The Jackson Two

PJ and the gang embark on their most perilous and foolhardy trial yet: VIGOROUS EXERCISE IMMEDIATELY AFTER A HUGE BARBECUE DINNER. We also discuss the practical benefits of polytheism, some interesting loopholes in heteronormative contract-language, and the Big Three reenact a Seinfeld episode! Find us on Twitter @The_Jackson_Two, email us at [email protected], and find us on Patreon at https://www.patreon.com/TheJacksonTwo for early episodes, exclusive preshows and other bonus content you won't find on EVEN THE DARKEST WEB! And remember: If there's a ding, there's a sting!

PJ receives a gift at knifepoint, does accidental sexisms and wastes a PERFECTLY GOOD hunk of mouthwatering brisket! We also go on an ABSOLUTE RAMPAGE of a beverage tangent, examine what jerks the gods are from a theological perspective, and give you a GLIMPSE INTO THE FUTURE with a personalized Tarot reading covering the week ahead JUST FOR YOU! Find us on Twitter @The_Jackson_Two, email us at [email protected], and find us on Patreon at https://www.patreon.com/TheJacksonTwo for early episodes, exclusive preshows and other bonus content you won't find on EVEN THE DARKEST WEB! And remember: If there's a ding, there's a sting!

ASSUME THE EXPOSITION, campers, 'cause Chiron and Annabeth are HERE TO EXPLAIN SOME STUFF, and WE ARE HERE to be PRETTY UNCOMFORTABLE with MUCH OF WHAT THEY HAVE TO SAY RE: DISABILITY. Ah, time makes fools of us all.Also, the SHOCKING ORIGINS of a scam the United States military and medical apparatus have been pulling on us for a CENTURY, the PREVIOUSLY HIDDEN connection between The Shape Of Water and Star Trek: Voyager, and accidental prostitution shenanigans as we discuss The Lightning Thief, Chapter 6: I Become Supreme Lord Of The Bathroom! The Jackson Two are William Mills and Casey Hills, who rhyme but are not relation. Editing and production is also by Casey.Our intro music is Good Evening Loop, and our outro is Weekender, both by Serge Quadrado.Find us on Twitter @The_Jackson_Two, email us at [email protected], and find us on Patreon at https://www.patreon.com/TheJacksonTwo for early episodes, exclusive preshows and other bonus content you won't find on EVEN THE DARKEST WEB! And remember: If there's a ding, there's a sting!

AND YOU MAY FIND YOURSELF IN A STRANGE SUMMER CAMP AND YOU MAY FIND YOURSELF FED A DELICIOUS POPCORN-PUDDING AND YOU MAY FIND YOURSELF GIVEN A PRETTY XENOPHOBIC EXPLANATION OF THE STATE OF THE THEOLOGICAL UNION BY A HORSE OF A DIFFERENT COLOR AND YOU MAY ASK YOURSELF: "WELL, WHY DID I COME HERE?" We put The Lightning Thief Chapter Six: I Play Pinochle With A Horse through the shredder for a couple of things but mostly enjoy it, and also discuss the unification of the Germanic states, the Great Diet Beverage Schism of 1986, and the LAW OF THE TONGUE, here in The Lightning Thief, Chapter 5: I Play Pinochle With A Horse! The Jackson Two are William Mills and Casey Hills, who rhyme but are not relation. Editing and production is also by Casey. Our intro music is Good Evening Loop, and our outro is Weekender, both by Serge Quadrado. Find us on Twitter @The_Jackson_Two, email us at [email protected], and find us on Patreon at https://www.patreon.com/TheJacksonTwo for early episodes, exclusive preshows and other bonus content you won't find on EVEN THE DARKEST WEB! And remember: If there's a ding, there's a sting!

PJ finally gets some friggin' answers around here! And by 'answers' we mean 'car crashes and emotional trauma'. ALSO: A lecture in the KINETIC PRINCIPLES of BOVINE MOMENTUM from our visiting Professor of Cow Science, a brief aside on the time Doctor Doom was indisputably the victim of the Fantastic Four, and an introduction to the Rhodesian Ridgeback, which is ALLEGEDLY not a dragon, in our new segment Welcome To Doggo Corner, only here and only now as we discuss The Lightning Thief, Chapter 4: My Mother Teaches Me Bullfighting! The Jackson Two are William Mills and Casey Hills, who rhyme but are not relation. Editing and production is also by Casey. Our intro music is Good Evening Loop, and our outro is Weekender, both by Serge Quadrado. Find us on Twitter @The_Jackson_Two, email us at [email protected], and find us on Patreon at https://www.patreon.com/TheJacksonTwo for early episodes, exclusive preshows and other bonus content you won't find on EVEN THE DARKEST WEB! And remember: If there's a ding, there's a sting!

WHOA-OH, SAINT SALLY, BAM-A-LAM, we meet PJ's mom and his stepfather MOST WICKED, who DOESN'T EVEN USE his discount electronics privileges to score PJ free HD-DVDs, new skins for his Zune or the latest breed of Furbo! Also he and his mom go to the beach to watch ANIMALS FIGHT EACH OTHER! Be prepared to learn about the TERRIBLE FATE OF THE NOBLE BANANA, the TRAGIC GRAFFITI-SCARRED SHEEP OF IRELAND, and WHY BEN AND/OR JERRY TRIED TO KILL YOUR DOG IN THE NAME OF PURPLE, as we explore The Lightning Thief, Chapter 3: Grover Unexpectedly Loses His Pants, here and only here on this friggin' thing! And remember: If there’s a ding, there’s a sting! The Jackson Two are William Mills and Casey Hills, who rhyme but are not relation. Editing and production is also by Casey. Our intro music is Good Evening Loop, and our outro is Weekender, both by Serge Quadrado. Find us on Twitter @The_Jackson_Two, email us at [email protected], and find us on Patreon at https://www.patreon.com/TheJacksonTwo for early episodes and exclusive preshows!

PJ bucks a CORRUPT ACADEMIC SYSTEM and is sentenced to live on a BUS for his THOUGHTCRIMES, where he and Grover get snippy with their three grandmas and try to collect enough fruit for an extra life, and we ask the age old question: Where the hell is Pierce Brosnan actually from? Join us as we explore The Lightning Thief, Chapter 2: Three Old Ladies Knit The Socks Of Death! The Jackson Two are William Mills and Casey Hills, who rhyme but are not relation. Editing and production is also by Casey. Our intro music is Good Evening Loop, and our outro is Weekender, both by Serge Quadrado. Find us on Twitter @The_Jackson_Two, email us at [email protected], and find us on Patreon at https://www.patreon.com/TheJacksonTwo for early episodes and exclusive preshows!

A school visit to the museum goes terribly awry, we discuss Percy's role in the invasion of Iraq, and learn UP TO THREE new words or your mattress is free! All this and more in our field trip through The Lightning Thief, Chapter 1: I Accidentally Vaporize My Pre-Algebra Teacher!The Jackson Two are William Mills and Casey Hills, who rhyme but are not relation. Editing and production is also by Casey.Our intro music is Good Evening Loop, and our outro is Weekender, both by Serge Quadrado.Find us on Twitter @The_Jackson_Two, email us at [email protected], and find us on Patreon at https://www.patreon.com/TheJacksonTwo for early episodes and exclusive preshows!