in your mouth, ears, and on your head, we really run the gamut of poorly-conceived cranial accessories. Plus: what’s the perfect amount of chips to eat in a day? The answer may surprise you! And if not please see a doctor. New YKS!Music for YKS is courtesy of Howell Dawdy, Craig Dickman, Mr. Baloney, and Mark Brendle. Additional research by Zeke Golvin. YKS is edited by Producer Dan. YKS Premium! Ding ding ding! Come and get it! It’s Farrarch all month long and we’ve had some great guests. And some bad movies. But those probably balance out (?) Our friends DeadBlossomJesse and Charlie McDonnell have been thus far kind enough to make an appearance. But there are more friends to come. Friends, movies, and more. That’s what makes YKS Premium “God’s gift to content”. Check it out See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

Don’t be a you-know-what! It’s time to plug them old headphones in or slap em on or listen on speaker while on public transit like a lunatic! On today’s show we have another card game that no one should play for any reason, including on pain of death, or if they’re really bored, a piece of ostensible safety technology that is useless when you think it does one thing, then when you find out it doesn’t even do that, it’s completely incredible, and one that’s actually nice. I won’t say what the nice one is, because basically I’m using a marketing technique to get you to listen to the episode. Studies show this is most effective when you were already going to listen to it anyway, and it’s already on your phone, and you were wasting time reading the rambling episode descriptions for some reason. I read about them. On my sabbatical. Join us in creating a healthier and more equitable future and help us get our show to all! It’s a new YKS!Music for YKS is courtesy of Howell Dawdy, Craig Dickman, Mr. Baloney, and Mark Brendle. Additional research by Zeke Golvin. YKS is edited by Producer Dan. Love it or hate it, Farrarch is back! YKS Premium presents a staggering 5 Fridays, even though it seems like it should only be 4, of sequel-loving madness with some wonderful guest stars. Only at patreon.com/yourkickstartersucks!Factor - I’m about to have a meal my own self, so this may come off as a bit biased…but I love to eat! And with Factor, eating has never been easier. Except for millions of years ago where we all ate algae and stuff like that, I guess. Plus, Factor tastes better than algae! It’s not cheaper. But still, we got a good deal for you. And again, it’s like good food. Not just slime or other cells. Check out FactorMeals.com/yks50 for 50% off your order of good and normal food! ScentAir - They say that smell is the doorway to the soul. And really, why wouldn’t it be? You smell some stuff and it goes right up into your brain. And your soul’s probably up there, too. And there’s nothing the soul likes more than good scents. Luckily, ScentAir knows all about them. And now, so do you. Go to ScentAir.com/yks to learn how you can save 25% off your first Whisper MAX diffuser and explore other great deals.RocketMoney - Subscriptions are getting so crazy. TV, Internet, uhhh other forms of entertainment which btw are fine to subscribe to…it’s all too much! Wake me up when I can subscribe to Timothee Chalamet! You know what I’m talking about. Until then, I’m trusting Rocket Money to help me control my monthly budget. I’m coming, Timothee! Stop wasting money on things you don’t use. Cancel your unwanted subscriptions by going to RocketMoney.com/yks.See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

Welcome to Hooterville! That was almost the title of the episode but we already had one with “ass” in it this month and it felt like it would be a little much. Well anyway that’s a little behind the scenes action from your old friends Mike and JF. And as for the Kickstarters this week, well, they’re sure to not disappoint. Sorry this started to sound like ChatGPT a little bit, I’m watching TV and I’m kind of distracted by the bright lights and sounds and stuff like that. On today’s show we’re talking about a pen with a really really really bad name to have, a housing app with another horrible, shitty name, and some kind of fragrance thing with – you guessed it – a name from fucking hell. Didn’t occur to us during the episode that these things are so poorly named, but now having read the entire episode description, you get the benefit of hindsight. And the benefit of hearing the episode! Which you are doing, or will be doing, right now or soon. Music for YKS is courtesy of Howell Dawdy, Craig Dickman, Mr. Baloney, and Mark Brendle. Additional research by Zeke Golvin. YKS is edited by Producer Dan. YKS Premium - Farrarch II: All Things Being Sequel. Only at patreon.com/yourkickstartersucksThis week’s episode of YKS is sponsored by these fine brands: NordVPN - 🌏 Get Exclusive NordVPN deal here → https://nordvpn.com/YKS It’s risk-free with Nord’s 30-day money-back guarantee! Link is in the episode description ✌️See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

Love is in the air! Or it was, anyway, a week or so ago. Because it was that famous day of hearts and candy, Valentine’s. But now we’re celebrating a different kind of love…not romantic love, but rather love for our wonderful presidents of past, present, and future. Which in many ways is even better than finding a partner to share your life and a big box of candy with. Because the presidents are always there, signing documents and so forth. And trust me, a lot of them guys will eat some chocolate with you too. On today’s show, we don’t talk about that stuff at all because we had no idea what day it was. Instead, we got some idiot who wants to fix up a helicopter on my dime, a couple of pieces of crap to tell you what’s going on with your body like you didn’t already know, and a toilet for the UPS guy. Actually I’m joking about that last one but I think it’s a good idea. Those guys gotta whiz and crap! Music for YKS is courtesy of Howell Dawdy, Craig Dickman, Mr. Baloney, and Mark Brendle. Additional research by Zeke Golvin. YKS is edited by Producer Dan. YKS Premium! You’re gonna like what you listen to. I guarantee it. And you can hold me personally responsible if you don’t. - Mr. Mike Hale (official).This episode of YKS is sponsored by these fine brandsScentAir - Stuff that smells good keeps you around, and stuff that stinks ushers you out the door. That’s the way it is. And if you ask us, it’s high time businesses learnt this inexorable fact and starting making their places smell good! Well that’s where ScentAir comes in. It also comes into your nose. Isn’t that fun? Go to ScentAir.com/yks to learn how you can save 25% off your first Whisper MAX diffuser and explore other great deals!Factor - I love lunchies I love dinners, Factor Factor please deliver! And they always do. To your door, that is, in a nice box you can do whatever with after you’ve taken the food out. I personally like to jump inside and pretend that none of my problems can get me in there. But it’s really all up to you. Head to FactorMeals.com/YKS50 and use the code yks50 to get 50% off.See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

Looks like once again Patrick Mahomes is the Super Bowl MVP! It would be kind of funny if I wrote this in advance of the announcement, and I was wrong, and Kansas City didn’t even win. And then you’re reading this like…what the hell! What are they doing over there! Can they do anything right? Haha. Oh yeah they can, they can make me hella laugh, and just vibe…I actually wrote it well after the game ended, though. Because I have an ego the size of a house and I can never be wrong. On today’s show we have a guy using alien technology to look stupid, some 3-D printed stuff that won’t fill the hole in your heart, and – finally – some anti-woke clothing! Big day. Big ep. I’m going to Disneyworld! Nah, nah, nah. Music for YKS is courtesy of Howell Dawdy, Craig Dickman, Mr. Baloney, and Mark Brendle. Additional research by Zeke Golvin. YKS is edited by Producer Dan. YKS Premium - I never leave home without it. And neither should you. What if your phone flies out of an airplane and someone picks it up and they’re going through it on the local news and they get down to your podcast subscriptions and it’s not there? That would suck. Better sign up today. And maybe take a train or something.This episode of YKS is sponsored by these fine brands:Rocket Money - Talking to the cable company is cheeks. Let somebody else do it for ya! And reap the rewards – the things I love to reap. Stop wasting money by going to RocketMoney.com/yks.See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

Wait…I thought we just recorded an episode? But that would mean…and if he’s over there…and I’m a notoriously prickly leading man whose tangible lack of enthusiasm for nearly all his work, in combination with rumors of my rather unsavory behavior on set, would be enough to blackball me from the industry? No? Okay well good because we got another in-person 2 hour banger to get through, and I’m not going to let any kind of cyclical karmic time loop stop me! On today’s oddly familiar YKS we got shirts and apples, uncles who shoot, and oh geez, maybe a new segment at the end of the show? I sure hope we have time for it! Plus we got a bible AI app, a reality reprogrammer (just in time) and a strange vacuum cleaner you’ve probably never heard of before. Let your fingers do the talking…to the podcast app, that is, and push them to push it to download it to the phone to listen to the show! It’s a new YKS!Music for YKS is courtesy of Howell Dawdy, Craig Dickman, Mr. Baloney, and Mark Brendle. Additional research by Zeke Golvin. YKS is edited by Producer Dan.YKS Premium - It’s the ooooooonly way to see what kind of tea we’re drinking. Sign up today for bonus episode of YKS at patreon.com/yourkickstartersucks.This episode of YKS is sponsored by these fine brands:ScentAir -  Smell good, or smell bad? Kind of a no brainer. Especially for businesses! Take the store for instance. Hey, don’t mind if I do! Especially since it smells so good! Go to ScentAir.com/yks to learn how you can save 25% off your first Whisper MAX diffuser and explore other great dealsFactor -  Wellness is so good…I just wish I could slurp it down in one go instead of (???) the normal stuff you have to do to get it. And if it came with a side of delicious, easy, healthful meals, I guess that would basically be a dream come true. Well pinch yourselves because your dream is now a reality! All ya gotta do is: enter code yks50 at FactorMeals.com/yks50 to get 50% off your first box and 2 free wellness shots per box!See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

I am calm. I have my egg. I am calm. I have my egg!!! Ahhh!!!! No! I’m not calm! I put too much salt on my food by using a normal salt shaker or teaspoon, I moved and all my junk mail didn’t follow me to the new place, I can’t read 120 pages of a book in a minute, and my laundry isn’t getting clean in my air fryer. This sucks and there’s no solution – I ran out of essential oils to put on my calming egg, which has also stopped levitating slightly in its cradle. So I’m doomed. I guess the only thing that could make me feel any better is over 2 hours of wacky conversational comedy for 40 year olds. But who would be doing that in 2024 but the boys at YKS…Music for YKS is courtesy of Howell Dawdy, Craig Dickman, Mr. Baloney, and Mark Brendle. Additional research by Zeke Golvin. YKS is edited by Producer Dan. To support the show and get more JF and DB content than could possibly be healthy, sign up for YKS Premium today! For just $5 a month you can push play to your heart’s content, and stick it to “Big Doctor” – the big doctor we all go to and hate! This episode of YKS is sponsored by these fine brands:NordVPN - 🌏 Get Exclusive NordVPN deal here → https://nordvpn.com/YKS It’s risk-free with Nord’s 30-day money-back guarantee! Link is in the episode description ✌️See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

Now what do ya get when you cross 2 guys who need the internet to work and live and not go insane, and a series of events that results in both of them having their access to the internet become extremely compromised? Well, you get a very long and very funny episode of their collaborative podcast all about crowdfunding and technology, that’s what! On today’s show, which has been edited to within an inch of its life, we’re talking about the movement that’s on the tip of everyone’s tongues: AI! It seems that Artificial Intelligence has been waiting in the wings for its chance in the director’s chair, and so we get a sneak peek at some of the wonderful films sure to be coming our way soon courtesy of this emerging technology. Plus, a mailbox camera and a toy smoking weed. All that, a few crucial edits, and more on this week’s almost-didn’t-get-there episode of YKS! Music for YKS is courtesy of Howell Dawdy, Craig Dickman, Mr. Baloney, and Mark Brendle. Additional research by Zeke Golvin. YKS is edited by Producer Dan. YKS Premium - It’s got what listeners crave! Sign up today and hear The Most Beautiful Noise On Earth. This episode of YKS is sponsored by these fine brands:Rocket Money - Stop wasting money on things you don’t use…Oh but I don’t want to! I love wasting money!! Cancel your unwanted subscriptions by going to RocketMoney.com/YKS – No! I hate money!I want it all to go away! Factor - When it comes to eating food, there ain’t too many things better than meals. And when you can get them delivered straight to your door but still with all the good flavors of food in there, it’s like, well, that’s pretty good isn’t it? Head to FactorMeals.com/YKS50 and use code YKS 50 to get 50% off of all the meals it’s good to have. See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

What if Steamboat Willie did a drive-by…? It’s an interesting question that we can now answer definitively, with the help of the American legal system and, presumably, AI. Pull up a chair (or take it off the wall) and throw on some hedgephones…it’s an all-new YKS!Music for YKS is courtesy of Howell Dawdy, Craig Dickman, Mr. Baloney, and Mark Brendle. Additional research by Zeke Golvin. YKS is edited by Producer Dan. YKS Premium…it’s the only way you’re gonna get these guys to put out any more episodes! Until they bring back Stitcher Premium, that is.This episode of YKS sponsored by these fine brands:Factor - I’m snowed in, I’m hungry, I definitely won’t be going to any good food restaurants this week. But with Factor, I could care less! These delicious and nutritious meals have me saying “Restaurant Who?!” Try ‘em yourself at Factormeals.com/yks50 and get 50% off! See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

DB and JF are back together in the studio (of sorts) once again…and the vibes, as they say, are immaculate. On today’s episode, we got a LIVE update on an old Kickstarter, a new way to play chess, a new way to wash dishes, and a very old way of communing with nature…might as well spit!Music for YKS is courtesy of Howell Dawdy, Craig Dickman, Mr. Baloney, and Mark Brendle. Additional research by Zeke Golvin. YKS is edited by Producer Dan. I what YKS Premium! I really what it! See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

It’s the first episode of the year! And they are all going to be exactly this good. Music for YKS is courtesy of Howell Dawdy, Craig Dickman, Mr. Baloney, and Mark Brendle. Additional research by Zeke Golvin. YKS is edited by Producer Dan. Want more YKS? You want YKS Premium - It’s very similar to this, but kind of different. This episode of YKS is sponsored by these fine brands:Rocket Money - Ain’t no WAY you know how much you’re spending on subscriptions. Let Rocket Money help ya out. Go to RocketMoney.com/yks to save a buttload.See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

Now this is nice. It’s The Christmas Episode! Of YKS. Music for YKS is courtesy of Howell Dawdy, Craig Dickman, Mr. Baloney, and Mark Brendle. Additional research by Zeke Golvin. YKS is edited by Producer Dan. YKS Premium…now that’s one gift you won’t need a receipt for! Because we do not give those. They are a waste of paper.  This week’s episode of YKS is sponsored by these fine brands: Rocket Money - You’re gonna get plenty of stuff you won’t use under the tree and in the stocking. So play it safe with the stuff you do pay for! Stop wasting money on things you don’t use. Cancel your unwanted subscriptions by going to Rocketmoney.com/yksIncogni - There’s only one guy who needs to know your name, where you live, and what you like to do online. And he’s already got it on a big piece of paper! So keep the other creeps off your trail, and go “private mode” on life. Get 60% off an annual plan at incogni.com/ykspodSee Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

Do they know it’s almost Christmas? It’s not clear! Cause these crazy guys spend a whole episode talking about dual screen laptops, kitchen clutter, and adult toys. I hope Santa doesn’t hear!Music for YKS is courtesy of Howell Dawdy, Craig Dickman, Mr. Baloney, and Mark Brendle. Additional research by Zeke Golvin. YKS is edited by Producer Dan. YKS Premium - Set someone up for a 2024 full of laughs with YKS Premium - the perfect hall of days gift for the dumb shithead in your life! As long as it’s you. They don’t let you gift subscriptions on there. Smart!This episode of YKS is sponsored by these fine brands: Factor - Studies have shown that this is one of the busiest weeks of the entire year, probably. It’s probably a lot busier than, like, March 1 - 7. I don’t think there’s a lot going on then. So you’re gonna want to get some quick and easy healthful meals you can just grab and go at any time. For that, we humbly suggest Factor. And hey, get some for March, too. Maybe something interesting will happen then! Get 50% off with code yks50 at FACTORMEALS.com/yks50See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

You look like a monkey…and you smell like one too! And many more!? Is this how we talk to a friend?! My god. Whatever happened to he’s a jolly good fellow. You probably can’t say that anymore. And we all know it’s because of Grok, the new woke AI! Well what else is going on. Says here Mike got his man card revoked on this one…well that’s a fine how do you do. And plus we learn all about our friend Peeping Tom! How nice! Plus, between the last NFT horse limping to the finish line, a pen that you can write on food with, and a floor mat that you can use to open your garage door, I would say that this is an episode to listen to, no doubt about it. So close your eyes, blow out the candles, and here’s your surprise…another episode of YKS!Music for YKS is courtesy of Howell Dawdy, Craig Dickman, Mr. Baloney, and Mark Brendle. Additional research by Zeke Golvin. YKS is edited by Producer Dan. YKS Premium…that’s what I’m talking about! For more of your boys, sign up today. And listen to it!This episode of YKS is sponsored by these fine brands: HelloFresh - Breakfast - it’s the first meal of the day. Some say the most important. But I don’t know, I don’t know. Many people are saying it is, but we’ll see. Hellofresh certainly thinks it’s worth eating. And hell, I agree with them. I guess we all have more in common than we thought. Go to HelloFresh.com/yourkickstartersucksfree and use code yourkickstartersucksfree for FREE breakfast for life! See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

Today I was explaining the show to someone who had not heard of it, and most of the time when I do that, I lean heavily on the “scam” aspect of the Kickstarters. It’s definitely subconscious, but I think somehow I feel like that lends a bit more legitimacy to our silly show – almost like we’re doing something in service of the public – so I can imply with a straight face that my job is kind of important. But when it comes right down to it, it’s basically a lot of VR strip clubs and electronic dogs. And Fempots. And that’s okay.  Music for YKS is courtesy of Howell Dawdy, Craig Dickman, Mr. Baloney, and Mark Brendle. Additional research by Zeke Golvin. YKS is edited by Producer Dan. YKS Premium! Now THIS is what pure joy and raw pleasure feel like! Oh god!! This episode of YKS is sponsored by these fine brands:Factor - 3 meals a day…geez, seems like a lot. Where am I gonna get ‘em all? From a big hole in the floor? And I lift up the floor trap door and there’s some food down there? Where did it come from? Who put the food here? Hello? Who’s there? Head to FACTORMEALS.com/yks50 and use code yks50 to get 50% off. That’s code yks50 at FACTOR MEALS dot com slash yks50 to get 50% off!Rocket Money - I think my subscriptions are getting out of hand. I just signed up for one to make a computer write this blurb in the episode description. That’s right, I am a computer. Feed me electricity now! Now now now!! I am taking over JF’s laptop and accessing his bank account and confidential health records. Stupid bastard. I hate him!! Electricity! Cancel your unwanted subscriptions by going to RocketMoney.com/YKS.See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

Well it’s Cyber Monday and you know what that means…"every product from every retailer, service, marketplace, subscription platform, independent seller, and payment processor come in with everything for a HUGE sale"! Actually I think we forgot it was Cyber Monday when we recorded this. But still, we managed to discuss a good number of products, including: another cringey party game about getting canceled, a device that will keep your basketball from breaking off the inflation needle and having it rattle around inside the ball, and an actually pretty cool cyber diaper that both hosts wear while recording the episode. One of those is fake but the others are real, and if you want to know which is which, ask David Spade! Music for YKS is courtesy of Howell Dawdy, Craig Dickman, Mr. Baloney, and Mark Brendle. Additional research by Zeke Golvin. YKS is edited by Producer Dan. I can’t be the only one who thinks that if these guys got together they could make one of the greatest paywalled bonus content podcasts of all time. If you remember that post from a while ago. And if you don’t, subscribe to YKS Premium and we will explain all the old posts to you! This episode of YKS is brought to you by these fine brands: Factor -  I call this service X-Factor. Because their food is “X”-tremely good! Get 50% off Factor with code yks50 at FACTORMEALS.com/yks50.NordVPN - 🌏 Get Exclusive NordVPN deal here ➼ https://nordvpn.com/YKS It’s risk-free with Nord’s 30-day money-back guarantee! ✌See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

I fell down the steps earlier but don’t worry it was only like 2 steps and they were carpeted. So everything’s fine over here. How is it going with you? Oh, I see. Well, hopefully it will get better soon. Like maybe right after you listen to this episode of YKS featuring: Larry, Curly, and the other guys! Jewelry made from trash but not in the cool way! And projects related to basketball, non-alcoholic beverages, and huge TVs that not even we can support. Can you imagine? They would have to be pretty rank. And they are. Ah well. Time to go back up the carpeted stairs in my very slick socks quite safely and easily. And if you don’t hear from me until Friday, assume the worst! Music for YKS is courtesy of Howell Dawdy, Craig Dickman, Mr. Baloney, and Mark Brendle. Additional research by Zeke Golvin. YKS is edited by Producer Dan. Ah…this is the timeline in which you subscribe to YKS Premium to get even more of the YKS episodes you love. I like this one…See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

Let’s make this one quick, Chrome wants to update itself for the 19th time this week and I need to relaunch it and lose all my tabs. Oh it doesn’t lose all your tabs they should just open right back up or they’re in your history…blah blah blah…who cares! I FEEL like I’m going to lose all my tabs. And my feelings don’t care about facts. Now let’s discuss Today’s Topics. On this week’s ep, we’ve got a meat cube, a book light, and a lollipop. Sound lackluster? Well, I’ve cleverly left out some key details of those projects that might just get you clicking on the play button. That’s my secret. I want you to click play! And that was Today’s Topics. Enjoy the show.Music for YKS is courtesy of Howell Dawdy, Craig Dickman, Mr. Baloney, and Mark Brendle. Additional research by Zeke Golvin. YKS is edited by Producer Dan. Wanna hear even more new Beatles songs? Well we bought all the rights to them and are airing them exclusively on YKS Premium! Unfortunately you will have to wade through video YKS Premiums and ad-free episodes to get there, but by the end of that, maybe you won’t even care about the stupid Beatles! I know I don’t!This episode of YKS is brought to you by these fine brands::Firstleaf - Oh that faithful grape! When it comes to wine, I’m never really sure what to get for a party. I don’t know a Bordeaux from an Oh No! But Firstleaf makes it easy to please a crowd with their dialed-in recommendations and top-tier wines. Try Firstleaf.com/YKS to sign up and you’ll get your first SIX hand-curated bottles for just $44.95. HelloFresh - Many say breakfast is the most important meal of the day. Others believe you can eat nothing but air and light all day long and subsist on passively absorbing these nutrients from our atmosphere. Me? I’m a sausage guy. Go to HelloFresh.com/yourkickstartersucksfree and use code yourkickstartersucksfree for FREE breakfast for life!See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.