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How Asking One Hard Question Builds Deeper Trust, with Alain de Botton

How Asking One Hard Question Builds Deeper Trust, with Alain de Botton

The High Performance Podcast · High Performance

June 4, 202534m 31s

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Show Notes

<p>This new <em>Essential Habits </em>series breaks down the key habits behind high performance, one episode at a time. This week’s habit is deceptively simple: asking better questions.</p><br><p>Philosopher Alain de Botton joins us to explore how a single, uncomfortable question, “How have I annoyed you?” can deepen trust, defuse tension, and create stronger connections in every part of life.</p><br><p>Whether it’s at home, at work, or with close friends, we often avoid the conversations that would help us grow. Alain shows us a different way, one built on emotional generosity, honest listening, and the courage to be vulnerable.</p><br><p>In this episode, we explore:</p><p><br></p><ul><li>Why awkward questions build trust</li><li>How to listen without getting defensive</li><li>The science behind emotional connection</li><li>What high-performing teams can learn from philosophy</li><li>The hidden power of backstories and being 'truly heard'</li></ul><p><br></p><p>Here is a list of studies referenced in the episode:</p><p><br></p><ol><li><a href="https://journals.sagepub.com/doi/pdf/10.1177/0146167297234003" rel="noopener noreferrer" target="_blank">The Experimental Generation of Interpersonal Closeness</a>. Arthur Aron, Elaine Aron (1997)</li><li><em>Understanding the conversation gap: Why employees aren’t talking, and what we can do about it</em> (Braverly), referenced in <a href="https://online.hbs.edu/blog/post/how-to-have-difficult-conversations-with-employees" rel="noopener noreferrer" target="_blank">How to Navigate Difficult Conversations with Employees</a>. Harvard Negotiation Project&nbsp;</li><li><a href="https://www.sciencedaily.com/releases/2003/10/031010074045.htm" rel="noopener noreferrer" target="_blank">Rejection Really Hurts</a>, published in<em> Science</em> (Oct 2003). University Of California - Los Angeles</li><li><a href="https://brenebrown.com/book/daring-greatly/" rel="noopener noreferrer" target="_blank"><em>Daring Greatly</em> </a>by Brené Brown</li></ol><p><br></p><p>Listen to the full episode with Alain De Botton here: <a href="https://pod.fo/e/1f5db0" rel="noopener noreferrer" target="_blank">https://pod.fo/e/1f5db0</a></p><p><br></p> <hr><p style='color:grey; font-size:0.75em;'> Hosted on Acast. See <a style='color:grey;' target='_blank' rel='noopener noreferrer' href='https://acast.com/privacy'>acast.com/privacy</a> for more information.</p>