Ocean Mind Sangha

What does it mean to open into, trust reality, instead of trying to force things into being? How do we reconcile accepting the things we cannot change with changing the things we cannot accept? Zuisei explores the possibility of seeing things as they are, learning to work with this truth instead of against it, and basing this work on the realization of our interbeing.

The term mindfulness is ubiquitous these days. But its origins can be traced back to the teachings of the Buddha, whose main practice was anapanasati, “mindfulness of breathing.” In this interview, Zuisei Godddard discusses some of the misunderstandings of mindfulness, as well as its true potential to help us cultivate awareness, wisdom, and compassion.

“What I saw or heard or felt came not but from myself—and there I found myself more truly and more strange.” —Wallace Stevens Zuisei Sensei speaks from the heart about her own spiritual journey and her ongoing commitment to practice as she steps further into lay life.

Zuisei Goddard draws on the life of the Buddha to illustrate the six stages of pilgrimage—the call, homeleaving, the journey, contemplation, encounter, return. Pilgrimage is both an inner and outer journey; it is travel into the unknown for the purpose of knowing ourselves intimately and drawing closer to our understanding of the divine. It is realizing that at the end of a long sojourn, we return to the home that we never actually left.

We have to be willing to take a risk in order to see clearly. In this talk on case 31 of the Gateless Gate: Zhaozhou Saw Through the Old Woman, Zuisei speaks of the spiritual life as a perilous journey. “Every time we ask,” she says, “we expose ourselves. But when we don’t ask, we also expose ourselves. So we might as well take a risk—be wild and daring—and see what comes of it.”

For this Fusatsu (Renewal of Vows ceremony) Zuisei speaks of sacred space as the ground in which atonement and vow become possible. It is, to borrow Rabbi Abraham Joshua Heschel’s words, “A sanctuary in time”—a place and period which is both distinct from and equal to the everyday. A space full of possibility. Correction: The opening quote, attributed to Charles Chu, is actually by Margaret Gibson.

We are never practicing alone—not in the darkest pit of hell, not in the brightest state of bliss. When we know this, the natural response is to bring forth our buddha ancestors and look at them in veneration. We formally bow and meet them, which is none other than meeting ourselves. Zuisei and Hojin Sensei speak about the importance of honoring and connecting to our ancestors in spiritual practice. This talk was given at Zen Mountain Monastery’s Annual Women’s Sesshin, Wild Grasses.

“Prajna Paramita is unguarded, but she is not naïve. She is ferocious and kind, both strong and soft. And when she becomes embodied in one of us, she is none other than who we are. She knows the ground upon which she stands, and she does not fail to cover it.” How do we reconcile the systemic harm perpetuated through the construction of gender with the ultimate truth of selflessness? In this talk, Zuisei speaks about reclamation of identity as a form of embodiment of Prajna Paramita, wisdom beyond wisdom.

Zuisei speaks of that which is beyond ordinary knowing and must be known intimately. As she puts it, devoting our full attention to the breath or a koan can be an act of love. Zazen itself is that act of love, an act rewarded in ways we cannot predict.

In part two of this talk on Gateless Gate 41, Zuisei speaks on the five overarching disturbing emotions: attachment, pride, envy, anger, and ignorance, and the collective journey we are on to wake up to these patterns and remember our innate goodness. As the Buddha said, all of his teachings were for the purpose of seeing the truth of suffering and its cessation. The way to put at end to suffering is to realize ourselves, but we cannot do it while caught in the storm of strong emotions. So we need to have a way to recognize and deal with them, and this is what so much of practice is about.

“We look out at the world and we see nothing but conflict, nothing but clamor and strife and forces that seem to feed on our discontent. And we think, how can I be at ease in the midst of all this?” In this talk on Gateless Gate 41, Zuisei speaks on waking up to the state of our minds and the ongoing journey of cultivating ease and peace in the midst of all that life brings us.

In the third talk in a series on the Three Essentials of Zen, Zuisei speaks on the third essential: Great Determination. Zuisei explains that Determination is not an obsessive nor heroic quality, but rather, it is our humble, steadfast commitment to waking up— through the good, bad, and mundane. “[Great Determination] knows what it is capable of. It knows— without even knowing how we know— that this path is not only walkable, but that we will do it, that we are doing it.”

Great Doubt is one of the Three Essentials of Zen practice — wherein doubt is not flaky nor pessimistic, but rather a commitment to an ongoing investigation of: what’s really going on here? In this dharma talk, Zuisei explores doubt and how the cultivation of this quality leads us to a deeper understanding of the way things are.

In this first talk in a series on the Three Essentials of Zen, Zuisei speaks on the first essential: great faith, discussing the four stages of faith and the role that they play as we commit to the dharma. To have faith is to trust, and to let that trust guide us along our path as it unfolds. It is believing in our goodness, in the teachings, and in our communities—trusting that they will support us in the process of awakening.

When we practice working with our minds, we quickly discover the immense impacts our thoughts have on our lived reality. And when we look at this using the framework of the Buddhist perspective, we come to understand the relationship between mind and reality even more profoundly: that reality itself is really just the minds’ projection. In this talk, Zuisei reflects on Gateless Gate, 26: Two Monks Roll Up the Blinds. Zuisei draws on the power that the classical Buddhist teachings have to help us understand the depths and paradoxes of our experiences.

In this talk, Zuisei shares teachings on contemplating and feeling into the body’s experience of aliveness as practices of awareness and dharma. Through understanding our experiences through the five aggregates, (form, sensation, conception, discrimination, and awareness) we practice opening ourselves to the fundamental interconnectedness of this body, to all.

“If you meet a person of the Way on the way, greet them with neither words nor with silence. Now tell me, how will you greet them?” In this talk, Zuisei speaks on a koan that helps us to reflect on how we regard and interact with others on the path. She asks: If we do not greet one another with words nor with silence, what is the ground that we meet each other on?

Through the practice of zazen, we come to see the unruliness of our minds more intimately. In this talk, Zuisei speaks on the arising of “no”— the “not this” aspect of our practice that allows for discernment and the continual practice of turning towards a more ultimate truth. And after all the “nos”, Zuisei says, there comes a “yes”— an opening to infinite possibility and freedom. “All of these ‘nos’ are so we can get to ‘yes.’ ‘Yes’ on which not just the future, but this world and every world depends. This is what we’re doing in seshin, nodding our yes’s, so we can get to that final, that incontrovertible yes.”

Zuisei speaks on the Buddha’s Eight Conditions for Wisdom: studying, asking, withdrawal, ethical conduct, learning and reflecting on the teachings, energy, right speech, and understanding the rise and fall of the five aggregates. These eight conditions give us the ability to see things more clearly and allow us to cultivate the space to hold the knowing of our inherent goodness. Through cultivating wisdom, we are able to accept where we are with more grace and love.

Do we choose the course of our lives, or is it divinely chosen for us? In this talk, Zuisei explores the age-old question of the relationship between pre-determination and free will using the support of the Buddha’s teachings coupled with wisdom from other spiritual and philosophical traditions. Zuisei says that regardless of the cause and effects of our circumstances, we do have the ability to choose how we respond to what happens to us. Through cultivating awareness of our actions, we can be of benefit to ourselves and others—whether that’s in the present moment, or for lifetimes to come.

“The Incalculable” is a chapter in the Avatamsaka or Flower Garland Sutra whose purpose is to blow open our ideas of reality. In this talk, Zuisei uses this chapter, as well as readings from Hildegard of Bingen, Master Dogen’s “Sound of the Valley Streams” and excerpts of the modern mystic’s Flora Cortois’ record of her enlightenment experience to speak of the beauty and extraordinary nature of our most ordinary moments.

The more we practice, the more open-hearted we become, and the more able we are to practice boundless generosity. Cultivating bodhicitta— the awakening heart—calls us to let go of our conditional giving and well-wishing, and invites us to practice extending our generosity without restraint. In this talk, Zuisei speaks on what it means to give boundlessly and wakefully, and to give what the sutras consider the most significant gift: the gift of fearlessness.

In the second half of her talk on Suchness, Zuisei speaks further on the nature of reality and our place in it. “Our lives are just long enough for us to ask, ‘What is this?’ and to find an answer to that question. But they are too short not to ask at all.”

Do we know things as they truly are, or as our ideas and perceptions of what they might be? In this talk, Zuisei speaks on a concept from Yogachara’s philosophies of consciousness , wherein the first field of perception is the “field of suchness”— where we perceive reality directly. Cultivating this discernment between truth and perception is an ongoing practice— one that ultimately opens us up to liberation.

“As long as human beings have walked on this earth, there have always been those who’ve said, ‘This is not the way. This isn’t working, it’s never worked. So let me spend my life looking for another way. Let me spend my life living another way.” In this talk, Zuisei speaks on waking up from our conditioned sleepwalking to find the innate wonder that life has to offer. Through watering seeds of practice and presence, we choose wakefulness and seek truth.

The call to turn inward, towards our present-moment experience, is a call toward truth. In this talk, Zuisei explores the importance of letting our minds become still, so that when the call arrives, we can heed it. Accepting the call is saying “Yes” to reality. It’s becoming intimate with that which we know to be true, which then allows us to see how we must respond.”

What is the role of inner transformation in a journey towards a more peaceful and just world? How does the cultivation of mindfulness and wisdom lead us towards right action, as individuals and as a collective? In this talk, Zusei speaks on the power of meditation to call us forth to wise change-making. “‘My actions are my only true belongings,” the Buddha said. “My actions are the ground upon which I stand.” So what ground will we choose to stand on? What will we leave in our path?”

Zuisei speaks of silence as the way of wonder, humility, and reverence; of noble silence as the unification of awareness. Drawing on stories and poems, she highlights the importance of silence in our increasingly noisy and harried world.

In the eighth talk in a series on the Eight Awarenesses of Enlightened Beings, Zuisei speaks on the seventh awareness: cultivating wisdom. Wisdom is the highest state we can obtain on the path—a complete integration of presence, compassion, and equanimity. It is understanding that all things—all things without exception—are impermanent, unsatisfactory, and devoid of self-nature. But this is not a problem. Wisdom is accepting, and therefore finding freedom in the fact that this is how things are.

In the seventh talk in a series on the Eight Awarenesses of Enlightened Beings, Zuisei speaks on the eighth awareness: avoiding idle talk (she changed the order of the talks in order to end with wisdom). Master Dogen said, “To totally know the true form of all things is the same as being without idle talk.” In that complete knowing, there is no room, no opportunity, for idle talk. Knowing the true form of a thing, there is no one to speak about it idly, or to speak about it at all. Words cannot express the reality. Live words can point to it, but they are not it. And yet, since we have to speak, how do we do so in such a way that we practice abstaining from thought and language that keeps us bound? How do we create space to rest in a deeper sense of knowing and trusting in our innate goodness?

In this mondo or question-and-answer session, Zuisei Sensei speaks on the Fifth Awareness of Enlightened Beings: not forgetting right thought. To not forget right thought is to protect and maintain the dharma and abide in the Three Treasures. And by extension, this “not forgetting” can be understood as remembering. As Zuisei explains: “Not forgetting right thought is remembering: This is not mine, I am not this, this is not myself. This— whatever this is—is not apart from me. It is not a thing, and neither am I. This means I cannot possess it, but I also cannot lose it. This means I already have everything I need.”

In the fifth talk in a series on the Eight Awarenesses of Enlightened Beings, Zuisei speaks on the sixth awareness: practicing Samadhi. Samadhi, also understood as single-pointed focus, is an access point of profound awareness. With intent presence, we are able to see the arising and passing of all phenomena. Samadhi is the state in which subject and object merge. We become the breath, the koan, awareness itself.

In the fourth talk in a series on the Eight Awarenesses of Enlightened Beings, Zuisei speaks on the fourth awareness: exerting meticulous effort. Rather than over-exertion, this awareness calls us to place thoughtful intent upon what and how we practice, and it asks us that we dedicate ourselves fully to this effort. The more intent and dedication we put forth, the easier it is to abide in a space of freedom.

In the third talk in a series on the Eight Awarenesses of Enlightened Beings, Zuisei speaks on the third awareness: enjoying serenity and tranquility. Serenity, or equanimity, is a quality that the Buddha spoke of frequently. As a state of mind that fosters non-attachment, equanimity gives us the ability to be grounded, stable, and capable of holding the totality of our experience, whatever that is. Being equanimous doesn’t mean not feeling or not caring. On the contrary, it encourages us to care deeply without being disturbed by that caring. It means not being in conflict with one’s thoughts and emotions, with adverse circumstances, with others. Fundamentally, it comes from seeing others as ourselves.

In this second talk in a series on the Eight Awarenesses of Enlightened Beings, Zuisei speaks on the second awareness: knowing how to be satisfied. In a Western culture that seems obsessed with excess and consumption, it can be a struggle to know when we are truly satisfied. Yet when we practice and take a closer look at our minds and hearts, we may find that we already have all that we need.

In this first talk in a series on the Eight Awarenesses of Enlightened Beings, Zuisei speaks on the first awareness: having few desires. The Buddha did not say have no desires. As humans, desire will occur—and discerning when it is skillful and unskillful is the practice. We don’t vow every day to put an end to desires because desires are bad. We’re vowing to put an end to that which gets in the way of living our lives fully. Because doing this is the most natural way to live a human life.

In this introductory talk to a series of eight talks on the Eight Awarenesses of Enlightened Beings, Zuisei calls forth the need to investigate this last teaching of the Buddha, according to Mahayana Buddhism. Through studying the qualities of an enlightened being, we are able to sense the possibility of liberation that is available to us all. “These sutras are describing in a very vivid way , the most vivid way, the universe inside,” Zuisei Sensei says. “They speak of that place where there is no question—no question whatsoever—that you belong. Because if you yourself are the whole universe, how could you not belong?”

This talk, given the day after the 2017 Women’s March on Washington, speaks of the importance of transcending the labels of political, social, or environmental action to take care, through simple, compassionate human action, of the most pressing issues facing us today.

In this talk, Zuisei speaks on the power of silence and stillness to connect us to the present moment and the truth of things . In a world where we are increasingly disconnected from presence, silence is a tool—a technology, if you will—to come back to ourselves. “Silence and stillness are the ground from which clear movement and action springs forth,” Sensei says. “To be still and silent is not to be passively waiting, it is to be full with the potential of now.”

In this talk, Zuisei speaks on the third of the Four Immeasurables— sympathetic joy. Cultivating sympathetic joy asks us to feel joy, feel joy with and for others, and to recognize the interconnected nature of our happiness.“There are times when being glad at someone else’s happiness requires that we do more than just have the wish for their happiness. It requires that we act to bring about their happiness, bring about their joy. Because when even a single atom, quark, of [a] cell gets affected— everything is.”

Equanimity is the fourth of the Four Immeasurables, four virtues that also include loving-kindness, compassion, and sympathetic joy.In this pointed talk after the 2016 presidential election, Zuisei speaks of equanimity in relationship to the practice of taking refuge in the Three Treasures of Buddha, Dharma, and Sangha. She also offers an expression of welcome that became incorporated into Zen Mountain Monastery’s Inclusion Statement.

Drawing upon both Buddhist teachings and Christian tradition, in this talk, Zuisei invites us into ritual of affirming our own existence— owning our strength, practicing gratitude for aliveness, and standing in our divine power. “What mighty strength is causing you to arise today and everyday? What miraculous power is responsible for your existence? Allowing you to be here now, in this time and place, in this opportunity?”

Compassion, or Karuna, is the second of the Four Immesurables, and is described as the wish that all beings experience happiness and well-being. Yet the wish for others to be well is not a passive “hoping” — but a deep recognition that our suffering is bound inextricably to the suffering of others. Compassion calls us to love not from a place of charity, but from a place of recognizing our shared humanity. Zuisei says: “Buddhism says all beings are interdependent, which means we’re more than equal. We are one and the same. Great beings with many hands and eyes. We are Avalokiteshvara, the Bodhisattva of Compassion, the one who hears the cries of the world. The one who responds to that which needs to be taken care of, that needs to be healed.”

Lovingkindness, the wishing of happiness to ourselves and others, is the first of the Four Immeasurables. In this talk, Zuisei explores what it means to embody lovingkindness in a world that can be harsh, isolating, and far from “kind.” We all have within us the capacity to be kind and loving— states of being that are actually intrinsic— we are just too often conditioned out of it in our dominant culture. Yet life is too short to not work towards cultivating these qualities, or, remembering how to inhabit them.

This talk is part two of two exploring the Fourth Bodhisattva Vow: The Buddha Way is unattainable; I vow to attain it. In this talk, Zuisei elaborates on the importance of letting go of our desire for a future state or an outside thing, and to instead come into our direct experience—to open to what is right here. She says, “Instead of putting our effort on attaining, we focus on practicing. Instead of having living in our out of fear of what might be, we focus on living.”

This talk is part one of two on the fourth Bodhisattva Vow: The Buddha Way is unattainable; I vow to attain it. To commit to this path is to commit to walking a road without end—there is no finish line. And as Zuisei says, this is actually good news: “It’s exactly this vastness that leads to our sense of belonging, of rightness. Actually, it doesn’t lead to it— it is it.”

This talk explores the third Bodhisattva Vow: The dharmas are boundless; I vow to master them. To vow to master the dharmas is to undertake the commitment to studying the Way for our whole lives— understanding that despite the fact that we can never learn it all, it is our obligation to try. “I vow to be rent open, my heart laid bare. I vow to stand defenseless, yet awake in the face of reality. I vow to truly not know, that I may know ever more deeply. I vow to regard you, and when I can’t to regard you, and when I won’t, to regard you, and to let you regard me. Because I finally see that our lives depend on it.”

This talk explores the second Bodhisattva Vow: Desires are inexhaustible, I vow to put an end to them. Zuisei explains that this vow is not about suppressing what is pleasurable; rather, it asks us to look at how we cling to our desires and in turn create suffering for ourselves and others. This vow calls us to let go of conditioning that makes us feel separate, and instead to focus on our shared humanity so we can work toward building a just and equitable world.

This talk explores the first Bodhisattva Vow: Beings are numberless; I vow to save them. What does it mean to save another being? What does it mean to relieve someone else’s suffering? As Zuisei explains, “… a bodhisattva enables others to be released from suffering by releasing his or her own suffering. By recognizing another’s pain as my own pain…by trusting that the best medicine is to turn to another and ask, ‘How can I help you?’”

No one is free until everyone is free. To take the Bodhisattva Vows is to commit fully to liberating all beings—despite of the insurmountability of the notion of ending all suffering. In this introductory talk to a series exploring the Four Bodhisattva Vows, Zuisei explains why commitment to the path of a Bodhisattva is essential— why we cannot give up, even in a world with so much suffering and oppression. “To save the environment and this planet? Impossible. To establish racial, gender, sexual, and age equality? Impossible. To put an end to poverty and hunger? Impossible.” Yet we vow to fulfill these vows, because we understand it is the only way to free ourselves and others from suffering.