Simply Convivial: Biblical Homemaking, Homeschooling & Mom Life—Without Burnout

3Rs of Meaningful Housework: simplyconvivial.com/cleanHandle overwhelm better: AnswerOverwhelm.com -- free workshopAs moms, we need to be realistic about what's actually going on behind our grumpy, irritable moods. We might think there's something terribly wrong, that we need to totally revamp our whole life and self, when really we just need to get enough sleep. 3Rs of Meaningful Housework: simplyconvivial.com/clean

3Rs of Meaningful Housework: simplyconvivial.com/cleanI often hear from women who say they were organized when they worked in an office, but they just can’t manage to be – or at least feel – organized at home.What makes it so hard to stay on top of basic tasks? Why is organization so hard to maintain?I think it’s due to both the open-ended and repetitive nature of the job.There are no bosses, no managers, no teachers. There are no paychecks, no grades, no due dates.The tasks, once done, need to be done again, so there’s never the accomplished feeling of finishing.We have to not only make our own plan, but also be the one to follow through on the plan without oversight.Some of us are good at making the plan, but bad at follow-through. Some can follow a task list, but are less comfortable making that list themselves.So homemaking ends up being a challenging position.However, like entrepreneurship, it also offers a unique opportunity to shine, to grow in capacity, and to find fulfillment and satisfaction. 3Rs of Meaningful Housework: simplyconvivial.com/clean

3Rs of Meaningful Housework: simplyconvivial.com/cleanFree Brain Dump Guide: https://www.simplyconvivial.com/braindumpStop using your head like a briefcase because it's making you feel overwhelmed and incapable of handling life. So much of what we do as moms at home doesn't have a tangible result at the end of the day. It's hard to recognize what we've done and be satisfied in it, but that recognition and satisfaction is the attitude adjustment we need to recapture the joy of mothering and homemaking. 3Rs of Meaningful Housework: simplyconvivial.com/clean

3Rs of Meaningful Housework: simplyconvivial.com/cleanMy book - The Convivial Homeschool: https://amzn.to/3rhFLBAWe homeschool to avoid the factory model and give our children an effective learning environment rather than an efficient one. Thus, our home life and our various ages working alongside one another is actually a perk, not a problem.So what do you need to classically homeschool multiple kids? You need good books, time to read and talk about them, thoughtful and engaged brain work, encounters with the real world, and discipleship into living well alongside others. All of these things the home and family come fully equipped to provide.We can’t homeschool well without confidence and independence – freedom – of mind. Classical education should bring both confidence and freedom by its very nature. If it doesn’t, it’s probably not actually classical. In The Liberal Arts Tradition, Kevin Clark and Ravi Jain use this definition: “The ancients believed education was fundamentally about shaping loves….It is for this goal of passing along a culture that the curriculum existed.” Kevin Clark and Ravi Jain, The Liberal Arts TraditionWhile particular practices and day school techniques might not be feasible in the home, giving our kids an education with a classical goal, classical content, and for classical reasons is possible. 3Rs of Meaningful Housework: simplyconvivial.com/clean

3Rs of Meaningful Housework: simplyconvivial.com/cleanFree Workshop: AnswerOverwhelm.comToday we're going to chat about feeling overwhelmed and about practical ways to organize your attitude.Leisa and her husband and three kids have built their own home in Southern Idaho, first living and homeschooling in a camper while the home was under construction. So she knows a thing or two about overwhelm. 3Rs of Meaningful Housework: simplyconvivial.com/clean

3Rs of Meaningful Housework: simplyconvivial.com/cleanWhy habits are hard workshop: https://youtu.be/dge2oieqJysI would stare and shake my head.My roommate in college made her bed - on the top bunk - every single morning.Over 100 miles away from her mom, she made her bed because *she* wanted to.I did not relate. I did not make my bed.The difference was in our habits - AND our habits formed our tastes and desires.Good home habits give peace of mind.“The way you keep your house, the way you organize your time, the care you take in your personal appearance, the things you spend your money on all speak loudly about what you believe. “The beauty of Thy peace,” shines forth in an ordered life. A disordered life speaks loudly of disorder in the soul” - Elisabeth ElliotThe more I do work on establishing order, the more I realize what a peace-giving thing it is. 3Rs of Meaningful Housework: simplyconvivial.com/clean

3Rs of Meaningful Housework: simplyconvivial.com/cleanAmy's Bible Memory resources: https://humilityanddoxology.com/year-of-memory-work/The best way to keep our attitude under control and live out the fruit of the Spirit is to memorize and recite Scripture every day, all the time. Amy gives us some tips and helps to weave Bible memory work into our lives as homeschoolers and women. 3Rs of Meaningful Housework: simplyconvivial.com/clean

3Rs of Meaningful Housework: simplyconvivial.com/cleanOrganization is a SNAP Quiz: https://www.simplyconvivial.com/quizDaily Card Workshop: https://youtu.be/XQ81AJz5_ZMExample planning pages: https://www.simplyconvivial.com/2021/planners-for-moms/#1 - Look at your planner multiple times a day.#2 - Do something from your planner after you look at it; let it guide your choices.#3 - Keep your planner clear and simple.It’s so tempting to think that the only thing keeping us from being organized is the layout of the planner page. If we just had that planner, then we’d finally have it all put together.We spend time setting up or even creating from scratch what we hope will be our perfect planner that will finally work for us, but then it doesn’t.No matter what planner you have, it won’t make your plans happen automatically. That will always take effort, time, attention, and intention – every day.We need to not only have a plan, we need to look at it multiple times a day and we need to then do what it says. 3Rs of Meaningful Housework: simplyconvivial.com/clean

3Rs of Meaningful Housework: simplyconvivial.com/cleanTake the Get Organized quiz: https://www.simplyconvivial.com/quiz 3Rs of Meaningful Housework: simplyconvivial.com/clean

3Rs of Meaningful Housework: simplyconvivial.com/cleanNo More Perfectionism Workshop! https://www.nomoreperfectionism.comPerfectionism trips us all up and sometimes we don't even realize it's our problem. We don't have to do things perfectly to be fulfilling our responsibilities well. Perfectionism is really just a guise for self-centeredness. Listen to Amy Sloan of Humility and Doxology remind us how to give up identifying as a perfectionist. 3Rs of Meaningful Housework: simplyconvivial.com/clean

3Rs of Meaningful Housework: simplyconvivial.com/cleanDaily Card Workshop: https://youtu.be/XQ81AJz5_ZMFree Brain Dump Guide: https://www.simplyconvivial.com/braindumpYoutube version: https://youtu.be/osTM2j8dCLwWe have so many tasks, thoughts, ideas, and appointments we need to keep track of, but sometimes the more we try to get the perfect system in place, the harder it seems to be to stay on top of things. Let's do a working but messy planner and actually accomplish the most important things without getting distracted and overwhelmed. 3Rs of Meaningful Housework: simplyconvivial.com/clean

3Rs of Meaningful Housework: simplyconvivial.com/cleanGet the free EHAP guide: https://www.simplyconvivial.com/ehap and discover how to keep your house mostly tidy most of the time, even with kids.We think of our spaces when we think of getting organized, but we try to make our spaces and lives into things they are not rather than try to make the spaces facilitate more life, more living - not more expression of personal style. Watch the episode on YouTube: https://youtu.be/RpRprsEUhLoDon't forget to listen to part 1 and subscribe so you don't miss a single episode in the series! 3Rs of Meaningful Housework: simplyconvivial.com/clean

3Rs of Meaningful Housework: simplyconvivial.com/cleanWatch the YouTube version with slides: https://youtu.be/0LutEE_zI14Take the quiz: https://www.simplyconvivial.com/quizShare this episode and get the workbook for the series for free! Tell us how and where you shared at [email protected] and we'll reply with the download link. 3Rs of Meaningful Housework: simplyconvivial.com/clean

3Rs of Meaningful Housework: simplyconvivial.com/cleanWe must remember that the point of organizing is not so everything is neat and tidy and clear all the time. The point is that we are ready to do the right next thing; that we are maintaining an atmosphere of love and order in our home; and that our environment supports not only our work, but also the work of our children – the work of learning and growing and thriving.That work is messy.Enter: the island of sanity.To help maintain your calm equilibrium in the midst of the chaotic, messy day-to-day, designate one small area as your own personal island of sanity.When you don’t know where to start, start here.So often, there’s so much out and so much clutter and so much to do that we don’t even know where to start.When you have chosen an island of sanity, you always know where to start. And starting is always the hardest part.Knowing where to start helps you get going and build momentum. Knowing where to start helps you build your habits and appreciate a clear space – even one clear space in the midst of chaotic clutter.Build the habit of keeping it clear.When I was learning to care about cleanliness and neatness, choosing one island of sanity and appreciating this one small spot in a sea of “need to do” around the house helped me so much. 3Rs of Meaningful Housework: simplyconvivial.com/clean

3Rs of Meaningful Housework: simplyconvivial.com/cleanFree pantry printables & guides: https://www.simplyconvivial.com/pantry Abby feeds 40+ people on the regular when it's lambing season - not as a big social event where people bring their polite appetites, but where people are coming in after a long day of hard labor and will go back out again afterward.So Abby has all kinds of tips and hacks up her sleeve to make planning and executing large, hearty, satisfying meals doable on repeat. 3Rs of Meaningful Housework: simplyconvivial.com/clean

3Rs of Meaningful Housework: simplyconvivial.com/cleanFree "plans that stick" workshop: https://www.simplyconvivial.com/unstuckIf we spend time planning but never look at those plans, we're just wasting time. If we make plans that are completely unrealistic, then we're just wasting time planning. If you aren't sticking to your plans, the problem might lie in your planning. Let's talk about how to make better plans AND then stick with them. 3Rs of Meaningful Housework: simplyconvivial.com/clean

3Rs of Meaningful Housework: simplyconvivial.com/cleanEducation as a program, even classically, did not traditionally begin until the child was reasoning. Talk to a 9 or 10 year old child for a time and observe the difference between his thinking process and conversational ability and your 5 or 6 year old. When the oldest is 5 or 6, and he’s followed by younger siblings, he seems so smart, so capable. He is. But he is also still quite young.Whatever you do, don’t try to start Latin with your 5 or 6 year old. Rather, read fairy tales, Aesop’s fables, and begin working your way through the 1000 Good Books list.Don’t construct science experiments. Have him spend hours outside each day, and go to different sorts of outdoor environments to play. In Teaching Science So Students Learn Science, classical school teacher John Mays says that outdoor experience is the best foundation for later science learning, and it comes at a premium in this tech-driven age.Start Morning Time, but not full-blown mimics of those who have older kids and have been doing it for years. Start with 15-20 minutes, including the reading of poetry and nursery rhymes. Pick a hymn and a Psalm to learn, add a new one every couple of months, and in ten years the amount you’ve filled your heart and mind with will astonish you. But it starts with one, not with a full binder.Do not despise the days of small beginnings. 3Rs of Meaningful Housework: simplyconvivial.com/clean

Short circuit the boom and bust cycle by taking advantage of just ten minutes at a time. Don't overthink it.

3Rs of Meaningful Housework: simplyconvivial.com/cleanFind Kortney's resources: https://www.simplyconvivial.com/kortneyWelcome to Simplified Organization, a show for busy moms who are looking for practical help in managing their homes, families, and lives for God's glory. We keep it real without complaining and we help women overcome the overwhelm and perfectionism that comes from the comparison game. In this episode, Kortney shares her menu planning, weekly overview, and weekly review process that helps her keep her plates spinning. 3Rs of Meaningful Housework: simplyconvivial.com/clean

3Rs of Meaningful Housework: simplyconvivial.com/cleanFree Workshop: AnswerOverwhelm.comKortney Garrison is a poet and a homeschool mama of three who works from home as the Community Director for Read-Aloud Revival. She also blogs at kortneygarrison.comWelcome to Simplified Organization, a show for busy moms who are looking for practical help in managing their homes, families, and lives for God's glory. We keep it real without complaining and we help women overcome the overwhelm and perfectionism that comes from the comparison game. Well, my schedule is not excessively busy. I think I fall into the camp of a low energy mom. So even though I do a lot, our schedule is purposefully kept kind of more open and more relaxed because I'm an introvert and at least 2 of my kids are also.We take time to recharge and to, really pursue sort of restful learning is nice, but our days are full. I do work 15 or 20 hours a week from home and homeschool three kids and keep the house running. So there's a lot going on. 3Rs of Meaningful Housework: simplyconvivial.com/clean

3Rs of Meaningful Housework: simplyconvivial.com/cleanfree brain dump guide: https://www.simplyconvivial.com/braindumpThe root cause of procrastination and laziness is most often attitude. Again, ask yourself questions and find out the reason behind your attitude; with that information, fixing your attitude and overcoming procrastination will be simple.Don’t let your mind be a cluttered storage unit itself. Before you clear out all those back rooms, pods, or storage units, clear out your mind. By doing this and by bringing your physical and mental problems before God in prayer, you’ll find that decluttering, organizing, and simplifying your life isn’t actually as hard as you first thought it to be. 3Rs of Meaningful Housework: simplyconvivial.com/clean

You don't need a curriculum for character.

Stefani Mons shares her insights from meal planning, homeschooling, and parenting with chronic illness.

Stefani Mons, a Texas homeschool mom and Convivial Circle Community Manager, chats about what to do when you find yourself too easily irritated with your kids.

3Rs of Meaningful Housework: simplyconvivial.com/cleanTime Budget Resources: https://www.simplyconvivial.com/timeJust like Dave Ramsey has you use cash envelopes for your spending budgets, we can reserve envelopes of time for our various responsibilities across the week.Rather than scheduling 20 minutes for folding laundry, 10 minutes for sweeping, and so forth for every task we have on our list, we can look at our days and weeks as a whole and reserve chunks of time for types of tasks. Then when that chunk of time begins, we can assess the current state of things and decide what comes first and what’s next.A week is never going to play out the way we budget our time, but it’s still a valuable exercise because as we mark out the time commitments we have, we start to see where we have margin, where we need to create margin, and perhaps why things like grocery shopping or phone calls are so stressful – there’s no place for them in the flow of our week!As we start filling in the overview of our weeks with our commitments and responsibilities, we also need to keep an eye on whether or not we have healthy amounts of rest built into our weeks. We can’t function in go-go-go mode all day, every day. 3Rs of Meaningful Housework: simplyconvivial.com/clean

3Rs of Meaningful Housework: simplyconvivial.com/cleanFree pantry printables: https://www.simplyconvivial.com/pantryDawn has worked hard to make meals meaningful times of family relationship-building. She shares her insights and best tips from her years of practice. Meal planning, menu making, cooking, and feeding our family takes a lot of our time - and that's how it should be! 3Rs of Meaningful Housework: simplyconvivial.com/clean

3Rs of Meaningful Housework: simplyconvivial.com/cleanTime budgeting help: https://www.simplyconvivial.com/timeMost of our overwhelm as moms comes from feeling like we don't have enough time to do all the things we need to do.We don't have enough time to do all the things, but we do have enough time to do what we must. We have to be sure we're telling ourselves the truth and choose a right response rather than overwhelm. When time is short, prioritize your family and your vocations without concern for appearances. Humbly serve your family, whether it meets your personal standards or not. We do have the time to do all God's called us to do.Time budgeting help: https://www.simplyconvivial.com/time 3Rs of Meaningful Housework: simplyconvivial.com/clean

3Rs of Meaningful Housework: simplyconvivial.com/cleanFree overwhelm workshop: answeroverwhelm.comWith teens, activities, homeschooling, and work, Dawn Garrett juggles many plates. She is the community manager for Your Morning Basket with Pam Barnhill and she homeschools her three high schoolers who are each busy and active.Dawn shares how she juggles it all and what she does when she feels overwhelmed - and why she doesn't think it's so bad to feel overwhelm. You'll be encouraged by Dawn's down-to-earth and practical insights! 3Rs of Meaningful Housework: simplyconvivial.com/clean

3Rs of Meaningful Housework: simplyconvivial.com/cleanFree brain dump guide: https://www.simplyconvivial.com/braindumpWhat you say to your kids and to yourself matters immensely. Rachael Younger, a mentor-level member of the Simply Convivial Community, shares how she manages and teaches her own self-talk and fixes her attitude by doing so.Find out about Rachael's lego business here: http://youngerandson.net/category/lego/Simplified Organization is a Christian podcast for busy moms who are looking for practical help in managing their homes, families, and lives for God's glory. We keep it real without complaining and we help women overcome the overwhelm and perfectionism that comes from the comparison game. 3Rs of Meaningful Housework: simplyconvivial.com/clean

3Rs of Meaningful Housework: simplyconvivial.com/cleanFind your organization score: https://www.simplyconvivial.com/quizRachael Younger is a busy homeschool mom with multiple projects and interests who knows what it feels like to snap in irritation when kids seem to interrupt. However, our kids aren't interruptions. They're the point. We need to reject our irritation if we want to love our families well. After all, love is not irritable or resentful. This conversation with Rachael, a mentor-level member of the Simply Convivial community, will inspire and encourage you to organize your attitude and love your family intentionally.Find Rachael's Lego business here: http://youngerandson.net/category/lego/ 3Rs of Meaningful Housework: simplyconvivial.com/clean

3Rs of Meaningful Housework: simplyconvivial.com/cleanGet started: https://www.simplyconvivial.com/stop-overwhelmMost of us began our lives as wives and mothers not only without any training or instruction in running a home, but also without any real examples in our own history and life to follow. We want to identify as a homemaker, but still feel uncomfortable doing so.We so desperately want to do a good job, and we jump in with both feet and suddenly find we’re drowning.Modern society conditioned us to think that the job of a homemaker and mom was mundane, simple, outsource-able, unfulfilling work. “So,” we unwittingly think, “I should totally be able to manage this and do a good job.”Then, to our surprise, we find that it’s a lot of work and that we’re wholly unprepared for all it demands of us.​We’ve had no training in how to be homemakers.​Our society is set up to believe that education is meant to prepare you for your work. We go into debt, spend 4 or more years of life, and plan to come out of that ready for a fulfilling career.On the one hand, then, we buy the argument that homemaking is fulfilling and meaningful work, yet on the other hand, we don’t think it takes any real training or education to do it. In what other meaningful work is that the case?Past societies didn’t have the university system. Instead, they relied on apprenticeships and relational training. Children learned how to survive and work from their parents. Tradesmen learned their craft from an experienced master. Knowledge and skill were past on through relationship over time.But mom is home alone with her small children, no one there helping her see what the next thing she ought to do really is. Who will help sort out the details and make it all fit into a manageable whole? We can blame our mothers, but even our mothers, at this point, didn’t have mothers who taught them either.​I designed Simplified Organization Community Coaching to be the mentorship most of us never had, the encouraging cheerleading squad many of us can't find, with the gospel-centered base all of us need.​Starting now and continuing together all year long, we are going to take baby step after baby step and finally find our feet as homemakers.​With Simplified Organization Community Coaching, you'll get the personal development and mentorship you've been seeking, but that Google and Facebook just can never give you.​Enroll today. 3Rs of Meaningful Housework: simplyconvivial.com/clean

3Rs of Meaningful Housework: simplyconvivial.com/cleanHow to handle overwhelm: answeroverwhelm.comMoms have a lot to do. Sarah Mackenzie is no exception. While homeschooling her six kids, she also runs Readaloudrevival.com - a podcast and community to help your family fall in love with reading together. This quick conversation with Sarah will give you ideas you can apply to your own life to find time for what matters most and not let the mundane chores crowd out reading and conversation. 3Rs of Meaningful Housework: simplyconvivial.com/clean

3Rs of Meaningful Housework: simplyconvivial.com/cleanFree Overwhelm Workshop: answeroverwhelm.comSarah Mackenzie, founder of Readaloudrevival.com, is one busy mama. She and her husband homeschool their six kids - including twin boys! - and run a thriving online community and podcast.How does she do it? How does she keep her plates spinning? Is the ever-enthusiastic Sarah ever overwhelmed? You bet. Tune in to find out how she handles it and what she tells herself when faced with an overwhelming to do list. 3Rs of Meaningful Housework: simplyconvivial.com/clean

Homeschooling is hard. Here are 10 reasons why you may need to give up.

3Rs of Meaningful Housework: simplyconvivial.com/cleanGet my new book! https://amzn.to/31nKs2AIt’s one thing to start the school year strong, but quite another to keep at it after the weeks start blurring together. Motivation to homeschool ebbs away, and we can’t wait for some natural, overwhelming incoming tide to return.Instead of being tossed about on the waves of our emotions and hormones (which turn into tropical storms when they crash into the emotions and hormones of our children), we need to treat motivation like a garden and cultivate it. A garden has variety; it’s not made up of one thing. It’s the same with motivation. There are a number of things we can plant in our motivation garden that will keep it blooming and growing.We need homeschool motivation because it’s our responsibility as the parent-teacher to educate our children. It’s not optional and we set the tone for the day and the standard for the behavior. If we can’t muster up the motivation to start the homeschool day, how can we expect our children to have the motivation to do their work? We must model ourselves what we expect from them.Much of the time, what we call a lack of motivation is simply inertia. It’s hard to get started. It’s hard to get up and get moving. It’s hard to focus our attention and summon the energy.Overcome inertia by making it easy to get started with an energetic, upbeat attitude.These ten practices will increase your motivation for average homeschool days.Have a morning routine.Start with a song.Use a checklist.Keep several favorite quotes in view.Smile at your kids.Listen to encouraging podcasts.Get everything ready to go the night before.Share learning with your kids.Ask what they learned or read at dinner.Live life alongside your kids.Share your favorite homeschool quote, podcast, or tip in the comments! 3Rs of Meaningful Housework: simplyconvivial.com/clean

3Rs of Meaningful Housework: simplyconvivial.com/cleanGet The Convivial Homeschool book: https://amzn.to/3reVougWhen homeschool days go bad, we wonder if we are missing something or if there are better ways out there we’re missing. We want a lovely homeschool lifestyle, full of laughter and joy and definitely lots of learning – without tears. How’s a homeschool mom to make that happen?These techniques are how I work toward a better homeschool every day.Best Homeschool Technique #1 – Manage ExpectationsBest Homeschool Technique #2 – Pay AttentionBest Homeschool Technique #3 – Repent Always 3Rs of Meaningful Housework: simplyconvivial.com/clean

3Rs of Meaningful Housework: simplyconvivial.com/cleanSee how your homeschool is doing with the REAL homeschool quiz: https://www.simplyconvivial.com/homeschoolI don’t know about you, but I always start off the year thinking that this year will be more awesome than last because this year I’m committed to really being, well, awesome.This school year will be different because I will be different.So, a decade into homeschooling and having rounded the bend of my thirties, maybe that idealism and optimism is tempered a bit, but I still feel it even if I try to suppress it.Maybe we won’t wake up whole new people on Monday morning, transformed into mothers who do the right thing every time, yet each year – depending on the year – we should try to take the next step in growing, maturing, and increasing.Rather than start the school year with strong but unrealistic goals to be 100% consistent, to never yell, or to always follow the plan, we should go into the year with concrete strategies for exactly how we will improve our teaching and leading skills this year.Be a better homeschool teacher by controlling our toneHaving taught classes to homeschool kids before teaching my own, it didn’t take me long into teaching my own to notice that for a class of other children, my tone immediately changes and I go into “teacher mode.” With my own children, I just stay in “me mode” which seems like it should be better, but isn’t. Maybe it’s “authentic” but it isn’t as helpful.I admit that one reason I still teach classes with other students mixed in with my own is to make it easier for me to enter “teacher zone” and give my kids the benefit of more conscious, purposeful, self-controlled teaching style.Mom’s tone matters. We don’t want our children to feel alone in their troubles and challenges even while they’re sitting next to us. To accomplish that, we can take a positive step and a negative step.Be a better homeschool teacher by controlling our wordsThis could be counted as controlling our tone, but I’m thinking of a more specific situation. In a homeschool day, we have to communicate many things to several people. Have you ever felt frustratingly incapable of that? Have you ever blamed the child for your lack of ability to communicate with him? I know I have (and do).Maybe I’m right and maybe I’m blame-shifting, but what I need is a strategy of communication that lets me cut through the blame and move our day forward.Classical education to the rescue. There’s this thing called Socratic teaching, and it applies in helping with math as much as it applies in literary discussions.Steven Covey made it a principle, a habit, of highly effective people, and highly effective people is exactly what we’re trying to be. He wrote:Seek first to understand, then to be understood.Usually I’m seeking to be finished. That’s where the trouble arises.Be a better homeschool teacher by controlling our thoughtsOur words and our tone are merely overflows of our heart, and we are commanded to take every thought captive. That means it’s possible.We might need to understand and direct our kids’ thought-trains, but we also need to be aware of our own and redirect our own as needed as well.Our thoughts are not inevitable, but our words and tone will flow inevitably from them.So if we want to control our tone and control our words, we need to also control our thoughts. 3Rs of Meaningful Housework: simplyconvivial.com/clean

3 ways to handle perfectionism and get rid of perfectionist tendencies

3Rs of Meaningful Housework: simplyconvivial.com/cleanSNAP into organization QUIZ: https://www.simplyconvivial.com/quizI had put dinner on the table.Wasn’t that enough for one day?To get up and then face the collection of plates, cups, pans, utensils, pots – not to mention the counters themselves.Ugh.Soaking seemed to be the best solution.If the dishes wait, no harm is done.Really, I was being a better housekeeper for putting it all off until the morning.It would take me so much less time, I told myself, to wait until the morning. The dishes would have soaked. I would have coffee. I could knock it out in no time – in the morning.For now, I’ll just go read and forget about this room. I’ve always been good at justifying my procrastination.And so for quite some time I always spent the first part of my day cleaning up from the day before. I refused to feel bad about it. I had made it my deliberate choice and strategy. It wasn’t the worst choice I’ve made in my life, but it didn’t help me, despite my protestations that it did.The idea that helped me break out of this procrastination rut was “clearing to neutral.”If the dishes wait, procrastination wins. Here's one cleaning strategy to beat procrastination.What’s the point?I used to think like this:“What is the point of making my bed? I’ll only sleep in it again.”“What is the point of cleaning the island? I’ll only cook on it again.”“What is the point of washing the dishes? We’ll only use them again.”The dishes can wait because we don’t need them again this instant. Why do them now?But the change started with the dishes. Then I realized it applied to the island. Finally, I even started making my bed due to the same reasoning.We wash the dishes because we’ll use them again.I need to clean the island so that it’s ready to cook on again.Actually, the reason I need to make my bed is so that we can sleep in it again, welcomed to our rest like decent and orderly people rather than collapsing in a mess like slobs.The story we tell ourselves matters.Clearing to neutral is a concept to save us both from perfectionism on the one hand and sloppiness on the other.Perfectionism thinks the point of a kitchen is to be a pristine showpiece. If it is anything other than perfect, it is not acceptable. This can make us either strive ceaselessly to make our kitchen look like no one lives in the house or, on the other hand, give up all attempts to make it look nice because we will never reach our too-high expectations.Sloppiness thinks the point of a kitchen is merely to hold things and to perform certain tasks in. Its state does not matter.Elisabeth Elliot once wrote:The way you keep your house, the way you organize your time, the care you take in your personal appearance, the things you spend your money on, all speak loudly about what you believe. The beauty of Thy peace shines forth in an ordered life. A disordered life speaks loudly of disorder in the soul.Our homes are tools to be used for the building up of people. Tools must be cared for, or they aren’t going to last long or be as effective. But the point is never to have a perfectly organized wall of tools that are never used. The use is the important part, but caring for them is essential to their being able to be used. 3Rs of Meaningful Housework: simplyconvivial.com/clean

3Rs of Meaningful Housework: simplyconvivial.com/cleanAre you a perfectionist? Is the reason for your chaos actually perfectionism?Show notes: https://www.simplyconvivial.com/blog/slob-perfectionist/Those who want all or nothing generally get nothing. I used to think I was not a perfectionist, because nothing I did was perfect. I was a slob, so how could I be a perfectionist?If all-or-nothing perfectionism is our tendency, then we shouldn’t be surprised when we can’t get up off the couch. Why start when we know we won’t accomplish what we’d like?Such perfectionism is debilitating, and it’s that debilitation that causes us to end up in chaos and discouragement that we can’t pull up out of.So how do we, then, pull up out of it? How can we pull up out of ourselves?Recover from perfectionism by practicing baby steps.Perfectionism is the mother of boom and bust cycles: a spurt of energy and enthusiasm propels us forward, but goals give way to reality and, because we didn’t meet the unrealistic goals, we sputter to a halt and give up.Baby steps are not glamorous, they don’t seem significant, but they lead to real, noticeable, tangible progress when we are content to stick with them.When we feel resistance to doing what needs to be done, instead of either trying to grit our teeth and power through, we can make it simpler to start by reducing what we’re expecting from ourselves.Perfectionism is false expectation. We envision the end we want, and if we know it won’t happen, we don’t begin. The best way out is to change what we envision, to take a humbler view of ourselves and our efforts, and submit to imperfect yet faithful next steps. 3Rs of Meaningful Housework: simplyconvivial.com/clean

3Rs of Meaningful Housework: simplyconvivial.com/cleanFind out about our community: https://www.simplyconvivial.com/membershipHear from a number of women about personalizing and customizing a planner to make it work for your life and needs.Planners don't have to be one-size-fits-all and they don't have to be confining or busy work.Keeping a weekly dashboard - in any format - will help you keep your plates spinning when life is hectic and busy. 3Rs of Meaningful Housework: simplyconvivial.com/clean

3Rs of Meaningful Housework: simplyconvivial.com/cleanTake the "get organized" quiz: https://www.simplyconvivial.com/quizHow to set up and organize any planner so that it works for you. Planner organization can seem complicated, but it really doesn't need to be.We can waste a lot of time setting up our planners. Here's the brass tacks of planner set-up:List current projects.Update your calendar so it's complete and correct, with the next 3 months visible.Have a set of lists for your weekHave a list of your daily top 3Have a space for taking notes and keeping running lists and thoughts. 3Rs of Meaningful Housework: simplyconvivial.com/clean

3Rs of Meaningful Housework: simplyconvivial.com/cleanWork Your Plan: https://www.simplyconvivial.com/stop-overwhelm A functional planner depends more on the user than the page templates and formats. You are the secret to your own functional planner, no matter what system you use. Three Rules to a Working Planner: It has a place for projects, notes, and a daily top three You carry it around with you and look at it throughout the day You update it every day, every week, and every quarter It's not the pages, but the process that makes a planner effective and functional. 3Rs of Meaningful Housework: simplyconvivial.com/clean

3Rs of Meaningful Housework: simplyconvivial.com/cleanStop getting distracted and find the motivation you need to get momentum, find focus, make progress.Moms need to know how to stop getting distracted, because it's too easy to lose track of what's important and what needs to be done. We don't want to waste our time.To stop wasting time, we need better time management skills. Those skills include the simple practice of writing things down.We wonder how to stay focused, but it's as simple as writing things down, as brain dumping, to know what's actually on our plate.SHOW LESS 3Rs of Meaningful Housework: simplyconvivial.com/clean

3Rs of Meaningful Housework: simplyconvivial.com/cleanDownload the free guide: https://www.simplyconvivial.com/braindumpWe all know the feeling. You can't focus, you can't think straight. You can't get a handle on life.The truth is that your mind is for having ideas, not holding them.Clear the clutter to free up your creative energy.Three steps:Spend 10-15 minutes everyday writing down the 1. thoughts that make you anxious, 2. the thoughts that repeat themselves, 3. the nagging questions and tasksWhen your mind is uncluttered, you come up with out of the box solutions you'd never have been able to think about when your mind was full of junk. 3Rs of Meaningful Housework: simplyconvivial.com/clean

3Rs of Meaningful Housework: simplyconvivial.com/cleanFind my free brain dump guide here: https://www.simplyconvivial.com/braindumpWhen you're feeling unmotivated, it's hard to get things done. We want to be more productive, but when we're feeling that lack of motivation we drag and dawdle. This one practice is the golden key to overcoming a lack of motivation and kicking your productivity motor into gear.You might wonder how to be more productive when you're feeling unmotivated, and the answer often comes down to acting in the way you want to feel. Whether you're working from home or working at home or both, you want to feel motivated and productive, but it's easy to feel stuck instead. 3Rs of Meaningful Housework: simplyconvivial.com/clean

3Rs of Meaningful Housework: simplyconvivial.com/cleanGet help ending overwhelm & stress: https://www.simplyconvivial.com/braindumpMy quick hack for busy moms will save your sanity when you have so much to juggle. When you're looking for hacks, you usually want a secret you're missing - and I have that for you today.Too often busy moms are go go go and get confused and overwhelmed about what's next. We risk missing life because we were so busy juggling details.My quick and unexpected hack today - a brain dump - is the key process to stopping the cycle and getting clear about what needs to happen next and what is truly important. Your situation is probably not as bad as your imagination is spinning it; brain dump and see reality instead of drama.#busymoms #momlife 3Rs of Meaningful Housework: simplyconvivial.com/clean

Menu planning doesn't need to take a long time. These tips will get you to meal time peace.