Jimmy Neutron Is A Sh!#head

Season 2 drops the nuclear option early. Madame Foster manipulates Bloo into a night of debauchery, in which Bloo gives Mac drugs and the gang drag-races across town. When the hangover passes, she takes everyone bowling. Then Lauren Faust escapes from her cage and mauls us with the worst episode we've seen yet. And Herriman's secret side hustle is revealed...

Thinking about it, this show still hasn't had a moral. Eduardo performs his twelve labors of owning a dog, but finds his hardest labor is speaking the Spanish language. Bloo goes from bullying small animals to kidnapping his friends, but faces their revenge as he is hunted like an animal while suffering a 24-hour-pneumonia. And Madame Foster releases the hounds...

Is torturing your characters for three episodes funny? This show dares to say yes, but the jury is out for everyone else. Bloo gains a stalker-killer as the rest of the house is too busy watching Hetero Hypnotoad, but he's too busy bullying his younger cousin and kidnapping mascots to care. Not even Wilt's good influence (and addiction to radio smut) is enough to redeem this carbo-loaded creature! And Terrance just eats a guy, no for real...

It is only the second episode, and the truly concerning stuff is out in full force! Herriman imposes dictatorial laws to torment Bloo, but gets his deserts when he suffers the worst fate of all: becoming an internet meme. Yet his macrame mandates are not the biggest obstacle for our leads, as Mac and Bloo find themselves trapped within the Escherian-Lovecraftian architecture of the house, never to escape. And Madame Foster reveals a devilish nature greater than our hosts could have imagined...

You thought they were dead, but imagine that, they're back! Connor and Agent Five break ground with Foster's Home for Imaginary Friends, and boy do we start on a low note! The denizens of the home try to get out as early as they can, terrorizing a local mall in the process. Yet the greater horror is found within the house's walls, behind a vault so well-guarded, it wasn't even locked. No matter where you hide, Blooregard Q Kazoo's sins shall corrupt you, and your shins will never be the same. And Coco makes a strong impression with her first of many Payday-style heists...

Our hosts step their toes into a series so malignant, they dare not give it more than one episode's thought. Dredging up some choice episodes from the world's most prolific buttocks-themed cartoon, they witness humanity's final whimper as a clerical error sends Adam Lyon to a nightmarish middle school full of semi-sapient zoo animals. Can the showrunners snatch boredom from the jaws of comedy, or will our heroes be torn apart like a cow-sized lump of cheese at Predator Training 101?

For Jimmy's grand finale, the showrunners make it explicit that he and Timmy are unambiguously evil and the shows' antagonists. Bored of tormenting their regular enemies, they create a supervillain capable of feeling physical and emotional pain to beat up. The background characters unionize to become one macro-Background Character, unified by their shared abuse. The universes collapse into a singularity point, and it is only by the grace of one particular angel that the hosts survive this one. And Hugh delivers his final line ever, "let's kick him while he's down"...

The results are in: Timmy's actually worse. Timmy causes an interdimensional incident because he is so repulsive that an entire dimension finds him unlovable. The boys both try to woo Cindy for their occult ritual dance, which she happily takes advantage of. Halfway through, the plot decides to begin, as Tim Curry heroically attempts to erase Retroville forever. And with Hugh MIA, Sheen becomes the most annoying fairy in existence...

Jimmy tosses us millions of years into the past, and we feel every second of it. Yolkus and friends, having nothing better to do, recreate the Junkman episode with even worse pacing than before. Sheen teaches some bad caricatures the true meaning of friendship, utilitarianism, then learns to fly I guess. Truth be told, the writers throw a lot at the wall for this finale, but absolutely nothing sticks. And Hugh attempts a scorched-earth maneuver against Retroville, just because he can...

Were it not for Sheen's counsel, I would have glassed your entire planet. The universe begins unraveling as the final stages of Jimmy's plan come to fruition. He discovers an infinite energy source on Mars, and will go to any ends to seize it for himself. Meanwhile, the writers decide it's time for us to finally hate Libby. And Hugh foils Jimmy's coup against Retroville by enjoying a nice cup of decaf mind-control...

We hate Carl. Jimmy assumes the role of Retroville's judge, jury and treasurer, and must wander the Test Field for his crimes. While he's away, Carl decides to fill the vacuum with his own brand of atrocity. In the background, Lovecraftian things are happening, but that's not the scary part. And Hugh's repressed hedonism comes out as he becomes a soulless monster (but what else is new)...

The central themes of this episode are planet-wide mind control, and Jimmy's insufferable crush on Betty Quinlan, and the latter is more horrific. Granny Badness attempts a coup on Retroville, only for Jimmy to assert his credentials to prove why he should be in charge. Later, Better Jimmy creates an alternate dimension to escape Worse Jimmy's vile influence, saving billions of lives. Oh yeah, and Houdini is there or something. And Hugh is made to watch as Carl muscles in on his perverted territory...

The search is over: we have found a good episode of Jimmy Neutron. Libby gets kidnapped by an shonen protagonist looking to master the ancient art of contorting oneself ghoulishly, and only Sheen and his incompetent dancing can save the day. Later, Jimmy's chihuahua complex leads him to snap, transforming the whole town into Stuart Littles. But when unexpected forces arrive, can Jimmy's greatest invention of slavery save the day? And Hugh exploits the situation to relish in his hideous fetishes once again...

The fact that this is not our first trigger warning for depictions of rape in Jimmy Neutron is the most upsetting parts. Carl gets a facehugger on the wrong end of his body, and the evil pro-choice Jimmy tries to stop him from dying. Meanwhile, Christian Slater's dignity is dragged through the mud again as he marries the show's T&A champion, who is secretly planning on killing him as reality falls apart. And Hugh legally disowns Jimmy in his lust for dead grandma money...

Pull up your diapies, you nasty freaks, this one's a doozy. Cindy's inability to act like a person gets her and Jimmy lost at see, and only heterosexuality can save them. Rather than growing as a person, Jimmy decides to make his grossest invention yet in an effort to save his home. And Hugh becomes an unwitting participant in a terrorist campaign which kills hundreds, because of course he did...

Connor and Agent Five are both seriously ill with bronchitis, and start hallucinating episodes that are better than the ones they actually watched. Jimmy is kidnapped and tormented by an old nemesis, but is never the wiser because he thinks this is just what academia is like. Later, he creates spray-on megalomania that transforms Libby into an evil dictator, as one does, and must shatter all records to undo his mistake. And Hugh kills Jimmy... wait, for real? He does it multiple times, too?!

It's time to do a pastiche of successful, well-regarded film series... but first, it's the Fantastic Four! Jimmy "accidentally" exposes his friends to lethal doses of ionizing radiation, and takes on the U.S. military with his findings! Later, a familiar foe shows up to positively dunk on the cast and do Retroville a much-needed service. And Hugh reverts to his primal form, played by Andy Serkis...

Somewhere in heaven, God is crying into his hands asking "Why? Why wouldn't they take a hint that I didn't want them to watch this?" Jimmy accidentally brings an alien parasite to Earth, and Carl immediately starts an infestation. A vague approximation of Gremlins happens, but the only thing scary are the attempts at comedy. And Hugh finds a horrific new outlet for his suppressed depravity...

The worst-case scenario has happened: we've encountered someone worse than Jimmy. A cracked-out rodent named Timmy Turner tries to rob Jimmy blind in his own lab, and causes an interdimensional incident that endangers all of Retroville... so basically, he's doing Jimmy's job for him. Meanwhile, a maniacal teacher tries to wipe out an entire race of supernatural beings, and we root for him. And Hugh's insatiable libido spells his own demise when a roleplay session goes sour...

Teams watching every episode of Jimmy Neutron lose their sanity 99.99% of the time. Jimmy responds to an alien phishing scam against everyone's warnings, and in doing so, signs up the Earth to be destroyed. He must best Tim Allen's gauntlet of unwatchable physical challenges if he is to ensure someone else's planet blows up, but will the promise of orc booty make him change his ways? And Hugh's obsession with alien smut turns out to be his best and only strength...