The JV Club with Janet Varney

We know what you’re thinking- “Did Janet start a new All Dogs All the Time podcast? No, but JV and awesome guest, writer and standup Melissa Stephens (“Key and Peele”) go long and deep into canine biz early on in the episode, eventually begrudgingly opening up the conversation to other vital matters such as being a girl on the boys’ baseball team and coping with rejection when all you want is a clammy hand to hold.

Comedian and You’re the Worst writer Alison Bennett comes over for a sexily-lit evening of dissecting the strange magnetism of true crime, the wilds of rural Pennsylvania, and the appeal of a jacuzzi filled with chocolate pudding in episode 194 of the podcast. And watch out, Cyndi Lauper! You’ve got competition!

Get that myriad of plates spinning and put on all of your hats to keep up with the multi-faceted Tamara Krinsky (Marvel’s West Coast Correspondent), with tales of sleep-away camp, classical theatre and the wonders of science!

It’s time for the copious talents of Molly Lewis, who knows what it feels like to blow up the internet and suddenly find yourself in the company of your heroes. While, I might add, handling it all with the grace and modesty of a total pro (which, of course, she has long since become). So tune your uke and sing along!* *It’s possible that no actual singing happens

We’re going to use this description as an opportunity to express deep regret that we did not ask the wonderful Jessica McKenna (Party Over Here) what she meant when she said “Lucky the Leprechaun knocks on your door" during the Irish Pride portion of the podcast. That may require a Part Two! In the meantime, throw on your matte black unitard and get dancing to Flogging Molly, and Happy St. Patrick’s Day!

It’s the charming and delightful Amanda Lund, everybody! What can you expect from this episode? Some free association: wigs and corn mazes, princesses and guacamole, ballet and boob-touching. In other words, the things that matter in life.

Enjoy the gentle rocking of this special live episode, recorded for the first time ever on a boat. Janet is joined by the immeasurably talented Kelly Sue DeConnick (Captain Marvel, Pretty Deadly) and cellist Zoe Keating (Manhattan, The Returned), who are so filled with sound advice and inspiring ideas, you’ll inevitably finish the episode and create your best work ever!

Release of Carla Gallo! It's an embarrassment of riches... or maybe just an embarrassment of embarrassments in episode 50 (Wow! We made it to 50!) with ridiculously fun guest Carla Gallo (Bones) - complete with revealing stories about prom nights gone awry, blooming late, and... um... cat lockets.

Get schooled on the sizable merits of ska by Lady to Lady podcast’s Brandie Posey in episode 188. And not to oversimplify Brandie’s amazing life stories, but I think she would approve of me saying there are some doozies to devour. Bon Appetit!

Janet marvels at the high school debate prowess of episode 188’s guest, Emily Heller (Baby Geniuses), the social politics of which office you run for in student council, and circus camp, circus camp, circus camp.

It's a special re-release of Kathleen Rose Perkins! The charming Kathleen Rose Perkins (Episodes) recounts the joys and challenges of being a certified bird-owner, being heard in a family of boys, and what we’re really doing when we’re eating eggs. Want more? Find out where Kathleen’s future home is, courtesy of another glorious game of M.A.S.H.!

Recorded in a cozy hotel room at SF Sketchfest, Janet and Janeane Garofalo sit wedged between the wall and the bed, following whatever tangent might present itself. Does Janet get left in the dust in matters intellectual, political and otherwise? Sure. Is that okay? It’s going to have to be, because Janeane is smart, fast, and fantastic.

In a shocking and exciting break from tradition, Janet’s friend crush Charles W. “Chuck” Bryant from the beloved Stuff You Should Know podcast joins his fellow guest, the fiercely smart and funny Veronica Belmont as the first non-Boy of Summer in this live episode from SF Sketchfest! They’re joined by the sublime Matt Nathanson, who had everyone onstage and in the audience in love with him by the end of the show.

Janet is joined by the President of the American chapter of SWOP: Sex Workers Outreach Project and professional dominatrix Savannah Sly for a rapid-fire discussion of perception, experience, misconception and politics in this goes-by-way-too-quickly-and-could-have-been-three-hours-long episode. Thankfully there’s still time to talk about a mutual favorite female X-Men character and a good chance that JV and Savannah will end up neighbors on a magic mountain.

Get ready for a San Francisco-style hair-buzzing with one of the shining stars of You’re the Worst, Aya Cash, as we dash from Buddhism to dental care jewelry (yep) to the startling discovery of youth that not every citizen is a Bay Area liberal in this final episode of 2015! Happy New Year!

All-around badass journalist (and former sex/dating columnist) Jessica Ogilvie drops by, and the tangents are nothing if not feverishly robust and tendril-like. What can we say? She’s fascinating, brave, and funny… and she took her written M.A.S.H. results home to frame.

Not unlike making lemonade from lemons, learn how to make the best of learning to play the clarinet when your heart called out for a flute from terrific guest Collette Wolfe (“You’re the Worst”). The woods of Virginia, a friend who tells you when your fashion’s bad, and Janet’s seeming inability to stop talking about post-Feminist Feminism also punctuate Episode 181.

The absolutely splendid Ingrid Oliver ("Doctor Who”) can breeze seamlessly from evocative quandaries about politics to the wonders of a Whopper Junior in Episode 180 of the podcast, where the Janet-New-Friend-Swoon-O-Meter (previously not actually a thing, now very much a thing) goes off the charts.

Heads-up! We did things a little differently this week for a podcast mashup! Carla interviews Janet about doing improv as a teaser for Carla’s new improv podcast, Improv Yak… until the proverbial tables are turned and Janet gets back to the place she feels most comfortable: asking people about their weird teen habits.

Guys, it’s just two gals from Tucson, Arizona, talkin’ shop. A teenaged Kate Walsh (Private Practice) body-paints, yearbook staffs, and drama clubs her way through a couple of high schools, including the one Janet attended! Are these two connected by a magical Arizonan connection? Or is it a Vonnegut-esque granfalloon? Either way, they’re both in love with their new web series, Everyone’s Crazy But Us.

Throw on your band uniform and pick up that flute for a march with Mary Holland (Blunt Talk), whose people-pleasing teenage spirit went from a small bluegrassy town to the sexy seclusion of a boarding school in Episode 177, where Janet’s middling detective skills are put to the test.

It’s a Portland-tastic live episode from the delightful All Jane Comedy Festival in Oregon, featuring the brilliant talents of Sarah Mirk (Bitch Media), Janet Weiss (Sleater-Kinney), and musical guest Hutch Harris (The Thermals)!

Heads up, Akron! The simply superb Rhea Butcher arrives armed and ready for Episode 175 with a killer hairstyle, insightful thoughts on teenage sexuality and skateboarding, and a justified robust admiration of Claire Huxtable.

Show off your grungiest snowman with Episode 174’s guest, voice actor-virtuouso and author Tara Platt, who didn’t always rise to the top of the popularity heap in her youth as a practical atheist during her family’s many ramblings. Figure out where your own safety nets lie as Tara and Janet trapeze through fear, change, stability and a good spoonful of harissa, which may or may not be the thing we thought we were talking about. Mysteries!

Climb into your co-ed dorm’s shower and have a good laugh/cry with the fantastic Jessica Merizan (don’t worry, she knows you think it’s “marzipan”) as she and Janet slip and slide all over about 30 different tangents at once, including mafia (the game, not the crime syndicate) and Guillermo del Toro’s wonderful monsters. And! Janet finds out what Xanga is, which until this moment she didn’t even know started with the letter “x."

Episode 171 brings the extraordinary you-have-to-hear-it-to-believe it story of actress and comedian Lisa Kate David, who has become a bit of an expert on dating in LA with no nipples. And that’s just part of what has been the mother of all roller coasters of a life. So pull your fresh baked bread out of the oven and huddle in!

Have you said hello to your bottom teeth lately? Check in with the lovely set of Joy Osmanski (Grey’s Anatomy, The Loop) in Episode 171, where you’ll also find genetic mysteries, late night television, and the commonalities between Anne of Green Gables and Laura Ashley.

Come see Janet this weekend at LA Podfest, www.lapodfest.com

With the Boys of Summer gone but not forgotten, Episode 170’s guest Kelly Carlin shares stories of adventurous ropes courses, making it alive through the high times of Los Angeles in the 70’s-80’s, and how her art/work informed her bond with her legendary father, comedian George Carlin. Plus: the endless virtues of peanut butter!

Episode 169 brings us to the end of Boys of Summer, and better way to go than with the one and only Dana Gould (Full disclosure, no search was done to determine whether there are other Dana Goulds out there)? It’s an episode replete with tangents, including defining nostalgia, a Simpsons episode origin story, and two people hurtling uncomfortably forward into a conversation about body hair and sex.

Fathers of the late ’80’s early ’90’s, protect your daughters! Protect them… from THE PROMINATOR. There’s more to be said about this episode with the multi talented and hilarious Christopher Sabat (Dragonball Z), but it’s really, really tough to follow something as horribly wonderful as THE PROMINATOR. So discover yourself with a listen, why don’t you?

It’s a party of Janetors and Adventurkateers with episode 167 and Boy of Summer Hal Lublin (The Thrilling Adventure Hour). Will someone please help Hal find his lost plush Pluto doll? Or at bare minimum, make him a t-shirt like the one he describes on the podcast? These are pressing human issues.

Eat your heart out, Billy Idol! Janet and Boys of Summer guest, the simply wonderful Ron Funches (Undateable) ignore hits like "Eyes Without a Face” from the semi-comfort of a dressing room at Outside Lands music festival in San Francisco. And in an unprecedented turn of events, Ron spends the entire podcast lying down. Friendship!

Turn that baseball cap around for Episode 165, because it’s tennis in Texas with the deeply awesome James Roday (Psych)! Peel the oniony layers of a man who knows the immense value of emotive singer/songwriters, a heaping plate of Mexican food, and a puffy vest.

Look out! Episode 164 in the Boys of Summer series brings you Janet’s first boyfriend, the talented and possibly-too-handsome Barrett Kime, also known as the Prince Charming to her clunky, pumpkin-toothed Snow White in their first grade musical. And it was pretty much all downhill from there for the next decade, with rock-throwing, surreptitious smooching, petty jealousies and everything else that comes along with young, young, YOUNG love.

It’s the badass creator of You’re the Worst, Stephen Falk! Episode 162 lets you straddle the disparate high school worlds of theatre, jazz band and sports, and then fall in love with the new girl in school, who naturally drives a stick-shift pick-up truck. Swoon!

Swoon over the delight that is musician Rhett Miller (Old 97’s) as Boys of Summer rocks on, with a robust list of awesome and embarrassing erstwhile band names, tales of the Lone Star state, and a tip of the hat to Seventeen magazine. No episode has ever been groovier.

Who ain’t afraid of no ghosts? Depends on which version of episode 161’s guest, Gabriel Diani (The Selling), we’re talking about. So crack open your favorite comic book (ours is Mondo Man) and throw on some oldies to get yourself in the mood for this podcast treasure.

Enjoy Janet’s stumble through the early part of Episode 160 with the insanely funny John Ross Bowie (Big Bang Theory) as he does his very best to be gracious about a common misconception. Then! Stick around for a look at New York’s Hell’s Kitchen in the 80’s… or at least one city block of it. And get your straight edge on!

Bing Bong! It’s time for another Boys of Summer episode of The JV Club with comedian and actor Amir Talai. So! Reflect on your Mindset- are you open to failing to become better at something? Have you spit into a cup to find out your origin story? And vitally important: when was the last time you watched Man on Fire?

Hey Everybody— it’s the sublime Marc Evan Jackson! The latest Boys of Summer episode will reveal some compelling and charming new things about the man you may also know as Sparks Nevada from Thrilling Adventure Hour. Addendum: you will not be asked to sign a pledge to abstain from drinking, smoking, sex, or dancing during the consumption of this episode. We are not the boss of you.

Breakdance your way through Episode 157 with one of the busiest and coolest guys around, Dante Basco (Hook, Avatar: The Last Airbender), who reminds us that family, curiosity, and the occasional all-night conversation with friends can yield rich rewards. And find out what it means to “know what you know” (then you’ll know)!

The JV Club’s Boys of Summer returns with gusto, courtesy the wonderful Colin Hanks! Sink into episode 156 where you’ll marvel at the benefits of a multi-purpose room and, perhaps most importantly, learn how to say two VERY useful phrases in everyone’s favorite dead language, Latin.

Episode 155 finds artist, writer and educator Kimberly Brooks popping over to share her boundless insights in an exploration of too many things to list… but here are a few anyway: Art! Feminism! Physics! Fearlessness! Eggs Florentine!

Welcome Episode 154’s hilarious guest Colleen Smith (No You Shut Up!), who patiently puts up with Janet’s attempts to force her into writing a children’s book based on her experiences as a lanky redhead in the beautiful state of Hawaii. Aloha!

It’s Episode 153 with the endlessly awesome and prolific Felicia Day (Geek and Sundry). Learn the pros and cons of spending your high school years outside of high school proper, where you have the chance to become as weird and as wonderful as you like. And! One of the swiftest and most satisfying sets of M.A.S.H. answers you could dare to dream for!

Meet the high school thespian who wasn’t afraid to tuck her giant 80’s bangs under her babushka for the most authentic Fiddler on the Roof performance in Episode 152 of The JV Club, with the inimitable Mary Birdsong (Reno 911). You’ll also find out more about the origin story of her delightful last name, celebrate unaffordable horses, and learn the surprising way Mary’s mom got her to Paris.

Saddle up, because episode 151 with Jennifer Hale (Bioshock, Mass Effect, Halo) is a whirlwind of slipping through the timestream, listening to your gut, and lessons only a horse can teach you. NOTE! Regardless of your age, you will want to be Jennifer Hale when you grow up.

It’s the 150th Episode of The JV Club, and how better to celebrate than with one JV chit-chatting with another JV (the simply fantastic Jean Villepique)? With stories from a tall girl with big dreams from a small town in New Jersey, it’s an episode Bruce Springsteen could (and should!) write a song about.

There’s just something about people from New Mexico that makes them special. That’s certainly true of Episode 149’s guest, the huge-hearted Natalie Garcia (MaeDay Rescue), who is a veritable renaissance woman with a love of vintage attire, singing music, and saving pups.