H.O.P.E - Hang On Pain Ends

This one starts with me feeling pretty aggravated and a bit defeated. But by the end, I am in a much better place ... so I am happy I recorded when I did ... I just needed to talk it through. I hope this one helps for those out there that ARE OK ... but you are feeling like others don't believe you. It is also for the ones that are WORRIED that someone is NOT OK... ask them once, if they tell you they are, and their actions do not show otherwise, please just be happy for the version of themselves that deep down you knew they were always meant to be.

"You you have so many relationships in this life, only one or two will last. You go through all the pain and strife, then you turn your back and they're gone so fast." - MmmBop - Hanson.Whether you like boy bands or not, I invite you to listen to this episode that talks about stopping and remembering what it is that you LOVE, and making sure you make time for that in your life. So this HANSON episode one is another dedicated to you Dad, who woke up at 4am many years ago, taking me, my sister, cousins, and friends to see Hanson at Arthur Ashe Stadium in QUEENS, New York ... and never complained! In fact he was leading the charge! I love you Dad ... and will ALWAYS and forever be a Hanson Fan!

This one starts with the frustrations of shoveling snow for the first time in my life .... and then ends up talking about Celine Dion, Divorce, Self-Harm, the movie Ghost, and how I feel like Whoopie Goldberg talking to My Dad in Heaven! And of course, at the ending off with the message we all should know by now.... please keep holding onto that H.O.P.E - Hang On Pain Ends.

Let's Lighten this place up after that last one! This is definitely one that was fun to make .. because it went in a different direction as I kept talking! For those of you out there ... who sometimes just hear a song lyric ... or connect with a song and you don't understand why ... this one is for you! After you listen to this episode, I ask that you create a NEW playlist on Spotify ... called "H.O.P.E" and fill it with songs that have meant something to you at different stages of your life ... to remind you, how far you have come, and the adventure of H.O.P.E that lies ahead of you!

TRIGGER WARNING - This episode discusses heavy themes of Suicide Ideations. Please do not listen if this is something that is difficult for you (or if you know me, love me, and would have missed me... bc this is a very hard to hear).This is by far, the most emotional episode I have shared so far. I would not recommend listening while driving ... (especially after my last episode about the detours)! But this one is very real ... and I think SO many people who are struggling out there NEED to hear this. Keep holding onto that H.O.P.E - Hang. On. Pain. Ends.

This was an epiphany I had (while going to the bathroom... but that is besides the point)! About a time years ago, where I took on responsibility for something that happened to my sister, because of MY illness. The crazy thing? After I recorded this, but before posting it, I sent it to my Sister ... and she sent me back a voice note, saying that she wanted me to know, when she looks back on this... she NEVER had any connection that MY illness had ANYTHING to do with what happened to her... and she also shared, that the feeling I am having at this moment .. this drive and passion, and feeling like "this is exactly what I should be doing at this moment" ... is how she felt, after she lost the job, and started on her new journey. She said "Sis, I've never been happier that my life took that detour ... so, I am giving YOU the green light now! Keep going sis .. follow those signs, prepare for greatness."

This one reflects the fears that I know some of you have right now. So I know I "happened" to find this letter at the perfect time. (Thank you Dad). Just know, I have the tools in place, I have worked very hard to get where I am, and I won't let any of you down. Thank you for listening.

This one is more of a coffee shop chat! I touch on a few different topics ... with the big take away being.. I am realizing perhaps the reason I've had more "bad days" than "good" .... is because of the anger I have been projecting onto the world ... or on to my teddy bear? You have to listen to understand that one! Anyway .... as always, please listen until the very END - to get the message of H.O.P.E! l

I have to thank my Dad for this one... I swear, these words are him, he is telling this Story. THIS is something that I feel EVERYONE out there should hear ... and maybe listen to more than once. If I had heard this from someone years ago... I might have had this wake up call a lot earlier - but then again, it all happens in the way it's meant to. My platform started as a seed, focused on my struggles and stories with my mental illness, Bipolar Disorder. But NOW.. I am going to grow this thing into the most blooming flower you have ever seen. I am going to start sharing so many other things ... and I would love your feedback, give me a topic that you want me to discuss or journal about! I'll even dedicate it to you! The listener ... who I started all of this for... the only thing I ever want from all of this? Is to help people. Help the ones that at this moment, are not able to help themselves .... which, unfortunately, is most of us. But no matter what, always remember ... don't ever lose H.O.P.E - Hang. On. Pain. Ends.

So today (1/25/26) is the day that I created this podcast ... I've taken a lot of entries from the past, and will share them or have shared them here. But THIS one... I just recorded, and it encapsulates what I hope to do here ....and when I say "here" I mean, on this Earth. I truly feel sharing my story is my "life's work" ... I saw this as a very clear vision while in my last manic episode back in 2017 .... and now I am determined to make sure i have NO regrets ... and I do everything I can to bring this message of having H.O.P.E to as many people as will listen. This one really brought out a lot of emotions ... I think because it literally all JUST happened ... I mean, it's HAPPENING now... none of my work has even been made public yet, so I am taking a risk. But... as I said in my high school yearbook... "The Only Regrets in Life - are the Risks You Didn't Take." - Thank YOU for listening ... and for being my RISK! Hang On. Pain Ends.

This is where my dream started back in 2018 where I shared my story on a stage in NYC presenting with an amazing mental health organization "This is my Brave." ... After this performance, my life took a turn in a different direction, and my story went on the shelf. My light went out, my passion was lost ... but now? I lost my dad suddenly, a few weeks later came so close to losing my mother ... so something has changed within me. Life is too short for me NOT to share my story. All I want is for my message of HOPE to convince at least ONE person, to Stay here ONE more Day. This world deserves you, and you deserve everything.Also - If you would like to see the "O.G" performance (and see the face that matches the voice) take a look on You Tube - you can search "Alana Michaels - This is my Brave" - you can't miss me!