Episode 3:5 - Disneyland Dad Syndrome

Disneyland Dad Syndrome is real and affects blended families every day. It is so prevalent that there is a legal definition for it. So how do you become a Disneyland Dad? How do you deal with a Disneyland Dad? Darren & Paige give their insight into this problem in Blended Families.

What is a Disneyland Dad

• Legal Definition
• Only having fun when you are with the kids
• No rules, responsibilities, or discipline
• Indulging in gifts.

Why you become a Disneyland Dad

• Intentional - deliberately overindulges the kids to undermine the other parent.
• Un-intentional - Trying to have fun with his kids with limited time that they have with the kids.
• "Visitation" - is a term that makes it seem like your kids are just visiting and therefore you want to use the very limited time doing fun things not school work or chores. etc...
• Frequency of seeing the kids play a big part.
• When we see the kids - Weekends and Evenings. Most families have fun on the weekends. Stay up late, excursions etc..
• How to avoid being a Disneyland Dad
• The parents do not have the same schedules or circumstances. School with homework, weekends only. etc..
• Be consistent
• Be involved
• Encourage responsibility
• Teach them
• Consistently discipline. - Mom's rules don't matter at Dad's house. Not good.

Dealing with a Disneyland Dad

• Connect with your kids - The quality time is more important
• Focus on your own relationship with your children. - You cannot control what the other parent does.
• Let it go!! - Don't get stuck in frustration and anger.
• This is not a competition. Children are not consumer whose love is bought by stuff or entertainment
• If you compete you lose. 
• Being Present. Tune in. 
• Don't say negative things about your co-parent.
• Have fun and play. Does not need to cost money.
• Have confidence in your parenting. don't compare yourself to the co-parent.

Lemonade Moment of the Week

The pinhole leak turned out to be a nail that slowly leaked.