We Hate Movies

This is just a ten-ish-minute clip from our super-sized episode on THE DEPARTED! To access the full show, click through here to sign up now!“Martin Sheen pops like a grape!” - Andrew on Captain Queenan’s demiseOn this month’s We ❤️ Movies, Remake-ril is in full effect as we chat about Martin Scorsese’s Oscar-winning remake, The Departed! A reimagining of Andrew Lau Wai-Keung & Alan Mak’s Infernal Affairs, this is the flick that finally won Scorsese his first (and only) Oscar for directing. How majestic are all these wild-ass accents flying around this movie? Is this Marty’s most grim look at the mob? How great is this Damon/Farmiga elevator meet cute? Isn’t it great looking back at all this quaint cell phone technology? And how lucky are we to have gotten one last amazing Nicholson psycho performance? PLUS: If Yondu from Guardians of the Galaxy shows up at your apartment wearing paper booties, look out!The Departed stars Leonardo DiCaprio, Matt Damon, Mark Wahlberg, Martin Sheen, Ray Winstone, Vera Farmiga, Anthony Anderson, Alec Baldwin, Kevin Corrigan, James Badge Dale, and Jack Nicholson as Frank Costello; directed by Martin Scorsese.Be sure to visit the WHM Merch shop over on Dashery and check out all the latest show-related designs you can slap on t-shirts, hats, coffee mugs, stickers, whatever! Make your friends jealous by flaunting some WHM merch today!Original cover art by Felipe Sobreiro.

“Just tell me there’s an alien ship that’s putting time juice in them…” - EricOn this week’s episode, the 2026 Listener Request Month comes to a close with a chat about the Andrew Niccol sci-fi head-scratcher, In Time! Would this make more sense if they were robots? How about vampires? Should this just have been a vampire movie? Why is everyone in this movie driving a classic car? Should this film have just followed Cillian Murphy’s character around? Is Timberlake an action lead? And what in the world is going on with all the Time Arm Wrestling? PLUS: The time detectives raid the house of the old lady from The Fugitive!In Time stars Justin Timberlake, Amanda Seyfried, Olivia Wilde, Shiloh Oostwald, Johnny Galecki, Ray Santiago, Matt Bomer, Zuleyka Silver, Laura Ashley Samuels, Alex Pettyfer, and Cillian Murphy as Raymond Leon; directed by Andrew Niccol.Be sure to visit the WHM Merch shop over on Dashery and check out all the latest show-related designs you can slap on t-shirts, hats, coffee mugs, stickers, whatever! Make your friends jealous by flaunting some WHM merch today! Original cover art by Felipe Sobreiro.

“Always love a scroll…” - Steve on the film’s opening textOn this week’s episode, Listener Request Month takes us to Direct-to-DVD-Sequel Land as we’re tasked with watching and chatting about a horror sequel absolutely no one was asking for, White Noise 2: The Light! With Firefly’s Nathan Fillion and Battlestar Galactica’s Katie Sackhoff leading this cast, is this movie like the SyFy Channel prom, where all your science fiction adventurers are getting together? How in the world does Dennis’s Diner stay in business after this opening incident? How hilarious is that Looney Tunes piano death? And are there really that many near-death experiences (NDEs) per day in this country? PLUS: A brief history of the Direct-to-DVD sequel craze of the aughts!White Noise 2: The Light stars Nathan Fillion, Katie Sackhoff, Adrian Holmes, Kendall Cross, Teryl Rothery, William MacDonald, Josh Ballard, and Craig Fairbrass as Henry Caine; directed by Patrick Lussier.Be sure to visit the WHM Merch shop over on Dashery and check out all the latest show-related designs you can slap on t-shirts, hats, coffee mugs, stickers, whatever! Make your friends jealous by flaunting some WHM merch today! Original cover art by Felipe Sobreiro.

“Rusty Nail is clearly a fan of Looney Tunes” - SteveOn a very special We ❤️ Movies, the gang welcomes Matt Bettinelli-Olpin and Tyler Gillett from Radio Silence to chat about the great John Dahl highway thriller, Joy Ride!How awesome is all the neon lighting in this movie? How great is the cast here, including a never-better Paul Walker? Can we find a theater to book-in a short series on “motel movies”? How great is it to have so many killer car stunts in this? And remember when we could have eerie, ambiguous movie endings without assuming they were just cash-grab sequel setups? PLUS: Be sure to catch Matt & Tyler’s latest film, the super-fun, super-bloody Ready or Not 2: Here I Come, which is a must-see in theaters, y’all! Out everywhere wide on Friday, with early shows starting Thursday night.Joy Ride stars Steve Zahn, Paul Walker, Leelee Sobieski, Jessica Bowman, and the great Ted Levine as the voice of Rusty Nail; directed by John Dahl.This is a very special W❤️M we wanted to release on the main feed. You can snag commercial-free episodes of WHM, W❤️M and more over on our Patreon. Click through here to sign up now!Be sure to catch us on the road in Minneapolis on 3/20 and Chicago on 3/22 where we’ll be talking Conan the Barbarian and Big respectively. Tickets on sale now! Visit the WHM Merch shop over on Dashery and check out all the latest show-related designs you can slap on t-shirts, hats, coffee mugs, stickers, whatever! Make your friends jealous by flaunting some WHM merch today! Original cover art by Felipe Sobreiro.

“It is an obnoxious way to tell a story…” - Andrew on the film's structureOn this week’s show, Listener Request Month 2026 makes the chicken come home to roost as we are finally forced to chat about Troy Duffy’s 1999 dorm-room-poster-movie, The Boondock Saints!Why in the world did they think this ‘re-cap the crime’ format needed to happen? Why is Rocco’s character name just the real actor’s actual name? Where do they get this super-human strength to rip toilets out of floors and jump off five-story buildings with ease? And what’s with Troy Duffy’s hatred of the Mafia? PLUS: If you get bit by a Muppet, will you turn into one by the next full moon? The Boondock Saints stars Sean Patrick Flanery, Norman Reedus, David Della Rocco, Billy Connolly, Gerard Parkes, Carlo Rota, Ron Jeremy, and Willem Dafoe as Paul Smecker; directed by Troy Duffy.This episode is sponsored by Rocket Money! Let Rocket Money help you reach your financial goals faster. Join at RocketMoney dot com slash WHM! That’s RocketMoney dot com slash WHM.Be sure to catch us on the road in Minneapolis on 3/20 and Chicago on 3/22 where we’ll be talking Conan the Barbarian and Big respectively. Tickets on sale now! Be sure to visit the WHM Merch shop over on Dashery and check out all the latest show-related designs you can slap on t-shirts, hats, coffee mugs, stickers, whatever! Make your friends jealous by flaunting some WHM merch today! Original cover art by Felipe Sobreiro.

On this edition of WHM Mail Bag, we're reading some wild letters from listeners: a fella who had a co-worker that remained on the line when he went to the bathroom, someone who had one helluva time traveling cross-country with their cat, a group of friends who drank an improbable amount of malt liquor in one weekend resulting in the letter-writer throwing up on The El, and another booze-filled nightmare that ended with a guy unknowingly shaking his shit at a cop!Have a weird/embarrassing/gross story you want read on the air? Is there a years-long movie-related feud in your family that you need quashed? Are you in desperate need of relationship advice, and you've tried literally everywhere else? Then write in to the WHM Mail Bag: [email protected]! Be sure to catch us on the road in Minneapolis on 3/20 and Chicago on 3/22 where we’ll be talking Conan the Barbarian and Big respectively. Tickets on sale now! Be sure to visit the WHM Merch shop over on Dashery and check out all the latest show-related designs you can slap on t-shirts, hats, coffee mugs, stickers, whatever! Make your friends jealous by flaunting some WHM merch today! Original cover art by Felipe Sobreiro.

“It was only a matter of time before we drew this out of a hat…” - Andrew On this week’s episode, Listener Request Month heads to deep space as we talk about the legendary sci-fi failure, Supernova! How many Academy Award-nominees does it take to fix a big-budget nightmare? Is this the horniest studio science fiction film? Is Robert Forster’s character getting a doctorate in cartoon studies? Despite it all, these are some pretty good ship and space effects. What's that orb's deal, really? And how many studio executives can you cram into one on-set writing trailer? PLUS: The return of the VHS Trailer Game!Supernova stars James Spader, Angela Bassett, Robert Forster, Lou Diamond Phillips, Peter Facinelli, Robin Tunney, Wilson Cruz, and Vanessa Marshall as the voice of Sweetie; directed by “Thomas Lee.”This episode is sponsored in part by Pestie! Bugs hate to see you coming with Pestie. Go to https://pestie.com/WHM for 10% off your order.And also by GhostBed! Right now, as a WHM listener, you can take an extra 10% off your order. Just go to ghostbed.com/whm and use promo code WHM at checkout. That’s ghostbed.com/whm, code WHM, for an extra 10% off site-wide.Be sure to catch us on the road in Minneapolis on 3/20 and Chicago on 3/22 where we’ll be talking Conan the Barbarian and Big respectively. Tickets on sale now! Be sure to visit the WHM Merch shop over on Dashery and check out all the latest show-related designs you can slap on t-shirts, hats, coffee mugs, stickers, whatever! Make your friends jealous by flaunting some WHM merch today! Original cover art by Felipe Sobreiro.

This is an extended preview of our W❤️M episode on "Clerks" -- to access the full show, click through here and sign up now!“It’s kind of a dirty movie…I was trying to imagine Travis Bickle taking a date to this” - EricOn this month’s patron-requested We ❤️ Movies, we’re chatting about a real foundational flick for the four of us, Kevin Smith’s Clerks! How many VHS tapes did Chris Cabin’s house go through with this movie? How uncomfortable is it to say “View Askew-niverse” out loud? How hysterical is that funeral parlor cut? Could we bring Clerks to Broadway as a musical? And was the age of 11 too young for Steve to have seen this movie for the first time? PLUS: Michael Caine explains snowballing! This is an extended preview of our W❤️M episode on "Clerks" -- to access the full show, click through here and sign up now!Clerks stars Brian O’Halloran, Jeff Anderson, Marilyn Ghigliotti, Lisa Spoonauer, Jason Mewes, Scott Mosier, and Kevin Smith as Silent Bob; directed by Kevin Smith.Grab your tickets now for our shows in Minneapolis on 3/20 and Chicago on 3/22—don’t wait, snag those tix now!Original cover art by Felipe Sobreiro.This is an extended preview of our W❤️M episode on "Clerks" -- to access the full show, click through here and sign up now!

“These Country Bears… they busted through that ceiling!” - ChrisOn this week’s episode, we’re kicking off Listener Request Month 2026 with a banger convo about the totally insane Disney animatronic nightmare film, The Country Bears! Why couldn’t these bears have some different personalities from one another? Did Beary’s parents just steal a bear cub from the woods? Was Willie Nelson paid in weed? Why couldn’t we get more Stephen Tobolowsky in this movie? And how many of these bears are hooked on honey? PLUS: Rest in Peace, Country Bears’ original drummer, Toots! The Country Bears stars Christopher Walken, Stephen Tobolowsky, Daryl Mitchell, Diedrich Bader, M.C. Gainey, Alex Rocco, Queen Latifah, and the voices of Diedrich Bader, Haley Joel Osment, Candy Ford, James Gannon, Toby Huss, Kevin Michael Richardson, Stephen Root and Brad Garrett as Fred Bedderhead; directed by Peter Hastings.This episode is brought to you by GameTime! Download the GameTime app today! Create an account and use code WHM for $20 off your first purchase! Terms apply. Download the GameTime app today!Folks planning on attending our show at the Varsity Theatre in Minneapolis, get hip to the start of this episode where we tell y’all about an extra night you can hang out with us at a screening of An American Werewolf in London that we’re co-hosting with the Minnesota Timberwolves organization! Remember, all details are at the start of this episode! Be sure to catch us on the road in Minneapolis on 3/20 and Chicago on 3/22 where we’ll be talking Conan the Barbarian and Big respectively. Tickets on sale now! Be sure to visit the WHM Merch shop over on Dashery and check out all the latest show-related designs you can slap on t-shirts, hats, coffee mugs, stickers, whatever! Make your friends jealous by flaunting some WHM merch today! Original cover art by Felipe Sobreiro.

“This is such a choppy edit, thanks for nothing, Steven Seagal!” - AndrewOn this week’s show, we’re bringing “White Guy Karate” Month to a close with a banger conversation on the outrageous Steven Seagal film, Out for Justice!How hilarious is Seagal’s Brooklyn accent? What is this outfit he’s wearing at the start of the picture? Was Seagal dubbed for the Italian dialogue? Were John Leguizamo’s scenes deleted? And should Gino have left that dog in the car the whole film? PLUS: Visit the all-new fast food sensation, Fuck Burger!Out for Justice stars Steven Seagal, William Forsyth, Jerry Orbach, Jo Champa, Shareen Mitchell, Gina Gershon, Julianna Margulies, John Leguizamo, Raymond Cruz, and Dominic Chianese as Mr. Madano; directed by John Flynn.Don’t miss us on the road this winter when we’re in Minneapolis on March 20, and Chicago on March 22! Tickets are on sale now and you’re not gonna wanna miss us, gang! Click through here and snag your tix now!Be sure to visit the WHM Merch shop over on Dashery and check out all the latest show-related designs you can slap on t-shirts, hats, coffee mugs, stickers, whatever! Make your friends jealous by flaunting some WHM merch today!Original cover art by Felipe Sobreiro.

“You can’t feed a replicant chocolate, dude, right to the hospital!” - SteveOn this week’s episode, “White Guy Karate” Month goes sci-fi as we talk about the totally insane JCVD/Michael Rooker action joint, Replicant! How unsettling is JCVD with non-mullet long hair? How does this psychic link work with these fellas? How much of this movie takes place in that one hospital? Is Michael Rooker’s character helping raise his partner’s child? Is it his kid? Why does that lady have a pool table in her baby’s bedroom? And is there anything more terrifying than JCVD singing “Rock-a-Bye Baby”? PLUS: Coming to Broadway next season: Replicant The Musical!Replicant stars Jean-Claude Van Damme, Catherine Dent, Brandon James Olson, Pam Hyatt, Ian Robison, Allan Gray, and James Hutson as Snotty Concierge; directed by Ringo Lam.This episode is sponsored in part by Rocket Money! Let Rocket Money help you reach your financial goals faster. Join at RocketMoney dot com slash WHM! That’s RocketMoney dot com slash WHM.And also by GhostBed! Right now, as a We Hate Movies listener, you can take an extra 10% off your order. Just go to ghostbed.com/whm and use promo code WHM at checkout. That’s ghostbed.com/whm, code WHM, for an extra 10% off site-wide.Don’t miss us on the road this winter when we’re in Los Angeles on February 22, Minneapolis on March 20, and Chicago on March 22! Tickets are on sale now and you’re not gonna wanna miss us, gang! Click through here and snag your tix now! Be sure to visit the WHM Merch shop over on Dashery and check out all the latest show-related designs you can slap on t-shirts, hats, coffee mugs, stickers, whatever! Make your friends jealous by flaunting some WHM merch today! Original cover art by Felipe Sobreiro.

On the latest WHM Mail Bag, we’re reading some wild-ass letters from listeners about an ash-scattering debacle, blacking out at a Myrtle Beach road house, assisting a dubious martial arts figure at the video store, and multiple movie theater bathroom disasters!Don’t miss us on the road this winter when we’re in Los Angeles on February 22, Minneapolis on March 20, and Chicago on March 22! Tickets are on sale now and you’re not gonna wanna miss us, gang! Click through here and snag your tix now! Be sure to visit the WHM Merch shop over on Dashery and check out all the latest show-related designs you can slap on t-shirts, hats, coffee mugs, stickers, whatever! Make your friends jealous by flaunting some WHM merch today! Want your read stories read on the air? Need the guys to settle a years-old family squabble? Lackluster relationship device? Write into the Mail Bag: [email protected]! Original cover art by Felipe Sobreiro.

On this week's On-Screen Live, we were chatting about some current TV we're watching including Wonder Man, Starfleet Academy, A Knight of the Seven Kingdoms & more! We were also reacting to a couple trailers, including the surprise teaser for The Adventures of Cliff Booth that dropped Sunday night, and, of course, talking about some big (read: humiliating) commercial moments from The Big Game!Grab your tickets now for the first leg of the 2026 tour! We’ll be in Los Angeles on 2/22, Minneapolis on 3/20 and Chicago on 3/22—don’t wait, snag those tix now!On-Screen Live will return in March!Original cover art by Felipe Sobreiro.