Rest – a Pathway for Healing the Nervous System

Your face brings all the shadows out of me

This is a line from the song, Rest, which was first recorded 20 years ago! In 2006, I had the privilege of recording an album for the first time in my life.  It is quite an amazing story as I was 39 at the time and thought I was too old to fulfill a childhood dream.  But doors opened beyond my doing and I found myself given the opportunity.

I had been leading Evenings of Sung Prayers in the Fraser Valley for around five years at the time, and the CEO of Communitas Supportive Care, Steve Thiessen, attended one of these services.  He was so touched by the event, that he invited some of us to consider an album which would be funded through their organization and used as a fund-raiser. (How times have changed with the music industry!)  This opened a door and a dream began to live.

At the same time that we began to record, I had an experience of great frustration.  Some of this story is told in the book, Walk with Me, Transformation through the Path of Spiritual Direction.

“I was freer in many ways and had begun to write music for the first time in years and share my creativity with the community I was a part of.  I was in the process of recording the first album of my life. It was incredibly exciting for me after so much turmoil and pain, but one day an old wound reared its head up again.  I felt I was back where I had started, and I felt sorry for myself.  Out of sorts and anxious, I reached out to a friend for support.  This person responded with these words: “Cathy, rest.”  Rest?  Rest?  This response to my request for help made me feel very angry.  How dare you tell me to rest when I am struggling! How dare you tell me to rest when I need support!

What unfolded next was an encounter with Mystery – where, when I rested, I was given a profound invitation to the gaze of Love.  The image that came when I rested was of a Mother Bird, gazing at me with so much kindness and joy.  She met my anxiety with so much peace.  There was no frenetic energy in her, only a deep rest rooted in joy.  This experience evoked the writing of the song, Rest, which then became the name of the album.  This beautiful album held the harp music of Karin Dart and inspirational songs of Taize.  We were unable to continue printing this album, but it reached many people for the duration of time we had.  It can be found on spotify under gemma & co. 

The concept of ‘rest’ as spiritual practice, as a foundational way of being, became rooted in me at that time, and ultimately foundational for the development of Soul Care.  Without rest, there is no attentiveness, no pause to allow one’s nervous system to soften and open.  Pausing and breathing allow our nervous systems to move out of a defensive and protective posture, and open to grace.  When we are moving and on the alert we are unable to receive what is possible.  The Polyvagal Theory, a landmark study by Stephen W. Porges in the study of our nervous systems, says, “When detecting safety, physiology calms.  When detecting danger, physiology is activated for defence.”  In my work of listening to others lives, I have come to recognize that many of us live in activated states of defence.  Many are on high alert for danger and thus we have tremendous reactivity all around us.

Rooting ourselves in resting invites us to deactivate from defensiveness and tap into the inner wellspring of life.  Jesus said, “come to me all who are weary, and I will give you rest.”  There is a deep rest we can know when we align with the reality of the Christ presence, the presence of Pure Love.  This is the kind of presence our world needs.  But to carry this presence, we must receive it first.

I would love to share this song, Rest, with you, as re-recorded on the album, Remain in Love.  May we continue to allow rest to be where our roots lie and take time to receive the inspiration, nurture, and care we need, especially in times of tremendous turmoil, upheaval, and stress.  Love, Cathy