Jupiter Saloon

Hey everyone! We wanted to shout out one of our favorite shows from a truly wonderful group of creative powerhouses: Civilized! (They won a Webby, which is more than we can say). You might recognize the voice of Sean Howard, who played the job-seeking, brood-feeding, moon dust-addicted party boi MELTROCULON in Chapter 1 of Jupiter Saloon. Please enjoy this episode, and show them some love by liking/following/reviewing/rating over here.   Episode 1: Rain Stranded on an unknown planet, Beatrix builds a shelter, while Bob does his best to help — and a new threat descends from above. Starring Kristi Boulton, Michael Divinski, Mbula Enobong and Sean Howard. Sound design: Eli McIlveen Cover art: David Demaret Announcers: Marisa King and Michael Howie Content warning: screaming, violence, death and body horror.   Transcript: https://civilizedpod.com/s1/101-rain/

Our theme song, “Satellite Girls” by Love Like Deloreans, is now available for vinyl purchase and free streaming! Jupiter Saloon would not exist without the support and brilliant music supervision of YouTooCanWoo, including major contributions from the Love Like Deloreans catalog. Visit https://ensemblerecords.lnk.to/LLD to check out all of your listening options. Great for: bounty hunting mixes, barbecue mixes, roller-disco mixes, falling in love on a random Wednesday night mixes, and morning meditation mixes. Visit www.jupitersaloon.com for more information on our other episodes, including cast information and transcripts.

Season 1 Finale. When Joe and Tau go to see intergalactic pop-sensation Phase Queen at the IO Pavilion, they leave the bar open to a duo of sinister visitors. Everyone sends letters. Thanks for the great season! CREDITS Directed by Thierry Denis Written by Chris O’Keeffe. Mix and sound design by Daniel Tureck Main theme song “Satellite Girls” by Love like Deloreans Music supervision by YouTooCanWoo. Check them out at www.Youtoocanwoo.com. CAST Tau Neutrino played by Beth Gallagher Hektor the Vector played by Mike Sears Flynn played by Robert Guerra Rover played by Rachel Beck Dilapida played by Jordan Cobb Dallas McLaughlin as AM1 Joe the Bartender played by Chris O’Keeffe Jennora Dodonna played by Jill Rogers-Jensen Matt Howell as The Courrier Kevin Carranza as Murray the Space Custodian GG Hawkins as Phase Queen featuring Angela Lee Belleville as the shuttle voice Our Executive Producers are: Thierry Denis Patrick Yurick Chris O’Keeffe Our Producers are: Luke Piedad Lea Wülferth T.H. Ponders Robert Guerra Recorded by T.H. Ponders, Olivia Henrikson,Thierry Denis and Chris O’Keeffe   Visit www.jupitersaloon.com for more information, including cast information and transcripts.

Joe the bartender installs a roto tom wall. Six Geoffs gets a date using an interplanetary, pan-dimensional dating app. Then Karaoke Night is crashed by the bloodthirsty Aqua Marines and their bellicose swarm (flock? gaggle?) of murderous warbots.   Visit www.jupitersaloon.com for more information, including cast and transcripts.

At Jupiter Saloon, it’s an unwritten rule that you can settle your tab with a good story. So, Hektor invokes lore law by telling the tale of “The Cowboys of Antares” — a legendary group of renegade rock choppers he used to fly with. Visit www.jupitersaloon.com for more information, including cast and transcripts.

Series Premier! Welcome to Jupiter Saloon, every space wanderer’s favorite galactic dive bar. Joe the bartender just wants a day off, but good help is hard to find. Flynn thirsts for adventure. And Tau Neutrino, bounty hunter-for-hire, wants a cover gig for her secret mission. Then the gang plays Frag, Frak or Frappe with a mysterious stranger. Visit www.jupitersaloon.com for more information, including cast and transcripts.

Jupiter Saloon is a sci-fi comedy podcast (audio drama) that takes place at a dive bar in space. Hang out with this gang of misfits as they try to make their way through the universe. Be prepared for murderous warbots, crazy karaoke, intergalactic pop star holograms and much, much, more. Episode Transcript   Narrator: In a world, hundreds of millions of miles from our own Computer Voice: Initiating landing sequence Narrator: where adventure is born Joe: Hey Flynn. What’s all the gear for? Flynn: Well, just getting ready for my next adventure with Captain Snakebait Narrator: where heroes are forged Tau: You see this? I don’t set for stun. Narrator: and villains are deadly Meltroculon: Feed the brood! Aaahhahahah! Narrator: Is a place where bravery comes in all sizes Rover: Whirrr Joe: Rover! Narrator: a place of mystery Murray: I am known my limitless names Narrator: A place where people….drink and recognize other people Tau: You know what he said to me one time? He said — oh fuuuuuck. Look who just walked in! Flynn: THAT’s the robot deathray guy? Narrator: A place made of music Computer Voice: Tomorrow night is Karaoke night. Reminder that because of recent events, this is not a BYO microphone event Narrator: where sincere friendships can be made Flynn: Hey squad! Tau. Not your squad! Tau: I want you to hold onto this. It’s my phone number, attached to a pocket nuclear device wired to trigger if I get too annoyed. Narrator: And Chivalry isn’t dead. Chuzz: Excuse, I’ve had two wet beers and wish to copulate. Will you copulate with me Vice Admiral Lucious Borrack: You bitch. Narrator: A place where chimpanzees are allowed to smoke inside Joe: No no no, not that door! Chimps: Screaming Tau: All due respect to the tale of the space monkey casino, but I believe Hektor was about to tell us what was going down with Bleu getting interrogated by that ILP jackbag Narrator: And there’s a guy made up of six individual guys, all name Geoff. Flynn: Hey Six Geoffs, what are you drinking? Six Geoffs: [six different simultaneous responses] Narrator: We don’t get it either Narrator: Jupiter saloon. The only bar in the galaxy where you can settle your tab with a good story. Computer Voice: Please prepare for our final approach. We are now landing at the Jupiter Saloon. Narrator: make your way to Jupiter Saloon. because we’re pretty sure you left your credit card there last night anyway. Bleu: Hektor, please give them a sense of how sorry we are Hektor: I see my reputation precedes me. I assure you, only the most lugubrious aspects of the gossip are true. Voice: Jupiter Saloon. Coming 2022 to an intergalactic truckstop dive bar near you.

Joe pours drinks, Flynn searches for purpose, and a mysterious young woman visits Jupiter Saloon. Later, we hear the tale of the Captain Snakebait and the infamous Sidewinder Mutiny! Visit us at jupitersaloon.com for more info! Episode Transcript Intro Voice Over (Jordan): Support for this project is provided by the Estate of Dr. Jewel Plummer Cobb, whose commitment to education, science, the arts and equality lives on through her memory. Please remember to support creativity wherever you can. [spaceship flying followed by the ambient noise of its engines] Voice Over (Spaceship AI): We are now in orbit around the stormy atmosphere of Jupiter. On your left you will see IO, Jupiter’s fourth-largest moon with shuttle service daily from the planet. Make sure to see a show at the Galileo IO Pavilion. On the right you will see the Olde Europa House – talk to your drive if you’d like to schedule a tour. Please prepare for our final approach. We are now landing at the Jupiter Saloon. [theme music – “Satellite Girls” by Love like Deloreans] [saloon chatter fills the room] Joe: Welcome to the Joop – Oh, hi Flynn. Flynn: What’s good, Joe? Joe: I dunno man. Got a weird feeling about tonight. Someone’s either gonna get killed or fall in love. Wanna bet on which? Flynn: Uh…no thanks. Man. Look, Joe, I just got back from this wild trip to Zoonon. It was crazy- Joe: Yeah, you save any princesses? Flynn: Not today, man, just a freight run. But that galaxy is full of cyber pirates. Joe: Oh hey, that reminds me, this bald monk guy in a gold cloak came in, looking for you. Flynn: Are you for real? Joe: Yeah, he said something about an amulet and your destiny, or something? Flynn: Wait, really? Joe: No. Uh what are ya drinking? Flynn: Ugh. I’ll talk a pint of MARS IPA and a Hip Shot. Joe: Hey, also, please make sure you settle your tab. It’s getting really high. Flynn: Oh, hey 6 Jeffs. 6-Jeffs (all six Jeffs speak at once): Good Morrow / Hi / Well hello there / Haaay / Sup Joe: Hey 6 Jeff, what’s it gonna be? 6 Jeffs: Scotch / Eh, Tito’s Vodka / Gaslight dude / Transporter / Martini Joe: You got it. Space Bass: Yo coming through, heavy stuff. Space Bass: Man, would ya’ll get ya’ll’s asses out of my way. I’m carrying all this stuff. Don’t ya’ll see me? Misc. Patrons: Oh, sorry / excuse me/ sorry. Joe: Thank you Space Bass. Flynn: Wow, karaoke tonight?? Joe: Yeah, you should stick around. I’m really looking forward to some of tonight’s …stellar performances. [glass breaks in the distance] Joe: Hey, Rover! Cleanup on table 15! (back to Flynn) How’s that blue gal from Neptune that you were hanging out with? Flynn: Ah man, I thought it was going really well but uh then, ya know, the other night, she tried to break my heart. For real, she tried to stick hand in my chest cavity and rip my heart out. It was real rough. Joe: Yep, that’s what they do. Flynn: I guess I’m back on the market. [overheard from afar, phasers chatting and approaching the bar] Phaser Quartzney: So like, I think Phase Queen took so much time between albums because she was getting work done …like, maybe a noses job. Phaser Yelly: (gasp) I love Teenage Andromeda. That song get me through my last supernova… Joe: (to himself) oh boy, here we go… Flynn: Hey Joe, are these girls here for like, karaoke or something? Joe: No, they are phasers. Flynn: Joe, what’s a phaser? Joe: You know Phase Queen? Flynn: Yeah, I know who Phase Queen is. Joe: Yeah, well, she’s playing a moon show up at the IO Pavilion tonight. And all of her fans are pregaming. Here. Buckle up, buddy. Flynn: Ugh. Phaser Quartzney: Woah, this bar is… eclectic. Phaser Yelly: Quartzney, how did you know about this place? Joe: Uh, what can I get you guys? Phaser Quartzney: Um, wait, (to Phaser Yelly) what are you having? Phaser Yelly: I was thinking a cosmic soda. I’m on BLACKHOLE30, so like, nothing processed for me because I really need to reset my gravitational pull. Phaser Quartzney: Oh, for sure. Uh hey, do you have sentient water? Joe. No. 6 Jeffs: Ladies (x6) Phaser Yelly: Umm… what are you? Flynn: (brightly) Oh, that’s 6 Jeffs – he’s made up of six guys named Jeff …yeah, I don’t understand it either. Phasers Quartzney: That’s weird. (to Joe) Um, do you take Interorbital express? Joe: We are crypto only. Phaser Yelly: Wow, Jupiter really is an emerging planet. Flynn: You know, you can pay in a good story, too! Joe: No …no, don’t. Phaser Quartzney: A what? Flynn: It’s a bar policy. Joe: Shut up Flynn. Phaser Yelly – Oh, oh, I know. Uh, tell him about Cindy’s bachelorette party. Phaser Quartzney: Oh, that one that turned into a pan dimensional rager? Phaser Yelly: Oh my gosh! Joe: You guys listen. You know it sounds like a wonderful story. Tonight is Karaoke night. No stories on Karaoke night. I can only accept Crypto. Phaser Yelly: Ugh. Where’s the bathrooms? Joe: All the way in the back. Blue door on the left. Do not go in the red door. The s

Welcome to Jupiter Saloon. Get excited for the pilot! by Chris O’Keeffe & Patrick Yurick Featuring Vocals by: Chris O’Keeffe Patrick Yurick Karyn Keene Robert Guerra Grace Hawkins Kevin Carranza Rachel Beck Mary Nichols Recorded by Jeff Litzman. Mixed and mastered by Dan Tureck. Music supervision by YouTooCanWoo out of Brooklyn, NY. Main theme: \”Satellite Girls\” by Love like Deloreans. Written by Derek Muro, Lorna Krier and Peter Pearson.