Cinephobe

Zach, Amin and Mayes are for scuba in this romantic comedy as a risk averse Ben Stiller tackles dating advice, ethnic food, blind ferrets, throw pillows, and horrendous pick up basketball in his pursuit of Jennifer Aniston. Yes, this is the podcast from crocodile tears. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Zach, Amin and Mayes travel to Columbus, Ohio for a gritty, hard hitting, action movie starring Cinephobe Legend John Travolta. Pitbull's best friend is slamming Cleveland Reserve bourbon, picking up smoking again, getting tattoos, and reconnecting with his old partner to seek vengeance because the bible told him to, or something. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Zach, Amin and Mayes double dip with another horny 80s teen supernatural comedy. An alleged cult classic (?) that features dick soliloquies, barbershop rap groups, predatory psychics, mysterious disappearances and a little brother with an undiagnosed eating disorder leads to yet another unforgettable podcast. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Zach, Amin and Mayes throw in the proverbial towel with the horniest Cinephobe movie to date. Jason Bateman's debut comes in a classic coming of age college romp, complete with Trans Am Douchebags, southern temptresses, and flying bowls of pudding. This podcast is a dog. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

The movie they didn't want us to see led to the podcast you just can't miss. Zach, Amin and Mayes take a jaunt north of the border to scenic Vancouver, leisurely ride around on motorcycles, take an impromptu trip to the aquarium, and blow up the entire train depot in pursuit of a missing child who holds the key to important nano technology. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Zach, Amin and Mayes turn in their guns and badges for another odd couple cop comedy that serves as indie darling Kevin Smith's first and only sell out. Bruce Willis and Tracy Morgan encounter a mastermind child car thief, a baseball obsessed drug dealer, and a parkour expert who dabbles in tasering, all while suspended, in order to pay for Bruce's daughter's wedding. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Zach, Amin and Mayes unite to discuss the odd couple partnership between a foul mouthed youth and a piece of Wonderbread in a cop's uniform, but still find plenty of time to tackle important subjects like Octavia Spencer's career and Richard Gere's fertility. (Neither Spencer nor Gere appear in this movie) Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Zach, Amin and Mayes open a time capsule chock full of very specific references from 2003 disguised as a parody film. We tackle semantic arguments, when a reference is just straight up theft, and announce the top 5 worst child actors in Cinephobe history. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Zach, Amin and Mayes get back in the Cage, quite literally this time, as they take an elusive white jaguar back to America in the hopes of turning it into a house on Pine Lake. Dumb kids, baby monkeys and scurvy engineers might try to stop us, but they'll never take our whiskey and cigars. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Zach, Amin and Mayes are given an idea by Joy Behar to take one week off from their marriage to truly awful movies. They learned club analysis from Coakley, ate Gary's special brownies, and entertained Hog Head's hypotheticals, but in the end they returned to Cinephobe changed men. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Zach, Amin and Mayes have just been released from prison after 5 years and despite people telling them not to, they just can't help but review this Mark Wahlberg / Peter Berg movie. Spoiler Alert: This movie is set in Boston. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

This week on Cinephile, Adnan revisits the film that finally earned Martin Scorcese his elusive academy award for directing. Does the electric ensemble cast present a strong enough argument to join Marty's Mount Rushmore? You'll have to listen to find out. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Zach, Amin and Mayes return to Hong Kong for the thrilling conclusion of Double Impact. That's right, there's two of them, so put down that bottle of whiskey, just chill out and listen. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Zach, Amin and Mayes are welcomed to Hong Kong with the 1991 action classic starring the Muscles from Brussels himself twin brothers seeking revenge on the men that killed their parents. They have the same accent but one of them only wears pastels and the other never puts out his cigar, so that's how you know they're different. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Zach, Amin and Mayes navigate the anti liberal mishegas and overt sexuality of this 1990 kids movie smash hit. We discuss little league play by play announcers, the magical talents of John Ritter, and Amin still wants to do Cinephobe on a train. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Zach, Amin and Mayes are going straight...to...the wild wild west to cross dress, engage in racist roast battles, battle enormous mechanical spiders, and save the United States with the 1997 steampunk western. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Zach, Amin and Mayes get their diamond rhinestone black leather vests out for Hunter Dunbar to autograph in a movie starring John Travolta, who's essentially a Cinephobe co-host at this point, and the film auteur Fred Durst. We've got scooter sequences, homages to Misery and Reservoir Dogs, and one of Amin's best ever connections to a classic film. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Zach, Amin and Mayes put on John Gotti's old suits, and they can still smell the cologne. This disastrous film starring John Travolta and directed by E from Entourage certainly delivers when it comes to incoherence and Pitbull songs. Travolta is making his case to be the Cinephobe poster boy. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Zach, Amin and Mayes dive back into the Eszterhas universe as a couple of lawyers acting like cops on the hunt for a mysterious killer known only as Jade. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Zach, Amin and Mayes watch a movie selected by the fans in the Discord, and boy was it a mistake to give the people the power. We investigate dinosaur and aviary anatomy, whether the term "soft skin" is racist, and dive deep into the off camera ramifications that caused Oscar winning actress Whoopi Goldberg to appear in this straight to video disaster. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Zach, Amin and Mayes continue to spiral deeper and deeper into the dregs of Hollywood to discuss the movie that either caused or was caused by the celebrity couple Bennifer (that's Jennifer Lopez not Jennifer Aniston). We speculate on the lives of Nick Saban look-alikes, debate Al Pacino's merits as a yeller, and question what this podcast is even about anymore. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Zach, Amin and Mayes are just a couple of ghosts, free to podcast about any movie they choose! And they chose the $150 million dollar Michael Bay Netflix epic that starts with a 20 minute car chase sequence. Assemble your team and jet set around the world to get revenge on the made up dictator that ruined your charity photo op. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Zach, Amin and Mayes travel to the north pole for a holly jolly Christmas edition of Cinephobe. We're repossessing Plasma TVs and buying real estate from Survivor winners in order to reconnect with our estranged family and save Santa's business! Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Zach, Amin and Mayes strap in to the learning machine for one of their worst movies yet. In the year 3000, man-animals last hope is a dreadlocked white man named Jonny Goodboy in the battle against nine foot tall disgusting middle managers on the crap filled factory known as Earth. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Zach, Amin and Mayes take a jaunt back to the time when Dane Cook was on top of the world, and the world was made up of MySpace and comedy CDs. Based on a short story by a Los Angeles architect, this mystical rom com has a fascination with boobs and unlimited penguins. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Zach, Amin and Mayes bust out their thickest southern accents for this rare sequel that is better than the original. We discuss elegant handshake techniques, fuck marry kill scenarios, and finally determine whether "Bend her over a barrel and show her the 50 states" is actually a saying. From the stacked cast to the rat-a-tat joke filled banter, this movie is a rollicking good time, even Tony Medley agrees! Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

The movie so jam packed with nudity it needed a whole second episode to cover every nip and snatch. Zach, Amin and Mayes fawn over Gina Gershon, respect honest apologies and tally up the number of times our main character storms out of a scene. Cinephobe is headed straight to the top! We don't need an understudy. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Zach, Amin and Mayes bare it all to discuss the cinematic supernova that is 1995's Showgirls. This movie ruined multiple Hollywood careers, but it becomes the first Cinephobe to earn a sequel. In part 1 of the podcast, the gang crushes on Gina Gershon, worries about James' job security, and Amin reveals something from his past that made him exceedingly prepared to discuss this film. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Zach and Amin take on the first movie to get a Cinephobe treatment while still in theaters. The Ang Lee directed, Will Smith dual role cloning action thriller is filled with distracting visuals and has been bouncing around Hollywood development hell since 1997. On track to be one of the largest box office flops of the year, this is a podcast you won't want to miss. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Zach, Amin and Mayes brave the storm of the century to steal a bunch of money bound for the shredder. We've got hackers, terrible southern accents, a knock off Batmobile, powerful senses of smell, and pallets full of action. Tensions are high here at Cinephobe, so check it out before we tear ourselves apart like a Cat 4. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Zach, Amin and Mayes take a road trip to Cabo and get sick of each other when the red flags start flying. This 2007 film featuring Ben Stiller teaches us about spinning elaborate webs of lies, jackhammers, immigration, and pussy crushing counting. Will this podcast make it past the honeymoon phase? Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Zach, Amin and Mayes jump 15 buses to pay for their step dad's conveniently priced surgery as they crash into this 2007 debut feature film from the Lonely Island. You are all invited to join our crew, once you pass initiation, but just remember that I am the one that parties. That's a flavor! Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Zach, Amin and Mayes break the fourth wall to discuss Skip Woods' 2001 masterpiece of cinematic scriptwriting, Swordfish! Stanley Jobson (Hugh Hackman) is the man for the job, and he's just trying to get his daughter back from the Porn King of southern California. Whether you're here to research Halle Berry's role in the film or just a die hard Thomas Jefferson truther, this is the movie for you. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Zach, Amin and Mayes review the movie released by Disney on Christmas Day 1997. Join us as we contemplate the origin of the name Quincy, the relevance of companies Compaq & Nortel, and which NBA owner most resembles the main character. Zach speculates on the origin of the eggplant emoji and Amin wonders whether Mission Impossible or Mr Magoo revolutionized the cable drop. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Zach, Amin and Mayes put their jobs with good benefits on the line as we break down the 2004 Wayans Bros classic. Our longest episode to date might put you in a wheelchair, but don't worry the feeling will come back. Whether you only recognize Vanessa Carlton because of this movie or know that she had an absolute banger two years before, this is the podcast for you. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Completing the Cage trifecta, take a journey with Zach, Amin and Mayes to SummersIsle, but don't expect any of that signature Royal Honey because last year's harvest was a disaster. This island in the puget sound is full of creepy silent men, chanting female twins, ominous bee keeping outfits and jarred fetii, but this film comes down to one crucial editing mistake. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Zach, Amin and Mayes go behind enemy lines to decode Spies Like Us, one of Amin's favorite's from the 1980s. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Zach, Amin and Mayes are back to grapple with the 2008 Orlando Brawler classic, Never Back Down, featuring the gentleman from Amistad. Join the Cinephobe gang as they explore the specific time period when you would print out Mapquest directions and the facility of dental dams to a caucophony of awful late 2000s music. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Zach and Amin are brought to the brink of rage at Mayes' pick, the space opera Jupiter Ascending. They discuss Channing Tatum saying words he clearly can't define, whatever it was Eddie Redmayne was going through in this movie, and the proper way to clean a toilet. Protect your telescope at all costs, and most of all, respect the honesty of bees. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Zach, Amin and Mayes get in the Cage yet again, staying up all night with overflowing glasses of whiskey to decrypt "Knowing". Join us as Amin cross examines the accuracy of telephone habits and TiVo recordings while Zach gives insight into the mind of an alcoholic MIT professor. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Zach, Amin and Mayes take a routine expedition in a tiny raft to the Land of the Lost, the 2009 remake of the 1974 TV show starring Will Ferrell and Danny McBride. Join us as we answer important scientific questions such as “If you shot a ton of pot at the sun, would it burn up and get everybody high?”. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

You might be asking, what's next for Cinephobe? The answer of course is the 2007 Nicolas Cage classic Next. Zach, Amin and Mayes see this movie two minutes at a time and discuss one of the worst endings (if you can even call it an ending) ever. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Zach, Amin and Mayes present Cinephobe, a podcast on the Count The Dings Network that showcases their shared affinity for bad movies. This week they tackle Kangaroo Jack 2: G'Day U.S.A.!, and even though Amin fell asleep and Zach was playing games on his phone, they still have plenty of takes. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

The Podcast where Zach Harper, Amin Elhassan and Anthony Mayes review movies that are poorly rated on Rotten Tomatoes, and try to ascertain whether or not those movies are accurately poorly rated, or maybe just didn’t get a fair shake. Cinephobe! Wherever you get Podcasts! Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices