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Ep. 117 How Your Attachment Style Impacts Sex and Orgasm with Bev Mitelman
Season 1 · Episode 117

Ep. 117 How Your Attachment Style Impacts Sex and Orgasm with Bev Mitelman

Sex For Couples with Heather Shannon · Heather Shannon

February 10, 20251h 2mExplicit

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Show Notes

Apply for a free Intimacy Breakthrough Call to learn about Heather’s Pathway to Passion coaching method. https://heathershannon.co/new-clients/  

Exploring Attachment Styles and Their Impact on Relationships and Sex with Bev Mitelman


In this episode of the Ask a Sex Therapist podcast, host Heather Shannon welcomes special guest Bev Mitelman, a certified attachment practitioner and founder of Securely Loved, to discuss the intriguing topic of sex and attachment styles. They delve into how different attachment styles—secure, anxious, avoidant, and fearful-avoidant—affect individuals' relationships and sexual experiences. Bev shares insights from her personal journey, explaining how attachment theory has profoundly impacted her own healing. Listeners will learn about the emotional patterns and core wounds associated with each attachment style, and how these influence behaviors in romantic and sexual contexts. The episode also highlights the benefits of moving toward a secure attachment and offers practical advice for those looking to improve their relational and sexual well-being.


00:00 Introduction to Healing in Relationships

00:18 Welcome to Ask a Sex Therapist

00:47 Special Guest: Bev Mitelman

01:04 Bev's Background and Journey

02:41 Understanding Attachment Styles

04:25 Personal Attachment Journey

06:00 Healing and Awareness

14:12 Defining Attachment Styles

15:09 Secure vs. Insecure Attachment

18:02 Anxious Attachment Explained

25:51 Avoidant Attachment Explained

32:30 Understanding the Shame Wound

33:12 Core Wound of Feeling Unsafe

34:13 Anxious and Avoidant Attachment Dynamics

37:56 Fearful Avoidant Attachment Explained

41:25 Attachment Styles and Sexual Behavior

49:38 Impact of Attachment on Orgasms

51:31 Avoidant Attachment and Sex

55:58 Fearful Avoidant Sexual Patterns

01:00:11 Resources and Final Thoughts



WORK WITH HEATHER:


Apply for a free Intimacy Breakthrough Call to learn about Heather’s Pathway to Passion coaching method. https://heathershannon.co/new-clients/  


LET’S CONNECT! FIND HEATHER HERE ⤵️:


Heather’s Website - https://HeatherShannon.co 


Heather’s Instagram - https://instagram.com/AskASexTherapist 


Heather’s YouTube - Check out the video version of this podcast & more! - https://www.youtube.com/@AskASexCoach  


Heather’s Pathway to Passion- https://heather-shannon.mykajabi.com/pathway 


Heather’s Courses- https://heather-shannon.mykajabi.com/store


Heather’s Amazon Storefront- https://www.amazon.com/shop/heathershannonlcpc 


Resources Mentioned:


Come As You Are: https://www.amazon.com/dp/1982165316?linkCode=ssc&tag=onamzheat0ce5-20&creativeASIN=1982165316&asc_item-id=amzn1.ideas.29BK4OTJWL4UF&ref_=aip_sf_asn_list_ofs_mixed_d_qv_asin 


Attached: https://www.amazon.com/dp/1529032172?linkCode=ssc&tag=onamzheat0ce5-20&creativeASIN=1529032172&asc_item-id=amzn1.ideas.2P3GGSWKYMGRE&ref_=aip_sf_list_spv_ofs_mixed_d_asin 


Bev’s Website: https://securelyloved.com/


Bev’s Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/securely_loved/ 


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Ep. 109 Vaginal Gymnastics 101: Increase Your Libido and Pleasure with Bel DiLorenzo- https://youtu.be/3ebUCD63GMM?si=2BnuBIrT4YN0tE_s


Ep. 107 Revive Her Drive: Rekindling Desire, Libido, and Orgasm with @SusanBratton- https://youtu.be/LkPePH3xHTM?si=-fKk9zGvmPfuPan9 



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