The Oldest Profession Podcast

Infamous misandrist martyr and queer icon Aileen Wuornos killed seven men while working as a hitch hiking sex worker in Florida. To say that her life was defined by hardship would be an understatement. She started exchanging sex for resources at 11, was kicked out of her family house at 15. At 35, after killing a number of johns, one of whom a convicted rapist Wuornos shot in self-defence, she was betrayed by her lover who collaborated with the cops in exchange for immunity from prosecution. Her trial was heavily covered by the media, who feasted on her case because of what they perceived as Wuornos' titillating identity as both a queer sex worker and a survivor of sexual assault. Her last words one camera were: "Thanks a lot, society, for railroading my ass." After spending years on death row, she was executed at the age of 56.

In this new special segment, Kaytlin responds to the alarming but predictable trend of single women traveling alone being targeted by companies who are spending millions to train their staff to spot 'trafficking victims'. Surprise surprise: the training doesn't actually help trafficking victims, but rather targets old pros. Kaytlin also addresses the recent wave of arrests on seeking.com.

This week we're doing something a little different- we compiled heartbreaking and heartwarming coming out stories from Coyote Fawn, Allie Oops, and many more.

To commemorate the International Day to End Violence Against Sex Workers on December 17th we pass the mic to Ceyenne Doroshow who interviews long time friend & activist JyAsia Kylee about her experience with violence & the police. For more information about vigils & events in your area visit http://www.december17.org/

In this episode Kaytlin focuses on the life of unlikely national hero, Stormy Daniels. The uneventful sex she definitely had with Donald Trump might be the least interesting part of this incredible woman's story.

In the second part of this two part series about prostitution in colonial Nigeria, Kaytlin pulls back to discuss the shared goals and developing rivalry between the Colony Welfare Office, which was run by British colonialists, and upper class Lagosian women working toward a broad feminist agenda. Beginning in the 1920's, these women demanded that the colonial state work to eradicate prostitution. However, when the government passed and aggressively enforced anti-prostitution laws in the 1940s, the legislation impacted their lives in ways that they could not have predicted.

Segilola Eleyinju Ege was an immensely popular Nigerian prostitute who wrote what is considered by many to be the first Yoruba novel,"The Life History of Me Segilola Endowed with Fascinating Eyes, the Sweetheart of a Thousand and One Men". Between 1929 & 1930, Segilola published tales from her exciting life as a monthly column in the Lagos Herald. This is part one of a two part series based on Saheed Aderinto's scholarly book, "When Sex Threatened The State; Illicit Sexuality, Nationalism, and Politics in Colonial Nigeria 1900-1958".

Six years before writing and starring in Rocky, Sylvester Stallone was the lead in a soft core porn film originally titled 'Party at Kitty and Stud's', which was re-released and renamed 'The Italian Stallion' after Stallone became famous.

Bettie Page, one of the most iconic pin-ups and bondage models of the twentieth century, had an on-and-off again relationship with evangelical christianity. While her involvement with the church led her to become 'reformed', she never repented her nude modeling days, believing that that since Adam and Eve were created naked in the Garden of Eden, then God probably didn't have too much of an issue with nudity.

This week begins a series on "reformed whores," people who publicly campaigned to prevent others from entering the sex trade. Kaytlin breaks down the context that brought together two powerhouse icons of the "porn wars." Feminist intellectual Andrea Dworkin and Linda Lovelace who starred in the 1972 blockbuster success that thrust porn into the mainstream, Deep Throat.

Kaytlin talks about losing the NY12 Democratic Primary and next steps in the fight for sex worker rights. She talks about substituting "the electorate" for her parents approval and chasing numbers to feel alive. She also talks about the "end" of #SurvivorsAgainstSESTA and asks her listeners to get in this fight if they aren't already. Shout out to Survived and Punished, SWOP Behind Bars, Support (Ho)se, Democratic Socialists of America, GLITS & all the old pros who wrote letters to voters-we made a difference.

Kaytlin and "whore of all trades" and activist Tai dive into the life of bisexual legend Julie D'Aubigny, who fought, fucked & sang her way through 17th century France. An expert fencer and opera signer, D'Aubigny seduced aristocratic men and women, did some grave robbing, and burned a nunnery.

Jacq the Stripper joins Kaytlin Bailey to talk about American icon, Gypsy Rose Lee. Gypsy was born into a multi generational family of scrappy independent women. After realizing she couldn't support the family as a vaudeville performer, Lee turned to the more lucrative craft of burlesque, which she transformed with her wit and wisdom. Like Jacq, Gypsy was a brilliant stand up comic & author in addition to being an accomplished strip tease performer. And like Kaytlin, she eventually was drawn toward leftie political activism. Jacq & Kaytlin also talk stage moms, madness, and the importance of laughing at yourself first. You can find Jacq's art on her website, http://www.jacqthestripper.com/

June 2nd is International Whores Day, so fly your thong flag high and listen to Kaytlin Bailey & Ceyenne Doroshow dish on the french whores who helped inspire the sex worker rights movement. On June 2nd, 1975 over 100 sex workers occupied the Church of Saint-Nizier in Lyon, France. They hung a banner which read "Our children do not want their mother's in jail." They sparked an international conversation about sex worker rights that continues today.

Best known for attempting to shoot Andy Warhol, Valerie Solanas' SCUM manifesto became a rallying cry for a generation of feminist thinkers. Valerie was a vagrant working as a panhandler, prostitute and provocateur. From this position of presumed powerlessness Valerie sees through the thin veil of civility to call bullshit on patriarchal power. The ladies admire this old pro with nothing to lose and no fucks to give. Wendi is moving on to bigger and better things but Ceyenne Doroshow (@ceyennedoroshow) joins Kaytlin Bailey (@kaytlinbailey) in this week's episode about addiction, desperation, and radical feminism. After deconstructing their attraction to addicts both women take a deep dive into the life and work of unrepentant hustler, author and attempted murderer Valerie Solanas.

Your favorite mouthy broads Kaytlin Bailey (@kaytlinbailey) and Wendi Starling (@wendibird82) are safe, alive and BACK with a fresh new episode and, once again, are joined by the incomparably fabulous Ceyenne Doroshow (@doroshow) to unwrap the tumultuously tantalizing life of Dorian Corey. As documented in the film "Paris Is Burning", Corey was one of the queens of the NYC Ball Culture that went to the grave keeping one of her darkest secrets in the closet. The ladies also discuss setting boundaries with partners, finding the strength to leave a bad situation AND the importance of having a surplus of baking soda (or any white white powder) within reach of your bedazzled ball gowns.

French courtesan Marguerite Marie Alibert, otherwise known as Maggie Meller, was the lover of Edward the VII. After her affair with the British prince, she married a rich, snotty and young Egyptian aristocrat, whom she killed in a fancy hotel room in London. The girls talk about homeopathic vadge stuff, how murder is not okay even if the victim is a man, and hipsters who snap instead of clapping.

The ladies are once again joined by the fiercely funny Ceyenne Doroshow (@doroshow) and these 3 mouthy sound off about Stormy Daniels' latest bad bitch moves, the slippery subject of fondling foreskin AND discuss whether or not Bailey Davis (recently fired Saints cheerleader) was laboring under conditions eerily similar to trafficking. Then, Kaytlin (@kaytlinbailey) and Wendi (@wendibird82) dive into the story of Elizabeth Moryng, a 13th Century madame who serviced the religious clergy under the guise of operating an embroidery business and consider the pros and cons of fucking while wearing all of your clothes. Wet-wipe your crotches and hike up your granny panties because this episode is bound to get you hot and bothered… mostly bothered because of the harm FOSTA/SESTA is doing to SWs and the feminist movement in general but who knows, maybe this time around we'll pull together and change the course of history Support the show on Patreon *** Brought to you by Velvet Swing. Velvet swing is a cannabis-enhanced lubricant known to enhance pleasure. THC dilates the smallest capillaries, which increases blood flow, heightens sensitivity, and can lead to longer, stronger orgasms. The product was meticulously researched by sexual icon Mistress Matisse and delivers a unique levels of sexual satisfaction for men, women & couples. *** EMAIL US: @ [email protected] Twitter: @oldpropodcast Instagram: @oldpropodcast Support the show on Patreon FOLLOW KAYTLIN Twitter: @kaytlinbailey Instagram: @kaytlinbailey FOLLOW WENDI Twitter: @wendistarling Instagram: @wendibird82 *** Produced by Mary Kelly Funky One Kevin MacLeod (incompetech.com) Licensed under Creative Commons: By Attribution 3.0 License http://creativecommons.org/licenses/by/3.0/

It's a gabfest to the max this week when Kaytlin (@kaytlinbailey) and Wendi (@wendibird82) are joined by founder of the SOAR Institute, Melissa Sontag Broudo! They talk a little shop and retrace the bold steps that brought Melissa to a fateful meeting with life-long trans sex worker activist Sharmus Outlaw and exactly how Sharmus' legacy lives on through the tireless harm reduction and outreach efforts of the people who loved and were inspired by her vibrant spirit. Support the show on Patreon SEE US LIVE!! **NYC** Wednesday, April 18th 8pm Soho Playhouse 15 Vandam St *** $8 online/ $10 at the door *** Buy your tickets here *** Portion of the proceeds benefit SOAR Institute *** Brought to you by Velvet Swing. Velvet swing is a cannabis-enhanced lubricant known to enhance pleasure. THC dilates the smallest capillaries, which increases blood flow, heightens sensitivity, and can lead to longer, stronger orgasms. The product was meticulously researched by sexual icon Mistress Matisse and delivers a unique levels of sexual satisfaction for men, women & couples. *** EMAIL US: @ [email protected] Twitter: @oldpropodcast Instagram: @oldpropodcast Support the show on Patreon FOLLOW KAYTLIN Twitter: @kaytlinbailey Instagram: @kaytlinbailey FOLLOW WENDI Twitter: @wendistarling Instagram: @wendibird82 *** Produced by Mary Kelly Funky One Kevin MacLeod (incompetech.com) Licensed under Creative Commons: By Attribution 3.0 License http://creativecommons.org/licenses/by/3.0/

History almost always repeats itself, and we are currently witnessing and living through another major attack on the livelihood of sex workers by way of the FOSTA/SESTA bill. Kaytlin (@kaytlinbailey) and Wendi (@wendibird82) kick off the episode with updates on which companies have started cracking down in compliance with the impending law, then jump into the details of Timarchus, a male sex worker in his youth that was later shunned and outcast by his fellow politicians. PLUS, learn about all the fun, flirty ways the government and other giant corporations can infiltrate things like your Google Docs, email accounts and possibly more communication tools that we haven't even thought about yet! Support the show on Patreon *** EMAIL US: @ [email protected] Twitter: @oldpropodcast Instagram: @oldpropodcast Support the show on Patreon FOLLOW KAYTLIN Twitter: @kaytlinbailey Instagram: @kaytlinbailey FOLLOW WENDI Twitter: @wendistarling Instagram: @wendibird82 *** Produced by Mary Kelly Funky One Kevin MacLeod (incompetech.com) Licensed under Creative Commons: By Attribution 3.0 License http://creativecommons.org/licenses/by/3.0/

The whores are back with the fantastically feisty Ceyenne Doroshow (@doroshow) in Part II of their snow day extravaganza. Kaytlin (@kaytlinbailey) and Wendi (@wendibird82) respond to a listener email and remind us that racists can be sex workers too, then get down to business by singing the praises of trailblazing trans woman Miss Major. After being misgendered and housed with male inmates, she became one of the key negotiators in the Attica Prison Riots in 1971 and went on to work as an advocate for trans women's rights within the prison system. Miss Major also participated in the Stonewall Riots and eventually founded the Gigi House, an organization dedicated to preserving and celebrating the stories of trans people throughout history. The ladies also have a very real discussion about the class divisions within the sex worker community, the perversion of historical narratives of trans people AND address the issue of cat murder parks in Peru. ALSO, how can notable trans people better support their community? Who in hell was the stylist for the Kaitlin Jenner shoot?? PLUS tips on which shades to avoid at the tanning salon. GLITS Inc. Follow GLITS on twitter Support the show on Patreon *** Email the show: @ [email protected] Twitter: @oldpropodcast Instagram: @oldpropodcast Support the show on Patreon FOLLOW KAYTLIN Twitter: @kaytlinbailey Instagram: @kaytlinbailey FOLLOW WENDI Twitter: @wendistarling Instagram: @wendibird82 *** Produced by Mary Kelly Funky One Kevin MacLeod (incompetech.com) Licensed under Creative Commons: By Attribution 3.0 License http://creativecommons.org/licenses/by/3.0/

This week, the ladies are trapped indoors due to a snowstorm with a fabulously special guest, fellow old pro and founder of GLITS (Gays and Lesbians Living in a Transgender Society), Ms. Ceyenne Doroshow! Ceyenne recounts her experiences with the legendary Flawless Sabrina. Born in 1939, Flawless (given name: Jack Doroshow) became the queen of drag and originator of the ultra glamorous Ballroom scene. In between mothering and mentoring countless young trans women, she also penned 2 beloved disco songs AND thrived as an inspirational beacon of light and love despite being arrested over 100 times for merely dressing outside of her gender. PLUS, Ceyenne (@doroshow) also shares her deeply emotional self-realization story, Kaytlin (@kaytlinbailey) gets of during her latest updates on the Stormy Daniels story and Wendi (@wendibird82) has turned to banging anyone that folds towels for a living in an effort to extended those sweet vacation vibes. For more information on Flawless Sabrina GLITS Inc. Follow GLITS on twitter Support the show on Patreon *** Brought to you by Velvet Swing. Velvet swing is a cannabis-enhanced lubricant known to enhance pleasure. THC dilates the smallest capillaries, which increases blood flow, heightens sensitivity, and can lead to longer, stronger orgasms. The product was meticulously researched by sexual icon Mistress Matisse and delivers a unique levels of sexual satisfaction for men, women & couples. *** EMAIL US: @ [email protected] Twitter: @oldpropodcast Instagram: @oldpropodcast Support the show on Patreon FOLLOW KAYTLIN Twitter: @kaytlinbailey Instagram: @kaytlinbailey FOLLOW WENDI Twitter: @wendistarling Instagram: @wendibird82 *** Produced by Mary Kelly Funky One Kevin MacLeod (incompetech.com) Licensed under Creative Commons: By Attribution 3.0 License http://creativecommons.org/licenses/by/3.0/

Prepare to be inspired by the life and barrier shattering work of Georgina Beyer. This bad bitch went from survival sex worker to radio host and ultimately took her place as the first trans politician in New Zealand (Mayor of Carterton and Wairarapa MP). PLUS, the ladies break down the difference between legalization and decriminalization, read a listener email AND this episode just might make you consider giving massages to the neighborhood moms. With nonsense like the SESTA bill being lauded in the United States, Kaytlin (@kaytlinbailey) and Wendi (@wendibird82) do their best to rally the troops of whores to get their sweet asses in the race for political office and get our voices heard! Support the show on Patreon *** EMAIL US: @ [email protected] Twitter: @oldpropodcast Instagram: @oldpropodcast FOLLOW KAYTLIN Twitter: @kaytlinbailey Instagram: @kaytlinbailey FOLLOW WENDI Twitter: @wendistarling Instagram: @wendibird82 *** Produced by Mary Kelly Funky One Kevin MacLeod (incompetech.com) Licensed under Creative Commons: By Attribution 3.0 License http://creativecommons.org/licenses/by/3.0/

This week, the ladies take a break from history lessons in an effort to highlight a present day movement to suppress and disable sex workers from willingly supporting themselves and their families by way of society's oldest profession. SESTA (Stop Enabling Sex Traffickers Act) is a bill that will, most likely, be passed by the time you hear this episode. Kaytlin and Wendi break down exactly why and how this bill is harmful to sex workers and possibly even this podcast. THEN, Kaytlin passes on the mission statement and organization goals laid out at the SASS (Seattle Annual Sex Work Symposium) and lays out specific actions you can take to help unify the sex worker front on a large and small scale. PLUS. they get get into the pros and cons of high-value gifts versus the cash equivalent of said gifts. Can Wendi survive without unlimited Uber rides? Will Kaytlin be able to thrive within the cozy honey pot her man has prepared for her?? Stop SESTA/FOSTA Call congressional offices directly or through the switchboard. If you do not have the direct number, you can reach US representatives by calling 202-225-3121, and US senators by calling 202-224-3121. Ask the operator to connect you to the individual office, or just tell them your state. "So You Want To Talk About Race" - Ijeoma Oluo Support the show on Patreon *** Email the show: @ [email protected] Twitter: @oldpropodcast Instagram: @oldpropodcast Support the show on Patreon FOLLOW KAYTLIN Twitter: @kaytlinbailey Instagram: @kaytlinbailey FOLLOW WENDI Twitter: @wendistarling Instagram: @wendibird82 *** Produced by Mary Kelly Funky One Kevin MacLeod (incompetech.com) Licensed under Creative Commons: By Attribution 3.0 License http://creativecommons.org/licenses/by/3.0/

Erotic literature tantalizes the senses in a uniquely specific way, even more so when the salacious stories are derived from real life. This week, the ladies recount the steamy and sordid tale of author Anais Nin and her many lovers. It turns into an especially raw episode as Wendi (@wendibird82) spills the specifics of a very recent unpleasant encounter with a former SD and Kaytlin (@kaytlinbailey) dives into the details of emotional AND physical clean up after dealing with an aggressively assertive client. Support the show on Patreon *** Brought to you by Velvet Swing. Velvet swing is a cannabis-enhanced lubricant known to enhance pleasure. THC dilates the smallest capillaries, which increases blood flow, heightens sensitivity, and can lead to longer, stronger orgasms. The product was meticulously researched by sexual icon Mistress Matisse and delivers a unique levels of sexual satisfaction for men, women & couples. *** EMAIL US: @ [email protected] Twitter: @oldpropodcast Instagram: @oldpropodcast Support the show on Patreon FOLLOW KAYTLIN Twitter: @kaytlinbailey Instagram: @kaytlinbailey FOLLOW WENDI Twitter: @wendistarling Instagram: @wendibird82 *** Produced by Mary Kelly Funky One Kevin MacLeod (incompetech.com) Licensed under Creative Commons: By Attribution 3.0 License http://creativecommons.org/licenses/by/3.0/

There seems to be a widely held belief that all sex workers privately hang their heads in shame the second they are out of the spotlight or off duty. While there are undoubtedly flashes of shame (as with most jobs), some people turn to sex work as a way to aggressively take control of their destiny, utilizing the platform to shine brightly and, in the case of Jenna Jameson, build a f*cking empire! Kaytlin (@kaytlinbailey) passes the teacher duties to Wendi (@wendibird82) this episode so buckle up. Besides fangirling over Jenna and her legendary rise to the top of the porn industry, the ladies also talk labia size, paying for your porn PLUS hot tips on how to find out if you're dating a potential stalker!!! Support the show on Patreon *** Brought to you by Velvet Swing. Velvet swing is a cannabis-enhanced lubricant known to enhance pleasure. THC dilates the smallest capillaries, which increases blood flow, heightens sensitivity, and can lead to longer, stronger orgasms. The product was meticulously researched by sexual icon Mistress Matisse and delivers a unique levels of sexual satisfaction for men, women & couples. *** EMAIL US: @ [email protected] Twitter: @oldpropodcast Instagram: @oldpropodcast Support the show on Patreon FOLLOW KAYTLIN Twitter: @kaytlinbailey Instagram: @kaytlinbailey FOLLOW WENDI Twitter: @wendistarling Instagram: @wendibird82 *** Produced by Mary Kelly Funky One Kevin MacLeod (incompetech.com) Licensed under Creative Commons: By Attribution 3.0 License http://creativecommons.org/licenses/by/3.0/

Love and Addiction. Guns and Whores. Turks and Caicos. Bat Heads and Garlic? This week's episode gets deep outta the gate THEN, Kaytlin (@kaytlinbailey) and Wendi (@wendibird82) dig into the story of infamous whore Mária Katalin Horony (aka Big-Nosed Kate) and her tumultuous relationship with notorious outlaw Doc Holiday. PLUS, the ladies spill their secret recipe for nabbing a luxury vacation AND dole out the details of the intense training regimen that transformed them into the emotional athletes they are today! Support the show on Patreon *** Brought to you by Velvet Swing. Velvet swing is a cannabis-enhanced lubricant known to enhance pleasure. THC dilates the smallest capillaries, which increases blood flow, heightens sensitivity, and can lead to longer, stronger orgasms. The product was meticulously researched by sexual icon Mistress Matisse and delivers a unique levels of sexual satisfaction for men, women & couples. *** EMAIL US: @ [email protected] Twitter: @oldpropodcast Instagram: @oldpropodcast Support the show on Patreon FOLLOW KAYTLIN Twitter: @kaytlinbailey Instagram: @kaytlinbailey FOLLOW WENDI Twitter: @wendistarling Instagram: @wendibird82 *** Produced by Mary Kelly Funky One Kevin MacLeod (incompetech.com) Licensed under Creative Commons: By Attribution 3.0 License http://creativecommons.org/licenses/by/3.0/

The ladies come outta the gate fired up about the treatment of chicks in entertainment (and life in general duh), then get to the task of addressing a listener's question regarding SA negotiations within the legal confines of the podcast. They detail the particulars of creating an aura of preciosity and increasing outwardly perceived value in any work environment. Wendi (@wendibird82) and Kaytlin (@kaytlinbailey) reveal exactly how their experiences working on cruise ships and as street fundraisers prepared them to successfully navigate the world of sugaring and trained them in the art of authentic inauthenticity. THEN, the girls dig into the history of Yoshiwara and the original Ho-topia, more respectfully referred to as 'The Floating City'. AND, how to teach your clients to understand and appreciate your value as a provide and put yourself in the position of the buyer by asking one simple question. PLUS, get an update on the NOLA Stippers' strike, get the inside scoop on the new facial recognition pussy and exactly how the Samurai's invented OCD. Support the show on Patreon *** EMAIL US: @ [email protected] Twitter: @oldpropodcast Instagram: @oldpropodcast Support the show on Patreon FOLLOW KAYTLIN Twitter: @kaytlinbailey Instagram: @kaytlinbailey FOLLOW WENDI Twitter: @wendistarling Instagram: @wendibird82 *** Produced by Mary Kelly Funky One Kevin MacLeod (incompetech.com) Licensed under Creative Commons: By Attribution 3.0 License http://creativecommons.org/licenses/by/3.0/

The ladies are back and fired up after battling sinus infections and side-eye from chicks at the 2018 Women's March. They also dig into a serious discussion of the difference between a shot of warm jizz to the back of the throat versus being finger fed snotty room temp cum THEN the girls dive into the history of the original "Dickipedia", Der Pranger, a German communist publication written by whores FOR whores in an attempt to establish fair treatment and laws benefiting sex workers and their patrons. Tragically, those ideals were never realized BUT, that doesn't keep Kaytlin (@kaytlinbailey) from fantasizing about a Hoetopia where she lives as baby-selling farmer and Wendi (@wendibird82) naps all day and wakes up to find envelopes of cash on the patio of their ranch. PLUS, how can sex workers avoid addiction when partying is part of the job? Why is it illegal to sell something that is legal to give away for free?? AND what the fuck is cake farting and why are we all not doing it every single day?!? SEE US LIVE!!! NYC Thursday February 15th 10pm Club Cumming 505 E 6th St New York, NY 10009 Buy Tickets *** Brought to you by Velvet Swing. Velvet swing is a cannabis-enhanced lubricant known to enhance pleasure. THC dilates the smallest capillaries, which increases blood flow, heightens sensitivity, and can lead to longer, stronger orgasms. The product was meticulously researched by sexual icon Mistress Matisse and delivers a unique levels of sexual satisfaction for men, women & couples. *** EMAIL US: @ [email protected] Twitter: @oldpropodcast Instagram: @oldpropodcast Support the show on Patreon FOLLOW KAYTLIN Twitter: @kaytlinbailey Instagram: @kaytlinbailey FOLLOW WENDI Twitter: @wendistarling Instagram: @wendibird82 *** Produced by Mary Kelly Funky One Kevin MacLeod (incompetech.com) Licensed under Creative Commons: By Attribution 3.0 License http://creativecommons.org/licenses/by/3.0/

It seems like everyday there is new public allegation or harrowing tale of sexual assault, and that has got some people (mostly men) crying "Fascism!!" and calling for the heads of so-called 'feminazis'. There are, however, a few key differences in a society that prioritizes human equality while enforcing punishments for those that commit acts of sexual violence and a full-blown fascist regime. They ladies understand this can be a confusing issue for some men, so this episode is the first in a series of sex worker stories from Nazi Germany in an effort to educate, enlighten and (hopefully) entertain everyone! But before recounting the life of brothel owner turned part time spy, Kitty Salon, Kaytlin (@kaytlinbailey) and Wendi (@wendibird82) get into an intense conversation about the Grace/Aziz incident that ultimately ends in a brilliant business idea!! *** Brought to you by Velvet Swing. Velvet swing is a cannabis-enhanced lubricant known to enhance pleasure. THC dilates the smallest capillaries, which increases blood flow, heightens sensitivity, and can lead to longer, stronger orgasms. The product was meticulously researched by sexual icon Mistress Matisse and delivers a unique levels of sexual satisfaction for men, women & couples. *** EMAIL US: @ [email protected] Twitter: @oldpropodcast Instagram: @oldpropodcast Support the show on Patreon FOLLOW KAYTLIN Twitter: @kaytlinbailey Instagram: @kaytlinbailey FOLLOW WENDI Twitter: @wendistarling Instagram: @wendibird82 *** Produced by Mary Kelly Funky One Kevin MacLeod (incompetech.com) Licensed under Creative Commons: By Attribution 3.0 License http://creativecommons.org/licenses/by/3.0/

Sex workers are some of the baddest bitches around and in the 1950s, the US government took full advantage of that by forcefully enlisting handfuls of whores to aid them in administering LSD tests on their unsuspecting clients. Kaytlin (@kaytlinbailey) is justifiably appalled, while Wendi (@wendibird82) weighs the pros and cons of receiving double pay, government benefits and sipping on the sweet stash of CIA booze. The ladies take a hard turn and get into a heavy discussion about the homeless population and share the deeply personal stories that shaped the opinions they hold today. PLUS, hear why Kaytlin wants to live on top of a trash heap, how Wendi became a pool shark! They also stress the importance of focusing your energy, finding calm and freedom within yourself AND realizing the power you have to change your circumstances. Inspiring stuff. But, does anything even matter since robots are actively taking over the world… starting with this very podcast?!? *** Brought to you by Velvet Swing. Velvet swing is a cannabis-enhanced lubricant known to enhance pleasure. THC dilates the smallest capillaries, which increases blood flow, heightens sensitivity, and can lead to longer, stronger orgasms. The product was meticulously researched by sexual icon Mistress Matisse and delivers a unique levels of sexual satisfaction for men, women & couples. *** EMAIL US: @ [email protected] Twitter: @oldpropodcast Instagram: @oldpropodcast FOLLOW KAYTLIN Twitter: @kaytlinbailey Instagram: @kaytlinbailey FOLLOW WENDI Twitter: @wendistarling Instagram: @wendibird82 *** Produced by Mary Kelly Funky One Kevin MacLeod (incompetech.com) Licensed under Creative Commons: By Attribution 3.0 License http://creativecommons.org/licenses/by/3.0/

The girls are sobered up and exchange their drastically different holiday survival stories: Kaytlin (@kaytlinbailey) finds out the frightening details of exactly how her Father would murder the man she loves, while Wendi (@wendibird82) spills the salacious details of the Christmas Cub she seduced with the help of her sugar daddy! After catching up, the ladies dissect the history of courageously contrarian cunt, Yu Husuan-Chi. They trace Yu's journey from young, admired poet to kept second wife and ultimate destiny as a fiery, desired artist that sabotaged herself into a position of persecution by the very people that once worshipped her. Can a fiercely outspoken and rebellious person thrive in sex work, or are those wild spirits destined to self-sabotage, contributing to their own demise? When did getting wine drunk cease to be a status symbol at the nunnery?? PLUS, the girls clumsily plug their shit AND explain why they would rather be dry fisted than unexpectedly FaceTimed. *** Brought to you by Velvet Swing. Velvet swing is a cannabis-enhanced lubricant known to enhance pleasure. THC dilates the smallest capillaries, which increases blood flow, heightens sensitivity, and can lead to longer, stronger orgasms. The product was meticulously researched by sexual icon Mistress Matisse and delivers a unique levels of sexual satisfaction for men, women & couples. *** EMAIL US: @ [email protected] Twitter: @oldpropodcast Instagram: @oldpropodcast FOLLOW KAYTLIN Twitter: @kaytlinbailey Instagram: @kaytlinbailey FOLLOW WENDI Twitter: @wendistarling Instagram: @wendibird82 *** Produced by Mary Kelly Funky One Kevin MacLeod (incompetech.com) Licensed under Creative Commons: By Attribution 3.0 License http://creativecommons.org/licenses/by/3.0/

After a long day, and even longer pours of whiskey, the girls get loosey goosey as they dive into the sordid life of infamous Hollywood madam, Heidi Fleiss! They recount her stratospheric rise and catastrophic fall that landed her in a dessert home surround by fowl creatures. Kaytlin (@kaytlinbailey) schools Wendi (@wendibird82) on the importance of sending the IRS more than an envelope full of drink tickets, then they detail all the ways in which Kinkos is actively keeping poor people below the poverty line. PLUS, tips on how to not get caught doing drugs in your parents' house AND how to tell if your masseuse is secretly in love with you. *** Brought to you by Velvet Swing. Velvet swing is a cannabis-enhanced lubricant known to enhance pleasure. THC dilates the smallest capillaries, which increases blood flow, heightens sensitivity, and can lead to longer, stronger orgasms. The product was meticulously researched by sexual icon Mistress Matisse and delivers a unique levels of sexual satisfaction for men, women & couples. *** EMAIL US: @ [email protected] Twitter: @oldpropodcast Instagram: @oldpropodcast FOLLOW KAYTLIN Twitter: @kaytlinbailey Instagram: @kaytlinbailey FOLLOW WENDI Twitter: @wendistarling Instagram: @wendibird82 *** Produced by Mary Kelly Funky One Kevin MacLeod (incompetech.com) Licensed under Creative Commons: By Attribution 3.0 License http://creativecommons.org/licenses/by/3.0/

Is this phrase "Ho, ho, ho!" just the joyful expression of a jolly fat man OR the outcry of the original Captain Save-a-Ho?!? This week, the ladies discuss the legend of Patron Saint Nicholas, his relationships with sex workers and the transformation to his most popular incarnation, Santa Claus! The girls also stress the importance of setting boundaries, the delicate issue of breaking ties with a client AND easy tips to help you look your very best in the event of a police department booking photo. Wendi (@wendibird82) explains why she has no interest in the identity of a secret benefactor THEN, Kaytlin (@kaytlinbailey) shares her harrowing survival tale after a week long Twitter and fast food binge. PLUS, is it more vital to grab a knife or your best mascara when answering the front door? Does it even matter when there might be aliens preparing an attack?!? *** Brought to you by Velvet Swing. Velvet swing is a cannabis-enhanced lubricant known to enhance pleasure. THC dilates the smallest capillaries, which increases blood flow, heightens sensitivity, and can lead to longer, stronger orgasms. The product was meticulously researched by sexual icon Mistress Matisse and delivers a unique levels of sexual satisfaction for men, women & couples. *** EMAIL US: @ [email protected] Twitter: @oldpropodcast Instagram: @oldpropodcast FOLLOW KAYTLIN Twitter: @kaytlinbailey Instagram: @kaytlinbailey FOLLOW WENDI Twitter: @wendistarling Instagram: @wendibird82 *** Produced by Mary Kelly Funky One Kevin MacLeod (incompetech.com) Licensed under Creative Commons: By Attribution 3.0 License http://creativecommons.org/licenses/by/3.0/

The ladies come out of the gate swinging, taking aim at abusive men and starting their very own whisper network to help keep fellow sex workers safe in the sometimes treacherous world of the oldest profession. After Wendi (@wendibird82) suggests that they double check the lock on Kaytlin's (@kaytlinbailey) front door, they bring you the story of Wu Zeitan and outline her rise from an impoverished child to concubine of a powerful Emperor, and finally, to her ultimate destiny as a powerful Empress. THEN, they debut a new segment called Dear John where the girls read and respond to an email question from a client AND they spitball possible business ventures that will not land them behind bars! PLUS, has Wendi's ovulation cycle grown so intense that her building is being condemned? Have Kaytlin's antibiotics been replaced with MDMA?? And what the hell is an Equifax sauna?!? *** Brought to you by Velvet Swing. Velvet swing is a cannabis-enhanced lubricant known to enhance pleasure. THC dilates the smallest capillaries, which increases blood flow, heightens sensitivity, and can lead to longer, stronger orgasms. The product was meticulously researched by sexual icon Mistress Matisse and delivers a unique levels of sexual satisfaction for men, women & couples. *** EMAIL US: @ [email protected] Twitter: @oldpropodcast Instagram: @oldpropodcast FOLLOW KAYTLIN Twitter: @kaytlinbailey Instagram: @kaytlinbailey FOLLOW WENDI Twitter: @wendistarling Instagram: @wendibird82 *** Produced by Mary Kelly Funky One Kevin MacLeod (incompetech.com) Licensed under Creative Commons: By Attribution 3.0 License http://creativecommons.org/licenses/by/3.0/

Accusing women of witchcraft and condemning them to death was just one of sadistic methods in the systematic disempowerment of women. But have those seemingly archaic practices and patterns gone to the wayside in today's society, or are they being subtly implemented by law enforcement agencies in an attempt to criminally punish sex workers? The ladies break down specific cases and draw parallels between historic and present day horror stories, while addressing lighter issues like what to do when your older lover starts trending on social media AND the importance of passing down traditional family abortion and birth control recipes. PLUS Kaytlin (@kaytlinbailey) shares one of her seduction secrets and Wendi (@wendibird82) brings up the controversial matter of bovine suicide bombers!!! *** Brought to you by Velvet Swing. Velvet swing is a cannabis-enhanced lubricant known to enhance pleasure. THC dilates the smallest capillaries, which increases blood flow, heightens sensitivity, and can lead to longer, stronger orgasms. The product was meticulously researched by sexual icon Mistress Matisse and delivers a unique levels of sexual satisfaction for men, women & couples. *** EMAIL US [email protected] FOLLOW THE SHOW Twitter: @oldpropodcast Instagram: @oldpropodcast FOLLOW KAYTLIN Twitter: @kaytlinbailey Instagram: @kaytlinbailey FOLLOW WENDI Twitter: @wendistarling Instagram: @wendibird82 *** Produced by Mary Kelly Funky One Kevin MacLeod (incompetech.com) Licensed under Creative Commons: By Attribution 3.0 License http://creativecommons.org/licenses/by/3.0/

Incest, murder, lepers and a masked man locked away in a metal cage… the story of Joanna of Naples plays out like an episode of Game of Thrones just with MORE testicular abuse! The women get into the hypocrisy of morally 'superior' legislators trying to 'save' sex workers while simultaneously (and very vocally) objectifying and harassing women. They also break down the latest in the dismantling of Eros PLUS how is it possible that Kaytlin (@kaytlinbailey) feels more like a kept woman in a traditional relationship than when she was sugaring?? AND **spoiler alert** Wendi (@wendibird82) drops a bombshell about the afterlife!!! *** Brought to you by Velvet Swing. Velvet swing is a cannabis-enhanced lubricant known to enhance pleasure. THC dilates the smallest capillaries, which increases blood flow, heightens sensitivity, and can lead to longer, stronger orgasms. The product was meticulously researched by sexual icon Mistress Matisse and delivers a unique levels of sexual satisfaction for men, women & couples. *** EMAIL US [email protected] FOLLOW THE SHOW Twitter: @theoldpropodcast Instagram: @theoldpropodcast FOLLOW KAYTLIN Twitter: @kaytlinbailey Instagram: @kaytlinbailey FOLLOW WENDI Twitter: @wendistarling Instagram: @wendibird82 *** Produced by Mary Kelly Funky One Kevin MacLeod (incompetech.com) Licensed under Creative Commons: By Attribution 3.0 License http://creativecommons.org/licenses/by/3.0/

We're in the midst of what feels like a societal seachange and the ladies are FIRED UP. In addition to ranting about the latest public sexual assault allegations, they dig into the sordid and tragically exploitative story of stripper, model and media target, Anna Nicole Smith. A larger than life bombshell, Smith was labeled a white trash, gold-digging whore throughout her career then died of a drug overdose at the age of 39. But was she a gold-digger OR was she actually in a loving relationship with J. Howard Marshall who was 63 years older than her? The girls break down the inherent hypocrisy of society's demonization and ostracization of women for capitalizing on their sexuality when they are raised to believe that their most valuable asset is tucked away between their thighs. We also hear about Kaytlin (@kaytlinbailey) throwing away her virginity after several failed attempts AND Wendi's (@wendibird82) creepy new porn obsession! PLUS are there benefits to loose, hanging jowls? What kind of monster doesn't let you have a glass of water?? Can you actually motorboat someone to death?!? *** Brought to you by Velvet Swing. Velvet swing is a cannabis-enhanced lubricant known to enhance pleasure. THC dilates the smallest capillaries, which increases blood flow, heightens sensitivity, and can lead to longer, stronger orgasms. The product was meticulously researched by sexual icon Mistress Matisse and delivers a unique levels of sexual satisfaction for men, women & couples. *** EMAIL US [email protected] FOLLOW THE SHOW Twitter: @theoldpropodcast Instagram: @theoldpropodcast FOLLOW KAYTLIN Twitter: @kaytlinbailey Instagram: @kaytlinbailey FOLLOW WENDI Twitter: @wendistarling Instagram: @wendibird82 *** Produced by Mary Kelly Funky One Kevin MacLeod (incompetech.com) Licensed under Creative Commons: By Attribution 3.0 License http://creativecommons.org/licenses/by/3.0/

With Kaytlin (@kaytlinbailey) back at the helm, the ladies dive into the story of Phryne, infamously powerful courtesan during the ancient Greek Empire. They also detail the shift in Grecian society that streamlined all sex workers and essentially morphed Athens into the Walmart of prostitution. The girls then tackle the issue of women being sexy vs. strong. Does our society still view female sensuality as a mystical, destabilizing force that strips men of all self control? Why in the world would a chick force her friends to take off their makeup at a sleepover?? What kind of a discount does Wendi (@wendistarling) give for being a cool dude?!? They also breakdown the current stripper strike in NYC which addresses the very important question… what in the actual fuck is a 'STARtender'?!? *** Brought to you by Velvet Swing. Velvet swing is a cannabis-enhanced lubricant known to enhance pleasure. THC dilates the smallest capillaries, which increases blood flow, heightens sensitivity, and can lead to longer, stronger orgasms. The product was meticulously researched by sexual icon Mistress Matisse and delivers a unique levels of sexual satisfaction for men, women & couples. *** Jacque the Stripper EMAIL US [email protected] FOLLOW THE SHOW Twitter: @theoldpropodcast Instagram: @theoldpropodcast FOLLOW KAYTLIN Twitter: @kaytlinbailey Instagram: @kaytlinbailey FOLLOW WENDI Twitter: @wendistarling Instagram: @wendibird82 *** Produced by Mary Kelly Funky One Kevin MacLeod (incompetech.com) Licensed under Creative Commons: By Attribution 3.0 License http://creativecommons.org/licenses/by/3.0/

What exactly does a Wednesday feel like? When will it finally be cashmere weather?!? The ladies address the tough questions before getting to their woman of the hour: Mary Jones aka Beefsteak Pete. Mary was a 33 year old black trans sex worker who has the literal & proverbial balls to show up in court in full drag in New York City in 1836. She was charged with larceny NOT with prostitution or sodomy because her clients refused to admit knowingly hooking up with a trans woman. After they delve into the delicate issue of 'tricking' clients, Kaytlin makes the case for pooling together to provide a basic living wage to help alleviate global poverty while Wendi progressively hot-boxes her pussy throughout the episode. They also discuss the unsolved death of trans and sex worker rights activist Marsha P. Johnson and debate whether or not prop comics qualify as humans. Can we come together as a society and raise each other up? Will robots be able to take over your local drug store?? How much can a bitch get for a cunt-soaked cashmere dress?!? *** FOLLOW US (on social media, not down a dark alley pretty please) Twitter: @oldpropodcast @kaytlinbailey @wendistarling Instagram: @oldpropodcast @kaytlinbailey @wendibird82 [email protected] *** Brought to you by Velvet Swing. Velvet swing is a cannabis-enhanced lubricant known to enhance pleasure. THC dilates the smallest capillaries, which increases blood flow, heightens sensitivity, and can lead to longer, stronger orgasms. The product was meticulously researched by sexual icon Mistress Matisse and delivers a unique levels of sexual satisfaction for men, women & couples. *** Produced by Mary Kelly Funky One Kevin MacLeod (incompetech.com) Licensed under Creative Commons: By Attribution 3.0 License http://creativecommons.org/licenses/by/3.0/

It's a hot one outta the gate because Kaytlin (@kaytlinbailey) invites Wendi (@wendibird82) into her bedroom for a surprisingly unsexy reason! Then, after discussing their favorite, overpriced reusable containers, they dive into the sordid tale and love story of Harriet Hicks, one of the few documented cases of harassment and abuse of women by the government along with a gaggle of well-meaning but ill-informed feminists. Harriet worked as a prostitute during inception of the CDA (Contagious Diseases Act) in 19th century England. After an outbreak of syphillis in the military, the government decided against testing and treating the soldiers (it was proven to lower morale) and INSTEAD opted to randomly test prostitutes and pretty much any other women walking alone at night. Or during the day. Or early morning. Sometimes late afternoon. Once corralled and assaulted with a speculum, a woman would either be deemed clean enough to return to her life or condemned a diseased whore and locked away in solitary confinement for an undetermined amount of time. Once they finish screaming about the patriarchy, the ladies get into the pros and cons of consuming mercury AND using makeup products in lieu of tampons! They also share a couple of their harrowing hook-up tales AND expose a very modern law that penalized women for carrying condoms. PLUS, the girls read a fan email and debut their new segment "Dear Johns". Prepare to cleanse yourself of any misconceptions you may have had about sex work… *** Brought to you by Velvet Swing. Velvet swing is a cannabis-enhanced lubricant known to enhance pleasure. THC dilates the smallest capillaries, which increases blood flow, heightens sensitivity, and can lead to longer, stronger orgasms. The product was meticulously researched by sexual icon Mistress Matisse and delivers a unique levels of sexual satisfaction for men, women & couples. *** Produced by Mary Kelly Funky One Kevin MacLeod (incompetech.com) Licensed under Creative Commons: By Attribution 3.0 License http://creativecommons.org/licenses/by/3.0/

The ladies are going waaaay back with this episode's historic whore, the goddess of romantic love and fertility, Ishtar. She was worshipped through the bodies of church-sanctioned prostitutes who were trained in arts of tantra, healing AND they are rumored to have started the halloween tradition of the slutty nun costume. In addition to breaking down the tragic shift of women being treated like people to property, Kaytlin recalls the time she aided in a soldier's reentry into polite society and Wendi waxes poetic about not one but TWO times she was publicly fingered! After making a handful of terrible Hogwarts puns, they discuss the persecution of a living goddess dedicated to tantric healing PLUS fun new ways to realign your butt chakra! *** Brought to you by Velvet Swing. Velvet swing is a cannabis-enhanced lubricant known to enhance pleasure. THC dilates the smallest capillaries, which increases blood flow, heightens sensitivity, and can lead to longer, stronger orgasms. The product was meticulously researched by sexual icon Mistress Matisse and delivers a unique levels of sexual satisfaction for men, women & couples. *** Produced by Mary Kelly Funky One Kevin MacLeod (incompetech.com) Licensed under Creative Commons: By Attribution 3.0 License http://creativecommons.org/licenses/by/3.0/

One of most difficult aspects of engaging in sex work is dealing with the judgement of friends, family and the general public if and when you decide to come out. With our technological advances, it's easier than ever for internet trolls to hide behind an anonymous persona and attack strangers through multiple platforms. It's nightmarish and it's been going on since the dawn of man. During the 16th Century in Venice, Italy, courtesan Veronica Franco endured public shaming that attempted to strip away her status as a prolific poet and author. The ladies weigh out pros and cons of coming out publicly AND stress the importance of fucking dudes that look the same and taking probiotics! They also celebrate a surprisingly public figure that has spoken openly about her past as dominatrix and phone sex operator as well as spoiling the fuck out of the poorly executed film Tulip Fever. *** Brought to you by Velvet Swing. Velvet swing is a cannabis-enhanced lubricant known to enhance pleasure. THC dilates the smallest capillaries, which increases blood flow, heightens sensitivity, and can lead to longer, stronger orgasms. The product was meticulously researched by sexual icon Mistress Matisse and delivers a unique levels of sexual satisfaction for men, women & couples. *** Produced by Mary Kelly Funky One Kevin MacLeod (incompetech.com) Licensed under Creative Commons: By Attribution 3.0 License http://creativecommons.org/licenses/by/3.0/

It's the very FIRST episode of The Oldest Profession with comedians and unapologetic sex workers, Kaytlin Bailey and Wendi Starling and the ladies are coming out strong by putting the modern brothel system on blast AND recounting the life and times of historic bad bitch, Ah Toy. One of the first Chinese women to settle in the burgeoning city of San Francisco way back in 1849. In addition to recounting Ah Toy's rise to becoming a famous prostitute and her battles against the increasingly racist judicial system, the ladies discuss using basketballs for sex AND the importance of supporting local pussy. Ah Toy may have struggled against the court system, but she miraculously survived the battle of the Chinese Tongs vs Japanese Spatulas. They also tackle the issue of deciphering the difference between trafficking victims and sex workers making an informed decision. *** Brought to you by Velvet Swing. Velvet swing is a cannabis-enhanced lubricant known to enhance pleasure. THC dilates the smallest capillaries, which increases blood flow, heightens sensitivity, and can lead to longer, stronger orgasms. The product was meticulously researched by sexual icon Mistress Matisse and delivers a unique levels of sexual satisfaction for men, women & couples. *** Produced by Mary Kelly Cold Funk Kevin MacLeod (incompetech.com) Licensed under Creative Commons: By Attribution 3.0 License http://creativecommons.org/licenses/by/3.0/

Kaytlin Bailey and Wendi Starling are mouthy comedians and unapologetic former sex workers. Instead of shamefully hiding their pasts as pussy peddlers, these two broads are enthusiastically examining and celebrating the storied history of the world's oldest profession and the heroic whores that had a hand (or at least a pinky finger) in shaping society as we know it today. Funky One Kevin MacLeod (incompetech.com) Licensed under Creative Commons: By Attribution 3.0 License http://creativecommons.org/licenses/by/3.0/