RSK XFM

Das lanky pissenstreak (Sturgess in for Karl)

Put some stamps in your garden

Wash up with you?

Little fellas in the kitchen

Hippo-potenuse

There goes 'The Pasty', being stretchered off...

I'm kermitted to this treatment (Have you heard the news toad-day?)

Yeah yeah there's a lot of criminals in the pub, and if I could get to keep the receipts...

He picked him up, put him in a wheelie bin! (my fave episode) (SEE POLL BELOW)

That’s a bit weird, happening in China... where we’re not normally that hairy

I've got 20 minutes, by law! (Sturgess in for Karl week 2)

Mechant! (Sturgess in for Karl)

It's just the right amount

They should be chomping at the bit, they should... they can't believe their luck. You know what I mean? and do I get treated, at least... different? No... Worse!

I wanna fight a businessman

A cat that didn't look happy

Sneaky, aren't they?

I've told you 36 Levis, now put it in a bag and charge me for it

Karl has won!

Too much lying low

Cattlin’ Rustlin’

Fame is a mask that eats into the face

I'd put him in the distance

1918 to 1945 between Travis and the Red Hot Chilli Peppers

There go the frog men

I'd have to see it

Not trying to offend anyone, but they do all look th-

Bermuda Triangle, where people disappear, Bermuda Triangle, don't go near

Were you called freaky lanky four eyed stupid haired goggle eyed freak face... fish face?

Not bright stuff Rick

Yeah definitely Bucks Fizz

Don't let him carry the baguettes

First Sturgess show

Where, what.

You know who that was? That was Mr. Dixon himself

Faye and Claire from Steps are both BNP members

Steve Merchant, with funny glasses, in this place of horror, do you think he scared people, Karl?

A BSC spokesman said the comedian "went on and on about it for nearly 5 minutes".

You're the one that's sad and lonely!

Series 0 Pre-Karl