The Dynamics Of Everyday Life

Today I’m delighted to welcome another guest to the show, Vicky Quinn Fraser.  Vicky is the MicroBook Magician. She knows the ideas hiding in your head deserve their own space between their own covers on their very own bookshelf — and she understands how to drag, coax, and tweezer those ideas out and into the story only you could tell. She’s the creator of MicroBook Magic, author of 4 books, ghostwriter of dozens, and shepherd to multiple dozens of other people’s beautiful books. When she’s not writing or coaching, she can be found dangling from a trapeze or peering at beetles in the undergrowth.You can find her on LinkedIn at Vicky Quinn Fraser and sign up to her (highly recommended!) email list here:  https://moxiebooks.co.uk/freebies/Here are the highlights of this episode:(2.46) The main blockers to writing a book(4.45) I don’t know enough to write a book(8.50) Who writes most of the books out there(12.53) The importance of stories(17.40) Going off at tangents(27.05) Tips for writing a bookConnect with Julia:WebsiteLinkedInInstagramABOUT THE PODCASTThe Dynamics of Everyday Life explores the psychological patterns shaping how we think, work and relate to others; bringing psychodynamic thinking into coaching, leadership and everyday life.If you're a coach interested in learning more about psychodynamic approaches to coaching, you can explore Julia's training programmes on her website.FOLLOW THE PODCASTIf you're enjoying The Dynamics of Everyday Life, follow the podcast on your listening app so you don't miss future episodes.

We often find inspiration when we are away from our desks and this week’s episode is no exception.  I’ve taken up a new hobby to help with my confidence and, in the words of Julie Andrews, “start at the very beginning, it’s a very good place to start”.  And it was during a practice session that my teacher said something that stopped me in my tracks.We all have belief patterns that keep us safe and tell us we are only capable of so much.  But this really isn’t true.  Sometimes we need someone to hold up a mirror to what we can achieve.  Join me as I explore what might be going on from a psychodynamic perspective, and Matteo and Stan might pop up to help us too.Here are the highlights for this episode:(1.06) Learning new things(2.02) The step around(5.40) Defence mechanisms coming out to play(6.12) Validation and permissionConnect with Julia:WebsiteLinkedInInstagramABOUT THE PODCASTThe Dynamics of Everyday Life explores the psychological patterns shaping how we think, work and relate to others; bringing psychodynamic thinking into coaching, leadership and everyday life.If you're a coach interested in learning more about psychodynamic approaches to coaching, you can explore Julia's training programmes on her website.FOLLOW THE PODCASTIf you're enjoying The Dynamics of Everyday Life, follow the podcast on your listening app so you don't miss future episodes.

“Lovely weather we are having”.  We love to point out to other people what we are all experiencing.  It isn’t just the weather that we state the obvious about.  Anything is up for grabs in our bid to communicate.Why do we state the obvious?  Are we even aware that we are doing this?  In this episode I explore what might be happening for us when we communicate this way, using the metaphor of tennis commentary.  There’s a few of the greats that we meet along the way.Here are the highlights of this episode:(0.30) The arrival of the tennis season(1.53) Martina Navratilova(3.38) Stating the obvious(4.25) Anxiety(6.20) Learning and constructive criticismConnect with Julia:WebsiteLinkedInInstagramABOUT THE PODCASTThe Dynamics of Everyday Life explores the psychological patterns shaping how we think, work and relate to others; bringing psychodynamic thinking into coaching, leadership and everyday life.If you're a coach interested in learning more about psychodynamic approaches to coaching, you can explore Julia's training programmes on her website.FOLLOW THE PODCASTIf you're enjoying The Dynamics of Everyday Life, follow the podcast on your listening app so you don't miss future episodes.

Procrastination.  It’s something we all find ourselves up against.  But what if it’s more than being lazy or wanting to avoid something?  In this episode I explore what might be going on for us when we drag our feet.Don’t be put off by the title.  I do talk about my tax return, but to help us understand why we might be tripping ourselves up, not in a way that’s going to send you to sleep – or at least I hope not!Here are the highlights of this episode:(0.25) Procrastination(1.38) How you do anything is how you do everything, or not(3.21) The repetition compulsion(6.48) Asking for what we needConnect with Julia:WebsiteLinkedInInstagramABOUT THE PODCASTThe Dynamics of Everyday Life explores the psychological patterns shaping how we think, work and relate to others; bringing psychodynamic thinking into coaching, leadership and everyday life.If you're a coach interested in learning more about psychodynamic approaches to coaching, you can explore Julia's training programmes on her website.FOLLOW THE PODCASTIf you're enjoying The Dynamics of Everyday Life, follow the podcast on your listening app so you don't miss future episodes.

Do we always know what makes us happy?  Sometimes we do, and sometimes we don’t.  And sometimes our defence mechanisms can cause us to cut our noses off to spite our faces.If you’ve ever dug your heels in when a friend or relative has given you an opinion that you know is probably true, but you don’t want to think about, then this episode is for you.Here are the highlights of this episode(1.40) Training lorry drivers(2.20) Being competent doesn’t necessarily make you happy(4.11) Man with the hat(6.08) Sometimes we don’t know what’s making us unhappyConnect with Julia:WebsiteLinkedInInstagramABOUT THE PODCASTThe Dynamics of Everyday Life explores the psychological patterns shaping how we think, work and relate to others; bringing psychodynamic thinking into coaching, leadership and everyday life.If you're a coach interested in learning more about psychodynamic approaches to coaching, you can explore Julia's training programmes on her website.FOLLOW THE PODCASTIf you're enjoying The Dynamics of Everyday Life, follow the podcast on your listening app so you don't miss future episodes.

How many times have you been annoyed by other passengers getting in your way?  Possibly more than you would like to admit?  It happens to all of us and can have an impact on how we move forward, both literally and metaphorically.  In this episode I explore what’s going on for us in these situations and how we can get some control back.You’ll be pleased to know that we are back in some familiar psychodynamic territory, transference and our old friends denial and rationalisation come out to play.  Just in time for us to have a think about before our summer holidays.Here are the highlights of this episode:(3.06) Disruptive passengers in life(6.00) Defence mechanisms and boundaries(9.11) Moving forward and setting boundariesConnect with Julia:WebsiteLinkedInInstagramABOUT THE PODCASTThe Dynamics of Everyday Life explores the psychological patterns shaping how we think, work and relate to others; bringing psychodynamic thinking into coaching, leadership and everyday life.If you're a coach interested in learning more about psychodynamic approaches to coaching, you can explore Julia's training programmes on her website.FOLLOW THE PODCASTIf you're enjoying The Dynamics of Everyday Life, follow the podcast on your listening app so you don't miss future episodes.

What is it like to be a parent of a child with autism?  Whilst there is a lot more information out there than there used to be, it still can be quite a lonely place for parents.  In this episode I’m talking to fellow SEN parent, Del Parsons, about what we have learnt along the way and why we are best placed to advocate for our children.Del is ‘The No-Nonsense Business Coach and Marketing Mentor’ who’s on a mission to give business owners and founders the skills, confidence and self-belief to market their business and sell their stuff in a way that feels good for them! As well as being a coach and mentor Del also has a property portfolio and is part of an aviation business which she runs with her husband. She’s built businesses with 8 figure revenues for herself, as well as for clients, so can apply the lessons learnt across the board.You can get in touch with Del at:Website: Delparsonscoaching.co.ukEmail: [email protected]: Del ParsonsInstagram: DelparsonscoachingFacebook: Del ParsonsHere are the highlights of this episode:(5.30) Relief at diagnosis(10.35) The assumptions people make(15.15) You know your child(21.24) A bit of controversy(34.10) Advocate for your childConnect with Julia:WebsiteLinkedInInstagramABOUT THE PODCASTThe Dynamics of Everyday Life explores the psychological patterns shaping how we think, work and relate to others; bringing psychodynamic thinking into coaching, leadership and everyday life.If you're a coach interested in learning more about psychodynamic approaches to coaching, you can explore Julia's training programmes on her website.FOLLOW THE PODCASTIf you're enjoying The Dynamics of Everyday Life, follow the podcast on your listening app so you don't miss future episodes.

I’m delighted to be welcoming another guest to the show today, fellow coach Kate Adey.  We discuss what it means to be in control, how much control we do have and what role anxiety plays for us.  Join us as we explore the narratives we construct for ourselves and how we can reframe our stories. Kate works with leaders in professional services navigating the challenges of a busy career and home life, helping them reconnect with the freedom and flow of their true nature. You can connect with kate either via LinkedIn (linkedin.com/in/kateadey) or via email ([email protected]).Here are the highlights of this episode:(4.23) Beyond our limitations(7.58) The illusion of not having control(11.41) Byron Katie(20.51) The link between anxiety and controlConnect with Julia:WebsiteLinkedInInstagramABOUT THE PODCASTThe Dynamics of Everyday Life explores the psychological patterns shaping how we think, work and relate to others; bringing psychodynamic thinking into coaching, leadership and everyday life.If you're a coach interested in learning more about psychodynamic approaches to coaching, you can explore Julia's training programmes on her website.FOLLOW THE PODCASTIf you're enjoying The Dynamics of Everyday Life, follow the podcast on your listening app so you don't miss future episodes.

I’m delighted to be bringing another guest to the show today, Penny Hopkinson.  Penny is an Operations Manual specialist and author of Manual Magic.  Join us as we delve into the world of learning and discover why it’s changed so much over the generations.Here’s how you can get in touch with Penny:LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/in/pennyhopkinsonEverything under one ‘roof': www.linktr.ee/pennyhopkinsonHere are the highlights for this episode:(2.22) 30% of global workforce under 30(8.21) The single source of truth(10.31) Five generations under one workplace(30.01) The importance of consistencyConnect with Julia:WebsiteLinkedInInstagramABOUT THE PODCASTThe Dynamics of Everyday Life explores the psychological patterns shaping how we think, work and relate to others; bringing psychodynamic thinking into coaching, leadership and everyday life.If you're a coach interested in learning more about psychodynamic approaches to coaching, you can explore Julia's training programmes on her website.FOLLOW THE PODCASTIf you're enjoying The Dynamics of Everyday Life, follow the podcast on your listening app so you don't miss future episodes.

Today I’m welcoming another guest to the show, Simon Bennett.  Simon is a friend of mine, a fellow coach and is keen to bring the concept of kindness to our attention.  Simon’s coaching practice builds on his experience of leading teams in high pressure organisations. He is passionate about working with leaders to best navigate the challenges and opportunities of the modern working world.  Simon shares a home in London with his husband, and teaches Aikido, a Japanese martial art. Simon is an Affiliate member of the European Mentoring and Coaching Council. Simon would love to hear any thoughts or feedback on the podcast, or any enquiries about working together in coaching. You can learn more about his work at www.sbennett.uk and email him at [email protected] us as we delve into what kindness means at home and at work, and how we can be more kind to ourselves and others.Here are the highlights of this episode:(5.16) Trying to fix the world to fix yourself(10.14) Boundaries(12.20) Authority structures(14.35) Kindness in the workplace(19.40) Everyone deserves to prioritise kindness for themselvesConnect with Julia:WebsiteLinkedInInstagramABOUT THE PODCASTThe Dynamics of Everyday Life explores the psychological patterns shaping how we think, work and relate to others; bringing psychodynamic thinking into coaching, leadership and everyday life.If you're a coach interested in learning more about psychodynamic approaches to coaching, you can explore Julia's training programmes on her website.FOLLOW THE PODCASTIf you're enjoying The Dynamics of Everyday Life, follow the podcast on your listening app so you don't miss future episodes.

This week’s episode marks a special occasion—both my birthday and the podcast’s one-year anniversary! We’re exploring the dynamics of birthdays: what they mean to us, the expectations we place on them, and how they reveal our deeper unconscious patterns. Freud wasn’t a fan of birthdays (except for the gifts!), and that got me thinking; how do we truly feel about getting older?Plus, I share some reflections on personal growth, the stories we tell ourselves, and why birthdays can be a great moment to check in with where we are in life.I’m launching a new course, Psychodynamics for Beginners! Initially designed for coaches, but soon to be available for anyone curious about how psychodynamic theory can help them make better choices in their everyday lives.  Click here for more info:https://mailchi.mp/5344a338c710/psychodynamics-for-beginnersHere are the highlights of this episode:(0.34) How Freud felt about birthdays(2.40) Bridget Jones(3.07) Are we where we want to be?(6.21) How other people respond to our birthdaysConnect with Julia:WebsiteLinkedInInstagramABOUT THE PODCASTThe Dynamics of Everyday Life explores the psychological patterns shaping how we think, work and relate to others; bringing psychodynamic thinking into coaching, leadership and everyday life.If you're a coach interested in learning more about psychodynamic approaches to coaching, you can explore Julia's training programmes on her website.FOLLOW THE PODCASTIf you're enjoying The Dynamics of Everyday Life, follow the podcast on your listening app so you don't miss future episodes.

Why does silence make us uncomfortable? We’ve all been in those moments where the quiet stretches just a little too long, and we feel the need to fill it. But what if silence isn’t empty at all? What if it’s one of the most powerful tools we have?In this episode, we explore the impact of silence, when it serves us, when it doesn’t, and how to use it to our advantage. We’ll also learn what Freud thought about it, why my son used it as a form of protest, and how silence can be both a gift and a weapon.Here are the highlights of this episode:(0.56) The paradox of silence on a podcast(1.17) What I thought good listening was(1.51) Silence as a response(3.37) The silent treatment(4.15) Freud’s take on silence(6.49) It’s always about the other personNew Training Course: Psychodynamics for BeginnersI’m launching a new course designed to make psychodynamic theory accessible—so we’re not just relying on social media soundbites to understand ourselves. Initially aimed at coaches, but soon available to a wider audience. If you’re interested, subscribe to my newsletter or book a chat with me for more details.  https://calendly.com/dynamicseverydaylife/30minConnect with Julia:WebsiteLinkedInInstagramABOUT THE PODCASTThe Dynamics of Everyday Life explores the psychological patterns shaping how we think, work and relate to others; bringing psychodynamic thinking into coaching, leadership and everyday life.If you're a coach interested in learning more about psychodynamic approaches to coaching, you can explore Julia's training programmes on her website.FOLLOW THE PODCASTIf you're enjoying The Dynamics of Everyday Life, follow the podcast on your listening app so you don't miss future episodes.

In this episode, I’m sharing a personal story about how my confidence took a hit, how I unknowingly held myself back, and what ultimately helped me rebuild my sense of self. Spoiler alert: it involves pole dancing, platform boots, and a whole lot of fun!We’ll have a look at how our defence mechanisms get in our way and how they can subtly keep us stuck. Plus, I’ll invite you to reflect on where you might be self-sabotaging and what small (or big!) steps you can take to reclaim your confidence and joy.Here are the highlights of this episode:(1.40) The moment I realised my confidence had taken a knock(2.10) The surprising impact of stepping out of my comfort zone (hello, pole dancing!)(5.03) Building ourselves back up from adversity(6.09) Why we can get over busy at timesMy invitation for you to consider this week is where in your life are you holding yourself back? What stories are keeping you stuck? I encourage you to explore what’s stopping you and to take one step, big or small, towards moving forwards. If you enjoyed this episode, don’t forget to subscribe, share, and leave a review. I’d love to hear what your ‘fabulous boots’ moment looks like! Connect with Julia:WebsiteLinkedInInstagramABOUT THE PODCASTThe Dynamics of Everyday Life explores the psychological patterns shaping how we think, work and relate to others; bringing psychodynamic thinking into coaching, leadership and everyday life.If you're a coach interested in learning more about psychodynamic approaches to coaching, you can explore Julia's training programmes on her website.FOLLOW THE PODCASTIf you're enjoying The Dynamics of Everyday Life, follow the podcast on your listening app so you don't miss future episodes.

How often have you found yourself mid-story, only to realise you’ve completely lost track of the point you were trying to make? You’re not alone. Sometimes, our words take on a life of their own, and there’s usually something deeper going on beneath the surface.In this episode, I take a look at why I (and maybe you, too) sometimes talk in circles, what this has to do with defence mechanisms, and the unexpected realisation I had during a discovery call. We’ll also touch on why excitement isn’t always excitement and how a simple question stopped me in my tracks.Here are the highlights of this episode:(0.27) Why do we verbally process?(1.27) FOMO and panic(3.15) The desire to connect(5.32) The unexpected fear behind my excitement(6.49) Denial and the link to reaction formationLooking at ourselves at this level can feel unsettling, so take your time with it. And if you’d like extra support, I’ve put together a resource sheet to help. You’ll find the link below.Connect with Julia:WebsiteLinkedInInstagramABOUT THE PODCASTThe Dynamics of Everyday Life explores the psychological patterns shaping how we think, work and relate to others; bringing psychodynamic thinking into coaching, leadership and everyday life.If you're a coach interested in learning more about psychodynamic approaches to coaching, you can explore Julia's training programmes on her website.FOLLOW THE PODCASTIf you're enjoying The Dynamics of Everyday Life, follow the podcast on your listening app so you don't miss future episodes.

Today I’m delighted to welcome Gwenne Dickson, spiritual empowerment coach, to the show.  Gwenne and I are tackling a subject that all of us will experience and yet so many of us find difficult; and that’s grief.  Join us as we talk about what we find surprising about the grieving process and how we can support each other during these times.You can contact Gwenne at:Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/livingyourbestlifegwennehttps://www.facebook.com/groups/35568229478Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/livingyourbestlife888/LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/in/gwenne-dickson/Here are the highlights of this episode:(4.40) Connecting with our higher selves(8.20) Making meanings out of things(10.20) Keeping a lot to ourselves(16.20) The unexpected things(20.40) Not allowing ourselves to move onConnect with Julia:WebsiteLinkedInInstagramABOUT THE PODCASTThe Dynamics of Everyday Life explores the psychological patterns shaping how we think, work and relate to others; bringing psychodynamic thinking into coaching, leadership and everyday life.If you're a coach interested in learning more about psychodynamic approaches to coaching, you can explore Julia's training programmes on her website.FOLLOW THE PODCASTIf you're enjoying The Dynamics of Everyday Life, follow the podcast on your listening app so you don't miss future episodes.

Why do we wear shoes that hurt our feet?  We’ve all been in the situation where we’ve known that our choice of footwear isn’t ideal, but we love how our shoes make us look and feel, so put up with the pain.  Is this the only area of our lives that we do this, or can we see this elsewhere?  In this episode we explore what might be going on for us when we put on shoes (metaphorical or otherwise) that pinch our feet.  We’ll also learn what Marilyn Monroe thinks and why I don’t travel in heels anymore.Here are the highlights of this episode:(1.50) Travelling in heels(3.36) Marilyn Monroe(4.59) Denial(5.10) RepressionConnect with Julia:WebsiteLinkedInInstagramABOUT THE PODCASTThe Dynamics of Everyday Life explores the psychological patterns shaping how we think, work and relate to others; bringing psychodynamic thinking into coaching, leadership and everyday life.If you're a coach interested in learning more about psychodynamic approaches to coaching, you can explore Julia's training programmes on her website.FOLLOW THE PODCASTIf you're enjoying The Dynamics of Everyday Life, follow the podcast on your listening app so you don't miss future episodes.

It’s been famously said by Reed Hastings, CEO of Netflix, that Netflix is not a family.  And work is not a family - unless of course you are the Carringtons in Dynasty or the Ewings in Dallas.  However, are there some elements of family dynamics that get played out in our work environments?In this episode we explore the phenomena of being drawn into work scenarios that remind us of our family of origin.  We find out why we might want to shove some people off Waltons Mountain, how I agree with my mother-in-law and if we are going back to the DIY store for milk.  And Barry from accounts makes a welcome return.Here are the highlights of this episode:(2.12) Who are we trying to convince?(3.47) Being part of a system(5.16) Sibling rivalry(6.19) TransferenceConnect with Julia:WebsiteLinkedInInstagramABOUT THE PODCASTThe Dynamics of Everyday Life explores the psychological patterns shaping how we think, work and relate to others; bringing psychodynamic thinking into coaching, leadership and everyday life.If you're a coach interested in learning more about psychodynamic approaches to coaching, you can explore Julia's training programmes on her website.FOLLOW THE PODCASTIf you're enjoying The Dynamics of Everyday Life, follow the podcast on your listening app so you don't miss future episodes.

Life isn’t a fairy tale, yet we might have some fairy tale moments throughout our lives.  What happens when we reach the conclusion of the fairy tale?  Are we skipping off into the sunset or are we left with a mixed bag of conflicting  and complex feelings not knowing what might be going on for us?In this episode we explore some of the less talked about emotions that we experience once the fairy tale has ended.  We’ll be staring anxiety in the face and exploring why guilt can be a stepping stone into the defence mechanisms.  And Dorothy Parker also pops up amongst the fairy tale characters to help us make sense of our feelings.  I bet that’s something she never thought she would be doing…Here are the highlights for this episode:(3.09) Do Cinderella and Prince Charming live happily ever after?(3.30) Anxiety(3.51) Guilt(6.54) Questioning our own identityConnect with Julia:WebsiteLinkedInInstagramABOUT THE PODCASTThe Dynamics of Everyday Life explores the psychological patterns shaping how we think, work and relate to others; bringing psychodynamic thinking into coaching, leadership and everyday life.If you're a coach interested in learning more about psychodynamic approaches to coaching, you can explore Julia's training programmes on her website.FOLLOW THE PODCASTIf you're enjoying The Dynamics of Everyday Life, follow the podcast on your listening app so you don't miss future episodes.

Most of us will have had the post break up haircut, or equivalent.  That response to an event that has made us decide that something needs to change as we are no longer that person anymore.  But why do we do this?  Are we avoiding thinking about something that could actually help us move forward?In this episode we explore what might be going on for us as we reach for the scissors, or throw out all our clothes.  We’ll look at what defence mechanisms could be getting in our way and why we are feeling anxious.  And why was I trying to look like a kids tv presenter?Here are the highlights of this episode:(2.23) Why do we decide on a post break up haircut?(4.38) Denial(6.04) Rationalisation(6.44) SublimationConnect with Julia:WebsiteLinkedInInstagramABOUT THE PODCASTThe Dynamics of Everyday Life explores the psychological patterns shaping how we think, work and relate to others; bringing psychodynamic thinking into coaching, leadership and everyday life.If you're a coach interested in learning more about psychodynamic approaches to coaching, you can explore Julia's training programmes on her website.FOLLOW THE PODCASTIf you're enjoying The Dynamics of Everyday Life, follow the podcast on your listening app so you don't miss future episodes.

It’s tempting to think that we should always be moving forward, that we must forever be making progress, no matter how slowly.  And there is a lot of truth in that.  Our defence mechanisms can tempt us to avoid looking at our behaviour with the promise that by continuing to move forward we will get to the promised land – whatever that might look like for us.In this episode I’ll be inviting you to consider what defence mechanisms might have come out to play for you over the festive period and what they might be telling you.  Roland Rat, Tufty the Squirrel (remember him?!) and A1 all join us along the way.  What’s not to enjoy?Here are the highlights of this episode:(1.22) No “new year, new me”(3.00) How did you feel when the OOO went on?(4.24) Denial (7.54) RegressionConnect with Julia:WebsiteLinkedInInstagramABOUT THE PODCASTThe Dynamics of Everyday Life explores the psychological patterns shaping how we think, work and relate to others; bringing psychodynamic thinking into coaching, leadership and everyday life.If you're a coach interested in learning more about psychodynamic approaches to coaching, you can explore Julia's training programmes on her website.FOLLOW THE PODCASTIf you're enjoying The Dynamics of Everyday Life, follow the podcast on your listening app so you don't miss future episodes.

Why do we feel alive around some people and like we’ve been through the wringer when we are around others?  What’s going on for us when some people lift us up and with others we can feel as if it’s they have dropped us from a great height?  In this episode I’m exploring what’s going on from a psychodynamic perspective when we take on the energy of other people and consider ways that we can manage this so that we can feel better.Along the way we’ll meet the Grinch, the Dementors from Harry Potter, James Bond and Stan Wawrinka.  Now that would be a night out…Here are the highlights of this episode:(1.02) Feeling like the Grinch(4.07) Recollections may vary(5.12) Transference(8.34) ProjectionConnect with Julia:WebsiteLinkedInInstagramABOUT THE PODCASTThe Dynamics of Everyday Life explores the psychological patterns shaping how we think, work and relate to others; bringing psychodynamic thinking into coaching, leadership and everyday life.If you're a coach interested in learning more about psychodynamic approaches to coaching, you can explore Julia's training programmes on her website.FOLLOW THE PODCASTIf you're enjoying The Dynamics of Everyday Life, follow the podcast on your listening app so you don't miss future episodes.

How do we feel when someone makes a comment about us?  There are probably times when we can brush it off and not think about it again, and there are others where we end up ruminating over it for days afterwards.  But what’s going on in the making of these comments?  Are they just as innocuous as the person who made them (possibly) believes?  Or is there something deeper at play here?In this episode I put these comments under the psychodynamic spotlight to see if we can understand what is happening.  We take a trip to Waltons’ mountain and learn why these days I’m more likely to be wearing glittery leggings instead of neon fruit print ones. What’s not to enjoy?Here are the highlights of this episode:(2.06) The mohair jumper scenario(4.02) Defence mechanism bingo(8.43) Awareness is key(10.40) Setting boundariesConnect with Julia:WebsiteLinkedInInstagramABOUT THE PODCASTThe Dynamics of Everyday Life explores the psychological patterns shaping how we think, work and relate to others; bringing psychodynamic thinking into coaching, leadership and everyday life.If you're a coach interested in learning more about psychodynamic approaches to coaching, you can explore Julia's training programmes on her website.FOLLOW THE PODCASTIf you're enjoying The Dynamics of Everyday Life, follow the podcast on your listening app so you don't miss future episodes.

It’s an easy trap to fall into, thinking we should be brilliant at everything the minute we try it, and then berating ourselves when we aren’t.  What’s happening for us when we set ourselves up in this way?  What stories are we telling ourselves about where we think we should be?In this episode I explore the psychodynamics behind the ‘comparisonitis’ and why we can create false narratives around our growth and achievements. We’ll take a trip through reality television shows and Anne Widdecombe will be dancing the light fantastic.  What’s not to enjoy?Here are the highlights of this episode:(3.38) What imposter syndrome really means(5.45) Conscious, preconscious and unconscious(8.34) Projection and projective identification(9.59) False expectations and idealsConnect with Julia:WebsiteLinkedInInstagramABOUT THE PODCASTThe Dynamics of Everyday Life explores the psychological patterns shaping how we think, work and relate to others; bringing psychodynamic thinking into coaching, leadership and everyday life.If you're a coach interested in learning more about psychodynamic approaches to coaching, you can explore Julia's training programmes on her website.FOLLOW THE PODCASTIf you're enjoying The Dynamics of Everyday Life, follow the podcast on your listening app so you don't miss future episodes.

How do we make sense of our worlds?  How do we understand what seems incomprehensible?  It’s no surprise to discover that we will create stories and meanings for what happens to us, in order for us to make sense of our worlds.  But why do we do this?  And is it any good for us?Find out what Freud has to do with a cotton wheel, learn why you might want to swap Nik Kershaw for Simon le Bon and discover why you will never find me in a trilby hat.  There’s a lot going on.Here are the highlights of this episode:(2.00) Creating meaning for ourselves(6.24) What is going on here?(7.25) The Fort/ Da game(10.05) This week’s invitationConnect with Julia:WebsiteLinkedInInstagramABOUT THE PODCASTThe Dynamics of Everyday Life explores the psychological patterns shaping how we think, work and relate to others; bringing psychodynamic thinking into coaching, leadership and everyday life.If you're a coach interested in learning more about psychodynamic approaches to coaching, you can explore Julia's training programmes on her website.FOLLOW THE PODCASTIf you're enjoying The Dynamics of Everyday Life, follow the podcast on your listening app so you don't miss future episodes.

There’s a million and one different things that distract us in our day to day lives.  Just putting this episode together I had to ensure that my phone was away and I had done everything that I needed to before I sat down to work.  Why do we do this?  Is it just that we live in a very busy world, or could there be some psychodynamic concepts playing into all this?Join me as I take a trip into the world of distraction, via the Champs-Élysées and my own coaching sessions.  We’ll find out exactly who Ricky is, and why did I become Miss Piggy for a moment?Here are the highlights of this episode:(4.20) Anna Freud(5.20) Repression(6.14) Displacement and Sublimation(9.20) Reaction FormationConnect with Julia:WebsiteLinkedInInstagramABOUT THE PODCASTThe Dynamics of Everyday Life explores the psychological patterns shaping how we think, work and relate to others; bringing psychodynamic thinking into coaching, leadership and everyday life.If you're a coach interested in learning more about psychodynamic approaches to coaching, you can explore Julia's training programmes on her website.FOLLOW THE PODCASTIf you're enjoying The Dynamics of Everyday Life, follow the podcast on your listening app so you don't miss future episodes.

What’s going on for us when we feel we need to hoover up all the food on the breakfast buffet?  Are we being selfish or are there other things at play for us?  In this episode I look at hoarding and what might be the psychodynamic reasons for us taking more than we actually need.Join me as I discover that cabaret at breakfast never disappoints, there wasn’t a great banana shortage of 2024,  and that Paddington Bear hard stares don’t work on everyone.Here are this episode’s highlights:(3.00) Why do people behave like this?(3.50) Unconscious meanings(6.00) Significant loss(7.35) Compulsion to repeatConnect with Julia:WebsiteLinkedInInstagramABOUT THE PODCASTThe Dynamics of Everyday Life explores the psychological patterns shaping how we think, work and relate to others; bringing psychodynamic thinking into coaching, leadership and everyday life.If you're a coach interested in learning more about psychodynamic approaches to coaching, you can explore Julia's training programmes on her website.FOLLOW THE PODCASTIf you're enjoying The Dynamics of Everyday Life, follow the podcast on your listening app so you don't miss future episodes.

I'm thrilled to welcome another guest to the show today, Rozalyn Willocks. Rozalyn is a Recruitment Director, career coach, mentor, and Amazon bestselling author of Get Your Career Unstuck. She’s here to discuss career transitions and to explore why many of us remain in unfulfilling jobs.Join us as we discuss all things career related from considering what makes us stay in jobs that leave us unfulfilled to why we no longer have Terry and June style work trajectories.If you'd like to connect with Rozalyn or learn more about her work, you can reach her here:http://www.rozalynwillocks.com [email protected] Here are the highlights of the episode:(5.15) Definition of success(17.24) Rationalisation(25.20) Workplace Stockholm syndrome(31.45) Job satisfaction wheelConnect with Julia:WebsiteLinkedInInstagramABOUT THE PODCASTThe Dynamics of Everyday Life explores the psychological patterns shaping how we think, work and relate to others; bringing psychodynamic thinking into coaching, leadership and everyday life.If you're a coach interested in learning more about psychodynamic approaches to coaching, you can explore Julia's training programmes on her website.FOLLOW THE PODCASTIf you're enjoying The Dynamics of Everyday Life, follow the podcast on your listening app so you don't miss future episodes.

Just in time for Halloween I am bringing out a ghosting special.  Ghosting is a particularly unkind and unfeeling way of treating people and can be extremely difficult to come to terms with.  Not every ghost is friendly like Casper…In this episode I’m exploring what ghosting is, why it happens and what we can do about it – whether we are the ones being ghosted, or even doing the ghosting ourselves.  We’ve also got our old favourite the defence mechanism bingo cards, Maya Angelou and Scooby Doo.  It’s a Halloween party not to be missed!Here are the highlights of this episode:(1.43) What is ghosting?(2.29) Why do people ghost?(6.38) What to do if you’ve been ghosted.(8.50) What should you do if you are tempted to ghost someone?Connect with Julia:WebsiteLinkedInInstagramABOUT THE PODCASTThe Dynamics of Everyday Life explores the psychological patterns shaping how we think, work and relate to others; bringing psychodynamic thinking into coaching, leadership and everyday life.If you're a coach interested in learning more about psychodynamic approaches to coaching, you can explore Julia's training programmes on her website.FOLLOW THE PODCASTIf you're enjoying The Dynamics of Everyday Life, follow the podcast on your listening app so you don't miss future episodes.

Freud found a huge amount of inspiration in Shakespeare’s works – so if it’s good enough for him, it’s definitely good enough for me.  This time we are delving into Hamlet to see what we can learn about narcissism.  This definitely won’t be the first time we use Hamlet as a reference point, as there’s so much in there!In this episode I explore why we might not challenge the fact that there is something rotten in the state of Denmark, how we can end up inadvertently supporting this and what can we do about it.  We might even get to discover a different defence mechanism.Here are the highlights of this episode:(1.45) Hamlet’s narcissism(5.36) Moralisation(7.10) Why do we follow the narcissist?(8.01) Where have you been adding to Denmark’s rotten state?Connect with Julia:WebsiteLinkedInInstagramABOUT THE PODCASTThe Dynamics of Everyday Life explores the psychological patterns shaping how we think, work and relate to others; bringing psychodynamic thinking into coaching, leadership and everyday life.If you're a coach interested in learning more about psychodynamic approaches to coaching, you can explore Julia's training programmes on her website.FOLLOW THE PODCASTIf you're enjoying The Dynamics of Everyday Life, follow the podcast on your listening app so you don't miss future episodes.

Can we always see what is right in front of us?  We might like to tell ourselves that we can, but this is not necessarily always the case.  Despite what we might like to believe.In this episode I explore why we might be avoiding what is staring us right in the face.  We’ll need our defence mechanism bingo cards again and we’ll be meeting Barry from accounts, Micky Flanagan and James Bond along the way.  Have a listen and avoid the cancel culture!Here are the highlights of this episode:(1.40) Defence mechanism bingo cards(2.04) Repression(5.39) Projection(7.30) UndoingConnect with Julia:WebsiteLinkedInInstagramABOUT THE PODCASTThe Dynamics of Everyday Life explores the psychological patterns shaping how we think, work and relate to others; bringing psychodynamic thinking into coaching, leadership and everyday life.If you're a coach interested in learning more about psychodynamic approaches to coaching, you can explore Julia's training programmes on her website.FOLLOW THE PODCASTIf you're enjoying The Dynamics of Everyday Life, follow the podcast on your listening app so you don't miss future episodes.

What does the Wizard of Oz and psychological ideas have in common?  Well, quite a bit – as long-time listeners of the show will be aware.  How can we learn about ourselves and others by thinking about Dorothy and her journey to the emerald city?In this episode I start my journey into understanding narcissism (there will be quite a few episodes!) and explore the well-known psychological concept of flying monkeys.  As well as avoiding the monkeys swooping around us it’s also time to get out of defence mechanism bingo cards again.Here are the highlights of this episode:(2.17) How to know if you are dealing with a flying monkey(4.10) Why do we get dropped like a hot potato?(5.37) Rationalisation(7.10) Have you been a flying monkey?Connect with Julia:WebsiteLinkedInInstagramABOUT THE PODCASTThe Dynamics of Everyday Life explores the psychological patterns shaping how we think, work and relate to others; bringing psychodynamic thinking into coaching, leadership and everyday life.If you're a coach interested in learning more about psychodynamic approaches to coaching, you can explore Julia's training programmes on her website.FOLLOW THE PODCASTIf you're enjoying The Dynamics of Everyday Life, follow the podcast on your listening app so you don't miss future episodes.

How many times have you been sent on training at work only to spend your time wishing you were anywhere else and panicking about the to do list that’s mounting up whilst you are away from your desk?In this week’s episode I talk to Sam Lancashire, founder of Creating Lightbulb Moments about her mission to rid the world of tick box training.  Join us as we discuss the worst types of training that we have been on, what it means to be voluntold to attend courses and why rehearsing is better than role playing.Sam is a high performing creative learning leader, mental health first aider and best-selling author on a mission to rid the world of low impact, tick box training, passionate about using her knowledge and experience to facilitate ‘Lightbulb Moments’ for people in need of a breakthrough - for many different reasons.  Sam also focuses on productivity and mindset as part of her Sales & Leadership Development Practice. She is a Fellow of the Learning & Performance Institute, a qualified coach, trainer and experienced mentor; supporting global teams and their leaders to impact business and personal performance for over 18 years.You can get in touch with Sam at:Linkedin: Samantha Lancashire FLPIInstagram: Creating Lightbulb MomentsHere are the highlights of this episode:(3.50) How do you want your team to feel on training?(12.19) Olympians(24.00) Withdrawing from training(35.45) How leaders and managers can get involvedConnect with Julia:WebsiteLinkedInInstagramABOUT THE PODCASTThe Dynamics of Everyday Life explores the psychological patterns shaping how we think, work and relate to others; bringing psychodynamic thinking into coaching, leadership and everyday life.If you're a coach interested in learning more about psychodynamic approaches to coaching, you can explore Julia's training programmes on her website.FOLLOW THE PODCASTIf you're enjoying The Dynamics of Everyday Life, follow the podcast on your listening app so you don't miss future episodes.

Why is it that on some days we find it easy to make decisions and on others we struggle to think what to eat for dinner?  Some choices might be incredibly simple, and others leave us baffled about what to do for what seems like hours.  And why does the chocolate at the supermarket till seem to speak to us more insistently than in other places?In this episode I explore what might be going on for us when we are finding ourselves overwhelmed with the decisions we need to make and what we can do about this.  We also discover when the best time is for me to be making matchstick models and learn why you might be getting socks from me at Christmas.Here are the highlights of this episode:(2.39) Decision fatigue is different from mental fatigue(3.24) The id, ego and superego(4.25) Ego depletion(7.41) Decisions with far reaching impactConnect with Julia:WebsiteLinkedInInstagramABOUT THE PODCASTThe Dynamics of Everyday Life explores the psychological patterns shaping how we think, work and relate to others; bringing psychodynamic thinking into coaching, leadership and everyday life.If you're a coach interested in learning more about psychodynamic approaches to coaching, you can explore Julia's training programmes on her website.FOLLOW THE PODCASTIf you're enjoying The Dynamics of Everyday Life, follow the podcast on your listening app so you don't miss future episodes.

Why do we find ourselves getting attached to scenarios more quickly than is helpful to us?  This can be an incredibly common experience for a lot of people and one that can cause us a lot of stress and of worry.  We can also feel like it’s only us that this happens to.In this episode I explore what might be going on for us when we are getting invested in situations and what we can do about this.  We also take a trip to Monte Carlo (if only!) and see what Marilyn Monroe has to say about the subject.  Here are the highlights of this episode:(1.23) Unmet needs(2.54) Defence mechanism bingo(5.12) A constant state of lack(5.52) Love bombingConnect with Julia:WebsiteLinkedInInstagramABOUT THE PODCASTThe Dynamics of Everyday Life explores the psychological patterns shaping how we think, work and relate to others; bringing psychodynamic thinking into coaching, leadership and everyday life.If you're a coach interested in learning more about psychodynamic approaches to coaching, you can explore Julia's training programmes on her website.FOLLOW THE PODCASTIf you're enjoying The Dynamics of Everyday Life, follow the podcast on your listening app so you don't miss future episodes.

With so much noise in both our virtual and our real worlds how do we know who we should be listening to? Should we block it all out and listen to ourselves, or can we work out where to go to for a sounding board?In this episode I explore why just listening to ourselves might not be the most helpful thing to do.  We return to our defence mechanism bingo cards, whilst saying hello to Marjory the trash heap and Roger Moore.  I also seem to be fighting with my brother… What’s not to enjoy?Here are the highlights of this episode:(1.42) Wilful blindness(5.52) Is it lovely to be told what to do?(7.41) Does everyone have your best interests at heart?(9.06) Who is on your team?Connect with Julia:WebsiteLinkedInInstagramABOUT THE PODCASTThe Dynamics of Everyday Life explores the psychological patterns shaping how we think, work and relate to others; bringing psychodynamic thinking into coaching, leadership and everyday life.If you're a coach interested in learning more about psychodynamic approaches to coaching, you can explore Julia's training programmes on her website.FOLLOW THE PODCASTIf you're enjoying The Dynamics of Everyday Life, follow the podcast on your listening app so you don't miss future episodes.

I’m excited to be bringing another guest to the show today, Sarah Manley.  Sarah is a coach, mentor and an Amazon bestselling author with her book Quiet Catalyst.    Sarah joins me to talk all things related to being an introvert including where we sit on the introversion/ extroversion spectrum, and how we can thrive in our relationships with other people, and at work once we have an idea what our needs are.  We also consider what psychodynamic mechanisms might be coming into play and Sarah shares some tips on to how to look after ourselves better.   If you would like to get in touch with Sarah and learn more about her work you can contact her here:Website: https://linktr.ee/thequietcatalystEmail: [email protected] are the highlights of this episode:(9.45) The assumption that people who are quiet in meetings have nothing to say(15.25) The introversion/ extroversion continuum(21.45) Managing boundaries around networking(28.10) Listening skills as an introvertConnect with Julia:WebsiteLinkedInInstagramABOUT THE PODCASTThe Dynamics of Everyday Life explores the psychological patterns shaping how we think, work and relate to others; bringing psychodynamic thinking into coaching, leadership and everyday life.If you're a coach interested in learning more about psychodynamic approaches to coaching, you can explore Julia's training programmes on her website.FOLLOW THE PODCASTIf you're enjoying The Dynamics of Everyday Life, follow the podcast on your listening app so you don't miss future episodes.

I’m excited to be bringing another guest to the show today, Marta Checko.  Marta has an inspiring story (or stories!) to tell about how she overcame significant challenges in her life.  There’s a lot to learn about resilience, the power of not giving up and how we are stronger than we think.If you would like to get in touch with Marta and learn more about her work you can contact her here:E-mail: [email protected] of Marta’s creative projects and ways to support others: LinktreeBlog where Marta shares her thoughts and reflections: SubstackLinkedIn/Instagram: @martachecko Here are the highlights of this episode:(4.37) Marta’s first challenge(10.18) Days of fighting with our inner selves(18.49) Marta’s second challenge(25.40) Taking a minute to breathConnect with Julia:WebsiteLinkedInInstagramABOUT THE PODCASTThe Dynamics of Everyday Life explores the psychological patterns shaping how we think, work and relate to others; bringing psychodynamic thinking into coaching, leadership and everyday life.If you're a coach interested in learning more about psychodynamic approaches to coaching, you can explore Julia's training programmes on her website.FOLLOW THE PODCASTIf you're enjoying The Dynamics of Everyday Life, follow the podcast on your listening app so you don't miss future episodes.

I’m delighted to welcome Tamzin Hall, neurodiversity champion and founder of The Neurodiversity Academy to the show today.  Tamzin is a leading neurodiversity consultant, trainer, and coach. She is a proud dyslexic and a #1 best-selling author. With decades of experience in leadership, learning and development, a Level 7 qualification in Coaching and Mentoring, and PCC certification, Tamzin helps leaders understand and support their neurodivergent staff.   She assists businesses in creating inclusive practices that empower neurodivergent employees, ensuring they feel valued and accepted. Join us as we talk about how to get it right when considering neurodivergence in the workplace, and how psychodynamics can help us understand our part in building strong relationships.You connect with Tamzin and learn more about her work at:Linkedin:  https://www.linkedin.com/in/tamzin-hall/Website: https://www.theneurodiversityacademy.com/Here are the highlights of this episode:(6.20) Meeting in the middle(16.10) Fear of getting it wrong(19.20) Work for an organisation that is doing this right(21.48) Having someone to go to who understandsConnect with Julia:WebsiteLinkedInInstagramABOUT THE PODCASTThe Dynamics of Everyday Life explores the psychological patterns shaping how we think, work and relate to others; bringing psychodynamic thinking into coaching, leadership and everyday life.If you're a coach interested in learning more about psychodynamic approaches to coaching, you can explore Julia's training programmes on her website.FOLLOW THE PODCASTIf you're enjoying The Dynamics of Everyday Life, follow the podcast on your listening app so you don't miss future episodes.

We all love a summer holiday – or at least that’s what we are led to believe.  But what if we don’t?  In this episode we explore what might be going on for us if we are feeling a bit anxious whilst we pack the sun cream and our bikinis, ready for our trips to sunnier climes.  Are we the only ones who feel this way?  (Quick spoiler – fortunately we aren’t!).There’s also Uncle Jonny fighting for some Christmas potatoes, and we’ll need our defence mechanism bingo cards again.Here are the highlights of this episode:(2.14) Travel anxiety(6.15) Regression(7.27) Repression(8.34) ProjectionConnect with Julia:WebsiteLinkedInInstagramABOUT THE PODCASTThe Dynamics of Everyday Life explores the psychological patterns shaping how we think, work and relate to others; bringing psychodynamic thinking into coaching, leadership and everyday life.If you're a coach interested in learning more about psychodynamic approaches to coaching, you can explore Julia's training programmes on her website.FOLLOW THE PODCASTIf you're enjoying The Dynamics of Everyday Life, follow the podcast on your listening app so you don't miss future episodes.

The yellow brick road is a fabulous analogy of the different journeys in our lives.  But how tempting could it be to take a short cut?  We all have our own personal witches that we want to avoid, but would we even do this by cutting some corners?In this episode I explore what might be going on for Dorothy and her friends as she makes her way to the emerald city.  I introduce a different defence mechanism and share the motivation behind the name of the podcast.  And James Bond seems to be queuing at the Hanger Lane gyratory system?Here are the highlights of this episode:(0.36) Motivation for the name of the show(3.38) Key points for there being no shortcut on the yellow brick road(6.31) Denial(7.18) IsolationConnect with Julia:WebsiteLinkedInInstagramABOUT THE PODCASTThe Dynamics of Everyday Life explores the psychological patterns shaping how we think, work and relate to others; bringing psychodynamic thinking into coaching, leadership and everyday life.If you're a coach interested in learning more about psychodynamic approaches to coaching, you can explore Julia's training programmes on her website.FOLLOW THE PODCASTIf you're enjoying The Dynamics of Everyday Life, follow the podcast on your listening app so you don't miss future episodes.

Do we know why we do things?  What can our reasons be?  We have been told over the last few years that we should have “purpose” or know what our “why” is.  Yet sometimes that’s not so easy to do.  And how do we feel if we are the ones struggling to find out our “why” in a world that seems to respond best to those of us who seem to know?Join me as I consider just what might be getting in the way of us finding out.  Have your defence mechanism bingo card at the ready!Here are the highlights of this episode:(1.25) Getting rid of the zeitgeist(3.46) Identification(5.19) Idealisation(6.30) Displacement and sublimationConnect with Julia:WebsiteLinkedInInstagramABOUT THE PODCASTThe Dynamics of Everyday Life explores the psychological patterns shaping how we think, work and relate to others; bringing psychodynamic thinking into coaching, leadership and everyday life.If you're a coach interested in learning more about psychodynamic approaches to coaching, you can explore Julia's training programmes on her website.FOLLOW THE PODCASTIf you're enjoying The Dynamics of Everyday Life, follow the podcast on your listening app so you don't miss future episodes.

In this episode I am exploring why we might be consciously – or unconsciously – avoiding looking in certain areas of our lives.  It won’t surprise you to learn that we will be delving back into the world of defence mechanisms.  What you might not be expecting is a nod to Melanie Klein, as well as our usual check in with Freud.My mother’s home decor gets a mention too!  Have a listen and see how this all comes together.Here are the highlights of this episode:(1.45) What might be going on for us?(2.28) Melanie Klein(4.59) Repetition complusion(6.50) Diane might be comfortable in her routineConnect with Julia:WebsiteLinkedInInstagramABOUT THE PODCASTThe Dynamics of Everyday Life explores the psychological patterns shaping how we think, work and relate to others; bringing psychodynamic thinking into coaching, leadership and everyday life.If you're a coach interested in learning more about psychodynamic approaches to coaching, you can explore Julia's training programmes on her website.FOLLOW THE PODCASTIf you're enjoying The Dynamics of Everyday Life, follow the podcast on your listening app so you don't miss future episodes.

Following on from a previous episode on sibling rivalry I’m delighted to introduce my next guest to the show, Natasha Rose.  As well as being an accomplished and celebrated businesswoman in a traditionally male industry (construction) Natasha is also a talented amateur actress.Natasha is starring in an upcoming version of the Jane Austen classic, Sense and Sensibility, which highlights the challenges we all face when putting other people’s needs before our own.  Austen’s Elinor and Marianne beautifully portray the family dynamics that can play out in these scenarios and the impact that these can have on how we feel.  Natasha and I discuss what might be going on here, particularly for her character, Elinor.  There’s also some defence mechanism spotting too.To catch Natasha and the rest of the cast in this fabulous performance you can find out more and buy tickets at https://tolethorpe.co.uk.Here are the highlights of this episode:(4.53) Say what you feel(7.15) “I require so much”(11.38) Defence mechanisms in overdrive(12.35) RationalisationConnect with Julia:WebsiteLinkedInInstagramABOUT THE PODCASTThe Dynamics of Everyday Life explores the psychological patterns shaping how we think, work and relate to others; bringing psychodynamic thinking into coaching, leadership and everyday life.If you're a coach interested in learning more about psychodynamic approaches to coaching, you can explore Julia's training programmes on her website.FOLLOW THE PODCASTIf you're enjoying The Dynamics of Everyday Life, follow the podcast on your listening app so you don't miss future episodes.

We all know that feeling of “I’ll do it tomorrow” whilst being fully aware that we won’t do it tomorrow, or even the next day.  Why do we do this to ourselves?  Are we just making our lives harder for no reason? In this episode as well as meeting our old friends rationalisation and denial we are also welcoming back the repetition compulsion.  And James Bond and Stan Wawrinka get a mention too!  What’s not to enjoy?Here are the highlights of this episode:(1.42) Procrastination makes us uncomfortable(3.06) Rationalisation(5.38) A false sense of tomorrow(6.38) Repetition compulsionConnect with Julia:WebsiteLinkedInInstagramABOUT THE PODCASTThe Dynamics of Everyday Life explores the psychological patterns shaping how we think, work and relate to others; bringing psychodynamic thinking into coaching, leadership and everyday life.If you're a coach interested in learning more about psychodynamic approaches to coaching, you can explore Julia's training programmes on her website.FOLLOW THE PODCASTIf you're enjoying The Dynamics of Everyday Life, follow the podcast on your listening app so you don't miss future episodes.

Sibling rivalry isn’t just something that we leave at home, only to be brought out again at family events and Christmas.  The way that we learn to be in the sibling dynamic can have a profound impact on how we relate to people as we grow and develop in life.  Sibling rivalry can exist for only children too.In this episode we are not just picking up our defence mechanism bingo cards again, we are having a think about Oedipus and the Murray brothers, whilst taking a trip to Cromer beach.  It’s a packed show!Here are the highlights of this episode:(1.14) What about Arabella?(2.25) Sibling rivalry in our everyday lives(3.18) The Oedipus Complex(6.08) Defence mechanism bingoConnect with Julia:WebsiteLinkedInInstagramABOUT THE PODCASTThe Dynamics of Everyday Life explores the psychological patterns shaping how we think, work and relate to others; bringing psychodynamic thinking into coaching, leadership and everyday life.If you're a coach interested in learning more about psychodynamic approaches to coaching, you can explore Julia's training programmes on her website.FOLLOW THE PODCASTIf you're enjoying The Dynamics of Everyday Life, follow the podcast on your listening app so you don't miss future episodes.

Power takes on many shapes and forms.  There is the power wielded over us by those who govern us and those who hold an authoritarian role in our lives, and there is our own personal power.  The power that is unique to us, and yet this is the one that we are often not in touch with or find it hard to hold on to.  In this episode we are picking up our defence mechanism bingo cards again and bringing Dick Dastardly and Matthew Hussey in to illustrate a couple of points.  What’s not to enjoy?Here are the highlights of this episode:(2.12) Projection(4.43) “What do you want?”(6.44) Projective Identification(8.22) Dick Dastardly and Matthew HusseyConnect with Julia:WebsiteLinkedInInstagramABOUT THE PODCASTThe Dynamics of Everyday Life explores the psychological patterns shaping how we think, work and relate to others; bringing psychodynamic thinking into coaching, leadership and everyday life.If you're a coach interested in learning more about psychodynamic approaches to coaching, you can explore Julia's training programmes on her website.FOLLOW THE PODCASTIf you're enjoying The Dynamics of Everyday Life, follow the podcast on your listening app so you don't miss future episodes.

There are many different reasons as to why we can’t leave a relationship, friendship or situation.  And so many times we beat ourselves up for not being strong enough.  Maybe we feel we lack confidence.  But what if it’s actually our minds trying to protect us?  What if it’s something that’s – ironically - trying to keep us safe?In this week’s episode I consider what might be going on for us when this is happening, and how we can give ourselves some grace.  And what song will be going round your head by the end of it?  The Communards “I never can say goodbye”? Or will it be a Kylie classic?Here are the highlights of this episode:(1.40) A Kylie classic(2.57) Anna Freud(3.09) Denial(4.46) Rationalisation(6.11) IntellectualisationConnect with Julia:WebsiteLinkedInInstagramABOUT THE PODCASTThe Dynamics of Everyday Life explores the psychological patterns shaping how we think, work and relate to others; bringing psychodynamic thinking into coaching, leadership and everyday life.If you're a coach interested in learning more about psychodynamic approaches to coaching, you can explore Julia's training programmes on her website.FOLLOW THE PODCASTIf you're enjoying The Dynamics of Everyday Life, follow the podcast on your listening app so you don't miss future episodes.

How often do we say something and then worry that we have said the wrong thing?  Often we will then run this over and over in our minds, thinking about if we have upset other people or what we could have said instead.  We can tie ourselves up in knots about a particular conversation or event, frequently catastrophising about what people now think about us or if we have damaged our friendship.In this episode I explore why this universal tendency occurs, how we can become more aware of it and what we can do to help ourselves in this situation.  We also have a moment on a plane with Charlton Heston too!Here are the highlights of this episode:(1.55) Anxiety neurosis(3.36) Conversion hysteria(5.16) Psychical working over(6.21) Repetition compulsion(6.51) Playing back responses from our earlier livesConnect with Julia:WebsiteLinkedInInstagramABOUT THE PODCASTThe Dynamics of Everyday Life explores the psychological patterns shaping how we think, work and relate to others; bringing psychodynamic thinking into coaching, leadership and everyday life.If you're a coach interested in learning more about psychodynamic approaches to coaching, you can explore Julia's training programmes on her website.FOLLOW THE PODCASTIf you're enjoying The Dynamics of Everyday Life, follow the podcast on your listening app so you don't miss future episodes.

I’m excited to welcome my next guest to the show today; Dr Jill McGarry.  Jill is a Clinical Psychologist with 28 years of NHS experience in psychological support for people with mental health issues.  She has built up a wealth of knowledge and experience at improving sleep for several client groups, including setting up a reasonable adjustment sleep apnoea clinic for Greater Manchester. Currently Jill runs a private practice for improving sleep whilst working part time in the psychology department at Manchester’s NHS Sleep Service. Over the past two years Jill has carried out numerous sleep awareness courses for wellbeing teams in NHS trusts and ICBs; schools/ college forums; fitness/ yoga/mindfulness coaches; counselling organisations; medical staff; care and respite home managers; leadership and management coaches; private organisations (property developer and bakery); organisations with nightshift workers.  Recently Jill has advised Baywater and NHS England on a project to develop materials for people with sleep apnoea and trained Clinical Psychologist and psychotherapists for Counselling Foundation, Take A Seat and in Dubai for PILL.  Throughout this work Jill has supported many people who have had sleep problems as they go from exhausted to energised. Jill and I are going to be talking about all things sleep related, and how this huge part of our lives can impact our health and our wellbeing – and how we feel about ourselves.   We also touch on what might be going on for us unconsciously in our sleep, in our dreams.  So sit back and enjoy, and hopefully look forward to some better nights’ sleep afterwards!You can get in touch with Jill at:[email protected]: Dr Jill McGarrymobile no: 07768068070Here are the highlights for this episode:(4.10) 1 Big B and 3 tiny Ts(21.21) Timing when you have coffee(29.36) Sleep debt(30.20) The importance of naps(36.34) Teenagers and sleep(42.48) DreamsConnect with Julia:WebsiteLinkedInInstagramABOUT THE PODCASTThe Dynamics of Everyday Life explores the psychological patterns shaping how we think, work and relate to others; bringing psychodynamic thinking into coaching, leadership and everyday life.If you're a coach interested in learning more about psychodynamic approaches to coaching, you can explore Julia's training programmes on her website.FOLLOW THE PODCASTIf you're enjoying The Dynamics of Everyday Life, follow the podcast on your listening app so you don't miss future episodes.

No is a small word, so we often think we need to add extra words after it, to make a complete sentence.  But this just isn’t true.  “No” is a sentence in itself.  We often tie ourselves up in knots trying to explain our no, which defeats the point, as the clarity becomes diluted.  In this episode I’m exploring why we often feel the need to justify our “no” and what we can do to stick to our decisions.  There’s also a bit of a Bond theme running through this episode too – can you spot all of the references?Here are the highlights for this episode:(0.45) People pleasing(1.29) Sean and Roger’s weekend plans(4.16) Rationalisation(6.20) Looking for chinks in the wall(8.30) Invitation for this weekConnect with Julia:WebsiteLinkedInInstagramABOUT THE PODCASTThe Dynamics of Everyday Life explores the psychological patterns shaping how we think, work and relate to others; bringing psychodynamic thinking into coaching, leadership and everyday life.If you're a coach interested in learning more about psychodynamic approaches to coaching, you can explore Julia's training programmes on her website.FOLLOW THE PODCASTIf you're enjoying The Dynamics of Everyday Life, follow the podcast on your listening app so you don't miss future episodes.