Eps 148: Solo Show - Teasing Apart the External Parenting Experience from the Internal Experience

Solo Show – woop woop! It is all me today people, and I am so excited to be sharing some powerful thoughts and experiences with you today.

• Wading through our experience to support out children
• The writing process
• Going deeper into what parents can uncover/discover for themselves
• We have an external experience of raising kids – everything that happens outside of us
• We also are having an internal experience – the ways that our physical body feels, sensations, also the emotional experience that we are having, what gets brought up by the external stimuli
• External and internal are both happening at the same time
• Based on what our experiences have been in life, our relationships in life, we have a lens that we see the world out of
• Sometimes the internal response “works” for us
• We have a well wired survival system – amygdala – but our survival system isn’t always what is needed in our daily life
• The pendulum swing of raising/living with teens – everything is great until it is not, parents are the anchor that witness/hold space and it’s hard to remember that the behavior is a pendulum swing. Connect /loving vs dysregulation/discouragement
• We (parents) go into “fix it” mode
• Alternative – recognizing what is happening physically in my body, seeing what is happening for me, what is the lens I am looking out of?
• Fear – tension in the body – belly/jaw
• When kids feel discouraged, they tend to want to share the feeling with others
• Looking below the surface - the iceberg metaphor
• Episode 129
• Episode 103
• Episode 110
• Today is a reminder that there is so much going on under the surface…. Curiosity as a guide AND it’s ok and important to recognize where you are at physically/emotionally and taking a pause to get yourself together

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