Dilemmas & Decisions: Why It’s So Hard to Stop Yourself from Over-reacting in High-Conflict Situations
How do you manage your quick reactions to people with high conflict personalities? Is there a way to get emotionally unhooked? Bill and Megan talk about tools to help control over-reacting to HCPs.
It’s All Your Fault: High Conflict People
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Show Notes
Stopping yourself in a high-conflict situation doesn’t come naturally for most. We get frustrated when things escalate quickly and wonder why we took the bait once again. Of course, the brain is involved so it comes down to unconscious reactions, but can they be overcome? Can we get emotionally unhooked?
In this episode, Bill and Megan discuss:
- the dilemmas that come from people with high conflict personalities, instead of solutions
- why we get hooked by their dilemmas — the brain interactions
- how to override our defaults when they happen on the spot
- why we need to stop and use a Dilemmas & Decisions list before diving in with our natural defaults when we have time to think
- Doing Instead of Stewing
Links & Other Notes
- BOOKS
- It’s All Your Fault! 12 Tips for Managing People Who Blame Others for Everything (see Chapter 9: Analyze Your Realistic Options)
- COURSE
- ARTICLES
Our website: https://www.highconflictinstitute.com/
Submit a Question for Bill and Megan
All of our books can be found in our online store or anywhere books are sold, including as e-books.
You can also find these show notes at our site as well.
Note: We are not diagnosing anyone in our discussions, merely discussing patterns of behavior.
- (00:00) - Welcome to It's All Your Fault
- (00:36) - Why Do We Keep Reacting?
- (01:18) - Overriding Defaults
- (05:51) - Building the Neuron Connections
- (09:22) - Dilemma and Decision List
- (20:23) - Reminders & Coming Next Week: Confirmation Bias