Be a Self-Regulated Queen: Permission to Feel

Hey lady! You know we’re all about our gentle growth and continuous improvement over here so we’re excited to share an episode that will help grow your toolkit for whatever life may bring your way.

As we heal and process it’s common to notice where your childhood has yet again shaped your behavior and caused patterns that at one time seemed normal but now no longer serve you. Growing up in environments where our caregivers were doing the best they could with the tools they had means that we may not have always had the space to be your full self. And, if you grew up in a Black household it’s entirely plausible to not be allowed to feel your feelings and bury them instead.

But, we’re grown now and you are not only allowed to feel your feelings but you are encouraged to and there are frameworks that can help. This week, Dr. Dom and Terri present the RULER method, a powerful tool that can help you make your way through difficult and complex emotions so that you can remain in your sovereignty and stand in your integrity.

This five-step method can help you meet life as it comes, which will help you loosen the grip of needing to control life. Understanding your emotions offers you more choice in your experience, which can lead to feeling more stable, grounded and having increased capacity to feel the richness and beauty that life has to offer you. 

Using RULER in Real Life
· Recognizing: “How do I know what I’m feeling? What signals does my body send?”
· Understanding: “Where did this emotion come from? Is it layered with past wounds?”
· Labeling: Talk about the power of language—using words like “disrespected” vs “angry.”
· Expressing: “Who is safe to share this with? What’s an empowered way to show this?”
· Regulating: Tools and tips (breathwork, journaling, therapy, movement, prayer, etc.)

Quote of the Day:
“If you don’t know what you’re feeling, it’s hard to know what to do with your feelings.” 
– Dr. Marc Brackett  

Goal Mapping Starter Guide
Cultivating H.E.R. Space Sanctuary  

Resources:
Dr. Dom’s Therapy Practice
Get That Pitch Workshop: Turn your story and expertise into speaking gigs, media features, and collaborations, without a publicist. Visit GetThatPitch.com and Use code HERSPACE for a special listener discount.
Melanin and Mental Health
Therapy for Black Girls 
Psychology Today
Therapy for QPOC  

Where to find us:
Twitter: @HERspacepodcast
Instagram: @herspacepodcast
Facebook: @herspacepodcast
Website: cultivatingherspace.com

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