Thanks For Asking

The world doesn’t make a lot of sense right now, including other people and why they think the things they think and do the things they do. So I’m tapping in Steven J. Heine, professor of Social and Cultural Psychology and the author of Start Making Sense: How Existential Psychology Can Help Us Build Meaningful Lives in Absurd Times to talk about: -How these times are actually kind of precedented by the Age of Anxiety -How we make meaning -How our stories drive our choices, and our choices make our stories -A million other things. You can buy Steven’s book here to support her, independent bookstores, and this podcast. You can support this show and get ad-free episodes of our entire back catalog (and more!) on my substack. Have something you want to talk about? You can call or text us any time at 612.568.4441 or email [email protected] Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Last week’s pep talk episode (https://noraborealis.substack.com/p/stop-being-mean-to-yourself) was such a hit we’re back with more (and I’m making some phone calls today because WOW WE ARE ALL GOING THROUGH IT RIGHT NOW!!!) Today we have two callers: a 32-year-old who feels lost after losing both of her parents and receiving a tough diagnosis, and a 23-year-old who is a little too wise beyond her years because of a traumatic childhood. If you, too, are Going Through It, I promise you that your best is good enough and the problems you’re experiencing are not a personal failing but a symptom of a world that really just doesn’t do a great job of taking care of each other. And, as a deeply biased podcast host, I am on your side. ☎️ 612.568.4441 You can call or text that number, tell me what you need a little pep talk for, and then stay glued to your phone for when I call you, okay? Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Sharing an episode of “What It’s Like to Be…” from author Dan Heath. On the podcast, Dan explores the world of work, one profession at a time, and interviews people who love what they do. He finds out: What does a couples therapist think when a friend asks for relationship advice? Is a Secret Service Agent supposed to pretend like they’re not there when they’re around the president? What are the 3 clocks that govern the life of a long-haul truck driver? If you’ve ever met someone whose work you were curious about, and you had 100 nosy questions but were too polite to ask… this is the show for you. In this preview, Dr. Alfredo Quiñones-Hinojosa (“Dr. Q”), a brain surgeon at the Mayo Clinic, describes his work: zapping parts of the brain to know where to cut, operating a mouth-controlled microscope, and carrying the weight of life-or-death decisions. How do you preserve a mathematician's expertise when removing tumors? And how did Dr. Q go from picking tomatoes to performing brain surgery? You can listen to more episodes of What It’s Like to Be here! Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Estrangement is one of those hot button topic that everyone has an opinion about, and here’s mine: you have one job as a parent1, and that’s to love your children. To show up for them. To support them. To not ditch out on their wedding LIKE A TOTAL WEIRDO. Are things more complicated than that? Sure, people are complicated. But on this show I let you call in and talk about your life and your feelings and, most importantly: I will never claim to be an unbiased host, because I am deeply biased person and if we are on the phone, chances are that I am on your side! Big thanks to Chelsey for being brave enough to move through this world without the people who brought her into it, and to share her story with all of us. - For full episodes, the full back catalog and a listener community, you can join us ⁠here⁠. Want to be on the show? Call or text 612.568.4441 or book a call ⁠here⁠. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Every once in a while, we all need a little bit of solicited motivation from someone totally unqualified to give it. In this episode, Nora shells out loads of love and support in the first of our series of TFA Pep Talks. For full episodes, the full back catalog and a listener community, you can join us here. Want to be on the show? Call or text 612.568.4441 or book a call here. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

What if your doctor prescribed you a hiking group? A ceramics class? Not in place of whatever medication or treatment you may need, but as a complement to it? It’s called Social Prescribing, and journalist Julia Hotz traveled to some 30 countries to talk to patients and professionals who are at the forefront of this approach to wellness. I loved her book, and loved this conversation (and regret we didn’t have time to talk about AI chatbots!). You can buy Julia’s book here to support her, independent bookstores, and this podcast. This is a preview of Thanks for Asking, a call-in show about what matters to you. You can get the full episode on my Substack. Have something you want to talk about? You can call or text us any time at 612.568.4441 or email [email protected] Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

In this episode, we discuss the defining moments in our lives that forever branded us with shame. For full episodes, the full back catalog and a listener community, you can join us here. Want to be on the show? Call or text 612.568.4441 or book a call here. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Of all the stages of grief, anger has to be the ugliest one. The one that feels the ickiest no matter what side of it you’re on. So today we’re talking about it. For full episodes, the full back catalog and a listener community, you can join us here. Want to be on the show? Call or text 612.568.4441 or book a call here. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Sharing a new show from my friends at Higher Ground, hosted by Michelle Obama, called IMO. You know on Thanks for Asking, we keep it real and help each other through some of our hardest times. Similarly on IMO, Michelle and her big brother Craig Robinson tackle real questions from real folks just like you, offering practical advice, personal storytelling, and plenty of laughs. Each week, they’re joined by a guest to bring candid perspectives to the everyday questions shaping our lives, relationships and the world around us. Topics range from dating and relationships, to family and faith. Michelle and Craig share stories about being there for each other throughout their lives, from first crushes and fraught college years, to landing at the White House, to losing their mom. For six decades they’ve been each others’ most trusted counsel—and now, they want to be that counsel for you. In this episode, they’re joined by actress Issa Rae for a conversation about navigating the challenges of mismatched expectations in female friendships. You can find more episodes of IMO at https://lnk.to/imomichellecraigTT Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

In this episode, we get an update from widower David Cherson. This is the first part of a two-part series called Life of a Lonely Widower. For Life of a Lonely Widower (Part 2) and other full episodes, the full back catalog and a listener community, you can join us here. Want to be on the show? Call or text 612.568.4441 or book a call here. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Take a break from the doom and disaster and reset your psyche with some okay things. We won’t ever say “everything is going to be okay” but we will do our best to find and focus on even the littlest okay things around us that aren’t the very worst. Keep the bar low and your head up. For full episodes, the full back catalog and a listener community, you can join us here. Want to be on the show? Call or text 612.568.4441 or book a call here. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

I cannot trust anyone who says No Regrets. Because really…you don’t have ANY? NONE?! Are you sure about that? I can tend towards the opposite mentality myself, but in between No Regrets and All Regrets is a safe middle ground of self-reflection and accountability without self-flagellation and rumination, and that is where we met today’s callers, who bravely dialed in to share their regrets - big and small. For full episodes, the full back catalog and a listener community, you can join us here. Want to be on the show? Call or text 612.568.4441 or book a call here. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Rise and Grind, Girlbosses! It’s time to GROWTH HACK your way to your BEST SELF and make this the ULTIMATE year. If you don’t have time, you can make time, because excuses are no excuse. Just kidding! Like so many of us, author Maria Bowler found herself caught up in the Productivity Machine, which demands we do more and more and more for the sake of…what, exactly? For the sake of more, of course! Maria’s new book, Making Time: A New Vision for Crafting A Life Beyond Productivity is not a book of tips and tricks and life hacks, but a gentler and more generous approach to how we spend our one precious life. It’s a perfect read for anyone who feels burned out and not “enough” – you can get your copy here and support Maria, small bookstores and this show. This show is made possible by listeners like you: to get our full back catalog, ad-free episodes and more, consider becoming a paid subscriber. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Do you say something? Do you shut up? I’m just one woman with an opinion, so I took your calls and texts to answer this listener question: do you say something when your friend is in a relationship with someone you hate? This is a preview of Thanks for Asking, a call-in show about what matters to you. You can get the full episode on my Substack. Have something you want to talk about? You can call or text us any time at 612.568.4441 or email [email protected] Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

If it’s Tuesday, the phone lines are open and operators (me) are standing by. Today we’re talk to callers from Honolulu to North Carolina about everything from worrying to working as an extra on Hallmark movies to existential crises. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

As a widow, I get many emails from other widows. But this one – from a man who created an AI version of his dead wife – was definitely a first. And I knew I had to talk to him. For full episodes, the full back catalog and a listener community, you can join us here. Want to be on the show? Call or text 612.568.4441 or book a call here. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Sharing a podcast we can’t get enough of: Your Mama’s Kitchen. It’s a show about cuisine and culture, ingredients and identities, and the meals and memories that make us who we are. Host Michele Norris talks to Michelle Obama, Glennon Doyle, José Andrés and so many other guests about the complexities of family life and how their earliest culinary experiences helped shape their personal and professional lives. And of course, each guest shares a recipe for a favorite dish from their youth so you can taste a bit of their story. In this episode, singer John Legend takes us back to his roots in Springfield, Ohio, where he was an academic overachiever and a musical prodigy. John opens up about his early rocky relationship with his mother and how, over time, they came together to nurture one beautiful family. Plus, we learn how to make his mama's special mac & cheese. You can find more Your Mama’s Kitchen at https://lnk.to/yourmamaskitchenTF Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Loneliness is, according to people who know about these things, an epidemic on par with smoking and obesity. It affects our physical and mental health…and it seems like it’s affecting everyone. Today’s callers are experiencing loneliness in many different ways and for many different reasons, and if you are also feeling lonely…you’re definitely not alone. Take a listen, then call someone (anyone!). Make a plan to hang out, and follow through. Let’s find and nurture connections wherever and however we can. For full episodes, the full back catalog and a listener community, you can join us here. Check out Nora on YouTube. Want to be on the show? Call or text 612.568.4441 or book a call here. Articles mentioned in this show: Americans need to party more The antidote to loneliess The loneliness epidemic Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

THINGS ARE DEFINITELY NOT OK RIGHT NOW! We know it. You know it. Your dog knows it (who told her??). But even when things are terrible, there’s something out there — however small — that is at least okay. Today’s episode is an exercise in finding (and sharing) the ok, with stories of the ways strangers have shown up for us in our times of need. Thanks to everyone who called (or texted!) in. Call or text us at 612.568.4441 any time. If you’d like to support the show (and get more of it) join us here. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

The first episode of our new call-in show is here, and we have two callers who seemed to be totally unrelated: a new rancher in Texas, and a Swiftie with Cerebral Palsy in New York. But (get your red string and your tinfoil hat) everything is connected! Especially us. That’s easy to forget when we’re constantly pushed to see each other as the enemy, and something we need to remember now more than ever. For full episodes, the full back catalog and a listener community, you can join us here. Want to be on the show? Call or text 612.568.4441 or email [email protected] Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

It’s been awhile since we’ve been in your feed, probably because we took a hiatus in March of 2024. Nearly a year later, we have some clarity on what’s next (it’s exciting!). The new show will launch on January 14, but on Sunday I shared that 2025 is The Year of Less and at least 5 people said they were interested in hearing more about what that means and I couldn’t wait ANOTHER week because I simply don’t have the brain storage space. In this episode, we cover: What practices led me to this new iteration of the podcast How my family closes out an old year and makes room for a new one my vision board process (don’t cringe!), which I learned from the wonderful Elizabeth Kott. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

In case you didn't know, we're still making episodes that are available exclusively on Nora's Substack! We wanted to give all of our listeners a little preview of our most recent episode! Consider joining Nora's Substack to listen to the rest of the episode, get additional bonus episodes, and ad-free episodes! _ Most people I know are feeling overwhelmed, to put it lightly. Between the stuff you have to do (work, paying your bills, getting your kid new shoes, or vacuuming up the dog hair before you host book club) and the things you wantto do and know will make you feel better (going to the gym, drinking water, REST, spending time with friends, starting one of the million hobbies you bought supplies for and shoved into a closet), it’s all too much and somehow we still don’t feel like we’re doing enough. We’re supposed to do it all (and make it look easy), but it feels like an equation that always adds up to “well, if you can’t figure out how to do it all you must be a loser!” Today’s guest is Kendra Adachi, AKA The Lazy Genius. Kendra is the author of The Plan: Managing Your Time Like A Lazy Genius, a book that is nearly the exact opposite of any time management book I’ve ever read, and a message I desperately needed to hear. - Please send us your questions and comments about this episode or any other! You can email us at [email protected] or leave us a voicemail at 612-568-4441. — Check out Nora on YouTube. Find all our shows and more at feelingsand.co. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

In case you didn't know, we're still making episodes that are available exclusively on Nora's Substack! We wanted to give all of our listeners a little preview of our most recent episode! Consider joining Nora's Substack to listen to the rest of the episode, get additional bonus episodes, and ad-free episodes! _ Charles Bock was not interested in parenthood. He moved to New York to be a writer, not to change diapers. But when he met his wife Diana, all she wanted was to be a mom. So he said yes, thinking he would be part of a parenting team. But in the first six months of his daughter’s life, Diana was diagnosed with advanced leukemia and died. Charles became a single dad to a little baby, while also grieving the person he loved. In this episode, Nora interviews Charles about this experience and writing about it in his memoir, I Will Do Better. - Please send us your questions and comments about this episode or any other! You can email us at [email protected] or leave us a voicemail at 612-568-4441. — Check out Nora on YouTube. Find all our shows and more at feelingsand.co. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

In case you didn't know, we're still making episodes that are available exclusively on Nora's Substack! We wanted to give all of our listeners a little preview of our most recent episode! Consider joining Nora's Substack to listen to the rest of the episode, get additional bonus episodes, and ad-free episodes! _ In June 2021, Isaiah Goodman, a financial adviser, was sentenced to 7 years in prison for defrauding clients out of $2.3 million dollars. One of the clients he stole from was Celisia Stanton, and in 2021 we interviewed Celisia about being a victim of that crime. Nora recently caught up with Celisia about how she’s processing this experience a few years later and how she took this experience and created a podcast called Truer Crime, which centers the victims of crimes in the storytelling. - Listen to our first episode with Celisia, Behind The Scammer. Check out Celisia’s podcast, Truer Crime. _ Please send us your questions and comments about this episode or any other! You can email us at [email protected] or leave us a voicemail at 612-568-4441. — Check us out on YouTube. Find all our shows and more at feelingsand.co Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

In case you didn't know, we're still making episodes that are available exclusively on Nora's Substack! We wanted to give all of our listeners a little preview of our most recent episode! Consider joining Nora's Substack to listen to the rest of the episode, get additional bonus episodes, and ad-free episodes! _ In 2022, Prolonged Grief Disorder was added to the DSM-V. A new mental health disorder tied to grief ruffled a lot of feathers, including Nora’s. She talked about it on TTFA (including skepticism around this diagnosis) and you all shared your thoughts on this news as well. This episode is a very cool follow up because we get to learn more about this disorder from one of the doctors who created the diagnosis. Nora interviews Dr. Katherine Shear from Columbia University’s Center for Prolonged Grief about the difference between grief and prolonged grief, the treatment plan she and her team developed, and how American culture is still *so* bad at grieving. Listen to the previous episodes: How Long Should Grief Last? How Long Should Grief Last? Part 2 _ Please send us your questions and comments about this episode or any other! You can email us at [email protected] or leave us a voicemail at 612-568-4441. — Check us out on YouTube. Find all our shows and more at feelingsand.co Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Subscribe to TTFA Anthologies here. Two days after Nora’s husband Aaron died, she celebrated Thanksgiving with her family. Well... maybe not “celebrated.” Every year, millions of people do the same thing during the holidays. In this episode, we talk with some of those folks, including Dr. Lucy Kalanithi and comedian Amber Tozer. We also spend some time with some of the women of the Hot Young Widows Club, talking about their hopes and dreams for the upcoming year. Plus, stories of some of the worst holidays ever. _ Come see the Happyish Holidays Live Show: A Petty LIttle Christmas at The Parkway Theatre in Minneapolis on December 4th and 5th, or join the livestream on December 5th! _ It’s the most wonderful time of the year… um, but is it really? The holiday season can be complicated. Sometimes instead of cozy nights with hot cocoa and meaningful moments, we get tears, ruined plans, and nights spent hiding in the bathroom at family parties. If the holiday season hasn’t always lived up to your expectations, join us for Happyish Holidays, a collection of holidays gone wrong presented by Terrible, Thanks for Asking. Happyish Holidays to you and yours! Terrible, Thanks for Asking tells the real stories of real people who have lived through the terrible things in life. TTFA Anthologies are a curated collection of some of our best stories; released in seasons that focus on a specific topic. You can find our entire episode catalog ad-free on Apple+ or Patreon. Created and hosted by Nora McInerny. - Find Nora’s weekly newsletter here! Also, check out Nora on YouTube. _ The Feelings & Co. team is Nora McInerny, Claire McInerny, Marcel Malekebu and Grace Barry. _ Find all our shows at www.feelingsand.co. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Subscribe to TTFA Anthologies here. If the holidays make you want to tear your hair out or cry on the bathroom floor, YOU ARE NOT ALONE. It's a hard time for a lot of people, and still we have to force a smile and say through gritted teeth, "Happy Holidays!" But the holidays aren't always happy. Most of the time, all we can ask for is HappyISH Holidays. In this episode, Nora McInerny and producer Marcel Malekebu dive into AITA stories of holidays gone wrong. You can play judge, jury, and executioner with them. If you need a holiday survival guide, we're sorry, this isn't it. But it just might make you feel better about your holiday blunders! _ Come see the Happyish Holidays Live Show: A Petty LIttle Christmas at The Parkway Theatre in Minneapolis on December 4th and 5th, or join the livestream on December 5th! _ It’s the most wonderful time of the year… um, but is it really? The holiday season can be complicated. Sometimes instead of cozy nights with hot cocoa and meaningful moments, we get tears, ruined plans, and nights spent hiding in the bathroom at family parties. If the holiday season hasn’t always lived up to your expectations, join us for Happyish Holidays, a collection of holidays gone wrong presented by Terrible, Thanks for Asking. Happyish Holidays to you and yours! Terrible, Thanks for Asking tells the real stories of real people who have lived through the terrible things in life. TTFA Anthologies are a curated collection of some of our best stories; released in seasons that focus on a specific topic. You can find our entire episode catalog ad-free on Apple+ or Patreon. Created and hosted by Nora McInerny. - Find Nora’s weekly newsletter here! Also, check out Nora on YouTube. _ The Feelings & Co. team is Nora McInerny, Claire McInerny, Marcel Malekebu and Grace Barry. _ Find all our shows at www.feelingsand.co. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

In case you didn't know, we're still making two episodes a month for our Patreon and Apple Plus subscribers. We wanted to give all of our listeners a little preview of our most recent episode! Consider joining our Patreon to listen to the rest of the episode(or watch the episode!), get additional bonus episodes, ad-free episodes, and join a community of Terribles. (Or, if you’re an Apple Podcast listener, you can sign up for TTFA Premium right in the app!) _ Refamulating, one of our other shows at Feelings and Co, is back today with its second season! To celebrate, we wanted to share one of their episodes from season 1. It’s called “Seahorse Dad” and features former TTFA guest Liam Magan (from Liam and the Letters). When Nora interviewed Liam a few years ago, he shared his experience of coming out as trans and the conflict that caused with his evangelical family. Liam is in a very different place in his life these days, and in this episode of Refamulating he talks about his journey of trying to get pregnant as a trans man. Listen to the new season of Refamulating now! _ Please send us your questions and comments about this episode or any other! You can email us at [email protected] or leave us a voicemail at 612-568-4441. — Check us out on YouTube. Find all our shows and more at feelingsand.co Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Today is Election Day in the U.S. and for many of us that means…getting through the day is going to feel like watching water boil. So we have an idea: delete the news apps off your phone today, don’t check social media, and press play on this multi-hour, politics free chat between Nora and Kate Kennedy. When you finish this episode, don’t worry, THERE’S MORE. Head over to Kate Kennedy’s Patreon to get more of this conversation. And if you need MORE distractions, we got you: Listen to our It’s Going To Be Okay playlist to combat anxiety Watch our YouTube videos! _ In case you didn't know, we're still making episodes that are available exclusively on Nora's Substack! We wanted to give all of our listeners a little preview of our most recent episode! Consider joining Nora's Substack to listen to the rest of the episode, get additional bonus episodes, and ad-free episodes! _ Please send us your questions and comments about this episode or any other! You can email us at [email protected] or leave us a voicemail at 612-568-4441. — Check us out on YouTube. Find all our shows and more at feelingsand.co Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

In case you didn't know, we're still making episodes that are available exclusively on Nora's Substack! We wanted to give all of our listeners a little preview of our most recent episode! Consider joining Nora's Substack to listen to the rest of the episode, get additional bonus episodes, and ad-free episodes! _ Three years ago we published a TTFA episode called ‘Don’t You Want Somebody To Take Care Of You?’, an interview with Gina Demillo Wagner about her experience growing up in a dysfunctional family and being a caregiver as a child. Gina’s brother Alan had a rare genetic disorder that caused him to veer from loving to violent. His illness put stress on the entire family, including her parents, whose mental illnesses went untreated. Since that episode, Gina’s written a book about this experience called Forces of Nature: A Memoir of Family, Loss and Finding Home. On this episode, Gina and Nora catch up about writing the book, how writing helped her process and how some of the Real Housewives helped give her the courage to cut off contact with some family members. _ Please send us your questions and comments about this episode or any other! You can email us at [email protected] or leave us a voicemail at 612-568-4441. — Check us out on YouTube. Find all our shows and more at feelingsand.co Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

In case you didn't know, we're still making episodes that are available exclusively on Nora's Substack! We wanted to give all of our listeners a little preview of our most recent episode! Consider joining Nora's Substack to listen to the rest of the episode, get additional bonus episodes, and ad-free episodes! _ Have you thought at some point in your adult life, I wish I had more friends? Maybe you moved to a new city, saw your social life dwindle after having kids, or spent all your time and energy on your romantic relationships. No matter how you got there, trying to make friends as an adult is a really hard task! To try and help us all be better friends, we called in an expert: Marisa Franco is a professor and studies and writes about friendship and human connection. She is the author of Platonic: How the science of attachment can help you make- and keep- friends. Marisa and Nora discuss how important friendships are to our mental health and how we can all strengthen our friendships. Please send us your questions and comments about this episode or any other! You can email us at [email protected] or leave us a voicemail at 612-568-4441. — Check us out on YouTube. Find all our shows and more at feelingsand.co Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

In case you didn't know, we're still making episodes that are available exclusively on Nora's Substack! We wanted to give all of our listeners a little preview of our most recent episode! Consider joining Nora's Substack to listen to the rest of the episode, get additional bonus episodes, and ad-free episodes! _ Earlier this year we did a bonus episode showcasing obituaries from your dead loved ones. Nora cried throughout the entire episode, so we wanted to do it again! There were so many obituaries we couldn’t read the first time, so we’re honored to share more of your beautiful loved ones and we wanted to give all of our listeners a little preview of that bonus episode! It’s truly an honor to learn about all of the people you loved, so thank you for sharing them with us. _ Here’s the full article from Shiri, who wrote about the abortion she had to save her son’s life. _ Also, check out Nora on YouTube. _ Please send us your questions and comments about this episode or any other! You can email us at [email protected] or leave us a voicemail at 612-568-4441. — Find all our shows and more at feelingsand.co Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Subscribe to TTFA Anthologies here. This is an episode about two letters. One of those is the letter Jim left for his wife, Annie, before he died by suicide. The second is the letter Annie wrote to Jim after his death — and as she dealt with her own mental health issues and suicidality in the wake of it. When someone dies by suicide, people want it to be someone’s fault, so they can (hopefully) feel less like it’s their fault. But the thing is … it’s never anyone’s fault. _ Terrible, Thanks for Asking tells the real stories of real people who have lived through the terrible things in life. TTFA Anthologies are a curated collection of some of our best stories; released in seasons that focus on a specific topic. You can find our entire episode catalog ad-free on Apple+ or Patreon. – Find Nora’s weekly newsletter here! Also, check out Nora on YouTube. _ The Feelings & Co. team is Nora McInerny, Claire McInerny, Marcel Malekebu and Grace Barry. _ Find all our shows and our store at www.feelingsand.co. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Subscribe to TTFA Anthologies here. Terrible, Thanks for Asking tells the real stories of real people who have lived through the terrible things in life. TTFA Anthologies are a curated collection of some of our best stories; released in seasons that focus on a specific topic. You can find our entire episode catalog ad-free on Apple+ or Patreon. – Find Nora’s weekly newsletter here! Also, check out Nora on YouTube. _ The Feelings & Co. team is Nora McInerny, Claire McInerny, Marcel Malekebu and Grace Barry. _ Find all our shows and our store at www.feelingsand.co. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

In case you didn't know, we're still making episodes that are available exclusively on Nora's Substack! - Years ago, when Nora was in the worst phase of her life (dead husband, dead dad, lost pregnancy) she heard a lot of people describe her as resilient. Those people meant it as a compliment, but to Nora it didn’t feel that way. She was tired, grieving, and lost so much in her life- the “resilience” people saw was often just…the privilege she had to survive it. So when Nora got the new book, The Resilience Myth by Soraya Chemaly, she devoured it. In this episode, Nora and Soraya talk about different ways to think about resiliency and how celebrating it can be a little toxic. _ Check out Nora on YouTube! __ Find all our shows and more at feelingsand.co. — Find TTFA on social: TTFA on Instagram | TTFA on Facebook Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

When Nora was about to marry her first husband Aaron, they were in the thick of his cancer treatment. So the day before the wedding, she got a small tattoo to remind her to stay in the present moment. This was an excerpt from Nora’s first book, It’s Okay To Laugh (Crying is cool, too) which is available here. _ If you have anxiety, depression or any sense of the world around you, you know that not *everything* is going to be okay. In fact, many things aren’t okay and never will be! But instead of falling into the pit of despair, we’re bringing you a little OK for your day. Every weekday, we’ll bring you one okay thing to help you start, end or endure your day with the opposite of a doom scroll. Created and hosted by Nora McInerny. Find Nora’s weekly newsletter here. We’re on YouTube, with new videos twice a week! Subscribe here. _ “It’s Going To Be OK” is brought to you by The Hartford. The Hartford is a leading insurance provider that connects people and technology for better employee benefits. Learn more at www.thehartford.com/benefits. _ Share your OK thing at 612.568.4441 or by emailing a note or voice memo to [email protected]. Start your message with “I’m (name) and it’s going to be okay.” _ The IGTBO team is Nora McInerny, Claire McInerny, Marcel Malekebu, Amanda Romani and Grace Barry. _ The transcript for this episode can be found here. Find all our shows and our store at www.feelingsand.co. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Two years ago Julia Winston was asked to help a gay couple start a family by donating her eggs. At the time, she was 38, single, and had no idea if she’d start her own family. Sometimes that made her feel insecure, so the opportunity to donate her eggs allowed her to help create a family, just not the one she imagined in her head. Since the donation, she’s gone through an emotional transformation that opened her eyes to all the different ways a family can look. Julia is the host of Refamulating, the newest podcast from the Feelings and Co universe. Listen to Refamulating now, wherever you get your podcasts. Follow the show on Instagram. _ This is our last episode of Terrible Thanks for Asking for a while. If you want to get new episodes of TTFA through August, consider joining our Patreon. (Or, if you’re an Apple Podcast listener, you can sign up for TTFA Premium right in the app!) Our Substack is a great way to connect with us and other listeners (and get more Terrible in your inbox). Join us here. The episode transcript can be found here. — We’re lucky to only work with sponsors and brands we know and love. Using our links and codes saves you money and supports our independent production! Foria: Experience your juiciest and deepest sensual experience with a bottle of Foria. FORIA is offering a special deal for our listeners. Get 20% off your first order by visiting foriawellness.com/TERRIBLE OR use code TERRIBLE at checkout. I recommend trying their new Massage Oil combined with their Awaken Arousal Oil. You’ll thank me later. BetterHelp: Learn to make time for what makes you happy, with BetterHelp. Visit BetterHelp.com/TTFA today to get 10% off your first month. You can find our full sponsor list here. — Find all our shows and our store at feelingsand.co. — Find TTFA on social: TTFA on Instagram | TTFA on Facebook See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

In case you didn't know, we're still making episodes that are available exclusively on Nora's Substack! - As we prepare for our indefinite hiatus, we wanted to remind you that we will still be making TTFA episodes on our Patreon and Apple Premium feeds. If you aren't a premium member, we wanted to show you what kind of episodes we make over there by bringing one of our bonus episodes to the main feed. Recently, we asked listeners to send in obituaries about your dead people, and boy oh boy did you all deliver some gems that made us laugh, cry and reeeeeally want to double fist a Dr. Pepper with a Miller High Life. In this bonus episode, Nora reads some of her favorites. _ Find Nora’s weekly newsletter here. _ We’re lucky to only work with sponsors and brands we know and love. Using our links and codes saves you money and supports our independent production! Foria: Experience your juiciest and deepest sensual experience with a bottle of Foria. FORIA is offering a special deal for our listeners. Get 20% off your first order by visiting foriawellness.com/TERRIBLE OR use code TERRIBLE at checkout. I recommend trying their new Massage Oil combined with their Awaken Arousal Oil. You’ll thank me later. BetterHelp: Learn to make time for what makes you happy, with BetterHelp. Visit BetterHelp.com/TTFA today to get 10% off your first month. You can find our full sponsor list here. — Find all our shows and more at feelingsand.co. — Find TTFA on social: TTFA on Instagram | TTFA on Facebook See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

In case you didn't know, we're still making episodes that are available exclusively on Nora's Substack! _ In 2015, Sarah Super was raped by her ex-boyfriend Alex Neal. And she channeled that act of violence into a mission-driven organization that helped survivors of sexual violence feel seen and heard. 9 years after the night that changed her life, Sarah reflects on what it means to move forward with her life and to reclaim her identity as more than a survivor. Sarah was a guest on the first season of our podcast. To hear Sarah's original episode, Unbroken, click here. __ Our Substack is a great way to connect with us and other listeners (and get more Terrible in your inbox). Join us here. __ Find all our shows and more at feelingsand.co. — Find TTFA on social: TTFA on Instagram | TTFA on Facebook See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

In case you didn't know, we're still making episodes that are available exclusively on Nora's Substack! - We have a big update about the future of TTFA, and something a lot of you have been asking about since the last episode, where I mentioned *casually* in the credits that we were going to be taking an indefinite hiatus. I wanted to talk more about what that means going forward, and thank all of you for listening and supporting our show. xo, Nora — You can read the transcript of this update here. — Find all our shows and more at feelingsand.co. — Find TTFA on social: TTFA on Instagram | TTFA on Facebook See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Newsletters from an abandoned safe deposit box set host Paul Ditty on an investigation to learn all he can about The Silver Chain – a suburban Minnesota swing club from the 1970s – and its members. Minnesota journalist Jack El-Hai paints a picture of what suburban life was like in the 1970s and how this sparked a delayed and secret sexual revolution among middle-aged couples. Paul attempts to reach several of the club's members. No one will talk until finally he reaches Carol. She hangs up on Paul, then eventually agrees to talk. But just as Paul is on his way to Modesto for the interview, an email from Carol’s daughter changes his course. Don't forget to subscribe to the Time Capsule feed wherever you listen to podcasts!Links: Time Capsule Substack TimeCapsulePodcast.com Jack El-Hai's Article See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

In case you didn't know, we're still making episodes that are available exclusively on Nora's Substack! - For years, Nancy could picture her ideal partner. She wanted someone who would make her laugh, who would love her son, and who would make her feel confident and empowered. When she met Noa, he checked all the boxes. Everything she thought other people made up about love suddenly came true. But…this perfect love didn’t last forever. Today we hear from both Nancy and Noa as they perform an autopsy of sorts on their relationship and why it didn’t work. – Our Substack is a great way to connect with us and other listeners (and get more Terrible in your inbox). Join us here. The episode transcript can be found here. — We’re lucky to only work with sponsors and brands we know and love. Using our links and codes saves you money and supports our independent production! Foria: FORIA is offering a special deal for our listeners. Get 20% off your first order by visiting foriawellness.com/TERRIBLE OR use code TERRIBLE at checkout. Sundays: Get 40% off your first order of Sundays. Go to sundaysfordogs.com/TERRIBLE or use code TERRIBLE at checkout. You can find our full sponsor list here. — Find all our shows and our store at feelingsand.co. — Find TTFA on social: TTFA on Instagram | TTFA on Facebook See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

In the early 1990s, a cache of abandoned newsletters found its way from a safety deposit box in Minneapolis, Minnesota to the state’s historical society, where they were left to gather dust. The newsletters detailed the inner workings of a secret 1970s swingers society: The Silver Chain Social Club. Fifty years later, TV writer and host Paul Ditty tracks down the club’s surviving members to uncover the group’s mysterious history and the ties that connected its members long after the swingers club closed its doors for good. For a deeper look inside Time Capsule, read Paul's newsletter. Learn more about Time Capsule at timecapsulepodcast.com. See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

In case you didn't know, we're still making episodes that are available exclusively on Nora's Substack! - Greetings, loved ones. We’re back with one of our time honored Terrible traditions: The Grudge Book. Sit back, get cozy, bring your petties, and enjoy this selection of listener grudges featuring the wisdom of Nora and Marcel. THEE Bath and Body Works Peach Bellini Rant Video — Our Substack is a great way to connect with us and other listeners (and get more Terrible in your inbox). Join us here. The episode transcript can be found here. — Find all our shows and our store at feelingsand.co. — Find TTFA on social: TTFA on Instagram | TTFA on Facebook See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

In case you didn't know, we're still making episodes that are available exclusively on Nora's Substack! - Jenni was raised Mormon, and for the first part of her life, was a dutiful follower. She got married young, attended church, and was a loyal wife. But life got messy and complicated for Jenni, and she eventually made a choice that surprised her. A choice considered a sin in her culture, and a pretty hurtful thing to do by the rest of society: she cheated. For the last year, Jenni’s been grappling with the shame and guilt of this choice and how parts of her dating history led to this choice. — Our Substack is a great way to connect with us and other listeners (and get more Terrible in your inbox). Join us here. The episode transcript can be found here. — Find all our shows and our store at feelingsand.co. — Find TTFA on social: TTFA on Instagram | TTFA on Facebook See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

In case you didn't know, we're still making episodes that are available exclusively on Nora's Substack! - Nora sits down with her friend and fellow podcaster PJ Vogt of Search Engine. They discuss what he found in his own interviews with a drug dealer who used fentanyl in his drug supply. That, plus the original Search Engine episode are included here. If you have not yet listened to this week’s TTFA episode, “86 Sundays,” we suggest you go back and listen so you can see why we were inspired to share this Search Engine episode with you. — Original Search Engine episode description: We speak to Luis, a former fentanyl dealer and user who tells us why a dealer might want to put fentanyl in less lethal drugs. Luis also tells us how he learned the rules of dealing, and how the rules changed over his multi-decade career. If you have questions or comments about this episode, or if you'd like to support the show, head to our newsletter: pjvogt.com. — Our Substack is a great way to connect with us and other listeners (and get more Terrible in your inbox). Join us here. The episode transcript can be found here. — We’re lucky to only work with sponsors and brands we know and love. Using our links and codes saves you money and supports our independent production! Indeed: Start hiring NOW with a SEVENTY-FIVE DOLLAR SPONSORED JOB CREDIT to upgrade your job post at Indeed.com/TTFA. Offer good for a limited time. Just go to Indeed.com/TTFA and support the show by saying you heard about it on this podcast. Terms and conditions apply. Need to hire? You need Indeed. You can find our full sponsor list here. — Find all our shows and our store at feelingsand.co. — Find TTFA on social: TTFA on Instagram | TTFA on Facebook See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

In case you didn't know, we're still making episodes that are available exclusively on Nora's Substack! - Feliz lost her sister, Karina, in a horrifying way — in a way that’s quick to draw judgment and condemnation. Feliz has seen the worst of it all, but Karina deserves to be defined by her life, not her death. A warning that this episode includes discussions of drug use and poisoning. Resources: CDC guidelines on how to test drugs for fentanyl Find fentanyl test strips here DrugsData.org provides a rolling update of what's in illicit drugs by geographical area. The data is sent in by strangers, and you might be able to see what’s happening in your city, depending on where you live. The use of NarCan can help prevent an opioid overdose. Check in your local area to find nonprofits that provide training and distribute the medicine. Find how to use NarCan here. — Our Substack is a great way to connect with us and other listeners (and get more Terrible in your inbox). Join us here. The episode transcript can be found here. — We’re lucky to only work with sponsors and brands we know and love. Using our links and codes saves you money and supports our independent production! Indeed: Start hiring NOW with a SEVENTY-FIVE DOLLAR SPONSORED JOB CREDIT to upgrade your job post at Indeed.com/TTFA. Offer good for a limited time. Just go to Indeed.com/TTFA and support the show by saying you heard about it on this podcast. Terms and conditions apply. Need to hire? You need Indeed. You can find our full sponsor list here. — Find all our shows and our store at feelingsand.co. — Find TTFA on social: TTFA on Instagram | TTFA on Facebook See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

In case you didn't know, we're still making episodes that are available exclusively on Nora's Substack! - If your holiday season is feeling less sparkly, less warm, less…happy, you’ve come to the right place! Every year we make an episode about the bad, terrible and subpar side of the holidays and this year’s Happyish Holidays episode is a real doozy. Brianna Liestman shares how every Christmas from 2007-2010, a different member of her family ruined Christmas. There are fires, hospital visits, crying at Kay Jewelers and a shopping spree at Hot Topic! The drama is bigger than Santa's sleigh and will give you a laugh or two if you're needing a pick me up this month. Listen to past Happyish Holidays episodes in our back catalog on Patreon. — Happyish Holidays is a “Terrible, Thanks for Asking“ tradition for everyone who has a complicated relationship with the “most wonderful time of the year.” Our live podcast show—hosted by Nora McInerny and with Marcel Malekebu—brought together a blend of audio, video, and in-person holiday magic. The recording of our 2023 show is available for purchase on our Patreon Shop. If you purchased a ticket to the livestream through The Parkway, are a paid subscriber of our Patreon or Substack, or are a paying subscriber of Nora's Substack, check your inboxes for information on your complimentary access to the recording. __ Our Substack is a great way to connect with us and other listeners (and get more Terrible in your inbox). Join us here. The episode transcript can be found here. — Happyish Holidays is sponsored by Option B. Option B provides practical, compassionate, everyday advice both for those who are facing loss and hardship and for those who want to support their loved ones during life’s hardest moments. When our friends and family are struggling with loss, it’s the absolute WORST. Whether your partner lost a parent, your best friend recently had a miscarriage, or your child is going through a painful divorce, knowing what to do or say over the holidays can leave us feeling helpless and stuck. If you’re feeling unsure of how to help, check out OptionB. There for the Holidays at www.optionb.org/holidays. You’ll find #realtalk holiday cards to send to your family and friends, stories from celebs about how they’ve re-created traditions after loss, and tips you can implement right away on how to show up for your loved ones. Join us at www.optionb.org/holidays and @optionb on Instagram and Facebook for holiday tips and to follow along. — Find all our shows and our store at feelingsand.co. — Find TTFA on social: TTFA on Instagram | TTFA on Facebook See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

In case you didn't know, we're still making episodes that are available exclusively on Nora's Substack! - Kelly loved her dad, then she lost her dad. Kelly loved her grandpa, then she lost her grandpa. Now that Kelly’s a mom herself, she wants to ensure that her son knows he’s loved, no matter what comes. — We still have a few tickets left for our Happyish Holidays live show in Minneapolis Dec 7. Can't make it to Minneapolis? Buy a ticket to get access to the show's livestream! Tickets are $13 apiece, and FREE for our Patrons! (check your email for more information). If you're not a member of our Patreon, now is a great time to join! For less than a ticket price you can virtually attend the show AND get other member benefits you will love. Our Substack is a great way to connect with us and other listeners (and get more Terrible in your inbox). Join us here. The episode transcript can be found here. — We’re lucky to only work with sponsors and brands we know and love. Using our links and codes saves you money and supports our independent production! Indeed: Start hiring NOW with a $75 SPONSORED JOB CREDIT to upgrade your job post at Indeed.com/TTFA. Offer good for a limited time. Just go to Indeed.com/TTFA and support the show by saying you heard about it on this podcast. Terms and conditions apply. Need to hire? You need Indeed. Squarespace: Go to Squarespace.com/TTFA and use offer code TTFA to save 10% off your first purchase of a website or domain. You can find our full sponsor list here. — Find all our shows and our store at feelingsand.co. — Find TTFA on social: TTFA on Instagram | TTFA on Facebook See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices