Not Another Heroine

Beware readers, this episode is way past R rated, but Deli Dan carried us through. Join us next week when we go back to some serious fantasy with Robin McKinley's "The Blue Sword."https://www.goodreads.com/book/show/199928276-the-love-of-my-afterlife

An easy, breezy Kindle Unlimited book is Katie’s pick this week - The Heir and the Spare by Kate Stradling. As Katie explains, “it’s a book,” so don’t get too excited (though to be fair, it was finished and had a surprisingly interesting twist at the end!)https://www.goodreads.com/book/show/57022919-the-heir-and-the-spareIf you're looking for something with similar vibes:Thorn by Intisar Khananihttps://www.goodreads.com/book/show/51265989-thornBitterblue by Kristin Cashorehttps://www.goodreads.com/book/show/12680907-bitterblueWarprize by Elizabeth Vaughanhttps://www.goodreads.com/book/show/78070.Warprize

The drinks are kicking in for part 2 - much needed for the scene we endure with Delphie's overexposure in athletic wear. https://www.goodreads.com/book/show/199928276-the-love-of-my-afterlife

Get your pumpkins out, readers, it's spooky season! And starting us off right, Jordan's pick this week is a new one for us both: contemporary horror romance. Despite the suggestive title, The Contortionist by Kathryn Ann Kingsley is all the right kinds of scary - and a 5 star read for Jordan!https://www.goodreads.com/book/show/54995584-the-contortionistFor similar vibes (but maybe less spooky):Ninth House by Leigh Bardugohttps://www.goodreads.com/book/show/43263680-ninth-houseThe Cruel Prince by Holly Blackhttps://www.goodreads.com/book/show/26032825-the-cruel-prince

It's a Good Morning America Book Club pick so not exactly our usual choice of books. Go into this story like you would a Hallmark movie and you'll have an enjoyable but mindless time. https://www.goodreads.com/book/show/199928276-the-love-of-my-afterlife

Katie undertakes the 2am drunk Taco Bell run that is Danielle Lori's mafia romance, The Sweetest Oblivion (somewhere off in the distance, Jordan scoffs at this title for the 37th time). Was it good? Eh. Was it edible? Also eh. Has Katie read it twice already? ... she pleads the fifth. https://www.goodreads.com/book/show/39083635-the-sweetest-oblivion

We're finally closing out The Winner's trilogy. To be honest readers, we skimmed this last book so we're wrapping the whole thing up in one episode - or half an episode - we spend the majority of the second half discussing fanfic ideas, the golden age of romantasy, and The Aragorn Upgrade.https://www.goodreads.com/series/119513-the-winner-s-trilogy

"It's basically two quirky weird people with baggage realizing their baggage works together, and that they make each other... like whole?" This week Jordan has us all crying in the club with her Netflix K-Drama, Mad For Each Other. Two weirdos falling in love? What more could you want?

The trauma continues in book two of Marie Rutkoski's phenomenal Winner's trilogy. We're only doing two episodes for this book, and one final episode for book three. The end is near readers!https://www.goodreads.com/series/119513-the-winner-s-trilogy

He's hot so therefore he *must* live - the alternate title of Katie's pick of the week, What Monstrous Gods by Rosamund Hodge (the same author as one of our pod books, Cruel Beauty!) Also, Katie kept saying Charlie Clearwater - it's Charlie Bowater. Charlie Clearwater is a weird combination of two Twilight characters, lol.https://www.goodreads.com/book/show/173953567-what-monstrous-godsAnd if you're looking for something similar, try:The Shadow and Bone Trilogy by Leigh Bardugohttps://www.goodreads.com/series/69714-the-shadow-and-bone-trilogyThe Familiar by Leigh Bardugohttps://www.goodreads.com/book/show/133286777-the-familiarHall of Smoke by H.M. Longhttps://www.goodreads.com/book/show/53759101-hall-of-smoke

The trauma continues in book two of Marie Rutkoski's phenomenal Winner's trilogy. We're only doing two episodes for this book, and one final episode for book three. The end is near readers!https://www.goodreads.com/series/119513-the-winner-s-trilogy

If you're looking for a soul cleanser after last week's pick left you feeling bloody, slutty and pathetic, Jordan's pick this week is all sunshine and butterflies in Song of the Six Realms by Judy Lin. https://www.goodreads.com/book/show/172979755-song-of-the-six-realmsFor similar vibes, try:Thorn by Intisar Khananihttps://www.goodreads.com/book/show/51265989-thornDaughter of the Moon Goddess by Sue Lynn Tanhttps://www.goodreads.com/book/show/57789637-daughter-of-the-moon-goddessThe Girl Who Fell Beneath the Sea by Axie Ohhttps://www.goodreads.com/book/show/56978100-the-girl-who-fell-beneath-the-sea

We are so excited to talk about this trilogy and we're going to talk a lot. The Winner's Curse came out in 2014, a year before ACOTAR, and it does not get the attention it deserves (especially when compared to books in the same genre).https://www.goodreads.com/book/show/16069030-the-winner-s-curse

Yes, you did read that right. Katie explored the terrifying wilds of fanfic land to bring you the mafia romance of your dreams (and the best part is it's free!), Bloody, Slutty and Pathetic by WhatMurdah. Word to the wise - it's a bit spicier and toxic than most our picks.https://archiveofourown.org/works/52884502

We are so excited to talk about this trilogy and we're going to talk a lot. The Winner's Curse came out in 2014, a year before ACOTAR, and it does not get the attention it deserves (especially when compared to books in the same genre).https://www.goodreads.com/book/show/16069030-the-winner-s-curse

What does Naomi Novik have to do with *checks notes* Blippi? Jordan's pick this week is A Deadly Education by Naomi Novik, otherwise known as "a fucked up Hogwarts run by Slytherins." Nice.https://www.goodreads.com/book/show/50548197-a-deadly-educationFor something similar, try:The Folk of the Air series by Holly Blackhttps://www.goodreads.com/series/159680-the-folk-of-the-air

We are so excited to talk about this trilogy and we're going to talk a lot. The Winner's Curse came out in 2014, a year before ACOTAR, and it does not get the attention it deserves (especially when compared to books in the same genre).https://www.goodreads.com/book/show/16069030-the-winner-s-curse

This week's pick is a little teaser of what's to come, i.e. full length episodes! Katie talks about The Winner's Curse by Marie Rutkoski (with a surprisingly coherent retelling of the plot) and Jordan re-remembers how bangin' it was - chaos ensues. https://www.goodreads.com/book/show/16069030-the-winner-s-curseIf you liked The Winner's Curse and are looking for something similar, try:The Bridge Kingdom by Danielle Jensenhttps://www.goodreads.com/book/show/53921926-the-bridge-kingdomRed Queen by Victoria Aveyardhttps://www.goodreads.com/book/show/22328546-red-queenRed Rising by Pierce Brownhttps://www.goodreads.com/book/show/15839976-red-rising

We were going to do the three parts but we got lost somewhere around kidnaping number five and so we're wrapping up the Trouble with Kings this week. https://www.goodreads.com/book/show/2878252-the-trouble-with-kingsOur next book has got us all worked up though. If you haven't read it yet, do not pass go, do not collect more TBRs, and go live in kindle jail until you finish this series.https://www.goodreads.com/book/show/16069030-the-winner-s-curse?ref=nav_sb_ss_1_18

Jordan's pick this week is a Kindle Unlimited sleeper - our favorite kinds of books! Think a splash of the Undying King (Grace Draven), with a hint of The Invisible Life of Addie LaRue (Victoria Schwab), all mixed in with the Age of Adeline and you have Peaches & Honey by R. Raeta!https://www.goodreads.com/book/show/198908916-peaches-honeyFor same same, but different:The Undying King by Grace Dravenhttps://www.goodreads.com/book/show/30753120-the-undying-kingThe Invisible Life of Addie LaRuehttps://www.goodreads.com/book/show/50623864-the-invisible-life-of-addie-larue

Are you a Mel or a Flian? This book was a bit troubling for us, in large part due to it's lackluster take on the same Crown/Court Duel plot points. Still better than The Fourth Wing though...Also, gentlemen: there are only two types of mustaches and you can't win with either. Our hero sure doesn't.https://www.goodreads.com/book/show/2878252-the-trouble-with-kingspsst....Fil-ee-en is not how you say her name. Bloopers at the end!

In this week's pick (and our first one back in the studio!), Katie hates on Julia Quinn's When He Was Wicked, otherwise known as Francesca's story and proceeds to talk about it for approximately .5 seconds of this 9 minute episode. Read literally anything else, and you'll be much happier.https://www.goodreads.com/book/show/110396.When_He_Was_Wicked

Something about an aunt, a sparkly fish, and a pirate ship?https://www.goodreads.com/book/show/133286777-the-familiar

Yes. We've regressed to butt humor with a sprinkling of philosophy. Welcome to part two.https://www.goodreads.com/book/show/133286777-the-familiar

A pick of the week in which Katie misunderstands a K-drama title and just assumes Jordan is feeling sentimental. And if you couldn't tell within the first 30 seconds of this episode, Katie was still very pregnant during it's recording (dollies anyone?) More importantly however, My Dearest, available on Viki, is hands down Jordan's favorite show - and if you even vaguely know her, you know thats quite the endorsement.

We are finally coming through on our promise to do "The Familiar" but brace yourselves readers. This book is like a trip to Whole Foods: expensive, snooty, and a little...fibrous...https://www.goodreads.com/book/show/133286777-the-familiar

We have to take a three-week-ish hiatus due to reasons you'll discover about 30 minutes in but we're checking in to let you know what's coming up this season, plus a little gossip about Bridgerton, The Idea of You, and some soul-shattering buzzfeed quizzes.*There wasn't enough time for all of our Bridgerton notes this episode so stick around after the credits for some extra Colin hate.Bride: https://www.goodreads.com/en/book/show/181344829Slaying the Vampire Conqueror: https://www.goodreads.com/en/book/show/123368729S.L. Viehl: https://www.goodreads.com/series/list/241301.Lynn_Viehl.htmlThe Idea of You: https://www.goodreads.com/en/book/show/31450913Howl's Moving Castle: https://www.goodreads.com/en/book/show/6294The Familiar: https://www.goodreads.com/en/book/show/133286777Ella Enchanted: https://www.goodreads.com/book/show/24337.Ella_EnchantedThe Quiz: https://www.buzzfeed.com/brooklyndee99/acotar-female-character-quiz

This week Katie does her... best... to describe the plot of Allison Saft's new book, A Fragile Enchantment (spoiler, she does an awful job). That being said, try this as an audiobook while doing a minimum of three other tasks, or just skip it all together...https://www.goodreads.com/en/book/show/127305900Some much better options include:Spin the Dawn by Elizabeth Limhttps://www.goodreads.com/en/book/show/42815556An Offer from a Gentleman by Julia Quinnhttps://www.goodreads.com/book/show/9408584-an-offer-from-a-gentlemanDaughter of the Forest by Juliet Marillierhttps://www.goodreads.com/en/book/show/13928

"I'm twenty-seven years old, I've no money and no prospects. I'm already a burden to my parents and I'm frightened. So don't you judge me, Lizzy."To everyone who has ever felt like Charlotte Lucas, we dedicate this episode to you.https://www.imdb.com/title/tt0414387/

Jordan's pick this week features warring shapeshifter kingdoms, and we bet you can guess what at least one of them shapeshifts into... (spoiler, its hawks.)https://www.goodreads.com/en/book/show/30334For similar picks, give these a try:Bride by Ali Hazelwoodhttps://www.goodreads.com/en/book/show/181344829Blood and Chocolate by Annette Curtis Klausehttps://www.goodreads.com/en/book/show/30324The Immortals Series by Tamora Piercehttps://www.goodreads.com/series/49863-the-immortalsOnce Upon a Broken Heart by Stephanie Garberhttps://www.goodreads.com/en/book/show/55987278

Do you like fanfic? How about Adam Driver? If you can suspend reality and fully embrace the ball of anxiety that is Olive's POV, then you'll enjoy Ali Hazelwood's breakout novel just as much as we did.https://www.goodreads.com/book/show/56732449-the-love-hypothesis 

Everthing is weirdly hostile and scary in Katie's pick this week, A Study in Drowning by Ava Reid. But reader beware, this book tastes best when enjoyed in the October/November time frame (if you want the full, spooky experinece.)https://www.goodreads.com/book/show/75302266-a-study-in-drowningAnd if you're looking for something similar:Ninth House by Leigh Bardugohttps://www.goodreads.com/book/show/43263680-ninth-houseDivine Rivals by Rebecca Rosshttps://www.goodreads.com/en/book/show/60784546House of Salt and Sorrows by Erin Craighttps://www.goodreads.com/en/book/show/39679076

Do you like fanfic? How about Adam Driver? If you can suspend reality and fully embrace the ball of anxiety that is Olive's POV, then you'll enjoy Ali Hazelwood's breakout novel just as much as we did.https://www.goodreads.com/book/show/56732449-the-love-hypothesis 

Interview with a what now? In Jordan's pick of the week, we're taking it back to the late 2000s, when Twilight was in theater, True Blood had everyone in a chokehold (maybe literally?), and vampires were the name of the game with Everymore by Lynn Viehl.https://www.goodreads.com/en/book/show/1264696Looking for something similar? Try -Bride by Ali Hazelwoodhttps://www.goodreads.com/en/book/show/181344829The Mercy Thompson series by Patricia Briggshttps://www.goodreads.com/series/40932-mercy-thompsonMaster of Crows by Grace Dravenhttps://www.goodreads.com/en/book/show/6811150

Do you like fanfic? How about Adam Driver? If you can suspend reality and fully embrace the ball of anxiety that is Olive's POV, then you'll enjoy Ali Hazelwood's breakout novel just as much as we did.https://www.goodreads.com/book/show/56732449-the-love-hypothesis 

This week, we get a full, 10 minute review of one of Katie's all time favorite books... but told with approximately .3 brain cells (or as Katie puts it, an old school computer not connected to the internet, i.e. calculator and minesweeper are about all that works.) - Uprooted by Naomi Novik, a 2015 Goodreads Choice Award nominee!https://www.goodreads.com/en/book/show/22544764If you've already read Uprooted, or are looking for something sorta similar:The Familiar by Leigh Bardugohttps://www.goodreads.com/en/book/show/133286777The Bear and the Nightingale by Katherine Ardenhttps://www.goodreads.com/book/show/25489134-the-bear-and-the-nightingaleDeathless by Catherynne M. Valentehttps://www.goodreads.com/book/show/8694389-deathless

We found this book to be somewhere in between 'stay up late' and 'meandering' but it is way better than the cover would lead you to believe. We recommend this as a bit of palate cleanser or a book to carry you through a reading lull. If you're interested in other stories set in this same world, check out Carissa Broadbent's "Crowns of Nyaxia" novella "Six Scorched Roses."https://www.goodreads.com/en/book/show/123368729 https://www.goodreads.com/book/show/123027751-six-scorched-roses?ref=nav_sb_ss_1_18 

Murder? Revenge? TIME TRAVEL? Jordan finishes an entire kdrama, and that should tell you exactly how good Marry My Husband is (and it's available on Amazon Prime!) Imagine: Girl gets cancer. Husband is unsupportive. All is going wrong in the world. Comes home to find husband and best friend cheating. Is murdered. Comes back 10 years earlier for the chance to have it all go differently. Ooh, sign me up.https://www.amazon.com/Marry-My-Husband-Season-1/dp/B0CPYQKXW5If you want something similar, Jordan recommends "The Glory" on Netflix, or "Perfect Mariage Revenge" on Viki.

We found this book to be somewhere in between 'stay up late' and 'meandering' but it is way better than the cover would lead you to believe. We recommend this as a bit of palate cleanser or a book to carry you through a reading lull. If you're interested in other stories set in this same world, check out Carissa Broadbent's "Crowns of Nyaxia" novella "Six Scorched Roses."https://www.goodreads.com/en/book/show/123368729 https://www.goodreads.com/book/show/123027751-six-scorched-roses?ref=nav_sb_ss_1_18 

This week, Katie rage quit a book... with 100 thousand reviews. And no, it's not Fourth WIng. We get three courses of beef (not the edible kind) with King of Battle and Blood by Scarlett St. Clair, an unintentional second DNF in a row for our VERY upset friend.https://www.goodreads.com/en/book/show/56651967If you too have been personally victimized by Regina George- I mean this book, try:Slaying the Vampire Conquerer by Carissa Broadbenthttps://www.goodreads.com/en/book/show/123368729Bride by Ali Hazelwoodhttps://www.goodreads.com/en/book/show/181344829Master of Crows by Grace Dravenhttps://www.goodreads.com/en/book/show/6811150

We wanted to like this book, the sample hooked us and the heroine seemed unique...until she wasn't. Freya's overwhelming lack of critical thinking combined with her obsession for an underwhelming himbo makes this book nothing more than trash fanfic of The Northman.https://www.goodreads.com/en/book/show/165940202

This week features the most awkward intro we've ever recorded (sorry in advance), and Jordan's frustration with Curses by Lish McBridge. Well written, interesting secondary characters, all wrapped up in a reverse Beauty in the Beast retelling: what's not to love? Well, for Jordan, a plot mechanism that lets the love interest see the heroine with the cursed lifted for a few hours (Gasp! She's actually beautiful? Now I can for sure love her!)https://www.goodreads.com/en/book/show/43207851If you're looking for something similar but with Jordan's stamp of approval, try:Thorn by Intisar Khananihttps://www.goodreads.com/en/book/show/51265989Beauty by Robin McKinleyhttps://www.goodreads.com/book/show/41424.BeautyTwo Monarchies Sequence by W.R. Gingellhttps://www.goodreads.com/series/176076-two-monarchies-sequence

We wanted to like this book, the sample hooked us and the heroine seemed unique...until she wasn't. Freya's overwhelming lack of critical thinking combined with her obsession for an underwhelming himbo makes this book nothing more than trash fanfic of The Northman.https://www.goodreads.com/en/book/show/165940202

In this week's pick, Katie talks about... a temple for jewish horses? (Try Chincoteague pony... horribly misprounced). If that sounds not really like a book you'd read, well Katie didn't either - this week's pick is a DNF, unfortunately, for A Far Wilder Magic by Allison Saft. https://www.goodreads.com/en/book/show/48909025If you're looking for something with similar vibes that Katie did enjoy, try:The Scorpio Races by Maggie Stiefvaterhttps://www.goodreads.com/book/show/10626594-the-scorpio-racesSorcery of Thorns by Margaret Rogersonhttps://www.goodreads.com/en/book/show/42201395What the River Knows by Isabel Ibañezhttps://www.goodreads.com/en/book/show/65213381

Readers, don't wait to watch this show. 'The Glory' (on Netflix) is a 16 episode k-drama featuring one of the most ruthless, intelligent heroines we've ever encountered. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=tqVVrTvrI8U

*DJ Khaled voice* ANOTHA ONE! And its a romantic version of... Mrs. Doubtfire? Nice try, Katie, but also weirdly, yes exactly. Sofi Laporte's Lady Avery and the False Bulter features a handsome rogue in hiding and a pissed off spinster who just wants to have some fun (and upon further thought, maybe not empty her own chamberpot). https://www.goodreads.com/book/show/123238138-lady-avery-and-the-false-butler?from_choice=false&from_home_module=falseAnd if you're looking for something similar:Miss Ava's Scandalous Secret by Sofi Laportehttps://www.goodreads.com/book/show/60756662-miss-ava-s-scandalous-secretLady Ludmilla's Accidental Letter by Sofi Laportehttps://www.goodreads.com/en/book/show/60391368The Bridgertons Series by Julia Quinnhttps://www.goodreads.com/series/40393-bridgertons

If you know you know. https://www.goodreads.com/en/book/show/181344829 

Real book, or an incredibly intricate catfishing attempt on Jordan? Well, regardless, it seemed to have worked. Jordan's pick this week is Lady Ludmilla's Accidental Letter by Sofia Laporte, and showcases just about every romance trope she loves, an honestly impressive feat.https://www.goodreads.com/en/book/show/60391368And if you're looking for something similar:The Bridgertons Series by Julia Quinnhttps://www.goodreads.com/series/40393-bridgertonsLove in the Afternoon by Lisa Kleypashttps://www.goodreads.com/book/show/7491418-love-in-the-afternoonDivine Rivals by Rebecca Rosshttps://www.goodreads.com/en/book/show/60784546

Gut-wrenching romance, sizzling chemistry, and weird scent glands...it's all here in part 2 of Bride by Ali Hazelwood.https://www.goodreads.com/en/book/show/181344829 

This week is a "continuation of the general behooving," otherwise known as "Katie went into some weird funk and ended up reading all seven books in this series and now wants you to read them all, too." The Emperor's Edge series by Lindsay Buroker may be a slow burn, but boy is it worth it!The Emperor's Edge Series by Lindsay Burokerhttps://www.goodreads.com/series/66385-the-emperor-s-edgeAnd remember, the first book is free on Amazon!https://a.co/d/9kQXfDa