#266: Why You Feel Shame (Evolutionary Psychologist Explains) - Debra Lieberman
Move Your Mind with Nick Bracks · Nick Bracks
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Show Notes
Why do we feel shame? Why does guilt hit so deeply? And why do some people seem to carry these emotions far more intensely than others?
In this episode, I’m joined by Dr. Debra Lieberman — evolutionary psychologist, professor at the University of Miami, and Editor-in-Chief of Evolution and Human Behavior — to explore why humans evolved to feel shame and guilt, and what these emotions are actually trying to do.
We talk about the evolutionary purpose of shame, the difference between shame and guilt, why high-functioning people can be especially prone to self-criticism, how social media hijacks our need for social value, and why learning to value yourself changes everything.
This episode will help you change your life by changing how you deal with shame.
Dr. Debra Lieberman is an evolutionary psychologist whose research explores how evolution shaped the social mind, including emotions like shame, guilt, disgust, morality, kinship, sexuality, and cooperation.
Timestamps:
(00:00) Introduction
(00:23) Meet Dr Deborah Lieberman
(01:05) Evolutionary Software Of Emotions
(02:42) Social Value And Gratitude
(05:55) Why Shame Shows Up
(08:45) Shame Versus Anger Leverage
(10:35) Locus Of Control Trap
(15:02) Social Media Hijacks Validation
(19:50) Using Social Media With Boundaries
(22:51) Stoicism Purpose In Struggle
(26:43) Mentorship Missing In Modern Life
(29:33) Finding Your Foxhole Friends
(31:58) Toxic Friendships And Loss Aversion
(33:35) Tribe Size Dating Math
(34:45) Why Breakups Hurt
(37:03) Fear And Relationship Pressure
(38:46) Needy Mindset To Self Worth
(41:43) Building Self Value Skills
(43:42) Shame Versus Guilt
(45:57) Reimagining Human Education
(50:55) Critical Thinking In AI Age
(55:08) Do We Need Relationships
(59:57) Life Stages And Meaning
(01:01:02) Advice Happiness And Next Steps
(01:04:09) Resources And Final Wrap
Connect with Nick:
Instagram: https://instagram.com/nickbracks
Website: http://nickbracks.com
Email: [email protected]
Connect with Debra:
Website: www.deblieberman.com
Articles: https://scholar.google.com/citations?user=OhbXo2kAAAAJ&hl=en
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