#InternetGrandpa

I have been completely consumed and overwhelmed at work since the beginning of January.But today, I’m finishing the last of three really consuming projects.It’s a reminder to me of three critical lessons that are really helpful to keep in mind when life gets challenging.First,“this too shall pass.” Everything eventually ends and at that point you can catch up on sleep, relax, and so on, but the memory of what kind of job you did will always be with you.Second, to live is to work, and if we can learn to find meaning in that we will be so much happier.Last of all, work will always be a challenge because they don’t pay you to do things that are fun and easy. You only get paid to do things that are unpleasant or challenging or require unique, skills. The trick is to make sure you are willing to accept the trade-offs cost and benefits.Sending you all my love,Your #InternetGrandpa This is a public episode. If you would like to discuss this with other subscribers or get access to bonus episodes, visit bradenbell.substack.com

I was asked twice recently to post some thoughts about relationships, both for those not in a relationship who would like to become in those who are in a relationship, but don’t feel it is working out.I don’t pretend to be an expert, but there are basic foundational understandings that used to be just woven into the culture.And, after 33 years of marriage, I have learned a few things myself, and been around others who have had long-term relationships as well. I’m going to do my best to share these principles that I believe have helped me and many others.I’ll probably do a whole bunch of these little snippets.I am struck by the fact that the fundamental mindset and skills and understandings that allow relationships to thrive used to be baked into culture in a way it no longer seems to be.So I think one of the first steps is being around people who have what you want and tuning out those who don’t have what you want.Also, it’s easy to look in the past and see where things weren’t good, and where there needed to be changes. But often these problems can be changed, improved, and tweaked: they don’t have to just be thrown out.Good relationships are such a big key to happiness and I want you to be happy! So much love,Your #InternetGrandpa This is a public episode. If you would like to discuss this with other subscribers or get access to bonus episodes, visit bradenbell.substack.com

If you really want to be empowered and happy, try replacing the words “I have to../“ with “I choose to..” or “ I’m investing in…”I often catch myself, saying, “I have to do such and such,” when there’s a task that I don’t really like or want to do.But the reality is that most of these things are actually just natural results of what I have already chosen to do.Often they are investments in something greater even if they are not common themselves things I like.So instead of saying, “I have to do this.” I tried to say “I have chosen to do this.” Or, “this is an investment that I’m making for some greater good.“This will help you feel empowered and self-actualized, and that will make you happy. And I do so want you to be happy!All my love, Your #InternetGrandpa This is a public episode. If you would like to discuss this with other subscribers or get access to bonus episodes, visit bradenbell.substack.com

Sometimes we have problems that are really big and are difficult and hard. But other times, the problems that seem huge may end up not being quite as big as we feared, and the solutions may be easier than we anticipated. It’s just good to remember that and hold out the possibility that maybe it won’t be quite as hard or difficult or bad as we think it is going to be. I had a mentor who always used to say, “Give things a chance to be okay.” Turns out, this is often true. And even when it’s not, worrying and stressing didn’t help do anything productive. All my love,Your #InternetGrandpaYour This is a public episode. If you would like to discuss this with other subscribers or get access to bonus episodes, visit bradenbell.substack.com

It’s pretty common for us to feel stuck sometimes. Nothing seems to work. Nothing seems to be going well and not only does it seem like it’s not going well it almost seems like things are working against us.Often when this happens to me it feels like this happens across the board in nearly every area of my life.But I have discovered something that works every single time. It’s almost miraculous. The thing I’ve learned is that once we take an action, however, small, of any kind it creates literal power in our lives.That creates momentum that helps us and either helps us to change our circumstances for seems to create the energy that makes things unfold and happen for us in good ways.One small action, a choice and then a little effort it’s all it authentic takes to start a powerful chain reaction.However, the effect is often disproportionate but so is the initial effort when we are stuck it really is hard to take even small steps, and so we have to push through inertia, but once I do that, I’m always glad in the result is always helpful, but sometimes miraculous.All my love,Your #InternetGrandpa This is a public episode. If you would like to discuss this with other subscribers or get access to bonus episodes, visit bradenbell.substack.com

Sometimes life seems to be an utter disaster. It may seem to be falling apart, or it may seem to be such a mess that there’s no room to fall apart because we haven’t gotten anywhere.Let me tell you why I think you don’t need to worry.When things don’t go well look and see if you have good bones so to speak.Are the fundamentals in place? If so, then you just need to be patient and keep going.If not, work on the fundamentals and get them in place and eventually, with time and practice, everything else will follow.All my love,YourYour #InternetGrandpa This is a public episode. If you would like to discuss this with other subscribers or get access to bonus episodes, visit bradenbell.substack.com

We can feel overwhelmed by our circumstances. Often, however, the things we experience may be the inevitable trade-offs and results of choices we’ve madeWhen we can see our ourselves as an actor—someone who makes choices and then understands the outcomes of those choices, good or bad, we empower ourselves to be better at coping with challenges. And, where necessary, we can see how to make different choices.While, none of us have complete control over our lives, seeing ourselves as agents and actors, who make choices and act, as opposed to objects who are acted upon, is a huge key to happiness.And I want you to be happy!All my love, Your #InternetGrandpa This is a public episode. If you would like to discuss this with other subscribers or get access to bonus episodes, visit bradenbell.substack.com

YOU are lovable! You are worthy of being loved! You are an incredible being of great light and beauty and, I promise you, YOU are loved!If you don’t feel that here’s something I learned from my own experience that will help. In the meantime I am sending you so much love! Sincerely. #InternetGrandpa This is a public episode. If you would like to discuss this with other subscribers or get access to bonus episodes, visit bradenbell.substack.com

We all want our lives to be smooth, perhaps having some occasional bumps along the way. The reality is that it’s generally going to be the opposite-but that doesn’t mean life is bad or that we need to be unahppy. We can lament and mourn and rage against that fact, or we can learn to deal with it. When the ocean's too choppy to swim we can learn to surf! The struggle is the way and this too shall pass. This will help you to be happy in life and I want you to be happy! So much love, #InternetGrandpa This is a public episode. If you would like to discuss this with other subscribers or get access to bonus episodes, visit bradenbell.substack.com

When we react and allow our interactions to be based on another person’s actions, we lose power over our lives. And, often, in doing this, we give power to the people who are the worst people to make decisions for us.You get to choose who you are in every interaction. So, set your boundaries — but set them from your aspirations and values, not your anger or frustrations. This is a huge key to being happy and self-actualized, and I want you to be happy! So much love, #YourInternetGrandpa This is a public episode. If you would like to discuss this with other subscribers or get access to bonus episodes, visit bradenbell.substack.com

A shout out to all of you super organized people, the ones who step up when no one else will, who take care of an important task, who understand why tasks are important, who read and follow the directions, who remember deadlines, and who work to follow the rules, those who are making sure that not only the trains run on time, but that even the small details are attended to, like making sure there’s dishwashing soap in the employees break room. I know it can be thankless at times. I just want you to know I appreciate you! I see you and I am grateful for you! All my love,Your Internet Grandpa#YourInternetGrandpa #affirmations #rulefollowers #TypeA #Positivity #encouragement This is a public episode. If you would like to discuss this with other subscribers or get access to bonus episodes, visit bradenbell.substack.com

In difficult, challenging times, it's important to stay connected and focused on those closest to us, those to whom we owe the most and the best of our efforts and energies. This is a public episode. If you would like to discuss this with other subscribers or get access to bonus episodes, visit bradenbell.substack.com

Anywhere we go, we are bound to have situations with people who annoy us. But these resentments, frustrations, annoyance, feuds, etc. build up into a huge drain on our current happiness, and our future accomplishment and joy. Letting go of these things is critical to happiness, peace, and becoming your very best self in every way. possible now, and in the future. And, I want you to be happy! So much love,#yourinternetgrandpa #grudges #resentment #lifeadvice #growth #internetgrandpa This is a public episode. If you would like to discuss this with other subscribers or get access to bonus episodes, visit bradenbell.substack.com

A really important key to happiness in life is learning to tune out voices and people who seem like they know it all, but really will not lead us to success in any given endeavor. In my experience, often the people who know the most are not the most glamorous or exciting. It’s easier to follow people who seem to have some secret insight or who look and sound the most appealing. But we often end up following voices who really haven’t achieved, or have even failed at, what we are trying to accomplish. So try to find guides who have actually done what you are hoping to achieve and listen and follow them closely. This is probably one of the biggest things I know that will help. You have a happy, productive life, and avoid things that will be bitterly disappointing. I want you to be happy! So much love, ##yourinternetgrandpa##fyp##internetgrandpa##lifeadvice##growth This is a public episode. If you would like to discuss this with other subscribers or get access to bonus episodes, visit bradenbell.substack.com

Here’s the single best thing I’ve learned that helps me get through work when things are hard for me: when it’s really challenging to focus, or when the day—or week—seems endless. As is so often the case, the most helpful approach is counterintuitive, and, while it is not complicated, it is not always easy to be consistent. But with time and practice, it becomes much easier. It’s an important part of being happy—and I want you to be happy!All my love,Your Internet Grandpa#YourInternetGrandpa #InternetGrandpa #Lifelessons #Lifeadvice #Positivity #Happiness #Growth #Work This is a public episode. If you would like to discuss this with other subscribers or get access to bonus episodes, visit bradenbell.substack.com

Life requires us to work. It can feel very daunting when you look ahead and realize how many years you will need to work. I had this conversation last night as one of my children was realizing he had a good 40 or 45 years of work ahead of him. I feel the same even though I have (hopefully) more like 15 or so years ahead of me. Work is a big part of life, so if you can learn to be happy working, then you will be happy in life. And I do so want you to be happy! All my love,Your Internet Grandpa​#YourInternetGrandpa #InternetGrandpa #Lifelessons #Lifeadvice #Positivity #Happiness #Growth This is a public episode. If you would like to discuss this with other subscribers or get access to bonus episodes, visit bradenbell.substack.com

Just wanted to send one of my patented, big-guy, encompassing hugs for whoever might need it. So much love,Your Internet Grandpa​​#YourInternetGrandpa #InternetGrandpa #Lifelessons #Lifeadvice #Positivity #Happiness #VirtualHugs This is a public episode. If you would like to discuss this with other subscribers or get access to bonus episodes, visit bradenbell.substack.com

You really are amazing. You are a radiant being of light; you are trying to do and be good, and even when you don’t hit that goal all the time, the effort alone makes a difference. Sending you so much love!Your Internet Grandpa​​#YourInternetGrandpa #InternetGrandpa #Lifelessons #Lifeadvice #Positivity #Happiness #Growth #Affirmations This is a public episode. If you would like to discuss this with other subscribers or get access to bonus episodes, visit bradenbell.substack.com

This year I’m recommitting to avoiding any stuff online--on any platform, in any form--that makes me angry, suspicious, or contemptuous. Anything that makes me feel superior and smug. Anything that tempts me to see another person as anything less than a full human being with all the dignity, nuance, and potential that implies and entitles us to. I’ve been working on this for a long time now, but I want to up my game even more. I have found that this is a really important key to being happy, and I do so want you to be happy! All my love,Your Internet Grandpa#YourInternetGrandpa #InternetGrandpa #Lifelessons #Lifeadvice #Positivity #Happiness #Growth #Peace #CivilDiscourse #HumanDignity This is a public episode. If you would like to discuss this with other subscribers or get access to bonus episodes, visit bradenbell.substack.com

It can be hard to reach out to others who might need us, because we might not think we have anything to offer. Or, we might not be sure what to do. But it’s still important to try. Here’s why, and here are a few ideas on how to start. This is a huge part of being happy, and I want you to be happy! So much love, #Yourinternetgrandpa #Internetgrandpa #lifeadvice #growth #advice #positivity #lifelessons #happiness This is a public episode. If you would like to discuss this with other subscribers or get access to bonus episodes, visit bradenbell.substack.com