The Failing Writers Podcast

Having trouble developing your characters in your writing? Well, we are too. Thankfully though, Jon has had a clever little idea that we explore in this episode. Will it be helpful? Who knows. Will it be worth an hour of your valuable time? Probably not. But you're going to listen anyway, aren't you? Admit it, you're a little bit addicted to the Failing Writers Podcast. Go on... one more listen won't do you any harm will it? You could quit whenever you want. Course you could. Find our most favouritist writing software, Scrivener, right here - www.literatureandlatte.com (and remember "FAILING" will get you 20% off!) See if you have a personality here - https://www.16personalities.com/free-personality-test Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Looking for all the info on how to enter our £300 competition, brought to you in association with Scrivener? Well, you’ll find it right here - along with a tale of two Rands. Our very own Jon Rand and American playwright Jon Rand. Two completely different people… or are they?? Find the other Jon Rand herehttps://jonathanrand.com/And a link to Scrivener (get 20% off by using the code FAILING)https://www.literatureandlatte.com/store/scrivener?tab=macOS Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Interviewees. Every podcast needs good interviewees. And with a little understanding, you can find the perfect chap - that's when good interviewees, become good craic. This week we talk to Aussie comedian and novelist, Benjamin Stevenson. Talking about his fantastic new book, "Everyone In My Family Has Killed Someone (spoiler alert - everyone from the family in the book has probably killed someone), getting optioned by HBO and we also talk about his even better unpublished work "Not Expecting Dooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooom". Plus, there's details of our upcoming writing comp, where you can win hundreds of pounds!!! Here's a link to Benjamin's book - https://www.penguin.co.uk/books/452671/everyone-in-my-family-has-killed-someone-by-stevenson-benjamin/9780241594933 And a link to Scrivener (get 20% off by using the code FAILING) https://www.literatureandlatte.com/store/scrivener?tab=macOS Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

As well as having a lovely, lovely chat with Janice about her romantic fiction work, we also subject her to our own "love" stories. She's kind enough to offer her thoughts and feedback on all three of of our stories, as (unsurprisingly!) we push back the boundaries of romantic fiction to breaking point. https://thebackpackinghousewife.com/ https://romanticnovelistsassociation.org/ Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

This week we are honoured to welcome Emmy award winning writer David Quantick. We talk window goats, having big ideas, getting the sack and chat to David about the reams and reams of amazing work he's done. It's fair to say we think this episode is Quanticky AND quality. LINKS https://davidquantick.com/ The first EVER internet sitcom "The Junkies" - https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=uFOayYFu7Fs That Star Wars bit from "The Thick Of It" - https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Cg-pnGFbwMQ New novel "Ricky's Hand" - https://www.amazon.co.uk/Rickys-Hand-David-Quantick-ebook/dp/B09DV2CVCB “How to Write Everything” https://www.amazon.co.uk/How-Write-Everything-David-Quantick/dp/1783191031“All My Colours”, David's novel about a failing writer: https://www.goodreads.com/book/show/41840158-all-my-colors Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

This week we unironically appoint ourselves as judge Judy and executioner when it comes to deciding what constitutes "good" and "bad" writing. We wade, like treaclenauts through the metaphorical linguistic molasses, to address profligate supererogatory expatiated prose as well as the down right boring and clunky – in a quest to get to the bottom of the question; “So, what exactly makes bad writing bad?” Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

It's finally Dave's turn to lay bare his work for the other Failing Writers to critique. Will he be happy with the advice he receives? Will Jon and Tom enjoy his work? Will Dave just have a tantrum and decide to quit writing for ever? Well, we’re not going to tell you in the show notes are we?! You’re gonna have to go and have a listen! Plus, we also have flash-fiction-meister Tim Craig back on to have a chat about his debut book (link below if you fancy buying it). BUY TIM'S BOOK HERE!!! https://bookshop.adhocfiction.com/index.php?main_page=product_info&cPath=65&products_id=235 And we gave a nudge to Anuj who very kindly added us to his Feedspot.com list of writing podcasts. Nice one Anuj. https://blog.feedspot.com/writing_podcasts/ Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

This week we're joined by a lovely chap by the name of Paul Quinn. He's just won a rather interesting "Best Unproduced Screenplay" award for his script, Pushing Daisy. So, we have a chat with him about where he's been on his writing journey so far and where he hopes it might take him in the future. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Writers... erm... thingy. Does it... erm... errrrrr... y'know, is it a wotist. A thingy-majig. Or not? We answer these perfectly formed questions and many, many, many, many* others in this week's thrilling installment of The Failing Writer's Blockcast. *we probably only answer about two other questions if we're honest - but let's not pretend you thought otherwise. https://www.decodingcreativity.com/Write Without the Fight: Master Your Creative Process to Write with Ease & Satisfaction - preview:https://amzn.to/3bmjzBb Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

This week we have a chat with Joanna Penn - author, podcaster, entrepreneur - and she shares her views on the business side of writing and being a successful author. Really interesting stuff! https://www.thecreativepenn.com Let us know what you think of this AI voicing stuff https://deepzen.io/ -- Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

This week we acknowledge that maybe our group writing project isn’t exactly racing ahead (surprise, surprise!) and try to actually get things moving on our stalling Poker Night sitcom. Plus we also have nice little guessing game, as Jon introduces a mystery guest. https://www.amazon.co.uk/Started-Swipe-Shelly-Smith/ Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

This week it's Jon's turn to open himself up to some honest feedback from the other Failing Writers - and also, somewhat bravely, from an unfailing writer too. Will Jon just want us to leaf him alone? Will his story take root in our imaginations? Will Dave and Tom's critique sap Jon's enthusiasm or is their bark worse than their bite? (Will anyone read this far or will they give up due to all the awful tree puns?) Find out, in this week's exciting instalment of... The Failing Writers Podcast!! Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

This week we talk to Nels Abbey, author of Think Like a White Man, and mostly cover all the same old subjects really. You know; stripper politics, Jim Davidson, Didcot Parkway and how to solve racism worldwide. (We also definitely don't give a plug to the release of the paperback verison of Chris Palling's A Very Nice Rejection Letter either). https://twitter.com/nelsabbey And if you want your very own copy of his wonderful book, to love and cherish and keep forever, you can...https://www.amazon.co.uk/Think-Like-White-Boulé-Whytelaw/dp/1786894343 Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

So the time has come for Tom to get some honest feedback from Jon and Dave, as he bravely submits his silly little sales book for appraisal from his fellow podcast hosts. Take a listen to find out what they thought of it, what Tom thought of what they thought of it, and what they thought of what Tom thought of what they thought of it.And if you're brave enough to make it through to the end, there's a lovely little surprise for all you tree lovers out there...... Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

We have a fantastic, illuminating and thought provoking chat with Will Storr this week. Delving into the human psyche and our fundamental core need for storytelling and narrative. Plus we continue to progress with our joint writing project for the season and Tom gets persuaded to share his work with Jon and Dave so they can offer "constructive criticism" next week.https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Will_Storrhttps://twitter.com/wstorrhttps://www.thescienceofstorytelling.com/ Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

In preparation for finally actually, maybe, starting to possibly begin to put pen to paper on our TV comedy pitch - this week we have a chat about our favourite (and less favourite) sitcoms and comedy dramas. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

This week we welcome author, comedy writer, performer (and all round massively talented) Emma Kennedy on to the podcast. We find out about her writing, she throws a few home truths our way and she gives us some good old fashioned advice as we start out on our Season 2 quest to write a sitcom comedy drama. https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Emma_Kennedy https://twitter.com/EmmaKennedy https://www.waterstones.com/book/letters-from-brenda/emma-kennedy/9781529371970 Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

In this episode we discuss writing competitions. And linked into that, we talk with a few people involved with The David Nobbs Memorial Trust - a bursary scheme that Dave entered recently (spoiler alert... he didn't win, but we speak to the person that did, Zoe Tomalin). We also have a delightful chat with trustee Margaret Cabourn-Smith, to find out more about the trust and its aims. David Nobbs Bursary Website:https://www.davidnobbsmemorialtrust.org.ukWriters HQ website - for writing competition listings:https://writershq.co.uk/writing-resources/writing-competitions-and-submission-opportunities/ Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

We're honoured to have one of our favourite writers on the podcast this week - as we welcome Jeremy Dyson. He shares some fantastic tips and a fair few 24-carrat-knowledge-nuggets with us too. So, sit back... relax... and soak it all up.League of Gentlemen:https://www.amazon.co.uk/gp/video/detail/B00ET0LXIU/ref=atv_dp_season_select_s1Funland:https://www.amazon.co.uk/Funland-William-Windom/dp/B07C45J6YKThe Cranes That Build the Craneshttps://www.goodreads.com/book/show/6738208-the-cranes-that-build-the-cranesRamsey Campbell ghost stories:https://www.goodreads.com/en/book/show/32463.Dark_Companions Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Big ideas, rude t-shirt slogans, misplaced confidence and our infallible master-plan – The Failing Writers return for season 2 of their potentially award winning podcast. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

So, we're back! And this time we're having a BIG idea. (Hopefully. At some point. Maybe. If we get round to it). Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Some people are on the podcast* - they think season one's all over... it is now!! *(those people would be Adrian Poynton, Caimh McDonnell, OMJ Ryan, Andy Stanton, Beth Chalmers and Simon Griffin - to whom we offer our thanks for dropping back in to have a catch up with us). Thank you to everyone who has listened to, supported and championed the podcast in our first season. We've had a great time putting it together and can't wait to bring you more thoroughly average chit-chat and moderately interesting happenings in March! Happy new year!! Music by Dano Songs (and Jon & Tom & Dave) Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

The end is nigh. The first part of our two part End of Season Spectacular sees us catch up with some of the guests that have helped make The Failing Writers Podcast one of the best (and as yet, pretty much undiscovered) podcasts of the year in the whole wide world. We have a quick catch up with poet Kate Fox, novelist Chris Paling, comedian and author Rosie Wilby, fabulous flash fictioner Tim Craig, children's author Adam Bushnell and international spy Tim Glister. Music by Dano songs Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Wrap yourself in tinsel, stuff 12 pigs in blankets in your mouth and get yourself comfortable to listen to this festive treat. In this seasonal spectacular, we proudly present the Failing Writers Podcast Panto (ohhhh yes we do!) and also a journey back through our first season, via some of our favourite songs from the series, in our top ten silly little ditty countdown (with a mystery celebrity DJ presenter!) Enjoy... and MERRY CHRISTMAS!! Music by Dano Songs(And Jon and Tom and Dave) Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Sally Wainwright OBE joins us on the show this week! What do you ask a multiple BAFTA award winning screenwriter with an impressive string of hit TV series to her name; like Happy Valley, Last Tango in Halifax and At Home With The Braithwaites?Oh really? You’d have asked her that? OK… OK… So... nothing about her bus driving career and her favourite crisps?You sure?Music by Dano Songs Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Undaunted by our ignominious failure in the previous NYC midnight flash fiction competition, we once again put ourselves through the short story wringer and present our writing for all to see and to praise/laugh at/mock/experience as an epiphanical life changing moment (delete as appropriate). And as well as giving our honest, frank and uncompromising feedback on each other’s 250 word "masterpieces", we also wrap up our NaNoWriMo adventure and review some writing software while we’re at it. Find out more about NaNoWriMo here...https://nanowrimo.org/Scrivener here...https://www.literatureandlatte.com/scrivener/overviewAnd the HG Wells story that Jon blatantly ripped off is here...https://www.gutenberg.org/files/23218/23218-h/23218-h.htmMusic by Dano songs Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

So, this week its' time to have a little chittertychat with Mr Simon Griffin, author of F*$%ing Apostrophes'. We talk about review's and how Simon pretty much almost became an author by accident! Enjoy's!Find Simon's lovely book here https://iconbooks.com/ib-title/fucking-apostrophes/And, now Jon's little feature is finally off and running, you can find David Lucas' book here https://www.amazon.co.uk/Uprooted-Vietnamese-Familys-Journey-1935-1975-ebook/dp/B019DIW1DSMusic by Dano songs Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

We're pretty lucky that Jon's writing hero responded to his somewhat serial killer-esque letter of invitation in the affirmative, rather than pursuing it further through legal channels. But all's well that ends well! We had a proper funty time with Andy, his chair and loads of really good insights into "the craft". (Fortunately we managed to keep Jon from embarrassing himself and letting it slip that he's actually got an Andy Stanton shrine in his downstairs loo... oh, and that he nearly called one of his kids Jammy Grammy Lammy F'Huppa F'Huppa Berlin Stereo Eo Eo Lebb C'Yepp Nermonica Le Straypek De Grespin De Crespin De Spespin De Vespin De Whoop De Loop De Brunkle Merry Christmas Lenoir). Find the wonderful world of Mr Gum here http://www.mrgum.co.uk/See Jon's...um...not at all creepy letter to Andy herehttps://www.failingwriterspodcast.com/blog/why-jon-wanted-andy-stanton-on-the-show-so-bad/Music by Dano songs Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

We talk to Tim Glister, who is definitely not a spy. And he tells us about when he REDACTED REDACTED REDACTED at Cambridge Analytica, as well as the time he REDACTED. But what's probably most interesting is the REDACTED REDACTED and the REDACTED, with an ostrich feather umbrella. Find out more (or at least as much as one can for such a secretive character) herehttps://www.timglister.com/And buy his fabulous new book right herehttps://bit.ly/30aJaY1 Music by Dano songs (and Jon) Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

We invite poet Kate Fox back on the podcast to critique our work and help us improve our poetry. Which Failing Writer will come out on top? Find out in this week's exiting episode. (That's not a typo. After listening to our poems, you'll be pretty keen to leave). Enjoy dearest listener, enjoy! If you're joining in with NANOWRIMO (or doing any writing at all) here's that handy little tool to stop you wasting time selecting character names. https://www.name-generator.org.uk/Music by Dano Songs Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Congratulations to the winner of our Halloween Flash Fiction competition! What? You don’t know who that is? Well, sounds like you need to get your old flappy head trumpets round this episode doesn’t it? Enjoy!Music by Dano Songs Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Crazy kids names, rejection, tortoises - that's what writing for children and inspiring them to develop a passion for reading and writing is all about. We catch up with children's author Adam Bushnell to find out a bit more about writing for kids, teaching teachers and... well, look, we're not just going to tell you everything that's in this episode, are we? You'll have to listen to it. http://www.adambushnell.co.uk/ https://www.wigtownbookfestival.com/ Tips for watching Jon perform Shakespeare - https://academyoffencingmasters.com/blog/fencing-with-glasses/ Diary of a bookseller - https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=jGFljyfORi8 Music by Dano Songs Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Thinking. It's hard. And this week we prove it. Join us at the start of a journey of creation. Like the big bang... but probably significantly smaller in terms of impact on the universe. And before you listen, try to guess which Sunday evening TV classic that we decide would be better equestrianised. Music by Dano songs...and Jon Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

We welcome super talented (and all round super nice chap) writer and illustrator Jason Cockcroft on to the podcast to talk about his latest book, We Were Wolves. And, not to be outdone by Jason's fancy pen work, we try and draw a cow. Jason's artwork - https://www.thelittleyellowbird.co.uk/ We Were Wolves book - https://www.waterstones.com/book/we-were-wolves/jason-cockcroft/jason-cockcroft/9781839130571 Music by Dano Songs Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

It's here and we want you to be part of it! Our £100 Halloween flash fiction contest is now open! Just listen to this episode to get your ears round the phrase you need to include in your entry... and get writing! Plus, we've got fantastic flash fictioner Tim Craig on to give us all a few top tips on how to write great micro fiction stories. Enjoy!Find out more about our guest herehttps://twitter.com/timkcraigMore short form top tips from this fella (not to be confused with the other Gaffney)https://www.davidgaffney.org/Music by Dano Songs Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

This week we've got a big announcement, a great interview with Rosie Wilby, author of The Breakup Monologues, and there's also a rather sizeable announcement. Oh, did I mention we're announcing something? That's in there too. Find out more about our fabulous guest herehttps://www.rosiewilby.com/You can get her even fabulouser new book herehttps://www.amazon.co.uk/Breakup-Monologues-Unexpected-Joy-Heartbreak/dp/1472982304 And listen to her ridiculously fabulous (though not quite as fabulous as ours) podcast herehttps://podcasts.apple.com/gb/podcast/the-breakup-monologues-with-rosie-wilby/id1310409996Have a go at writing for an hour with the, um, writers hour https://writershour.com/And finally, get all the details of our BIG ANNOUNCEMENT here https://www.failingwriterspodcast.com/blog/ Music by Dano songs Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

This week we yet again prove we couldn't arrange an over consumption of alcoholic beverages in a place that makes alcoholic beverages, and we do it in the company of a special mystery guest who's primed and ready to give us some honest feedback on some previous writing we've done. It's all very exciting. https://www.amazon.co.uk/Deadly-Caller-gripping-thriller-Detective/dp/B09F1CZTKS/ref=tmm_pap_swatch_0?_encoding=UTF8&qid=&sr=Music by Dano Songs Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Another great guest this week, in the form of Gillian McAllister. Sunday Times best-selling author, with the TV royalty seal of approval from Richard and Judy, she chats about her journey, her work and the philosophical musings of Taylor Swift. Read all about Gilly herehttps://gillianmcallister.com/Buy her latest smash hit best seller herehttps://www.amazon.co.uk/That-Night-gripping-psychological-thriller/dp/1405942444/ref=tmm_pap_swatch_0?_encoding=UTF8&qid=&sr=See her on the Richard & Judy Book Club herehttps://www.richardandjudy.co.uk/And listen to her on The Honest Authors Podcast herehttps://podcasts.apple.com/gb/podcast/the-honest-authors-podcast/id1194154338Music by Dano songs Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

In this week's bl**dy episode, Jon reviews the mega-f***ing-successful screen-writing guide "Save the cat" - and then we have a motherf***ing chat about swearing. Listener discretion is f***ing well advised. https://savethecat.com/https://www.theguardian.com/uk-news/2021/aug/20/bloody-loses-its-place-atop-swearing-lexicon-as-british-use-of-expletives-fallsMusic by Dano Songs Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Well, despite somehow failing to record the first 30 minutes of the interview, we still manage to have a rather interesting chat with TV comedy scriptwriter Adrian Poynton about his work and his adventures in the world of American TV in Los Angeles. Music by Dano Songs Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

After entering a micro-fiction contest Tom, Jon and Dave rather maturely consider the judge's feedback, and deal with it in a level-headed and sensible fashion. Kind of. Apart from the stupid bits where the stupid judges stupidly got their stupid facts wrong. Welcome to Whingefest '21! Music by Dano Songs Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Some people thought it couldn't be done... they were wrong. Some said no-one would be daft enough to turn up... they were wrong too!! And some people said we wouldn't be able to create the greatest story EVER with nothing more than our wits and a willing audience. They were mostly possibly right, but it didn't stop us having a right old load of fun trying. Enjoy!! Music by Dan-o Songs Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

It's a half and half treat this week! Half book review ("The Hidden Tools of Comedy" by Steve Kaplan) and half interview - a lovely natter with novelist, and writer of "A Very Nice Rejection Letter", Chris Paling. In addition to this we obviously also briefly discuss Lion dressage. https://www.chrispaling.com/ https://www.kaplancomedy.com/product/book/ Music by Dan-o Songs Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Ouhhhhhhh... it's a spooooooky horror episode! This week we present back our short horror stories. Then we try and teach Dave how to give something marks out of ten. (We have no idea if we did a good job of that. I mean, he gave us an 7/10... but who knows). Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

This week we're joined by the superb Kate Fox, poet extraordinaire. Kate shows us around the secret world of poetry, enjoys Dave's catchphrase (I mean, what right thinking individual wouldn't?!) and she definitely doesn't violently drown someone shortly after chatting with us. Plus, Kate reveals which famous comedy favourite she inspired to get on stage and tell some gags.https://katefoxwriter.wordpress.com/Music by Dano Songs Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

This week, we talk to brilliant thriller-mystery-horror writer C.J. Tudor. Topics covered: Dog walking, the 1980s and what it's like when one of the biggest authors in the world decides to say something rather nice about your book.Music by Dano Songs Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

This week (as the more astute of you may have gathered from the title of this episode) we talk about rejections – including a surprise for Tom and Jon that Dave has been keeping up his sleeve for over a decade! Plus there's an exciting announcement about our first live show. Enjoy!Music by Dano Songs Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

This week we talk to multi-talented writer Caimh McDonnell about hecklers, dogs and successful self publishing. And we witness a huge moment in the history of podcasting; the release of Dave's brand new catchphrase! https://whitehairedirishman.com/podcast/ https://whitehairedirishman.com/caimhs_books/ https://davidgaughran.com/ Gary Delaney - https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=qja1VIOBVcs Music by Dano Songs Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

What's a log line? How are they useful? How should you do them? These are all questions we really should have considered before recording a podcast about them. But as you'll hear, we get through it ok and actually find it really useful in the end. Plus, look out for an exclusive "arboreal narrative" reveal from Jon and the real highlight of the whole episode; Dave trying to be cool by making sounds like he's about to swallow a wasp.Music by Dano Songs Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

We thoroughly enjoy a lovely chinwag with Beth Chalmers this week. She's a hugely successful writer with sketch shows, dramas, programmes like Horrible Histories and much, much more to her name. We talk about what goes on behind the scenes, the pitching process and eventually we manage to squeeze some top tips out of her too. Enjoy!!Beth's current TV series "Mystic" (co-written with long time collaborator Amy Shindler) is currently on the iplayerhttps://www.bbc.co.uk/iplayer/episodes/m000kxr2/mystic Music by Dano Songs Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.