The Growth League

This weeks wisdom comes from the most unlikely places. Just about 150 years ago. If you're anything like me you've heard of or sampled the works of Henry David Thoreau, Ralph Waldo Emerson, Susan B. Anthony, Mark Twain, and you thought, I should really make time to read more of those books. And that time has never really come around. Well, my friend John Jantsch has done us all a solid and put together a new book with a daily excerpt from each of these authors and many more. John is a very successful though leader. His Duct Tape Marketing blog was chosen as a Forbes favorite and his Duct Tape Marketing podcast was called a "must listen" by Fast Company magazine. Seth Godin called John the "Peter Drucker of small business tactics." This book is something very new for this marketing guru. It is titled the Self Reliant Entrepreneur, but the concepts we're going to discuss are immensely helpful for anyone trying to create something in this world and for anyone trying to make a difference in their organization. John and I cover:What it means to be self reliant and why it's so important to accomplishing our goalsHow to change your relationship with fearWhy play is so important to creating your best workWhy being cautious about how you are perceived will get in your way of creating real change, and How to revise your definition of success and happiness Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Today's episode is about the number one thing that prevents us from being the person we want to be; the number one way we hurt ourselves and the people we love. I'm talking about Shame. As Brene Brown states: "Shame corrodes the very part of us that believes we are capable of change." I tried to get Brene Brown on the show and wasn't able to this season, but I wasn't going to let that stop me from having what I believe is the most important conversation we need to have. So I invited my therapist, Candy Smith, to discuss Brene Brown's book, The Gifts of Imperfection. This episode is like sitting in on my personal therapy session discussing shame. Including a moment of vulnerability, where I suggest a parenting technique I've been trying with my son, and Candy kindly tells me how I might unintentionally be causing shame. Candy has been a licensed therapist for several decades. She specializes in working with adults, and children with trauma. That's how I met her. And in every session, I've left with lessons and sayings that I could come back to again and again. And I'm confident that's just how you are going to feel after you meet Candy. Candy and I are going to talk about: How shame sabotages our relationships,How to treat someone confessing something they feel shame about, and How to stop shaming others, which, it turns out, we all do pretty frequently. Important Links for the Show:The ultimate fitness tracker that doesn't shame you, butactually helps you make positive changes in your life: https://www.whoop.com/ and use code DIANA at checkout for 15% off!A bank that prides itself on how it treats both it's employees and it's customers: http://nbkc.com/diana - get a box of awesome Professional AF stuff for signing up, including a book that we discuss on the show!Get a better nights sleep with the Purple mattress. To get the Purple pillow I covet for FREE with the purchase of your mattress, just text the code "DIANA" to 84-888. And you can combine this offer with what they have on the site!The Brene Brown book we discussed today: https://www.amazon.com/Gifts-Imperfection-Think-Supposed-Embrace/dp/159285849X/ref=sr_1_1?keywords=gifts+of+imperfection&qid=1570996976&s=books&sr=1-1Candy online: https://www.candysmithcounseling.com/Professional AF Facebook Group: https://www.facebook.com/groups/943925015810362/Diana online: www.DianaKander.com Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Jennifer Petriglieri is a Professor of Organizational Behavior at INSEAD, and the author of Couples That Work. A book that’s coming out this week on making a dual career relationship successful. Prior to joining INSEAD, she was a Post-Doctoral Fellow of Organizational Behavior at the Harvard Business School. Having lived and worked on three continents, she is now settled in France with her husband and their two children.Jennifer has spent the last six years studying over a hundred couples in a variety of roles and types of relationships from all over the world.Drawing on this research, she highlights the three distinct yet predictable transitions that all couples go through and offers practical guidance in the form of questions, exercises and activities that couples can use to overcome the most pressing challenges they face.From couples in their mid-20s to those in their mid-60s, from heterosexual couples to same-sex couples, her book has something of value to strengthen all of our relationships. I believe it's going to be the book I gift the most over the years, and I'm starting this week. Make sure to listen after the show to find out how to get a copy from me! If you love todays episode, please share it online with your friends, and don't forget to tag me so I can thank you! And if you haven't done so already, it would mean so much to me if you would subscribe and review the show! Important Links for the Show:The ultimate fitness tracker that actually helps you make changes in your life: https://www.whoop.com/ and use code DIANA at checkout for 15% off!Get 1/2 of your daily fruits and vegetables in a convenient shot!: https://superfoodshot.co and use code DIANA at checkout for 30% off.If you created a couples contract with your bank, it would look like this: http://nbkc.com/diana - get a box of awesome Professional AF stuff for signing up.Jennifer's new book: https://www.amazon.com/Couples-That-Work-Dual-Career-Thrive/dp/163369724XJennifer online: https://www.jpetriglieri.com/Professional AF Facebook Group: https://www.facebook.com/groups/943925015810362/Diana online: www.DianaKander.com Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Kim Scott is the author of the NYT bestseller Radical Candor: Be a Kickass Boss without Losing your Humanity. Kim led AdSense, YouTube, and Doubleclick Online Sales and Operations at Google and then joined Apple to develop and teach a leadership program. Kim has been a CEO coach at Dropbox, Qualtrics, Twitter, and several other tech companies.Kim received her MBA from Harvard Business School and her BA from Princeton. She is the author of three novels; she and her husband Andy Scott are parents of twins.Today's episode is not just a rehashing of Radical Candor. Kim is going to share:Why she had to write an update to her book because some people were misapplying it.How being nice on your team produces mediocre work product.How to help your team members do the best work of their lives.What she thinks of a new psychological safety tool I've been teaching to teams.The special challenges women face when receiving feedback and giving feedback.What men need to know about giving feedback to their female direct reports.Please Tweet, Instagram, and Facebook your biggest takeaways from this amazing conversation with Kim!Important Links for the Show:See for yourself what a radically caring bank looks like: http://nbkc.com/diana - get a box of awesome Professional AF stuff for signing up. The ultimate STEM project each month: http://kiwico.com/diana - my code gets your first month freeGet 1/2 of your daily fruits and vegetables in a convenient shot!: https://superfoodshot.co and use code DIANA at checkout for 30% off!Kim's new book: https://www.amazon.com/Radical-Candor-Revised-Kick-Ass-Humanity/dp/1250235375/ref=sr_1_4?keywords=kim+scott&qid=1569806709&s=gateway&sr=8-4Kim on Twitter: https://twitter.com/kimballscott?ref_src=twsrc%5Egoogle%7Ctwcamp%5Eserp%7Ctwgr%5EauthorProfessional AF Facebook Group: https://www.facebook.com/groups/943925015810362/Diana online: www.DianaKander.com Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Denise Shull is a decision coach and performance architect for hedge fund managers, traders and professional athletes. She is the Author of Market Mind Games - book on the radical psychology of making decisions and risk. And she is the inspiration for the character "Wendy Rhodes" in the Showtime show, BillionsDenise's thesis is that there's a common mis-belief that you should "set your emotions aside when making a decision" and she will explain why this is an ineffective way to make good decisions. Based off of scientific research, we now know that it's impossible to make decisions without feelings. In Denise's book, I read about a study where people had brain injuries to that part of the brain that controlled emotions, and those people were incapable of making any decisions. Not what to wear, not what to eat. It was crazy. So how do we stop ignoring our emotions and instead learn to understand what they are telling us.Denise will also share:The most significant question you need to ask yourself before making any important decisionHow to figure out if you are making a decision for sound reasons or because of the two big fears that most influence our decisions, andThe proper way to mourn a failure so that you can get over it and keep it from holding you back. Important Links for the Show:The bank that feels right: http://nbkc.com/dianaDenise on Twitter: https://twitter.com/DeniseKShull?ref_src=twsrc%5Egoogle%7Ctwcamp%5Eserp%7Ctwgr%5EauthorDenise's company: https://therethinkgroup.netProfessional AF Facebook Group: https://www.facebook.com/groups/943925015810362/Diana online: www.DianaKander.com Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Everywhere she goes, people ask Esther Wojcicki for parenting advice. That's because each one of her three daughters has a crazy awesome job: Susan is the CEO of YouTube, Janet is a professor at UC San Francisco, and Anne is the co founder and CEO of 23andMe.Ester has also been a journalism teacher for more than 35 years at Palo Alto High School. The students that swear by her method include actor and director, James Franco and Jeremy Lin, a Harvard graduate and point guard in the NBA.So what is it? What's her methodology? Esther has just released a book called How to Raise Successful People in which she outlines a five step process for raising successful people. I read the book and interviewed ester about 3 months ago, and since implementing the methodology it has radically transformed my relationship with my son. What's more, this isn't just a way to raise happy/successful kids. It's a method you can take to work to have happy and successful employees. You can use these 5 steps in any relationship you want to improve.Here are the five steps. They spell the word TRICK. T-R-I-C-KTrust, Respect, Independence, Collaboration, and KindnessI can't wait to for you to hear this really insightful conversation, and be sure to listen after the show to find out what happened when I interviewed my son on how Jason and I have been doing in each of these categories. Important Links for the Show:Amazing kids activity in a box: http://kiwico.com/dianaThe bank you've been waiting for: http://nbkc.com/dianaEsther's projects:http://www.moonshotsedu.comhttps://raisesuccessfulpeople.comProfessional AF Facebook Group: https://www.facebook.com/groups/943925015810362/Diana online: www.DianaKander.com Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Most people know Annie as a professional poker player. She’s won numerous poker championships and millions of dollars in prizes. I got to know her in 2004 when I really got into poker. My first book was actually a business novel that took place at the world series of poker and used poker hands to teach important innovation lessons. So when I saw Annie, one of the few women who were even competing in the tournament, keep winning, keep being the only woman at one final table after another, and keep doing it with class and style, I became a huge fan. What I didn’t know about Annie until doing research for this interview is that she graduated from Columbia University and then graduate school at the University of Pennsylvania. That she won a fellowship from the National Science Foundation and got a doctorate in cognitive psychology. Annie is an entrepreneur, a committed advocate for important causes, a mother, a wife, and the author of several books including my favorite and the subject of our discussion today: Thinking in Bets, Making Smarter Decisions When You Don’t Have All the Facts. Today Annie is going to tell us:Why you should focus on process rather than outcome to decide whether you made a good decisionWhy there’s a competition going on all the time between your short term wants and your long term wants and how to prevent your short term impulses from sabotaging your long term growth.Our mistaken belief on how we form our assumptions and beliefs about the world – hint, you aren’t as objective as you thinkAn incredible way to get people to question their assumptions and beliefs in a way they aren’t naturally inclined to doThe value of thinking of your work projects as betsHow to identify the habits that your team rewards and understand whether you are actually helping your causeIn the Kander Family we have a saying. Last one, best one. It means whatever you’re doing, make the last rep, the last try, your best effort. And this episode is certainly that for this season. I hope you enjoy this amazing conversation on Professional AF! Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

This week I sat down with Sally Helgesen. Sally is one of the premier experts on women’s leadership. She has been a best-selling author, speaker and leadership coach for thirty years. Her mission has always been to help women recognize, articulate and act on their greatest strengths. Her latest book is called How Women Rise and it explains how the behaviors that served you so well at the beginning of your career, that got you promoted, are many times the same behaviors that keep you from big leadership positions. Basically, what got you here won’t get you there. Today, Sally is going to share:- How to overcome your reluctance to claim your achievements- Why you are overvaluing your expertise to your own detriment- Why you shouldn’t just expect others to notice and reward your work, and what you should do instead- How to not fall into the perfection trap- Why you can’t make behavior change by yourself – the secret ingredient you need to really make new behaviors stickWhether you are traveling by plane, train or car, walking your dog or doing the dishes, get a pen handy because you’re going to hear some powerful advice on this episode of Professional AF! Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

This week I sat down with Amy Morin, a psychotherapist turned “accidental” author. You’re going to hear Amy share her very moving, personal story, but I just wanted to brag on her for a second. Amy gave one of the most popular TEDx talks of all time—The Secret of Becoming Mentally Strong. It’s been viewed more than 8 million times. She’s a regular columnist for Forbes, Inc., and Psychology Today and a parenting expert for Verywell. Her articles reach more than 2 million readers every month. And she’s the author of 3 Bestselling books, the latest of which is called 13 Things Mentally Strong Women Don’t Do. And the interview is amazing because we spend about 2/3 of the conversation talking about specific habits mentally strong women should stop, and the last third on the science of creating lasting habit change. Today Amy is going to share:- How to keep self-doubt from sabotaging our goals- How the way we raise young girls has a big impact on their mental strength- How to deal with critical feedback- Why women aren’t getting the right kind of feedback at work, and how to ask the right way- The biggest mistake we make trying to change a habitBuckle your seatbelts. And get ready for some powerful insights on this episode of Professional AF! Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

This week I spoke with Brad Staats, a professor at the UNC Business School and author of Never Stop Learning: Stay Relevant, Reinvent Yourself, and Thrive. Brad also works with companies around the world to develop their learning and analytics strategies. He has won numerous teaching and research awards, including an award as one of the 40 most outstanding business-school professors under 40 in the world, and the Prize for best article in Harvard Business Review on leadership, and I learned about Brad’s book from the Adam Grant’s Next Big Idea Club, a pretty prestigious collection of business books. Brad has been a venture capitalist, an investment banker at Goldman Sachs, and a strategic planner at Dell. And today Brad’s going to share: - Why we’re so bad at learning from our mistakes and three strategies that will help us get much better- Why our bias towards action is actually hurting our performance- Several counterintuitive tactics that will significantly increase your work performance- How to run a meeting that encourages people to share their thoughts instead of shutting them down- How to know if you and the people you work with are good at learning Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

This episode is the most practical Professional AF that we’ve done. I had a chance to interview Fran Hauser, a long-time media executive, startup investor and best-selling author of The Myth of the Nice Girl. Fran is best known for her role building PEOPLE.com – one of the biggest media brands online – She made the leap to early stage investing in 2014. And 18 of the 20 companies she has invested in are founded by women, highlighting her broader commitment to increasing the representation of female founders and investors. Fran’s first book, THE MYTH OF THE NICE GIRL: deconstructs the negative perception of "niceness" that many women struggle with in the business world and resonates with smart women who are looking to take their career to the next level. The Myth of the Nice Girl was named Audible's Best Business Book of 2018 and one of Amazon's Best Business and Leadership Books of 2018. In this episode, Fran is going to show you specific tools you can use to:· Deliver difficult feedback· Create more time and space on your calendar· Stop being in reactive mode all day and get a lot more done· Know when you need to recalibrate your calendar to focus on what matters.Plus· Practical tips on turning down invitations or finding the sweet spot between yes and no· How to find the right mentor and nurture that relationship I hope you have a pen and paper ready or open up an email to yourself because you’re about to get some powerful ideas from this episode of Professional AF! Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Over the last 6 months my husband Jason and I have been on an intense journey of mental health and a lot of that growth has come as a result of both of us working with therapists on a regular basis. And of course when you are going through something, you can really see the value in it for lots of others. But in talking about therapy with friends, I’ve found that many found it an intimidating and overwhelming process. Even I have all kinds of questions about how therapy works, but it just doesn't feel right in the middle of a session. So this week I sat down with Lori Gottleib. She’s a psychotherapist and writes a weekly Dear Therapist Column for the Atlantic. Lori has written a number of New York Times Bestselling books which have been translated to 20 languages. Her latest book just came out on April 2, and it’s called Maybe You Should Talk to Someone. Lori is going to explain:- How therapists approach every session and what they are trying to accomplish- How therapists think about change and how that can help you take meaningful steps in your life- What they are scribbling back there in their notes as you’re talking- What you can learn about being a better listener and partner from how therapists approach their clients Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Self compassion is the simple art of being kind to yourself in moments of despair the way that you would for a good friend. But most of us are much kinder to our good friends than we are to ourselves. Today, I’m speaking with Dr. Kristin Neff. The top researcher for self compassion in the world. Kristin will help us understand:How self compassion can help you reduce anxiety, stress, negative head trash, and significantly increase your achievement. Why we are kinder to our good friends than we are to ourselves. Why self criticism is not a good way to motivate our selves and push ourselves to be better. Why self esteem is a fair weather fan and always turns on us when we need it most. And she will help answer the big myths of self compassion:That self compassion is a form of self pity.That self compassion means weakness. That self compassion will make you complacent. That self compassion is selfishSelf compassion has had a profound impact on the way my husband Jason and I live our lives and I hope you will give it a try after listening to this very special episode of Professional AF Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

One day soon, you may find yourself on the other end of woman to woman aggression, and the biological and social research this conversation highlights will help you understand exactly why it’s happening and more importantly – how to keep it from occurring in the first place. As you’ll hear quickly in the episode, I had a really difficult situation with a mentor in my very first professional job who I felt went behind my back. I was so confused when it happened and felt totally powerless in the situation. So I found this book, In The Company of Women, written by Dr. Susan Murphy. What a treat to get to find out from Susan: Why problems can arise among women when one of them is promotedHow to build relationships with female superiors, colleagues and those who report directly to youLeadership skills unique to womenThe language (verbal and nonverbal) that we use that can inflame female interactions Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

n this episode we're talking about charisma and influence. No matter what your job title, chances are, you’ve got to sell your ideas to others. And when you’re done with your presentation, no one is ever going to say to you that you weren’t charismatic enough; you didn’t command the room; or you weren’t compelling. So how would you ever know if this is a topic that’s holding you back? That’s what I wanted to learn. In this episode, I talk to John Neffinger, the author of Compelling People: The Hidden Qualities That Make Us Influential. John is going to share: What is executive presence and how do you make sure that you have it?How people make character judgments about you – that they really only consider 2 things whether they like and respect you.Why women are at a disadvantage in the way these two attributes are judged, and what they must do to be respected but not disliked.What you consciously and subconsciously communicate to others, andWhat strategies you can use to become more charismatic and influential Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

My guest is Jackie Huba, the author of Fiercely You: Be Fabulous and Confident by Thinking Like a Drag Queen. Jackie is going to tell us: • Why drag queens can teach women so much about confidence• The power of creating an alternate persona for business meetings• The nonverbal behaviors you might not be aware of that are demonstrating your power or lack there of• The psychological effects your clothes have on your performance• And what the heck is dragersizing and why is it so powerful Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Coming March 18th, Diana Kander interviews authors and thought leaders who have something to teach women about how to be more awesome at work. Diana acts like a guinea pig for each episode, trying the advice and instruction before each taping to report back on how well it worked for her. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.