Part 2: Learning to Trust Yourself After Gaslighting
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Show Notes
Tara Beall-Gomes and Dr. Rob continue their conversation about next-level gaslighting, including red flag behaviors in therapy, role-playing dialogues that highlight gaslighting language, and the role that a therapist can play in finding closure after years of betrayal. Tara also offers encouragement to a partner that is working to regain their spouses trust, and resources for anyone who is unable to pay for extensive therapy.
TAKEAWAYS:
[1:25] Now he’s gaslighting our therapist?
[3:48] Is gaslighting abusive?
[5:27] Role-play examples of gaslighting, projecting, and controlling.
[10:58] Shame and empathy with rigorous honesty.
[15:43] “I knew all along.” Now what?
[21:37] I can’t believe anything my spouse says.
[25:25] Identifying the core values that drive our reactions.
[32:55] The role of your therapist in finding closure.
[34:50] Red flags in therapy behavior.
[38:52] Next steps when an addict has support and you don’t.
[43:31] How can a partner ever trust again?
[46:15] Encouragement and free resources.
RESOURCES:
Free Sexual Addiction Screening Assessment
Seeking Integrity Podcasts are produced in partnership with Podfly Productions.
QUOTES:
- “Gaslighting is relational and strategic, while lying is an isolated behavior.”
- “Closure is incredibly important in about to find peace, but it doesn’t have to mean agreement.”
- “You can’t derail your own trauma work and recovery when dealing with your partner.”
- “If you want to trust again, you have to trust yourself first.”
- “You are enough, and you can do this.”