You Make Sense

In this episode, Sarah breaks down the origins of idealization and infatuation, showing how these patterns are rooted in unresolved experiences and protective strategies. She explains why infatuation is not love, but a survival response that pulls you out of your adult self and into fantasy. Sarah shares what it takes to shift these dynamics through reparenting and parts work, so you can move from survival-based patterns into grounded, mutual connection. Episode Highlights: [00:00] Introduction [00:42] Why you idealize partners and become infatuated [04:28] How your threat detector drives attraction [08:03] The internal dynamics of “pedestal” relationships [11:03] Origins of idealization: fantasizing as a way to escape and self-protect [14:11] What infatuation feels like (and why it’s not love) [22:39] Reparenting, parts work, and accessing “adult you” in relationships [25:51] What healthy love looks like [29:35] Asking yourself what you’re actually looking for [31:15] Other areas where we put people on a pedestal (and learning to love yourself) [34:06] Question 1 - What is limerence in relationships, and why does it happen? [38:03] Question 2 - How do I stay authentic around people I admire without belittling myself? [43:16] Question 3 - What's the difference between narcissism and an avoidant attachment? Get on the Waitlist for Sarah’s 10-Week Program: Ready for tools to heal every area of your life? You Make Sense is a 10-week live program that goes far beyond these weekly podcast episodes to give you powerful somatic exercises and resources to address your nervous system, relationships, younger parts, purpose, boundaries, grief, and more! Click below to get on the waitlist for limited-time reduced pricing: https://bit.ly/sp-yms-waitlist Download Sarah’s FREE Workbook: Not sure where to get started with somatic healing? Sarah created a FREE trauma-informed workbook called "How To Gain Control Over How You Feel" to help you step toward a life filled with more freedom, ease, and empowerment. Click the link below to download: https://bit.ly/yms-sp-workbook Connect with Sarah on: Email Community - bit.ly/yms-sp-newsletter Instagram — instagram.com/sarahbcoaching Website — sarahbaldwincoaching.com Submit a Question: sarahbaldwin1.typeform.com/podcast Quotes: “Our system is essentially saying: If I can be chosen by the best person, or the most perfect person, or the shiniest penny, then maybe that means I’m lovable.” — Sarah Baldwin [0:01:38] “[Idealization and infatuation] occurs when we've had a younger part of us who wasn't chosen, who was abandoned, or who experienced love from a conditional place.” — Sarah Baldwin [0:01:54] “Someone who has done their work and is healthy in a relationship—they don't want to be put on a pedestal. Because when you're put on a pedestal, you are not actually seen and known.” — Sarah Baldwin [0:08:39] “Adult love is not infatuation.” — Sarah Baldwin [0:26:46] “When you actually love from Adult you, you are deeply able to take in the wholeness of that person.” — Sarah Baldwin [0:27:27]

Perceiving danger when we’re actually safe is one of the most prominent drivers of human suffering and the reason many of us are chronically dysregulated. Sarah will walk you through how to create internal safety by harnessing the power of your nervous system and discharging stored trauma, so the past can finally be resolved. Listen in to discover how to work with your nervous system to begin building the life you want. Episode Highlights: keep them short and to the point [00:00] Introduction [02:04] Experiencing regulation through safety [05:06] How unresolved trauma creates a lack of safety [12:53] Examples of over-coupling and what it means [17:24] Showing your nervous system that it’s safe [21:06] How childhood experiences affect romantic partnerships [26:38] A spiritual view of the freedom regulation brings [32:39] The antidote to lacking internal safety [37:13] Question 1 – When do I know if I should leave an overwhelming work situation? [47:54] Questions 2 – How can I make my home feel safe after a traumatic experience? [59:08] Questions 3 – Is it possible to feel safe during big life upheavals like divorce or betrayal? NOW ENROLLING — Join Sarah’s 10-Week Program: Ready for tools to heal every area of your life? You Make Sense is a 10-week live program that goes far beyond these weekly podcast episodes to give you powerful somatic exercises and resources to address your nervous system, relationships, younger parts, purpose, boundaries, grief, and more! Click below to join before the doors close on April 14th.https://bit.ly/sp-yms Take Sarah’s FREE Quiz: Feeling stuck in your life? Not sure where to start with somatic healing? Sarah’s free quiz, “What’s Keeping You Stuck,” will equip you with free tools and a personalized guide to better understand your nervous system specific to you. Click below to get started: https://bit.ly/yms-sp-quiz Connect with Sarah on: Email Community - bit.ly/yms-sp-newsletter Instagram — instagram.com/sarahbcoaching Website — sarahbaldwincoaching.com Submit a Question: sarahbaldwin1.typeform.com/podcast Quotes: “The experience of time becomes stunted when we experience those traumatic things, and it’s almost as if that experience is lodged in that moment in time.” — Sarah Baldwin [0:09:46] “Trauma is not a thing of the past, everyone. And overwhelming things aren’t a thing of the past either. They’re a thing of the perpetual present until they are resolved.” — Sarah Baldwin [0:12:40] “The language of the nervous system is show, not tell.” — Sarah Baldwin [0:18:47] “Anything that is not resolved from your earliest childhood experiences will be projected onto your adult romantic relationship.” — Sarah Baldwin [0:21:48]

Sarah walks through the foundations of somatic parts work, including the importance of nervous system regulation, differentiating from our parts, and anchoring into adult self. When we’re able to meet these young parts with empathy, safety, and genuine love, the protective roles you’ve likely carried for years can finally begin to soften. Listen in to discover why falling in love with your parts is a powerful path toward lasting healing. Episode Highlights: [00:00] Introduction [01:03] Focusing on the root issue, not symptoms [05:35] Tending to your parts without an agenda [12:53] An overview of parts work [16:17] How to differentiate from your parts [18:01] Getting to know your parts and falling in love with them [20:16] Unburdening protective parts from their role [24:30] Self-like parts and why they sound like adult you [29:27] Question 1 - What if I’m too anxious to have children? [34:55] Question 2 - Can I heal my nervous system while playing a new sport? [39:12] Question 3 - Why do physical symptoms return during trauma healing? [44:17] Question 4 - Why can I orgasm alone but not with a partner? RSVP for Sarah’s FREE Live Training: Ready to take the next step on your healing journey? Nervous System Starter Kit is a FREE, 75-minute live training to help you regulate your nervous system, understand your attachment style from a somatic lens, and get into the driver’s seat of your experience. Click below to save your spot (replay available for a limited time): https://bit.ly/sp-nssk Download Sarah’s FREE Workbook: Not sure where to get started with somatic healing? Sarah created a FREE trauma-informed workbook called "How To Gain Control Over How You Feel" to help you step toward a life filled with more freedom, ease, and empowerment. Click the link below to download: https://bit.ly/yms-sp-workbook Connect with Sarah on: Email Community - bit.ly/yms-sp-newsletter Instagram — instagram.com/sarahbcoaching Website — sarahbaldwincoaching.com Submit a Question: sarahbaldwin1.typeform.com/podcast Quotes: “If you try to continually treat symptoms without getting to what's underneath it, the symptom will just continue to arise.” — Sarah Baldwin [0:02:30] “The issue here is not that symptom, it's the protective part of you or the vulnerable part of you, [who] is suffering and struggling and doesn't feel that they are safe.” Sarah Baldwin [0:03:10] “In order to effectively do parts work, you have to be in the driver's seat of your nervous system. Not all the time, but you have to be able to access adult you.” — Sarah Baldwin [0:04:42] “By differentiating from our parts, we can fall in love with them. And that is the foundation of parts work. It doesn't work if you don't fall in love with these versions of you.” — Sarah Baldwin [0:20:17] “Love is the most powerful tool. It's the most powerful weapon that there is, and it is stronger than anything else.” — Sarah Baldwin [0:26:19] “My deepest wish for you isn't that those symptoms go away. My deepest wish for you is that you fall so deeply in love with these parts, that you set them free and that you see who you are as the parent to them, which is a miraculous, amazing being.” — Sarah Baldwin [0:28:21] Links Mentioned in Today’s Episode: Join the Waitlist for You Make Sense

In this episode, Sarah explains why we choose partners who poke at what still needs to be resolved. She breaks down how we unknowingly hold each other accountable for pain from the past, why conflict intensifies as love grows, and how to shift from opposing sides to the same team. When you understand what is actually happening in your nervous system, relationship struggles become an invitation to deeper repair and lasting connection. Episode Highlights: [00:00] Introduction [00:40] What it really means to become a team with our partner [01:53] Why early-stage relationships often feel easier [04:51] How the nervous system begins linking your partner to family [05:49] Ways we hold partners accountable for pain they did not cause [07:11] Relationship conflict is not always a sign that something is wrong [07:57] Why safe, loving relationships can feel threatening [12:55] How we end up on different teams [14:22] Healing the last 20% of unresolved wounds inside partnership [19:24] Why you marry your unfinished business [22:26] From swords of protection to swords of love [28:42] Pausing when triggered and turning toward younger parts [30:59] Advocating for younger parts and inviting your partner into repair [33:45] Question 1 - Is feeling guilt about sharing relationship struggles a trauma response? [43:44] Question 2 - How do I process ending a relationship driven by my protective parts? [54:45] Question 3 - How do I let go of fantasy and reconnect with my spouse? RSVP for Sarah’s FREE Live Training: Ready to take the next step on your healing journey? Nervous System Starter Kit is a FREE, 75-minute live training to help you regulate your nervous system, understand your attachment style from a somatic lens, and get into the driver’s seat of your experience. Click below to save your spot (replay available for a limited time): https://bit.ly/sp-nssk Take Sarah’s FREE Quiz: Feeling stuck in your life? Not sure where to start with somatic healing? Sarah’s free quiz, “What’s Keeping You Stuck,” will equip you with free tools and a personalized guide to better understand your nervous system specific to you. Click below to get started: https://bit.ly/yms-sp-quiz Connect with Sarah on: Email Community bit.ly/yms-sp-newsletter Instagram — instagram.com/sarahbcoaching Website — sarahbaldwincoaching.com Submit a Question: sarahbaldwin1.typeform.com/podcast Quotes: “Once we've done enough internal healing, we draw in a safe person, and you have to build your capacity for receiving the good.” — Sarah Baldwin [00:11:11] “Neuroscience confirms it for us that we are traveling [in] time anytime we're triggered, and in healing, what we're doing is we're becoming the warrior for the parts of us that are waiting for that resolution.” — Sarah Baldwin [00:17:36] “[Relationships are] supposed to be the fertile ground where together we can heal up the last 20% of both of our wounding. And that is a beautiful love story. That is what love is supposed to be.” — Sarah Baldwin [00:21:43] “The work that we're doing is about looking within, not pointing the finger out. So when I was able to do that, look within, that clued me into all this is hurting part, and without him poking at it, I would never be able to address that part.” — Sarah Baldwin [00:30:10] “What's not talked about enough is what actually happens in relationships. And because it's not talked about enough, we think that there's something very, very wrong; that we're struggling or having a problem in our relationship.” — Sarah Baldwin [01:00:36] “Every unresolved thing from your childhood attachment gets resolved in relationship. So the more that we can see we're not alone and normalize this, the more that we stop avoiding it in our relationships, and we can actually address it.” — Sarah Baldwin [01:00:49] Links Mentioned in Today’s Episode: Join the Waitlist for You Make Sense

This conversation unpacks why relationships feel so exposing, why discomfort isn’t a sign that something is wrong, and how true healing happens first within you. You’ll learn why feeling ‘unknown’ is often a protective strategy, how parts of you get siloed to survive connection, and how the gentle integration of your protective parts creates secure, intimate relationships. Sarah touches on powerful therapeutic tools that will help you to show up as your most authentic self. Episode Highlights: [00:00] Introduction [02:28] How nature embodies its wholeness [06:06] The feeling of being unknown in relationships [11:32] Why the nervous system silos us [13:05] How our caregivers pass on their unresolved trauma [18:20] The nervous system’s reaction to being contorted by caregivers [21:06] How siloing yourself disconnects you from who you are [23:36] Why romantic relationships are the hardest place to be ‘all of you’ [26:03] What getting into a safe relationship after trauma looks like [30:11] Leaning into the discomfort of growth [33:23] How to integrate your siloed parts in your romantic relationship [37:19] Healing within relationships and the power of interdependence [42:56] Why the healing process is the greatest love story [44:16] Question 1 – Why do I feel safer being myself with friends than with my partner? [50:00] Question 2 – Why do I struggle with rejection in romantic relationships? [55:13] Question 3 – How can I handle difficult and traumatic experiences somatically? Join the 3-Day Expansion Experience: Ready to get unstuck and break through stagnancy? Expansion Experience is packed with tangible, science-backed tools to help you manifest the life you want. Join Sarah for three live mornings of guided calls, somatic exercises, and daily integration worksheets. RSVP now for only $37: https://bit.ly/yms-sp-ee Download Sarah’s FREE Workbook: Not sure where to get started with somatic healing? Sarah created a FREE trauma-informed workbook called "How To Gain Control Over How You Feel" to help you step toward a life filled with more freedom, ease, and empowerment. Click the link below to download: https://bit.ly/yms-sp-workbook Connect with Sarah on: Email Community - bit.ly/yms-sp-newsletter Instagram — instagram.com/sarahbcoaching Website — sarahbaldwincoaching.com Submit a Question: sarahbaldwin1.typeform.com/podcast Quotes: “The really cool thing about the nervous system – [is] that it functions without you having to do much or think about much.” — Sarah Baldwin [0:10:51] “If I silo myself, what happens is [that] no one gets to know all of me. And that means that if they hurt me or if they abandon me or they choose not to be my partner, it will never feel the same as the excruciating pain of being a baby who’s not chosen.” — Sarah Baldwin [0:19:03] “In many ways, healing is coming back to this beautiful, embodied experience of what it is like to have that child-like wonder and innocence.” — Sarah Baldwin [0:23:16] “Romantic relationships are the hardest place to be all of you.” — Sarah Baldwin [0:23:53] “If you are with a safe person [who] loves you, they want to see you, they want to see more of you. Because that’s what safe, loving people do.” — Sarah Baldwin [0:35:38] Links Mentioned in Today’s Episode: Join the Waitlist for You Make Sense [YouTube] Join the Waitlist for You Make Sense [Spotify] Join the Waitlist for Nervous System Essentials [YouTube] Join the Waitlist for Nervous System Essentials [Spotify]

Through a grounded, somatic lens, Sarah explores how regulation expands our capacity, why safety must be communicated in a language your nervous system understands, and how slow, tolerable steps retrain your system to tangibly move toward your desires. If you’re ready to stop forcing change and start living the life meant for you, this conversation offers a practical path forward that is backed by science. Episode Highlights: [00:00] Introduction [00:58] The science of manifestation and rewiring for possibility [02:37] Chronic dysregulation can block manifestation [06:38] Regulation is the key to unlocking the life you desire [10:36] Why you can fantasize safely but struggle to take action [16:07] The hardest thing to step towards is often the thing you want most [21:24] Who is in the driver’s seat of your nervous system? [23:39] Roads of safety, familiarity, and deepest desires [30:29] Why affirmations and vision boards fail without somatic work [32:20] Show, not tell is the language of the nervous system [37:20] Working with your protective parts [38:58] Building capacity through slow, tolerable steps [43:49] Manifestation as incremental nervous system expansion [45:59] Question 1 - Why do I keep attracting unavailable or unsafe partners? [01:00:40] Question 2 - How do I feel safe being seen in my purpose? [01:07:29] Question 3 - Why doesn’t money seem to stick, even when I work hard? Join the 3-Day Expansion Experience: Ready to get unstuck and break through stagnancy? Expansion Experience is packed with tangible, science-backed tools to help you manifest the life you want. Join Sarah for three live mornings of guided calls, somatic exercises, and daily integration worksheets. RSVP now for only $37: https://bit.ly/yms-sp-ee Download Sarah’s FREE Workbook: Not sure where to get started with somatic healing? Sarah created a FREE trauma-informed workbook called "How To Gain Control Over How You Feel" to help you step toward a life filled with more freedom, ease, and empowerment. Click the link below to download: https://bit.ly/yms-sp-workbook Connect with Sarah on: Email Community - bit.ly/yms-sp-newsletter Instagram — instagram.com/sarahbcoaching Website — sarahbaldwincoaching.com Submit a Question: sarahbaldwin1.typeform.com/podcast Quotes: “If you are chronically dysregulated, there is no amount of desire or praying or meditating or positive thinking that's ever going to create the life that you're wanting.” — Sarah Baldwin [0:09:41] “The things that you want the most in life, the things that you're desiring to manifest the most, usually, are going to be the hardest things to step towards in your life.” — Sarah Baldwin [0:16:15] “The language of the nervous system is show, not tell, or somatics, you can think ‘the felt sense.’” — Sarah Baldwin [0:34:33] “When you are in safety, your nervous system rests. And if a nervous system can work very hard, it most certainly can rest. We just have to show [our nervous system] that it is safe to rest.” — Sarah Baldwin [0:35:56] “Everything we're talking about is based in science. So, if you want to manifest, you have to use science. And the more that I've done this work, personally and professionally, [I’ve seen] the overlap of science and spirituality. They're best buddies.” — Sarah Baldwin [0:36:43] “You know [that] you're onto something when it's the hardest thing to step towards.” — Sarah Baldwin [01:01:07] “The desire of your soul is meant for you. It's your healing that gets you there.” — Sarah Baldwin [01:06:16]

In this episode, Sarah explains how unhealthy shame forms, why unresolved anger resurfaces in safe relationships, and how we unknowingly build our lives around avoiding what once felt intolerable. She breaks down what it truly means to complete the stress response by building regulation, reconnecting with younger parts, and allowing the body to express the appropriate response it once inhibited. When the stress cycle is resolved, the lie of unworthiness dissolves. What remains is your innate capacity for strength and self-trust. Episode Highlights: [00:00] Introduction [01:16] Shame, anger, and unworthiness [04:57] Protective strategies we use to avoid shame and unworthiness [06:34] How “I am not enough” gets internalized in childhood [11:48] Shame as the internalization of trauma [13:45] Healthy shame versus unhealthy shame [22:52] How unresolved shame distorts your reactions [25:13] Healthy anger versus unhealthy anger [28:17] Why suppressed anger resurfaces in safe relationships [30:27] Key steps to resolving shame [33:53] Completing the incomplete experience [41:42] Question 1 - Why does rage from past assault still feel stuck in my body? [48:13] Question 2 - How do I know when a trauma cycle is truly complete? [52:50] Question 3 - Why does setting boundaries make me feel unloving? [57:00] Question 4 - What is the healthiest way to release anger toward my family? Get on the Waitlist for Sarah’s 10-Week Program: Ready for tools to heal every area of your life? You Make Sense is a 10-week live program that goes far beyond these weekly podcast episodes to give you powerful somatic exercises and resources to address your nervous system, relationships, younger parts, purpose, boundaries, grief, and more! Click below to get on the waitlist for limited-time reduced pricing: https://bit.ly/sp-yms-waitlist Download Sarah’s FREE Workbook: Not sure where to get started with somatic healing? Sarah created a FREE trauma-informed workbook called "How To Gain Control Over How You Feel" to help you step toward a life filled with more freedom, ease, and empowerment. Click the link below to download: https://bit.ly/yms-sp-workbook Connect with Sarah on: Email Community - bit.ly/yms-sp-newsletter Instagram — instagram.com/sarahbcoaching Website — sarahbaldwincoaching.com Submit a Question: sarahbaldwin1.typeform.com/podcast Quotes: “We have a primal human need for our caregivers, who brought us into the world, to love us, to choose us, and when they don't, it feels to that child like annihilation. Annihilation is worse than death. It feels like a fragmenting of us in a million pieces.” — Sarah Baldwin [0:09:04] “Shame is the internalization of what happened to us.” — Sarah Baldwin [0:11:54] “What does the internalization mean? It means I am taking the thing that they are projecting at me, and I am putting it, effectively, inside of my own body.” — Sarah Baldwin [0:13:19] “The meaning that I make is not that this thing that happens to me is bad, this abuse is bad, or this neglect is bad, or your criticism is bad; [it’s that] I’m bad. That's the meaning that is made from internalization.” — Sarah Baldwin [0:13:31] “We need to bring regulation to our nervous system. That's always the beginning of everything. Why? Because we have to build our capacity to hold the shame that was once too much for us to hold.” — Sarah Baldwin [0:30:42] “When we love our parts, we fall in love with them, that lie of unworthiness dissolves, and all that's left is what is actually true, that we are worthy and good and whole.” — Sarah Baldwin [0:40:01]

She explains how childhood roles such as becoming invisible, emotionally self-reliant, or overly responsible don’t just affect behavior; they shape attraction itself, quietly guiding who we choose and the dynamics we recreate. When these internal blueprints remain unchanged, relationships tend to repeat familiar dynamics rather than support true closeness. This conversation offers a grounded look at why feeling unseen persists in love and what it takes to change the pattern at its root. Episode Highlights:[00:00] Introduction[01:46] Why no single partner can meet every need[04:23] The importance of fullness of relationships beyond romantic partnership[07:46] Childhood experiences as the blueprint for adult relationships[09:01] The nervous system as the driver of attraction and partner selection[10:54] Early relational roles learned to maintain safety within the family system[12:30] How childhood invisibility becomes the script for adult relationships[19:19] Why insight alone does not change relational patterns[21:30] Rewriting the internal blueprint through reparenting younger parts[29:27] What healthy relationships require once healing begins[35:45] Loneliness, grief, and outgrowing familiar relational dynamics[38:39] Question 1 - How does childhood neglect lead to emotional emptiness?[44:55] Question 2 - Why do I keep feeling drawn to partners who are bad for me?[48:53] Question 3 - Why can healing feel lonely as relationships change? Get on the Waitlist for Sarah’s 10-Week Program:Ready for tools to heal every area of your life? You Make Sense is a 10-week live program that goes far beyond these weekly podcast episodes to give you powerful somatic exercises and resources to address your nervous system, relationships, younger parts, purpose, boundaries, grief, and more!Get on the waitlist for limited-time reduced pricing:https://bit.ly/sp-yms-waitlist Take Sarah’s FREE Quiz:Feeling stuck in your life? Not sure where to start with somatic healing? Sarah’s free quiz, “What’s Keeping You Stuck,” will equip you with free tools and a personalized guide to better understand your nervous system specific to you.Click below to get started:https://bit.ly/yms-sp-quiz Connect with Sarah on:Email Community - bit.ly/yms-sp-newsletterInstagram — instagram.com/sarahbcoachingWebsite — sarahbaldwincoaching.com Submit a Question:sarahbaldwin1.typeform.com/podcast Quotes:“We need a variety of people in our lives to feel fully seen and fully known.” — Sarah Baldwin [0:06:23]“The goal is that, whomever you choose as your life partner, that they have the ability to meet your primary needs, and [that] they want to meet them.” — Sarah Baldwin [0:06:56]“Our childhood experiences lay the blueprint for how we experience romantic relationships and how we show up in them, meaning what we think we have to be or what we have to do in order to be safe in relationship.” — Sarah Baldwin [0:07:54]“However your caregivers showed up with you, that is going to be the type of person that you pick in romantic relationship, until you do the internal healing work.” — Sarah Baldwin [0:08:12]“If you're not in the driver's seat of your nervous system, if you haven't done stuff to resolve the past, do you know who's actually picking your relationships? Your nervous system. That threat detector and your parts are picking.” — Sarah Baldwin [0:10:07]“You are powerful. You are not powerless. – But that young part that is stuck back in that experience, they were powerless, they were a victim. And your job is to travel back to them and give them what they never got. That is really empowering.” — Sarah Baldwin [0:23:40]“When I say healthy, it doesn't mean your partner's perfect. It doesn't mean that they are getting everything right. It means that they're willing and safe. That's really all we need. Somebody who's willing and safe.” — Sarah Baldwin [0:29:57]“In healing, you can't unsee what you see. You can't unknow what you know. And so as you see more the beauty of it, you can't unsee it, meaning you can't go backwards. And that's when grief comes up.” — Sarah Baldwin [0:53:57]“You are transforming when you heal, not into anything new, but you're coming back into who you actually are.” — Sarah Baldwin [0:54:10] Links Mentioned in Today’s Episode:Join the Waitlist for You Make SenseJoin the Waitlist for Nervous System Essentials

She introduces the concept of disconfirming experiences: small, embodied moments that gently teach the nervous system that the past is over and we’re free to embody a more full, expansive life. Through key nervous system tools and somatic principles, Sarah explores how safety is rebuilt and how freedom becomes possible as the body is shown, again and again, that it no longer has to protect in the same ways. Episode Highlights:[00:00] Introduction[01:50] Why healing requires lived experience, not just understanding[06:30] Your nervous system holds the blueprint for how you navigate life[10:25] Unresolved experiences live in the body, not the prefrontal cortex[14:07] Using disconfirming experiences to teach your nervous system safety[22:14] How healing expands your capacity to receive[27:05] Becoming best friends with your autonomic nervous system[33:16] Aligning growth and healing with the season of life you’re in[37:54] How disconfirming experiences differ from exposure therapy[42:16] Question 1 - Why do I still feel dysregulated after years of nervous system work?[45:33] Question 2 - Why am I attracting unsafe or unsupportive partners?[51:46] Question 3 - How do I process trapped energy using somatic practices? Get Started with Nervous System Regulation:Ready to make tangible shifts in your life? Sarah’s brand-new introductory course, Nervous System Essentials, will equip you with science-backed tools to regulate your nervous system, so that you can experience more freedom and ease in your daily life. Join the course for only $67: bit.ly/sp-nse Take Sarah’s FREE Quiz:Feeling stuck in your life? Not sure where to start with somatic healing? Sarah’s free quiz, “What’s Keeping You Stuck,” will equip you with free tools and a personalized guide to better understand your nervous system specific to you. Click below to get started:https://bit.ly/yms-sp-quiz Connect with Sarah on:Email Community - bit.ly/yms-sp-newsletterInstagram — instagram.com/sarahbcoachingWebsite — sarahbaldwincoaching.com Submit a Question:sarahbaldwin1.typeform.com/podcast Quotes:“All of the hard things we experienced in our lives were not things we read in a book. They were lived experiences. So, do you know what that means? In order to heal the past, we have to have lived experience.” — Sarah Baldwin [0:02:51]“Only when we are in our state of regulation do we have full access to our prefrontal cortex and reason, logic, and rationalization. So did you know that when you experience hard things or traumatic things, you are not in your ventral vagal complex, or state of regulation.” — Sarah Baldwin [0:11:52]“It is not physiologically possible to resolve hard things and traumatic things when we experienced them in our bodies in the first place. We can't resolve them through talking them out.” — Sarah Baldwin [0:12:54]“A disconfirming experience is where we show, not tell, our nervous system and our younger parts, that the things that were once dangerous are safe for us.” — Sarah Baldwin [0:14:38]“Your autonomic nervous system is the best friend you never knew you had. – Because what neuroscience shows us is [that] this nervous system, it has never left your side. It has never stopped working for you. It will do everything in its power to make sure that you stay safe.” — Sarah Baldwin [0:28:57] Links Mentioned in Today’s Episode:Join the You Make Sense Waitlist – https://programs.sarahbaldwincoaching.com/you-make-sense-waitlist

She goes on to explain the differences between codependency, enmeshment, attunement, and interdependence. Sarah also discusses how fear of conflict can lead to self-abandonment, what it takes to feel safe during moments of disconnection or disagreement, and how to support children through distress in ways that build resilience. Tune in to better understand your relational patterns and learn how reclaiming a sense of self supports healthier, more sustainable relationships. Episode Highlights:[00:00] Introduction[01:23] Today’s topic: how not to lose yourself in a relationship[04:53] How childhood experiences shape our adult lives[08:39] What does it mean to have a codependent part?[11:48] Why your primary needs are essential and how to build capacity for them[15:10] How caretaking can create a false sense of safety[16:58] Signs you might be in a codependent dynamic[19:16] Other protective parts of codependency: the rescuer[22:13] Avoidance can show up in the form of caretaking[23:24] Diffuse boundaries and how they also impact parenting[26:41] The ramifications of and antidote to survival-based relationships[32:13] Characteristics of a healthy relationship[33:51] How to step toward interdependence[39:05] Question 1 - The difference between codependency, enmeshment, and attunement.[49:12] Question 2 - How to overcome the fear of conflict[58:08] Question 3 - Supporting a child through distress or challenging situations Get on the Waitlist for Sarah’s 10-Week Program:Ready for tools to heal every area of your life? You Make Sense is a 10-week live program that goes far beyond these weekly podcast episodes to give you powerful somatic exercises and resources to address your nervous system, relationships, younger parts, purpose, boundaries, grief, and more!Click below to get on the waitlist for limited-time reduced pricing:https://bit.ly/sp-yms-waitlist Download Sarah’s FREE Workbook:Not sure where to get started with somatic healing? Sarah created a FREE trauma-informed workbook called "How To Gain Control Over How You Feel" to help you step toward a life filled with more freedom, ease, and empowerment.Click the link below to download:https://bit.ly/yms-sp-workbook Connect with Sarah on:Email Community - bit.ly/yms-sp-newsletterInstagram — instagram.com/sarahbcoachingWebsite — sarahbaldwincoaching.com Submit a Question:sarahbaldwin1.typeform.com/podcast Quotes:“The thing that reminds your nervous system the most of [a] romantic relationship is your earliest childhood experiences. That lays the blueprint, or foundation, or map for how you had to navigate relationships.” — Sarah Baldwin [0:06:22]“You cannot rescue anybody else. Only they, their adult self, can rescue the younger parts of [themselves].” — Sarah Baldwin [0:20:43]“The amount of hard you experience in your childhood relationally is going to be reflected in the amount of hard that needs to get resolved in your romantic partnership.” — Sarah Baldwin [0:35:39]“If you want to avoid burnout, if you want to avoid getting overwhelmed by your client load and the work that you do, it is very important that you are functioning not from a place of codependency but interdependence.” — Sarah Baldwin [0:47:26]

Limiting beliefs are often not representative of who you are today but are self-protective mechanisms that formed as a result of past traumas or experiences. The good news is that it’s absolutely possible to shift this! Sarah will guide you through how to anchor into regulation and your adult self so that you can find more ease, peace, and confidence. Tune in for a somatic approach on how to change unwanted thought patterns. Episode Highlights:[00:00] Introduction[01:11] Origins of limiting beliefs[04:45] The 2 reasons limiting beliefs exist: unresolved trauma and fragmented parts[10:17] The stories your fragmented parts tell you and how they fuel your limiting beliefs[14:00] Why mindset work and traditional therapy alone can’t change your thoughts[15:03] The four states of your autonomic nervous system[20:32] How coming into a state of regulation changes limiting beliefs[24:15] Why you also need to work with your parts to change your thoughts[30:50] Question 1 - Understanding the link between your parts and nervous system[33:51] Question 2 - Why protective parts can block us from success[37:51] Question 3 - The connection between dreaming and your parts Get on the Waitlist for Sarah’s 10-Week Program:Ready for tools to heal every area of your life? You Make Sense is a 10-week live program that goes far beyond these weekly podcast episodes to give you powerful somatic exercises and resources to address your nervous system, relationships, younger parts, purpose, boundaries, grief, and more!Click below to get on the waitlist for limited-time reduced pricing:https://bit.ly/sp-yms-waitlist Take Sarah’s FREE Quiz:Feeling stuck in your life? Not sure where to start with somatic healing? Sarah’s free quiz, “What’s Keeping You Stuck,” will equip you with free tools and a personalized guide to better understand your nervous system specific to you.Click below to get started:https://bit.ly/yms-sp-quiz Connect with Sarah on:Email Community - bit.ly/yms-sp-newsletterInstagram — instagram.com/sarahbcoachingWebsite — sarahbaldwincoaching.com Submit a Question:sarahbaldwin1.typeform.com/podcast Quotes:“Human beings clock something as true if we can feel it.” — Sarah Baldwin [0:11:57]“I cannot believe something to be true if there isn’t the appropriate affect attached to it.” — Sarah Baldwin [0:14:08]“Your autonomic state within your nervous system creates your story or the thoughts that you are having.” — Sarah Baldwin [0:14:33]“When you’re in regulation, this is the fertile ground for creating new neural pathways for what’s actually true [and for] positive thinking.” — Sarah Baldwin [0:23:01]

Learning how to heal through your living can feel challenging or unfamiliar, especially if we’ve primarily found safety inside therapeutic containers, but it is also a necessary part of fully embodying the life you are here to live. You’ll get tangible tools to step toward your desires, receive abundance without suffering, and find support as you continue to grow. Wherever you are on your healing journey, this episode will show you just how much is possible for you. Episode Highlights:[00:00] Introduction[01:25] Today’s topic: post-traumatic growth[03:45] Why you may struggle to navigate healing through living[11:46] Building your ‘house of healing’[14:59] What to expect as you start to live fully[21:26] Why suffering isn’t necessary to receive abundance[23:59] The importance of having support through healing[25:28] Question 1 - How do I take action once I know my truth?[29:24] Question 2 - Why has it been so challenging to start my business?[35:15] Question 3 - How do I tend to my parts as I take steps in my purpose? Get Started with Nervous System Regulation:Ready to make tangible shifts in your life? Sarah’s brand new introductory course, Nervous System Essentials, will equip you with science-backed tools to regulate your nervous system, so that you can experience more freedom and ease in your daily life. Join the course for only $67: bit.ly/sp-nse Download Sarah’s FREE Workbook:Not sure where to get started with somatic healing? Sarah created a FREE trauma-informed workbook called "How To Gain Control Over How You Feel" to help you step toward a life filled with more freedom, ease, and empowerment. Click the link below to download:https://bit.ly/yms-sp-workbook Connect with Sarah on:Email Community - bit.ly/yms-sp-newsletterInstagram — instagram.com/sarahbcoachingWebsite — sarahbaldwincoaching.com Submit a Question:sarahbaldwin1.typeform.com/podcast Quotes:“A lot of our healing comes from our living.” — Sarah Baldwin [0:02:01]“Good things don’t always feel good at first because our nervous system doesn’t know them.” — Sarah Baldwin [0:04:40]“Transforming into anything new means a loss of something else. So, really [take] the time to be with that and not rush the process.” — Sarah Baldwin [0:18:06]“The depths of your suffering equate to the depths of aliveness you get to experience in life, and so, the deeper the suffering, when you heal that, the deeper the ecstasy of just breathing is.” — Sarah Baldwin [0:20:41]“Your learning was in and through [your] suffering, and now your learning is in your living.” — Sarah Baldwin [0:22:49] Links Mentioned in Today’s Episode:Join the Waitlist for You Make SenseJoin the Waitlist for Navigating Your Nervous System

Sarah explains how romantic relationships poke at early our attachment wounding the most, often leaving us reacting from old survival patterns rather than responding to what is happening in the present. She introduces the metaphor of the relationship as a battlefield versus a garden, showing how conflict, blame, and shutdown arise when unresolved wounds take the lead, and what becomes possible when both people reorient toward growth, responsibility, and care.This episode invites listeners to see relationships as a shared, living process that can heal the past and support deeper connection when tended with awareness and willingness. Episode Highlights:[00:00] Introduction[01:30] The myth that romantic relationships should feel effortless[05:26] Moving from self-focus to being relationally-focused[07:46] The role of willingness and self-growth in partnerships[09:20] Tending the relationship as a shared garden instead of a battlefield[15:38] How the nervous system projects childhood experiences onto our partner[17:51] Why we are drawn to partners who mirror our unfinished business[22:46] How understanding our parts and reparenting them supports relational repair[27:49] Building empathy by recognizing our partner’s parts and core wounds[31:02] Honoring difference and celebrating stretching[40:23] What becomes possible in relationships when both people are willing[43:15] Question 1 - Differentiating anxiety from truth in romantic relationships[55:59] Question 2 - Working with longing, loneliness, and unmet needs for connection[01:02:14] Question 3 - Learning to approach connection slowly RSVP to Sarah’s FREE Live Training + Q&A Series:Ready to take the next step with nervous system healing? Join Sarah for “Unlock the Life You Desire,” a 2-part somatic healing series to help you experience more joy and aliveness, and step toward the purpose that’s calling you.Click below to save your spot (limited time replays available!):http://bit.ly/sp-live-trainingNavigating Your Nervous System is NOW ENROLLING:Want to work with Sarah in a live capacity? The doors are now open to her 6-week live program, Navigating Your Nervous System, designed to help you get into the driver’s seat of your experience and start feeling better on a daily basis. Click below to learn more:https://bit.ly/sp-nyns Connect with Sarah on:Email Community - bit.ly/yms-sp-newsletterInstagram — instagram.com/sarahbcoachingWebsite — sarahbaldwincoaching.com Submit a Question:sarahbaldwin1.typeform.com/podcast Quotes:“Romantic relationships are where so much of our growth and healing happen, and that means that they aren't just filled with ease, they're filled with work.” — Sarah Baldwin [0:04:48]“Any garden can be transformed if both people are willing.” — Sarah Baldwin [0:13:33]“We marry our unfinished business, or we get into relationship with our unfinished business.” — Sarah Baldwin [0:18:28]“We are punishing our partner for everything our caregivers got wrong, and our partner wasn't there for any of it.” — Sarah Baldwin [0:26:49]“The only person that can rescue your parts is you.” — Sarah Baldwin [0:27:45]“Romantic relationships are supposed to be an invitation into our wholeness.” — Sarah Baldwin [0:30:39]“Our protective parts won't be open to letting us love again if they don't think that we can hold the aftermath of losing love.” — Sarah Baldwin [0:58:40]

In this episode of You Make Sense, Sarah unpacks how dysregulation can lead us to feeling behind in life or that we’ve missed our chance to have the relationships, purpose, and community we desire. You’ll learn about your three states of self-protection and why anchoring into regulation is the key to shifting how you experience time. By harnessing the power of your nervous system, it’s possible to move forward with more ease, patience, and empowerment. Episode Highlights:[00:00] Introduction[01:30] Understanding how we orient to time[02:37] Anchoring in regulation helps us perceive what’s actually true[06:30] Time from your sympathetic nervous system[12:35] Time from your dorsal vagal complex[14:24] Time from your blended state of freeze[14:55] Our experience of time when aligned vs. misaligned[21:31] Why we compare ourselves to others[28:55] Connecting to presence and the truth of our unfolding[31:15] Question 1: Muscling through versus getting out of your comfort zone[36:29] Question 2: How to start healing even when you’re in chronic stress[41:13] Question 3: Being patient while you are healing RSVP to Sarah’s FREE Live Training + Q&A Series:Ready to take the next step with nervous system healing? Join Sarah for “Unlock the Life You Desire,” a 2-part somatic healing series to help you experience more joy and aliveness, and step toward the purpose that’s calling you. Click below to save your spot (limited time replays available!): http://bit.ly/sp-live-training Download the FREE Workbook:https://bit.ly/yms-yt-workbookhttps://bit.ly/yms-sp-workbook Connect with Sarah on:Email Community - bit.ly/yms-sp-newsletterInstagram — instagram.com/sarahbcoachingWebsite — sarahbaldwincoaching.com Submit a Question:sarahbaldwin1.typeform.com/podcast Quotes:“Our nervous system is creating our entire experience, including how [we] perceive the movement of time.” — Sarah Baldwin [0:01:47]“None of us pick [the] right life when we are choosing from survival.” — Sarah Baldwin [0:08:33]“No one is on the path of life that you are on besides you.” — Sarah Baldwin [0:11:33]“Living happens only in this moment in time, and that means it only happens when we’re in regulation.” — Sarah Baldwin [0:23:59] Other Links Mentioned in This Episode:https://programs.sarahbaldwincoaching.com/navigating-your-nervous-system

Sarah breaks down how the autonomic nervous system shapes your entire lived experience, using clear metaphors to explain why you may feel blocked from the relationships, purpose, and opportunities you long for. She shares why the nervous system responds to what you show it (somatically), not what you tell it, and how regulation helps create the internal conditions for growth and fulfillment.The episode closes with questions about finding purpose, knowing when to push versus pause, and navigating fear during big transitions. Join Sarah to learn how small, steady capacity-building steps can help you move toward the life you long for with more trust, clarity, and ease. Episode Highlights:[00:00] Introduction[01:11] Why effort and willpower alone aren’t enough[05:03] Your nervous system creates your entire experience[11:29] Healing unresolved experiences is how we create the life we desire[15:04] Why our deepest desires are often an invitation into our healing[20:47] The power of nervous system regulation[25:23] Simple ways to build the capacity in your nervous system[31:00] Using parts work to build trust with your younger parts[0:36:27] The importance of walking, and not sprinting, toward the life you want[0:43:06] Question 1: Tools for how to figure out your purpose[0:56:05] Question 2: Pushing through discomfort versus slowing down[1:03:03] Question 3: Consistent regulation during fear or uncertainty at work Join the Waitlist for Navigating Your Nervous System:Living a full, expansive life starts with nervous system regulation. If you’re looking for practical tools and support on your healing journey, you can now get on the waitlist for my upcoming 6-week LIVE program. Everyone on the waitlist receives access to limited-time pricing:https://bit.ly/sp-nyns-waitlist Take Sarah’s FREE Quiz:Feeling stuck in your life? Not sure where to start with somatic healing? Sarah’s free quiz, “What’s Keeping You Stuck,” will equip you with free tools and a personalized guide to better understand your nervous system specific to you. Click below to get started: https://bit.ly/yms-sp-quiz Connect with Sarah on:Email Community - bit.ly/yms-sp-newsletterInstagram — instagram.com/sarahbcoachingWebsite — sarahbaldwincoaching.com Submit a Question:sarahbaldwin1.typeform.com/podcastQuotes:“No amount of energy, no amount of focus, of pushing, of grinding is going to get us the life we’re desiring. It can work to a degree, but we do reach a point where the fullness of life that we want cannot be found on that treadmill.” — Sarah Baldwin [0:02:46]“What we have to do is we have to learn to speak the language of our nervous system and begin letting it know in a way that it understands that the life we want is actually safe for us.” — Sarah Baldwin [0:11:16]“Your nervous system does not want to be working so hard. When you are in dysregulation, it is working very hard; it wants to rest. Resting is the doors opening, but it needs to know you're safe.” — Sarah Baldwin [0:29:33]“What we have to do is begin becoming the primary protector of our vulnerable parts.” — Sarah Baldwin [0:32:04]