Tent Talks Featuring: Billie Mandel
Tent Talks Featuring Billie Mandel: AITA – Tech Industry Edition: Top 5 mistakes well-meaning people are making RIGHT NOW in their jobs that make their workplaces more toxic, how to stop, and what to do instead On Wednesday, August 30th at 5:00pm Central, Billie Mandel joined us for a live Q&A session: “AITA: Tech Industry Edition – Top 5 mistakes well-meaning people are making RIGHT NOW in their jobs that make their workplaces more toxic, how to stop, and what to do instead.” Billie Mandel Billie Mandel is a multidisciplinary social scientist, leadership coach and team collaboration expert with 30 years’ international business experience leading software R&D teams to innovate, grow and create more effectively together. As a first-wave UXer and (often token) out lesbian leader, and now as a leadership and collaboration coach for women and feminist professionals and teams, she’s spent decades in your boardrooms watching you make the same mistakes over and over. Now that she’s a self-employed CEO, living her best life in her Sea Witch era, she’s fully empowered to tell all the tales and spill all the tea, for our collective amusement, benefit, and growth. Her company, Mandel Creative, is a queer feminist learning and development consultancy and innovation incubator for creative and technical professionals and teams, and has some spicy new programs coming up! Subscribe to her mailing list at www.billiemandel.com and follow her on LinkedIn to hear the news when it’s fresh and hot! About Tent Talks Chicago Camps hosts irregularly scheduled Tent Talks with people from all across the User Experience Design community, and beyond. Who really likes limits, anyway–If it’s a cool idea, we’d love to hear about it and share it! What is a Tent Talk? That’s a great question, we’d love to tell you. Tent Talks are short-form in nature, generally lasting from 10-20 minutes (ish) in a recorded format–we like to think of them as “S’mores-sized content” because that’s pretty on-brand. Tent Talks can be a presentation on a topic, a live Q&A session about the work we do, or the work around the work we do, or really just about anything–we don’t want to limit ourselves, or you. You should send along an idea or topic of your own so we can learn from you, as well! You don’t have to be a published author or a professional speaker on a circuit to be good at your job, so please, put yourself forward, and let’s have some fun, talk, and share your experience with others!
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Show Notes
Billie Mandel focuses on the well-intentioned yet harmful behaviors people exhibit in tech workplaces that contribute to toxicity. She outlines the top 5 such behaviors and offers tangible solutions for each, from avoiding complicit bystander tendencies to fostering transparent communication.
Top 5 Well-Meaning Behaviors That Create Toxic Work Environments
Complicit Bystander: Often rooted in people-pleasing or conflict avoidance, this behavior can have detrimental effects on teams and individuals.
Workplace Gossip: Though often unintentional, gossip can have a corrosive impact on work culture, especially in startups where roles and power structures are fluid.
Perfectionism: Aiming for flawlessness not only hampers individual growth but can also make leaders the "creativity ceiling" of their teams.
Lack of Role Clarity: A nebulous definition of roles and decision-making processes can lead to workplace stress and confusion.
Listening to Criticize: When people listen with the intent to appear smart, rather than to genuinely understand or connect, communication breaks down.
Deep Dive Into Perfectionism
- Perfectionism stifles authenticity and induces fear of failure, keeping team members from reaching their full potential.
- Leadership that enforces perfectionism can lead to employee attrition.
Effective Communication
Inviting Criticism: Leaders should use open-ended questions like "What am I missing?" to invite team input.
Counteracting Power Dynamics: To build a culture of transparency, leaders should model vulnerability and invite team members into their problem-solving processes.
Strategies for Navigating Complex Relationships
- Personal anecdotes from Billie illuminate the complexities of relationships that are both professional and personal. The key takeaway is to set clear boundaries and be acutely aware of the potential impact on your professional roles.
Approaching Difficult Conversations When You're the Problem
- Acknowledgment: The first step is admitting to the mistake.
- Framework: Use the "Situation, Behavior, Impact" model to discuss the issue.
- Actionable Steps: Sometimes an apology isn't enough, especially in DEI contexts. It's essential to take steps to do better.
Strategies for Inclusivity and Anti-Toxicity
- If you're privileged, use your platform to amplify underrepresented voices.
- Focus on continuous improvement, particularly through actions, rather than mere apologies.
Additional Insights from Billie Mandel
Leadership and Vulnerability: Inspired by Brene Brown, Billie recommends showing your own mistakes as a way to establish trust within the team.
Gossip Trap: Be cautious with who you vent to. Gossiping, especially to a boss, can be destructive.
Backstabbing Dilemma: When receiving feedback about someone, it's responsible to ask, "Have you talked to them about it?"
Recommended Reading and Resources
- "Mindset" by Carol Dweck
- Billie Mandel's coaching practices
Actionable Tips for Improvement
Set Boundaries: Clarify roles and boundaries, particularly in complex relationships.
Choose Vent Buddies Wisely: Keep professional and venting relationships separate.
Encourage Open Dialogue: Create an environment where team members can directly communicate with each other.
Be Cautious with Feedback: Redirect negative feedback to the concerned individual.
Acknowledge Mistakes and Learn: Take actionable steps to improve, particularly in DEI contexts.
Quotable Quotes
"Critique is 100% that for creative teams. The hardest thing to teach people, but the most valuable thing to teach people, is to crave that discomfort."
"Sometimes you've just got to forgive yourself but do better."
"I seek my own consent first. Somebody asks me to do something at work. Am I willing to do this thing with the amount of knowledge that I have and the amount of support that I have?"
About Tent Talks
Chicago Camps hosts irregularly scheduled Tent Talks with people from all across the User Experience Design community, and beyond. Who really likes limits, anyway--If it's a cool idea, we'd love to hear about it and share it!
What is a Tent Talk? That's a great question, we'd love to tell you.
Tent Talks are short-form in nature, generally lasting from 10-20 minutes (ish) in a recorded format--we like to think of them as "S'mores-sized content" because that's pretty on-brand. Tent Talks can be a presentation on a topic, a live Q&A session about the work we do, or the work around the work we do, or really just about anything--we don't want to limit ourselves, or you.
You should send along an idea or topic of your own so we can learn from you, as well! You don't have to be a published author or a professional speaker on a circuit to be good at your job, so please, put yourself forward, and let's have some fun, talk, and share your experience with others!
About The Feed & The Thread
The Feed & The Thread is a daily summary of UX articles found in the industry and some light-touch updates from the UX Community found in online forums. It's brief, and meant as a light-touch overview of what's happening across UX.