Chatabix

One of the Chatabix regulars comedian Rosie Francis takes Joe & David to one of her gigs.. She walks them in and introduces them to a a couple of familiar faces before showing them the stage. David and Joe feel nervous as if they are about to do the gig and want to know every little detail. Rosie takes it all in her stride and has a chat with some of the punters before she does her set. Follow Chatabix on Twitter & Instagram: twitter.com/chatabix1 www.instagram.com/chatabixpodcast/ Patreon for early access to our eps: https://www.patreon.com/chatabix Crunchy fresh tees and hoodies: https://chatabixshop.com/ Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Award winning Music Producer William Orbit chews the fat with David & Joe. He's sold 200 million recordings worldwide but has a few tech issues getting on zoom. William walks them around his flat in Venice and shows them the view out of his window before giving them a history lesson. He's been writing some new tracks which he's excited about as his assistant has been bopping to them. William tells them about working on a drum loop with Madonna. He tells them how he got into music at the age of 23 playing dusty old instruments in a squat. David tells him about his song Happy Happy Girl. Williams new album: https://www.williamorbit.com/ Follow Chatabix on Twitter & Instagram: twitter.com/chatabix1 www.instagram.com/chatabixpodcast/ Patreon for early access to our eps: https://www.patreon.com/chatabix Crunchy fresh tees and hoodies: https://chatabixshop.com/ Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Joe wants to know know about David's camping holiday but they never get there. They discuss their wonderful new headphones from Flare Audio and its phallic packaging. David struggles to say anything as he has builders milling about his office. He feels awkward speaking in front of them so talks to Joe by signing. This prompts a new jingle. Natalie Cassidy drops by so Joe and David can ask her to host their Right Move podcast idea Follow Chatabix on Twitter & Instagram: twitter.com/chatabix1 www.instagram.com/chatabixpodcast/ Patreon for early access to our eps: https://www.patreon.com/chatabix Crunchy fresh tees and hoodies: https://chatabixshop.com/ Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Where's Joe Now ? He's gone on an adventure and zooms David to show him where he is. Annoyingly it's a place David knows very well and used to go there when he was young. Joe gives David a tour anyway and they get very excited when they find out that one of Elton John's album cover was shot at the location. Joe trys to recreate the album cover. They get to meet some of the people who work there and find out loads of interesting facts. David waves Joe off as he carries on his journey. Follow Chatabix on Twitter & Instagram: twitter.com/chatabix1 www.instagram.com/chatabixpodcast/ Patreon for early access to our eps: https://www.patreon.com/chatabix Crunchy fresh tees and hoodies: https://chatabixshop.com/ Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Comedian Josh Widdicombe is today's guest chewing the fat with Joe and David. They hope Josh brings his A game and ask him what's in it for him. Josh is a Blur obsessive and excitedly tells a story about exchanging emails with Damon Albarn. They talk about all being at the Blur concert. Josh brings up Paul Daniels and they perform magic tricks for each other. It takes over an hour for Josh to finish his Steve Davis anecdote. David asks Josh about winning FHM 'Comedian of the Year' 15 years ago. Obviously they touch on the chartz. Follow Chatabix on Twitter & Instagram: twitter.com/chatabix1 www.instagram.com/chatabixpodcast/ Patreon for early access to our eps: https://www.patreon.com/chatabix Crunchy fresh tees and hoodies: https://chatabixshop.com/ Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Joe & David are wearing the same coloured tee shirts which makes them uncomfortable. They think they look like scaffolders. Joe tries to get out of doing the rollercoaster ep and they chat about possible scary rides he could go on. They revisit the Right Move pod and David suggests getting someone else in to host it and creaming off the top. David's going on a walking holiday in Cornwall but is worried he will pull his achiles and has bought some walking sticks. They discuss fellow podcaster Jarlath Regan and think he has a silky voice. They ask him to record a voice note to soothe them. Follow Chatabix on Twitter & Instagram: twitter.com/chatabix1 www.instagram.com/chatabixpodcast/ Patreon for early access to our eps: https://www.patreon.com/chatabix Crunchy fresh tees and hoodies: https://chatabixshop.com/ Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Regular guest Andy Goldstein is on the pod, he confesses to being a bit jealous when they have other guests on that are not him. Andy tells them he knows Jane Torvill and she came to his wedding. They play 'guess the correct answer' game to try and find out why she came to the wedding and quiz Andy about all the Celebrities that went to his wedding. They obsess about Lee Sharpe. David and Joe try to persuade Andy to get them jobs hosting a TV Sport Show for middle aged men. Andy's specialist subject on Mastermind is Goodfellas so the guys ask him some questions. He doesn't do very well. Follow Chatabix on Twitter & Instagram: twitter.com/chatabix1 www.instagram.com/chatabixpodcast/ Patreon for early access to our eps: https://www.patreon.com/chatabix Crunchy fresh tees and hoodies: https://chatabixshop.com/ Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Joe has arranged a surprise guest for David. David has no idea who it is and has to sit in the spinny chair to wait for the guest. It seems to take ages and David is a bag of nerves. When the guest arrives Joe tells David to spin round in his chair to see for the first time who the guest is ! Who can it be ? Follow Chatabix on Twitter & Instagram: twitter.com/chatabix1 www.instagram.com/chatabixpodcast/ Patreon for early access to our eps: https://www.patreon.com/chatabix Crunchy fresh tees and hoodies: https://chatabixshop.com/ Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

David & Joe chat about supporting their football teams and how long it takes to get to the ground. They talk about staying on a Pirate Ship, farting in yurts and the joys of family holidays and David reads out some riddles for Joe to guess. They both rate this ep against the rest of the terrible eps they have done but think it's ok because they are owning it. They puzzle over why the pod has gone up in the charts even though they are doing less eps and only ever talk about being in the charts. Follow Chatabix on Twitter & Instagram: twitter.com/chatabix1 www.instagram.com/chatabixpodcast/ Patreon for early access to our eps: https://www.patreon.com/chatabix Crunchy fresh tees and hoodies: https://chatabixshop.com/ Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

David goes to Berry Pomeroy Castle allegedly the most haunted castle in England. It's getting dark and the castle is closed so he scales the locked gate and calls Joe. It get's darker. He get's more spooked. He hears noises and wonders if he will see the ghost of the Blue Lady. As he approaches the castle he starts to think someone is watching him. He decides it's not worth it just to get the pod in the charts. Joe tries his best to get David to go and sit on the bench next to the castle. David's had enough and runs back to the car in the pitch black. Follow Chatabix on Twitter & Instagram: twitter.com/chatabix1 www.instagram.com/chatabixpodcast/ Patreon for early access to our eps: https://www.patreon.com/chatabix Crunchy fresh tees and hoodies: https://chatabixshop.com/ Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

David & Joe sing the Bolero theme tune while they wait for Olympic ice skater Jayne Torvill. When she arrives they both blush. They have a good chat about Heathfield and ask Jayne if she's ever bumped into David's mum. They talk about the highs and lows of competing for olympic medals. Jayne tells them she fell in love with ice skating at a young age persuading her mum to buy her some white boots. She tells them about choosing the Bolero music and how her and Christopher Dean did all the choreography. David asks how long it would take for her to train him up to be a figure skater. They talk about the celebrities on Dancing On Ice and Joe asks Jayne why she's not married to Chris. Follow Chatabix on Twitter & Instagram: twitter.com/chatabix1 www.instagram.com/chatabixpodcast/ Patreon for early access to our eps: https://www.patreon.com/chatabix Crunchy fresh tees and hoodies: https://chatabixshop.com/ Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

It's the morning of David's trip to Berry Pomeroy Castle to go ghost hunting on his own in the dark. He tells Joe the story of the castle which is allegedly one of the most haunted sites in the British Isles. David is pretending not to be scared. Joe is worried that David won't be able to get in if it's locked up at night. They worry there isn't much tension in the ep but then David gets a call from his wife who has just spotted a celebrity in a bright red sports car being pulled over by the police. David remembers what he is doing that evening and thinks he may cry while Joe giggles at him. He tries to get out of it. Joe ends the ep with a bit of juggling. Follow Chatabix on Twitter & Instagram: twitter.com/chatabix1 www.instagram.com/chatabixpodcast/ Patreon for early access to our eps: https://www.patreon.com/chatabix Crunchy fresh tees and hoodies: https://chatabixshop.com/ Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Ex 'Deal Or No Deal'contestant Paul Gorton is back on the pod but this time telling David and Joe about how he hurt his lung playing football. This ends up in a long winded story with Paul revealing all about his footballing career and his famous friends. When he finally get's round to the story of the collapsed lung it's actually pretty scary. David feels a bit queasy. Joe's been watching a game of walking football and suggests this might be the way forward. Follow Chatabix on Twitter & Instagram: twitter.com/chatabix1 www.instagram.com/chatabixpodcast/ Patreon for early access to our eps: https://www.patreon.com/chatabix Crunchy fresh tees and hoodies: https://chatabixshop.com/ Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Historian Andrew Chatterton reveals the long-hidden secrets of an undercover resistance network set up during WW2 in case of German invasion. He tells David & Joe about networks of civilians who appeared to be leading normal lives but were undertaking training in sabotage and guerilla warfare (and not telling their families what they were up to). David & Joe are hanging off his every word. He goes on to explain about a network of hidden underground bunkers which would have been used to slow down the Germans advance. They decide Andrew must get a lot of date nights with his fascinating stories. Joe decides he doesn't want the job of Patrol Leader as he might have to assasinate someone. Andrew's book 'Britains Secret Defences' available here https://www.casematepublishing.co.uk/britain-s-secret-defences.html Follow Chatabix on Twitter & Instagram: twitter.com/chatabix1 www.instagram.com/chatabixpodcast/ Patreon for early access to our eps: https://www.patreon.com/chatabix Crunchy fresh tees and hoodies: https://chatabixshop.com/ Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

David & Joe have an idea for a property podcast. They talk about the format and how it might work but then realise they'd have to do it properly and speak faster with more energy like Phil Spencer. David get's sidetracked by his phone notifications pinging. They argue about how to end the episode. To test the format David finds Joe three random properties in Jarrow to choose from and realise they've made the property equivalent of Blind Date. Follow Chatabix on Twitter & Instagram: twitter.com/chatabix1 www.instagram.com/chatabixpodcast/ Patreon for early access to our eps: https://www.patreon.com/chatabix Crunchy fresh tees and hoodies: https://chatabixshop.com/ Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Our TV reviewer Joe is back. He's also a guitarist at ABBA Voyage and tells Joe & David that he has now done over 350 shows. TV Joe bursts David & Joe's "thats what she says" bubble telling them the phrase has in fact been used a lot in the American Office. After they get over the annoyance of this, they talk about TV game shows and join in a rowdy game of Name That Tune. They tell TV Joe how popular he is as a regular guest on the pod and talk about getting old. TV Joe doesn't get around to doing any TV reviews. Follow Chatabix on Twitter & Instagram: twitter.com/chatabix1 www.instagram.com/chatabixpodcast/ Patreon for early access to our eps: https://www.patreon.com/chatabix Crunchy fresh tees and hoodies: https://chatabixshop.com/ Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

World champion cyclist Sir Chris Hoy is today's guest. He confesses to being a fan of the pod and loves listening to David's cackles. He tells them some brilliant stories about what it's like track centre during the big competitions. Joe get's confused between a backdraft or a slipstream so Chris explains how the slipstream works. David asks Chris if he's ever peed himself during a race. They talk about Chris's stunning legs and he tells them what it feels like standing on the podium after winning olympic gold. Chris shows them both how to do a press up properly. Chris Hoy has his own podcast Sporting Misadventure available here https://pod.link/1680181306 Follow Chatabix on Twitter & Instagram: twitter.com/chatabix1 www.instagram.com/chatabixpodcast/ Patreon for early access to our eps: https://www.patreon.com/chatabix Crunchy fresh tees and hoodies: https://chatabixshop.com/ Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

In this special ep David and Joe are joined by George Kane the Director on Apocalypse Clown (the film David was in). George explains it's a bonkers dystopian comedy set in Ireland with 4 anarchic clowns on a road trip. David Earl plays Bobo, one of the clowns. George says how brilliant David was in the film and they discuss what it's like telling actors what to do. It's not long till the chat turns to drivel. David shows Joe his clown nose, they compare stories of working on set during the covid days and coming across a wall of Ben's. Apocalypse Clown is coming to Irish / UK cinemas September 1st. There's an early screening at The Prince Charles Cinema, London on Weds 30th August Tickets here: https://princecharlescinema.com/PrinceCharlesCinema.dll/WhatsOn?f=28268531 Follow Chatabix on Twitter & Instagram: twitter.com/chatabix1 www.instagram.com/chatabixpodcast/ Patreon for early access to our eps: https://www.patreon.com/chatabix Crunchy fresh tees and hoodies: https://chatabixshop.com/ Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Joe's off on another adventure and zooms David to show him where he is. He's at an allotment but who's allotment is it ? David googles the shit out of it and is over the moon when he finds out the story behind it all. Joe's friend (a comedian also called Joe) gives them both a guided tour and they try to recreate some scenes. They move on to another location and beard Joe can't contain his excitement ! Guide Joe gives them both a thoughtful gift to end the show. Follow Chatabix on Twitter & Instagram: twitter.com/chatabix1 www.instagram.com/chatabixpodcast/ Patreon for early access to our eps: https://www.patreon.com/chatabix Crunchy fresh tees and hoodies: https://chatabixshop.com/ Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

After several minutes of tech issues at Martin's end Joe and David get to guff about how brilliant they think he is. They try and glean from him how to also be brilliant. David tells Martin about his first acting job on Inspector Linley and forgetting to learn his lines. Martin is a bit perplexed about David's obsession with behind the scenes on a tv show, he tells them about filming the Office and sharing the building with real people working down the corridor. They talk about bedtime routines and Martin tells them what time he goes to bed. Joe tells Martin about crying when his hero Roachford came on the pod. Follow Chatabix on Twitter & Instagram: twitter.com/chatabix1 www.instagram.com/chatabixpodcast/ Patreon for early access to our eps: https://www.patreon.com/chatabix Crunchy fresh tees and hoodies: https://chatabixshop.com/ Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

David & Joe analyse how other hosts start their pods and then try to talk as quickly as possible, obsessing over the charts once again. They do a bit about if they were a football team who they would be, who the big hitter pods would be and where they all would be in the league. Listening to Joe's '3 Dayz A Week' song' David reads out some comments from Patreon and has a sing of it himself. David finally shows Joe his painting which is framed and hanging in the hallway. Joe phones his mum to ask if she can take a photo of a painting he did of a ballerina shoe when he was 14. He shows it to David and they talk about whether Joe's mum really likes the picture or if she has just been humouring Joe for 30 years. Follow Chatabix on Twitter & Instagram: twitter.com/chatabix1 www.instagram.com/chatabixpodcast/ Patreon for early access to our eps: https://www.patreon.com/chatabix Crunchy fresh tees and hoodies: https://chatabixshop.com/ Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Natalie Cassidy is back on the pod talking more bollox with David and Joe. She tells them about her trip to Wimbledon and her appearance on Parenting Hell. They talk about holidays in Cornwall and enjoying art. Nat & Joe try to persuade David to show them his painting. They collaborate together to write a poem. Natalie writes the first line... they turn it into a game show called Stick It Up Your Arts. Natalie gives her opinion on the pod going to three days a week and puts the cat amongst the pigeons. Follow Chatabix on Twitter & Instagram: twitter.com/chatabix1 www.instagram.com/chatabixpodcast/ Patreon for early access to our eps: https://www.patreon.com/chatabix Crunchy fresh tees and hoodies: https://chatabixshop.com/ Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

WBO Cruiserweight Champion Chris Billam-Smith is on the pod. Joe asks him if he wears his WBO belt around the house. David shows off his boxing gloves and puts them on the wrong hand. Chris tells them about his training programme, feeing nervous before sparring, his journey to becoming a world champ and being in the changing room pre-fight. They find out how Chris got his moniker 'The Gentleman', then discuss his choice of shorts and wonder who would win in a fight between David and Chris. Follow Chatabix on Twitter & Instagram: twitter.com/chatabix1 www.instagram.com/chatabixpodcast/ Patreon for early access to our eps: https://www.patreon.com/chatabix Crunchy fresh tees and hoodies: https://chatabixshop.com/ Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

David and Joe chat about going to 3 days a week and the added pressure of trying to make good eps. David tells Joe about a family event he attended when the adults were getting on it dancing to hip hop. They talk about what it would have been like in their parents day at a fete with a cup of squash and mum listening to Jennifer Rush. The postman comes in again. After analysing the podcast a bit they start doubting if they are any good at it. They talk about the episode charts, being loads behind Wolf & Owl and levels of awkwardness 'doing a bit'. Follow Chatabix on Twitter & Instagram: twitter.com/chatabix1 www.instagram.com/chatabixpodcast/ Patreon for early access to our eps: https://www.patreon.com/chatabix Crunchy fresh tees and hoodies: https://chatabixshop.com/ Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Part two of an ongoing chat about David's cricket match. The chat starts with David & Joe having the realisation that in their heyday they weren't actually very good at cricket or football and they have, in fact been living in a dream. David tells Joe a bit more about his day playing cricket at The Valley Of The Rocks and how he felt donning his shin pads and going out to bat. He talks Joe through his performance on the pitch, getting recognised by the groundsman and refusing to down a 'man of the match' pint. Follow Chatabix on Twitter & Instagram: twitter.com/chatabix1 www.instagram.com/chatabixpodcast/ Patreon for early access to our eps: https://www.patreon.com/chatabix Crunchy fresh tees and hoodies: https://chatabixshop.com/ Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices