DARVO: The Manipulation Tactic That Makes You Defend Yourself
The Positivity Xperience · Lori Wheeler / The Positivity Xperience
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Show Notes
Have you ever brought up an issue with someone and somehow ended up defending yourself instead? In this episode we break down the psychological tactic known as DARVO — Deny, Attack, Reverse Victim and Offender.
This manipulation pattern is often used to escape accountability, distort conflict, and regain narrative control. We explore the science behind DARVO, why it works so effectively on empathetic people, and how it shows up in relationships, workplaces, and family dynamics. We also discuss how to recognize this pattern in others — and how to catch it in yourself before it damages trust.
🎧 In this episode we cover:
*What DARVO actually is
*The psychology behind denial and blame reversal
*Why your nervous system gets hijacked during conflict
*Real-life examples of DARVO in relationships and families
*How to stay grounded when someone tries to flip the narrative
*How to recognize when you might be using DARVO yourself
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