My Brother, My Brother And Me

It's our second, super long MaxFunDrive special! We're celebrating by introducing our new Wrestlemania-themed podcast within a podcast, and by talking about which common household objects are dangerous for you to press your genitals into. Suggested talking points: Wrestlemania, Annoiding, Truckin', Conversational Currency, Sexting, Sleep Death Pods, Skyscared, Butter Doesn't Work

It's the first part of our two-part Max Fun Drive extravaganza! Reach into them pockets, and pull out whatever's in there, and then throw that away. We don't want your change, folks. We want sky-high stacks of crisp American bills. Suggested talking points: Chuckle Tax, Terra Nova, The Thickness, First Impression Beans, Secret Marriage, Dungeons and Death, Dropping LBs, Step By Step

Ssh. Oh, man. You guys are going to have to keep it down this week. We're feeling a little under the weather, which is to say, under the exorbitant number of St. Patrick's Day beverages we consumed. Let's just get through this one, okay? Suggested talking points: A Quiet Podcast With the Lights Off, Hunger Games: Abridged, Little Monsters Only, Playplace Wedding, Its'a Me Kevin, President Doritos

It's a week of highs and lows for the McElroy bros, ranging from tragic revelations about Golden Corral visits to how great it would be if famous Hollywood actors were actually Pokemon. Stuff it! Suggested talking points: The Sore Tooth, Bat Pelts, Pet Celebrities, The Game of Bones, Making it Dwayne, "Put Your Soap in My Soap," Continental Divide, OG Water

We know that you'd never be so bold as to ask us to talk about relevant events like college basketball championships -- so we went ahead and fulfilled that request for you. We know, it's like we share a single brain! Now, we're going to make you think about nachos. Suggested talking points: Hoop Bros, Stop Snitchin', Tieboner, Babydoctor, Lock up Your Kids, Coal-Fired Internet, Gallagher v. Gallagher, A Recap of Brett Favre's Career

We can't think of an episode that's as timely and relevant as the one you're about to listen to. Just in time for the Oscars, we're bringing you some truly sage-like movie talk. Sadly, that movie came out in 2004, and was the worst thing ever. Suggested talking points: P.O.D., Impossible Dave, President Lamppost, Getting Zucked, Squatching, Dickolletage, Without a Paddle

Happy Presidents Day, everyone! Join us as we reflect upon the executive successes of administrations past, present and future, and also as we talk about which Presidents are the cutest. Suggested talking points: Prez Fight, Pinterest, Fly Exam, Psychic Battlefield, Lady Dupe, Scoville Units, Tv Freebase, Dig Deep No Fear, Jeopardy Angels

We appear to have forgotten that it's Valentine's Week, because this particular episode doesn't include much actionable romantic advice. If only today were a holiday celebrating sword-based home security. Suggested talking points: The Death of Zydeco, Krill Out Ya' Gills, Handsomeness, Dirty Diamonds, Boxing Tips, Budz, Civil Swords, Panic Rooms

It's time for us genuine sportspeople to gather around and talk about the big game that we're legally prohibited from talking about! How did we skirt around these restrictive broadcasting regulations, you ask? Well, we spent most of our time talking about imaginary babies. Suggested talking points: Potatoes McGee, Pleasure Buddies, Potter v. Rodgers, Skilled Labor, Cracker Barrel, Baby Island, Moist, The Creek, Mini-Mini Imaginary Baby Golf

We're centering our chakras and aligning our voodoo power centers to bring you our most spiritual episode to date. Come, join us as we look not only into the problems of our dear listeners, but also, the maladies of the soul. Suggested talking points: Prisoner of Worship, Fridge, Third Wheel, Arch Duke Zach Morris, Dupree'd, Merksmanship, Bakulover

My Brother, My Brother and Me 88: The Lion, The Witch and the Boyskinz We're standing alongside our online brethren as we fight off the oppressive chokehold of internet-ruining federal legislation! If you don't find this week's episode amusing, it's because we blacked out all of the potential comedy. That'll teach you, Congress. Suggested talking points: SOPA, Fourthmeal, Oberstian Punishment, YUUUUP, Creeped Off, Buttsongs, Cake Boss

Yes, we took an impromptu vacation last week, for which we're eternally sorry. However, we come to you today as fully refreshed men, prepared to answer your queries and assail the internet-at-large with verbal and physical abuse. Come, beat up the internet with us. Suggested talking points: Footsmanship, Whipped, The Pebbles Voicemail, Goat Boyfriend, Twerk Squats, Mr. Paula Deen, Lettuce, Run-around, Full House Trivia, When to Hold 'Em, Pokeality

It's a new year, and a new you -- and man, we really hope that the new you likes goofs about wieners, because we have them in spades. We've also got a little bit of warm encouragement to help you complete your resolutions, couched comfortably within even more genital humor. Suggested talking points: Twenty-Dozen, Hairstyle Secrets, Taco Coordinator, Hipster Walrus, Along Came Polly Museum, Dickbats, Bathroom Brother, Feety Pajamas, Loveboss

It's our second annual Candlenights special, and you know that means! Actually, you might not, since it's only the second time we've done it. Oh, well, it means that we go the whole episode without dropping any profane language, so you can share it with your innocent, nubile ears. Also, you shouldn't say "nubile ears" in front of them, because that's kind of profane. Suggested talking points: Raspberry Pillow, The Long Con, Santa Baby, Trampires, 1 P.E., Christmas Conspiracy, Forever Lazy, Mistlesmooch, Measure Your Year in Gifts, The Briefness, Unwanted Twilight, Cat Buglary

It's the second part of our recent live show double header in Austin, Texas. Don't feel compelled to skip it if you already listened to the last one! It's got entirely different questions, and also, we get significantly more tore-up on three-dollar Walgreens booze.

We're live in Austin for the first part of our two-show comedy extravaganza. As it turns out, everything is bigger in Texas, and boy, does that include shame. Come, listen to our ill-conceived goofs and monkeyshines.

We're trying awfully hard to hitch our caboose of comedy to the engine of holiday cheer, but it's pretty difficult to do so when the world's events try to bring us down at every turn. Today, we mourn the falling of a political titan. Join us. Suggested talking points: Cain Train, Shorty, Aggro-Sexual Art, Bite the Rose David, Teeeeens, Instructions for Salvation, The Long Hoard, Gender-based movies, Podtraxx, MADDAFCS

Happy week of Thanksgiving, everyone! In this episode, we discuss the many, many things on this Earth we're grateful for, and offend the Pat Morita estate within the first 90 seconds or so. It's a holiday show the whole family can enjoy, assuming they are bad people. Suggested talking points: Sweet Potato Protocol, Five Years of Lovin', Sexy Kickball, Man vs. Sadness, Washing Off the Night, Risk/Reward, Before Twilight, Turbacon, On a Good Day

This week's episode is a little late, because Griffin spent all weekend in New Orleans. On the plus side, he speaks with a cajun accent the whole time! On the minus side: It is incredibly offensive to everyone. Suggested talking points: Creepin', Vitamin Caddy, Heartpool, Infected City, Arcade Fire of 1972, Dovahkiin, My Gushers, Yellowcard

This week, the McElroy brothers are celebrating their own birthdays. All three of them. They were all born on the same day, because their parents would never do something so cruel as to leave one of them out of shared birthday festivities. Suggested talking points: Birthdaze, Trivia Stragglers, Itchy Secrets, Lump Sums, Heart's Desire, Five Minutes of Seaman Humor, Purest Truesilver, Goof Ya to Sleep

It's our super special Halloween Spooktacular, and you know what that means: We quickly forget that it's Halloween, and start going off on tangents about high school boners and how cool Randy Jackson's eyewear is. Pretty spooky, right? Suggested talking points: Dogg Pound, Hearse, Ingratia, Clownfish, The Fight Club Heist, Engorged, Cat-calling, Moving Like Jagger, The King of Dead

Just one short week -- well, okay, one normal-sized week -- stands between us and Halloween. Are you ready, dear listeners? Have you assembled your costume? Planned your event calendar? Candied your corn? Don't worry if you've fallen behind; we've got some tips for the stragglers. Suggested talking points: Halloween Prep, Pay it Forward, Gossip Boy, Dracula: The Gun, Nailfreak, Family Ties, Prince's Business, The Giamatti Test, Facekissbook

We'd like to take some time in this episode to apologize for all the straight-up erroneous garbage we've spouted in our previous dispatches. Of course, our apologies aren't comprehensive -- that would take the full hour -- but we come as close as we can manage. Suggested talking points: Fill in the Gaga, Raspberry Fizzlespritz, Choddler Boyfriend, Genuine Bieber Fur, Toker Grace, Sad Libs Two, Manicurious, Skittlenips, Frank Lloyd Dirty Boi, Ghostly Doorknob

We were on a pretty tight timetable to get this particular episode out, so it may not be the feature-length epic you've been hoping for. Don't blame us, blame the terrorists. (Also, the gourds.) Suggested talking points: Party Pupa, Homeschooled, Jeans-Vault, Gundammit, Grandpa Cop, Firework, Crocoswine

Is your body prepared for the ravages of cold and flu season? Are you all stocked up on vitamins B, C, E and J? If not, you need to listen to this episode -- it has all the nutrients your body craves. Suggested talking points: Contagion, Ectoplasm, Pants Music, Sexy Cops, Bruceaphobia, Tech Wizard, No Phone, 12 Angry Feet

On this day 18 years ago, the world of broadcasting was changed forever by the debut of one of television's finest programs: Boy Meets World. Today, My Brother, My Brother and Me does its part to keep the fires of Cory, Topanga and Shawn alive and roaring. Suggested talking points: Plus Zero, Greed of the Magi, Jerkin' Abbey, Almost Perfect, Homeless Delights, Scrotoshop, Taste My Steel, SMG Smooch

This week's episode is all about fresh experiences, like Travis' new horrible segment, or the first Pumpkin Spice Latte after a year of not drinking Pumpkin Spice Lattes. Out with the old, in with the new! (Actually, we're keeping the old.) Suggested talking points: Pumpkin Spice Latte, Open the Briefcase, Stoneymoon, Extraordinary Accent, Sad Libs, Jerk-It Sheath, Bounce O' Clock, Get Busy Living Together

We come to a consensus pretty late in this week's episode that it is, against all odds, our yuckiest hour of programming to date. We suggest listening to it in a warm bath, so's all the yuckiness from our mouth-words washes off instantantly. Suggested talking points: Hug Your Hound, Zune of Love, BBFFE, Bonejockeys, Doctor Llama, Babypolice, Wyngz, Roommate Date, What a Love, The Road, Destineeeeeeeee, Superman

We hope you guys share our rampant fervor for Emmy season, because it's basically all we're talking about on this week's episode. Actually, we start out the episode talking about it for like two minutes, and then never return to it again, which is kind of par for the course. Suggested talking points: Nuclear Family, Lonely Dew, Recovery Sandwich, The Bounty Hunter, Expectorate, Cat in a Hat with a Hat, Ambiguous Boyfriend, A Lonely Year, Skinny Driving

We're coming to you live (see: pre-recorded) from the Pacific Northwest, talking about all the important issues that saturate the worry centers of your brain. Like, for instance, are we having a pleasant time in the Pacific Northwest? How is its temperate climate treating our sensibilities? What's up with the Puget Sound, you guys? Suggested talking points: Tossed Salad and Scrambled Eggs, An Olyphant's Faithful 100 Percent, Funnel Cloud Coitus, Skittles and Romance, Screaming Brain, Rubberbaby, The Taking Tree, 4th President, Legs and How to Use Them

We realize that today's going to be fairly rough on the more youthful portion of our audience, as they'll be forced to march back to the confines of their educational prisons for nine more brutal months. We feel you, friends -- and that's why this week's episode is geared to help you deal with your back-to-school anguish. Suggested talking points: Get Fit, Chess Team Cabal, The Dean's Couch, Cello Man, Dumb Things Justin Did in College, Figure 8, Kiss Flower, Seven Stars, Sexual Ed, Cursing Cursive

Look: You're here, we're here, let's just get this thing done. Just a quick and dirty episode, fired straight from the hip, like guns are sometimes fired. By cowboys. Really, really hasty and inaccurate cowboys. Suggested talking points: Gorto: The Enormous Man, Jackback and Vid Kid, Fleetwood Maxx, Horse's Heatguts, Couchsurfing, Belly Shirts, Sam Elliott's Moustache, Cinco de Lovemaking, Spanking Party

Unless this show ends up going on until the end of recorded time, this, our 66th episode, is likely to be our most satanic installment ever. We heard from this cool dude we met at our local incense store that if you play it backwards, you can hear all kinds of secret, totally psychedelic messages. Suggested talking points: Bad Investments, Dream Spelunking, Dorm Warden, Looking at a Picture of Tracy Chapman, Mark Twain's Latest, Mighty Max Hash, Cool Urinal, Love Lawyers, The New Lunchbox

Let's beat that summer heat together, friends, by staying out of the sun's angry rays, and staying in the cool comfort of our loving advice. Come on in, partner. We've got central air, and ice-cold Diet Pepsis. Suggested talking points: HTMLOL, Dracula's Quiznos, Best Friend's Girl, Sloppy Rhino, S&M Cult, Eleven Keyboards, Two Sunsets, Bustin'

We took a brief breather from our tightly-regimented schedule of collecting Archie backissues and stalking Jon Favreau around the San Diego Comic-Con showfloor to break you off a slice of wisdom. Come, throw on your Spike Spiegel costume, and let's get this party started. Suggested talking points: The Fattest Doctor Who, Chlamydia Day, He Who Shall Not Be Invited, Cooking, Space Camp, Quantum Leap 2, Creepin'

Do you guys remember the day the music died? We certainly do, because that day was last week, and also because we have super good memories. We're all up on that Ginkgo Biloba tip. suggested talking points: The Meaning of Creed, Dale Carnegie Jr., Skin Adjacent, References, E.E. Cummings Pie, Rumping, The Cat Talk, Sandwich 2.0

Instead of accepting and moving on from the fact that we missed last week's show to celebrate our freedom and heritage, we're just going to make-pretend that it's still last week. Which we're going to have to do every week until the end of time, we guess. We're not big on exit strategies, here. The Zookeeper Collapse, Virginity Bandz, Malldate, Carrot Top Canary, Earth Girls are Easy and Deeply Submerged, Yu-Gi-Oh-Yeah, Stankadank, Cake Boss: The Dog

There a lot of important, history-making events going on around this big, blue world of ours, and we'll be entirely damned if we're going to talk about any of them. No, instead we're talking about much more topical things, like if the Matrix is real. Suggested talking points: Steaker's Dozen, Slarshed and Dumpst', Not Like This, Electric Neil, Love and Dentistry, The Cap'n and The Gorilla, Hip-Hop Steamboat, President Haggar

We've wished our father a Happy Father's Day the only way we know how: By making him proud of the things we say in our audio podcast. We probably should have asked him whether discussions about Hitler's ghost are the kind of thing that made him proud. Suggested talking points: DickTwit, Hanging Out, Taco Bell Practicality, Hitler King vs. TMNChurchill, Dylan's BBGear, Tag It, Perfect Ponies, Pudcast, Pawnties, Grandpa Foot Fetish

More real. More talk. More live. We took to the stage at the Cincinnati Shakespeare Company -- which is in Cincinnati, you might have guessed -- to do our second live show ever. Come, share in the yuks! Also, the animosity.

Hey, you made it! We were getting worried. Some of the guys, they were like, "Oh, listener? They're not gonna show." And we were like, "No, man, you don't know listener like we know listener. They're good for it." Suggested talking points: Phat Beach Con 2011, Kel's Antics, High Art, Peterin' Out, Normin' Up, Twin Mayors of Birthday Town, Megatoots, Another First Kiss, Verne Troyer Awareness

Illness, fatigue and supernatural forces attempted to derail our regular recording schedule, but you know what? Ain't nothing gonna break-a our podcasting stride. Nobody gonna hold us down. Oh no! We've got to keep on advising. Suggested talking points: High Seas Tutelage, Shooty's, Seed and Sap, Paul Blart: Dark Knight, R.V. Double-Header, Higgs-Boson, Electro-Bryan, The Stupid 92, Sit and Spin, Restarting the Fire

After recording in the comfort, safety and familiarity of our daddy's house, we've returned once again to our respective Midwestern and Appalachian home bases. It's sort of like that song "Country Roads, Take Me Home," only ... um, in reverse. Suggested talking points: Kirk Cameron: Envoy to the Stars, GORP, Never Been Embraced, Candybeer, Crushed by a Yeti, Futureballs, Blanketarian, Where's Falcone

We did another episode together in the same room, sitting on the same couch. We're very, very sorry about the slight dip in sound quality, but we do not apologize for the weird, weird things we say due to our proximity. See you guys at Pasta Party 2012! Suggested talking points: Destination Wedding, Ally McBathroom, A Frame for Fame, The Gym Ruiner, French Science/British Crime, The Pussycat Discography, The Book of Robots, Sister Sister, The Shrek Ending, Violet Bonergard

Hope you guys like Thor. We're talking Thor. It's basically all we're about, now. Advice, and also Thor, and sometimes long-since-cancelled television crime dramas. But mostly, just the Thor, thanks. Suggested talking points: Loki Love, Willpower, Party Avoidance, PB Proboscis, Minigolf Kidnapping, Tantric Relief, C'mon and Graduate, Cold Case, Yabba-Dabba Divorced

This episode of My Brother, My Brother and Me comes to you courtesy of the Red, White, and Blue. Also, courtesy of the Millwall Football Company, people who are naked all the time and an irrational anger towards Science and God. Suggested talking points: Back-up Lover, Sex and Robotics, Potluck Contest, Nakedness, Food Babies, Soccer Wedding, Jim Charm, Mister Brad, Hug Safari

We warn you: This particular episode is so chock-full of handy Easter tips, you'll wish you could time travel back to yesterday or, rather, 364 days into the future, to a time where that kind of information would be even remotely relevant. Also, we briefly rap about Apollo Four-Forty. Suggested talking points: JC Chasez' Hang Glider of Success, Robodope, Weddingmania, Wolf Blitzer is Made of Light, King of Computertown, Dudekisses, Sexy Egg Hunt

It's MBMBaM's first live show ever -- and man, what a way to start our on-stage career! Not because we did a particularly good job, but because we very nearly talked about child pornography for a few minutes. We grabbed that bull right by the horns, and we stared at its eyes, and we said, "No, we probably shouldn't talk about child pornography. That's illegal." Thanks to Jordan, Jesse Go for setting up such a special, intimate night, Dan Telfer for his special, intimate hosting, and every single person who came out to Second City for the show! You guys are, as ever, the cat's 'jamas.

You guys have stuck with us through one year of monkeyshines, we've decided to reward you with a very, very special episode. What makes it so special, you ask? Its remarkable averageness. It took weeks of careful calculations, but we've managed to put together a real middle-of-the-roader, with levels of mere adequacy that you're likely not accustomed to. Suggested talking points: A Stein of Mayonnaise, Work It Day, Doppler Dating, Roy Halladay: Known Robot, Prodigy Balls, The Workout of Independence, Boice-Over Fartist, Soul in Your Bowl, Little 54

So, let's get this out of the way from the get-go: It's an odd episode. Justin's rapping on death's door, Travis is reading questions and Griffin is, as ever, high on peyote. We're not saying you should skip it, but ... well, let's temper those expectations, shall we? Suggested talking points: A cameo from Tom Waits, Art Installations and Angel Tests, Straight Cos', Danny/Joey/Ghost Alpaca, Full-Body Spanx, Khakis, Strategic Home Improvement Reserve