The Beautiful Nightmare

There are so many firsts we experience as kids but as adults as well. Starting school, hip hop class, a new gym, befriending new couple friends. The fear of the unknown or of rejection is forever lingering, and yet we go fourth anyway. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Strap in! What's your greatest fear? What's your absolute pet peeve? And if you could take over anyone's body for a week, who would it be? Tamara delves deep (maybe too deep) into her pockets to dish out some answers to these curly questions and more. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

From travelling abroad with a young family in tow, to awkward beach expeditions, the 6 week summer break has a lot of explaining to do. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Instead of being negative Nancy all over the holiday season, Shanelle and Tamara sublimate their energy into what they love about Christmas. They also offer a few tid bits of advice on the do's and don'ts of hosting.WARNING: We strongly advise parents to remove from the room any young believers of the big red man and his elf friends whilst listening to this episode. Beware of major spoiler alerts. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

This episode the gals discuss the scenarios in our lives when we really don't care. Whether our kids are eating Mars Bars for dinner or we exit our personality at school pick up because we have no fuel in the tank- it's important to revel in these zero f%#s moments. WARNING: Lots and lots of swear words (but mostly the 'F' word) Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Oh the hilarity that ensues when your 4 year old asks 'daddy, why are you peeing out of your finger?'. It's worse again when a grown ass adult Googles 'Does it take 18 months for twins to be born or 9?' The ladies churn through the best of the worst questions asked, all for a bit of fun. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

In a world that's quickly changing as fast as an Instagram story, it's hard to keep up with what we should and shouldn't be doing regarding social mores. From restaurant faux pas to dating etiquette, there's a plethora of opportunities to really stuff things if you're not quite sure how to act in any given situation. Let's face it, we've all been there, done that. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Single mum's are a force to be reckoned with. There isn't much of a choice, but doing it on your own can be hard yakka. At the same time, it offers advantages. Five mums speak openly about their experiences as single parents. The ups, the downs, the good and the bad. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

We feel pain whether physically or mentally, yet we spend a lot of time holding it all in. When you find yourself half naked lying on the bathroom floor after slipping on the soap, it's high time you had that big ugly cry and let people know how you really feel. Yep, we have feelings too. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

As adults, particularly parents, the journey alone can feel isolating if you don't have the right tribe. The gals offer some sound points on why navigating friendships can be tricky, and how your star sign might actually be the key to learning about your compatibility with new mates. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

It's 10 questions for this pocket rocket and boy does she give us the low down. What would you do with 10 millions dollars? What's your greatest fear? and how would you describe your best mate? Play along at home if you dare. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

All of us have moments of sheer awkwardness, whether it's saying weird things in front of your dermatologist, being unaware of that eye goop you had the whole time you were chatting to the hot neighbour, or simply having a brain glitch at the checkout and forgetting the word for 'zucchini', we've all experience social anxiety in some form or another. Shanelle and Tamara share their stories and laugh wholeheartedly at others as well. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Tamara shares her own story, and Shanelle and Tamara discuss aspects of dealing with grief after pregnancy loss. Motherhood- A Beautiful Nightmare would also like to thank those parents who have bravely contributed their stories on this episode.WARNING: This episode contains content relating to pregnancy loss and may be triggering for some people. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Where technology in our lives is super helpful, it's also the bane of our existence. Case in point: how often have you aggressively unplugged Google home because she just didn't understand your request? Have you accidentally texted the person you were actually gossiping about? And can you even remember your password for your Netflix account? We've all done it, all been there. But can technology really be in our friendship group? Or do we cast it off as the mean girl we're eager to take down? Shanelle and Tamara answer none of these questions, but in their classic style aim to keep you entertained on the subject nonetheless. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

The girls chat about the status of women in the Aussie rules football world, the impact it's currently having on the younger generation, as well as some of the obstacles still facing women in football. Erin and Shanelle take a little trip down memory lane and Tamara decides if she'll have a crack at becoming an AFLW player. Ronda & Raelene also stop by to give their two cents worth on the new Port Adelaide female captain. Good on ya love!! Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Kids love us so much we often find ourselves as their proverbial punching bag; whether it's in an emotional or physical sense, it cuts deep. Mum's share their tales of woe and the gals chat about why sticks and stones really do break their bones. Essentially, it's a brief history of kids who hurt their parents. Ouch. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

This episode explores some fabulous options for self-care and taking some time out just for you. Whether it's getting away with girlfriends for the weekend, lapping up the hairdressers head massage at the basin, or getting a much needed compliment that has you flying high for the rest of the day, it's all stuff we need to do and when we do - it’s oooh! Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Annie and Yvonne wax lyrical about their daughters; times there were near misses, a stroll down memory lane and moments they'd sometimes wished they'd forgotten. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Imagine this, you've floated into your bathroom, shut the door, disrobed from the waist down, and drawn breath for the first time in what seems like hours. All is well- that is until the dog, cat, husband, kids and family guinea pig slam down the door demanding you find their socks, jocks or Barbie doll this instant and it's all over red rover. Heading to the toilet can fill us with anxiety; whether it's a public toilet where your kids are licking the sink, or you're 'dropping the kids off at the pool' and you're ferociously interrupted. Yep, who said pooping was easy? Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

The gals get honest about what we really hate about being women. We know we can change the world one hair at a time, if we only stopped shaving them. But do we really want to? More often than not, we're all happy to jump on the bandwagon of feminism when it comes to gender equality due to impacts on our freedom of movement, wages and well being. There is however, little admission of those little things we find exhausting in order to remain younger, more attractive, pimple-less and hair free. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

From Disney to British TV, the Eighties and Nineties brought us some of the best children's television we'll never forget. It's the kind of nostalgia we love to look back on, and hope our kids do the same thing. Or do we? MABN give you some gob smacking examples of moments in kids television- Rugrats, The Jetsons, Pepper Pig- where sexual innuendo, racism and misogyny are too hard to ignore. It's the end of Season 5, but hang around and the ladies will be back with a roaring Season 6 very soon... Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

This episode the ladies weigh up the pros and cons on the age scale, beginning with what it means to have babies in your late teens, twenties, thirties, forties and beyond. We're all affected differently depending on circumstance and situation, and here we have a chance to hear from the MABN listeners about their experience on the psychological and emotional load, physical changes and societal pressures. Whether we like it or not, the biological clock doth tick. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Love them or hate them, kids parties provide us with stress on multiple levels. From the anxiety of parents staying for a dose of cream brie, Prosecco and awkward chats, to the sheer horror of present assembly with our without batteries, it's surprising we put ourselves through the party wringer each and every year. But at the end of the day the kids are happy, and isn't that what it's all about? ...and to gift or re-gift- that, is the question. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

This week MABN listeners share their period horror stories as the ladies discuss the joys of tampons and menstrual cups. Shanelle and Tamara may even give you a rendition of the ‘Rag Time Blues‘, surely it’s a song we should all be singing. Let’s start sharing and talking about our periods and we’ll be one step closer to removing the shame that we all unnecessarily carry. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

These three spill the tea on their parents, from the lies they told us as kids to catching them in the act, and of course their ageing idiosyncrasies-they cover it all. Strap in for this one, it’s a hoot! Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

It might be a day you love, dislike, find stressful; one that makes you teary, anxious or just damned right entitled. However you might perceive the day, it means something different to each one of us. MABN talk shitty gifts, shitty kids and receive a visit from the infamous pair Rhonda and Raylene. Bless! Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

So here’s the thing about being a mum, you’re constantly- 'MUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUM!!!!'- being interrupted. Whether it's your kids, partner or your phone, it's an uphill battle you'll never win (until the kids are at least, well, let's say, 21?)This episodes looks at all the moments we're trying to preserve without being hijacked. As women our DNA provides the court on which we find ourselves pivoting in order to keep on top of all the things in our lives. Now grab a wine, run that bath and put on those headphones- you might just get a good 5 minutes in... Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Family gatherings, Rhonda and Raylene, hyperactive kids, hire car antics and lesbian wannabes, Shanelle and Tamara are popping the cork on Season 5. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

In the last episode of season 4, Shanelle and Tamara sit down with Con and chat all things motherhood, how it changes us and what excites us now, whilst highlighting some of the things we all face together.It's raw, honest, hilarious and an episode where no Queen is left out- because we are more like our non-biological sisters than we may think! Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Just imagine- you're at your favourite eating spot, the sun's shining, you're with your family (bless 'em) and the world is good, until...yep, little Suzie has spilled the first drink of the evening, the twins have knocked over the menu board and the youngest is about to launch themselves off the table like a sugar induced superman. Ah, the serenity. We need to feed our children (there's your first hot tip), but when it comes to meal time we just can't win. Shanelle and Tamara wax lyrical about these moments with our families that are an inevitable hot mess. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Have you stabbed yourself in the eye with the mascara wand by accident on a number of occasions? Jumped into a drop squat like a baseball catcher to stretch either new or freshly washed jeans? Do you wear the same bra for longer than the suggested time because it looks clean and smells fine? And lastly, what about holding your boobs when you run down the stairs?Shanelle and Tamara discuss the above and plenty more in the hope you’ll jump on the band wagon and admit some of the things that you do too! Let’s face it, men probably have no idea about some of the idiosyncrasies women have. No matter where you are in the world, you'll find you are more like some of your fellow non-biological sisters than you may think! Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Have you lost your child in a public place? Found them walking around the house with sharp scissors waving hello at you? Or your innocent little one drinking the whole bottle of bubble blowing solution, whilst you took a shower. The list is never ending what these heart stoppers will get themselves into!Shanelle and Tamara share their own moments and those of other mums too, when things could have been an utter disaster, but the calm was restored, and our loveable rogues are all ok. It’s like walking the tight rope of life, whilst balancing your children on your head!! Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

The shoes, the socks, the breakfast, the hair, the eyes glued to the TV; each step is a war waged and not won, and not just with the kids. It’s your spouse too!This episode Shanelle and Tamara may not have the definitive answers to why all your family’s ears are filled with wax (save for yours), but they’ll certainly debunk ‘expert’ advice on the subject! Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Whether you’ve hidden chocolate from the kids as your own secret stash, undervalued that recent dress purchase or planned your wedding at work, if you’re going to lie at least COMMIT TO IT! This week the gals will make you feel like you're not alone in your pursuit to lie and get away with it!DISCLAIMER: There may be myths dispelled relating to Santa, the Tooth-fairy and The Easter Bunny. So kids, block your ears... Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Let’s face it, kids can be pretty weird and boy do we love them for it. This episode Mum’s write in to share their whacky stories about their kids; from eating tissues to plasticine genitalia, it's all in there and trust us, it's a cracker! Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Every year we wonder why we bother setting goals, making plans, breaking habits, when it inevitably turns to sh%$ after January 14th. With the global pandemic chomping at our heels it's especially hard; how do we plan for world domination when we don't even know if our kids will be going to school next week? Shanelle and Tamara discuss the 'Top 20 resolutions for Tired Mum's' thanks to our most helpful advice columnist- Google. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

It's the most wonderful time of year! (Or so they say). Between juggling family festivities, delegating food prep or avoiding the dodgy Uncle it's the kind of mayhem we secretly love. And why? Because of the children. If the Elf on the Shelf hasn't got you by the balls yet, then wait a few years and join the throng of parents that are hastily spinning their endless web of lies to create the perfect Christmas magic for their beloved families. Go mums, you've got this!Enjoy the last episode of MABN's latest season- whatever gets you through the holidays. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

So often our diligence to provide for our family, work and home life isn't rewarded how we'd like. Escaping our reality for 8 minutes when you’ve got no s##ts left to give, is not only grossly underrated but a damn requirement! This episode discusses those moments in which we find ourselves, but are quickly reminded by those around us i.e. kids, family, (rearview mirrors) of the hamster wheel on which we're spinning. Shanelle waxes lyrical about the struggles of having a bath, and Tamara brags about that one time she upstaged Michael Buble.WARNING: we over share about periods a little bit... Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Shan and Tam, interview spiritual energy healer Maria Clarke about how to work out if you’re little one has the sixth sense, and the best way to nurture and help them understand it. A common belief the world over is that children are naturally more connected to the spirit realm. We need to discuss things that are essential to keeping these children happy and healthy, and how to avoid pitfalls that could spoil their special gifts.A child's world is filled with extraordinary things and Psychic gifts are present at an incredibly tender age. Does any of the following sound like your little one? Having an overwhelming fear of the dark, sensitive, night terrors and vivid dreams, being affected by emotional energies around them, reports of imaginary friends or maybe even a brief conversation with a loved one who is no longer here?Discussed is also how we can soul search to find our purpose outside of motherhood; “who am I and what do I want to do with my life?” Travel the spiritual super highway and find out! Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

It’s always great fun when kids speak their truth loudly out it public for the masses to hear. How they piece it all together in their little minds and then blurt it out, often leaves us with raised eyebrows and great content for that next coffee catch up. Shanelle and Tamara interview a bunch of pint sized cuties (including their own!) to find out exactly what they are thinking! Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

In parenthood there is certainly no ‘one size fits all’ however, some things are so left of centre that they cause an adverse reaction and our immediate response is - ‘There is no way I’d do that!!'. On the flip side, when we share some idiosyncrasies with others (like swaying an invisible baby in the supermarket line when you hear another child cry), it's funny to admit, we're all weirdos in our own unique and wonderful ways. Shan and Tam take a deep dive into some of the whacky things our mothers were told when they were pregnant and also how parenting differs in other countries. No judgements here, but it’s always fun to show some comparisons and maybe even some relate-ability! Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

These are just some of the ‘running’ jokes that women have heard in abundance over the years. We laugh together and then awkwardly smirk because it's something that can cause serious embarrassment. No wonder these areas need help getting back into shape because pregnancy and childbirth are no doubt the most strenuous task our bodies will ever go through.Shan and Tam chat to Women’s Health Physio and Pelvic Floor expert Kath Baquie from ‘Fitnest Mama’ in Melbourne about all things pelvic floor, including at home stress tests and tips for the guys too….Yep it’s not just the ladies that struggle in this department! Kath brings a wealth of knowledge to a subject that is often shamefully ignored because it's out of site and out of mind. Shan and Tam doing their best to help change the world one pelvic floor at a time. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

'Are we there yet? Are we there yet?' said every kid 5 minutes into the holiday journey. From bad blow up mattresses, packing the car, travel snack tips, disciplining your kids in front of your friends, and weird time outs in weird corners, this episode covers it all. You'll hear why Tamara's hating on cheese platters, Ollie has a penchant for cat food, and how to get free stuff at a hotel. Keep an ear out for Shanelle's hot tip on how to look busy for the post holiday clean up without actually lifting a finger (she's really good at it), whilst Tamara gets to be a lesbian for an hour. It's jam packed with good holiday fun! Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Nowadays, whether it's inflating your breasts, filling those stress lines or adding some puff to your smackeroos, cosmetic enhancement is as accessible as grabbing a burger at your local drive through. But if you haven't gone down that road yet, perhaps you've considered the options. Shanelle and Tamara discuss the 'do you or don't you' of tweaking yourself, from learning to love the bodies we have, to the social judgement's we face if we choose the path of self improvement. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Have you ever have those moments where your brain fog is so bad? You were positive you didn't have those socks on before you got in the shower? Or perhaps you've driven 6 blocks only to realise your 5 year old is sitting next to you in the passenger seat. Eeep…Yep!!This episode we hear from you - our sublime MABN listeners who have shared their Mumnesia mis-haps with us. A hilarious montage of moments from mothers who've experienced/are still in the throws of, pregnancy or post-baby mum brain. Trust us on this one - we're still laughing. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

We solemnly swear we'll never be that parent, but if you aren't already, it's coming baby. Perhaps it's something in our DNA, a genetic throwback from our caveman ancestors that instills a scary kinda competitiveness that sees us hurling meat pies at the floor and obscenities at poor Timmy who didn't quite make that goal. Whether you're a passionate parent of a budding dancer or a future Olympic discus thrower, supporting our children to win win win is clearly in our blood. But should we apologise for it? Discuss. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Lockdowns have given us a lot of things; a chance to be with the loved ones we previously never had time for, the beauty of reflection in a world ravaged by a seemingly never ending pandemic, and a chance to tackle those stubborn in-grown hairs we've been eyeing off for the last 6 months. But home schooling our kids is definitely one of those beasts we can add to the bad list along with masks, loss of individual liberties and Zoom meetings. This episode we celebrate all teachers far and wide for doing a job we clearly have no training for. From pre-school to high school and everything in between, we endeavour to guide our children through their yearly curriculum with or without our heads screwed on. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

We know our partners, but do we really know what they are thinking?!!? This is a chance to jump inside their heads and get the low down on Dad guilt..is it a thing? What about self-care? How many times a week is a good amount of sex, and what do they imagine child birth is really like? Do they just have that caveman mentality with a side of Netflix and golf! It's time to open that dad book once and for all. All cards are on the table... Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Just for fun this episode Shanelle and Tamara uncover the sometimes shocking, sometimes debauched history behind the rhymes you've grown up on and have now passed on to your children. Each has a lesson to be learned or a warning to be heeded; who really was Mother Hubbard? What's with Peter and his pumpkins? And why are silverbells and cockleshells something to be feared? Motherhood a Beautiful Nightmare shed light on them all. Watch out, it's a shocker! Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

In this episode we chat about the limits our bodies afford us after having kids and how this impacts sexy times for you and your partner. We're talking feeling sexy when you're breast feeding, applauding your wobbly bits, and how the hell you get your vagina back into gear when all it wants to do is shut up shop. Let's get freaky ladies! Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.