Episode 106: How To Avoid "Amygdala Hijack" In High Stress Situations
The Private School Leader Podcast
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Show Notes
We have all been there. We’ve all had moments where stress seems to take over and we react in ways we regret later.
It might be raising your voice at a teacher or student. It might be overreacting during an argument with a loved one.
Later, we usually have regrets and we ask ourselves, “WHY DID I DO THAT?” This is often due to something called an amygdala hijack, a term coined by psychologist Daniel Goleman in his book Emotional Intelligence.
We have stressful jobs. The stakes are high. So many people are watching us and we are setting the example for what great leadership looks like. We cannot afford to let our amygdala hijack our brain and then just “hope for the best”.
On today’s episode of The Private School Leader Podcast, we are going to talk about How To Avoid "Amygdala Hijack" In High Stress Situations.
I would LOVE to hear from you! Please just reply to this email and tell me the number one strategy that you have learned listening to the podcast and your number one pain point so far this year. Thanks for listening and I can’t wait to hear from you!
I know that you are super busy, so be sure to listen while you are doing something else. I hope that you will get value from this episode as you serve and lead your school community. Thank you for taking some time out of your day to listen to the podcast!
Thanks for making a difference,
Mark Minkus
Being a private school leader is a VERY difficult job. You have to make hundreds of decisions every day, and you have to keep everyone safe, increase enrollment, keep the parents happy, keep the board happy, motivate the teachers, deal with student discipline, beat last year’s test scores and come in under budget.
That can lead to you feeling tired, discouraged and stressed out. I’ve been there. That’s why I created THRIVE Academy just for you. THRIVE Academy is a digital course that will help you get out of survival mode and get back to feeling energized at school. To learn more, go to www.theprivateschoolleader.com/thrive
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I help my clients overcome imposter syndrome, set boundaries between work and home and how to actually get important things done instead of having your day ruled by the tyranny of the urgent. Sounds impossible right? It’s not. I can teach you how to make it possible.
I would love to be your coach and I have a few spots open. Go to www.theprivateschoolleader.com/coaching to learn more about working with me 1-on-1.
I am excited to share with you a new resource and I want to give this to you as a FREE GIFT to say “thank you” for listening to the podcast. It is called The 7 Secrets To Improving Teacher Morale. As private school leaders, we are always looking for ways to improve teacher morale at our schools, but it is hard to know where to start. Well, now you have a step by step plan and you can grab it at theprivateschoolleader.com/morale
I want to give you a FREE gift called 7 Strategies To Effectively Deal With Difficult Teachers. Sometimes we need some courage and confidence to deal with difficult teachers. What you need is a plan! This guide is a step by step plan that you can use to help one of your difficult teachers improve their performance and improve their attitude. Go to theprivateschoolleader.com/difficult to grab this free guide!
I want to say thank you for listening to the podcast by giving you a FREE GIFT. It is called The 7 Steps To Having A Successful Meeting With An Upset Parent. This guide is an 11 page pdf that gives you a step by step plan to have better meetings with the parents at your school. Every good coach has a game plan. Every good teacher has a lesson plan. Too many private school leaders don’t have a plan when they sit down to meet with an upset parent. Well, now you have a PLAN! You can grab this FREE GUIDE at www.theprivateschoolleader.com/meeting
I’ve created a free resource for you called “The 6 Things That Every Private School Teacher Wants From Their Leader”. This guide is a 6 page pdf that will be a game changer for you. I guarantee you that if you do these 6 things, the teachers at your school will be happy to follow you. You can pick up your free guide by going to www.theprivateschoolleader.com/guide
I want to give you a gift to say “thank you” for listening to the podcast. I have created a FREE guide for you called “5 Strategies To Help You Work With Difficult Parents”. We know that working with parents is part of the job and most of our parents are great, but some of them can be very demanding and emotional and difficult. This guide will give you the tools that you need to build better relationships and have better meetings with the difficult parents at your school. Go to www.theprivateschoolleader.com/parents to grab the guide. Thank you again for listening every week!
I am excited to share a brand new resource with you. It is a 9 page pdf called: “How To Use Verbal Judo To Have Better Conversations With The Parents At Your School” What is “Verbal Judo”? "Verbal Judo" is a communication strategy that focuses on using words effectively to de-escalate conflict, resolve disputes, and achieve positive outcomes in various interpersonal interactions, particularly in high-pressure situations.
George Thompson and Jerry Jenkins wrote a book called Verbal Judo: The Gentle Art Of Persuasion. So, I have taken several important strategies from the book and applied them to your life as a private school leader. Grab your free copy of “How To Use Verbal Judo To Have Better Conversations With The Parents At Your School” at www.theprivateschoolleader.com/judo
Please check out all of the free resources on my website that can help you serve and lead your school community. There are "Plug & Play PD's" (45 minute webinars with guided notes) as well as Top 10 Lists of Leadership Books, Productivity Books and TED Talks over at www.theprivateschoolleader.com/resources. You can grab the show notes for today's episode at www.theprivateschoolleader.com/episode105
Please write a review of this podcast and help the algorithm push this content out to more leaders. I would love to get your feedback about the podcast, ideas for future episodes and hear about how you are implementing these strategies in your life and at your school. You can email me at [email protected] Thanks!!
I’ve created a FREE RESOURCE for you called “The Top 6 Ways To Protect Your School From a Lawsuit”. This is a 10 page pdf that will help you to keep your staff and students safe and help keep your school out of court. Litigation is expensive, time consuming and extremely stressful. This common sense guide will help you to be more intentional and proactive when it comes to protecting your school. You can grab “The Top 6 Ways To Protect Your School From a Lawsuit” at www.theprivateschoolleader.com/lawsuit. Thanks!
TRANSCRIPT:
Welcome to the private school Leader podcast, where private school leaders learn how to thrive and not just survive as they serve and lead their schools. I strongly believe that it is possible to have a long and happy and fulfilling career as a private school leader. And my passion is to help you figure out exactly how to do just that right here on the private school leader podcast. And I'm your host, Mark Minkus. • • • So, we've all been there, • • • • and • • we have all had moments • • where stress seems to just take over, • • and we just react in ways that we regret later. • • • And you might be thinking of a situation right now, and it might be that you raised your voice at a teacher • • or at a student or a board member in a meeting. • • • It might be that you or I overreacted during a conversation, argument with someone that we care about. • • • And then later, we usually have regrets, and we're like, why did I do that? • • Well, • • • the answer is very often • • due to something called • • amygdala hijack. • • And that's a term coined by psychologist Daniel Goleman in his excellent book emotional intelligence. • • • And so we have stressful jobs as private school leaders. The stakes are high, • • and we can't afford to let our, uh, amygdalas hijack our brains and then just hope for the best and hope we can apologize later. • • • • And so on today's episode of the private school Leader podcast, we are going to talk about how to avoid amygdala hijack in high stress situations. • • •
I've created a free resource on improving teacher morale for you
And before we jump into that, I just want to tell you about a new and free resource that I've created for you. I'm pretty excited about it. It's called the seven secrets to improving teacher morale. • And I talk to a lot of leaders. Um, I coach a lot of leaders, and teacher morale is a big challenge at a lot of our schools. And • • I think you need a plan, and this is a plan for you, a step by step guide that you can grab it. It's [email protected]. morale. It's called the seven secrets to improving teacher morale. It's a starting point. It's going to be hard work, but it will work, and I hope that you will get that, and I hope that you, • um, will use it.
Seven secrets to improving teacher morale over theprivateschoolleader. com
And again, just a free gift saying, thank you for listening to the podcast seven secrets to improving teacher morale [email protected] • • morale. • • And then, • • you know, I just want to remind you that • • • I can help you, um, solve a problem. • • And it might be through thrive academy, the online course that you can find [email protected] thrive. • • And that course can m change the way that you lead. It can help you go from being in survival mode to thriving • • and to do that asynchronous work at a time that works for you. But also we have office hours where we have other leaders from all over • north, um, • America showing up, supporting each other, rooting each other on. • • And so theprivateschoolleader.com thrive is where you can find out more about that. And I can also help you • • solve your biggest problem at the school, or at least I can try to help you. I want to hear more about it. • • Um, I have one coaching spot open, • • and, um, that will probably&n