Stoic Coffee Break

As human beings, we have an amazing gift - the ability to be conscious of our own thinking. How are you taking advantage of this gift? When we are unaware of the thoughts running through our head, we are relinquishing control of our mind to the old habits and patterns that we have created in our lives and letting ourselves run on autopilot.“The happiness of your life depends upon the quality of your thoughts: therefore, guard accordingly, and take care that you entertain no notions unsuitable to virtue and reasonable nature.”― Marcus Aurelius, MeditationsMarcus Aurelius is teaching us here that when we spend our time on thoughts that don’t help us on our path to virtue, we are making ourselves unhappy. The stoics remind us over and over that we are in control of the thoughts we entertain and those thoughts lead to our choices, which lead to the outcomes of our lives.From the moment we wake till the time we fall asleep, our minds are constantly churning through thoughts. Much of this thinking is just everyday thoughts to get through the day such as what to have for breakfast or what clothes to wear. Some are more life-changing such as whether to ask out that person we’re interested in, or what career options to pursue. But many of the thoughts we have are ones that go partly or even completely unnoticed, just buzzing in the background. Maybe we're annoyed by a snarky comment from our partner earlier in the day. Maybe we're worried about something we overheard from our co-workers gossiping. Often, we ruminate on thoughts about things we can't control, and we don’t even notice it.The thoughts we entertain are a key part of the process of creating the life we want. Our thoughts are what create our emotions around the events and people in our lives. They help create the impetus to action, and better actions lead to better results. When we use our reason, rather than our default reactions, we are able to find patterns of thinking that are not helpful, and replace them with better patterns, that helps us to see the world from a more useful perspective.And the reverse is true. When we make judgments, and focus on thoughts about how crappy life is, then the kind of life we’re going to create is one of negativity and unhappiness. For example, if I sit and think about how someone has wronged me and they owe me an apology, or if I focus on something that happened that I think is unfair and I wish it would change, I’m focusing on things that I can’t control. I’m painting a picture of the world that is negative and one where I’m powerless.How would using your ability to observe and notice what thoughts you are thinking, change your life? What kind of thought patterns could you change that aren’t serving you? When we slow down, and take that time, we can see if the thoughts that we think benefit us, or if they are a hinderance. With more conscious awareness, we can make active choices, rather than simply letting our minds run amok.“Nothing, to my way of thinking, is a better proof of a well-ordered mind than a man’s ability to stop just where he is and pass some time in his own company.”― SenecaThe first part of gaining some more control over our thinking is to limit distractions. We have so many things distracting us in our lives. We try to multitask at work with dozens of tab open in our web browsers, and emails filling up our boxes, vying for our attention. We carry around a lethal weapon of mass distraction in our pockets. With our phones connected to everything on the planet at all times, it’s so easy to find ourselves perpetually entertained. How would your life change if, when you have a few minutes to yourself, rather than reaching for your phone you took the time to be bored, and to just sit and think?As an example in my own life, for about two months I was playing a poker game on my phone. At first, it was fun, and a bit exciting as I played against an AI and got the feel for the game and improved my skill. I would get that little burst of dopamine every time I pulled off a great hand or a great bluff. But after a while, I began to notice that I was reaching for my phone and opening the game any time I had a few minutes to spare. Often, those few minutes would turn into 30 or 60 minutes to finish a game. I would play it when my partner was talking to me, giving her less than my full attention. I realized that it was not serving me, so I deleted it off my phone. Strangely, I felt some apprehension in doing so, and while I’m glad I did I noticed throughout the last week that I would reach from my phone and start to scroll to the game when I had some free moments. I would catch myself and instead open a book or just pause and think about how I had become a bit of an addict to that game.The next part of gaining some control over our thinking is to be aware of our thinking. Meditation is all about this idea of being aware of the thoughts floating through your mind. I know that some people think that meditation is abo

Why do we feel a sense of injury when disagrees with us? Why do we feel hurt when someone tells us we are wrong? In this week’s episode, we’re going to talk why were worry so much about what others think of us and how to learn to deal with our ego.“Reject your sense of injury and the injury itself disappears.”― Marcus Aurelius“Sticks and stones may break my bones, but words will never hurt me.”— AnonymousOne of the aspect of stoicism that has been most difficult for me has been learning to not let the opinions of other affect me. I don’t that I’m alone in this. I think most people, struggle with this aspect of life. So why is that? Why do we worry about what others think of us?We are social animals so we naturally crave the approval and acceptance of other people. Working together is how our species not only survived, but have been able to dominate this planet.The media, especially fashion magazines make their living off selling others the latest hot trend of what will make others like and admire you.Social media has capitalized on this need to feel the approval of others. We get that burst of pleasure when others like our post or leave a comment. We get a thrill when our tweet gets retweeted by a celebrity. And on the flipside, if we are mocked or become the butt of someone’s joke it can be crushing.The society we grew up in or currently live in has a big impact as well. I grew up in a very religious community, where there were very rigid expectations of how I was supposed to behave and the things that I should want and do in my life. I was strongly judge by how well I lived up to the principles laid out by the church elders, and I remember so much of my early life feeling like I was simply a failure as a person because I could never live up to these unreachable standards. I was basically trained to seek the judgements of others.Even with all that said, why does it hurt when someone insults us?I think that it comes from a threat to our ego. So what is the ego, and why does it feel “bruised” when someone puts us down or doesn’t like us?The ego is often described as our identity or self concept. It is that part of us that see us as something separate from everything else around us. It is the thing that is ‘us’ and not the ‘other’.And this sense of identity is a combination of our memories, our ideas about who we are, and ideas about who we want to become.Part of how we develop a sense of self is how we are seen by others. If there is no one else around us, how would we know if we are selfish? If we are rude? If we are funny? If we are likeable? All of these aspects of our ‘self’ are dependent on how others view us.When we have a healthy ego, a healthy sense of self, we are able to look at what others say as simply their opinion. We can look at it as simply information, and we can decide what to do with it.When we have an unhealthy ego, when someone doesn’t like us, our sense of identity can feel threatened. When someone criticizes us, we feel like they are telling us that what we have done, or what we think is wrong, and therefore there is something wrong with us. Rather than being able to look at what others say as their opinion, and something to consider, we may fall apart. We may get angry and fight back. The first reaction is becoming a victim. The second is trying to control someone other than ourselves.Marcus Aurelius was the most powerful man in the world when he was emperor of Rome. But even as emperor, had to remind himself that when someone said something disparaging that it was his own mind that gave meaning to what was said about him. He gives us some really good advice on how to deal with those that we feel are trying to injure us.“When people injure you, ask yourself what good or harm they thought would come of it. If you understand that, you'll feel sympathy rather than outrage or anger. Your sense of good and evil may be the same as theirs, or near it, in which case you have to excuse them. Or your sense of good and evil may differ from theirs. In which case they're misguided and deserve your compassion. Is that so hard?”― Marcus AureliusWhat Marcus is telling is that usually, others are not trying to harm you. They are trying to do what they think is right. So the first thing we should do is be curious. Why are they doing or saying this? What kind of outcome were they hoping for? If you can be curious, If you can ask questions, if you can try to understand, you can have sympathy.He goes on to say that they may have the same value system as you, and it’s very possible they may be right. If so, then that’s information you can use. If they aren’t, you can simply take what they said as information and do nothing with it.You may find that they have a very different value system than you, so they may be very misguided in their criticism, and therefore deserve your compassion.Now I know this is not easy. I struggle with this a lot. Even today, my partner was frustrated with me about my lack of comm

I’ve been thinking a lot about motivation and how we accomplish the goals that we set out to do. And I think there’s a bit a confusion about motivation and how it helps us get things done. Let’s take a look at the definition of motivation:The state or condition of being motivated or having a strong reason to act or accomplish somethingAnd let’s look at the definition of willpower:Control of one's impulses and actions; self-control.Motivation is the reason why you want to do something. It’s the fuel that gets going. It is not the thing that actually propels you. The engine that actually gets you to do something is willpower.Willpower is “like a muscle that can be strengthened with use, but it also gets fatigued with use,” says John Tierney, co-author of Willpower, with Roy F. Baumeister. If you simply rely on willpower to get you to do something, it’s going to take a lot of effort. According to the authors, the best way to reduce willpower fatigue is to turn something into a habit or a routine, which takes a lot less willpower.Just Do It“First say to yourself what you would be; and then do what you have to do.”– EpictetusSometimes we wait until we “feel” like doing it. The problem is, we may never feel like it. Usually, the motivation to do something comes after we get started. The hardest part about working out at the gym is often just getting yourself to go to the gym. The hardest part about writing is just sitting down and getting started. If you can eliminate the barriers to getting started, then your chance of success is far greater than waiting for inspiration.ControlOne the most important factors though is what Epictetus reminds us:“To make the best of what is in our power, and take the rest as it occurs.”– EpictetusSometimes, we attach some kind of negative emotion to the task we’re trying to accomplish. The task may feel overwhelming, or just plain scary. We may be too focused on wanting a specific outcome and we’re afraid that we won’t be able to do it. By focusing on the things that we can control, then we can focus our time and energy on something that will actually have some impact, and not waste our time on things we can’t controlDistractionsMost people who are successful create a process for accomplishing what they want. They figure out what they have control over, then put down the steps to accomplish their task, and then they follow those steps every time. They create an environment where it’s easy for them to fall into that routine, and where there are limited distractions.Marcus Aurelius said,“If you are distressed by anything external, the pain is not due to the thing itself, but to your estimate of it; and this you have the power to revoke at any moment.”If there is something that is distracting you, if it is something within your control, you find ways to either take care of it right then or plan time to take care of it later. If it is something you can’t control, you let go of it.For example, Stephen King sits down and writes 10 pages every day. He doesn’t care if they are good. He writes 10 pages while listening to the same Metallica album at a little desk in his office. He doesn’t wait to feel motivated. He removes all distractions and just does the task he set out for himself in his routine, and he does it every day.Create Your PlanYou can start off by asking yourself some questions (I’d suggest writing the answers down):What are the things that I can control?What are the steps that I need to take?What are the tools I need to accomplish it?What are the obstacles in my way?Are there other potential obstacles that I can think of?What steps can I take to work through those obstacles?What can I do to create an environment that eliminates distractions and helps me focus?Once you have those questions answered, you have the start of your plan. Create an environment that is most conducive to helping you accomplish the tasks. The next thing is to just start doing it. Often times, this is the hardest part. If you wait until you “feel” motivated, you probably won’t. Just do it for 3 minutes then quit if you want. You can do just about anything for 3 minutes, and usually, once you get started doing something, it’s easier to keep that momentum going, and you usually feel even more motivated to keep doing it.Remember, a routine will beat relying on motivation and willpower any day.---Hello friends! Thanks for listening. Want to take these principles to the next level? Join the Stoic Coffee House Community!  Stop by the website at stoic.coffee where you can sign up for our newsletter, and buy some great looking shirts and hoodies at the Stoic Coffee Shop. Like the theme song? You can find it here from my alter ego. :)Find me on instagram, twitter, or threadsLastly if you know of someone that would benefit from or appreciate this podcast, please share it. Word of mouth is the best way to help this podcast grow. Thanks again for listening. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more informa

“Circumstances don’t make the man, they only reveal him to himself.”– EpictetusHow do we deal with difficulties? Do we see them as challenges or opportunities? As something that is to be suffered through, or something that teaches us who we are? In today's episode, we're going to talk about difficult circumstances and how they are the things we should be most grateful for.Show Notes:What does that mean? Aren’t tough challenges supposed to make us stronger?The stoics remind us that circumstances in and of themselves are neutral. They are not good or bad unless we label it so. It’s our thinking about a situation that makes it a problem - or an opportunity.The same thing can happen to two different people and one person may see it as an intractable problem, something to complain about or run and hide from. The other can see it as an opportunity to learn and grow, and they dig in and push through.It’s often hard to prepare for challenges because we get comfortable when things are going well. We like it when things are easy. Professional and personal failures, divorce, even death rarely come at opportune moments. More often than not, they come unexpectedly out of the blue, when we feel least ready.The author Elizabeth Day in this month’s Guardian wrote a great piece on failure. Reflecting on what she thought of as the greatest failures in her life, she said, “I realised that the biggest, most transformative moments of my life came through crisis or failure. They came when I least expected them, when I felt ill-equipped to deal with the fallout. And yet each time, I had survived.”Sometimes, we come out the other side not feeling like a champ. We may just survive it. And that’s okay.Challenges also have a way of humbling us and knocking down our egos.Our view of who we thought we were can change when seen through the filter of life’s challenges. We can be so wrapped up in something outside of ourselves, that when that identity is threatened, it can be exceptionally scary.Challenges can change us into a totally new person. Day goes on to say, “Life crises have a way of doing that: they strip you of your old certainties and throw you into chaos. The only way to survive is to surrender to the process. When you emerge, blinking into the light, you have to rebuild what you thought you knew about yourself.”If we link our identity too strongly to our jobs and suddenly find ourselves unemployed, the blow to our self-image can be devastating. We can give our heart and soul to a relationship only have it end bitterly and leaving us feeling jaded. We can work for years on a creative endeavor only to meet rejection and failure and question whether it was worth our time and energy.But it is through these transitions that we are able to let go of that old version of us, and become who we are meant to be.It’s not easy to shift your mindset to view challenges as opportunities.It takes practice to change our instinctual reactions.It can be difficult to sit with the uncomfortable emotions such as fear and doubt that our thinking brings up. And this is where learning how to view a challenge differently helps. We are able to see how this thing is helping us, rather than looking at it as something to fear.Maybe it’s giving us an opportunity to learn a new skill.Maybe it’s giving us an opportunity to grow stronger in an area we shied away from before.Maybe it’s an opportunity to start something new.Many startups happen because someone ran into a challenge and looking around they either didn’t find a solution or didn’t like the existing ones, so they created their own solution.Have you ever been on the beach and picked up a smooth stone? Have you ever thought about how it got so smooth? That stone in your hand started off as a hunk of stone, with sharp edges and rough patches all over. As the waves wash the stone up on shore it bangs up against other stones, sand, and stone walls up on the shore. And as it comes in contact with these, the sharp edges become rounded, the rough patches begin to be smoothed out.Life is going to throw stuff as whether we like it or not. We can learn to marvel at the changes and embrace the hard things that help us grow into someone new. We can learn to let go of holding to who we are and be excited for who we’re becoming. We can learn, as the stoics ask us, to love our fate.Help support this podcast at patreon!https://stoic.coffee---Hello friends! Thanks for listening. Want to take these principles to the next level? Join the Stoic Coffee House Community!  Stop by the website at stoic.coffee where you can sign up for our newsletter, and buy some great looking shirts and hoodies at the Stoic Coffee Shop. Like the theme song? You can find it here from my alter ego. :)Find me on instagram, twitter, or threadsLastly if you know of someone that would benefit from or appreciate this podcast, please share it. Word of mouth is the best way to help this podcast grow. Thanks again for listening. Hosted on Acast.

Show Notes:How many times have we made judgments about someone when we first meet them, that later turn out to be completely wrong?“Impressions, striking a person’s mind as soon as he perceives something within range of his senses, are not voluntary or subject to his will, they impose themselves on people’s attention almost with a will of their own. But the act of assent which endorses these impressions is voluntary and a function of the human will.”– EpictetusWe are constantly being bombarded by strong impressions, and making snap judgments.We’re constantly creating unconscious judgments about things and people.We compare ourselves to others - our friends, or neighbors, our family members.We see someone we’re attracted to and we make all kinds of judgments about what kind of person we think they might be. They’re pretty so they must be smart...or dumb.We see someone that is maybe less attractive, or disheveled and we make judgments about them. Maybe we think they are lazy.We judge people by their clothes, by their skin color, by their accents when they talk, their voice, how much money they have.The thing is that judgments in and of themselves aren’t bad. We need to size things up. But we need to be sure that we’re making judgments that serve us and the people around us.“You always own the option of having no opinion. There is never any need to get worked up or to trouble your soul about things you can’t control. These things are not asking to be judged by you. Leave them alone.”– Marcus AureliusDoes this thing really need our attention? Was what some celebrity scandal worth our focus? Does it matter if that person walking down the street from us has tattoos or a mohawk or is wearing a suit and tie?And the thing about judgments is that we need to be conscious of what we’re comparing. If you’re comparing yourself to someone else and saying that you’re a better than they are for some reason, then it really doesn’t serve either of you.And who’s to say that you’re better than they are?What works for you, doesn’t work for them.The path they are on is not yours, so what you deem as important doesn’t mean shit to them.What you want and what they want are not going to be the same.So why do we make so many unconscious judgments about things?Our brain likes to create shortcuts and so it sees patterns that it likes that it thinks are safe so it creates a shorthand to help it make quick decisions, to keep you safe, and save mental energy.The other thing to think about is where are these judgments coming from?Are they yours? Are they ones that were given to you growing up? From your family? From society? The media?These mental models that you hold onto and use to try and make sense of the world need to be examined all the time because they may not be serving you.And changing those models is not easy. Sometimes we’re simply not even aware of them.Racism is something that’s passed down or part of the culture that you grew up in.And so many of these judgments are part of your identity. They are the things that are part of your ego. They are ways for you to feel secure in who you are. If you’re “better” than that person, then you feel good about yourself. You feel okay. But if you have to feel good about yourself that way, then it’s probably not a very healthy way of living.The other big area that I want to address is self-judgment.We spend so much time judging ourselves and all the ways that we don’t measure up.And where do these self-judgments come from?I think they usually come from outside of us. From our culture. From our families.We have these expectations of what we “should be”, and rather than learning to accept and who we actually are.When we learn to stop the self judgments and just be okay with who we are, and stop having so many expectations about things we really learn to lighten up and go easier on ourselves.And when we are easier on ourselves, we are less judgmental of others.I know that much of the anger that I’ve struggled with is from expecting things to be a certain way, and when they weren’t I would get upset about the uncomfortable emotions and try to use my anger to control the outcome of the situation.This usually has the effect of causing even more distress and angst with the whole situation and making it much worse than it was in the first place.When we let go of expectations, it's like learning to step into the flow of things. We can roll with things because we don’t have any preconceived idea of what should be, but we simply work with what is.In Zen, this is the beginner’s mind.How do we suspend our judgments of others?How do we suspend judgments of ourselves?“We are not privy to the stories behind people’s actions, so we should be patient with others and suspend judgement of them, recognizing the limits of our understanding.”– EpictetusWe can let go of thinking of things as either right or wrong.We can become curious as to why something is the way it is.Why does that person wear those clothes?Wh

“Putting things off is the biggest waste of life: it snatches away each day as it comes, and denies us the present by promising the future. The greatest obstacle to living is expectancy, which hangs upon tomorrow, and loses today. You are arranging what lies in Fortune's control, and abandoning what lies in yours. What are you looking at? To what goal are you straining? The whole future lies in uncertainty: live immediately.”– SenecaDo you think too much about the future that you are not living in today?This quote from Seneca hits two really great points of the Stoics.Momento Mori, remember you will die, and because we could die at any moment, there really is no other time than now. There is now and not now.Amor Fati, love your fate. Because we have so little control over what happens to us in life, worrying about the future is worrying about something that may never happen.So when you think about it, the only thing you have control over is your choices at this moment.Many of the great philosophies and religions focus on mindfulness, of being in the present moment.What does mindfulness mean exactly? What does it mean to live in the now?To me it mean bringing my focus, my attention, my awareness to the present moment. To be fully engaged in my life, and not stuck thinking about how great things are going to be in the future, but to be present and involved with what’s going on around me and the work that I am engaged in.To be honest, I do get very stuck in the future. I think about all these great things that I want to do and create, or how much better it’s going to be....tomorrow or the next day or next week, and pretty soon, it’s next week and I didn’t get done what I wanted and I didn’t enjoy the things that happened.It takes effort to keep myself in the present and not get stuck thinking about the future. It’s a lifelong habit that I’ve built up and it’s not easy to break. But I have found that being more present and more focused on the moment, things seem more vivid and intense, it a good way. It’s like I’m more awake to the world. For example when I go on a walk in the wood near my house, if I’m making an effort to notice more of the world around me, the woods seem more colorful and the smells more sharp. It’s the difference between being half asleep and fully awake.Growing up, we’re often too focused on what life will be like in the future. When we’re in grade school we want to be in middle school. Middle school we want high school. Then off to college, career, family.And the thing is, whatever our future holds, it’s all going to happen anyway, so why not focus on enjoying today?Have you ever seen the painting A Sunday Afternoon on the Island of La Grande Jatte by Georges-Pierre Seurat? For those of your who’ve seen Ferris Bueller’s Day Off, it’s the painting that they stare at in the Art Institute of Chicago. It’s an amazing work of art that is made up of tiny points of unmixed paint. By doing so, your eye fuses the colors together to create the end color. So to create purple, Seurat would paint red dots next to blue dots until the eye saw purple. Seurat focused daily, deliberately putting each individual brushstroke to canvas, focusing on each small section to bring out the colors he wanted, until 2 years later the 10 foot painting was complete.Creating a life is the same way. If we take the time to lovingly and deliberately focus on and live in each day, in this present moment, then we have a great life each and every day. We never have a bad day.There’s a great quote by Steven Chandler in his book The Time Warrior. “Don’t create your year, create your day. Figure out the perfect day and then live it. The year will take care of itself. So will your life.”What can you do to create your perfect day?I think choosing what are the most important things for today, and then doing them with care, and focus. Let go of what you’ll do tomorrow. Tomorrow doesn’t yet exist, so is not real. Now is real, and now is the only time that you can do anything with.Don’t be busy, be effective. Are you doing something that matters or are you wasting time?Do it well. Don’t half-ass your way through something. Do it with care and focus and in a way that makes you proud.What can you do to keep yourself in the present moment?Slow down. This is one of the hardest things for me to do. But it takes time to live deliberately. We get too caught up in finishing, that we forget to enjoy the creating or the doing.Stop. Sometimes just stop and breath from time to time and look around and see the world, to be thankful. I know some people set reminders so they take time to re-center themselves.Write it down. For me, one of the most effective things I do is to get all the things in the future out of my head. I write them down so they don’t spin around in my head. I take care of it now, or I choose a time in the future to take care of it. When I do that, when I get it off my mind, it frees up brain cycles for more important things. When I

“Tentative efforts lead to tentative outcomes. Therefore, give yourself fully to your endeavors. Decide to construct your character through excellent actions and determine to pay the price of a worthy goal. The trials you encounter will introduce you to your strengths. Remain steadfast...and one day you will build something that endures: something worthy of your potential.”― EpictetusShow Notes:One of most important habits to cultivate is a strong work ethic.Time and dedicated effort make it more fulfilling.There’s a saying: “How you do one thing is how you do everything.”Often, trying to take shortcuts, we’re often wasting more time going back to fix what wasn’t done well, than if we’d just done it right in the first place.Sometimes, best shortcut is to do good work.And if you’re going to put effort into something, why half ass your way through it? That’s wasted time.If we’re always looking for the easy way, then we may miss out on a more difficult path that has a greater reward.Hard work makes us to get stronger.We’ll never climb a great mountain if we’re only climbing hills.If you’re running a marathon, and you take shortcut and make it to the finish line, then you really didn’t run a marathon.Getting to the finish line and completing the race are two different things.While it’s great to get to the end, how we got there is more important than getting there.And why are we always so focused on getting to the end?When we get to the end, that means the journey is over.It’s the journey, it’s doing the work, it’s the process that’s important.If we’re making only tentative efforts, then we never achieve that mastery which allows to excel at something.Whether we’re building a business, composing music, or writing a book, or training for a marathon, we should dedicate ourselves to our work.And we you achieve that mastery, you’ll be in place where you can create something that endures, something that’s worthy of your potential.---Hello friends! Thanks for listening. Want to take these principles to the next level? Join the Stoic Coffee House Community!  Stop by the website at stoic.coffee where you can sign up for our newsletter, and buy some great looking shirts and hoodies at the Stoic Coffee Shop. Like the theme song? You can find it here from my alter ego. :)Find me on instagram, twitter, or threadsLastly if you know of someone that would benefit from or appreciate this podcast, please share it. Word of mouth is the best way to help this podcast grow. Thanks again for listening. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

“The honest and good man ought to be exactly like a man who smells strong, so that the bystander, as soon as he comes near him, must smell him whether he chooses or not.”― Marcus AureliusShow Notes:This quote cracked me up.And even though Marcus Aurelius was the Emperor of Rome, I like that fact that he had a sense of humor.His example is a potent reminder that we shouldn’t have to tell people how good we are, they should just notice.Because if someone has to tell people how good a person they are, then they probably aren’t.It’s like when someone says, “Trust me.” The fact that they had to say that now makes me wonder if there is something that I shouldn’t trust about them.It should simply be part of our essence.And while he was being humorous here, we as humans use our senses all the time when we meet other people.Often when we meet someone, we get a certain feeling or “vibe” from someone.We call it a gut feeling or instinct, and while it’s not always right, more times than not, we’re on the scent, and I’ve found that it’s a pretty indicator of the character of a person.And when others meet you, what is their impression of you?Do you reek with integrity?Does your character stink with goodness?Let the scent of your character make a lasting impression.---Hello friends! Thanks for listening. Want to take these principles to the next level? Join the Stoic Coffee House Community!  Stop by the website at stoic.coffee where you can sign up for our newsletter, and buy some great looking shirts and hoodies at the Stoic Coffee Shop. Like the theme song? You can find it here from my alter ego. :)Find me on instagram, twitter, or threadsLastly if you know of someone that would benefit from or appreciate this podcast, please share it. Word of mouth is the best way to help this podcast grow. Thanks again for listening. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

“You must know that it is no easy thing for a principle to become a man's own, unless each day he maintain it and hear it maintained, as well as work it out in life.”– EpictetusShow Notes:How often do we hear something, think that we understand it, but yet it still takes us quite a while to make it a part of our daily life?Change is not easy.Studies show that it takes 3-6 weeks for a habit to become ingrained, depending on the complexity of the habit.It also depends on if you are trying create a new habit or replace an existing habit.And that’s just for a single habit done daily.How much information do you get in your life that you want to implement?How many things are there that distract you from your habit?If we want something to become a habit, I’ve found that it’s best to focus on one thing.Work on it until you don’t have to think about it.Then move on the next thing, and repeat.If you want to exercise, do it every day, even if you don’t do it well.If you want to be less angry, first pay attention to your mood.Just getting it done each day is more important than the quality.Creating this podcast for me was first about getting it done each day.Then, once the routine was created, I was able to focus on the quality.Is there a principle or a habit that you want to improve in in your life?What can you do today to move you little closer to creating that habit?Focus on the hardest part - creating the habit.Worry about the quality later.Soon you’ll have a shiny new habit.And then you can start on the next one.---Hello friends! Thanks for listening. Want to take these principles to the next level? Join the Stoic Coffee House Community!  Stop by the website at stoic.coffee where you can sign up for our newsletter, and buy some great looking shirts and hoodies at the Stoic Coffee Shop. Like the theme song? You can find it here from my alter ego. :)Find me on instagram, twitter, or threadsLastly if you know of someone that would benefit from or appreciate this podcast, please share it. Word of mouth is the best way to help this podcast grow. Thanks again for listening. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

“He is a wise man who does not grieve for the things which he has not, but rejoices for those which he has. ”― EpictetusShow Notes:If you were to sit down and write a list of all the things that you want in your life, what would be on that list?Maybe a new house, a new car, new clothes?Would the things that you already have be on the list of things you want?One of the core tenets of Stoicism being grateful for the things that we already have.Because if you can want what you already have, you’ve already found a way to bump up your happiness.One of the facets of modern day marketing is that if there is not a natural market for what you are selling, then they work to create demand for products.Marketing works hard to make you feel like you are missing out, then offer you the solution to fix whatever ails you.That if we only we had the newest, shiniest, new thing, then we could feel happy.And it’s not to say that all marketing is bad. Marketing also lets us know about things that we may be truly interested in.And it’s not always easy when there are messages email, ads, and tv that try to persuade us that we are missing out and that the key to fulfillment is just a credit card transaction away.And then when you throw social media on top of our lives, we start to compare our lives to other people’s highlight reel.And soon we can find ourselves perpetually unhappy with wanting things that we don’t need.I know that I’ve fallen for this.At times in my life when I’ve gone shopping because I’m unhappy or bored.The things that I’m grateful for?My partner and the great relationship that we have.My kids and the good people that they are, and the amazing people they’re becoming.And that we’re all pretty healthy.For my awesome friends that make up my tribe.That I have a comfortable home and a good job to take care of those that I love.Taking those moments to appreciate what you already have, and to think to yourself about how fortunate you are, is a cheap way to brighten your day.---Hello friends! Thanks for listening. Want to take these principles to the next level? Join the Stoic Coffee House Community!  Stop by the website at stoic.coffee where you can sign up for our newsletter, and buy some great looking shirts and hoodies at the Stoic Coffee Shop. Like the theme song? You can find it here from my alter ego. :)Find me on instagram, twitter, or threadsLastly if you know of someone that would benefit from or appreciate this podcast, please share it. Word of mouth is the best way to help this podcast grow. Thanks again for listening. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

“Very little is needed for everything to be upset and ruined, only a slight lapse in reason. it’s much easier for a mariner to wreck his ship than it is for him to keep it sailing safely; all he has to do is head a little more upwind and disaster is instantaneous. In fact, he does not have to do anything: a momentary loss of attention will produce the same result. It’s much the same in our case. If you doze off, all your progress up to that point will be negated. To keep a sharp eye on your impressions, and never fall asleep. It is no small thing that is being watched over, it equates”— EpictetusShow Notes:As we work to become better humans, we need to remember that it takes constant attention.We need to make sure that we are finding ways to apply these principles consistently in our lives.And it’s not easy. Our natural inclination is to be a bit lazy.We don’t always want to put into practice what we’ve learned because it takes consistent effort.I’ve talked about dealing with anger in my life, and reaching a point where I can deal with things more rationally more consistently.So when I read this quote it really felt applicable.There would be times when I’d go for a decent period of not letting my anger get the best of me, then I’d get a little tired or grumpy or frustrated, and fall right back into the same old behavior.I don’t expect to be perfect, but it felt like I was undoing all the progress I had made.Working on the things that will help us become better people is something that needs our attention all the time.Consistent application of principles, ingrains them into our characterJust because we because we’ve done well with integrating good practices in principles isn’t our lives doesn’t mean that we can simply rest on our laurels.I think it’s also a bit like fitness. We don’t just build up some muscle and then we never have to work on it again.Consistency and attention helps strengthen our character, and keeps us sailing smoothly.Even a good captain can sail his ship all the way to shore, only to end up on the rocks from careless inattention.---Hello friends! Thanks for listening. Want to take these principles to the next level? Join the Stoic Coffee House Community!  Stop by the website at stoic.coffee where you can sign up for our newsletter, and buy some great looking shirts and hoodies at the Stoic Coffee Shop. Like the theme song? You can find it here from my alter ego. :)Find me on instagram, twitter, or threadsLastly if you know of someone that would benefit from or appreciate this podcast, please share it. Word of mouth is the best way to help this podcast grow. Thanks again for listening. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

“How ridiculous and unrealistic is the man who is astonished at anything that happens in life.”― Marcus Aurelius, Meditations Book 12Show Notes:How often do we think that something in life shouldn’t happen to us?As if we are somehow immune to the things that happen to anyone else in life.How often do we think that we are owed something?As if we are somehow privileged above others, that we deserve somethingWe may think it’s unfair when something we worked hard for fails to materialize.We may think it’s unfair that someone we love gets cancer, that they didn’t deserve it.We may think we deserve a perfect partner because go to the gym workout and wear nice clothes.The world is full of all kinds of stories about people getting hit with the unexpected and didn’t get what they wanted.Who determines what is fair and unfair?So much in our lives that is simply up to chance, where we have no control over it.We never deserve anything.Now this doesn’t mean that all is lost.Let go of trying to control the things that we can’t control, and focus on what we can.We cannot control the circumstances that happen to us.We cannot control the outcome.What we can control is how we respond to the things that happen to us.If we are diagnosed with an serious illness, we can’t control that it happened to us.We can’t control whether we’ll recover from it.If we follow the prescriptions of our doctor, we increase our probability of a positive outcome.We may not get the job we think we deserve. But we can increase the probability that we’ll get a good job if we put the work in.We can also choose our attitude towards towards our situation. We can be angry, we can be sad, we can react in many different ways.We’re going to have deal with it anyway, so if we can approach it in the most helpful way we can, we reduce our overall suffering.I think that most suffering in the world happens when we try to control the things that we can’t and fail to control what we can.Life is full of surprises, but it shouldn’t be.---Hello friends! Thanks for listening. Want to take these principles to the next level? Join the Stoic Coffee House Community!  Stop by the website at stoic.coffee where you can sign up for our newsletter, and buy some great looking shirts and hoodies at the Stoic Coffee Shop. Like the theme song? You can find it here from my alter ego. :)Find me on instagram, twitter, or threadsLastly if you know of someone that would benefit from or appreciate this podcast, please share it. Word of mouth is the best way to help this podcast grow. Thanks again for listening. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

“First learn the meaning of what you say, and then speak.” ― EpictetusShow Notes:Have you ever been around someone that uses words they don’t understand?How many times have you said something, then had to say, “Well, what I really meant was….”?What if we took time to make sure that we were saying what we really meant?How many arguments could be cut short if we stopped, thought about what we wanted and what we were trying to convey, and clearly expressed what we really meant or felt?How many flame wars on facebook could be avoided if we took time to be sure that what we say is really what we mean?The specificity of language is something that is really important.Because everyone gives meaning to the things that are said, things are easily misinterpreted or twisted by emotion in the moment.The more clear that we can be from the outset, the better our communication will be.And while this quote talks about making sure that are clear about what we say, I think we also need to be sure that we are saying what we really mean. Is this something that I really think or feel or am I just saying something that I think the other person wants to hear?Maybe what we want to say doesn’t really even need to be said at all.In this fast paced world we too often speak before we think.Have you ever been around someone that was so busy talking and loved the sound of their own voice so much, that they were just filling the space and saying all kinds of things that they don’t really mean.What is it about silence that makes people uncomfortable?We often feel that if we’re silent then someone will think we’re boring.I know that I’ve often felt this way, that I needed to keep the conversation going for whatever reason.But what I’ve learned is that if you can sit quietly with someone and have a comfortable silence with them, you have reached a pretty good point in a relationship.And no, sitting watching Netflix doesn’t count.I would encourage you to slow down, think about what you are really trying to say, find the right words, and then say it. Or not.Because sometimes….silence is golden.---Hello friends! Thanks for listening. Want to take these principles to the next level? Join the Stoic Coffee House Community!  Stop by the website at stoic.coffee where you can sign up for our newsletter, and buy some great looking shirts and hoodies at the Stoic Coffee Shop. Like the theme song? You can find it here from my alter ego. :)Find me on instagram, twitter, or threadsLastly if you know of someone that would benefit from or appreciate this podcast, please share it. Word of mouth is the best way to help this podcast grow. Thanks again for listening. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

“He suffers more than necessary, who suffers before it is necessary.”― SenecaShow Notes:How often have you stressed over something or worried yourself sick, only to have the scenario you were so worried about never happen?When you worry about something, and you let your imagination run with something, then you suffer many times before you even get to the event that might happen.Unless you can know the future, worrying about something is inventing problems that may never happen.And that kind of suffering is something that we can all probably do without.I’ve talked about this topic on the show before, but I think it’s important to go over these principles many times because we always need a reminder.And the Stoics understood that we as humans have wild imaginations and that we can come with all possible things that can go wrong.And while at times this can be useful with the idea of hoping for the best but preparing for the worst, we need to be sure that when we do imagine the worst that we aren’t wed to the outcome.Because it’s worrying too much about the outcome that we want that causes us to suffer.As the Buddhists would say, we’re suffering because of our attachment to something outside of our control.And because the role of chance and randomness on our lives that can influence the outcome to most things, we have little control over the outcome.What we do have control over is ourselves.We have control over our thinking.Our actions.We can focus on making good decisions.We can focus on doing good work.We can focus on the process.We do what we can do, and learn to be okay with whatever happens, knowing that we put effort into the things that we could influence.When we do these things, we let the chips fall where they may, continue on.The next time you find yourself worrying about something, ask yourself, “Am I focusing on the outcome, or am I working on the process?”---Hello friends! Thanks for listening. Want to take these principles to the next level? Join the Stoic Coffee House Community!  Stop by the website at stoic.coffee where you can sign up for our newsletter, and buy some great looking shirts and hoodies at the Stoic Coffee Shop. Like the theme song? You can find it here from my alter ego. :)Find me on instagram, twitter, or threadsLastly if you know of someone that would benefit from or appreciate this podcast, please share it. Word of mouth is the best way to help this podcast grow. Thanks again for listening. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

“Everything we hear is an opinion, not a fact. Everything we see is a perspective, not the truth.”― Marcus AureliusShow Notes:So many things in our lives that we experience and accept to be “true” is simply a matter of perception.Often we make the mistake of thinking that just because we see or hear something that because we experienced it, it must be what reality is.That the way the we experience the world is the way the world really is.But the Stoics remind us that everything in our experience is simply our perception of it, and that our perceptions are quite often wrong.And that we should be prepared to let go of anything we hold as “facts” or “truth” because at any moment we could get new information and be completely wrong.We see this with optical illusions. We see imaginary things in the shadows.We see this in mistakes by eyewitness testimonies that are completely contradicted by video footage of the same event.Everything that we experience is just data signals coming in and our brains are doing it’s best to interpret what those signals mean.Is that a saber tooth tiger or just strange looking bush?Is that a bear or gnarled tree?It looks to what it learned from the past and tries to compare it and match it to what it’s seen or heard before.The other day my partner sent me a link to an video which played a voice speaking a word.The strange thing is that some in some people heard the word “laurel” and others heard the word “yanny”.In some cases, people could heard both words as if they were superimposed over each other.If you haven’t heard this, I’m going to play it for you now.I only heard laurel. My partner heard yanny. And as we sat together and listened it was so strange that we were listening to the same thing yet heard completely different words.The NYT website has a special player so you can adjust the frequencies to hear both, so I’ll adjust it to move between the two.I’ll also put the link in the show notes, so that you can find it later.But the point is, that most of our reality is simply subjective. We get the signal and try to make is mean something, and those things that we think are solid facts, are simply an opinion. And truth is very dependent on our perspective.Now this doesn’t mean that we shouldn’t believe anything. The point of Stoic rationality, and the basis for the scientific method is one that states, “This is the best opinion, based upon the information that I have. I could be proved wrong at any moment, so I should be willing to be open to changing my mind.”Or the most succinct way I’ve heard this put is, “Strong opinions, loosely held”.Link to the NYT player: https://www.nytimes.com/interactive/2018/05/16/upshot/audio-clip-yanny-laurel-debate.html---Hello friends! Thanks for listening. Want to take these principles to the next level? Join the Stoic Coffee House Community!  Stop by the website at stoic.coffee where you can sign up for our newsletter, and buy some great looking shirts and hoodies at the Stoic Coffee Shop. Like the theme song? You can find it here from my alter ego. :)Find me on instagram, twitter, or threadsLastly if you know of someone that would benefit from or appreciate this podcast, please share it. Word of mouth is the best way to help this podcast grow. Thanks again for listening. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

“Man is affected, not by events, but by the view he takes of them.”— EpictetusHuman beings are creatures that love good stories. Stories are the things that we use to make sense of the things in the world.Myths, such as the Greek and Roman or even Norse gods were used to explain why things happen in the world.Human beings like to give meaning to the things in their lives.It’s part of what makes us human. We give meaning to the expressions on other peoples faces. We give meanings to the words they speak.We attribute feelings and thoughts to animals even when we have no real idea of what their thoughts really are.One of the core tenets of Stoicism, is the understanding that events and circumstances are simply neutral. They have no meaning other than what we give to them.Things happen in life without any reason, which is hard because we as humans want to give meanings to events. We crave a reason. We crave a why. We want to believe that the hard things we go through have some greater purpose. Otherwise we feel that we suffer for nothing.For example, if we’re struggling with something, we can look at it as a struggle.But if we treat our challenges as opportunities to grow, then we haven’t suffered. We’ve grown stronger. It’s all about perspective.Years ago, I heard a great parable that illustrates well.A farmer finds a wild horse in his field. He’s able to lead the horse home and puts him in his stable.The neighbors upon hearing about the horse, congratulate him on his good luck.The farmer simply replies, “Good luck or bad luck, who knows?”The next day his son, while trying to train the horse, ends up being thrown, and breaks his leg.The neighbors upon hearing about the son, console the farmer on his bad luck.The farmer simply replies, “Good luck or bad luck, who knows?”The next day while the son is in the hospital, the representative from the emperor comes into town to draft conscripts for the army to fight on the border. His son is released from his obligation because of his broken leg.The neighbors upon hearing about his son missing the draft, congratulate him on his good luck.The farmer simply replies, “Good luck or bad luck, who knows?”After a week, the son comes home to finish recovering. While at the hospital he met a nurse and fell in love, and decided to get engaged.The neighbors upon hearing about the engagement, congratulate him on his good luck.The farmer simply replies, “Well, when it comes to marriage...good luck or bad luck, who knows?”Events and circumstances of life are neutral. It's up to you to decide if you have bad, or good luck. ---Hello friends! Thanks for listening. Want to take these principles to the next level? Join the Stoic Coffee House Community!  Stop by the website at stoic.coffee where you can sign up for our newsletter, and buy some great looking shirts and hoodies at the Stoic Coffee Shop. Like the theme song? You can find it here from my alter ego. :)Find me on instagram, twitter, or threadsLastly if you know of someone that would benefit from or appreciate this podcast, please share it. Word of mouth is the best way to help this podcast grow. Thanks again for listening. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

“If evil be said of thee, and if it be true, correct thyself; if it be a lie, laugh at it.” ― EpictetusShow Notes:•When I read this quote the first thing that came to mind was “I laugh in the face of evil!” •How often do we get upset at what others say about us? •How often do we let what others say about define who we are? •Why get upset about their opinion, esp if it’s a lie? •Remember, as Stoics we need to open to correction, because what we believe and how we see the world could be totally wrong. •We are going to make mistakes. •We need to act with integrity and decide if they said has merit. •So if someone points out a flaw, we should be thankful because we now know what to correct. •And if what is said about you is patently false, rather than let it upset, you should simply laugh in the face of evil. •On the surface this quote is telling us that we shouldn’t let what others say about us bother us, because it’s just their opinion, their way of seeing the world. •But if we dig a little deeper, what this quote is also telling us is that we need to deal with reality as it it, and not what we want it to be. •The reality is we will make mistakes. We’re not perfect. And there will be times when we fail to uphold our standards. •Often we don’t see the crappy things that we do, because sometimes because we don’t want to see them. Our ego gets in the way. •If we act with integrity should be willing to own our actions, and the outcome of our actions. •Don’t own others reactions. Everyone is responsible for their own emotions and reactions. •Be grateful for your enemies because they are often the only ones that tell you the truth. •And if they lie, laugh in the face of evil. ---Hello friends! Thanks for listening. Want to take these principles to the next level? Join the Stoic Coffee House Community!  Stop by the website at stoic.coffee where you can sign up for our newsletter, and buy some great looking shirts and hoodies at the Stoic Coffee Shop. Like the theme song? You can find it here from my alter ego. :)Find me on instagram, twitter, or threadsLastly if you know of someone that would benefit from or appreciate this podcast, please share it. Word of mouth is the best way to help this podcast grow. Thanks again for listening. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

“To admonish is better than to reproach for admonition is mild and friendly, but reproach is harsh and insulting; and admonition corrects those who are doing wrong, but reproach only convicts them.”― EpictetusShow Notes:Stoics believe that we can only control ourselves.But also believe that we are here to help others.As a Parent I’ve tried to be good about correcting there actions, but not make them feel like they’re a person because the make mistakes.I was often told I was bad person for my mistakes.My partner is great about giving constructive feedbackOften out with friends I’d dominate the conversation. She’d ask me on the way home if I noticed glazed eyes and lack of conversation on their part.She’d help point out these things so that I could get the results I wanted, which was to have engaging and fun conversations with my friendsNon-threatening, just matter of fact was really helpful, and helped me to trust the feedbackWhen we think we need correct someone, the first thing we should do is we should ask if they want to hear opinion, if they want to change.Respect the wish if they say no.Second is have a dialog by asking questions, don’t preach.Last keep our own judgements out of the conversation, otherwise the person will probably get pretty defensive.Nobody likes to feel judged.Most people want to be their best.Learning how to give and take constructive nonjudgmental feedback is a great skill that we all can benefit from.---Hello friends! Thanks for listening. Want to take these principles to the next level? Join the Stoic Coffee House Community!  Stop by the website at stoic.coffee where you can sign up for our newsletter, and buy some great looking shirts and hoodies at the Stoic Coffee Shop. Like the theme song? You can find it here from my alter ego. :)Find me on instagram, twitter, or threadsLastly if you know of someone that would benefit from or appreciate this podcast, please share it. Word of mouth is the best way to help this podcast grow. Thanks again for listening. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

“Well-being is attained little by little, and nevertheless is no little thing itself.”― Zeno of CitiumShow Notes:•Zeno of Citium was the original founder of the Stoic school of philosophy. •Not much of his writing survived, which is why he is not quoted very often when it comes to Stoic philosophy. •But I really like this quote as it talks about the importances of small habits to help us attain our well being and inner peace. •Working on things daily like recognizing what we can and can’t control, recognizing how our opinions on things shapes our view of whether we consider something good or bad, and so many other basic principles that we can practice daily. •This can be applied to our lives in so many areas. •We need to be careful of in life is to focus too much on the grand gestures, and not enough on the little things. •While I think it’s in some way easier to notice the bigger gestures, to me it seems that that the smaller things are the ones, that in the long run have a bigger impact. •While the big events or projects are the ones that stick out, it’s the small habits that we have that help us achieve those bigger goals. •Getting up each morning to go for a run will have bigger impact on your life than the marathon you run. •It’s the getting up each morning that makes it possible for you to actually run the marathon. •In our relationships, it’s often the small things that we do for each other that mean more more than flowers or chocolates. •One of the fondest things I remember about my father is him getting up early each morning and making us breakfast before I headed off to high school. •Getting up each morning and writing in my journal, writing this podcast, recording this podcast are all daily habits that have transformed my life. •Focusing on a small principle, even for a few minutes a day sets the tone for the day. •And the more that I write my ideas down for a podcast, the easier it becomes to take an idea and run with it. •And recording, while it still takes some time, has gotten so much easier, and smoother. •I’m sure that you’ve noticed how much smoother thing have gotten over the course of this podcast. •I can see for myself I’ve gotten better about expressing these ideas, and more relaxed and more comfortable in front of the mic then I ever was in the past. •All of this has sprung from a daily habit of just writing in my Stoic Journal. •Rome wasn’t built in a day, but little by little. A good life is built the same way - little by little. ---Hello friends! Thanks for listening. Want to take these principles to the next level? Join the Stoic Coffee House Community!  Stop by the website at stoic.coffee where you can sign up for our newsletter, and buy some great looking shirts and hoodies at the Stoic Coffee Shop. Like the theme song? You can find it here from my alter ego. :)Find me on instagram, twitter, or threadsLastly if you know of someone that would benefit from or appreciate this podcast, please share it. Word of mouth is the best way to help this podcast grow. Thanks again for listening. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Transcript:Hello friends, welcome to the Stoic Coffee Break. Today's episode...Stuff“Until we have begun to go without them, we fail to realize how unnecessary many things are. We've been using them not because we needed them but because we had them.”― SenecaOne of my favorite George Carlin routines is where he talks about stuff and he talks about how we work at our jobs so that we can buy lots of stuff, and then we have to buy a big house so that we can store all of our stuff ,and if we buy more stuff and it doesn't fit into our house that we end up buying a bigger house or renting a storage unit for more of our stuff, and it's just kind of the cycle of stuff. If you haven't seen it you can find it on YouTube but for me it was just such a poignant kind of sketch about consumerism United States and basically we just have so much stuff.Now I’m not suggesting that we all have to become minimalist there's nothing wrong with appreciating the things that you have and enjoying the things that you have. But we need to be careful about being too attached to the things that we have and placing our value on there's things.I mean what would happen if you so they lost all of the things that you had in your life maybe to a fire maybe to a flood would you feel like your world had ended because you didn't have these things or would you simply look at it and go there goes a bunch of stuff?When I moved to Austria, it was a bit a of a culture shock for me. Not just in the language and the food aspect but in the way of life aspect so there's a lot of things that they did that were very kind of alien to me in many different ways. I grew up in the suburbs and was used to living in a fairly good-sized house and I had had my own car as a teenager. And most people I met lived in smaller apartments and condos and didn't have a cars. I would say that I knew more people who didn't have cars than people who did and they would basically live in apartments their whole lives and they would use public transportation or walk or ride our bikes to get to where they needed to and that was really kind of strange for me at first. I didn't think that I could live a life like that where I lived in an apartment and didn't drive a car but I spent two years over there where I lived in smaller apartments and I didn't have a car the whole time. And after a while it became very normal for me and it was something that I grew to appreciate because they put their focus on so many other things like cooking really good food having their neighbors over a lot and being close with their community. It was a very different lifestyle and it was very rewarding in so many ways and what it first had felt so foreign seemed so normal by the time that I left and I really appreciated not having to worry about taking so much stuff with me.Remember it's not that stuff is bad it's just the more stuff we own the more I stuff owns us.That's the Stoic Coffee Break for today. Have a great day!---Hello friends! Thanks for listening. Want to take these principles to the next level? Join the Stoic Coffee House Community!  Stop by the website at stoic.coffee where you can sign up for our newsletter, and buy some great looking shirts and hoodies at the Stoic Coffee Shop. Like the theme song? You can find it here from my alter ego. :)Find me on instagram, twitter, or threadsLastly if you know of someone that would benefit from or appreciate this podcast, please share it. Word of mouth is the best way to help this podcast grow. Thanks again for listening. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

“If you really want to escape the things that harass you, what you’re needing is not to be in a different place but to be a different person.” ― SenecaShow Notes:•How often do we wish the world would change for us? •How often do we think that we can run from our troubles? •Maybe we work at a place where we feel like if our coworkers or our boss would just get their shit together then we’d be happy with our jobs. •Maybe we’re in a relationship where we feel like if the other person would just change the things that we want them to, we’d finally be happy. •Maybe we hate the town we’re living in and if only we could live somewhere else, we’d be happy. •Maybe we think that if we had a better house, a better car, a better partner, better kids, then we’d be happy. •There are so many things that we could point our finger at and say that needs to change, then I’d be happy. •But the thing is, all of these things are outside of yourself. Most of these things are things that you have very little control over. •And what Seneca means by this is that we are in control of our happiness. We can decide at any time to take control over the things that we can control, and be happy. •Wishing the world to change for us in order for us to be happy just isn’t going to happen. •Making our happiness dependent upon things that we can’t control is surefire way to be unhappy. •And all these external things that come our way are things that are outside of our control. •If you can learn to be happy in the lowest of circumstances, then you can be happy anywhere. ---Hello friends! Thanks for listening. Want to take these principles to the next level? Join the Stoic Coffee House Community!  Stop by the website at stoic.coffee where you can sign up for our newsletter, and buy some great looking shirts and hoodies at the Stoic Coffee Shop. Like the theme song? You can find it here from my alter ego. :)Find me on instagram, twitter, or threadsLastly if you know of someone that would benefit from or appreciate this podcast, please share it. Word of mouth is the best way to help this podcast grow. Thanks again for listening. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

“Other people's views and troubles can be contagious. Don't sabotage yourself by unwittingly adopting negative, unproductive attitudes through your associations with others.”― EpictetusIt’s important to be careful about the ideas we entertain.Because the ideas we hold determine who we areHow we show up in the worldHow we treat othersLet’s take money for example.If you hang around people that think that money is the measure of a person, you will treat people differently than someone that doesn’t.If think that that people who are poor are lazy and deserve what they get, then you’re more likely to treat them poorly.If we think that rich people are more deserving because they are rich, then we may treat them better simply because we assume they have more value.If you spend any amount of time watching any political news media, you’d think that the end of civilization was happening because of one side or the other.I had a good friend in college that used to listen to right wing talk radio fairly often. I’d known him since high school and he was generally a pretty fair minded person.But after years of listening to so much fear monger it and hateful ideas about the poor, other races, women’s rights, gay and lesbians, and the worst offenders: Democrats. And I really couldn’t understand why he had so much anger towards these groups that really had no impact on his life in any direct way.And we need to be careful about the attitudes and ideas of those around us.The more we are around ideas enough, the more we begin to see them as normal.While we all like to think that we are great critical thinkers, without taking extra care to truly examine the ideas that others present to you, it’s very easy to just fall in with the crowd and adopt a way of thinking that may not be one of our own choosing.I grew up in a culture that was very much about conforming to a specific dogma. It seemed pretty normal at the time, and it wasn’t until years later after moving out of my hometown that I began to see how so many of my unconscious attitudes had been formed by that culture.It’s taken a long time to become aware of and work on a lot of my own biases.And there are still times where I find that they way I act in a situation has been strongly influenced by these unconscious ideas that I was brought up with.So be aware of the people and ideas that you give your time to. Do they enlighten and help you forward as a person, or do they drag you down?Also, just because everyone around you may think or believe something doesn’t necessarily make it true.Just as an athlete is careful about what they put into their mouths in order to strengthen their bodies, we need to careful about the thoughts we put in our heads to strengthen our minds.---Hello friends! Thanks for listening. Want to take these principles to the next level? Join the Stoic Coffee House Community!  Stop by the website at stoic.coffee where you can sign up for our newsletter, and buy some great looking shirts and hoodies at the Stoic Coffee Shop. Like the theme song? You can find it here from my alter ego. :)Find me on instagram, twitter, or threadsLastly if you know of someone that would benefit from or appreciate this podcast, please share it. Word of mouth is the best way to help this podcast grow. Thanks again for listening. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

“Anger, if not restrained, is frequently more hurtful to us than the injury that provokes it.”― SenecaShow Notes:•Today’s topic is one that is a bit personal to me. It’s something that I struggle with at times. •I’ll get upset about something, and because I let anger get the best of me, I make the situation far worse than the event that I got angry about in the first place. •And getting angry also causes me to ruin my inner peace. We make myself unhappy by not dealing with anger in a constructive way. I give ourselves a bad day. •And it’s because sometimes anger feels good. That righteous indignation when we feel that someone has done us wrong and that we have the right to put them in their place. •Anger is something that each one of us have to deal with. •We don’t need to turn off anger. Repressing what we feel is not a good idea either. •But dealing with it in a healthy way is something that we can all learn. •We can feel the feelings, acknowledge them, then decide what to do about them. •We can ask whether we were actually harmed. Remember, we are only harmed if we believe we have been harmed. •We can ask ourselves if our response will do more harm than good. •We can ask ourselves if this will be important in the future, or will it be some forgotten trifle. •By giving into anger is like kicking the hornet’s nests because it was in our way, when we could have just as easily gone around •I know that we’ve discussed anger fairly often on this podcast, but being able to apply principles in your lives is a daily practice. A daily exercise. •Just as we wouldn’t just go to the gym once and workout and declare that we are in shape and never go back again, working on applying these principles is something that we need to work on everyday. It’s a way to get in our mental exercise. •And like an athlete, we’re going to have days where we run the perfect race and everything works in our favor. We also going to have a lot of days where we’re off and we fall flat on our faces. •And just like an athlete we need to gauge our fitness level for the day, and put in our best effort, regardless of how meager it might be. ---Hello friends! Thanks for listening. Want to take these principles to the next level? Join the Stoic Coffee House Community!  Stop by the website at stoic.coffee where you can sign up for our newsletter, and buy some great looking shirts and hoodies at the Stoic Coffee Shop. Like the theme song? You can find it here from my alter ego. :)Find me on instagram, twitter, or threadsLastly if you know of someone that would benefit from or appreciate this podcast, please share it. Word of mouth is the best way to help this podcast grow. Thanks again for listening. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

“Luck is what happens when preparation meets opportunity.”― SenecaAre you a lucky person?The Stoics understood that most things in life are out of our control.The reason that they stress that ideas so much, that we try so hard to control things around us.Trying to control things outside yourself causes yourself and others a lot of suffering.Other people, events, and circumstances are certainly outside of our control.So much of our life is simply up to chance.The people we meet and become friends with and fall in love with.The jobs that we get because of being the right place at the right time.So many things that just happened by chance, and all of them outside of our control.In the Drunkard’s Walk, a book about the role of randomness and chance in our lives, Leonard Mlodinow, after showing example after example about how poorly we as humans misjudge the role of chance in our lives goes on to say, “...ability does not guarantee achievement, nor is achievement proportional to ability. And so it is important to always keep in mind the other term in the equation—the role of chance…What I’ve learned, above all, is to keep marching forward because the best news is that since chance does play a role, one important factor in success is under our control: the number of at bats, the number of chances taken, the number of opportunities seized.”If we want to meet a great partner it’s not going to happen if we stay at home playing video games or watching Netflix. We need to go on a lot of dates. We need to be able to carry on a conversation.If we want to be a musician or an actor, but we never practice, even if we hustle to get a coveted gig, if we aren’t prepared and we don’t have the skill to pull it off, then we’ve wasted an opportunity.I find that there is a lot of dedication on the internet for shortcuts to success. As if success is a bunch of hacks that you can do so you don’t have to put actual work in. But the thing is, taking shortcuts can cheat us of the opportunities for growth. We should become masters of our craft, not only because it prepares us to take those opportunities, but mastering our craft is part of the journey, it makes us who we are.And the more we become masters of our craft, the less we need “shortcuts”.We also need to be careful to never think think that we “deserve” something.-Sometimes we think we are entitled to a certain way of life because who we are.Entitled to a certain job because of where we went to school.We are never entitled to anything.As Steven Pressfield said about creative endeavors, “We are entitled to our labors, but not the fruits of our labors.” Meaning we entitled to work our butts off and but we may still never find the success we think we deserve.As much as we all want a lucky silver bullet, because luck/chance/fate are all outside of our control, what we can control is consistently putting in the work.Fortune favors the bold, but she also favors the prepared.---Hello friends! Thanks for listening. Want to take these principles to the next level? Join the Stoic Coffee House Community!  Stop by the website at stoic.coffee where you can sign up for our newsletter, and buy some great looking shirts and hoodies at the Stoic Coffee Shop. Like the theme song? You can find it here from my alter ego. :)Find me on instagram, twitter, or threadsLastly if you know of someone that would benefit from or appreciate this podcast, please share it. Word of mouth is the best way to help this podcast grow. Thanks again for listening. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

“Any person capable of angering you becomes your master;he can anger you only when you permit yourself to be disturbed by him.”― EpictetusShow Notes:•Stoics believed strongly that we are all in control of our own emotions •One of the strongest emotions we have to deal with is anger •From an evolutionary standpoint it seems to makes sense. We feel threatened and we respond in a way that we think will deal with the threat. •But the thing is, fear is usually the response to a physical threat. Anger is usually response from a threat to our ego. Anger is usually what we use to try and control something that we can’t. •When someone speaks poorly of us, or does or says something we don’t like, we’re trying to control them through anger. •If someone is easily offended and flies off the handle at even the smallest thing, they are are trying to control others. •But when we get angry we’re failing to control the one thing we truly can control - ourselves. We’re giving control of our emotions to someone else. •Have you ever seen a kid do things just to get a rise out of someone? Maybe their siblings or their parents? It’s their way of trying to see if they can control the other person. •This is why politicians like to get people angry about something. Why they choose a polarizing side on an issue. It’s about control. •Get people angry about something and you have a lot more control over them. •People don’t go to war because they’re happy and want to be kind to others. •They go to war because they’re angry about something. And it may have started of being afraid of something, but was channeled into anger. •Remember, the only thing that you can control is yourself, so it’s up to you to decide - are you the master of yourself, or are you going to give that power to anyone else that upsets you? ---Hello friends! Thanks for listening. Want to take these principles to the next level? Join the Stoic Coffee House Community!  Stop by the website at stoic.coffee where you can sign up for our newsletter, and buy some great looking shirts and hoodies at the Stoic Coffee Shop. Like the theme song? You can find it here from my alter ego. :)Find me on instagram, twitter, or threadsLastly if you know of someone that would benefit from or appreciate this podcast, please share it. Word of mouth is the best way to help this podcast grow. Thanks again for listening. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

“True happiness is to enjoy the present, without anxious dependence upon the future, not to amuse ourselves with either hopes or fears but to rest satisfied with what we have, which is sufficient, for he that is so wants nothing. The greatest blessings of mankind are within us and within our reach. A wise man is content with his lot, whatever it may be, without wishing for what he has not.”― SenecaShow Notes:Does Seneca mean that we shouldn’t think about the future and strive for anything? Seneca himself was a wealthy merchant, which means that he did have to think about the future.Contentment with what we have, and not desiring what we don’t.Be grateful for what we have. Not being jealous of what someone else has.Contentment of the physical things you already have.If you desire what you already have, then you can be happy right now.It’s those moments when I look around and appreciate what I have that help remind me that life is good.How can we apply this to striving?What I think that he means is finding that space where you focus on the work and not the end product.You focus on the composition, not desiring the end song. Enjoy creating the painting more than desiring the painting.If you’re building a company, enjoy the work, more than having the success.Each of these are also things which you can control.By enjoying the moment, focusing and enjoying what you are doing, doing good work, making the best choices you can, being the best person you can be, the future will work itself out.If something works out, great. If it doesn’t, great.Learning to be content with and desiring what you already have is the easiest way to happiness because you already have it.---Hello friends! Thanks for listening. Want to take these principles to the next level? Join the Stoic Coffee House Community!  Stop by the website at stoic.coffee where you can sign up for our newsletter, and buy some great looking shirts and hoodies at the Stoic Coffee Shop. Like the theme song? You can find it here from my alter ego. :)Find me on instagram, twitter, or threadsLastly if you know of someone that would benefit from or appreciate this podcast, please share it. Word of mouth is the best way to help this podcast grow. Thanks again for listening. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

“Even as the Sun does not wait for prayers and incantations to rise, but shines forth and is welcomed by all: so should you not wait for clapping of hands and shouts and praise to do your duty; nay, do good of your own accord, and you will be loved like the Sun.”― EpictetusOne of the ideas that is common in a lot of religions is the idea of doing good works without the fanfare of other people. That we should do things because they are the right things to do, not because everyone will see what we are doing. And here Epictetus uses some great imagery to explain that idea. Just as the sun doesn’t wait for fanfare to shine, we shouldn’t wait to do things just to be seen by others.And what is wrong with that? What is wrong with doing things to be seen by others? We’re still doing good deeds aren’t we? And we get the added benefit of praise from others, so that’s good, right? When we do things just to be seen by others, we are worrying about the opinions of others. If we only do things when we can get praise, then there’s a lot of good things that we could do that will go undone because we were waiting to do it when others could praise us.We are giving our control to other people. We are in a sense letting the opinions of others dictate what we will do. When we act this way, we’re often thinking, “What’s in it for me?” What if everyone worked this way? What if everyone asked, “What’s in it for me?”What if you were injured and someone came along who could help you, but they decided not to because no one was around to see their good deed? They decided that it would not benefit them so they leave you to fend for yourself. This is what Jesus talked about the story of the good Samaritan.For those that don’t know the story, a man is traveling to another town, and is robbed, beaten, and left for dead. A priest and a Levite, who was religious man who worked in the temple, both pass by and leave the man. A Samaritan comes along and helps the man and takes him to an inn and pays for him to receive help with no expectation of being repaid or praised. At that time Jews and Samaritans despised each other, so in doing so, he showed that their “enemy” helped the man because it was the right things to do, not because of any outward praise or direct benefit to himself.The things is, our world is built upon us being cooperative and doing lots of little and big kindnesses throughout the day. And personally, I think that the one of the main purpose of lives, and what makes our lives richer is to lessen the suffering of others. And you know what? It feels good when I help others and do it because it’s something I want to do, not because I think I’ll get something out of it.Just as the sun shines on us without waiting for praise, we should make doing good for its own sake be part of our nature.---Hello friends! Thanks for listening. Want to take these principles to the next level? Join the Stoic Coffee House Community!  Stop by the website at stoic.coffee where you can sign up for our newsletter, and buy some great looking shirts and hoodies at the Stoic Coffee Shop. Like the theme song? You can find it here from my alter ego. :)Find me on instagram, twitter, or threadsLastly if you know of someone that would benefit from or appreciate this podcast, please share it. Word of mouth is the best way to help this podcast grow. Thanks again for listening. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

“As is a tale, so is life: not how long it is, but how good it is, is what matters.”― SenecaWe live in a time where the average lifespan is almost double what it was 200 years ago.Advances in medicine, sanitation, and agriculture have made it possible for more people to live longer.And in many other ways, the physical and external parts of life are better. Life is certainly much easier than it was 200 years ago.But as we work on increasing our lifespans, are we working on increasing the quality of our lives? Are we living a good life?Because what’s the point of living longer, just to live longer?If you live to 100 and you’re unhappy and miserable and treat people poorly, what’s the point?As a good Stoic, you should always keep in mind “Memento Mori”, that you could leave life at any moment, so you shouldn’t expect to live to an old age.It may happen, it may not. It’s something, that for the most part is out of our control, so you should do your best to live a life that, were you to die tomorrow, you’d be proud of.As Marcus Aurelius said, “Waste no more time arguing about what a good person should be. Be one.”What are you doing to write your story? What steps are you taking to create a life that is worth living? What are you doing to step out of the grind of work, Netflix, sleep, repeat?Don’t wait until tomorrow to work on becoming a better person.Don’t wait until later to be kind and helpful to others.Don’t wait until next year to start working on the dreams that you have.Since you don’t know how long you will live, put more effort into living better than living longer.---Hello friends! Thanks for listening. Want to take these principles to the next level? Join the Stoic Coffee House Community!  Stop by the website at stoic.coffee where you can sign up for our newsletter, and buy some great looking shirts and hoodies at the Stoic Coffee Shop. Like the theme song? You can find it here from my alter ego. :)Find me on instagram, twitter, or threadsLastly if you know of someone that would benefit from or appreciate this podcast, please share it. Word of mouth is the best way to help this podcast grow. Thanks again for listening. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

“You always own the option of having no opinion. There is never any need to get worked up or to trouble your soul about things you can't control. These things are not asking to be judged by you. Leave them alone.”― Marcus AureliusHave you ever considered the possibility that you don’t need to have an opinion about something? That you don’t need to pass judgment on everything?Before you spend your time worrying about something, what if you took the time to decide if it was worth having an opinion about? There are so many things in this world that have no impact on us whatsoever. So why waste your time on these things? How much energy is wasted on who a celebrity is dating or not dating? Or the fact that they were seen in some untrendy store wearing sweatpants and a baseball cap?Have you ever been around someone that had to give their opinion on everything? As if they they were imparting some great wisdom by giving you their uninformed opinion on something that didn’t even matter? In most cases, when we think that everyone else is entitled to our opinion, we tend to show how uninformed we really are.Or if it’s something small and trivial, that we're just a petty gossip.I often hear people talk like this about political matters as if their opinion on what some pundit had to say about someone else, actually mattered. Would actually have an impact. If these things don’t have any effect, why waste time and energy on them?The next time you find yourself talking about the stupid thing that so celebrity or some politician said or did, ask yourself, “Do I really need to have an opinion on this?” And save that precious time doing something that matters.---Hello friends! Thanks for listening. Want to take these principles to the next level? Join the Stoic Coffee House Community!  Stop by the website at stoic.coffee where you can sign up for our newsletter, and buy some great looking shirts and hoodies at the Stoic Coffee Shop. Like the theme song? You can find it here from my alter ego. :)Find me on instagram, twitter, or threadsLastly if you know of someone that would benefit from or appreciate this podcast, please share it. Word of mouth is the best way to help this podcast grow. Thanks again for listening. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

“The key is to keep company only with people who uplift you, whose presence calls forth your best.” — EpictetusHave you found your tribe? Have you found that group of people that are your “chosen” family, who just make you feel good? Where you feel like you are accepted and understood? Where you don’t feel like you have to be on your guard? You can make mistakes.When you find your tribe, you thrive.It took me years to find my tribe. And the reason that I knew it was my tribe was that I felt like I could just relax and be myself around all these smart and generous people. They accepted me and all my shortcomings, and giving space for others to make mistakes and make amends when needed. But there was always this idea of learning new things and growing,A few weeks ago I was hanging out with my tribe, and a couple of them were moving a van to do some work on it. One of them was pulling the van into the workshop and was trying to get it up open some blocks and almost ran it into the tool racks. My friend who owns the shop, rather than getting upset that they almost hit the tool racks, simply told them how to properly get the van up on the blocks.And it’s simple things like that, where priorities are not about things, but about people, that let me know time and again that I’ve found the right tribe.Being around people that bring me up and encourage the best from me and make it safe for me to make mistakes has really helped me grow into the person that I’ve wanted to become. Life is too short to spend your time around people that bring you down. And sometimes it’s hard to leave friends that aren’t good for you because we as humans get comfortable, and the idea of change is often frightening. The thing is, it’s big world, and there are so many amazing people out there. It took me years to find my tribe, but once I found it, I knew it.And personally, I think this kind of thing should go with your partner. Because you spend so much time with your partner and they have such a giant influence on what kind of a person you they should be the kind of person that helps you to be a better you. Now I’m not saying that you should run out and dump all your friends or get divorced. But if you notice that the friends you’re hanging around with aren’t the kind that build you up, you may need to think about how much time you spend around them.I know that some people feel like just because a relationship has lasted for a long time means that it’s good. And I don’t think this is true. I’ve known plenty of married couples where both sides were miserable but they felt that if they got divorce, that it was a failure. I think a failed marriage is one where you end up miserable. I think that a successful relationship, whether that’s with friends or a partner, is one that lasts as long as it needs to.There are people that I was very close to years ago, that I rarely see now. It doesn’t mean that there’s anything wrong with either of us. It simply means that we’re different people, and what we need and want out of life is very different. And that’s okay. And there are some people that I to recognized aren’t good for me to be around so I let those relationships go. I recognized that I could not change them, nor was it my place to expect them to change, so I chose my growth and happiness over spending time with them.Finding your tribe, is one of the most important contributors to your personal growth and happiness. Finding those good people that you chose to spend your time with can mean the difference between just getting by, and really becoming the best person you can be, and really enjoying your life. And I can tell you this from personal experience.If you found your tribe, good for you. If not, keep at it. The world is a big place. You’ll find them.---Hello friends! Thanks for listening. Want to take these principles to the next level? Join the Stoic Coffee House Community!  Stop by the website at stoic.coffee where you can sign up for our newsletter, and buy some great looking shirts and hoodies at the Stoic Coffee Shop. Like the theme song? You can find it here from my alter ego. :)Find me on instagram, twitter, or threadsLastly if you know of someone that would benefit from or appreciate this podcast, please share it. Word of mouth is the best way to help this podcast grow. Thanks again for listening. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

“He who laughs at himself never runs out of things to laugh at.” ― EpictetusOne of the most important things in life is that we don’t take ourselves too seriously. Remember, Stoics keep in the forefront of their minds the knowledge that one day they too will die, and when you look at life through that lens, you learn to give things their appropriate weight. Is that thing that you are stressing about going to be of importance in 10 years? 100 years? 1000? 10,000?We talk a lot about how you can’t control the opinions of others and what they may think about you. And I think being able to laugh at yourself is a place that can free you from a lot of stress in your life.About 10 years ago, I became the butt of a Weird Al Yankovic joke and created a trending topic on Twitter for a day. In response to an amusing video he posted on Twitter about streets sign using poor grammar. I retweeted it and misspelled the word grammar. Weird Al responded with the the correct spelling, and boom, there I was at the receiving end of embarrassing retweet after retweet.While the incident itself was harmless, I found myself really upset by it. I consider myself to be intelligent and literate, so being at the receiving end of other people’s laughter about my perceived lack of intelligence really hurt my ego. When I look back on it now, it seems pretty silly, and I can laugh about now. But at the time it really stung.And why is that? Why would the opinion of so many people, none of whom I actually know, matter so much? When I think about it now and using my logic, it was simply words on a digital page. That’s it. But because I used to be so worried about the opinion of others, I could feel my cheeks burn with embarrassment even there was no one around to see me. I even suspended my account for a bit.But you know what? The next day it was forgotten and the twitterverse had moved on to something else. All the stress was for nothing.The more you learn to lighten up and are able to laugh at yourself, the more you can enjoy your life, and let go of things when they don’t work out as planned. Can you laugh at yourself? Can you let go of your ego enough to realize that you can laugh at yourself and the silly things you hold on to? If others laugh at you can you recognize that it impacts you as much as you let it? That even if they do laugh at you that it doesn’t change who you are?To me, being able to laugh at yourself is a way of being able to forgive yourself for the silly mistakes that we make.Learning how to lighten up and find the silliness and joy in life can make such a huge change in your life. And if you can bring a little lightness to someone else’s life by some silly foible, consider it a good day and laugh along with.---Hello friends! Thanks for listening. Want to take these principles to the next level? Join the Stoic Coffee House Community!  Stop by the website at stoic.coffee where you can sign up for our newsletter, and buy some great looking shirts and hoodies at the Stoic Coffee Shop. Like the theme song? You can find it here from my alter ego. :)Find me on instagram, twitter, or threadsLastly if you know of someone that would benefit from or appreciate this podcast, please share it. Word of mouth is the best way to help this podcast grow. Thanks again for listening. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

“How much better to heal than seek revenge from injury. Vengeance wastes a lot of time and exposes you to many more injuries than the first that sparked it. Anger always outlasts hurt. Best to take the opposite course. Would anyone think it normal to return a kick to a mule or a bite to a dog?”— SenecaI was talking with a friend the other day about how to deal with anger. He asked me specifically about how to deal with anger in life, so I felt it only appropriate to talk about anger today.Anger is something that I’ve certainly struggled with. Growing up with a terrible example of how to deal with anger, I would either avoid it, or I would be consumed by it. Finding a way to deal with it constructively has taken years of work, and I still struggle with it.Sometimes it feels like we live in a world that often seems to be fueled by anger. You turn on the news and it seems that story after story is about some of the worst instances of humanity. Almost any political talk show seems to trying it’s best to whip us up into fearing and hating the other side. So much so, that it seems that we can’t have an actual discussion with those that disagree with us politically. When we live in a society that thinks it’s okay to take down those that do you wrong or disagree with you, it’s hard to stop and take those steps to be kind to those that you feel have injured you.But the idea of not returning hate with hate is not a new new one.Jesus taught, “You have heard that it was said, ‘Love your neighbor and hate your enemy.’ But I say unto you, Love your enemies, bless them that curse you, do good to them that hate you, and pray for them which despitefully use you, and persecute you.”In Buddhist teachings, anger is often compared to an “out of control forest fire” and a “rampaging elephant.” Because reactive uncontrolled anger is so destructive so quickly.Confucius said, “Holding onto anger is like holding onto a burning ember that you want to throw at someone. You’re the one that gets burned.”And the Stoics are no different. Seneca is warns us that vengeance wastes a lot of time. It also wastes a lot of energy. When you seek revenge, you injure yourself with your own anger. You often say or do things that make the situation far worse than it was before.Why do we give into the angry path? Because anger is easy. Because there’s a part of anger that feels good at the time. The desire to strike back at those that you feel have wronged you is powerful.What if all that effort was put into understanding why the other person tried to injure you? What if you took that same time and energy and tried to heal the situation? What if all that effort was put into mobilizing people for good? For getting people to talk to each other and work on solutions?How do we deal with anger? How do we train ourselves to not give into our impulses?The first step, which is often the hardest, is to truly grasp the concept that you are 100% responsible for your emotions. No one else is. Nothing else is to blame. Regardless of the circumstances or the events that happen, you decide to if you want to respond in anger. And just as you have conditioned yourself to respond with anger, you can condition yourself to respond with calmness and rationality.The next step is being aware of our anger. Do you notice when you are in throws of anger, rather than only really seeing it after you cool down?Next, try to step back from it. Can you look at it from a detached perspective? Can you look at as if you were just someone else in the room observing it? When you are more able to catch yourself in the middle of it, and can take a step back, resist the urge to lash out. Think about if what you want to say will do harm or help.Stick to it. When you are in the heat of the moment and you do get some control, the other person may still be arguing or pushing back even though you are making honest efforts to defuse the situation. Don’t revert back to lashing out, no matter how much you want to. Think before you speak. If you have to leave the situation, then do so. Step away and delete that angry Facebook post.Once you’ve worked to cool yourself down, understand that healing the situation is about the other person, not about make yourself feel better. It’s about meeting the needs of the person that you have harmed. It will take time, and humble attitude to work things out.Changing a habit of reactive anger is not easy. It may be one of the hardest things you will ever have to overcome. But the damage that is caused by not learning to control your emotions can take a long time to heal. The more you can keep a reign on yourself, the less you have to repair. The more inner tranquility you cultivate, the more you can apply your energy to building things up rather than tearing them down.---Hello friends! Thanks for listening. Want to take these principles to the next level? Join the Stoic Coffee House Community!  Stop by the website at stoic.coffee where you can sign up for our

“Nature hath given men one tongue but two ears, that we may hear from others twice as much as we speak.”— EpictetusEpictetus was known for his clever wit and pithy sayings, and here he’s giving us some very good advice of how we should handle ourselves in any social situation. We’ve all been around people that dominate conversations, and maybe we’ve been that person. As I’ve mentioned before on this podcast, I used to talk over people in conversations all the time. While mine was born out of insecurity and wanting people to like me, learning how to listen to others brings many benefits.Let me put it this way, if you’re talking all the time how are you going to learn anything?As Stoics we should strive to be consummate learners. We should view ourselves always as students of life, and we can always learn something from everyone. And because we also strive to be in control of ourselves, by taking our time, listening and observing, we can be sure that what we have to say is well thought out, rather than simply spitting out the first thing that comes to mind. And I know that some us are probably more wired to be a bit talkative. And if that’s who you are, that’s perfectly okay. But as someone that is also wired that way, learning how to listen better pays off amazing dividends and even making small steps in that direction is well worth the effort.The thing is, people also feel more connected to you when they feel like you’ve heard and understood them. They notice when you’re more focused on what you want to say next than actually paying attention to them. Also, people like to talk about themselves, and if you are open to listening you’d be surprised what people will share with you, and the more you know about a person, the more connected you feel with them. Who knows, maybe you share some common interests that you would have never know about if you’d been too busy talking.If we’re too busy trying to show off, we're not paying attention to what’s going around us. The people that I’ve seen that seem pretty wise to me, usually take the time to assess a situation, to observe and to see what they notice. They’re not in rush to show how much they know, but they take their time and are curious to see if their hunches about their observations play out. Because they put in the effort to read situations better, it’s like they have a sixth sense about people which comes in very useful in all kinds of ways.Remember, taking time to be observant, for some of us, is not always easy. It takes some humility to recognize that just because we think something doesn’t mean it has to said out loud. By taking time to truly listen to others and focus on what they have to share, we can be more connected with others, practice being more observant in our lives in general, and we might even learn something new.---Hello friends! Thanks for listening. Want to take these principles to the next level? Join the Stoic Coffee House Community!  Stop by the website at stoic.coffee where you can sign up for our newsletter, and buy some great looking shirts and hoodies at the Stoic Coffee Shop. Like the theme song? You can find it here from my alter ego. :)Find me on instagram, twitter, or threadsLastly if you know of someone that would benefit from or appreciate this podcast, please share it. Word of mouth is the best way to help this podcast grow. Thanks again for listening. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

“Progress is not achieved by luck or accident, but by working on yourself daily.”— EpictetusOften, we find it difficult to take the steps to improve in an area we’re weak in. We can see how we want to be, and we get impatient when we’re not make the progress that we think we should. It also hard because we often know what not to do, but we don’t quite know what we should do to get where we want to be.When I was in high school, I accidentally ended up in choir. And I do mean accidentally. I missed the bus for home so I was waiting for my brother to finish up what he was doing, and was convinced by two girls to try out for the choir while I was waiting. Apparently I didn’t completely suck because I made it through auditions and into the choir that year.But to be honest, I wasn’t all that great when I first got into choir. I was put with the second tenors and had a really hard time singing my part as I would find myself ending up singing melody lines with the sopranos. It was frustrating at times because I knew that I was singing the wrong notes, but I didn’t have yet the ability to hear and sing the tenor part.This went on for several months, with each day getting a little better and me being able to hold my part a little better and less getting off track and singing the melody.There were a number of steps that I took to help me get better at singing. I made sure to sit next to other strong singers so I could hear the tenor part.I took my music home and would play out the tenor notes on my piano so that I was more familiar with them the next day in choir.At times I would stop singing and just listen to the singers next to me to be sure that I heard the part correctlyI took voice lessons to help strengthen my voice so that I could sing more clearly.By the end of that first year, I had improved enough that I made it into the show choir the next year.When you want to make real progress taking a small step every day, no matter how small, is what is going to get you to where you want to be. Grand gestures are all well and good, but we often burn out because we can’t sustain that level of focus. There are plenty of steps that we can take that are for more sustainable and will keep us moving forward after our initial enthusiasm has waned.Doing things like surrounding yourself with other people who are more skilled than you and following their example can help you make significant progress as they can share things they’ve learned, and support you in times when you need it.Setting time aside each day to deliberately focus and practice on what you’re trying to improve in can help you be ready for when a situation arises where you need to use that skill.Finding a mentor who’s been down that path can help you avoid pitfalls and obstacles as well.And lastly, be patient. Judge yourself not by where you are today, but by how much progress you have made.Remember, you can’t expect to just magically be good at something. You need to put the work in. If you are moving forward everyday, even just a little, you’re on the right path.---Hello friends! Thanks for listening. Want to take these principles to the next level? Join the Stoic Coffee House Community!  Stop by the website at stoic.coffee where you can sign up for our newsletter, and buy some great looking shirts and hoodies at the Stoic Coffee Shop. Like the theme song? You can find it here from my alter ego. :)Find me on instagram, twitter, or threadsLastly if you know of someone that would benefit from or appreciate this podcast, please share it. Word of mouth is the best way to help this podcast grow. Thanks again for listening. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

“Remember, it is not enough to be hit or insulted to be harmed, you must believe that you are being harmed. If someone succeeds in provoking you, realize that your mind is complicit in the provocation. Which is why it is essential that we not respond impulsively to impressions; take a moment before reacting, and you will find it easier to maintain control.”― EpictetusOne of the idea that the Stoics strongly hold is that no one can make us feel anything with our permission. And what do I mean by that?If someone is rude to us, shouldn’t we feel offended?If someone is mean to us, should us feel hurt?If someone gossips about us, shouldn’t we feel indignant?Sure. We can go right ahead and feel whatever we want. Just remember that it’s our choice for feel that way.And how is it our choice? Because we give meaning to the other person’s words or actions. It’s the way that we think about what they did or, that causes those emotions.Have you ever been around someone that is easily offended? They look for slights or ulterior motives in everything other people do? Because they are expecting others to do things that are rude or offensive, even the smallest thing feeds into their ideas of the fact that someone is out to get them.And on the flip side, have you been around someone that is patient and calm, and always assumes the best motives of others, or failing good motives, that the other person is simply ignorant? People like this choose to see the exact same words and actions from others from a completely different perspective, and by giving people the benefit of the doubt, they are not easily offended, or not offended at all. By rejecting the idea that they somehow suffered by the words of others, they are acknowledging that the words of others hold only as much power over them as they let them. They decided that they weren’t hurt by those words, and therefore they weren’t.So why do we take offensive at what others do an say? Why do we get bent out of shape about what others do? (And as side note, I think it’s interesting that we “take offense” at something as if it is something we reach out ourselves and grab.) I think we take offense because we have expectations of how we think someone else should act, and when they don’t act the way that we think they should, we get frustrated that we aren’t able to control the outcome. Our egos don’t like it.Remember, you always have choice to decide that you have been injured. And as Marcus Aurelius said, “Reject your sense of injury and the injury itself disappears.”---Hello friends! Thanks for listening. Want to take these principles to the next level? Join the Stoic Coffee House Community!  Stop by the website at stoic.coffee where you can sign up for our newsletter, and buy some great looking shirts and hoodies at the Stoic Coffee Shop. Like the theme song? You can find it here from my alter ego. :)Find me on instagram, twitter, or threadsLastly if you know of someone that would benefit from or appreciate this podcast, please share it. Word of mouth is the best way to help this podcast grow. Thanks again for listening. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

“I have often wondered how it is that every man loves himself more than all the rest of men, but yet sets less value on his own opinion of himself than on the opinion of others.”— Marcus Aurelius---Hello friends! Thanks for listening. Want to take these principles to the next level? Join the Stoic Coffee House Community!  Stop by the website at stoic.coffee where you can sign up for our newsletter, and buy some great looking shirts and hoodies at the Stoic Coffee Shop. Like the theme song? You can find it here from my alter ego. :)Find me on instagram, twitter, or threadsLastly if you know of someone that would benefit from or appreciate this podcast, please share it. Word of mouth is the best way to help this podcast grow. Thanks again for listening. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

“It is in your power to withdraw yourself whenever you desire. Perfect tranquility within consists in the good ordering of the mind, the realm of your own.”― Marcus AureliusHow often do you take time in your day to retreat the the tranquility of your mind? Our phones, our computers, TV, radio, YouTube, so many things that can drive us to distraction. So many things out that we could give our attention, that often we feel overwhelmed by all the noise.With the myth of multitasking coupled with the fear of missing out, we can easily be in a a victim of a full frontal assault of our senses. I know that for me, I used to feel that my mind was just moving too fast and felt rather chaotic, and if I could just stay one step ahead of it, I wouldn’t feel like I was being overwhelmed the many thoughts racing through my head. The only problem was that I often felt too scattered to really focus on things when I needed to. Because I was in a perpetual state of staying busy, when I did stop, I would often feel uncomfortable in the stillness.When we try to multitask believing that we’ll be more productive, we pay a cognitive cost for switching between tasks. In study after study it has been shown that we actually get far less done, and the quality of our work is far below what it could have been if we focused on one single task.So what would happen if you took some time each day to practice focusing on just one thought or idea? In the book Deep Work by Cal Newport, he talks about the need to give our minds a rest and be bored, saying, “To simply wait and be bored has become a novel experience in modern life, but from the perspective of concentration training, it’s incredibly valuable.”Taking time to just retreat into our own thoughts helps us to practice having well ordered thoughts, and learning how to have clearer thinking is not something that simply comes because we want it. Like all things, it takes effort to train you mind. Newport goes on to say, “Your will, in other words, is not a manifestation of your character that you can deploy without limit; it’s instead like a muscle that tires.”When you put aside some time to just think, or to write down your thoughts, you begin to find that little by little you are able to strengthen that muscle, direct your thinking, and keep your focus on things longer. And when you have this kind of focus, you are generally more relaxed, and less anxious because you don’t feel like your mind is racing a million miles an hour. Whether that’s taking some time to go for a short walk, or to sit down and write your thoughts, you’ll find that you are able to focus on task for a longer amount of time, without having to check Facebook every 10 minutes.Building a practice of being able to retreat into the tranquility of your own mind helps you to have clearer thinking and help you be far more effective in any area you chose to apply yourself.Remember, your time and attention are priceless treasures. Learn to invest them wisely, and you return on in investment will be far greater that you can imagine.---Hello friends! Thanks for listening. Want to take these principles to the next level? Join the Stoic Coffee House Community!  Stop by the website at stoic.coffee where you can sign up for our newsletter, and buy some great looking shirts and hoodies at the Stoic Coffee Shop. Like the theme song? You can find it here from my alter ego. :)Find me on instagram, twitter, or threadsLastly if you know of someone that would benefit from or appreciate this podcast, please share it. Word of mouth is the best way to help this podcast grow. Thanks again for listening. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

“It is not death that a man should fear, but he should fear never beginning to live.”― Marcus AureliusIf you’ve been listening to the podcast for a while, then you’ll recognize the term “Memento Mori” which means to remember death, in that you you could leave life at any moment. The Stoics believed strongly in keeping this idea in the forefront of their decision making and how they went about their daily lives. It is used as tool to help put things in perspective. It doesn’t mean that you should live each day like it was your last in that you don’t go to work, and party like there was no tomorrow.What it does mean was that you live each life in a way that you would be proud of how you lived that day. It also means that you don’t put off those things that are important for some other day, because that day may never come.Are there things that you’re putting off? Are there dreams and goals that you want to accomplish but you’re waiting for everything to line up and for the perfect conditions to arise? The thing is, there is never a perfect time. And if we view things through the lens of Memento Mori, we remind ourselves that we may not be here tomorrow.In my own life, it’s taken me up until my 40’s to really step up and decide that I want to follow some of my dreams. At the beginning of this year, I started the podcast as a step forward in following some of the dreams and goals that I had. Even though I was scared that people would think this was dumb or that I didn’t know what I was talking about, I did it anyway.And what I’ve learned along that way, is that if you take a small step every day towards your goal, you’ll find it impacts everything else in your life. As you see progress each day, no matter how small, it helps you start to take control of your own life. Because by taking a small step every day, you are controlling one thing that you can control. Your actions.Because the thing is, you are going to die. That is a certainty. And if you never live the life that you’re meant to, then why be afraid to die? If you’re not living the life you want, then is it any better than death? There’s a reason why people are so afraid of zombies and the idea of zombies. It’s because it’s someone that is alive but not really living. And if you feel like what you do doesn’t really matter in the long run, then what’s harm in doing something you love?And this doesn’t mean that you have throw out the life you have. I work on this podcast everyday, and I still have my day job. I’d like to encourage you to make a goal to do something that you love, that makes you feel alive, for at least 20 minutes everyday. Whether that’s writing every day. Playing an instrument or singing.Or training for a marathon. Whatever it is that makes you feel alive, try to work on it a little each day. And stick with for as long as you can, and see what other areas of your life it impacts as you are consistently taking control of your life.Remember, death is certain. But to live a choice.---Hello friends! Thanks for listening. Want to take these principles to the next level? Join the Stoic Coffee House Community!  Stop by the website at stoic.coffee where you can sign up for our newsletter, and buy some great looking shirts and hoodies at the Stoic Coffee Shop. Like the theme song? You can find it here from my alter ego. :)Find me on instagram, twitter, or threadsLastly if you know of someone that would benefit from or appreciate this podcast, please share it. Word of mouth is the best way to help this podcast grow. Thanks again for listening. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

“Epictetus being asked how a man should give pain to his enemy answered, By preparing himself to live the best life that he can.”— EpictetusHow often have we been upset with someone and wished ill on them? Maybe someone said something unflattering about us, and we pointed out all of their faults to show that they’re worse than us?What if instead of looking for ways to bring that other person down, we looked for ways to make ourselves a better person?For example, if someone called you greedy and selfish, wouldn’t the better way to counter their argument be to work harder to be more generous? If they called you arrogant, learning to be humble? If they said you were short tempered, learning to be more patient?Say for example, you wrote a book and a critic wrote a scathing review. Rather than trashing your critic and defending yourself and trying to find ways to bring them down, wouldn’t the sweeter revenge be to write an even better book? Wouldn’t that be the ultimate in your face move?The thing is, you should always be striving to be a better person anyway, but if using something like disproving the opinion of your enemy gives you the motivation to be a better person, then I say use it. And in working to become a better person, you’ll reach a point where their opinions don’t matter.What if our political leaders rather than trying to tear down their opponents with angry rhetoric, worked harder at proving them wrong by becoming better people? Can you imagine how much better the world could be? Rather than spending time tearing down those that oppose you, use your energy to improve yourself and you’ll not only become a better person, but prove your enemy wrong at the same time.And that my friends, is the sweetest revenge.---Hello friends! Thanks for listening. Want to take these principles to the next level? Join the Stoic Coffee House Community!  Stop by the website at stoic.coffee where you can sign up for our newsletter, and buy some great looking shirts and hoodies at the Stoic Coffee Shop. Like the theme song? You can find it here from my alter ego. :)Find me on instagram, twitter, or threadsLastly if you know of someone that would benefit from or appreciate this podcast, please share it. Word of mouth is the best way to help this podcast grow. Thanks again for listening. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

“The greater the difficulty, the more glory in surmounting it. Skillful pilots gain their reputation from storms and tempests.” ― Epictetus---Hello friends! Thanks for listening. Want to take these principles to the next level? Join the Stoic Coffee House Community!  Stop by the website at stoic.coffee where you can sign up for our newsletter, and buy some great looking shirts and hoodies at the Stoic Coffee Shop. Like the theme song? You can find it here from my alter ego. :)Find me on instagram, twitter, or threadsLastly if you know of someone that would benefit from or appreciate this podcast, please share it. Word of mouth is the best way to help this podcast grow. Thanks again for listening. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

“Accept the things to which fate binds you, and love the people with whom fate brings you together, but do so with all your heart.” ― Marcus Aurelius---Hello friends! Thanks for listening. Want to take these principles to the next level? Join the Stoic Coffee House Community!  Stop by the website at stoic.coffee where you can sign up for our newsletter, and buy some great looking shirts and hoodies at the Stoic Coffee Shop. Like the theme song? You can find it here from my alter ego. :)Find me on instagram, twitter, or threadsLastly if you know of someone that would benefit from or appreciate this podcast, please share it. Word of mouth is the best way to help this podcast grow. Thanks again for listening. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

“It is unrealistic to expect people to see you as you see yourself.” ― Epictetus---Hello friends! Thanks for listening. Want to take these principles to the next level? Join the Stoic Coffee House Community!  Stop by the website at stoic.coffee where you can sign up for our newsletter, and buy some great looking shirts and hoodies at the Stoic Coffee Shop. Like the theme song? You can find it here from my alter ego. :)Find me on instagram, twitter, or threadsLastly if you know of someone that would benefit from or appreciate this podcast, please share it. Word of mouth is the best way to help this podcast grow. Thanks again for listening. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

“Most of what passes for legitimate entertainment is inferior or foolish and only caters to or exploits people's weaknesses. Avoid being one of the mob who indulges in such pastimes. Your life is too short and you have important things to do. Be discriminating about what images and ideas you permit into your mind. If you yourself don't choose what thoughts and images you expose yourself to, someone else will, and their motives may not be the highest. It is the easiest thing in the world to slide imperceptibly into vulgarity. But there's no need for that to happen if you determine not to waste your time and attention on mindless pap.” ― Epictetus---Hello friends! Thanks for listening. Want to take these principles to the next level? Join the Stoic Coffee House Community!  Stop by the website at stoic.coffee where you can sign up for our newsletter, and buy some great looking shirts and hoodies at the Stoic Coffee Shop. Like the theme song? You can find it here from my alter ego. :)Find me on instagram, twitter, or threadsLastly if you know of someone that would benefit from or appreciate this podcast, please share it. Word of mouth is the best way to help this podcast grow. Thanks again for listening. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

“Do not try to seem wise to others. If you want to live a wise life, live it on your own terms and in your own eyes.” ― Epictetus---Hello friends! Thanks for listening. Want to take these principles to the next level? Join the Stoic Coffee House Community!  Stop by the website at stoic.coffee where you can sign up for our newsletter, and buy some great looking shirts and hoodies at the Stoic Coffee Shop. Like the theme song? You can find it here from my alter ego. :)Find me on instagram, twitter, or threadsLastly if you know of someone that would benefit from or appreciate this podcast, please share it. Word of mouth is the best way to help this podcast grow. Thanks again for listening. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

“A boxer derives the greatest advantage from his sparring partner – and my accuser is my sparring partner. He trains me in patience, civility and even temper.” — Epictetus---Hello friends! Thanks for listening. Want to take these principles to the next level? Join the Stoic Coffee House Community!  Stop by the website at stoic.coffee where you can sign up for our newsletter, and buy some great looking shirts and hoodies at the Stoic Coffee Shop. Like the theme song? You can find it here from my alter ego. :)Find me on instagram, twitter, or threadsLastly if you know of someone that would benefit from or appreciate this podcast, please share it. Word of mouth is the best way to help this podcast grow. Thanks again for listening. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

“Whenever you are about to find fault with someone, ask yourself the following question: What fault of mine most nearly resembles the one I am about to criticize?” — Marcus Aurelius---Hello friends! Thanks for listening. Want to take these principles to the next level? Join the Stoic Coffee House Community!  Stop by the website at stoic.coffee where you can sign up for our newsletter, and buy some great looking shirts and hoodies at the Stoic Coffee Shop. Like the theme song? You can find it here from my alter ego. :)Find me on instagram, twitter, or threadsLastly if you know of someone that would benefit from or appreciate this podcast, please share it. Word of mouth is the best way to help this podcast grow. Thanks again for listening. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

“We must not believe the many, who say that only free people ought to be educated, but we should rather believe the philosophers who say that only the educated are free.” — Epictetus---Hello friends! Thanks for listening. Want to take these principles to the next level? Join the Stoic Coffee House Community!  Stop by the website at stoic.coffee where you can sign up for our newsletter, and buy some great looking shirts and hoodies at the Stoic Coffee Shop. Like the theme song? You can find it here from my alter ego. :)Find me on instagram, twitter, or threadsLastly if you know of someone that would benefit from or appreciate this podcast, please share it. Word of mouth is the best way to help this podcast grow. Thanks again for listening. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

“Caretake this moment. Immerse yourself in its particulars. Respond to this person, this challenge, this deed. Quit the evasions. Stop giving yourself needless trouble. It is time to really live; to fully inhabit the situation you happen to be in now. You are not some disinterested bystander. Participate. Exert yourself.” ― Epictetus---Hello friends! Thanks for listening. Want to take these principles to the next level? Join the Stoic Coffee House Community!  Stop by the website at stoic.coffee where you can sign up for our newsletter, and buy some great looking shirts and hoodies at the Stoic Coffee Shop. Like the theme song? You can find it here from my alter ego. :)Find me on instagram, twitter, or threadsLastly if you know of someone that would benefit from or appreciate this podcast, please share it. Word of mouth is the best way to help this podcast grow. Thanks again for listening. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

“Man is not worried by real problems so much as by his imagined anxieties about real problems.” ― Epictetus---Hello friends! Thanks for listening. Want to take these principles to the next level? Join the Stoic Coffee House Community!  Stop by the website at stoic.coffee where you can sign up for our newsletter, and buy some great looking shirts and hoodies at the Stoic Coffee Shop. Like the theme song? You can find it here from my alter ego. :)Find me on instagram, twitter, or threadsLastly if you know of someone that would benefit from or appreciate this podcast, please share it. Word of mouth is the best way to help this podcast grow. Thanks again for listening. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

“Don't just say you have read books. Show that through them you have learned to think better, to be a more discriminating and reflective person. Books are the training weights of the mind. They are very helpful, but it would be a bad mistake to suppose that one has made progress simply by having internalized their contents." ― Epictetus---Hello friends! Thanks for listening. Want to take these principles to the next level? Join the Stoic Coffee House Community!  Stop by the website at stoic.coffee where you can sign up for our newsletter, and buy some great looking shirts and hoodies at the Stoic Coffee Shop. Like the theme song? You can find it here from my alter ego. :)Find me on instagram, twitter, or threadsLastly if you know of someone that would benefit from or appreciate this podcast, please share it. Word of mouth is the best way to help this podcast grow. Thanks again for listening. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.