Youth Culture Today with Walt Mueller

Parents, today I want to ask you a question that you might find a bit odd. The question is this, Are you doing what you can to convince your kids that they are indeed sinners? Listen to these words from the late Martyn Lloyd-Jones. I cannot imagine a worse state for anybody to be in than for him or her to say he or she does not feel he or she is a sinner. The Holy Spirit convicts and convinces us of sin, and if He has not done it for you, if you value your own soul, ask Him to do it. Christ came to die for sinners, not for the righteous, and the first work of the Spirit is to convict of sin, of righteousness and of judgment. We come to Christ for salvation after the Spirit has convinced us of sin, because the Lord Jesus Christ is the answer to our need.” Parents, because we live in a world that scoffs at the Gospel of Jesus Christ, we increasingly believe in the goodness of human beings, which leads us to forget that we are sinners in need of a Savior. Be sure your kids are aware of their sin and their need for Jesus!

Recently, the Center Against Sexual and Family Violence in El Paso, Texas, began raising awareness among their constituency about a new type of dating violence they were seeing among teenagers. It’s being called digital violence, a name that captures the changing realities of life for children and teens as they grow up in a smartphone and social media saturated world. Using the digital tools they have at their fingertips, along with the growing number of artificial intelligence options, teens as young as middle schoolers are creating and distributing images of their dating partners which compromise and undermine trust. In addition, there is the creation and spread of rumors, both visually and textually. Parents, we are living in the Wild West when it comes to life on the digital frontier. Pay attention, and always look for ways to teach your kids to live counter-culturally to the glory of God. As Paul says in Romans twelve, this is the spiritual worship to which we are called.

One of the most essential lessons we need to teach our children and teens is that God calls them to be responsible stewards and caretakers of their bodies. In First Corinthians Six, the Apostle Paul tells us that we are to honor God with our bodies. We are to care for them as an act of worship. For parents, this means that we must warn them about being careful about what it is that we put into our bodies, as that can effect them either positively or negatively, both now and for the rest of their lives. A recent study published in the Journal of the American Medical Association found that cannabis use among adolescents increases their risk of being diagnosed with anxiety, depression, bipolar disorder, and other psychotic disorders up to and including age twenty-five. Doctors are reporting seeing patients who have used cannabis developing these mental health issues. Parents, teach your students to steward their bodies to God’s glory, educating them to worship God through self-care.

It’s a fact that many of you who are listening to my voice right now are weighed down under the burden of a child or grandchild who has entered into rebellion and walked away at some level from you and from the Church. I know that this is a heartbreaking load to carry. And when you are carrying it, you are often led to feel like nobody understands or nobody is willing to step up and carry the load with you. I want to remind you of the words Jesus has spoken in Matthew 11:28. He says, “Come to me, all of you who are weary and over-burdened, and I will give you rest! Put on my yoke and learn from me. For I am gentle and humble in heart and you will find rest for your souls. For my yoke is easy and my burden is light.” Along with Saint Augustine, we can pray these words for each other, “Lord, those who are bowed down with burdens you lift up, and they do not fall because You are their support.” Burden-bearing parents, may the Lord bless you today with a deep sense of his promised peace.

Are you, like me, tired of all the boasting that goes on on social media? Are you tired of having to face the temptation of giving in to the pressure of comparison which fuels that broken human desire of working to keep up with the Joneses? For those of us who are old enough to remember what life was like in a world without the distraction of social media, we long for those days when boasting and comparison, while certainly something that existed, didn’t hammer us twenty-four seven through a digital device. Today, I want to encourage you to be someone who teaches your kids to navigate social media with a First Corinthians one thirty one attitude, while teaching your kids to do the same. First Corinthians one thirty one tells us this, “Let the one who boasts, boast in the Lord.” All of us, young and old alike, need to realize that our lives should be centered not only the glorification of ourselves, but on the glorification of God. Imagine how things would change if that were the case.

As we get ready to celebrate power of the Cross and the Resurrection of Jesus this weekend, I want to ask you if you’ve taken any time to talk with your kids about the earth-shattering significance of what it is that we will be celebrating. The fallout from our culture’s growing reality of biblical illiteracy hit me hard when a couple of years ago on the day after Easter my daughter-in-law, an athletic trainer at a large suburban high school, shared with me a conversation she witnessed between a group of a dozen student athletes who were in the training room. Everyone was chatting about their Spring Break when one of the students asked, “What the heck is Passover and Easter about?? I know nothing.” Multiple kids agreed that they didn’t know the story, and some jokingly said, “I think it’s something about Jesus. . . maybe his birthday.” Over the course of this weekend, why not read Matthew chapters twenty six, twenty seven, and twenty eight together as a family?

The TikTok video was titled, “Go to bed old, wake up hot.” The video is just one in the growing number of online tutorials posted by social media influencers to get women and girls using what’s called “the morning shed” routine. Wanting to know more about this new viral trend, I watched as the girl on the screen removed and peeled off all kinds of multi-colored patches, masks, wraps, mouth tape, chin straps and I don’t know what else more as she demonstrated another attempt at finding meaning, value, and purpose in outward appearance as opposed to inward character. Of course, medical experts are warning parents to keep an eye on this trend, as many of these products can harm the skin of our children and teens. But even more than that, we need to consider the hearts of our girls as they seek to squelch their insecurities with an expensive and even dangerous bedtime and morning routine. Parents, we need to raise our kids to counter-culturally glorify God through their spiritual growth.

For those of us who have experienced the death of someone we love, we spend more time thinking of them when the calendar turns to the anniversary of their death. On this day in twenty twenty, my father died and went into the presence of Christ at the earthly age of eighty-eight. The late Tim Keller penned these words about death: “Rather than living in fear of death, we should see it as spiritual smelling salts that will awaken us out of our false belief that we will live forever. When you are at a funeral, especially one for a friend or a loved one, listen to God speaking to you, telling you that everything in life is temporary except for his love. This is reality. Everything in this life is going to be taken away from us, except one thing: God’s love, which can go into death with us and take us through it and into his arms. It’s the one thing you can’t lose.” Keller’s words are good, true, right, and so reassuring. Friends, precious in the sight of the Lord is the death of his saints.

It’s spring and the farmers are out in force prepping their fields and planting seeds with the hope and anticipation of a bountiful harvest. There’s a new trend among our kids that’s all about farming, but not in the way our professional farmers are now farming here. No, our kids are involved in what’s called “aura farming.” In the teenage world, someone who has aura is someone who has the same kind of glowing presence as the top social media influencers, beloved celebrities, and people who ooze coolness. Aura Farming is the term used to describe the act of doing things online to boost your cool factor in the eyes of the world that’s watching you on social media. In essence, you’re farming and fishing for the social capital of likes, positive comments, and a growing number of followers. Parents, this is a troubling trend as our kids are going to look for love and attention in all the wrong places. Lead them to find their identity, purpose, and value in Jesus Christ and not in the eyes of others.

The beverage coolers in one of our local quickmarts take up almost two entire walls. There’s everything in there from a variety of water products, to carbonated soft-drinks, to energy drinks. Many of the beverage products in those coolers are what would be known as SSB’s, or sugar-sweetened beverages. It’s no secret that our children and teens largely favor these ssb’s, as they are packaged and marketed in ways that attract their attention, along with the fact that kids have always loved the taste. A new study reported in the Journal of Human Nutrition and Dietetics reminds us that these drinks and other sugary foods do contribute to childhood obesity and type 2 diabetes. But the study also found that there’s a connection between high sugary drink intake and increased anxiety in teenagers. Parents, you are called to keep watch over and steward your child’s physical and mental health. Control your child’s intake of sodas, energy drinks, and sweetened juices.

Paul Kingsnorth has written an engaging and thought-provoking book on technology which serves to warn us by looking ahead to the dangers that are coming due to our un-thinking embrace of all things digital. The book is titled Against The Machine: On The Unmaking of Humanity. Kingsnorth’s analysis should serve as a wake-up call to all of us, especially parents, as he shares how the individuals behind the rapid development and acceleration of Artificial Intelligence keep pushing ahead while admitting that they don’t know where AI is headed. Kingsnorth writes that “many of them seem to be actively frightened of what is happening, even as they make it happen.” He tells us that when these AI developers were polled for their opinions, over half of those involved in developing AI systems say they believe there is at least a ten percent chance that they will lead to human extinction. This begs a question: are we listening? Tread carefully and with wisdom into new technologies.

As a parent, what is your posture regarding how your kids will best navigate today’s youth culture? I want to warn you against two dangerous postures. Some parents take the approach I call false optimism. It’s an approach that looks at the world and with a shrug of the shoulders says, “No need to worry, Everything is going to be alright.” Truth is, the collective lot of children and teens hasn’t gotten any better. False optimism leads to forfeited influence because there’s nothing anyone needs to do. Another dangerous posture is what I call alarmist pessimism, which looks at the world and says, “It’s so bad and so far gone that nobody can do anything about it.” Not only does this view belittle God, but it too forfeits parental influence because there’s nothing anyone can do. I would like to encourage you to take the approach of biblical realism, as you seek to accurately understand the culture forces out there, so that you can responsibly lead your kids into navigating all of life to God’s glory.

The title of a research study from the University of Hawaii recently caught my eye. The study title is this: “Frequency of Negative Adult Spectator Behavior at Adolescent Sporting Events.” Any of us who have attended a youth sporting event or who are raising young athletes know the sideline behavior of parents is often concerning, and sometimes even appalling. The introduction to the study recognizes that youth sports are a popular extracurricular activity that can support the physical, social, and emotional development of children and adolescents. But based on our current youth sports spectating culture, the researchers also recognize that there are detrimental aspects, including negative parent behavior, which in turn effects young athletes negatively. Researchers found that with eleven to fifteen year old youth baseball, there were an average of 5.2 negative adult spectator behaviors per game. Parents, we need to do better. Let’s not turn youth sports into and identity maker or breaker for anyone!

Are you aware that Time Magazine’s 2025 Person of the Year is actually a group, rather than an individual? Named as winner were the “Architects of Artificial Intelligence,” an award which is given for the transformative impact AI is having on our culture and lives. Being given the title does not always signify a positive contribution, but rather the most influential contribution. AI is truly changing our world and our lives, at a speed of cultural change never before seen. One example of AI’s negative influence is how its being used for voice cloning and voice phishing. A person receives an urgent phone call or voicemail. The voice of a relative or friend, cloned by AI, then feigns an emotional or financial panic, asking you to wire money or make a credit card payment immediately. AI is truly making us wonder if we can trust anyone or anything anymore. Security experts suggest every family has codewords to be used to verify a caller’s identity. This new world requires caution on our part.

Parents, do you understand that seeing your kids come to Jesus is not just about belief, repentance, forgiveness, and eternal life? Something else has to happen after our kids accept Christ as their Savior. Salvation is not just about justification, but about a lifetime of sanctification. We become followers of Jesus who integrate the Christian faith and kingdom of God into all of life. Theologian David Wells describes it this way: “True conversion is not an isolated experience but one that is related to a life of discipleship. Discipleship belongs to and should follow from conversion the way that natural life belongs to and should follow from live birth. And just as there is no discipleship without conversion, so there is not conversion with an ensuing life of discipleship that involves growth in moral maturity, a deepening faith, and loving service.” The goal of our parenting should be to nurture our kids into a compelling faith that transforms every area of their lives.

All this week we’ve been looking at barriers to lasting faith and the reality that far too many kids are leaving high school, home, and church, then heading off to college and walking away from their faith. In his helpful article, Why Youth Stay In Church When They Grow Up, Pastor Jon Nielson lists three reasons that are present in the lives of young people who continue to embrace and grow in their faith long after high school graduation. First, they have been truly converted. Rather than simply being happy that our kids are attending youth group, we should be praying that the Gospel would be preached into their lives and embraced by our kids. Second, they have been a part of a youth ministry focused on equipping rather than entertaining. While fun is present, the focus is on leading kids deeply into God’s Word and the life of discipleship. Finally, kids who grow up and continue to grow in their faith have parents who lived and preached the Gospel to them.

All this week we’re looking at barriers to lasting faith and the reality that far too many kids are leaving high school, home, and church, then heading off to college and walking away from their faith. Pastor Jon Nielson believes that one of the foundational reasons for this is that our kids have not grown up in homes where their parents have preached the Gospel to them. My own forty years of experience has taught me that when it comes to faith, kids are most likely to grow up to embrace the beliefs and behaviors they’ve seen and heard lived and taught by mom and dad. Of course, kids who grow up in non-Christian homes can come to saving faith. And, kids who grow up in strong Christian homes may launch on a Prodigal journey. Parents, don’t rely on the youth pastor and youth ministry to nurture your children in the faith. They are there to assist you as you endeavor to grow in your faith, and in turn lead out of your own spiritual maturity as you raise your kids for Christ.

All this week we’re looking at barriers to lasting faith and the reality that far too many kids are leaving high school, home, and church, then heading off to college and walking away from their faith. Pastor Jon Nielson believes that one of the foundational reasons for this is that our kids have been entertained by our youth group efforts rather than equipped to live the difficult life of discipleship. He reminds us that in Ephesians, Paul tells us that Christ gave teachers to equip the saints for ministry and to build up the body of Christ. Youth workers need to see themselves primarily as teachers. Have we taught our students well if they graduate from high school without good Bible-reading habits, Bible-study skills, and strong examples of discipleship and prayer? If not, we’ve lost them. Youth workers, it’s good to build loads of fellowship and fun into the youth group experience. But if that’s all there is, we’ve done more to win kids to fun, than to a lifetime of following Jesus.

All this week we’re looking at barriers to lasting faith and the reality that far too many kids are leaving high school, home, and church, then heading off to college and walking away from their faith. Pastor Jon Nielson believes that one of the foundational reasons for this is that our kids have not been converted to the faith. Nielson says that we all too often settle for our kids being nominal Christians or pretty good kids. In Second Corinthians five seventeen, Paul tells us that anyone who is in Christ is a new creation. Salvation is a miracle that comes from the glorious power of God through the working of the Holy Spirit. Nielson believes that we need to stop being pleased with attendance at youth group and retreats. Instead, we need to get back to a focus on conversion and trust God’s Spirit to bring about change as we preach, teach, and talk to our kids. Converted kids are hungry to know God’s Word. Converted kids go on to love Jesus and serve the Church.

Several years ago here at CPYU we began what we call our College Transition Initiative. This initiative was our response to the concern parents, youth workers, and pastors were expressing regarding the growing percentage of youth group kids who had been raised in Christian homes, but had then gone off to college and pushed either the pause or stop buttons on their faith. It was as if they were jettisoning everything they had learned while growing up, in order to live what’s now seen as a normal college life void of Christian commitment. We realized that perhaps we aren’t nurturing or discipling young people correctly, leaving them with a mutation of the Christian faith that at the very least is just an ad-on to the rest of life, or at the very worst not even Christian faith at all. Parents, we are called to nurture our children and teens in the faith, teaching them the truths of God’s word and trusting God’s spirit to change their hearts. Stick with us all week, as we look at barriers to lasting faith.

Several of my youth worker friends are reporting that many kids in their youth groups are feeling increased loneliness. The data supports this growing widespread epidemic of loneliness. God has made us for relationships, and when the pressures of life, the breakdown of the family, over-scheduling, and increased time focused on screens combine, it's a perfect storm resulting in feeling alone. Sadly, Common Sense Media reports that three in four teenagers are now using AI for companionship. And, in an effort to find emotional and mental health support, many are relying on non-human chatbots to counsel and guide them through their struggles. Common Sense Media has issued this stern warning: “Teens should not use AI chatbots for mental health or emotional support. AI chatbots are not safe and reliable for these purposes.” Parents, our kids need real flesh and blood relationships, starting with you. That is the first step in stemming the tide of teen loneliness.

Parents, today I want to encourage you to have your family attend a church where the adults, teenagers, and children all worship together rather than going their separate ways when they walk into the building. By doing this, they will be afforded the opportunity to see the faith modeled by other adults. Writer Steve Garber knows the valuable role the inter-generational Christian community plays in the spiritual awakening, growth, and nurture of kids. He writes, “For individuals to flourish they need to be part of a community of character. Community is the context for the growth of convictions and character. What we believe about life and the world become plausible as we see it lived out all around us.” Parents, your kids need to experience the full breadth and depth of the larger body of Christ. God will use your church and wide diversity of members, young and old alike, to celebrate and affirm all that you are teaching them as you nurture them in the home.

One of the slang terms you might hear male teenagers use these days is “homiesexual.” We all know that a homie is someone who is a close friend. The term homiesexual can be used in a variety of ways, and it’s always helpful to ask just what a person means when they say it. One of the most common definitions applies the term to male friendships that are deep and intimate in emotional ways. Sometimes these friendships defy traditional masculine gender roles, as the homies hug and cuddle without any homosexual feelings or inclinations. In other contexts, the term could refer to a homosexual attraction to or relationship with someone who is a friend. It’s always a good thing to ask for clarification when the term is used because of the full spectrum of meanings. We are reminded once again of our need to dig into God’s Word to help our kids come to an understanding of the gender binary, and the purpose and place of sex, which is in the context of a heterosexual, monogamous, covenantal marriage.

In his book Against The Machine, writer and thinker Paul Kingsnorth contends that thanks to digital technology and advances in AI, we are moving into a world that is governed by Algorithm’s and AI, rather than by God-imaging humanity. In essence, we are letting the machine guide and direct our lives. I want to encourage you to take note of the four values the Machine is promoting. First, there’s a reliance on science rather than faith in God’s revelation to define the nature of reality. Second, the highest good that’s promoted is to serve and advance one’s self, rather than living a life of sacrificial selfless Christ-like love. Third, sex is seen as primary to what we do, with the pursuit of my own pleasure as foundational to my identity. And finally, there’s the screen, which serves to attract our undivided attention, distracting us from reality and thereby undermining our humanity. Will we allow ourselves and our children to become slaves to the machine, or followers of Jesus Christ?