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The Psychology of your 20s

The Psychology of your 20s

419 episodes — Page 7 of 9

126. How to heal a fear of abandonment

Many of us battle with a deep-rooted fear and anxiety that those we love will leave us. Maybe we have been hurt in a past relationship, or witnessed a messy divorce or the passing of ones we love and we have unconsciously learned to associated vulnerability, intimacy and love with pain and disappointment. This fear of abandonment can cause us to sabotage otherwise perfectly healthy relationships or to push people away out of an irrational fear they will leave us, only to end up just as alone as if they had. In this episode we explore the following: What is the root cause of the fear of abandonment? The different types of abandonment reactions - the saboteur, the clingy, the avoidant and the serial dater Links to codependency and emotional unavailability How to heal our abandonment wounds We all want to accept others into out lives and trust the people we love will stay by our side so if you're struggling with an irrational fear or anxiety of abandonment, listen now. Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/thatpsychologypodcast/ If you enjoy this content, please consider subscribing to my Patreon: https://www.patreon.com/ThePsychologyofyour20s See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

Sep 15, 202346 min

125. The psychology of dating apps ft. Bumble

The new reality of dating in your 20s is that the majority of us who are single are on the dating apps. Tinder, Hinge and Bumble have completely changed how we approach dating by expanding our options, making dating convenient and accessible and are increasingly becoming the way many of us meet our partners. A study conducted by the Pew Research Centre found that almost half of us between 18 and 29 have used a dating app. Yet, this has also transformed a lot of our offline behaviours towards dating. In this episode we break down the psychology behind dating apps including: The impact of choice overload The psychology behind our romantic preferences The scarcity effect Seeking validation through dating apps Dopamine and swipe based dating Dealing with rejection and dating app burnout We are also joined by the wonderful Lucille McCart from Bumble who discusses how we can use dating apps to their full potential in our 20s. She explains how we can convert our online matches into real world connections, why you should be the one asking people on dates and the benefit dating people outside of your 'type'. All of that a more. Listen now. Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/thatpsychologypodcast/ Patreon: https://www.patreon.com/ThePsychologyofyour20s See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

Sep 11, 202354 min

124. Moving to a new city in our 20s

A lot of us in our 20s feel the urge to upend everything and move to a new city - maybe for work, for a partner or just for the pure adventure of a new experience and environment. So in this episode we're going to break down why our 20s are perhaps the best time to make this major life change, from the lack of external responsibilities to the psychological benefits it brings, including self reflection, promoting a growth mindset and realising our ideal selves. We'll also explore why the urge to move to a new city really reflects our innate novelty seeking behaviour and why some people, the so called 'serial movers', can never seem to stay in one place for long. And finally, what are some of the practical ways we can actually do this and build community, maintain financial security, avoid feeling isolated? And what exactly is the so-called '6 month' rule? All of that and more, listen now! Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/thatpsychologypodcast/ Patreon: https://www.patreon.com/ThePsychologyofyour20s See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

Sep 8, 202340 min

123. A life update - healthy love, moving overseas, dealing with online criticism

It's been a while since my last life update so I thought we would take a bit of a breather and sit down for a nice chatty episode, just for you all the loyal podcast listeners, discussing all the recent changes and surprises that have been transpiring in my life as of late. From discovering what a healthy relationship looks like after years of tragic dating stories, the end of my single era, to moving to NYC and writing a book (!!!) there is so much to cover, alongside answering some of your burning questions. Listen now! Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/thatpsychologypodcast/ Patreon: https://www.patreon.com/ThePsychologyofyour20s See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

Sep 5, 202350 min

122. The pressure to be exceptional in our 20s

Increasingly, those of us in our 20s are facing an exceeding pressure to be exceptional and have a million accomplishments and accolades under our belt. If we are not successful, what are we worth? Examples like the Forbes 30 under 30, the wunderkind phenomena and young success stories all make us feel like we're not achieving enough or are falling behind. Today we're going to break down exactly why we feel this way, using theories around self determination, observational learning and social comparison. We'll also examine how we can break away from our need to be defined by our successes using practices like mindfullness, examining our online persona and capturing delight to use our 20s to explore rather than excel. Listen now! Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/thatpsychologypodcast/ Patreon: https://www.patreon.com/ThePsychologyofyour20s See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

Sep 1, 202336 min

121. Befriending your social anxiety

Each of us deals with feelings of embarrassment, awkwardness and feeling social self conscious every now and then. But social anxiety can cause us a level of emotional, mental and physical discomfort that disrupts out ability to build authentic connection and can hold us back. In this episode we break down the psychology of social anxiety, particularly deconstructing the belief that everyone is judging us or that the opinions of others matter. We look at the distinction between everyday anxiety and a social phobia, the links to perfectionism and overthinking and methods for managing our social anxiety including the "so what" mentality and treating our anxiety like excitement rather than fear to allow us to pursue social authenticity over perfectionism. All that and more, listen now! Subscribe to my Patreon to support the show: https://www.patreon.com/ThePsychologyofyour20s My Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/thatpsychologypodcast/ See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

Aug 29, 202336 min

120. Understanding your ego

In this week's episode we discuss the psychology of your ego and what its trying to tell us! Ego can feel nasty and entitled but it comes from a place of deep insecurity that we need to unpack before we can truly understand ourselves. We look at the 6 signs your ego is in control, where ego comes from and how to replace it with self esteem and humility. We also discuss why ego and self confidence are different things even though they sometimes look similar: how ego is insecure, inconsistent and relies on the perceived inferiority of others whilst confidence is stable, sure and kind. Remember, you are not your ego so in this episode we talk how to rein it in, accept it as part of who we are and move forward. Listen now. My Patreon: https://www.patreon.com/ThePsychologyofyour20s My Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/thatpsychologypodcast/ See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

Aug 24, 202341 min

119. How to make the most of your 20s pt.2

Love, dating and friendships can feel like a black box in our 20s when we're trying to make the most out of our formative years. None of us have the answers or a guide to some of our biggest questions - how do I actually make new friends, how many friends should I have, should I be settling down this early or exploring my options? In part two of this series we breakdown how to make the most out of our personal relationships during this decade. We discuss why your answer should always be 'yes', why quantity over quality may actually be more correct when it comes to friendships in our 20s and the benefit on getting our heart broken and loving as deeply as possible during this period. We also cover my 7 tips for personal growth to make the most out of this decade, from letting go of our ego to taking time to uncover our childhood wounds, as well as the power of just having a laugh at yourself every now and then. All that and more, listen now! Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/thatpsychologypodcast/ Patreon: https://www.patreon.com/ThePsychologyofyour20s See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

Aug 22, 202350 min

118. How to make the most of your 20s pt.1

How do we actually make the most of our 20s? Career anxiety, feeling stuck, taking risks and managing our money (do we spend or save) are all big concerns we have in this period. So how do we manage these dilemmas and choices to create our dream life in our 20s, and what does that dream life even look like? In part one of our mini series, we examine the major decisions we make during this decade around our future and how we can approach them to get the best outcome. We discuss the importance of taking risks, moving to a new city, quitting your terrible job and trying as many things as possible. We also talk money, dymystifying some of the stigma around how people in their 20s are actually spending their money and why you should be spending on experiences rather than temporary things. Listen now! Part two out Friday! Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/thatpsychologypodcast/ Patreon: https://www.patreon.com/ThePsychologyofyour20s See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

Aug 22, 202347 min

117. The psychology of trauma ft. Dr MC McDonald

Trauma seems like a bit of a black box at times, something that we all experience as part of our life journey as humans but surrounded by a lot of misinformation. In this episode, we are joined by our guest, Dr MC McDonald, author of The Trauma Response Is Never Wrong to break down all of the science and psychology behind why we react to trauma the way we do, suppressed memories, what actually counts as 'traumatic' and the impact of trauma on our body. We also explore some of the more unexpected traumas we encounter and attempt to answer the question "will I ever heal from my trauma?". All that and more in this episode. Follow Dr MC: https://www.instagram.com/mc.phd/ Purchase her book here: https://www.amazon.com/Unbroken-Trauma-Response-Never-Things/dp/1683648846 Follow me: https://www.instagram.com/thatpsychologypodcast/ Patreon: https://www.patreon.com/ThePsychologyofyour20s See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

Aug 18, 202355 min

116. Is it love, or are you just attached?

Love and attachment feel very similar, and it's very easy to confuse the two especially in the early stages of dating when we are overwhelmed by infatuation and the novelty of a new relationship. However, they are very different. Whilst love is a deliberate choice, mutual, selflessness, and long lasting, attachment is unconscious, can be one-sided and based on what serves our needs. Confusing these two feelings can cause us to pursue the wrong people, invest too quickly and, at times, end up hurt and disappointed. Today we're going to explore how to tell the difference, why we need to protect ourselves from getting attached too quickly, especially when we are prone to fantasy bonding or bread crumbing, and how to detach and let that bond develop slowly. We're also going to talk about the 6 questions we can use to answer the question: am I in love, or am I just attached? Listen now! Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/thatpsychologypodcast/?hl=en Patreon: https://www.patreon.com/ThePsychologyofyour20s See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

Aug 15, 202342 min

115. Let's talk about depression in our 20s

In this episode, I want to talk about depression. And not just from a psychological and scientific perspective but also from a personal perspective, sharing parts of my story. It's not something I've talked about much on the podcast but recently I've really come to terms with my own shame and stigma and I want to discuss where I'm at now, the journey I've been on and how its impacted the life I've created for myself in my 20s. We're also going to explore some of the key principles and theories behind the origins of depression, misconceptions, the different forms of depression, historical recognition of this condition, whether exercise really is a 'cure', and the new frontier of depression research, including the proposed use of psychedelics and ketamine. If you or someone you know needs help, please see the below resources: Beyond Blue - https://www.beyondblue.org.au/ Black Dog Institute - https://www.blackdoginstitute.org.au/resources-support/depression/ Lifeline (for immediate over the phone support) - 13 11 14 For further reading, please see the below articles: Genetic Factors in Major Depression - https://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pmc/articles/PMC6065213/ Childhood Trauma and Its Relationship to Chronic Depression in Adulthood - https://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pmc/articles/PMC4677006/ Depression as a disease of modernity - https://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pmc/articles/PMC3330161/ Effects of Naturalistic Psychedelic Use on Depression, Anxiety, and Well-Being - https://www.frontiersin.org/articles/10.3389/fpsyt.2022.831092/full See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

Aug 11, 202356 min

114. Healing your inner teen

Everyone is talking about healing our inner child, but what about our inner teenager? We experience certain things in adolescence that we don't experience as children and these can manifest in different behaviours, defence mechanisms and emotional wounds that continue with us into adulthood. Whilst the inner child is seen as gentle and vulnerable, the inner teen may be angry, misunderstood and lonely. So in this episode we break some some of the psychology and theories behind healing your inner teen, including the interactions with our hormones, certain life experiences and the impact of our first romantic encounters and sexual experiences. We also explore how we can release the rage of our inner teen, express those wounds and use the adult chair method to feel more connected with this past version. The Adult Chair Podcast: https://open.spotify.com/show/4FzdV2nB2BZlywCxowM1Xw?si=080b7a4a392d4dde Patreon: https://patreon.com/ThePsychologyofyour20s?utm_medium=clipboard_copy&utm_source=copyLink&utm_campaign=creatorshare_creator&utm_content=join_link Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/thatpsychologypodcast/ See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

Aug 8, 202341 min

113. Forgiving yourself for past mistakes

All of us are going to mess up. In our 20s and every decade thereafter. But its what we choose to do with those mistakes that's important. In this episode we explore why we often regret past decisions and actions, looking at the development of our brain and personality, we also explore the distinction between regret and guilt and why both emotions may actually be protecting us from future pain. Part of this is understanding the difference between our actual and ideal self and the psychology behind why we choose to punish ourselves for past mistakes rather than embrace them and move on. Self forgiveness is the most powerful antidote and we'll dive into exactly how to enact this practice and release those painful memories and mistakes from our past through accountability and shared humanity. Listen now! Patreon: https://patreon.com/ThePsychologyofyour20s Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/thatpsychologypodcast/?hl=en See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

Aug 4, 202339 min

112. Your ex moved on - now what?

It’s something we all inevitably experience in our dating lives, the pain of a break-up, saying goodbye to someone we loved and then, one day, the realisation that your ex has moved on and is with someone new. It can be incredibly confronting and painful, so today we're going to explore exactly why it hurts, even if deep down, we know we were never going to work. We will dive into the psychological ideas and theories behind rosy retrospection, social comparison, our self worth and the emotional and psychological closure that occurs when our ex moves on. We also examine the role of the rebound and why it’s important to take time to heal before getting into a new relationship, as explained by the addiction model of heartbreak and stages of grief. But finally, what next? Now that the chapter has finally closed, how do we move on and heal in a healthy manner and ignore those lingering self doubts that everything we had with our ex, they're now having with someone. All that and more in this episode, listen now! Patreon: https://patreon.com/ThePsychologyofyour20s Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/thatpsychologypodcast/?hl=en See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

Aug 1, 202342 min

111. The healing power of nature

This week we're discussing the secret and the science behind the healing powers of nature. Our generation has become increasingly detached from the outdoors and our wild roots, with over 90% of our days spent indoors or on a screen, often at the expense of our mental wellbeing, sense of self, psychological and spiritual connection with the land and overall physical health. In this episode we explore ideas around nature deficit disorder, recent longitudinal studies on the impacts of green spaces on our mental health and practices such as forest bathing, forest schools, water therapy and what we can learn from the deep connection that Indigenous groups have with the land. We also discuss how we can easily integrate more time outdoors into our daily routine to radically improve our psychological wellbeing. Listen now. Patreon: https://patreon.com/ThePsychologyofyour20s Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/thatpsychologypodcast/?hl=en See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

Jul 28, 202337 min

110. The psychology of hyperindependence

Independence is highly regarded as an admirable personality trait - we are obsessed with people who are self made, who solo travel, pay their own bills and don't seem to need anyone. However, our sense of independence can become problematic when we approach the point of hyper-independency. Hyper-independence refers to an excessive sense of self sufficiency and self reliance, in which we deny the help of others, prefer doing things on our own and avoid emotional vulnerability. Researchers have since suggested that this kind of behaviour may actually be a trauma response, whereby we push others away to protect ourselves from being hurt due to past experiences. In today's episode we break down the psychology of hyper-independence, specifically its origins in childhood emotional neglect and being forced to grow up too soon. We examine the major indicators of hyper-independence, the links to codependency, as well as the consequences this can have for our love lives and careers, whilst also exploring how we can heal. Listen now. Patreon: https://patreon.com/ThePsychologyofyour20s Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/thatpsychologypodcast/?hl=en See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

Jul 25, 202340 min

109. Why are we so hard on ourselves?

So often in life, we are our own worst enemies. The meanest and loudest voice in our head is our own. So why are we so hard on ourselves? In this episode we break down the psychological underpinnings behind our inner critic, from the proposed evolutionary role of negative self talk, to the influence of our upbringing including the distinction between conditional and unconditional positive regard, parental expectations and childhood bullying. We examine how social comparison and overthinking can contribute to a poor self perception but, also, how we can adopt the methods of radical self compassion and cognitive diffusion to silence that inner voice and be free from self judgement. Listen now! Patreon: https://patreon.com/ThePsychologyofyour20s Harvard Business Review article: https://hbr.org/2021/05/stop-being-so-hard-on-yourself Follow me on Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/thatpsychologypodcast/?hl=en&__coig_restricted=1See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

Jul 22, 202338 min

108. The psychology of gaslighting

The term 'gaslighting' has grown in popularity in recent years and become part of our shared psychobabble, giving our generation the language to describe a pattern of behaviour that has existed for centuries. This week on the podcast, we explore a recent story in the media on gaslighting and dive into what gaslighting actually means from a psychological perspective. We explore the origins of the term, how it references pop culture, the six behavioural patterns adopted by gaslighters and the links to narcissism and pathological lying. We also discuss how to identify this behaviour, detach from these individuals and move forward from the emotional hangover created by gaslighting. All that and more, listen now! Subscribe to our Patreon: https://patreon.com/ThePsychologyofyour20s The article mentioned: https://www.asanet.org/wp-content/uploads/attach/journals/oct19asrfeature.pdf See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

Jul 18, 202346 min

107. How to get out of a rut

On this week's episode we discuss why we fall into a so called 'rut' and how to pull ourselves out of it and rekindle our sense of self! Our 20s represent a transition into adulthood where we can find ourselves more and more detached from ourselves, uninspired, unmotivated, unexcited by life. The reasons for why this occurs varies, from the transition to full-time work, experiencing failure, the monotony of daily routine and even chronic stress. We're going to discuss six psychological strategies and theories for how we can break out of this cycle, including the benefits of impulsive behaviour, the healing power of nature, how to set a weekly challenge and much more. For all my 20-something year olds out there, stuck in a bit of a rut. This episode if for you. Subscribe on Patreon for exclusive bonus content: https://patreon.com/ThePsychologyofyour20s See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

Jul 14, 202339 min

106. Overcoming trauma and complex PTSD ft. Amy B Chesler

TW: Domestic violence, sexual abuse. In her early 20s, Amy suffered an unimaginable loss. Her mother was murdered at the hands of her brother. But what came next is an even more incredible story of growth, advocacy and overcoming adversity and trauma. In this week's episode, we speak to Amy about trauma in our 20s and how we can push through grief and loss. We discuss the power of positive self talk, the psychology of complex PTSD, unlearning generational trauma and how to use your pain to help others. Listen now. Follow the incredible Amy to hear more about her work: https://www.instagram.com/amybchesler/ Amy's podcast: https://open.spotify.com/show/3amRVnSbdrioaBoaHcNRiq?si=364be5d8f92043b1 Buy Amy's book: https://www.amazon.com.au/Working-Justice-Familys-Betrayal-Healing/dp/1642937541 If you found this episode distressing, please see the following resources for additional assistance: Reachout: https://au.reachout.com/ Beyond Blue: https://www.beyondblue.org.au/ Mental Health America: https://www.mhanational.org/get-involved/contact-us See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

Jul 11, 202341 min

105. The stigma of being single

Being single has never been more common, with more people being single than ever before in history. And yet, we still experience a great degree of social and internal stigma, and even shame, around our relationship status. From the comments of family or friends saying that "you'll find someone soon", to the movies where marriage and partnership is the happy ending, sometimes we feel the need to settle in order to be happy or live up to societies expectations. In today's episode we explore the psychology behind this - from gender schema theory, to the scarcity effect, media psychology, identity fusion, and the hidden benefits of our single years. We also discuss whether it's wrong to want a relationship and whether we need to be fully healed before dating again? The answer is, it's complicated. Listen now!See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

Jul 7, 202339 min

104. The psychology of overthinking and indecision

Overthinking can sometimes feel like an endless mental maze that we're trapped in. This tendency to overthink can also lead to chronic indecisiveness and obsessive acknowledgement of the opinions of others. But overthinking is much more common that when we think, and may actually indicate a greater sense of self awareness and emotional intelligence. In this episode we explore why we have a tendency to overthink, from the illusion of control, to perfectionism, childhood learning and the link to ADHD and depressive rumination. We'll also dive into the strategies and ways we can control our overthinking and become better decision makers without needing to consider every outcome or ruminate for days. This episode is for all my fellow chronic overthinkers, listen now! See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

Jul 4, 202343 min

103. How to be completely unique

The desire to be unique and individual is one that we all feel, especially in our 20s as we begin to establish our 'adult' identity and make efforts to distinguish ourselves. In this weeks episode we discuss seven major tips and strategies for being the most interesting and unique person in any room - from embracing unconventional thinking, rejecting the herd mentality of trends and the desire to be the "it" girl, spending time in nature, and challenging yourself creatively, being different is no longer and bad thing. Listen now to learn the psychology behind how we can be completely unique. See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

Jun 30, 202339 min

102. Queer identity in our 20s ft. Claud Bailey

This week we sit down for an intimate conversation with the incredible Claud Bailey, a queer film director and queer youth advocate based in Sydney, Australia to discuss what our gender and sexuality means for our 20s. We dive into the meaning of community, gender expression, the beauty of queerness and how to navigate coming of age as a queer person in the 21st century, along with the role of being a responsible and compassionate ally. Alongside this we also explore the power of rituals, the relationship between pleasure and pain and the role of beauty in enjoying our lives to the fullest. Listen now to hear more from our wonderful guest! Follow Claud: https://www.instagram.com/ /?hl=en Wear It Purple: https://www.wearitpurple.org/ The Trevor Project: https://www.thetrevorproject.org/resources/ See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

Jun 27, 202345 min

101. The psychology of ghosting

Today we're discussing the increasing prevalence of ghosting in modern dating. The use of dating apps has created a sense of choice overload, whilst social media has simultaneously allowed us a sense of online anonymity and diminished our ability to communicate, resulting in a rise in ghosting. Being ghosted can leave us craving emotional closure and feeling a sense of rejection. However, there are a number of psychological motivations behind why people ghost us, including emotional unavailability, emotional intelligence, the Dark Triad of narcissism, psychopathy and machiavellianism, but also people pleasing tendencies and convenience. We explore all of these reasons and more, as well as the best response to being ghosted and how we can provide ourselves with the psychological closure and answers we need. Listen now.See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

Jun 23, 202338 min

100. What I've learned from 2 years of podcasting

HAPPY 100th EPISODE! In this week's episode, we are celebrating two very special milestones - 100 episodes of The Psychology of your 20s and the 2 year anniversary of the show. I decided to sit down and answer some of your questions around what I've learned from this experience, what advice I would give, how I'm going, my future plans, why heartbreak gave me the best gift I could have asked for and give some lighting round advice to my most asked questions. I want to say a huge thank you for all the support and love this show has received. It had such humble beginnings. I started it as an audio journal to just talk about my 20s and now its my full time job and my greatest passion. Your support means the world, thank you to all my listeners, new and old for the way you changed my life! Listen now for more sappy reflections. See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

Jun 20, 202345 min

99. The myth of the 5-year plan

In our 20s we can often feel like we have to have a plan for our lives or a 5 year vision for where we want to be. This can cause us to be boxed in and blind to the surprises opportunities that life throws our way. The idea of a 5 year plan is a myth and in today's episode, we are going to break down why. From societal conventions of a 'good' life, the butterfly effect, the psychology behind impulsive decisions and goal setting and the need for a sense of control over the chaos of our 20s, we explore all that and more to uncover why your school counsellor was wrong and you DON'T need a five year plan for your life. Listen now. See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

Jun 16, 202329 min

98. The psychology of self sabotage

Sometimes our biggest enemy isn't others, it's ourselves. Self sabotage is a complicated psychological experience whereby we unconsciously undermine our own goals and wellbeing because of an implicit belief that we don't deserve our success, are afraid of failure, or cannot allow ourselves to be happy. From dating people we shouldn't, to procrastination, indecision, doom scrolling and self destructive behaviours, it all comes down to our unconscious beliefs about our self worth. Today we explore the origins and causes of self sabotage, from Freud's ideas of the 'death drive' and 'anti-self', coping mechanisms, to the impact of unresolved emotional trauma and self punishment to understand why it is we self sabotage, and how we can get out of our own way. Listen now. See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

Jun 13, 202343 min

97. The long distance dilemma

Long distance in any relationship can be hard, so why do we choose to do it? In our 20s our relationships take on an increased level of seriousness, but at the same time we are also presented with so many wonderful decisions to travel, move new places, try new positions and jobs and figure out what we want from our lives. However, our partners don't always make the same decision. In this episode, we discuss the long distance dilemma - why distance can cause so much friction and conflict, the crucial considerations and signs that your long distance relationship will last, and how to know when its time to call it quits and walk away. We reveal all the psychology behind why long distance relationships work, and why they don't. Listen now. See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

Jun 9, 202340 min

96. I feel ugly

Recently I've been feeling, as the episode title says, ugly. My relationship with my body and sense of 'attractiveness' has always been complicated and in the past few months, certain events and experiences have only exacerbated a lot of the insecurities I've had since childhood. So I wanted to talk about it, because I know I'm not the only one. Our 20s involve a lot of self growth, coming into our own identity and reframing our mindset on appearance and our relationships with our bodies. So what are some of the reasons why we feel 'ugly', how does that experience impact our emotional and mental wellbeing, what is the influence of societally held beauty standards and how we can escape this narrative that our looks are the extend of our worth to society. We talk about all of that and more in today's episode. Listen now. If you need further information, resources or assistance please refer to the following services: Australia - The Butterfly Foundation https://butterfly.org.au/get-support/helpline/USA - National Eating Disorders Association https://www.nationaleatingdisorders.orgUK - Beat Eating Disorders https://www.beateatingdisorders.org.ukCanada - National Eating Disorder Information Centre https://nedic.caWorldwide - https://www.verywellmind.com/leading-eating-disorder-charities-and-organizations-4145389See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

Jun 6, 202340 min

95. Dating with intention in our 20s

Dating in our 20s can feel like an uphill battle, and many of us are seeking an alternative to casual relationships and meaningless flings or hookups. This week on the podcast, we discuss how we can adopt an intentional approach to our romantic life and dating decisions, in particular, how this can free us from some of the pressure and stress that accompanies dating in our 20s. We discuss the psychology and research behind self awareness, value and goal orientation, self concept, understanding what others want and how to lower your expectations and meet people organically so that we can embrace the excitement and fun of meeting new people and forming meaningful connections. Listen now. Follow us on Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/thatpsychologypodcast/?hl=enSee omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

Jun 1, 202332 min

94. Chronic illness and overcoming adversity ft. Bradley Dryburgh

In 2020, Bradley found himself questioning death. He was 24 and lying in hospital bed with bleeding lungs caused by his condition, cystic fibrosis. Three years later, he has run multiple marathons, left behind his successful career as a realtor and is now running his podcast 'A Lot To Talk About', sharing his story. This week we break down his journey, including his philosophy towards overcoming the adversity we all face in our 20s, whatever that may be. We dive into the psychology of living with a chronic disease and how Bradley's entire perspective has changed since 2020. Listen to his inspiring story and interview now. Bradley's podcast: https://open.spotify.com/show/0F7u8INlXQ0KvtjwK6Zf12?si=3bfe175327f94848 Follow Bradley on Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/bradleyjdryburgh/?hl=en Follow us on Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/thatpsychologypodcast/?hl=enSee omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

May 29, 202346 min

93. How to build consistency

All of us in our 20s have some goal or ambition that we are striving for and whatever that may be, consistency is the key to our success. On this episode we break down how we can use the psychology behind consistency and motivation to help achieve our goals, from microhabits to delayed gratification, self compassion, a monthly routine and incremental reinforcement. We also examine some of the science and social psychology behind productivity and how society has dictated the ways in which we pursue our goals and why we might have it wrong. Join us as we deep dive into the ways we can cultivate consistency in our 20s. Listen now. See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

May 26, 202333 min

92. The psychology of platonic soulmates

Platonic soulmates represent the idea that our deepest relationships and our strongest bonds don't have to be romantic, sexual or based on attraction, they can be between us and our friends. This idea of platonic soulmates has been on the rise, however, it's not a new phrase. Plato, the ancient greek philosopher, was one of the first people to identify this feeling of deep connection and understanding between two individuals that appears to be inexplicable or spiritual. From there, psychology has expanded on whether this concept is even real, why we feel this way towards certain people, what makes a platonic soulmate, the impact these relationships have on our wellbeing and lives and how to identify when one of these people has entered your life. Listen now as we deep dive into the psychology of platonic soulmates. See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

May 23, 202337 min

91. Overcoming milestone anxiety in our 20s

In our 20s, we face an increasing sense of pressure to reach certain important, life milestones, such as getting into our first relationship, graduating university, finding our career path, getting engaged and so many more. When we don't meet the expectations or the timeline that society gives us, we can feel like failures and begin to self sabotage or ruminate on our faults and flaws. This week we're going to explore the psychology behind milestone anxiety - the experience of stress and unease when we haven't achieved certain milestones by a certain age - why it occurs, the influence of social comparison and conditioning, how we can combat this feeling, practice self compassion and be excited by our own journey through life, and our 20s. Listen now. See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

May 19, 202343 min

90. The psychology of open relationships

Today, we're diving into the psychology behind open relationships in our 20s - why people are attracted to the idea of non-monogamy, how they operate, the boundaries that are set, how to navigate sexual jealousy and whether they actually work? Open relationships have become an increasingly popular alternative to traditional monogamy, but they are not a new concept. Why are some people more curious when it comes to open relationships? Do some people need more sex than others? Whats the point of being in a committed relationship if you're allowed to date other people? We set out to answer all of these questions in todays episode to further understand the psychology behind open relationships. Listen now. See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

May 16, 202345 min

89. Maintaining your identity in a relationship

This week, I'm joined by the fabulous Al and Sal, the hosts of Two Broke Chicks, to discuss how we can maintain our identity in a relationship, especially in our 20s. Our romantic relationships are fundamental elements of our identity and we all crave the warm and fuzzy feelings that accompany dating someone wonderful. But how do we ensure that our partners and relationship do not take over our lives, our identity and our independence? We break down the everyday practices to ensure our individuality remains strong, why you shouldn't neglect your friendships and how to identify when you may need to draw back and spend some time alone. Listen now. Follow and listen to Two Broke Chicks here: https://open.spotify.com/show/3d4z5FXeXAtmmP6DPhkpzw?si=027c610a26e54474See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

May 12, 202348 min

88. The psychology of dreams

This week on the podcast we are breaking down the psychology of our dreams - why we dream, the role of our brain, what our dreams mean, repressed desires, nightmares and even the role of daydreaming for our mental wellbeing. If you've ever wondered about your weird dreams, some of the scientific theories and whether you are a maladaptive daydreamer, this episode is for you as we jump into the fascinating science and psychology behind these imaginative, colourful hallucinations. Listen now!See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

May 9, 202337 min

87. Should you quit your 9-5?

Many of us in our 20's have become disillusioned with the 9-5 lifestyle and the reality of working an office job for the rest of our lives. Psychology shows us that the 9-5 job is not only inefficient but unnatural, leaving us feeling burnt-out, unmotivated, detached from the things that matter and searching for an alternative that offers both freedom and flexibility. This week, I talk about my own journey of leaving behind my 9-5 job and pursuing the podcast full time; from why I made my decision, what the transition has been like and my advice and tips on how you can do the same. Listen now to understand why you should quit your 9-5. See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

May 5, 202344 min

86. Perfectionism and academic anxiety

Perfectionism is on the rise amongst young people, and in this episode we break down exactly what it means to have perfectionist tendencies. We examine the theories of personality, our upbringing, links to OCD and ADHD and what it means for academic performance and anxiety. We also dive into some of the methods for minimising our perfectionism, including visualisation, the 80-20 rule, cognitive behavioural therapy and positive self talk to show how life isn't perfect, so you don't have to be either. Listen now. See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

May 2, 202342 min

85. 'Daddy issues' and dating in your 20s ft. Violet Benson

This Friday we sit down with the wonderful Violet Benson, host of the podcast Almost Adulting, also known for her famous meme account, Daddy Issues, as we discuss everything dating in our 20s, specifically the truth about daddy issues, healing childhood trauma and parental relationships and how to reestablish your boundaries and standards. That, and so much more. Listen now! Follow Violet everywhere: Almost Adulting podcast - https://open.spotify.com/show/7IY1Gjc1uktmDCmNLA0HXo?si=14792ff30f75463e Violet Benson - https://www.instagram.com/violetbenson/?hl=en Daddy Issues - https://www.instagram.com/daddyissues_/?hl=en See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

Apr 27, 202337 min

84. Loneliness is not your enemy!

This week we break down the psychological, biological and evolutionary underpinnings of loneliness and break down some of the stigma around feeling lonely in your 20's. This decade is full of a number of significant life transitions and changes that can lead us to feel isolated and detached, but loneliness sometimes get's a bad wrap. We explore how we can cultivate a better relationship with loneliness by understanding the instinctual urges behind this feeling, embracing solitude and reframing the narrative around exactly how common it is to feel lonely in your 20's. Listen now!See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

Apr 25, 202339 min

83. The psychology of 'lucky girl syndrome'

On this episode we break down the science and psychology of the internet and TikTok sensation of "lucky girl syndrome". We explore the ideas and theories behind self fulfilling prophecies, confirmation bias, goal-oriented behaviour, brain anatomy and the power of positive affirmations on shifting our mindset to reveal whether lucky girl syndrome is fact or fiction, and where ideas of privilege and personality come in. Listen now! See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

Apr 21, 202332 min

82. The psychology of emotional unavailability

This week we are discussing the science and psychology of emotional unavailability and breaking down the misconceptions and myths about emotional unavailability in our 20's, particularly when it comes to dating people who won't commit. We’re going to break down exactly what emotional unavailability versus availability looks like and how it manifests in relationships, what emotional unavailability means on a personal, individual level, the difference between men and women when it comes to this concept and how to develop emotional availability and grow closer to the ones we love and attract those who are equally emotionally available. Listen now! See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

Apr 18, 202339 min

81. Date yourself instead ft. Lyss Boss

This week we are joined by Lyss Boss, the host of Date Yourself Instead, to discuss dating in our 20's, particularly what it means to deliberately choose to be single, how we can learn from past relationships and heal our attachment styles. Alongside this we dive into the psychology behind karmic relationships, repeating toxic patterns in relationships and learning to move on through authenticity and creativity. Listen now! See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

Apr 12, 202341 min

80. Why you should take risks in your 20’s

This week we discuss the psychology behind why we all should be prepared to talk risks and push beyond our comfort zone in our 20’s. This topic has a lot of personal relevance for me right now, which I share in this episode, but there is also a lot of science and psychology that is incredibly compelling and persuasive as to why taking a risk is a good thing! From studies on the impact of regret and inaction, to existential dread and the difference between bounded and unbounded risk, we are going to break down all of the explanations behind taking that leap of faith in our 20’s. Listen now!See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

Apr 7, 202330 min

79. The psychology of breakups

Breakups and heartache are a universal experience in our 20’s. But what exactly happens to our minds, our bodies and our emotions at the end of a relationship? This week we will break down the psychology and the science behind breakups, heartbreak and moving on. We will explore the theory of withdrawal, stages of grief, conditioning and the psychology behind why ‘no contact’ really does work to hopefully provide some solace to all the heartbroken out there on what exactly a breakup does to our psychology. Buy merch here: https://the-psychology-of-your-20s.myshopify.com/See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

Mar 30, 202346 min

78. Let’s talk about eating disorders

In this episode we break down the psychology behind eating disorders - from anorexia to bulimia and binge eating disorder. Amalie Lee, the Host of the Recovery Talk podcast joins us to discuss her own experience with anorexia and as an eating disorder recovery coach as we break down the triggers and origins of eating disorders, the misconceptions, how they impact our psychological and emotional well-being and the journey to healing and recovery. If you or someone you know needs help or for further information and psychological services on eating disorders, please see the following:Australia - The Butterfly Foundation https://butterfly.org.au/get-support/helpline/USA - National Eating Disorders Association https://www.nationaleatingdisorders.orgUK - Beat Eating Disorders https://www.beateatingdisorders.org.ukCanada - National Eating Disorder Information Centre https://nedic.caWorldwide - https://www.verywellmind.com/leading-eating-disorder-charities-and-organizations-4145389See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

Mar 23, 20231h 2m

77. Why do we worry about the future?

This week on the podcast we discuss the experience of worrying and overthinking the future. From anticipatory anxiety, the the illusion of control, paradox of choice and self preservation, anxiety about the future has a lot of psychological origins that we will unpack in todays episode to try and find freedom from future spiralling and embrace the moment.See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

Mar 16, 202335 min