KNOCK IT OFF Podcast

How Taking Coffee Black Dropped the Freshman 15 and BeyondA lesson in finding contentmentAudio version of post appearing at Knockitoff.Substack.com We want to wish a very Happy Father’s Day to any dad who may be reading, especially to our own Dad and our husbands (who, lets face it, may or may not be reading). We are so very grateful to have them all in our lives.Thanks for reading KNOCK IT OFF! Subscribe for free to receive new posts every Sunday and support our work. This is a public episode. If you would like to discuss this with other subscribers or get access to bonus episodes, visit knockitoff.substack.com

You Think It’s Overkill?We go BIG for recitals.Audio version of post appearing on Knockitoff.Substack.comThanks for listening to KNOCK IT OFF! Subscribe for free to receive new posts every Sunday and support our work. This is a public episode. If you would like to discuss this with other subscribers or get access to bonus episodes, visit knockitoff.substack.com

You might know by now that at a certain point in our childhood, we moved to sunny California. But not the California that comes to mind when you think of the great Pacific Coast or the Hollywood sign or the cinematic scene painted by the “Real” Housewives of Beverly Hills. No, we lived in the middle of the Mojave desert in a small, rather isolated town of about 25,000 people along Route 395.Our dusty city was known as Ridgecrest. Its claim to fame was being the epicenter of earthquakes in the United States. Rumor has it that Ridgecrest also had the highest number of teenage pregnancies per capita in the country at the time, a statistic the city probably wouldn’t want to claim. The initial settlers called the town “Crumville,” with the official name being settled on in 1941 as Ridgecrest (following an intense race between Sierra View and Gilmore). Naturally, we took to calling it Crumville nonetheless.While we are on the topic of Ridgecrest anecdotes, here’s one more piece of trivia for you. The recently-filmed iconic scene with Tom Cruise in the airplane hanger appearing in the intro and ending of “Top Gun: Maverick” took place at the Inyokern airport, a sleepy pass-through town of 857 residents just outside the city limits of its big sister, Ridgecrest. When Kara watched the movie, she recognized the scene without knowing in advance where it was filmed. Dad, a private pilot, used to fly out of Inyokern airport, sometimes with one or more kids as passengers.There isn’t a whole lot to do in Ridgecrest, probably owing to its location, its dry heat, and its size. (The teenage pregnancy rumor is gaining more and more traction….) One summer, while we were attempting to entertain ourselves “laying out” in the backyard on beach towels while our little brother caught massive lizards with his buddy, our parents gave us an incredible gift.They bought a boat.This was a big deal. First, there were the financials. We have no idea what was paid for the boat or how it all came about other than to know that it was purchased used from a family friend, but we could sense this was an investment in fun like no other our parents had ever made. Even as young kiddos, we were intuitive enough to realize that mom and dad had taken a big leap on this adventure.Second, there were the logistics. Where in the desert could one use a boat? How would we learn the pasttime? What would we do on said boat?Third, there was the most important question: when could we take her for the first ride? (Somehow, the two of us missed out on the infamous inaugural outing that included rescuing two young men from a capsized fishing boat. We think it was probably because of a dance performance and a soccer game. But we rarely missed another trip.)About the logistics, dad found the perfect spot in Lake Isabella, just a “short” one-and-a-half hour ride away from our town. On designated boat days, we’d all pile in the blue Suburban with our Bayliner bowrider in tow, and drive out to the lake while fighting over how high to put the A/C and being threatened to “lose rear control” if we couldn’t figure it out among ourselves.As we rounded the corner nearing the lake, we’d spot the sign for the “Dam Korner,” a cleverly named fuel spot and mini mart. This sight would immediately trigger our taking serious license with saying the word dam as many ways and times as possible. We knew we were pushing the bounds when we started calling it the “dam it station,” so we’d typically dial it back at that point.Anyone who owns a boat knows the amount of money and prep work that continues to go into it even after it is acquired. To drive home this point, our dad often says that “BOAT” stands for “bring on another thousand.”To help our parents spend that initial wad, our first order of business was to get our hands on a catalog from Overton’s. Before the days of Amazon and easy shipping from Dick’s and like sporting-goods stores, Overton’s was the one and only source for all things boating. (We’re happy to report that Overton’s is still in business!) We ordered up a slew of O’Neill life jackets in all sizes and bright colors. We got some water skis and ropes. And we purchased Wild Thing.What is Wild Thing, you ask? It’s the name we awarded to a large inflatable rocket that multiple kids could ride at once while trailing behind the boat, waves splashing in our faces, dancing as we held on for dear life, simultaneously singing our famous theme song: “WILD THING . . . You make my heart sing. You make everything groovy. Wild thing. Wild thing, I think I love you. But I wanna know for sure . . .” (Wild Thing looked somewhat similar to this, currently available online from Overton’s, but without so many bells and whistles and bumps to keep the kids onboard. It was the 90’s, man.)Learning how to become a boater seemed to come quite naturally to dad. Mom had her strengths—including packing the most delicious turkey sandwiches, fried chicken, and Chips Ahoy cookies for our outings—but

Stick it to MeThe toddler stage is not for the faint of heartAudio version of post on Knockitoff.Substack.comThanks for listening to KNOCK IT OFF! Subscribe for free to receive new posts every Sunday and support our work. This is a public episode. If you would like to discuss this with other subscribers or get access to bonus episodes, visit knockitoff.substack.com

Why I Chose to Pressure Wash on Mother’s DayA lesson in finding solitude through sprays and humsAudio version of post on Knockitoff.Substack.comThanks for listening to KNOCK IT OFF! Subscribe for free to receive new posts every Sunday and support our work. Knockitoff.Substack.com This is a public episode. If you would like to discuss this with other subscribers or get access to bonus episodes, visit knockitoff.substack.com

From Us to YouA love letter to all mothering figures.Audio version of post appearing at Knockitoff.Substack.comSubscribe for free and receive new posts every Sunday! Please rate and review. This is a public episode. If you would like to discuss this with other subscribers or get access to bonus episodes, visit knockitoff.substack.com

‘It’s Over?!’ ‘It’s Over.’ ‘So…How’d I do?’A lesson on mourning the end of youth sports. Audio version of post at Knockitoff.Substack.comSubscribe for free at Knockitoff.Substack.com to support our work and receive new posts every Sunday! This is a public episode. If you would like to discuss this with other subscribers or get access to bonus episodes, visit knockitoff.substack.com

An Open Letter to Ronald GladdenThe Hero of Jury DutyWe interrupt our regularly-scheduled Sunday programming on motherhood, life, and all things in between to write an open letter to Ronald Gladden, the only real person in the hit Amazon mockumentary, “Jury Duty.”**Special thanks to Johnny Mac of The Daily Comedy News Podcast for turning us onto Jury DutySubscribe for our weekly posts on life, motherhood, and all things in between. Knockitoff.Substack.com This is a public episode. If you would like to discuss this with other subscribers or get access to bonus episodes, visit knockitoff.substack.com

Smile! It’s Picture Day!A candid convo about an outmoded tradition.Audio version of post appearing at Knockitoff.Substack.comThis week, we tried a new writing/reading style. Instead of a collaborative story with a collective voice, we had a conversation in which we each gave our own insight. Let us know what you think about this style! We also started a chat for subscribers where we are sharing our spring kid picture experiences. Find it at Knockitoff.Substack.com and tell us all about your picture woes.Thanks for listening to KNOCK IT OFF! Subscribe for free to receive new written posts every Sunday and support our work. Knockitoff.Substack.com This is a public episode. If you would like to discuss this with other subscribers or get access to bonus episodes, visit knockitoff.substack.com

What Are Your Goals?Avoid Emotional Breakdown at Gym ClassAudio version of post appearing at knockitoff.substack.comPlease subscribe for weekly posts! This is a public episode. If you would like to discuss this with other subscribers or get access to bonus episodes, visit knockitoff.substack.com

I Feel So Bad For YouA lesson on humility in writing. Audio version of the post appearing on knockitoff.substack.comPlease subscribe for weekly posts! This is a public episode. If you would like to discuss this with other subscribers or get access to bonus episodes, visit knockitoff.substack.com

Just Blow on Her FaceThe universe has a funny way of paying us backThanks for listening to KNOCK IT OFF! Subscribe for free at knockitoff.substack.com to receive new posts and support our work. This is a public episode. If you would like to discuss this with other subscribers or get access to bonus episodes, visit knockitoff.substack.com

DANGLE THE CARROTA lesson in being a dugout mom (Audio version of post)Subscribe to weekly posts for free at knockitoff.substack.com This is a public episode. If you would like to discuss this with other subscribers or get access to bonus episodes, visit knockitoff.substack.com

WARNING: THIS PARTICULAR EPISODE CONTAINS AN EXPLICIT WORD. DUE TO A GLITCH, WE ARE UNABLE TO MARK ONE EPISODE AS EXPLICIT. IT’S F.A.C.!A lesson in not taking life too seriously.Audio version of post appearing on knockitoff.substack.com Subscribe for free at knockitoff.substack.com and receive weekly posts every Sunday! This is a public episode. If you would like to discuss this with other subscribers or get access to bonus episodes, visit knockitoff.substack.com