Shameless Leadership

Why do many women leaders freeze in high-stakes moments even when they know exactly what to say? If this is you, you’re definitely not alone. This episode breaks down what is really happening in these moments and the communication skills gap that holds women back in leadership: the freeze response, the over-explanation, and the impulse to soften a message until it loses all its power. If you're a woman in leadership who (like many of my clients and me!) has ever walked out of a crucial conversation feeling like you left something unsaid, this one is for you. In this episode, we explore: Why the freeze response shows up for women leaders - and why it's not a confidence problem The hidden cost of over-explaining in high-stakes moments (and how it undermines your executive presence) How workplace communication patterns are shaped by social conditioning, not capability What emotional intelligence actually looks like when the pressure is on Practical tools for women leaders to show up with clarity and authority in crucial conversations How to release perfectionism and control when the stakes are high The impulse to shut down is a default that is not serving you. While it may be a deeply ingrained protection mechanism, it’s preventing you from taking up the space you deserve to own. It’s time to set some new defaults so you can hold any conversation, articulate your thoughts even when uncomfortable, and trust yourself to share your ideas in a way that calls people in. With just a few simple steps, you can begin to set new defaults to stay present, nimble, and assertive in high-stakes moments. Links Mentioned: Free Workshop on April 16th: Trust Your Voice: Communicate with Courage When the Stakes Are High: https://saradean.com/trust Hire Sara to speak: saradean.com/speaking Coach with Sara: https://saradean.com/executive-coaching-services Connect with Sara on LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/in/saradeanspeaks Watch Shameless Leadership episodes on YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/@saradeanspeaks Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

If you’ve ever wondered how to improve communication skills without overthinking it, this is for you. I’m breaking down simple, practical ways to strengthen your communication skills so you can create deeper connections in your everyday conversations. Through small, intentional shifts, like acknowledging people in real time, expressing genuine gratitude, and demonstrating active listening, the way you engage with others can instantly become more human, humane, and impactful. Effective communication isn’t about saying more, it’s about being more intentional with what you say, how you say it, and how you consistently show up - especially in moments where others are experiencing highs and lows. In this episode, I walk through how to build communication skills that actually translate into stronger relationships - whether you’re leading a team, growing a business, or navigating personal dynamics. These are the same tools my current coaching clients use to advance their leadership communication (with great success) while modeling clarity, confidence, and authenticity. From asking better questions to mirroring and validating others, these “micro-moments” of communication are all it takes to shift conversations from surface-level chit chat to meaningful interactions that build trust, safety, and belonging. Every one of these communication habits contributes to real trust building, the kind that solidifies psychological safety, reduces defensiveness, and helps people feel seen, valued, and understood. When you consistently communicate this way, you don’t just get better at conversations; you become someone people trust, respect, and want to engage with. Links Mentioned: Hire Sara to speak: saradean.com/speaking Coach with Sara: https://saradean.com/executive-coaching-services Connect with Sara on LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/in/saradeanspeaks Watch Shameless Leadership episodes on YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/@saradeanspeaks Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

Sometimes the biggest obstacle holding you back in your work and leadership isn’t related to your skillset at all. It’s your mindset. When your mindset is your obstacle, there is usually a pretty straight line to your dissatisfaction, and perhaps even hopelessness. This isn’t an indication you’re doing anything wrong. You’re human. You’re probably tired and overwhelmed. You feel short on time, energy, and resources. You start questioning yourself. The pressure builds, the stakes feel higher, and suddenly the voice of doubt gets louder than the voice of truth. In those moments, it’s easy for your mindset to become more harmful than helpful. In these moments, you need a mindset reset - an often subtle but powerful shift in how you’re thinking, interpreting, and responding to what’s in front of you. Mindset shifts are where your power lives because they change how you show up in real time. Your mindset informs your habits, behaviors, and thinking. Your mindset allows you to access clarity when things feel messy, confidence when fear is loud, and grounded leadership when everything around you feels uncertain. When hope or belief starts to waver, it’s not a sign to pull back; it’s an invitation to lead yourself differently. The women who become the most powerful, steady, and trusted leaders aren’t the ones who avoid difficult moments; they’re the ones who learn how to think their way through them with intention. In this episode, I walk you through the top 5 mindset shifts powerful women leaders make when the going gets tough. These mindset resets will allow you to take back your power even when you may not have the control you want over a situation or outcomes. This is an invitation to help yourself before you wreck yourself and to consistently maintain the kind of thinking you need to KEEP GOING in sticky moments and seasons. Links Mentioned: Hire Sara to speak: saradean.com/speaking Coach with Sara: https://saradean.com/executive-coaching-services Connect with Sara on LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/in/saradeanspeaks Watch Shameless Leadership episodes on YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/@saradeanspeaks Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

Emotional intelligence is that thing that most people agree is important but few understand how to develop. It can feel tricky - and vulnerable. In this episode, I’m breaking down emotional intelligence skills in a highly practical way. Most leaders assume EQ means “stay calm” or “be nice,” but real emotional intelligence is far more active than that. It’s a set of tangible skills that help you build trust, create psychological safety, and navigate the inevitable tension that comes with people working together. I’m sharing five emotional intelligence skills that I see leaders skip all the time - not because they don’t care, but because no one ever taught them how to actually practice these skills in real moments. Listen in as I walk you through the difference between noticing emotions and naming them, suppressing reactions versus regulating them, and why reading the emotional undercurrent of a room matters just as much as managing the agenda. I share examples from my own leadership experiences, including moments when I’ve felt nervous before stepping on stage for a keynote and how I manage that in real time. I also talk about two of the more challenging leadership skills: holding space without immediately trying to fix someone’s problem, and repairing ruptures when things don’t go the way you intended. People make mistakes. Conversations get messy. What builds real psychological safety isn’t avoiding those moments; it’s how you show up afterward. These five skills are simple and transformative. When leaders practice them consistently, teams feel safer, communication improves, and belonging becomes something people actually experience instead of something written in a company value statement. Emotional intelligence isn’t about perfection. It’s about recognizing and honoring what’s happening inside you and around you, and then choosing how to respond in a way that protects trust and connection. Links Mentioned: Hire Sara to speak: saradean.com/speaking Coach with Sara: https://saradean.com/executive-coaching-services Connect with Sara on LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/in/saradeanspeaks Watch Shameless Leadership episodes on YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/@saradeanspeaks Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

Ambition looks different for every woman. In this episode, we dive into the questions ambitious women ask themselves to define success on their own terms. Whether you're navigating leadership challenges as a woman leader or redefining your personal growth journey, these self-reflection prompts will help you clarify what ambition means to you in this season and set goals that actually align with your current life. This is also a chance for you to identify who your ambition serves and whether or not your current ambition actually serves YOU or not. While women talk a lot about how to be ambitious, we don’t talk nearly enough about how to be ambitious in a way that feels personally aligned and sustainable. In this conversation, I unpack the quiet, powerful habits of ambitious women - the ones that often go unnoticed, such as intentionally turning down opportunities, strategic rest, and protecting your reputation over popularity. If you suspect you might benefit from a stronger success mindset or ambition mindset without sacrificing your health, relationships, or integrity, this episode will give you practical reflection questions to guide your goal setting on your own terms. This is a chance for you to explore what it really means to define your ambition by your season of life, detach your worth from outcomes, and build a version of success that reflects who you are now and who you are becoming. Links Mentioned: Hire Sara to speak: saradean.com/speaking Coach with Sara: https://saradean.com/executive-coaching-services Connect with Sara on LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/in/saradeanspeaks Watch Shameless Leadership episodes on YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/@saradeanspeaks Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

What if your team isn’t getting along as well as you think? What if… they’re just hiding? In this episode of Shameless Leadership, we’re talking about what your team might be hiding behind a facade of niceness and seemingly quiet contentment. When employees don’t feel psychological safety, they edit themselves, downplay ideas, avoid disagreement, and stay quiet in meetings. Silence gets mistaken for alignment. Politeness gets labeled as trust. But often, it’s fear. Fear-based compliance is one of the earliest warning signs of a toxic work environment. Psychological safety isn’t soft. It’s a measurable leadership skill and a foundational component of leadership development. When people don’t feel safe to challenge ideas, admit mistakes, or raise concerns, innovation slows, engagement drops, and diverse voices disappear first. The cost isn’t just emotional, it’s operational. If you care about performance, retention, and long-term results, psychological safety must be a strategic priority as you intentionally build out your team culture. In this episode, I share a simple 5-question Psychological Safety Audit you can run anonymously with your team to assess whether they are masking behind fear. The data may surprise you. Because masking doesn’t always look dramatic - it often looks like professionalism, harmony, and “everyone gets along great”. But underneath that surface, your culture may be training people to stay small, even if inadvertently. If you want to strengthen psychological safety and prevent a toxic work environment, you must lower the social cost of honesty. That means rewarding thoughtful dissent, staying regulated when challenged, and modeling curiosity instead of defensiveness. Your reactions shape your team culture more than the values on your wall. If people are masking, it’s not a performance problem. It’s a leadership opportunity for you to solve. Links Mentioned: Shameless Leadership Episode 930: The Hidden Costs of Women Masking at Work TED Talk: Dare To Disagree: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=PY_kd46RfVE Hire Sara to speak: saradean.com/speaking Coach with Sara: https://saradean.com/executive-coaching-services Connect with Sara on LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/in/saradeanspeaks Watch Shameless Leadership episodes on YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/@saradeanspeaks Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

I was recently given the opportunity to step into some volunteer work at Cristo Rey Jesuit High School in Seattle. While I suspected I would find this work meaningful and enjoyable, I didn’t expect to be so overwhelmingly impressed with every aspect of the Cristo Rey mission and how their work is setting up students to be incredible leaders from such a young age. As this work has quickly become very near and dear to my heart, I thought it would be fun to have a different kind of leadership conversation here on the show. I asked Katie Seltzer, the Vice President of Corporate Work Study at Cristo Rey, to join me. Katie Seltzer leads the expansion of Cristo Rey’s signature (and truly exceptional) Corporate Work Study Program. In her role, Katie nurtures strategic partnerships with employers, ensuring students gain meaningful, real-world professional experience while earning toward the cost of their education. She is committed to preparing students from limited economic means for success in college and career through intentional mentorship, professional development, and high-expectation work placements. Katie’s journey with Cristo Rey Jesuit Seattle began as Feasibility Study Director, helping assess and mobilize support for the school’s launch in Seattle. In 2022, she relocated to Seattle to lead the foundational work of opening the new Cristo Rey Jesuit High School, collaborating with volunteers, donors, business leaders, families, and community leaders to bring the mission to open its doors in 2024. She holds a Master's degree from both Harvard Divinity School and Harvard’s Graduate School. Originally from the East Coast, she calls Queen Anne home now with her husband and six-year-old son. Listen in to hear Katie share: How she connects her family’s three generations of educational values to her work, impact, and service today Her commitment to expanding equitable outcomes and what that looks like in action in her current VP role Cristo Rey’s unique educational model built on service, mentorship, and sponsorship What it looks like when work and leadership opportunities are integrated into high school education programming The significance of providing a culture of belonging in Fortune 500 companies for young people who commonly face barriers to belonging A systems thinking approach to leadership legacy that layers youth leadership, educational leadership, and organizational leadership The power of dismantling systemic barriers to provide opportunity and advancement in your community and workplaces Links Mentioned: Watch the Cristo Rey Draft Day 2025 video: https://www.cristoreyseattle.org/corporate-work-study/cws-draft-day-2025 Learn more about Cristo Rey Jesuit Seattle: cristoreyseattle.org Learn more about the Cristo Rey Network: cristoreynetwork.org Connect with Katie on LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/in/katie-seltzer Hire Sara to speak: saradean.com/speaking Coach with Sara: https://saradean.com/executive-coaching-services Connect with Sara on LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/in/saradeanspeaks Watch Shameless Leadership episodes on YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/@saradeanspeaks Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

Perhaps we need to stop celebrating resilience. Because we may actually be celebrating toxic resilience. Hear me out. In the corporate world, telling a woman she is resilient is often just a polite way of saying, “We are going to give you an impossible workload, broken systems, and no support… and we expect you to smile through it.” In fact, if you’re complimenting my resilience, I may question if you were complicit in building and upholding the systems that made my resilience mandatory when yours was not. Somewhere along the way, resilience became high praise for women in leadership. But too often it’s code for “Figure it out, we’re not going to fix this.” Women are expected to absorb dysfunction, manage emotional labor, navigate bias, and hold everything together without complaint. When resilience becomes a requirement instead of a choice, it stops being empowering and starts being extractive. The truth is, many women develop extraordinary resilience not because they lack capability, but because they are operating inside systems that demand more from them than from their male counterparts. They are expected to be competent but warm, assertive but not threatening, and ambitious but endlessly accommodating. So they adapt. They endure. They carry. And then they’re praised for how well they survive conditions that were never equitable to begin with. But endurance is not the same as leadership strength. Endurance drains creativity, dulls voice, and quietly normalizes what should actually be challenged. Resilience is an important skill, but it should not be constantly taxed. Real leadership isn’t about how much you can tolerate - it’s about what you’re willing to transform. Instead of asking women to be more resilient, we should be asking why the system requires so much resilience in the first place. Sustainable leadership includes boundaries, advocacy, and the courage to disrupt what isn’t working. Sometimes the most powerful move a woman can make isn’t proving she can handle it. It’s refusing to carry what was never hers to hold. Links Mentioned: Hire Sara to speak: saradean.com/speaking Coach with Sara: https://saradean.com/executive-coaching-services Connect with Sara on LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/in/saradeanspeaks Watch Shameless Leadership episodes on YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/@saradeanspeaks Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

How often do you take action in a way that makes you think, “This is going to get me where I want to go!” My guess is that you’re not taking these kinds of strategic action steps often enough, AND you’re probably taking many other action steps each day that are not helping advance your career growth. In fact, you may be stuck in a vicious (exhausting?!) cycle of over-giving, over-producing, and over-proving yourself without any long-term benefit to your career. In this episode, I’m sharing five leadership skills that truly accelerate women’s careers - not in a hustle-harder, fix-yourself way - but in a grounded, strategic, and sustainable way. Too often, women are given vague advice like “just be more confident” or “speak up more,” without being taught the actual skills that create visibility, influence, and momentum. This episode is about naming the skills that actually move the needle in your career advancement and then making them actionable. This is especially for women who are doing great work and still feel stuck or overlooked. I walk through five specific skills that I’ve seen make a real difference over and over again: strategic self-advocacy, clear and confident communication (especially in high-stakes moments), intentional relationship-building, navigating power and bias without losing yourself, and setting boundaries that protect both your energy and your credibility. I talk honestly about the traps women are often socialized into, such as self-sacrificing, waiting to be noticed, staying quiet to stay “likable,” and how these skills help you move out of those patterns without becoming someone you’re not. This conversation is for women at any stage of their career who want to lead with more intention, influence, and ease. My hope is that as you listen, you’ll identify one skill that feels especially relevant right now - one lever you can pull that creates momentum instead of burnout. Leadership isn’t about perfection or a dazzling personality; it’s about practicing the skills that help you be seen, heard, and valued for the leader you already are, so that when the right opportunity opens up, you are well-positioned to step right into it. Links Mentioned: Hire Sara to speak: saradean.com/speaking Coach with Sara: https://saradean.com/executive-coaching-services Connect with Sara on LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/in/saradeanspeaks Watch Shameless Leadership episodes on YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/@saradeanspeaks Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices