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Horror Weekly

406 episodes — Page 2 of 9

I Know What You Did Last Summer, The Toxic Avenger, Santa Sangre, New Nightmare, and Seed of Chucky

We only have one new movie this week, but a handful of classic oldies to go along with it:* “I Know What You Did Last Summer” the new 2025 one, the reboot/requel/whatever.* “The Toxic Avenger” from 1984 in preparation for the new version that will be coming* “Santa Sangre” from 1989* “Wes Craven’s New Nightmare” from 1994, which completes our coverage of ALL the Freddy movies.* “Seed of Chucky” to continue that series, we only have “Curse” left to watch.And as usual, we’ve got a stack of shorts for you!* The latest issue of “Horror Monthly,” issue #48, is on sale now! Check out all the back issues, as well as our other books, with one easy link: https://horrormonthly.comMainstream Films:2025 I Know What You Did Last Summer* Directed by: Jennifer Kaytin Robinson* Written by: Sam Lansky, Jennifer Kayton Robinson, Leah McKendrick* Stars: Madelyn Cline, Chase Sui Wonders, Jonah Hauer-King* Run Time: 1 Hour, 51 Minutes* Trailer: Spoiler-Free Judgment ZoneOnce again, a group of young people cause a death, cover it up, and in delayed revenge a year later someone starts picking them off. It’s a long-after sequel, not a reboot. It takes place in the same town as the original movie, many years later, and some of the original cast join in the fun. It’s well done and entertaining, with Kevin liking it a bit more than Brian.Spoilery SynopsisAva arrives home and tries on a bunch of outfits; she’s going to Danica’s engagement party. Danica wants her to hook up with Milo tonight after the party. Teddy and Milo have the same conversation from afar. Everyone toasts Danica and Teddy, will Milo and Ava be next? That night, the fourth of July, the four all drive and look at Stevie, who didn’t go off to college like they all did. They invite her along to watch the fireworks.Teddy’s high and standing in the middle of the road, which causes an accident. The truck teeters on the edge of the cliff, and they all try to hold it teetering on the edge. They fail, and it goes over the edge far down into the waves below. The man inside the truck grabs Teddy’s jacket before falling. Teddy says he called the police, but now they all need to leave the scene. They all swear each other to secrecy.One year later, Ava has become a lesbian. She ends up taking Tyler back to her hometown, and she makes an impression on Milo. It’s time for Danica’s bridal shower, and everyone shows up. As she opens the gifts, she gets a note: “I Know What You Did Last Summer.” Danica has broken up with Teddy, so she thinks he sent the note. She’s with Wyatt now. “What if someone saw what happened?”They all go to visit Teddy, who’s a full-blown alcoholic now. He insists that he had nothing to do with the note. That night Danica takes a bath with headphones on. In the kitchen, someone harpoons Wyatt; it’s a fisherman in full cover rain gear with a hidden face, and a big hook. Danica finds him in a posed situation, and it’s clear that it was murder.Danica and Ava talk about the intervening year and how they’ve grown apart. The five from last year get together and discuss who knew what.Tyler has a murder podcast, so they think she might be involved– she even did a podcast about the events of the first movie, from 1997, right here in this town. Tyler tells Ava all about the Fisherman and the story we already know. Sure enough, the Fisherman shows up and menaces them both. Somehow, Ava winds up in a cage and Tyler’s podcasting days come to an end.Since the cops are on Tyler’s father’s payroll, they aren’t going to help, so the group decides to talk to Julie James, one of the survivors of the 1997 massacre. They talk about the connections between the two cases. The man who died last year is a bit mysterious, and they don’t really know who he was. She basically says that they need to find the killer before he kills them all.There’s a town hall meeting, and Ray, from the 1997 occurrence, shows up to warn everyone that this could all be connected. They go see him after the meeting; Stevie works for him at his bar. They track down the stolen car the dead man, Sam Cooper, was driving, and the truck belonged to Pastor Judah, the local preacher.At the cemetery, the Fisherman chases Danica all over the place after killing the caretaker. Teddy jumps in at the last moment and runs the killer off. Everyone sleeps together at Danica’s house that night. Ava likes it rough, which confuses Milo. He goes outside to think about that, and the Fisherman kills him before he goes back inside. Ava sees his car drive off and thinks he left.Elsewhere, Ray and Julie argue about old times and getting involved in all this.Ava and Danica go to see Pastor Judah. Ava talks to him while Danica searches his audience. The pastor and Sam Cooper, may have been closer than everyone was led to believe; they come to the conclusion that Judah is the killer. They take what they know to the sheriff, who promptly calls Grant, Teddy’s father and the town’s mayor.Teddy goes to the steam room and sees “You’re Next” w

Sep 7, 202532 min

Your Host, Pig Hill, 213 Bones, Borderline, and Abraham’s Boys

We've got a whole string of new releases this week. We’ll start out with “Your Host,” about a fun game show. Next, we’ll take a trip to “Pig Hill” and do some huffing and puffing. “213 Bones” slashes up a bunch of teens next, followed by the comedic-stalker film “Borderline.” Finally, we’ll see what came after Dracula with “Abraham’s Boys.”And as usual, we’ve got a stack of shorts for you!* The latest issue of “Horror Monthly,” issue #47, is on sale now! Check out all the back issues, as well as our other books, with one easy link: https://horrormonthly.comMainstream Films:2025 Your Host* Directed by: DW Medoff* Written by: Joey Miller* Stars: Jackie Earle Haley, Ella-Rae Smith, Jamie Flatters* Run Time: 1 Hour 29 Minutes* Trailer: Spoiler-Free Judgment ZoneYou will immediately think, “This reminds me of Saw,” but it leans into the game show aspect enough to be different and interesting. Jackie Earle Haley is excellent as the host and the rest of the cast does a nice job as well. The effects are realistic, and there’s a story that explains things nicely. It was better than we expected, and we liked it a lot.Spoilery SynopsisJake is announced as the “Final Winner” in what appears to be a very bloody, terrifying game. He ends up winning a shotgun blast. Credits roll.We cut to four young people who are visiting a summer house in the country. Matthew, Melissa, James, and Anita begin their weekend of partying– it’s Anita’s birthday. They all seem a little obnoxious, especially James, whose house they’re in. They hear a noise outside, and James finds a video camera filming their house.Anita doesn’t want to watch the tape; she’s a real stick-in-the-mud which causes a big argument. Anita tells Matthew that her mother’s dying, and she’s upset over that. They all go about their evening, and we see someone stalking around in the shadows. We watch as the shadowy figure injects each of them with a sedative.All four wake up chained to the wall in a dark place. There’s another video camera and a strange man in a red suit wearing a mask. He’s got a mannequin studio audience, as he introduces the four contestants for his “game show.” He promises, “There’s always a winner!”The Host says it’s time for “Rock Paper Scissors Shoot.” He shows them what that means to lose.Several hours later, the four commiserate about their predicament. He makes them admit the worst things they ever did. James was guilty of killing someone in a car accident. Anita made an adult web page to pay for her mother’s surgery. Matthew scams people online. Melissa admits that her animal shelter sold dogs to dogfighting organizers.Now it’s time for “Wheel of Pain.” Melissa loses an eye. Anita drills a hole in Matthew’s ear. In the next game, Melissa gets a splitting headache as the point of that one.The Host comes back in and shows them a video of him cutting a woman up with a chainsaw. He also shows Anita his own scarred face. James thinks the man looks familiar. Turns out, Anita used to work on the Barry Miller show; we get a flashback.Barry Miller ran “Wheel of Games,” a game show program. Anita watches as a criminal gets released on the TV news. Jake, the guy who died at the beginning of the movie, and Lisa, the woman who got chainsawed also worked there with Anita, and they plant the idea that Anita and others could get a lot of money if they accuse Barry of being a sexual predator. They lied and ruined Barry’s career plus he lost his wife and kid.Barry’s already killed Jake, Lisa, and the lawyer who ruined him. He makes Anita chew on the dead lawyer’s tongue.For the next game James and Matthew have fresh sewn incisions on their stomachs. Barry gives Anita the chance to play “Incision Decision.” She’s got a knife and guess where the keys are? Which of them is going to be cut open? They both beg and negotiate, but in the end, she cuts open James and pulls out a key.Her key doesn’t fit the door, so she needs the other key. Barry releases Matthew so he can fight back. He picks up the knife, kisses Anita, and then cuts his own throat.Anita gets the other key and lets herself into the back room of “The Show,” where she finds many videotapes and photos. Barry’s obviously been planning this for a long time.Barry invites her in for one last game. It’s time to pick her prize. Anita offers to publicly admit that she lied about her accusations. But he lost his money, his career, his family, all just for money to save her mother’s life, and nothing will get that back. Barry promises not to kill Anita’s mother if she just finishes the game.She cuts Barry and runs outside but is quickly recaptured. She smashes her face into a birthday cake, but there’s no trick there. He says she wins the game. There was no knife in the cake; the icing, however, is acid. She dies painfully.We watch more videotape, where the lawyer admits he raped all those women; Barry was totally innocent of everything before Anita ruined his life.Brian’s CommentaryThe trailers make it look like “

Aug 31, 202533 min

Row, Osiris, Raw, Hellraiser: Judgment, and Terror of Mechagodzilla

We’ve got some good stuff for you this time around! A mix of new and old this time, starting with “Row” and “Osiris” from 2025. Back in 2016, we met some cannibals in “Raw.” Lastly, we’ll watch “Hellraiser: Judgment” from 2016 and “Terror of Mechagodzilla” from way back in 1975.* The latest issue of “Horror Monthly,” issue #47, is on sale now! Check out all the back issues, as well as our other books, with one easy link: https://horrormonthly.comMainstream Films:2025 Row* Directed by: Matthew Lasasso* Written by: Matthew Lasasso, Nick Skaugen* Stars: Sophia Skelton, Bella Dayne, Akshay Khanna* Run Time: 1 Hour, 58 Minutes* Trailer: Spoiler-Free Judgment ZoneAn expedition on a pretty small four person rowboat is meant to set a world record going across the Atlantic Ocean. We get to cheat a little and see the ending of the expedition first, then we go back and gradually see what led up to that ending. In the claustrophobic setting, things get worse and worse as things go wrong and the quartet starts turning on each other. It’s very well crafted, tense, and fascinating. We both really liked it.Spoilery SynopsisWe open on a deserted-looking boat with bloodstains and wreckage everywhere. One woman is alive, clearly in shock, and there are two dead people on the deck. Credits roll.Megan wakes up in bed, delirious, with an older man and woman there. Apparently she and the boat washed up with her the only survivor.We cut to Newfoundland, Canada, as Daniel records his warnings and expectations about their upcoming expedition. Their four-person team plans to cross the Atlantic in a small boat, but they’re going to row all the way. Megan is going along, leaving her mother, who has terminal cancer.Megan arrives at The Valiant and meets Mike, a new guy. Daniel and Lexi are there as well, and the four start rowing. We cut back and forth between Megan in her recovery bed and the early stages of the row. The hospital man says he’s a policeman DCI MacKelly and she’s been there for two weeks; she’s suffering from malnutrition.On the boat, they’ve been preparing for this 28-day journey for the past two years. They’re off course, so Mike has to dive under the boat to see if something’s wrong. There’s a rubber hair band jammed in the rudder, and it’s burned out their steering motor. Daniel thinks it wasn’t an accident. The only one who was alone with the boat was Mike, but why would he do it? Mike was a replacement for Adam, who broke his leg at the last minute. Daniel insists they should push through and keep going.On board the boat, Mike gets sick, throws up, and then gets the shivering, hallucinating kind of fever. The boat barely survives a storm and a huge wave. Megan gets an incoming satellite call from Adam, who also recently broke up with Lexi; she’s the other woman on board. Mike deliriously threatens Daniel with a knife for hiding Rachel on the boat, which is obviously not true. Daniel whacks him over the head, knocking him out.DCI MacKelly, in the hospital, says there’s no record of anyone named Mike having anything to do with the expedition. In fact, a search by his first and last name doesn’t turn up anyone with that name existing at all.On the boat, in the morning, Mike recovers and feels fine, but everyone else is surprisingly quiet. We get a flashback and see that Megan was the other woman in the Adam-Lexi romance. We see that Daniel is trying to call his father to dig up more information about Mike.A wave hits and capsizes the boat; everyone goes in the water. Megan gets knocked out and nearly drowns, but everyone ends up OK except the boat’s battery, which is dead. Daniel thinks its because Mike didn’t latch the waterproof cover properly.Somehow, they’re also short on food, which shouldn’t be possible. They only have nine days of rations left, and Lexi blames Daniel for throwing it all out. He ends up admitting it, but that may be just out of rage and not something he actually did. Mike jokes that they could throw Daniel overboard and no one would ever know. Lexi seriously considers it, but Megan is appalled at the idea.The next day, all the water pouches are empty. That’s even worse than losing the food. Daniel again gets the blame, but he swears it had to be Mike. Mike and Lexi attack Daniel, tie him up, but Lexi bangs her head badly. She’s not dead but knocked out. Daniel says Mike killed his own girlfriend, Rachel, and is on the run from the police.Megan has Daniel and Mike row toward a shipping lane– at knifepoint. Day 28 arrives, and they lose out on the World Record. Daniel tells mostly-unconscious Lexi all his personal problems.Next thing we see, Lexi is dead. There’s another big wave, and Megan goes overboard again. When she gets back on, she considers cutting Daniel’s safety line loose and then just disconnects it. The current soon carries him away. She then helps Mike back on board.Out of water and food, Megan and Mike keep on rowing. Mike tells her what happened to Rachel, who simply went missing.

Aug 24, 202535 min

I Don’t Understand You, Kingdom of the Planet of the Apes, The Colossus of New York, Found, and Day of the Dead

Nothing brand new this time around. We’ll watch a couple from last year, “I Don’t Understand You” and “Kingdom of the Planet of the Apes” (2024). We’ll go way back for a thoughtful man-monster in “The Colossus of New York” (1958) and then do a serial killer film with “Found” (2012). Finally, we’ll wrap-up the original zombie trilogy with “Day of the Dead” (1985), which for some reason, we haven’t done before.And, as always, we’ll have five short films.* The latest issue of “Horror Monthly,” issue #47, is on sale now! Check out all the back issues, as well as our other books, with one easy link: https://horrormonthly.comMainstream Films:2024 I Don’t Understand You* Directed by: David Joseph Craig, Brian Crano* Written by: David Joseph Craig, Brian Crano* Stars: Nick Kroll, Andrew Rannells, Amanda Seyfried* Run Time: 1 Hour 37 Minutes* Trailer: Spoiler-Free Judgment ZoneThis is heavy on the comedy and light on the horror elements, with language barriers and misunderstandings leading to unfortunate outcomes. It’s not very scary, but it’s a lot of fun and we really enjoyed it.Spoilery SynopsisDom and Cole are a gay couple recording a video about adoption. It’s essentially a video application for the mother to choose them. It’s a lot harder than it sounds. After, they pack up and go on a vacation to Rome as credits roll.In Rome, the two go sightseeing. Dom is clearly obsessive, and Cole is well aware of it. They stop in to visit one of Dom’s father’s friends. They are given engraved knives as gifts - Cole’s is misspelled “Cool.” Cole doesn’t eat meat, which is weird in Rome. They talk about being scammed at one adoption attempt. The family friend, Daniele, has arranged a special dinner for them tomorrow night– and tells them to “Be careful.”The two arrive at their hotel in the country. The man at the hotel gets flustered when two men come in together and spreads their beds apart not realizing they are a couple. He soon realizes the error of his ways. Candace, the potential baby-donor, calls them on Facetime. She likes their video and has chosen them to be the fathers of her child. They’re overjoyed.They go to a farmhouse out in the countryside, an exclusive restaurant, where an old woman has promised to make them a special dinner. When the car gets stuck, it’s clear that this isn’t where they’re supposed to be. The truck who stops to help is the owner of the property, and he’s not happy. They ride along with the man, who stops to shoot a deer. He drops them off at… a place.They knock on the door, and a strange old woman answers. She invites them in. Turns out, this is where they were supposed to go in the first place. They have pizza and wine. When they kiss, she throws a fit about the wine being bad, and they misunderstand why she’s angry because she only speaks Italian. Cole’s a vegetarian, but it’s only polite that he try the horsemeat sausage pizza.The old woman goes into a long story about her son dying and her closing her restaurant. It’s been wonderful cooking for these two men, and she appreciates it. It’s all very nice, but they don’t have a clue what she’s saying. Dom reminds her of the dead son. Cole gets ill and has to puke, leaving Dom alone with the creepy woman. She offers him a clean, dry shirt.Cole finds an old man in an iron lung machine and gets freaked out. Suddenly, the lights go out, and the old woman runs to the breathing machine. In the dark, Cole accidentally pushes the old woman down the stairs, killing her. Dom tries CPR and hears bones snap.Someone drives up in a car. The man comes in and wants Dom’s car keys. He might be trying to tow the car. The power comes back on; should they call for help? The man comes back; he’s Massimo, and he’s rescued their car. He’s the old woman’s son, and he wonders where his mama is. He thanks them for cheering up his mother, who has been very depressed.They boys run outside to the car and run into Francesca. They have to go back inside, and Massimo wonders why Dom is wearing his dead brother’s shirt and he insists they stay for a drink. Massimo sees messages from Candace on Dom’s phone and smiles “You’re going to be dead!” although he’s just mispronouncing “Dad.” Cole runs inside and stabs Massimo in the neck, thinking it’s self defense. As he falls to the floor, he sees his dead mother under the table.Dom’s phone rings. It’s Candace, but they’re both covered in blood. They clean up fast. She’s going into labor, right now. Francesca stumbles in and sees Cole holding a knife over Massimo. She runs outside, and he chases her. Dom gets in the car and accidentally runs her over. “This has to be the last one,” Cole points out. At some point, Cole drops his bloody “Cool” engraved knife outside.Cole notices the big pizza oven in the kitchen. Could they use that to dispose of the bodies? Suddenly, the old woman sits up and Cole kills her again. They burn the bodies and clean up the blood. They get into their car and drive away. As they argue about seat belts,

Aug 17, 202541 min

28 Years Later, Flesh of the Unforgiven, Dangerous Animals, Spooks Run Wild, and War for the Planet of the Apes

This time around, we’ve got three new films, an ancient classic, and a not-so-old franchise film. We’ll start with the new “28 Years Later,” which just came to streaming. Next, we’ll watch the shark-slasher, “Dangerous Animals” and the weird “Flesh of the Unforgiven,” also from this year. We’ll then go back to 1941 and view the comedy-horror film, “Spooks Run Wild.” Lastly, we’ll cover the final film in the Caesar trilogy with “War for the Planet of the Apes” from 2017.And, as always, we’ll have five short films.* The latest issue of “Horror Monthly,” issue #47, is on sale now! Check out all the back issues, as well as our other books, with one easy link: https://horrormonthly.comMainstream Films:2025 28 Years Later* Directed by: Danny Boyle* Written by: Alex Garland* Stars: Jodie Comer, Aaron Taylor-Johnson, Ralph Fiennes* Run Time: 1 Hour, 55 Minutes* Trailer: Spoiler-Free Judgment ZoneThis has quite a different tone than the first two movies, and neither of us thought it was improved for the better. After 28 years, assuming the rest of the world is just fine, it seems like they would be handling things differently by this point. Brian thought it was on the dull side. Kevin wasn’t bored, but neither of us liked it that much.Spoilery SynopsisA group of children watch the Teletubbies as the air raid sirens go off and the parents all get really upset. As Jimmy and the others continue to watch, we hear the adults in the next room being eaten. The rage zombies soon get everyone in the house other than Jimmy. We’re told that the rage virus was beaten back from Europe, but it destroyed the entire UK, which was left as a kind of quarantine zone. That was 28 years ago… Credits roll.We open on young Spike and the other villagers getting ready for work on their farms and such on the island. His father is Jamie, who makes an amazing-looking breakfast. His mother, Isla, is sick, and she didn’t realize they were leaving the island this morning for Spike’s first time. She doesn’t want Spike to go, as he’s way too young. She’s confused or delirious, but she calms down easily.Spike and Jamie are going for Spike’s first hunt, and everyone in town cheers them on; it’s a big event. Spike’s only 12, and kids usually don’t go until 14, so he’s an exception. Jenny, the village leader, explains that if anything goes wrong, they’re on their own. They leave the island over the causeway that can only be used during low tide.The two hunters soon see a rotten-looking man crawling on all fours and eating worms. Spike makes his shot and kills the infected man; Jamie kills two more that sneak up on them. They find a house, and inside is a man tied up and hanging by his feet. Someone tied him up and left him for the infected. The man’s got “Jimmy” carved on his chest. Spike kills it.The two find a stag’s head stuck way up on a tree, and Jamie gets spooked. It’s time to go back home. Too late, they run into a whole horde of crazies– the fast variety. The chase is on! They soon run out of arrows and hide in the attic of an old house.We cut back to the village, where people hang up “Welcome home Spike” banners. We hear from Jamie about “Alphas” which are bigger, stronger, and smarter than the usual zombies. Night falls, and they can’t go home. They make a run for it and make it to the causeway, which is just slightly underwater. The Alpha chases them across the water, but the sentries at the village shoot it. They go inside to the celebrations where Jamie’s got a girlfriend on the side, Rosie.Spike talks to an old man, Sam, about the fire they saw in the woods; he says it’s Dr. Kelson, who’s been living out there for years. He’s… odd, but Sam doesn’t want to talk about him. Spike wants to get the doctor to help his mother. Spike eventually gets Jamie to tell the story about Dr. Kelson burning the bodies of the infected.Spike and his mentally-ill mother sneak out of the village; he wants to take her to the doctor– across the wilderness of the mainland. They spend the night in an old church. Someone prevents a zombie from killing them during the night– could it have been Isla, Spike’s mother?We cut to a group of Swedish soldiers who are being chased by a pack of infected. They run into an Alpha, who rips one soldier’s head clean off.Spike and Isla get chased by zombies, and they hide in an old gas station. They’re rescued by the sole surviving soldier, Erik. He’s stuck here now; once anyone sets foot on the mainland, they are quarantined– permanently.Isla comes upon an infected woman who is pregnant, and it looks very painful. The baby seems normal enough, and Isla wants to take it. Meanwhile, an Alpha tears Erik’s head off. The Alpha chases Spike and Isla right into the hands of Dr. Kelson. Kelson sedates the big Alpha, whom he’s named Samson. Spike explains why they’ve come, and Kelson invites them to his compound.Kelson has made a whole forest out of human bones, including a skull tower, as a memorial and tribute to the dead. Kelson shows

Aug 10, 202544 min

The Sound, Anarchy Parlor, Wolf Girl, Bats, and Shadow of Chinatown

It’s an odd week, and an even odder mix of films this time. We’ll start off with “Bats” a nature-gone-wild story from 1999, then travel back in time to watch Bela Lugosi ruin Chinatown in 1936. We’ll then take a freaky gander at a very unusual “Wolf Girl” (2001). “The Sound” is up next, a 2025 film about mountain climbers, followed by 2015’s “Anarchy Parlor,” a terrible tattoo tale.And, as always, we’ll have five short films.* The latest issue of “Horror Monthly,” issue #47, goes on sale in just a few days! Check out all the back issues, as well as our other books, with one easy link: https://horrormonthly.comMainstream Films:1999 Bats* Directed by: Louis Morneau* Written by: John Logan* Stars: Lou Diamond Phillips, Dina Meyer, Bob Gunton* Run Time: 1 Hour, 31 Minutes* Trailer: Spoiler-Free Judgment ZoneThe poster is cool. The science is bad. The movie is pretty good. It’s a genetically-engineered-creature-gone-wrong kind of movie with a big body count. There’s not a lot new here, but it’s got some entertainment value.Spoilery SynopsisWe open in Gallup, Texas as Quint and Emma, a young couple, drive out to an isolated make-out spot. Quint notices something strange outside the car and investigates. As a train passes by behind them, a giant bat breaks in through the windshield and kills them both. Credits roll.We cut to Skull Valley, Arizona. Jimmy talks to Dr. Sheila Casper, who’s crawling around in a tight bat-filled cave herself. They’re rudely interrupted by a helicopter containing Dr. Tobe Hodge and Dr. Alexander McCabe. They are needed for a bat-related “biological emergency.”The group soon arrives in Texas, where they are met by Sheriff Emmett Kimsey. The three scientists do an autopsy on the young couples’ bodies. They were, in fact, killed by bats, but that’s not normal. There have been some animal deaths, but bats don’t do that. McCabe mentions that these bats are special– two bats escaped from a lab. They need to kill the two bats before they can contaminate others with their unique viruses.Another body is found, and it was done by way more than two bats. The mayor wants to avoid a panic and insists they all keep it quiet. McCabe explains that the bats are more intelligent and aggressive, and now they’re omnivorous. If these bats infect the general population during a migration, that would be… bad. Dr. Casper says they need to kill all the contaminated bats before this gets any worse.Casper and Sheriff Kimsey talk about her love for bats. Suddenly, a swarm of CGI bats chases them, and they barely manage to hide in the car. They crawl all over the car, trying to get in; it’s very tense. When Jimmy and the deputy arrive, they get swarmed as well, but then the bats all fly away. All but one, which they put in a cage. They spot McCabe’s original two bats, but they escape as well. They inject the captured bat with a tracker and release it– but then the two leader bats tear it apart.Dr. Hodge gets the CDC to evacuate the town, and the swarm is slowly migrating in that direction. We cut to the town, where we see people doing normal things. The bats start killing the townspeople, and everyone else comes outside to watch. Among many others, the deputy gets eaten and there are many explosions. Dr. Hodge gets eaten as Casper watches, and then the bats all just fly away.In the morning, the army arrives as the surviving townspeople are evacuated. The army wants to blow up all the mountains and the town itself, but the Sheriff, Casper, Jimmy, and McCabe want to keep looking for the leader bats and save the town. The sheriff plays opera music as the others move into the town’s school.Casper wants to crawl into the bat cave and set up equipment that’ll freeze all the bats to death. McCabe overhears the plan and starts getting a sketchy look; he’s gonna do something dumb.The army locates the bats, who are hiding inside a huge mine. The bats attack and kill most of the army men. McCabe admits that he designed the bats to be “perfect killing machines” and he’s called them to where the characters are set up. “You let them out of the lab, didn’t you?” Casper accuses. Yep– he’s a mad scientist.Everyone runs around doing things as the bats attack the school. McCabe runs outside, and his two “babies” tear him apart and then leave. “I guess they got what they came for.”The sheriff, Casper, and Jimmy show up at the mine in the morning, and everyone’s dead. The soldiers got the whole mine wired with explosives and the refrigeration equipment, and the main characters just have to get it all working before the military bombs the whole place.Casper and the sheriff go down into the mines wearing armored breathing suits. They soon fall into a waist-high pool of bat crap. Then they find millions of bats in their lair. They figure out how to turn on the cooling system, but then the leader bats wake up and get all menacing. After a crazy battle, they kill one of the leaders and run for the way out of the caves.Jimmy blows up the cav

Aug 3, 202544 min

M3GAN 2.0, Tigers Are Not Afraid, The Love Witch, Dawn of the Planet of the Apes, and I’ll Always Know What You Did Last Summer

We’ve got a fun mix this week. We’ll start off with the more-sci-fi-than-horror “Megan 2.0” which just hit streaming. Then we’ll watch the depressing “Tigers Are Not Afraid” from 2017 and the less-depressing “The Love Witch” from 2016. We’ll continue aping around with “Dawn of the Planet of the Apes” (2014) and finally get caught up with the series with “I’ll Always Know What You Did Last Summer” (2006).And, as always, we’ll have five short films.* The latest issue of “Horror Monthly,” issue #46 is now on sale! Check out all the back issues, as well as our other books, with one easy link: https://horrormonthly.comMainstream Films:2025 M3GAN 2.0* Directed by: Gerard Johnstone* Written by: Gerard Johnstone, Akela Cooper, James Wan* Stars: Allison Williams, Violet McGraw, Amie Donald* Run Time: 2 Hours* Trailer: Spoiler-Free Judgment ZoneIMDB still calls this horror. Maybe just barely, but not like the first one was. This one is more science fiction action with quite a bit of satire and humor. It’s fun entertainment, but beware it has quite a different tone than the first movie.Spoilery SynopsisSomewhere near the Turkish-Iranian border, the bad guys grab a tourist and kill her. We cut to a security briefing about a new weapon. They have a new asset. We cut to Amelia, that dead tourist, who isn’t dead. She breaks her chains, and we see she’s a robot. She sneaks through the bad guys’ camp and quietly kills… everyone. Then she shoots the man she was sent there to capture alive. She steals some weapons and reports that she isn’t following orders any more.We cut to young Cady, from the first film, who is still in therapy. She tells us about Gemma, the inventor of Megan, who is now a vehement anti-tech speaker. Cady’s taken the time from being away from her phone to learn martial arts.Tess and Cole, Gemma’s employees, put on a disastrous demo of a new not-robotic exoskeleton. Turns out, the system has been hacked. Alton Appleton, a rich jerk, comes into the workshop to gloat. He’s designed a neural chip and wants them to use his brain implants to go into Gemma’s exoskeleton. He’s wearing one of those implants himself. “If you put AI inside a human brain, it’s not gonna ride shotgun,” she warns.That night, Gemma gets a very strange warning from her TV, telling her she’s in danger. It’s Megan, somehow, warning her about a home invasion that’s in progress. The smart-home appliances work together to defeat the intruders. Turns out, they’re the FBI (They could have knocked).Agent Sattler tells her about the failed experiment, Amelia. Amelia is a robot very similar to Megan. Agent Sattler points out how lucky Gemma has been with her book sales, business, and choice of home. He explains that Amelia has been killing everyone who had any kind of involvement with her creation, and that probably includes Gemma.Megan shows up on TV and explains to Gemma that she’s not Amelia, someone hacked Gemma’s computer and built another one. She’s just a program, and she wants a new body– in return, she’ll kill Amelia.Gemma puts Megan in a toy robot’s body. Megan points out that Amelia’s battery has a kill switch, but only greedy Alton knows how that works. Gemma goes to Alton’s party to get the information out of him. We see that Amelia’s there as well. Alton, in a wheelchair earlier, gets on stage and dances– his neural chip really works. He spots Amelia in the crowd and starts flirting.Gemma finds Cole at the party, and he now works for Alton. She steals his ID card and they go into the computer room. They plug in Megan, who hacks Amelia and steals a file from her mind. Then Megan finds that Amelia is here in the same building. Amelia steals Alton’s retinal print and hacks his system. Then she pulls out his implant. Amelia now has access to half the cloud servers in the country.Amelia knows Gemma is there, and Gemma has no choice but to let Megan into the system. They escape and assume that Amelia will be going to get Cady next. Turns out, the house they’re living in is just full of surprises. It’s Megan’s lair… somehow. Megan is there physically as well, but she’s a burned up mess. Megan and Cady talk about morality, life, and evolution. Cady wants to give her robot a “second chance.”Tess and Cady want to help Megan to beat Amelia, but Genna’s not so sure, at least until they see Megan’s factory in the next room. The group gets to work on making Megan a new body. She wants to be taller now, but insists on having the same face.Fully rebuilt, Megan explains that she’s not the first killer robot. The first killer robot has been kept for decades against its will, getting smarter and smarter. Amelia wants to find it and release it, a kind of AI god. They think Amelia will be going after Christian, another outspoken AI genius, who’s going to be at a big AI conference. Megan sneaks in to infiltrate the place as a cosplayer and does a fun dance for the crowd.Meanwhile, Amelia attacks Christian and the Chinese ambassador. Sattler grabs Gemma an

Jul 27, 202525 min

Sweatshop, Black Sheep, Nobody Gets Out Alive, Rise of the Planet of the Apes, and I Still Know What You Did Last Summer

We’re gonna forego the new movies this week and focus on some older titles. Kevin picked up three more dollar-store DVDs that we’ll let you know about: “Sweatshop” (2009), “Nobody Gets Out Alive” (2012), and “Black Sheep” (2006). We’ll also take another step ahead in two franchises, “I Still Know What You Did Last Summer” (1998) and “Rise of the Planet of the Apes” (2011), the first in the newer reboot series.* The latest issue of “Horror Monthly,” issue #46 is now on sale! Check out all the back issues, as well as our other books, with one easy link: https://horrormonthly.comMainstream Films:2009 Sweatshop* Directed by: Stacy Davidson* Written by: Stacy Davidson, Ted Geoghegan* Stars: Ashley Kay, Melanie Donihoo, Peyton Wetzel* Run Time: 1 Hour, 30 Minutes* Trailer: Spoiler-Free Judgment ZoneThis movie is like a showcase for the work of the gore effects people involved - the deaths are especially wet and effective in this one. The rest of the movie isn’t so noteworthy. We didn’t get attached to any of the characters, the script is draggy, and the acting is hit and miss. If you’re looking for top notch gore you’ll find it here but not a lot else.Spoilery SynopsisA woman wakes up naked and shivering in a dungeon. She runs around looking for escape. Outside, a cop opens the door to the big factory and comes inside, looking for intruders. It’s obviously the same building. We see that he’s not alone; someone is in there with him has a bloody mouth and isn’t quite human. The woman runs up to him, and he shoots her by mistake about a thousand times. Credits roll.Six hours later, a group of young people enter the same building. They’ve brought a disco ball and sound system to have a party here. They find a video camera left behind by Ghost, one of their group who was here before them, and they all watch a girl do a striptease on the camera.We get to know Scotty, Charlie, and some of the other characters as they wander around the place and argue. As they get set up for their party, we see someone else moving around in the dark shadows of the warehouse. Wade, Scotty’s brother, shows up, and he’s got the lighting equipment and beer. Kim sees a scary face in the darkness and causes a scene. They’re expecting a lot of kids in about an hour.Wade likes Lolli but is told she’s a lesbian. He soon finds out she is more flexible than that. Miko laughs at Jade, who kinda likes Wade as well. Then they talk about the rules for b******s. When Jade sees Wade and Lolli going at it, she runs off and cries. Almost immediately after, some ghouls come out of nowhere and tear Lolli’s guts out.Kim goes looking for Lolli and gets captured by the baddies. A big man in a welding mask cuts off her fingers with garden shears. He then breaks her in half with his huge anvil-hammer.Jade spikes Wade’s drink with something nasty, but Kenny punches him before he gets a chance to drink it. We get a dance break with Miko Scotty and Jade and Kenny get close. When Kenny loses his head, Jade gets a shock from the ghouls. She runs away, straight into the arms of the welding-masked man with the anvil-hammer. Gallagher would be pleased with the results.Charlie and Enix talk about how badly she’s run this whole operation. She might be doing something shady with the admissions fee. They suddenly notice how few of their friends are still working. Scotty and Miko have a drinking contest, and Miko gets the “bad bottle.” She vomits up blood everywhere, but then the Hammer-Man shows up to finish her off.Wade finds what’s left of Kim, but he’s too drunk to see how broken she is. Hammer Man gets him before he goes too far with her.Charlie and Enix find Ghost’s car, along with some of his body parts. They figure out that he was killed before they even arrived, but then they find Kim and the ghouls. Enix soon gets the point as Hammer Man comes after Charlie.Charlie ends up in a room with Scotty and Wade, who aren’t quite dead yet after all. The two brothers confess their sins to each other hilariously before they die. Charlie gets loose, runs back to her car, takes a gun, and shoots Hammer Man several times.Charlie runs into the main room, which is now somehow full of dancers. Hammer Man follows her and starts killing the dancers, creating a stampede for the exits.Only Charlie makes it out alive.Brian’s CommentaryThe characters are all distinctive, but not particularly interesting or well acted. None, not one, of the characters are even remotely likeable, so when they die, we’re like… “OK?” The kills are well done, and the practical gore effects are really good.Why are there ghoul-women and the hammer-man in the warehouse in the first place? We get no explanation or reason for this. That Anvil-on-a-stick is a great-looking weapon, although it wouldn’t be very practical in reality. Where did all those dancers come from at the end when the ticket-takers were all killed? Who was running the lights and the sound?It's a low-budget schlock that doesn’t get good until the

Jul 20, 202536 min

Bring Her Back, Hotspring Shark Attack, Border, Cure, and The Ape Man

We’ve got another week of five-and-five, with five features and five shorts, and they’re all good this time around. We’ll open up with the acclaimed “Bring Her Back” which just hit streaming, and the brand-new “Hotspring Shark Attack” which just released as well. We’ll watch a couple of older films, “Border” (2018) and “Cure” (2017), and then go way back to watch Bela Lugosi monkey around in “The Ape Man” from 1943.* The latest issue of “Horror Monthly,” issue #46 is now on sale! Check out all the back issues, as well as our other books, with one easy link: https://horrormonthly.comMainstream Films:2025 Bring Her Back* Directed by: Danny Philippou, Michael Philippou* Written by: Danny Philippou, Bill Hinzman* Stars: Billy Barratt, Sally Hawkins, Mischa Heywood* Run Time: 1 Hour, 44 Minutes* Trailer: Spoiler-Free Judgment ZoneAfter a disturbing opening, this takes a while to get to the horror, building nicely as things get stranger and more unsettling. It takes some time to figure out what’s really going on. The casting is spot on, the direction and effects are excellent. It’s a strange one, and we liked it.Spoilery SynopsisWe watch some people doing strange things for the camera, which sees things that we do not. Credits roll.We cut to Piper and Andy, step siblings, and she’s got weird eyes. She tries to make friends with some girls at the bus stop, but they make fun of her face. She’s mostly blind. The two go home to find their father dead in the shower. He’d just finished chemo, and something went wrong.The two get split up for foster care. Piper is going with Laura, but Laura’s had problems with troubled kids in the past, so she doesn’t want Andy. They beg to stay together, so they’ll allow it on a trial basis. He’s very protective of his younger sister.They arrive at Laura’s house, and she’s very friendly and nice, although it’s clear that she’s more interested in Piper than Andy. Laura had a blind daughter, but she’s dead now. They go outside and meet a very strange little boy, Ollie, who’s mute and has a birthmark on his face. He’s another of the foster children. Andy and Laura get off on the wrong footing right away.Later that night, Laura watches videos of the cult that we saw in the pre credit sequence.We also see that Andy has been traumatized by finding his dead father. The next day, they go to their father’s funeral. Laura cuts off a bit of the dead man’s hair and puts it in her pocket. After the funeral, they all play a drinking game. They all, even young Piper, get incredibly drunk.Meanwhile, at home, Ollie breaks out of the house and walks around the yard all bloody, trying to get into a locked shed. He watches the others partying from outside the house. Andy talks about the way his father used to abuse him when he was little, but he never touched Piper. Late that night, Laura pours her own pee all over Andy while he sleeps to make him think he did it himself.Ollie sits in his room and eats bugs. Andy washes himself outside because he’s afraid of the shower. At breakfast, Ollie tries to eat a huge knife, cutting his mouth up, and Andy tries to take him to the hospital. Once they get outside, they cross the white circle on the ground, and Ollie goes into convulsions. “Help me!” he says, speaking for the first time.Laura returns and is surprised that Ollie can talk now. She drags him back inside the circle and indoors, and there’s no more talking from him. We watch one of the old cultists videos. This has happened before, and it’s not pretty. Laura feeds the hair from Andy’s father to Ollie. We see from above that the house and much of the yard is surrounded by a big white circle.Andy has a terrifying vision of his father, who tells him, “She’ll die in the rain.” Andy slips and knocks himself out, waking up at the hospital, in the rain. He tells Laura about this, and she says she killed their father. Then again, he’s got a concussion, so maybe he imagined that.Laura dresses Piper up in dead-Cathy’s clothes and does her hair to look like her dead daughter. Laura wants Piper to stay when Andy turns 18, but Piper plans to go away with Andy when he leaves. We see that Laura still has Cathy’s dead body in her freezer.Andy gets released from the hospital, and Laura’s not happy about it; could he be dangerous? On the old videotape, we see that there’s cannibalism and soul-transference going on. Laura hits Piper in her sleep and frames it so it looks like Andy did it. Laura’s got a whole story made up to turn Piper against Andy. It all gets very confrontational, and Piper ends up taking Laura’s side.Andy goes to see Wendy, the social worker who placed them with Laura. He sees a “Missing Child” poster with Ollie’s face on it. When he sees Wendy, he’s very intense, and she won’t put up with him. Eventually, Andy talks Wendy into going to the house for a visit.At home, Ollie destroys the kitchen and attacks Laura, taking a big bite out of her. He then takes a bite out of the wooden counter-top, losing mos

Jul 13, 202536 min

Final Destination Bloodlines, Green Room, A Girl Walks Home Alone at Night, I Know What You Did Last Summer, and Godzilla vs. Mechagodzilla

It’s the week of “Movies with Long Names.” OK, maybe that’s just a coincidence. Only one new film this week, the latest in the Final Destination franchise. After that, we’ll look at the brutal “Green Room” from 2015 and “A Girl Walks Home Alone At Night” from 2014. For our oldies, we’ll start with the first installment of “I Know What You Did Last Summer” from 1997 and the even-older “Godzilla vs. Mechagodzilla” from 1974.* “The Horror Guys Guide to the Horror Films of Christopher Lee” is available NOW! https://www.horrormonthly.com/horror-guys-guides/christopher-lee-films* Check out our selection of short horror biographies, including Christopher Lee, Boris Karloff, Vincent Price, and many more: https://www.hourlongpress.com/* The latest issue of “Horror Monthly,” issue #46 is now on sale! Check out all the back issues, as well as our other books, with one easy link: https://horrormonthly.com* One of my favorite writing and organizing tools is Workflowy, the endless outliner. Check it out at https://workflowy.com/invite/4958355e.lnxMainstream Films:2025 Final Destination: Bloodlines* Directed by: Zach Lipovsky, Adam B. Stein* Written by: Guy Busick, Lori Evans Taylor, Jon Watts* Stars: Kaitlyn Santa Juana, Teo Briones, Rya Kihlstedt* Run Time: 1 Hour, 50 Minutes* Trailer: Spoiler-Free Judgment ZoneThis one starts out with an amazing disaster scene, which of course is prevented because it was actually just a vision by the main participant - a familiar formula. But then we get to find out how that connects to all the movies so far and the events of this one. It’s more of the same as death takes people in strange ways, and Tony Todd has a nice wrap up in this one in his final film role. It’s decent all around, and if you’ve seen and enjoyed the other movies in the series you ought to enjoy this one too.Spoilery SynopsisA man and a woman in a blindfold drive to her “surprise,” and it’s the 1960s. They stop at “The Skyview,” a Space Needle-like building that’s just opening. As they walk in, the camera focuses on random stuff, as they always do in these films. They board an overcrowded elevator that doesn’t close properly. There are red flags everywhere as the door cracks open hundreds of feet above the ground.They arrive at the top safely, and it’s very nice. And scary. She doesn’t like heights, and it’s not so much fun after all. She can’t stop looking at the dance floor’s glass bottom. A stranger talks to her about being pregnant. Iris’s boyfriend takes her up to the observation deck and proposes to her. A kid throws a penny off the tower, which gets sucked into an air vent and jams a fan.In the dance room, they do “Shout,” and the place gets hopping and rocking. It’s almost too obvious what’s going to happen. The floor shatters, and everyone falls to their deaths. But that’s not all, there’s a gas leak that explodes and kills the ones who didn’t fall. It’s full-on panic, the elevator goes back, and even the stairway is a deathtrap. The whole tower starts to fall over, turning the room sideways. Everyone dies–Stefani Reyes wakes up from her nightmare in the middle of math class, in modern times. She’s had this dream over and over. Stefani’s grandmother was named Iris, but she’s never even met her. Stefani goes home to her father’s house to find out more about her mysterious grandma. Her father would just as soon Iris’s name never come up again.Stefani and her brother Charlie go to visit their cousins and Aunt Brenda and Uncle Howard. She wants to talk to Howard about his mother, Iris. When Stefani mentions The Skyview, they all clam up. “Iris Campbell is a deeply disturbed woman.” The old woman got so Death-obsessed that they took her children away. Aunt Brenda is more sympathetic and gives her an address.Stefani drives way out to the country to find old Iris, who lives in a gated fortress. The compound is very post-apocalyptic-looking, and the inside of the house is weird as well.Stefani tells Iris about the dream. Iris says that was her premonition years ago. We flash back to what really happened. Iris ran through the restaurant and told everyone what was going to happen. Everyone lived! Eventually, they tore down the building; she stopped the disaster.Death, on the other hand, doesn’t like to be cheated. He came back and killed everyone who escaped him that day, in the order they would have died. Iris is the only one alive; she’s also clearly crazy, and Stefani picks up on that easily enough. “Death is coming for our family!” The family shouldn’t even exist since she was meant to die at the tower. Stefani leaves in a hurry, but Iris gives her a book of notes and crazy stuff. To prove it, Iris dies gruesomely right in front of Stefani.Fast-forwarding to the funeral, the whole family, including Stefani’s estranged mother, Darlene, shows up. Afterward, there’s a family barbecue. We see a glass break and get mixed in with the ice. Stefani reads Iri’s book and sees notes about the previous films, and the camera

Jul 6, 202536 min

No Choice, Palm Springs International Short Fest

This time around, we’ve only one full-length film, an indie called “No Choice” (2025), which has just been released. Other than that, we’re focusing on a whole bunch of new short films. This week, the Palm Springs International ShortFest happened, with 311 short films from 64 countries. We’ve watched all the ones that are horror or horror-adjacent and brought them here for you.“The Horror Guys Guide to the Horror Films of Christopher Lee” is available NOW!https://www.horrormonthly.com/horror-guys-guides/christopher-lee-filmsCheck out our selection of short horror biographies, including Christopher Lee, Boris Karloff, Vincent Price, and many more: https://www.hourlongpress.com/The latest issue of “Horror Monthly” is now on sale! Check out all the back issues, as well as our other books, with one easy link: https://horrormonthly.comOne of my favorite writing and organizing tools is Workflowy, the endless outliner. Check it out at https://workflowy.com/invite/4958355e.lnxMainstream Films:2025 No Choice* Directed by: Nate Hilgartner* Written by: Nate Hilgartner* Stars: Hannah Deale, Jennifer Herzog, Robert Denzel Edwards* Run Time: 1 Hour, 35 Minutes* Trailer: Spoiler-Free Judgment ZoneThe horror elements in this one are those in the real world. A character who is trapped, stressed beyond limits, beaten down at every turn, and having nightmares. It’s low budget, but the acting, direction, and camera work more than compensate. Don’t expect classic horror, but we’d recommend it for a good drama.Spoilery SynopsisAmy’s having a dream where she finds twenty bucks and a pill. She wakes up to find her life isn’t so interesting. She listens to the man on the radio rant about abortion. Amy argues with her mother, Debra, about medication; Debra appears to be an addict. Credits roll.As Amy rides her bike to work, we see that she lives in a rural farming area. We’re told that it’s “Week 0.” She and her coworker Lucas joke and play at the gas station where she works. Boss Randy comes in and chews them out for not wearing name tags; he’s a jerk.In the morning, Amy goes to her Sociology class and then home to her mother, who’s taken almost the whole bottle of pills. The next night, she flirts with the same customer she met last night. That night, she fantasizes about the guy. The man, Seth, invites her out for real, not long after, and she goes with him. One thing leads to another, and soon they’re having sex in his truck. During the act, the cheap gas-station condom breaks.Amy has a terrifying dream about things leaking. She Googles “morning after pills,” but they’re pricey and she has no credit card for online purchases. She prays instead. She thinks about it and goes to the drugstore, but a friend of her mother’s works there, so that’s not gonna work. She rides to a pharmacy in the next town over, and she’s a couple of dollars short. That night, she dreams about eggs.Amy finally gets the money for a morning-after pill and takes it immediately, but it’s been more hours than recommended for the drug to be useful. This leads to more terrifying dreams. Weeks pass.Amy registers for her next college class, just one at a time. Also, her period is late. She watches videos about “abortion pills” and then starts puking. Yeah, she’s pregnant.Amy goes to the emergency room with a fake accident, and they know she’s lied on the intake forms about her identity. The doctor is pretty understanding and tells her to go to an OB-GYN, but can’t do much about the pregnancy. She points out that abortion is illegal in this state, but she “doesn’t tell her about” the options in other states.Lucas covers for Amy at the store, she doesn’t show up, and Lucas ends up getting fired for it.Debra’s pharmacist friend, who sells her drugs, gets arrested. Amy tells her about the pregnancy, and Debra wants her to have the baby. Debra promises to quit the drugs, starting now, and clean up her act. More nightmares follow.Amy goes to the OB and sees the baby on the ultrasound. She asks him about abortion, but he is not supportive at all. Debra quickly falls off the wagon, and she gets nasty with Amy about it. Desperate, Amy calls Seth but can’t talk to him.Debra overdoses, and it’s going to be expensive for the hospital. When she recovers, Amy asks her for help in getting to the next state for an abortion, but she’s too far gone to talk about it.She calls Seth again and tells him what’s up. He agrees to drive her for an abortion, but Randy won’t give her the time off. He fires her over this. When she gets to Seth’s, he delays and makes her wait. After many hours, it’s too late to go all the way there. He seems like a nice guy, but she dreams about being chained up and trapped. Also, he might be a serial killer. When she has a nightmare about him killing her, she pulls a knife on Seth, who freaks out and drives away, leaving her… wherever she is.Amy leaves the motel and wanders off into the nearby woods to find the purple weeds she heard about on YouTube. It’s s

Jun 29, 202534 min

Ep 339Clown in a Cornfield, Bogieville, Silent Zone, Killers from Space, and Feed the Gods

This time around, we’ll watch three new releases and two oldies. We’ll start off with the better-than-expected “Clown in a Cornfield,” then move on to the godawful “Bogieville.” “Silent Zone” was pretty good, while “Feed the Gods” (2014) was pretty mediocre. For an eye-popping experience, we’ll finish off with “Killers from Space” from way back in 1954.“The Horror Guys Guide to the Horror Films of Christopher Lee” is available NOW!https://www.horrormonthly.com/horror-guys-guides/christopher-lee-filmsCheck out our selection of short horror biographies, including Christopher Lee, Boris Karloff, Vincent Price, and many more: https://www.hourlongpress.com/The latest issue of “Horror Monthly” is now on sale! Check out all the back issues, as well as our other books, with one easy link: https://horrormonthly.comOne of my favorite writing and organizing tools is Workflowy, the endless outliner. Check it out at https://workflowy.com/invite/4958355e.lnxMainstream Films:2025 Clown in a Cornfield* Directed by: Eli Craig* Written by: Carter Blanchard, Eli Craig, Adam Cesare* Stars: Katie Douglas, Aaron Abrams, Carson MacCormac* Run Time: 1 Hour, 36 Minutes* Trailer: * Buy it: https://amzn.to/3ZT7nhJSpoiler-Free Judgment ZoneThis was a very well made entry into the slasher genre, done more seriously than we expected. There are some laughs, but it’s mostly done straight with a bit of satire. The acting, effects, story, direction, all the elements were very well put together. It moves well and doesn’t drag. Brian liked it quite a bit, but Kevin was left feeling kind of meh.Spoilery SynopsisIt’s 1991 at a barn party. A girl plays with a jack-in-the-box with a clown and then goes off into the cornfield to get naked with her boyfriend. They are soon chased and killed by… a clown in the cornfield! Credits roll.In the present day, Quinn and her father, Dr. Glenn Maybrook, move to a very large house in a very small town. He’s the new town doctor. He bought the house unseen, and it has some issues. They see a big old farm factory across the cornfield. There’s no cell service or even wifi in this old house.Quinn meets Rust, the neighbor, who walks Quinn to school. He gives her some tips about the area and the school. The entire class picks on Mr. Vern, the teacher, and he’s a jerk about it. She gets detention right away, and she meets all the cool kids there. They talk about how Kettle Springs is stuck in the 90s, and Founder’s Day is this weekend. Baypen Corn Syrup is the main industry in town, and the clown is their logo. The kids have made videos about that clown being a serial killer, just for fun.After school, Sheriff Dunne says hello to the new doctor. He recommends that Quinn stay away from a group of kids, who just happen to be her new friends. The group easily manages to steal alcohol from the convenience store but they pay for it as well. Cole and his friends were blamed for setting the Baypen factory on fire, but they say they didn’t do it.Suddenly, the group is attacked by a clown! No, it’s a prank video as the teens make another “serial killer clown” video. Quinn tells Cole that her mother overdosed last summer, and her father needed a change, so here they are.Later that night, Tucker, the guy who wore the clown costume in the video, is home alone and sees a clown on the Ring camera. He finds the same jack-in-the-box we saw earlier. Then the clown comes out of nowhere and kills him.Cole gets in trouble with his parents; his father is the town mayor, and he’s running the Founder’s Day celebration. Janet and Ronnie tell Cole and Quinn that they want to do another video since the last one got so many views.The parade goes… badly, and the teens get blamed and arrested for it. The old harbinger in their jail cell says, “You are dead. Never f**k with Frendo.” What? Who?Matt, another of the teens, finds the jack-in-the-box on his weight bench. When he gets back to lifting, the clown beheads him.Quinn’s father overreacts and grounds Quinn, so she sneaks out for the big party tonight. Cole shows her a jack-in-the-box with branding from the Baypen company and then they nearly run over Rust, who’s been hunting. Cole and Rust used to be friends until the factory burned down.The party is at the same barn as from 1991. Tucker and Matt haven’t shown up, so the remaining teens think they’re planning a new prank. It’s quite an elaborate party, and it leads to Quinn and Cole making out in the barn until he rejects her.Ginger comes out of the woods and “dies” in front of everyone, who assume it’s another prank video until someone throws Matt’s severed head at them. They all assume that’s fake as well until Frendo the clown comes in and kills more teens with his crossbow. Rust ends up shooting the clown; he says everyone’s tires have been slashed. Suddenly, more clowns appear. It’s a whole posse of insane clowns. Of course, there’s no 911 signal.With all the teens locked in the barn, Rust and Cole reveal that they used to be involved, w

Jun 22, 202543 min

Sinners, Cannibal Mukbang, Hot Fuzz, Tucker & Dale vs Evil, and The Man from Planet X

We’ve got two amazing new releases and three fun oldies this week. We’ll start off with the critically acclaimed “Sinners” that’s just come to streaming. We’ll then stop for a snack with “Cannibal Mukbang,” another tasty new release. We’ll do a couple of comedy-horrors next, “Hot Fuzz” (2007) and “Tucker and Dale vs. Evil” (2010). Lastly, we’ll go way back in time and meet “The Man from Planet X” from 1951.“The Horror Guys Guide to the Horror Films of Christopher Lee” is available NOW!https://www.horrormonthly.com/horror-guys-guides/christopher-lee-filmsCheck out our selection of short horror biographies, including Christopher Lee, Boris Karloff, Vincent Price, and many more: https://www.hourlongpress.com/The latest issue of “Horror Monthly” is now on sale! Check out all the back issues, as well as our other books, with one easy link: https://horrormonthly.comOne of my favorite writing and organizing tools is Workflowy, the endless outliner. Check it out at https://workflowy.com/invite/4958355e.lnxMainstream Films:2025 Sinners* Directed by: Ryan Coogler* Written by: Ryan Coogler* Stars: Michael B. Jordan, Miles Caton, Saul Williams* Run Time: 2 Hours, 17 Minutes* Get it here: https://amzn.to/45Vl2s8* Trailer: Spoiler-Free Judgment ZoneIt’s very much a humanity and period drama with magic and horror in the background, at first. Then things get crazy toward the second half. The cast, direction, music, and effects are all excellent. Especially the use of music. It’s on the long side but worth it.Spoilery SynopsisIt’s 1932 in Clarksdale, Mississippi. A man with a broken guitar walks into church, and the preacher gets really upset, changing the sermon to talk about men who are full of sin. He wants Sammie to give up his sinful ways. We get flashes of violence and blood.We flash back to the cotton farm, where all the black people work in the fields; it’s after slavery, but the echoes of it are still strong. We then cut again to two brothers, Smoke and Stack, who are dressed up with a fancy car. Mr. Hogwood shows up and shows them some property. It gets a little tense, but they’ve got a bagful of money and buy it.Sammie argues with his preacher father about going out for the evening. “You keep going out with the devil, sooner or later, you’re gonna bring him home.” He goes off with Stack and Smoke, saying he’ll be back for service tomorrow. They’ve got big plans for the day and night.The three are planning on putting a juke joint together, with lots of drinking, at the old sawmill they just bought. Stack runs into Mary, an old jilted lover, and a white looking woman as well, so she could be trouble. The harmonica player, Delta Slim, tells a story about why black folks shouldn’t get too successful.Smoke goes to see Annie about cooking at the juke joint tonight, and they have a long history. We get a montage of everyone setting up for the party, including the cooking.Elsewhere, a dirty-looking and injured white man beats on a door and asks a white couple for shelter from the Choctaws. He offers them money to let him inside, and they invite him in. A short while later, a Choctaw scout with others shows up, and he says he’s looking for a dangerous man who’s not what he seems. She lies and says she hasn’t seen him. They soon leave, and the strange man kills the couple, who should’ve never invited him in. Before long, all three of them are vampires.Mary shows up to the big party, and she looks a little out of place there. Stack wants her out of there before trouble breaks out; she’s part black in the family, but has been passing for years, a prime target for lynching.Delta Slim finishes his piano set and introduces Sammie, who plays the guitar. The magic of music fills the room. We see a guy playing an electric guitar and half the crowd is dressed like anachronistic rappers, ancient Africans, and even Asian musicians and dancers thanks to the Asian grocer and his wife. (I guess the Blues are timeless?). They are having a goooood time.And then the three vampires, Bert, Joan, and Remmick, show up outside. They talk to the doorman/bouncer and want it. They pull out instruments and start playing; they say they just want to join the party, and they’re pretty good bluegrass singers as well. Smoke does not want to let them in.Smoke gives Sammie some career advice; he wants to keep his young cousin out of trouble, but Sammie thinks he might want to go to Chicago like the twins did.Mary wants to talk to the white trio about coming back; the twins are going to need every dollar they can get. She finds them playing their music right outside the barn. They’ve very friendly– until they aren’t.When Mary returns to the party, she needs an invitation to come inside. The vampires start picking off people as they go outside to pee. As Smoke deals with a cheating gambler, Stack and Mary make out; she’s drooling. We see that yes, they did turn her outside. By the time Smoke and Sammie come in, they’re both covered in Stack's blood. Smoke w

Jun 15, 202544 min

Piglet, Consecration, Self Driver, Hellraiser: Revelations, and House of Wax

We’ve got three new releases this week as well as a pair of oldies. We’ll open on the not-Poohverse “Piglet” and then go to church for “Consecration.” For our oldies, we’ll take a look at one more episode that even Pinhead didn’t show up for in “Hellraiser: Revelations” from 2011, followed by the remake of “House of Wax” from 2005. And we’ve got more shorts as well!“The Horror Guys Guide to the Horror Films of Christopher Lee” is available NOW!https://www.horrormonthly.com/horror-guys-guides/christopher-lee-filmsCheck out our selection of short horror biographies, including Christopher Lee, Boris Karloff, Vincent Price, and many more: https://www.hourlongpress.com/The latest issue of “Horror Monthly” is now on sale! Check out all the back issues, as well as our other books, with one easy link: https://horrormonthly.comMainstream Films:2025 Piglet* Directed by Andrea M. Catinella* Written by Harry Boxley* Stars Alexander Butler, Lauren Staerck, Alina Desmond* Run Time: 1 Hour, 23 Minutes* Trailer: Spoiler-Free Judgment ZoneThis isn’t the Piglet from “Pooh: Blood and Honey,” it’s a separate tale. This Piglet is a big, mutated guy wearing a mask and having a big appetite for killing. Reminiscent of Leatherface from “The Texas Chainsaw Massacre” movies. The music and accents required subtitles. Brian was harsher on it than Kevin was, who found it entertaining more than not. But we both agree it didn’t show us enough new to really be interesting. It’s not a standout film, and we thought it was okay at best.Spoilery SynopsisA prison van stops in the woods so the driver can pee. “Is it true what they say about him? About the experiment… and his family?” The prisoner was part of a scientific experiment that deformed him. Dr. Bickley turned the scrawny man into a huge killing machine. He then murdered the people in the prison. Naturally, the prisoner gets out of his chains and kills all three of the inept security guards. The masked killer returns to his lair and puts on a pig mask. Credits roll.A carload of party girls stop on the side of the road so one of them can throw up. Kate is upset about hiding from her insane boyfriend. Two other girls talk about the pig serial-killer who used to operate in this area. A man comes out of the woods and tells them not to go to the camp, as bad things always happen there.A man in a cowboy hat talks to Piglet about the girls who will be coming to stay at the farm. Piglet can have his pick of one of the girls; the rest will go in the freezer.The girls arrive at Mr. Hogarth’s farm for the first time in ten years. Kate sees Piglet in the woods, but only for a moment. Mr. Hogarth, the man in the cowboy hat, shows the girls around; he runs the camp.On the road, three other people stop their car with a breakdown and have to walk the rest of the way to camp through the forest. Courtney is autistic or something and forces them to stop so she can draw. As they wait, the other two stop for sex. Piglet kills the couple, Riley and Bruce, with a big meat hook. Courtney goes looking for them and finds herself in a bear trap until Piglet catches up to her.Kate gets a scare from a man covered in blood. The police come and pick up the homeless man as Mr. Hogarth assures the girls that animals won’t come into the camp. One of the girls tells the story about the local serial killer they used to call “Piglet,” who fell in love with a girl named Kate.Judith soon finds Courtney chained up in the barn and hides while Piglet comes in and kills Courtney with a hook before killing Judith as well.Kate and Susie talk about Spencer, Kate’s crazy ex, who used to follow her around and stalk her. She feels like that again. They both plan to move to Salt Lake City. Meanwhile, Alex and Dianne make out in the hot tub as Mr. Hogarth watches. Hogarth then kills Dianne with an axe.Alex, Kate, and Susie wonder what happened to all their friends. They talk about making a phone call, but try to drive to town instead; the car has been sabotaged.Hogarth and Piglet work together to kill Alex with a sledgehammer. Kate thinks Spencer has followed them and is causing all their troubles. Bret, the weird harbinger from the woods, shows up and tells them they need to leave– he offers them gas for their car. They soon see Piglet, and the chase is on. Bret shoots Piglet, and then the girls take his gun and force him to drive them to town. Bret explains the whole thing, but Susie and Kate are skeptical. Hogarth comes outside and blames Bret for keeping a bloodthirsty monster on the grounds.Piglet shows up and kills Bret while Hogart shoots Susie in the leg. Piglet takes Susie to the barn and chains her up. He then peels her face off with the help of his knife.Kate runs to the road and flags down a cop, Officer Burke, who handcuffs her and takes her back to Hogarth and Piglet. They all sit around and sing “Happy Birthday to you” to Kate. Instead of a birthday cake, they give her a foot with a candle wedged on top; they’re cannibal

Jun 8, 202543 min

Fear Street 1994, Fear Street 1978, Fear Street 1666, Fear Street Prom Queen, and A Hard Place

This week, we look at all four films in the Netflix series “Fear Street.” The first trilogy came out in 2021, and “Prom Queen” is a new, marginally connected new release. We’ll also watch a cool new indie film, “A Hard Place,” with so many monsters! Oh yeah— shorts have returned. We have four of them for you this week, with more on the way!“The Horror Guys Guide to the Horror Films of Christopher Lee” is available NOW!https://www.horrormonthly.com/horror-guys-guides/christopher-lee-filmsCheck out our selection of short horror biographies, including Christopher Lee, Boris Karloff, Vincent Price, and many more: https://www.hourlongpress.com/The latest issue of “Horror Monthly” is now on sale! Check out all the back issues, as well as our other books, with one easy link: https://horrormonthly.com[Affiliate Link] Try Workflowy, a great do-it-all outliner: https://workflowy.com/invite/4958355e.lnxMainstream Films:2021 Fear Street Part One - 1994* Directed by Leigh Janiak* Written by R.L. Stine, Kyle Killen, Phil Graziadei* Stars Kiana Madeira, Olivia Scott Welch, Benjamin Flores Jr. * Run Time: 1 Hour, 47 Minutes* Trailer: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=z9PuKH4hKSUSpoiler-Free Judgment ZoneA lot of teenagers in their 20s go through drama, romance and horror as they try to fight a witchy evil that’s been tainting their town for hundreds of years. There are a lot of 1990s references that are hit and miss, but they mostly get the vibe right. It’s well made overall, and there are some good moments, but we found much of it dull and predictable. It’s certainly not the worst thing we’ve seen, but we were pretty lukewarm toward it.Spoilery SynopsisA woman buys a book at the B. Dalton’s in a mall full of stores, so we know this is the 90s. Heather answers a phone call from Ryan, but the line drops. He gives her a jump scare using a blow-up sex doll, and they get separated again. Suddenly, a man in a skull-faced Halloween costume attacks her with a knife. She runs to another store and calls 911. She whomps him with a lava lamp, but he eventually catches and stabs her. As we hear gunfire, the killer pulls off his mask, and it’s Ryan. As the cop shoots him, both teenagers die in the middle of the food court. Credits roll as we hear news reports that Shadyside has all kinds of crazy slashers and murders. Deena watches the news as Sheriff Nick talks about all the town’s serial killers. She yells at her little brother Josh about running up the AOL bill with the Internet. He’s in chat rooms on AOL talking about the serial killer and the massacre last night at the mall. At school, everyone thinks “The Witch” is back, and that seems to be all anyone talks about. There’s a lot of very typical high school drama as the school has a memorial service for Heather and Ryan. Mayor Goode is there, and he addresses the crowd. Deena runs into her ex, Samantha, and returns a bunch of stuff she borrowed from her. Sheriff Goode talks next, as Deena and Sam argue about Sam moving to Sunnyvale, away from Shadyside. The memorial service soon turns into a big brawl as the two football teams fight. They all seem to attend a school with no adults present, not even a bus driver. On the way home, the Sunnyvalers' car attacks the Shadysiders’ bus, and that goes badly. When the car goes off the road, Sam sees something. The next night, Deena sees Skullface outside and runs him off, then she goes to her friend Kate’s house. Kate and her brother then tell the story to Josh and Deena. They all assume it’s Peter, Sam’s new boyfriend. They go to the hospital, where Peter has been with Sam all day. As Deena and Sam argue, someone stabs Peter in the back, as this is one of those hospitals without any staff or other patients. After much running around and fighting, Deena knocks the killer's mask off, and it’s Ryan– again, even though he’s clearly already been killed. They talk to Sheriff Goode, who doesn’t believe them, since they’re accusing the kid the sheriff killed just last night. On the way out of the police station, Deena shoots a girl who doesn’t die after attacking Simon. Josh listens to Simon’s story and recognizes Ruby Lane, a woman who killed her friends and herself thirty years ago in 1965. He has a crazy wall full of old news clippings of slashers and murders in the town. Normal people keep turning into psychos, and it goes all the way back to 1666. Sarah Fier was a witch, and she’s been possessing people to use as killers. Sarah remembers seeing the witch in the woods, so the whole group goes out there to look. They find Sarah’s bones and try to bury them to put the witch back to rest. They get chased by a man in a scarecrow mask with an axe. The witch is not back at rest. Sam thinks the killers are specifically coming for her. The killers seem to be able to smell Sam’s blood, which is on Simon’s shirt and Deena’s shoe. They break into the high school to take clothes from the lost and found. This involves everyone taking off their shirts and get

Jun 1, 202543 min

Kryptik, Bloody Axe Wound, Shin Ultraman, Godzilla vs Megalon, and Jack Brooks: Monster Slayer

A weird mix for you this time around. We've got an updated version of Ultraman with "Shin Ultraman," along with another old Godzilla film, "Godzilla vs Megalon." We meet up with "Jack Brooks, Monster Slayer," and then learn about cryptid hunters with "Kryptik" before meeting a weird family in "Bloody Axe Wound."Check out our selection of short horror biographies: https://www.hourlongpress.com/The latest issue of "Horror Monthly" is now on sale! Check out all the back issues, as well as our other books, with one easy link: https://horrormonthly.comMainstream Films:2024 Kryptik* Directed by Kourtney Roy* Written by Paul Bromley* Stars Chloe Pirrie, Jeff Gladstone, Jason Deline* Run Time: 1 Hour, 36 Minutes* Trailer: Spoiler-Free Judgment ZoneWhat seems to start out as a simple cryptid-in-the-woods story that steadily gets more complicated as a curious woman, who seems to have amnesia, retraces the steps of a missing cryptid hunter. Full of strange and interesting characters and things that make you wonder what's going on, it's a good one that keeps you involved right to the end with an ambiguous wrap up. We both liked it, but it might not be for everyone.Spoilery SynopsisA woman drives through the forest to a very isolated place. She eventually arrives with a group -- the women's walking club on Krypto Peak. Kay has joined the group, hoping to make some friends, but she sits alone and ignores everyone else. The tour guide tells them about Barb Valentine, a local cryptozoologist who went missing a while back. He explains what cryptids are. She was here for the Sooka, a tall, hairy creature, something like Bigfoot with a mole face.Kay soon wanders off alone and encounters the creature, even getting it on video. She runs to the nearest campground as the tour group wonders what happened to her. She sneaks back among the group and pretends that she was with them all along. She's... odd. When she gets back to her car, she checks her driver's license and sees that it says, "Kay Hall." She acts surprised.She goes home and goes through the whole house, looking to see if she's alone. In the morning, she goes through all her clothes and continues to explore the place. She eventually looks through her video camera at the footage but gets interrupted by the phone. It's Don, her boss, who wants her to come in this afternoon. She gets there but decides not to stay when she finds out she works in a vet office.At home again, she starts researching Barb Valentine, and the photo shown is... her. Suddenly, someone breaks into her house; she runs to the car and drives away. She wakes up at 3:15 the next day parked out in the woods, and her legs are covered in mud. She drives to Blue Cliff, the last known place where Barb was supposed to have visited as she listens to a podcast about Sooka in the car.Kay talks to Sally, the woman who runs the motel, about Barb. "Oh yes! The monster hunter! It's terrible that all the people are going missing around here. It's like the forest swallows them up." That night, she watches a video of Barb's last interview, and Barb looks exactly like her.In the morning, Sally isn't around. Kay drives on to the next location that Barb was supposed to have visited and goes into the woods. She soon runs into a hairy monster... no, it's Starla, a hunter in a camo outfit. Kay goes home with the strange woman, who takes her home and pulls out a scrapbook about Sooka. Starla's daughter, Diane, was taken by the Sooka ten years ago. Kay shows Starla her video and talks about forgetting who she is. Then Kay passes out.When she wakes up, Kay is alone, and her feet are dirty. But she does run into another woman who gives her directions and suddenly vanishes. She sees a "Missing" poster for Diane later, and it's the woman from the woods.Kay watches videos about Morgan, Barb's husband, who is desperately trying to find her. She goes to a bar and talks to a former magician who's just a full-time drunk now. The drunk gives her another lead on the Sooka. Kay starts seeing things; maybe she's the monster after all.She drives to the next place and talks to Johnette, who is supposed to have seen the creature. Inside, she sees a book that Barb wrote, and it's got a business card inside. Johnette thinks she looks like one of those monster hunters who used to come around. The Sooka tried to break into her trailer a while back, and she describes the creature.Johnette invites her to the big trailer park party tonight. An old man there talks about the Sooka travelling through portals to get around. Another woman there talks about sleepwalking and waking up covered in mud. Sasha recognizes who she really is and asks what happened. "People like us got to stick together." She gets really high and goes off with Caleb, Johnette's boyfriend, and they do naughty, possibly inhuman, things in the woods.Kay/Barb walks home to Morgan, who is shocked to see her. She stinks, so he cleans her up and wonders why she doesn't speak much. He seems

May 25, 202529 min

Screamboat, The Ugly Stepsister, Screamboat, Peter Pan’s Neverland Nightmare, and Final Destination 5

It’s “We Have Disney At Home” week here with the Horror Guys. This time, we’ll take a look at three recent “fairy tale” movies: “Screamboat” (2025), “The Ugly Stepsister” (2025), and “Peter Pan’s Neverland Nightmare” (2024). We’ll then watch the classic sci-fi alien invasion thriller, “Earth vs. the Flying Saucers” from 1956. We’ll then finish up the “Final Destination” series with the 2011 final installment (at least until later this month).Hey– we just released “H.P. Lovecraft: The Biography.” It’s available exclusively at Amazon.The latest issue of “Horror Monthly” is now on sale! Check out all the back issues, as well as our other books, with one easy link: https://horrormonthly.comMainstream Films:2025 The Ugly Stepsister* Directed by Emilie Blichfeldt* Written by Emilie Blichfeldt* Stars Lea Myren, Ane Dahl Torp, Thea Sofie Loch Naess* Run Time: 1 Hour, 49 Minutes* Trailer: Spoiler-Free Judgment ZoneThis is a telling of “Cinderella” primarily from the viewpoint of one of the stepsisters. She’s fixated on the handsome prince, and she’s willing to take some extreme steps to become beautiful enough to catch his eye. What she goes through, and puts herself through, starts out horrifying and gets worse as things go along. The body horror is top notch, and we thought it was very good.Spoilery SynopsisWe watch as Elvira reads a book of romantic writings and poetry by Prince Julian, and it’s clear she’s smitten with him. Rebekka, Elvira, and her sister, Alma, are moving to her mother’s new husband’s castle. Her new stepsister, Agnes, shows her around. Elvira’s wearing braces, so we know she’s the ugly stepsister. As the happy couple enjoy their wedding cake, old Otto suddenly coughs up blood and dies. Credits roll.Agnes blames her father’s marriage on Rebekka’s money, but Rebekka married Otto for his money. There are already men there to repossess the castle. Elvira says she can get married to bring in some income, but Rebekka knows that’s not gonna happen, as she’s hopeless. But maybe they can improve her?In the morning, they get notice that the king and Prince Julian are putting on a ball for the virgins of the countryside. Agnes gets right in, but Elvira gets hers under the name “Elvira von Stepsister.” Elvira wants to marry the prince, and she has fantasies.The doctor talks about removing Elvira’s braces, but he doesn’t like her nose and wants to fix that. Rebekka offers to pay double… after the ball.Oh, the surgery. That’s something. Wonking it with a chisel to break her nose and reshape it. Still, she has perfect teeth afterward. Later, we see her in a metal nose-brace. Miss Sophie welcomes them all to finishing school, where she gets put in the back of the dance class with the other ugly girls.Agnes goes to visit her dead father, who still hasn’t been buried yet, and flies are everywhere. Elvira volunteers to do a dance for the class, and the teacher mocks her by saying she has wasted talent. The teacher prefers Agnes, who isn’t so ugly or fat.The head of the school gives Elvira a tapeworm egg. If she swallows it, she’ll lose weight. Alma says, “You’re sick in the head.” Meanwhile, Agnes makes out with Isak, the stable boy. She loves him but she knows she needs to marry the prince.Elvira runs into Prince Julian in the woods by accident. He’s pretty mean, and his pals are jerks, and she runs away. On the other hand, she still wants and fantasizes about him. She gets home in time to catch Agnes and Isak banging away in the barn. Elvira tells of course. When Rebekka hears about that, she sends Isak harshly away. She goes crazy over Agnes and puts her to work with the servants.Three months pass, and Elvira has her metal nose brace removed. It all looks really good under there– and she’s thinner too! She goes back to the plastic surgeon, Dr. Esthetique, who sews on eyelash implants. There’s a great deal of screaming involved. Around this point, she’s taken to calling Agnes “Cinderella.”Later, both Agnes and Elvira notice that Elvira’s hair is falling out. That night, Rebekka brings in a man with a big crate. “I’m your good fairy,” he says. He has a fancy dress for her in the crate; she’s going to get to dance for the prince after all. The dressmaker is all over Elvira, but Rebekka’s OK with that. Then he notices the hair loss as well, but he’s got a wig for her.Agnes/Cinderella plans to go to the ball, but Elvira tears up her dress. She cries over her father’s still-rotting corpse until the ghost of her dead mother appears. The father bought a new dress, including shoes. The mother warns that at midnight, her coach will become a pumpkin.It’s time for the ball, and Elvira arrives looking great. As all the eligible young women are introduced with great ceremony, the men there drool over them and talk lasciviously amongst themselves. She bows in front of the prince, whose jerk friends like her boobs. When she and her two classmates do their dance for him, he’s much more impressed with her. Throughout all this,

May 18, 202539 min

Call of Cthulhu, The Resurrected, Castle Freak, Lurking Fear, and Necronomicon

It’s Lovecraft week here with the Horror Guys. We’ve got five adaptations of stories from H.P. Lovecraft. We’ve done many others in the past, but if you know of any that we haven’t talked about, drop us a note! This time, we’ll do “The Call of Cthulhu,” a unique film from 2005. The next four are all from the 90s: “The Resurrected” from 1991, “Necronomicon: Book of the Dead” from 1993, “Lurking Fear” from 1995, and “Castle Freak” from 1995.Why Lovecraft week? Because we’ve got a new book out: “H.P. Lovecraft: A Biography,” which you can pick up right here: https://amzn.to/435mJQJThe latest issue of “Horror Monthly” is now on sale! Check out all the back issues, as well as our other books, with one easy link: https://horrormonthly.comMainstream Films:2005 The Call of Cthulhu* Directed by Andrew Leman* Written by H.P. Lovecraft, Sean Branney* Stars Matt Foyer, John Bolen, Ralph Lucas* Run Time: 47 Minutes* Trailer: * Buy it: https://amzn.to/3ETYIEgSpoiler-Free Judgment ZoneThis version was like a trip to the old days of silent films. It’s black and white, interspaced with speech panels instead of dialogue, with a music soundtrack. They did capture the look and feel of a movie from the 20s, though the film speed and quality didn’t quite match how it used to be. It’s a pretty good telling of the story, it’s short, and it’s worth checking out.Spoilery SynopsisTwo men talk about one of their great-uncle’s life work. The man wants the other man to burn the stories. He tells us that he was the executor of the old man’s estate, including a locked box full of folders and news clippings.It tells the story of Henry Wilcox, who has a new wood carving of something he saw in a dream last night and takes it to the narrator’s great uncle. He felt the earthquake last night very strongly. All through his dream last night, something was calling to him with a name he couldn’t pronounce.The doctor asks Wilcox to start writing down his dreams. He does this, along with many pictures, which greatly upsets him. He continues to show the great-uncle what he’s seen. Henry falls into a fever, and the old man tries to care for him, but once the fever broke, he didn’t get any more visions, nor could he remember the old ones.We cut to the American Archaeological Society, where a detective talks to a professor. He shows them an object, and one man there recognizes it. We get a flashback to a tribe that worshipped a god named Cthulhu. That’s where the man lost his eye. The inspector tells the men his tale from last year, when he investigated some disappearances in the New Orleans swamp. “This ain’t just some Voodoo cult, this is the devil hisself,” says one witness. The cultists were chanting the Cthulhu ritual as the policemen watched. Forty-seven cultists were arrested, and one explains that they worship the Great Old Ones, who sleep now, but will reclaim their world soon. Great Cthulhu lies sleeping in R’yLeh, and he’ll awaken soon.Back in the present, the nephew starts getting strange dreams. Anyone he asked about the cult either knew nothing or was dead. He reads a new article about the Emma, a ship that ran into a storm at sea and started to sink. They all boarded the Alert, an abandoned fishing vessel. The log says the crew went ashore on an island three days ago, but there’s nothing on the map. They found a strange tentacled idol and soon the whole crew was lost except for one man who went mad.The nephew starts putting his dates and facts together, and it’s all very terrifying. He tracks down the idol at a museum and follows the sole survivor of the Alert to Oslo. The man was dead by the time he arrived, but the nephew managed to read the man’s logbook and learned what really happened on the island.The island was covered with jagged peaks and terrifying statuary. One man falls off a tower and dies, and immediately after, there’s an earthquake, and Cthulhu himself shows up. Everyone runs, but only two men make it to the boat. The one who got a good look at the monster goes mad, bleeds from the eyes, and dies. The other is the one man who escaped with the log.The nephew tells all this to his psychiatrist, and we’re back at the beginning, when he told the man to burn all the notebooks. Cthulhu is still out there, waiting to rise. The doctor, naturally, doesn’t burn them, he starts reading…Brian’s CommentaryIt’s a black-and-white silent film, done in the style of a movie from Lovecraft’s day, the 1920s and 30s. It’s done in the style of the old German Expressionist films, and it looks pretty good considering. It was released through the H.P. Lovecraft Historical Society, essentially a fan film. The story, probably Lovecraft’s most famous, has long been considered unfilmable, so this is a good attempt.https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/The_Call_of_Cthulhu_(film)Kevin’s CommentaryThis was an interesting novelty, and it was worth seeing it for that. It’s short, which is a plus, so we got through it before that novelty wore off. I thought it was w

May 11, 202529 min

Ash, Shadow of God, Final Recovery, Godzilla vs. Gigan, and The Final Destination

We’ve got a good mix of old and new this time around, starting with the very sci-fi “Ash” from 2025. Also from this year are “Shadow of God” and “Final Recovery.” We’ll then watch a couple of not-so-new films, with “Godzilla vs. Gigan” (1972) and “The Final Destination” (2009) [The fourth in the series].The latest issue of “Horror Monthly” is now on sale! Check out all the back issues, as well as our other books, with one easy link: https://horrormonthly.comMainstream Films:2025 Ash* Directed by Flying Lotus* Written by Jonni Remmler* Stars Eiza Gonzalez, Aaron Paul, Iko Uwais* Run Time: 1 Hour, 35 Minutes* Trailer: Spoiler-Free Judgment ZoneThis one is a bit of a mystery as the main character wakes up with a foggy memory and tries to piece together what happened on a space station with failing power and multiple bodies. Which gives it a video game quest vibe at times. But things gradually come together as she, and the viewer, figures out what happened and why. The cast is good, the story is compelling, and the effects are excellent. We really liked it.Spoilery SynopsisRiya has flashing visions of people’s heads melting and exploding; it’s all very graphic. The computer announces, “Abnormal activity detected. Systems failure. Reboot.” She wakes up on the floor with blood on her hands. She walks down the hallway, noticing bloody handprints and dead bodies everywhere.She goes outside, and it’s raining ash. She finds more bodies scattered about. She looks up and sees something amazingly weird. Credits roll.She finds that she’s having trouble breathing and barely makes it back inside.Flashback time. Adhi, Kevin, Davis, Clarke, and Riya eat Brion’s Beans, referring to a guy still up in orbit, and talk about who’s going to be the first one outside. They’re the first ones on this planet, ever. The atmosphere is almost breathable, and it may be the best find yet for potential colonization.Back in the present, Riya washes the blood off and wonders, “Who am I?” She walks through the ship, reading notes and watching videos.Suddenly, the computer announces that there’s movement outside the airlock. There’s someone outside banging on the door to get in. Riya attacks the man when he comes in, but quickly finds it’s Brion, who has come down to the surface. He got their distress call; something about Clarke having a psychotic break. She explains that by the time she woke up, everyone had been killed. Other than that, she doesn’t remember anything.Brion tells her that Earth is dying, and they sent out seven expeditions to find a new home. This planet, Ash, is where they sent the seventh ship. He remained aboard the mothership to establish communication with home, but now he’s come down to investigate. He does a medical scan on Riya, and says she’s got a concussion, but is otherwise fine other than the memory loss and minor wound on her forehead that the automatic surgeon robot fixes up.Riya keeps hallucinating the dead faces of her crewmates; could she have been the killer? They wonder where Clarke went, could she still be alive outside? The station is slowly running out of oxygen, so they need to get back up to the orbital. The launch window is in twelve hours.There’s a sandstorm outside, and they get a hull break that needs to be repaired, as they’re losing more oxygen. She fixes the hole, but they have even less time now. They have to leave in five hours, so they may never get any real answers about Clarke.Riya watches recorded footage from the group going outside in their suits. They found a deep tube; someone, but not humanity, has built terraforming equipment on the surface, which is why there’s so much oxygen in the air. Davis drops something into the tube, and it explodes with strange energy, killing him.Riya admits to Brion that she thinks it was her who killed the others, but she doesn’t know why. She wants to stay on the base to get her memory back, but their time-frame for leaving is running out. Brion points out that they’ve found alien technology, and this is about the survival of the species, not just her memories.She remembers more about killing Adhi, but now it looks like he was attacking her and it was self-defense. She goes through the ship and finds Brion, dead, with his head broken up. Clarke is there, in a suit, and she attacks Riya. Riya eventually beats Clarke, using the suit against her.Riya does a post-mortem on Clarke, but doesn’t find any alien contagion.The computer announces that the orbital lineup window is now open, so she has to hurry to the lander to get up to the mothership. The computer on the lander is as messed up as the one on the base, so she goes back to the base.She puts Brion’s body in the medical scanner, and it reports that he’s been dead for 51 hours. Who has she been talking to all this time?“Unusual lifeform detected” announces the computer. It’s Brion. He explains that he’s part of her now. He shows her what happened in her mind. Riya’s crewmates found something alive inside

May 4, 202537 min

The Woman in the Yard, Caddo Lake, 825 Forest Road, Crazy Texas, and Final Destination 3

We’ve got a fun bunch this week. We’ll hang out in the yard with “The Woman in the Yard,” take a visit to “Caddo Lake,” before going home to “825 Forest Road,” which is located in “Crazy, Texas.” Then we’ll all die repeatedly in the third installment of the “Final Destination” Series.The latest issue of “Horror Monthly” is now on sale! Check out all the back issues, as well as our other books, with one easy link: https://horrormonthly.comPick up our newest book, "The Horror Guys Guide to the Academy Awards of Horror" at https://www.horrormonthly.com/horror-guys-guides/academy-awards-of-horrorMainstream Films:2025 The Woman in the Yard* Directed by Jaume Collet-Sera* Written by Sam Stefanak* Stars Danielle Deadwyler, Okwui Okpokwasili, Peyton Jackson* Run Time: 1 Hour, 28 Minutes* Trailer: Spoiler-Free Judgment ZoneThe cast is excellent and it all looks good. They manage to ramp up the tension out of what is sometimes not much, sometimes quite a bit. We do gradually get to piece together what’s really going on more or less. It does have a wrap up, but we found it pretty disappointing in the end.Spoilery SynopsisA woman watches a video of her husband talking about naming their farm. Ramona watches it over and over, clearly depressed. Her son, Taylor, comes in and breaks up the depression; the power is out, and he wants her to call someone. As she finally gets out of bed, we see she’s got a broken leg. She says good morning to her imaginative daughter, Annie, and heads downstairs.Ramona’s husband, David, the man on the video, has obviously recently died, and the family has lots of unpaid bills. The food in the fridge is going to go bad pretty soon, and she can’t call the power company because her phone is dead. We soon get a flashback to the traffic accident that caused all the trouble, but then that’s interrupted when Taylor reports that there’s a strange woman in black out in the yard.When Ramona decides to go outside and see what the woman wants, the kids act terrified of the stranger. It takes forever for Ramona to get to her on crutches, but she makes the attempt. “How did I get here?” the woman asks. She’s weird and seems to know more than she should about her and David. “You called and I came, Ramona.” Ramona gets scared and goes to the garage, where she plugs her dead phone into the car lighter plug. The car is dead, too.Ramona comes back inside and locks all the doors. She makes up a story for Tay and Annie. A little while later, the old woman is now sitting closer to the house. We see that the old woman’s shadow affects things in a bad way.The family dog had been barking non-stop, but Ramona notices it’s gotten awfully quiet outside. She goes outside to see about that and finds nothing– the dog is missing. Taylor wants to drive to a neighbor’s house; Ramona can’t drive in her condition, and Taylor’s not old enough. He wants to walk to a neighbor’s house– it can’t be more than a couple of miles.The old woman gets closer, and Annie steps on something that cuts her foot. While Ramona deals with that, Taylor goes outside to look for the dog. He notices that all the chickens are dead. He goes out to the garage and fears that the woman is stalking him outside the door. He figures out that the car is dead and the dog is gone.Taylor comes inside and accuses Ramona of knowing who the woman outside actually is. Taylor gets his father’s gun out of the safe and threatens the old woman. The woman stands up and walks toward him, taking off her veil. “Your mother’s been lying to you– about everything.” She explains that Ramona lied about the accident that killed David.Taylor confronts Ramona about what really happened that night. They went out to dinner and she told him that she wasn’t happy with her life. She wanted to leave David and the kids, but he made a perfectly reasonable argument. She drove them home in the rain. Ramona notices a woman in black on the road in her rear-view mirror. She’s watching the woman when they hit the other car head-on.Meanwhile, we see Annie inside the house, but the shadows are moving things around to scare her. The shadows menace her, but she doesn’t see them right away. Soon, everything in the house starts moving and flying, and they all see it. They quickly see that if they hide where it’s dark, there are no shadows, so they all go up to the attic.Whatever it is outside, it bangs on the walls and doors, wanting in. Then they start seeing the woman inside the attic. The shadow eventually disappears, and takes Annie with her. They hear Annie downstairs, so Ramona and Taylor go down after her. Ramona goes through a tunnel into a reality where David is there, replaying the scene from her phone. She notices all the words she can read are backwards; it’s some kind of mirror-world.Now, Ramona is the woman in black sitting outside the farmhouse, and we see the first encounter with the woman from her point of view as she talks to herself, a few hours ago. She then replays the scene in the

Apr 28, 202536 min

I Was a Teenage Frankenstein, I Bury the Living, Count Yorga, Vampire, Dracula and Son, and Final Destination 2

It’s another “oldies” week here. We’re starting off with the really dated “I Was a Teenage Frankenstein” from 1957. A year later, we’ll visit the cemetery in “I Bury the Living.” A few years later, we’ve got undead problems with “Count Yorga, Vampire” and “Dracula and Son,” both from the 70s. Last, we’ll look at “Final Destination 2” from 2003.The latest issue of “Horror Monthly” is now on sale! Check out all the back issues, as well as our other books, with one easy link: https://horrormonthly.comPick up our newest book, "The Horror Guys Guide to the Academy Awards of Horror" at https://www.horrormonthly.com/horror-guys-guides/academy-awards-of-horrorMainstream Films:1957 I Was a Teenage Frankenstein* Directed by Herbert L. Storck* Written by Herman Cohen, Abem Kandel* Stars Whit Bissell, Phyllis Coates, Robert Burton* Run Time: 1 Hour, 14 Minutes* Watch it: Spoiler-Free Judgment ZoneProfessor Frankenstein, a descendent of that Frankenstein, has a full facility at his disposal with all the high tech equipment available in 1957, as well as an alligator pit in his lab for disposing of bodies and parts. His ego is big, and so are his plans for advancing science regardless of the cost. This one is decent but low effort, maybe a little rushed at points with such a short run time. It’s entertaining enough, but more campy than classic.Spoilery SynopsisProfessor Frankenstein talks about transplanting eyes and other organs. One of the scientists in the audience says some of his claims are simply impossible. “Dead tissue cannot be activated,” says Dr. Randolph. Frankenstein says one day soon, his theories will be proven.Later, Frankenstein and Dr. Karlton, his physicist friend, talk about proving their ideas. Frankenstein wants to assemble a body from different cadavers. “On my own. In my own laboratory.” Frankenstein talks about that great ancestor whose name he bears. He thinks the key to success is to use young bodies, which are much more resilient— wait! A car crashes outside right in the middle of his explanation. Two cars, and they were full of teenagers, who were all killed. Such a shame and mess, who will notice one missing?Soon, the two scientists have snuck off with one of the bodies and put it in Frankenstein’s own private morgue. He puts the body in a drawer and turns down the temperature. Karlton wants out, but Frankenstein has blackmail material, so he’ll help with the project as required.The two men go upstairs to a party. Frankenstein says he’s going to return home to England soon, and Margaret, his girlfriend and nurse, looks unhappy. He cheers her up by asking her to move in with him as his fiancee.Karlton “activates” the body as Frankenstein amputates his hands and leg and Margaret works the phone upstairs as the new “watchdog.” Frankenstein disposes of the leftover parts by feeding them to an alligator in a closet.Frankenstein and Karlton sneak into a funeral home and take the parts they need after another tragedy. They sew the leg and hands onto the corpse at home.Frankenstein and Margaret go for a drive and park at a popular make-out spot for the local teenagers. She wants to do what the teenagers do.The animated corpse is healing well, and Frankenstein wants the creature to speak. He does speak, and then he cries. Margaret suspects something is up. She’s also obsessed with their impending marriage and displeased with how little of the professor's attention she gets. He slaps her in the face when she gets more uppity than he likes. She doesn’t go along with that very well, and she starts snooping into his work. She makes a key to the basement, opens the morgue drawer, and the corpse sits up. She runs off without locking the door behind her.Frankenstein and the monster talk, and it’s clear that Frankenstein is on a power trip with his obedient creation. The monster does his weightlifting and other workouts. The monster is tired of living in the lab; he wants out into the world. Frankenstein cuts off the bandages to show him why he can’t, and we see that the monster is really a monster from the neck up. Yeah, he’s a mess.The monster wanders out of the unlocked lab anyway and goes upstairs to the regular house and then down the street, where he peeps in the window at a young woman. She sees him and screams, so he breaks in and silences her. A bunch of people see him as he leaves.The police question the witnesses, and they're going to check the houses in the neighborhood. Frankenstein reads about the attack in the news, and he knows what happened. The monster promises to behave from now on. When the detectives stop by, Frankenstein lies to them.Margaret invites a jeweler over to shop for rings, and Frankenstein throws him out rudely. This results in another fight. She tells him that she knows what he’s been up to, and they make up.Not long after, Frankenstein tells his monster that he thinks they’re safe now. Except for Margaret, who could derail the monster getting a new face. She’s going to ruin

Apr 20, 202537 min

The Monkey, The Rule of Jenny Pen, Monolith, Deep in the Darkness, and Chillerama

We’ve got another cool selection of five films, old and new, this week. We’ll start off with two brand-new ones, “The Monkey” and “The Rule of Jenny Pen” (2025). “Monolith” was from 2022, and then 2014’s “Deep in the Darkness” and the sorta-classic “Chillerama” from 2011.The latest issue of “Horror Monthly” is now on sale! Check out all the back issues, as well as our other books, with one easy link: https://horrormonthly.comPick up our newest book, "The Horror Guys Guide to the Academy Awards of Horror" at https://www.horrormonthly.com/horror-guys-guides/academy-awards-of-horrorMainstream Films:2025 The Monkey* Directed by Osgood Perkins* Written by Osgood Perkins, Stephen King* Stars Theo James, Tatiana Maslany, Christian Convery* Run Time: 1 Hour, 38 Minutes* Trailer: Spoiler-Free Judgment ZoneLike the poster implies, there’s quite a body count in this one. And the deaths are over the top. It’s a good mix of dark humor and gruesome horror, very well made. We both really liked it.Spoilery SynopsisAfter the 1970s-era titles, we cut to a junk shop. Captain Petey Shelborn comes in with a monkey toy; he’s also covered in blood. He explains that it’s not a toy, but the proprietor doesn’t want it. Suddenly, the monkey starts banging his drum, and the captain looks around, terrified. We soon see that he has good reason to be afraid. The captain sees a flamethrower on the wall and burns the monkey. Credits roll.It’s 1999, and Hal and his twin brother Bill are annoying. Their deadbeat father was a pilot who walked out on the family. In the father’s closet, they find a box containing the monkey toy. Their father was Captain Petey from earlier, and this is the monkey he burned, only it looks untouched now. Bill turns the key on the monkey's back, but nothing happens.The babysitter takes the boys to a Japanese-style restaurant, and they take the monkey with them. The monkey activates, plays his drum, and inside, the chef accidentally beheads the babysitter. Bill and Hal’s mother talks about death, but she sounds almost eager for it.Hal gets bullied at school, and when he gets home, he finds the monkey in his room. He takes it to school with him. Hal tells the monkey that he wishes Bill was dead. Instead, their mother dies. The doctors said it was an aneurysm, but Hal knows better. The monkey doesn’t take requests.The boys go to live with Aunt Ida and Uncle Chip. Hal cuts up the monkey, which bleeds like a real monkey. He puts the pieces in the trash and the family moves to Maine.Bill finds the monkey, and Hal says he cut it up back at the other house. They both know it killed the babysitter. Bill wants to try it again, just to be sure. Soon, Uncle Chip is trampled by wild horses on a camping trip. The boys throw the monkey down into a well.Twenty-five years later, Aunt Ida hears the monkey’s song playing and goes down to the basement to investigate. She falls into a box of fishing lures and then sets herself on fire, but that’s… not the worst of it.Grown-up Hal now works in a store, and Dwayne, his boss, is half his age. He’s divorced from his wife, and her new husband, Ted, is a “family” expert. Hal’s son, little Petey, keeps asking about Hal. Ted wants to legally adopt Petey, and then Hal won’t be able to visit anymore.At Aunt Ida’s estate sale, Ricky, a young guy, buys the monkey; it reminds him of his dad. Ricky knows a guy who might want to buy the monkey.Petey wants to know about Hal’s family; he’s working on a family tree. Hal denies having any siblings. That night, he dreams about the monkey. Bill calls him on the phone to tell Hal about Aunt Ida’s death. Bill wants Hal to make sure the monkey isn’t in her house. As they discuss the monkey, a woman at the motel’s swimming pool explodes. Hal and Petey leave the motel in the middle of the night.Hal really doesn’t want Petey to be involved with any of this, but his son wants to see Hal’s childhood home. Barbara, the realtor, tells Petey about Bill, his uncle. Barbara recounts all the outrageous deaths from the past week in town. Every day since Ida, one person or more has died ridiculously. She doesn’t remember selling a toy monkey at the estate sale. Barbara becomes the next death when she meets a shotgun in a closet.As the police investigate the death, Ricky and a bunch of cheerleaders congregate outside. Hal tells Bill on the phone that there’s no monkey here, but that people have been dying mysteriously all over town.Hal opens up the 2024 phone book (those exist?) and looks for Bill inside, thinking he might be local. He finds “Mrs. Monkey” in there instead.We hear from Bill, who explains that he crawled back into the well for the monkey. It was gone, but there was a note saying it would be back. Years later, in 2016, the year of the monkey, he started seeing it everywhere. He became obsessed, even placing ads in the paper looking for his monkey. When Ricky brought him the monkey, he prayed to its infinite wisdom to smite the right person. It hasn’t yet.We c

Apr 13, 202541 min

Freaks (2019), Cube (1997), Cube (2021), The White Reindeer (1952), and The Seventh Seal (1957)

Some classics, some remakes, and some fun for you this week! We’ll start out with the super-powered “Freaks” from 2019. We’ll then watch the original “Cube” film from 1997 and then the Japanese remake from 2021. We’ll do the sequels another time. We’ll watch a couple of old classics next, “The White Reindeer” from 1952, as well as “The Seventh Seal” from 1957.The latest issue of “Horror Monthly” is now on sale! Check out all the back issues, as well as our other books, with one easy link: https://horrormonthly.comPick up our newest book, "The Horror Guys Guide to the Academy Awards of Horror" at https://www.horrormonthly.com/horror-guys-guides/academy-awards-of-horrorMainstream Films:2019 Freaks* Directed by Zach Lipovsky* Written by Zach Lipovsky* Stars Emile Hirsch, Bruce Dern, Grace Park* Run Time: 1 Hour, 45 Minutes* Trailer: Spoiler-Free Judgment ZoneThis leans heavily into science fiction, action, thriller aspects while whispering in some horror. It starts out nicely with a bit of mystery and gets more fascinating the more we find out what’s going on in this alternate reality. It was very entertaining with a big thumbs up from both of us.Spoilery SynopsisA little girl, Chloe, peeks out the window at the ice cream truck on the street. Her father shoos her away from the window and covers it back up, saying she’s not being a good hider, and the bad guys will find her if she’s not careful. She recites all the details about her made-up identity with her dad. She knows exactly what to do if her father ever doesn’t come home. “I can’t wait until I’m normal,” she whines. They seem happy, but they’re also clearly hiding. Is he some kind of loon?Then Dad’s eyes start to bleed, which surprises no one. She wonders if her eyes will do that someday. He shouts at her, “You are not normal!” and she laughs. Chloe knows things about “the mountain,” but she’s not supposed to know about that.Chloe dreams about a monster trying to break in the door, and we see that she’s been drawing scary pictures. Turns out, she sees ghosts. Dad says, “Ghosts aren’t real.”The next morning, Chloe hears the ice cream man outside again, and someone drops a book through the mail slot, “Mr. Snowcone and the Princess.” Chloe wants ice cream. She sees another little girl at the ice cream truck and wishes out loud repeating for Harper to bring her some. She does, so Chloe opens the door. Harper’s mother, Nancy, also stops by and introduces herself. “She looks so normal,” Nancy says. Dad wonders how Harper knows Chloe’s real name.Harper wakes up and finds Chloe in her room. This version of Harper is Chloe’s sister, at least Chloe thinks so. And wants Harper to pretend she’s Chloe’s mother. Dad comes in, and Chloe’s alone in the locked room. He offers to just buy her some ice cream since he has to go out for supplies anyway.A short time later, Dad rushes in, covered in blood and holding a gun. “That’s OK, this mostly isn’t my blood,” he says. “I just gotta be more careful.” Not only has he been shot, he’s forgotten the ice cream. He says they may have to stay hidden for a very long time.Once Dad passes out, Chloe grabs a gun and hundred-dollar bill and goes outside to get some ice cream. She looks around like she’s never been outside before. “Are we safe from the people who want to kill us?” She asks the ice cream man, who happens to know her name. He lures her into the back of his truck and drives her to “the park.” On the way, they pass a billboard showing someone who bleeds from the eyes and a warning to call 911.They do, in fact, actually go to the park. The old man asks if Chloe can do anything special. He tries to scare her, and then he tries to make her mad, to get a response. “Is there anything you can do that other people can’t do?” A police officer shows up, and the old man claims to be her grandfather. Chloe gets upset at the cop, and she makes him go away with the power of her mind.On the way home, the old man explains that Chloe’s mother was his daughter– he really is her grandfather, and he really does take her back home. He hands her a drug to make her father go to sleep the next time he returns.When he wakes up, Chloe’s father finds that his daughter has a new attitude; she calls him a liar. He says her mother was killed because she couldn’t follow the rules. A little later, Chloe finds her mother in the little room where she was with Harper earlier.We watch Chloe’s father dozing in front of a news report, “Remembering Dallas Ten Years After the Attack,” and they show the city in ruins. The “Abnormals” or “Freaks” are the subject of discussion. Any Freaks who are running loose are illegal. Most of the Freaks have been relocated to a mountain somewhere. “Living weapons of mass destruction,” calls the newscaster. But the agent being interviewed suggests how wonderful it could be to find an Abnormal child they could raise to be good and on their side.Chloe somehow ends up in Harper’s room while still at her own house during a sleepov

Apr 6, 202535 min

Presence, The Parenting, The Little Mermaid, Popeye the Slayer Man, and Popeye’s Revenge

Five newer films this week, including three takes on popular children’s cartoons that definitely aren’t for children! We’ll start off with the mysterious “Presence” and then the silly “The Parenting.” For our not-a-cartoon segment, we’ll take a dip with “The Little Mermaid” and then go sailing with “Popeye the Slayer Man” and “Popeye’s Revenge.”The latest issue of “Horror Monthly” is now on sale! Check out all the back issues, as well as our other books, with one easy link: https://horrormonthly.comPick up our newest book, "The Horror Guys Guide to the Academy Awards of Horror" at https://www.horrormonthly.com/horror-guys-guides/academy-awards-of-horrorGet all our reviews once a week: Mainstream Films:2025 Presence* Directed by Steven Soderbergh* Written by David Koepp* Stars Lucy Liu, Chris Sullivan, Callina Liang* Run Time: 1 Hour, 24 Minutes* Trailer: Spoiler-Free Judgment ZoneThis is filmed in an interesting way with lots of swooping around like we’re the POV from a ghost, and there are a low number of hard cuts - instead going with long continuous shots. The horror simmers in the background while family drama and bad people things are at the front. We both kind of liked it but didn’t love it.Spoilery SynopsisWe walk through a big, empty, dark house. Credits roll.In the daytime, a woman rushes in and gets ready for a meeting. She’s a Realtor, and she’s showing the house to Rebekah, Chris, Tyler, and Chloe. The house has just gone on the market.The painters arrive to work, but one of them refuses to go into one of the rooms. Soon, the family is all moved in. Not long after, we see that Rebekah may have done some shady business dealings, and she may face some repercussions. Chris worries about his own involvement in whatever she’s done; he’s thinking of separating from Rebekah.Chloe, on the other hand, is still grieving the death of her friend Nadia, who died suddenly. She soon senses someone in the room with her. The next day, the ghost picks up all her schoolbooks and puts them away for her. Chloe notices that right away.Chris and Rebekah talk about getting help for Chloe, who isn’t over Nadia’s death yet. Chris wants to get her a therapist, but Rebekah says it’ll just take time.Tyler brings Ryan home to meet Chloe, and the two are soon a couple. They talk about Nadia; he knew her too. It was bad drugs, Chloe thinks. She also thinks Nadia’s spirit is in the house with them. As soon they start to make out, the shelf in the closet breaks down, interrupting things.At dinner, Chloe asks the others about feeling a “presence” in the house. Tyler gets nasty with her, calling her an attention-seeker. Everyone argues. Chris mentions that Chloe knew both girls who died– there were two who died from the bad drugs.Even Chris thinks Tyler is being a jerk. When Tyler brags about posting a bad photo of a girl from school on the Internet, the ghost wrecks his bedroom, and they all see it. Chloe swears it’s Nadia.Chris calls in Carl and Lisa, a couple of psychics, who stop by on their lunch break. Lisa says “It’s suffering, just like you are, Chloe.” The presence is there for a reason, but Lisa can’t tell what that is. Tyler and Rebekah soon decide that Lisa’s a fake, but Chloe is all in on what she said.Ryan comes over and spikes Chloe’s drink as the ghost watches. The table starts to vibrate, and her drink falls on the floor. She invites him to stay over on the weekend while her parents will be away.Lisa comes back, and says she had a dream about a “window that doesn’t open” and that the ghost is there to prevent something bad from happening.Chris and Rebekah talk vaguely about their legal issues, but we still don’t know what the trouble is. They may talk to a lawyer while they’re on their trip. They leave.Ryan comes over and Tyler lets him in. He drugs Tyler and knocks him right out before preparing a similar drink for Chloe.Chloe decides she doesn’t want to go through with it with Ryan. “I’m not like… stable.” She tells him no, but then drinks her spiked OJ.As she passes out, he goes on and on about how she only gets what she wants, and she wants all this. Ryan basically admits killing Nadia and the other girl. He smothers her off-and-on with some plastic wrap. The ghost sees all this and tries to help– it goes downstairs and wakes up Tyler. He runs upstairs, tackles Ryan, and they both go out the upstairs bedroom window which seems to instantly kill them both.The house is empty again, the family is moving out. Rebekah looks in the old mirror and sees Tyler in there. “He came back to see me!” She cries and everyone is sad.Brian’s CommentaryWe get lots of long, lingering shots, apparently from the ghost’s point of view as it moves from room to room inside the house. It’s a pretty good house, and we spend the entirety of the film wandering around inside watching the humans inside. It’s like a depressing version of “The Sims.”It’s a believable yet dysfunctional family. It’s a very slow moving, talky film, with very lit

Mar 30, 202534 min

Crash!, Parasite, Meridian, City of Demons, and Metalstorm: The Destruction of Jared-Syn

We’ve got some classics and not-so-classics this week from Charles Band and Full Moon Entertainment. We’ll begin with 1976’s “Crash!”, follow that up with “Parasite” from 1982, and get crazy with “Metalstorm: The Destruction of Jared-Syn” from 1983. We’ll then fast-forward a bit and watch the very odd “Meridian: Kiss of the Beast” from 1990 and then the very recent “City of Demons” from 2025.The latest issue of “Horror Monthly” is now on sale! Check out all the back issues, as well as our other books, with one easy link: https://horrormonthly.comPick up our newest book, "The Horror Guys Guide to the Academy Awards of Horror" at https://www.horrormonthly.com/horror-guys-guides/academy-awards-of-horrorGet all our reviews once a week right here!Mainstream Films:1976 Crash!● Directed by Charles Band● Written by Marc Marais● Stars: Jose Ferrer, Sue Lyon, John Ericson● Run Time: 1 Hour, 28 Minutes● Trailer: Spoiler-Free Judgment ZoneThe awesome poster is the best thing about this one. If you’re into old-school practical effect car chases, crashes, and explosions, this one's for you. As far as horror movies go, it’s pretty tame. A somewhat disjointed tale of murder and revenge and collateral damage. It wasn’t a great film by any means, but we found it pretty entertaining.Spoilery SynopsisA couple in a van talk about almost arriving at their destination. A car comes up behind them and forces them off the road. It’s a Crash! The van explodes in a huge fireball, and we see a body fly through the air.Sometime later, we watch Kim walking through an outdoor flea market at a drive-in. She buys an ugly little figurine from a creepy man at the swap meet.We cut to Kim’s husband, Marc Denne, watching old movies of them playing tennis. Marc is now confined to a wheelchair, and he’s not happy about it. He doesn’t want her to ever leave the house again.We cut to a man in a car who encounters the black convertible that caused the crash earlier. He also crashes and explodes!Kim uses the little figurine on her car key chain and then goes for a drive. Suddenly, a Doberman dog jumps in the back of her convertible and causes her to crash, this time without the explosion.We cut to Kim in the hospital, covered from head to toe in bandages. She’s all cut up and has dog bites as well. She’s in shock and won’t release that little figurine. We cut to Marc, who actually trained the dog to attack and kill his own wife.There’s an APB out for the black convertible hit-and-run car, and as the policeman chases the car, he sees no one driving it at all. It makes the police car crash and then drives off.Dr. Martin and Lt. Pegler don’t know who she is or what really happened to her. She wasn’t found anywhere near a car accident, so someone dumped her in the desert. Marc watches a “Do You Know This Woman” announcement on TV, so he knows she’s still alive. “With no memory she’s as good as dead, but what if she remembers?” He asks the dog.Marc goes to the hospital where Kim is staying and sneaks into her room. He pulls out her breathing tube and IV and then leaves. Shortly after, Nurse Kathy finds her dying but hooks her back up; she and Dr. Martin know someone tried to kill Kim.The driverless ghost car is surrounded now by three police cars, and it’s a crazy chase. All three police cars meet a violent end as the ghost car drives on.Dr. Martin sketches the figure that Kim won’t release and talks to a guy at the university. The little statue is a Kaza, and it’s really old. The occult character it represents is dedicated to revenge and violence. Meanwhile, Kim wakes up with bright red eyes, and she telepathically moves the wheelchair in her room.Dr. Greg Martin and Nurse Kathy talk to Kim, who has woken up but doesn’t remember anything. Meanwhile, the ghost car kills a few more police cars and tourists. Lt. Pegler is surprised that Kim has recovered so quickly; she’s going home to live with Nurse Kathy. Greg takes the Kaza figure to a specialist, who turns out to be… Marc. Marc knows all about the Kaza,That night, Marc’s electric wheelchair attacks Marc’s dog, and Kim seems to be behind it telepathically. The dog is killed. Kathy sees that Kim’s eyes have turned bright red. Marc knows that the Kaza was behind the attack.Marc calls Kim and wants to meet, but she still doesn’t recognize him. They get together and go back to his house, and she doesn’t remember that, either. He calls her Kim, and she doesn’t pick up on that, either. He admits everything and then locks her in the sauna before cranking it up to eleven.Lt. Pegler and Greg watch as a black convertible is towed in. The keys fit, so it’s absolutely Kim’s car, so now they know who she is. When Greg hears that she’s Mrs. Demme, he runs off.At the police impound yard, the car springs to life and escapes as Kim controls it mentally from inside the sauna. As Kim's memory returns, we get a hazy “greatest crashes” montage; she remembers all the car crashes now. (I think we see edited versions of all the

Mar 23, 202548 min

Heart Eyes, Byzantium, Inhuman Kiss, Corpse Bride, and The Dead Thing

This week, we’ve got five good ones for you! We’ll start out with the new “Heart Eyes” from 2025, then we’ll look at 2012’s “Byzantium,” and then 2024’s “Inhuman Kiss.” We’ll also take a look at “The Corpse Bride” from 2005 and “The Dead Thing,” also from 2024.And, of course, we have more excellent short films for you!The latest issue of “Horror Monthly” is now on sale! Check out all the back issues, as well as our other books, with one easy link: https://horrormonthly.comPick up our newest book, "The Horror Guys Guide to the Academy Awards of Horror" at https://www.horrormonthly.com/horror-guys-guides/academy-awards-of-horrorGet all our reviews once a week: https://www.horrorweekly.comMainstream Films:2025 Heart Eyes* Directed by Josh Ruben* Written by Phillip Murphy, Christopher Landon, Michael Kennedy* Stars Mason Gooding, Olivia Holt, Gigi Zumbado* Run Time: 1 Hour, 37 Minutes* Trailer: Spoiler-Free Judgment ZoneThis was way less serious than either of us expected. It’s got a serious body count and gore, but leans heavy into humor and romance too. Very much a mash up between a slasher horror and a rom-com. We found it entertaining.Spoilery SynopsisPatrick and Adeline are going to have the best Valentine’s day ever. He botches the proposal when she bites into the ring by accident. As they kiss, his phone interrupts. It’s Nico, the photographer, who’s messed up the “candid” photos. Someone kills Nico before he can try again. Then Patrick gets an arrow shot through his forehead. Adeline runs through the vineyard, and it’s nowhere near as romantic as it was a minute ago. As the killer closes in on her, a security guard tries to stop things, but he dies quickly. Adeline, on the other hand, learns what it’s like to ride through a giant wine press. We see the killer in his mask, which has hearts for eyes. Credits roll.The news calls him “HEK” the “Heart Eyes Killer.” He’s struck several times on the past few Valentine’s Days.We cut to Ally and Monica talking about the holiday. Ally is impressed to find she has exactly the same coffee order as Jay Simmonds, who is clearly on the path to be her new boyfriend until she accidentally gives him a bloody nose and runs away.Crystal Cane talks to the board; she didn’t realize there was a Valentine’s Day killer out there, so Ally’s ad campaign is just terribly timed. She’s made an ad of various lovers dying violently, which is not the look Crystal was going for. She calls in Ally’s replacement, which turns out to be Jay Simmonds.Detectives find a wedding band at the scene of the pre-credit murders, and it says “J.S.” They know it was HEK, and there are going to be more deaths.Jay and Ally talk. Monica and Ally talk. Ally goes on a date with Jay, and the bouncer at the expensive French restaurant runs a metal detector over her. Ally goes on and on about how she’s the least romantic person ever. She really hates Jay, but kisses him when she spots Collin, her ex, who is out with a date of his own. We see through the killer’s mask as he watches all four people.Ally gets locked out of her building, so Jay smashes a window and cuts his hand. Suddenly the duo is attacked by HEK, who’s been hiding in her closet. The killer then chases them into a closed botanical garden, and they all play hide and seek. As soon as the police show up, the killer disappears.Jay is arrested as the HEK murderer. He’s not happy because Ally ditched him in the chase. They found the mask and the murder weapon. The ring they found earlier has his initials on it as well. Meanwhile, Ally tries to have Jay released since it couldn’t have been him. The detective points out that Jay was in the same towns as all the other HEK murders.Suddenly, the lights go out at the police station and the real killer strikes again. We see that his heart eyes light up, and he’s got night vision. Soon, they’re all outta cops. Ally finds a gun and shoots the killer about a hundred times, missing HEK with every single shot. Still, Ally and Jay get out of the police station and make their way to a busy drive-in theater.No one gives the masked killer a second look as he walks through the place stabbing people right and left. As they hide, Jay and Ally make up and bond a bit.When the killer resurfaces, Ally wants to work with Jay as a team to defeat HEK. They knock him over the head and impale him with a machete. He’s gotta be dead now. Then Ally pukes all over the killer’s body. They pull the killer’s mask off and see that it’s– no one that they recognize.After the police clean up everything, Jay gets a ride home with the surviving detective, and Ally’s left all alone. Monica calls and gives Ally a pep talk. Ally then rushes to the airport to catch Jay before he boards his flight out of town.Out of nowhere, Ally gets a call from HEK, and he’s got Jay as a hostage. She goes to the old building and finds both Jay and the killer there. The killer removes his mask, and it’s David, the IT guy from the police station. He’s working wit

Mar 16, 202533 min

Drained, Little Bites, From Dusk Till Dawn, Shadow of the Vampire, and Only Lovers Left Alive

It’s vampire week (because… why not?)! We’ll start off with 2024’s “Drained” and “Little Bites.” We’ll watch a few more older films, “From Dusk Till Dawn” (1996) and “Shadow of the Vampire” (2000). Lately, we’ll watch the very weird “Only Lovers Left Alive” from 2013.And, of course, we have more excellent short films for you!The latest issue of “Horror Monthly” is now on sale! Check out all the back issues, as well as our other books, with one easy link: https://horrormonthly.comPick up our newest book, "The Horror Guys Guide to the Academy Awards of Horror" at https://www.horrormonthly.com/horror-guys-guides/academy-awards-of-horrorGet all our reviews once a week: https://www.horrorweekly.comMainstream Films:2024 Drained* Directed by Peter Stylianou, Sean Cronin* Written by Peter Stylianou* Stars Ruaridh Aldington, Madalina Bellariu Ion, Craig Conway* Run Time: 1 Hour, 47 Minutes* Trailer: Spoiler-Free Judgment ZoneThis was a pretty novel take on vampires and love, dependency and addiction. The casting is perfect, the script is well written, and all the technical aspects are top notch. Horrorguy Brian liked it some, Horrorguy Kevin liked it a lot.Spoilery SynopsisWe see a man lying in a hospital bed with a vampire sucking on his arm. “Love is forever,” she says. Credits roll.Thomas is a struggling artist who lives with his mother. She’s dating John, a pest control man. Thomas is depressed, so he goes to a dance club. There, he spots a woman who looks like the one he’s been drawing repeatedly. He’s enthralled, and so is she. She’s Rhea. Two weeks later, Thomas is still thinking about Rhea. She doesn’t have social media.John announces at dinner that he’s moving in with Thomas and his mum. They’re kicking Thomas out. “I’m an artist, Mum!” “No, you’re lazy!” Even before he gets moved in, there are bills to pay, but Thomas doesn’t have a job.Thomas gets a call from Dana, his bartender friend; Rhea has returned. When he arrives, he finds her with another man. She catches up with Thomas a bit later, alone. They go to his place, and he invites her in.She gets right down to business for sexy time, which surprises Thomas, who hasn’t done this much. By the time he gets to bed, she just wants to sleep. Thomas wakes up later to find Rhea biting his arm and sucking on the blood. She has fangs– vampire! “You taste amazing!” He hides in the bathroom, but she leaves him her home phone number. The bite marks on his arm heal very quickly.In the morning, Thomas is wary of sunlight, but he’s fine; it doesn’t hurt him. That night, she comes back, and he lets her in again. This time, he lets her suck his blood, and he likes it too, now. In the morning, she gets exposed to sunlight and screams; he freaks out, but she was just playing with him. Sunlight doesn’t bother her much.He asks her how she became a vampire, and she says, “You have to eat one’s heart. It was a long time ago.”Thomas starts having pretty serious money problems. His phone has no credits and the power is off. Rhea comes back again, “When the full moon comes, I won’t be able to control it.” They have more good times together.Every day, Rhea has to go home to tend to her boyfriend, who is not well. He invites her to live with him, and she agrees. They go see Andreas, the man we saw her feeding from in the opening scene; he’s dying. He has no regrets. He’s dying of old age… at 32.Thomas and Rhea visit Mum and John. They comment on how much weight Thomas has lost. Rhea doesn’t eat. Thomas gets a nosebleed, and Rhea licks the blood off his fingers, which Thomas’s parents think is… odd.One night, Thomas sees Rhea having some kind of seizure; she knows Andreas has died. She was visiting him and his heart stopped halfway through feeding her.Thomas is exhausted, but Rhea is hungry. He realizes that she’s slowly sucking the life out of him. She goes out for dinner. At the bar, he sees her with another guy, which results in a fight.Thomas passes out and goes to the hospital. His mother says there’s something not right about Rhea, and then they take him home.It’s the night of the full moon, and as Rhea screams in pain, so does Thomas, across town. John gets tired of having Thomas in the house, and they argue. John decides to go back to his apartment, which is where Rhea’s been staying. When John goes inside, Rhea eats him.Thomas goes over to the flat, as he’s worried about John. Rhea apologizes for killing John, but she’s still hungry. She grabs Thomas and flies away, but she ends up dropping him on a rooftop.He runs home and tells his mother that Rhea’s a vampire, but she thinks he’s on drugs. Rhea has mind control powers over Thomas, so he cannot help when Rhea kills his mother.Thomas is arrested for killing John and his mother. He swears Rhea the vampire girl did it, and they think he’s going for an insanity defense.Thomas is sent to an asylum where he meets a patient who also has bites. “They’re everywhere,” the man laughs. Thomas continues to have dreams and nightmares

Mar 9, 202544 min

Companion, Amulet, Beneath, The Vampire, and Chernobyl Diaries

A completely random mix of oldies and newies this time around. We’ll start with the new “Companion” from 2025, then “Amulet” from 2020. “Beneath” (2013) is next, followed by “Chernobyl Diaries” from the previous year. Lastly, we’ll look at a nearly forgotten classic that’s way better than we expected: “El Vampiro” from 1957.And, of course, we have more excellent short films for you!The latest issue of “Horror Monthly” is now on sale! Check out all the back issues, as well as our other books, with one easy link: https://horrormonthly.comPick up our newest book, "The Horror Guys Guide to the Academy Awards of Horror" at https://www.horrormonthly.com/horror-guys-guides/academy-awards-of-horrorGet all our reviews once a week: https://www.horrorweekly.comMainstream Films:2025 Companion* Directed by Drew Hancock* Written by Drew Hancock* Stars Sophie Thatcher, Jack Quaid, Lukas Gage* Run Time: 1 Hour, 37 Minutes* Trailer: Spoiler-Free Judgment ZoneThe trailer gives too much away on this. Avoid it ahead of time if you can. Though we saw the trailer and still enjoyed it, it's not the end of the world. It’s enjoyable, low-key science fiction and horror in one, with a good script, strong cast, and excellent effects.Spoilery SynopsisWe open on Iris shopping at the grocery store, where she sees Josh, and they talk. They become a couple and take a road trip to a mansion in the country to meet up with his friends. He was expecting a rustic cabin, and this place is excessive.We meet Eli, Patrick, Kat, and Sergey, who owns the whole place. Iris is nervous around all the strangers; she has to force a smile through the conversation.Iris and Kat talk about Sergey, and Kat says he’s married; she's just sort of an accessory or toy for the rich man. She says Iris makes her “feel replaceable.” Later, when everyone dances, Iris monopolizes Josh; later, they have what appears to be painful sex. She tells him how perfect this trip has been. “I just want you to be happy, Josh.”Iris goes to the lake where Sergey is relaxing. He hits on Iris, which makes her uncomfortable. He starts kissing her, “I know what you’re for.” She comes back to the house, covered in Sergey’s blood, and everybody sees it. She explains exactly what happened by the lake.Josh commands, “Iris, go to sleep.” Yes, Iris is a robot. The group ties her to a chair. “I thought they had safeguards against this,” asks Eli. Josh wakes Iris up; she doesn’t even know what she is. “You’re an emotional support robot that f***s,” he explains. Eli calls the police.We flash back to Josh getting the delivery and signing the user agreement. The delivery man explains how to set up “Iris.” The whole grocery store thing was just an implanted memory.Back in the present, Iris is… upset at learning the truth. Kat comes in and argues with Josh. Meanwhile, Iris finds her knife and gets loose, stealing Josh’s phone in the process.Later, Josh explains that he “modded” Iris to change her programming. “Did you jailbreak your sexbot?” Yeah, he disabled her safety protocols, which is a crime. Josh and Kat were working together to “use” Iris to kill Sergey. Kat opens Sergey’s safe, with twelve million dollars inside.In a safe place, Iris accesses her control interface on Josh’s phone. She plays with her voice and eye color. Her intelligence is only set to 40%, so she cranks that all the way up.We soon see that Patrick is Eli’s sexbot. Patrick admits he knows what he really is, he pieced it together. The two soon find Iris out in the woods. Iris and Eli wrestle, and she shoots Eli with his own gun. Iris then steals Josh’s car to go home. Josh reports the car stolen, which sets off the “kill switch” on the car’s AI, shutting it down not far away.Josh runs his “mod” on Patrick and turns his “Aggression” up to 100% and resets him to be Patrick’s lover/master.Iris gets pulled over by the police, and she changes her language to German to confuse the officer. The deputy realizes that she’s coming from Sergey’s house. He sees the knife and the blood and draws his gun. Then Patrick shows up and beats the cop to a pulpy mess before turning Iris off.Patrick drives Iris home in the police car, with most of the deputy in the trunk. Kat decides it’s time to take her share of the cash and leave. Josh tells Patrick to “stop her,” but Patrick is still 100% aggressive, so he’s lethal.Josh is on his own now with Patrick. They work to dispose of bodies and clean up the mess. He decides to wake up iris. They argue about his worth and hers. He turns her intelligence all the way down and then tortures her by setting her hand on fire.The robotics company called; they’re thirty minutes away. Josh orders Iris to shoot herself. She puts the gun to her head and pulls the trigger.Josh explains what happened to the man from the robotics company; he has a story. Patrick, dressed as a policeman, corroborates Josh’s story. They plan to download her SSD and check out the footage, which is news to Josh. Her brain wasn’t even actua

Mar 2, 202542 min

The Gorge, The Damned, Grafted, Slugs, and The Night Strangler

more excellent short films for you!The latest issue of “Horror Monthly” is now on sale! Check out all the back issues, as well as our other books, with one easy link: https://horrormonthly.comPick up our newest book, "The Horror Guys Guide to the Academy Awards of Horror" at https://www.horrormonthly.com/horror-guys-guides/academy-awards-of-horrorGet all our reviews once a week: https://www.horrorweekly.comMainstream Films:2025 The Gorge* Directed by Scott Derrickson* Written by Zach Dean* Stars Miles Teller, Anya Taylor-Joy, Sigourney Weaver* Run Time: 2 Hours, 7 Minutes* Trailer: Spoiler-Free Judgment ZoneThis was better than we expected and more than we expected. The preview was done right, giving just a little taste of the movie, and it was good going into it blind. It wasn’t a perfect film, but we both enjoyed it.Spoilery SynopsisWe open on Drasa, sleeping in a cave. She marks another day off her calendar as she points her sniper rifle out toward a far distant airport. One shot, and her victim falls down dead. Credits roll.We cut to Levi, getting up and driving to the beach as the sun rises. He’s told to report to the military base, where he meets Bartholemew, who’s a high-up spy. She talks about his history as a Marine Corps sniper. He’s got quite a list of kills. She’s got a job for him.Meanwhile, in Lithuania, Drasa and her father visit a graveyard. They talk about her latest kill, an arms dealer who totally had it coming. The old man is dying, and she’s going away for at least a year, so they say their goodbyes.Levi parachutes down over the no-fly zone and has to walk miles to his very isolated destination, an extremely deep gorge. He meets J.D., a soldier who briefs Levi. Neither of them has any idea what country this is. J.D. hasn’t seen a single person during the past year, and Levi will be his replacement.Levi tours the observation tower where he’ll be spending the next year. There’s another tower on the other side, but Levi isn’t allowed to make contact with them. There’s a lot of technology and air raid sirens. It’s all very secret. Russians and Americans have been working together on this for decades without their own leaders knowing about this place. It’s even cloaked electronically from satellites.Levi needs to stop what’s in the gorge from coming out. They hear “The hollow men” down below screaming. Those things are extremely lethal.“The gorge is the door to Hell and we’re standing guard at the gate,” J.D. hypothesizes before leaving Levi on his own. The helicopter then comes to pick up J.D., and the man on board shoots him.Levi walks the wall of the gorge, and there are some very heavy weapons and mines and barriers installed there. We see that Drasa is now working in the tower on the other side. A couple months in, she holds up a sign wanting to know his name. They both know they aren’t allowed to communicate, but they do it anyway. They soon learn that they are both master snipers. They make a lot of noise, enough to wake up whatever’s down below.They see the things crawling up the walls, and they both shoot the horde. Between the machine guns and the explosives in the walls, they get most of the plant-covered creatures. Drasa gets splattered in the shoulder with molten metal from one of the mines. But like all hits and bangs and draggings and wounds in this movie, it’s not too big of a deal.In the morning, they have to clean up and replace the mines. Something like a rocket or drone comes up out of the gorge and flies away.As the months pass, they continue to communicate by holding up signs to each other. Levi assembles a zipline by shooting the other side with a rocket. As Levi crosses, he hears the creatures way down in the foggy gorge. They have a nice evening together. They talk about their assassinations over their careers.On the way back across the zipline, one of the creatures sets off a mine, and the cable snaps. He pops his parachute and goes down. Drasa jumps into the gorge with a parachute after him as well.Levi finds himself being attacked by a giant caterpillar and then he’s attacked by hungry tree roots. Suddenly, they’re attacked by more of those plant-creatures, but this time, they’re on plant-horses. These aren’t demons, they’re the men who were sent into the gorge in the 1940s, infected with some kind of plant plague.They walk through the landscape, and there are skeletons and bones everywhere. Then they find a long-abandoned town and they stop in to hide in an old church. There are many bodies inside, at least some are apparently suicides. They’re attacked by a horde of skull-spiders and then more humanoid creatures, and it’s all very action-packed and intense (how much ammo could they be carrying?).They leave the church and get into an old WWII-era lab. They turn on the generator and the lights come right on. They find a movie reel and watch it. The scientist on the film says it’s 1946, and the Allies have been working on biochemical missiles, but then an earthquak

Feb 23, 202542 min

Wolf Man, The Boys from County Hell, Funny Man, Dracula’s Dog, and The Night Stalker

We’ve got a fun selection of werewolves and vampires this week, starting off with 2025’s “Wolf Man.” We’ll stop by for a visit with “The Boys from County Hell” (2020) and see a “Funny Man” (1994). We’ll then pick on the crazy “Dracula’s Dog” aka “Zoltan: Hound of Dracula” (1977) and then finish up with “The Night Stalker” from way back in 1972. And, of course, we have more excellent short films for you!The latest issue of “Horror Monthly” is now on sale! Check out all the back issues, as well as our other books, with one easy link: https://horrormonthly.comPick up our newest book, "The Horror Guys Guide to the Academy Awards of Horror" at https://www.horrormonthly.com/horror-guys-guides/academy-awards-of-horrorGet all our reviews once a week: https://www.horrorweekly.comMainstream Films:2025 Wolf Man* Directed by Leigh Whannell* Written by Leigh Whannell, Corbett Tuck* Stars Christopher Abbott, Julia Garner, Matilda Firth* Run Time: 1 Hour, 43 Minutes* Trailer: Spoiler-Free Judgment ZoneThis has a pretty minimal set up at the beginning and then gets right to things abruptly. Then it doesn’t let up. Overall, we both liked it. It was similar enough to other werewolf movies to be comforting and familiar, yet different enough to be interesting.Spoilery SynopsisWe’re told that in 1995, a hiker went missing in the mountains of Oregon. Several members of the community speculated that the man had contracted an animal-borne virus they called “Hills Fever.” The indigenous people there called it “The Face of the Wolf.”Grady, a father, and young son, Blake, go out hunting in the mountains. The man warns his son about not eating the mushrooms. When they spot a deer, Blake runs off alone to track it. He sees something scary, but his father is even scarier. They hear something roaring out in the trees and hide in a deer blind. It’s all very tense, but the creature eventually leaves. Blake and his father go home, and Grady calls a friend on the radio. “I saw it. The face of the wolf. It’s real.”Thirty years later, we see grown-up Blake and his daughter Ginger, in the big city. Wife Charlotte comes in with Blake’s father’s legal paperwork in the mail: he has inherited Grady’s estate after Grady has finally been officially declared deceased. Blake hadn’t spoken to his scary father in years, and he regrets that now. Blake and Charlotte are having some marital issues, and he wants to work harder to work that out. He suggests the family go to Oregon and spend the summer on the family farm. On the way getting turned around, they meet Derek, someone he knew when he was really young. Right off the bat, Derek warns them not to be out after dark. Charlotte doesn’t like Derek because he has a gun (he was out hunting). Derek warns them that it takes a special “type” to live out here, with the animals and diseases and stuff. Derek rides along to guide them to Blake’s dad’s farm. As they talk, they almost hit someone in the road and crash the truck they’re driving. The truck comes to rest stuck in a tree on its side, and it’s also very tense, even more so when a strange animal comes out of the woods, scratches Blake, and drags away Derek’s unconscious body after ripping his belly open. The three run to Grady’s farmhouse as something growls behind them. They barely get inside before it comes pounding on the door. “It sounded like an animal, but it was standing up on two feet, like a person,” Blake tells Charlotte as he barricades the door. Blake spits out a tooth, thinking he hit his face on the steering wheel in the accident. Charlotte notices that his arm has a big scratch on it, like from an animal. The city-slicker family is not coping well with life in the mountains. As his family sleeps, Blake notices his hearing has gotten a lot better. A lot. It’s overwhelming. The creature is still pacing around outside the house and reaches through the doggy door to grab Blake’s leg, but Charlotte drives it away. He passes out, and Charlotte tries to use the CB to call for help. Blake wakes up, and he’s not looking so good. He talks in growls, and his face is a little off. His hair starts falling out and he starts getting worse very quickly. He can’t understand her words, and everything starts looking different to him visually; his senses are going crazy. He starts chewing on his own wounded arm, and Charlotte comes to the conclusion that’s just not right. Charlotte sees Grady’s old truck parked outside, and she takes everyone outside to try to get it started. She’s smart enough to take a spare battery to jump-start the old truck, and when she does, they get a good look at what is clearly a Wolf Man. The three run and hide on the roof of the plastic-sheeted greenhouse, and we know where this scene is going to play out right away. Blake runs away as a diversion so that Charlotte and Ginger can run back to the house. When they let Blake into the house a bit later, he’s clearly gotten worse– he’s lost more hair and his teeth have grown longer.Exce

Feb 16, 202543 min

Horns, Rec 4, Night of the Devils, Bigfoot: The Lost Coast Tapes, and Abraham Lincoln Vampire Hunter

A collection of not-so-recent films this time around. We’ll start with the very weird “Horns” from 2013 and then watch an old Italian film, “Night of the Devils” from 1972. “Rec 4: Apocalypse” wrapped up the series, at least so far, and we’ll talk about how that finished. We’ll tag along with some unfortunate Bigfoot hunters in 2012’s “Bigfoot: The Lost Coast Tapes” and then finish up with the fact-based documentary “Abraham Lincoln: Vampire Hunter” from 2012.And, of course, we have more excellent short films for you!The latest issue of “Horror Monthly” is now on sale! Check out all the back issues, as well as our other books, with one easy link: https://horrormonthly.comPick up our newest book, "The Horror Guys Guide to the Academy Awards of Horror" at https://www.horrormonthly.com/horror-guys-guides/academy-awards-of-horrorGet all our reviews once a week: https://www.horrorweekly.comMainstream Films:2013 Horns* Directed by Alexandre Aja* Written by Keith Bunin, Joe Hill* Stars Daniel Radcliffe, Juno Temple, Max Minghella* Run Time: 2 Hours. * Trailer: Spoiler-Free Judgment ZoneThere’s a murder mystery, and a guy with the abilities to solve it. This one is a lot of fun, with dark humor, action, and romance. We never find out why these things are happening to Ig, the main guy, but it doesn’t really matter. Just go with it.Spoilery SynopsisIg Parrish narrates about how in love he was with Merrin Williams. We cut to him waking up on the kitchen floor after drinking too much. He’s got an amazing record collection, and he thinks of her. There are dozens of reporters outside with protestors, “You will burn in Hell!” and other signs. He’s accused of killing Merrin. He drives to his parents’ house, and the reporters follow him. Parents Derrick and Lydia are there, along with his brother Terry. They talk about Lee Tourneau, Ig’s lawyer. He still denies having anything to do with her death. Lee shows up; the lab that was processing the evidence for the case has burned down mysteriously. Ig goes to the local bar and talks to Glenna, who clearly likes him. That night, there’s a candlelight vigil for Merrin. Dale, Merrin’s father, thanks them all for coming. He blames Ig for the murder, too. Ig gets drunk, smashes the shrine, and pees on it. He later complains that everyone in town, when they saw him, saw the face of the devil. As Ig wakes up the next day next to Glenna, he’s got some bloody bumps on his forehead. Even as he looks in the mirror, the horns grow longer, and yes, Glenna can see them too. She starts acting weird, and then she starts eating all the donuts– strangely.He goes to the doctor about the horns. There’s a woman there who wants to kick her own screaming child, or maybe abandon her. She wants to leave her husband. She tells him all her secret immoral desires. The receptionist just wants to scream at the mother, and he gives her permission. It seems that everyone wants Ig’s permission to do bad things, and they confess bad acts and bad thoughts. The nurse also overshares. The doctor mentions that every time he looks away from the horns, he forgets that they’re there. The doctor sedates Ig before cutting off the horns, and Ig dreams of his childhood with his friends and how he met Merrin. Ig does a crazy, risky stunt– he rides down a log trough in a shopping cart and nearly dies. Lee, however, ends up losing several fingers in the process of the chain of events. Young Ig shows Merrin to his treehouse in the woods, and they’re followed by Terry. Years pass, and they’re still together. Ig wakes up at the doctor’s office, and he’s still got his horns. The doctor and the nurse both got distracted by sex in the middle of the operation. Ig drives to the church to ask the priest what to do. The priest says he’d really like to just string Ig up and kill him. Ig goes to see Lee, but Lee doesn’t see the horns. “Maybe the horns don’t work on good people,” Ig wonders. He goes home to his mother, who sees the horns and wishes he’d gone somewhere else with his problems. She’s really tired of him making her feel bad. People just can’t help but to tell him the absolute truth. His father never doubted for a minute that Ig murdered Merrin; he had the lab burned down. Ig decides that maybe he can use his newfound “truth powers” to make the real killer confess. When the reporters get too close, he finds that he can do some pretty good “suggestions” as well. He goes to the bar and demands that anyone who knows anything about Merrin’s murder to speak up. He gets some random confessions and one guy who wants to expose his penis to the world. The bartender rants that he wants out and sets his own place on fire. We flash back to Ig buying a ring and going out with Merrin to a diner. Lee and Terry wonder if he’s not rushing into things. Merrin, on the other hand, says she’s moving to Los Angeles and they need to break up. She says she might be in love with someone else. They argue and split up just as Terry arrives. The next mo

Feb 9, 202539 min

Nosferatu, Rec 2, Rec 3, Bride of Chucky, and Hellraiser VIII Hellworld

Nosferatu finally came to streaming this week, so we’ve got the full synopsis for you, although we’ve already told you our first thoughts in previous episodes of the podcast. We watched the original “Rec” (2007) nearly two years ago, but this week, we watched the sequels, “Rec 2” (2009) and “Rec 3” (2012). Continuing the mini-theme of sequels, we then watched “Bride of Chucky” (1998) and “Hellraiser VIII: Hellworld” (2005).And, of course, we have more excellent short films for you!The latest issue of “Horror Monthly” is now on sale! Check out all the back issues, as well as our other books, with one easy link: https://horrormonthly.comMainstream Films:2024 Nosferatu· Directed by Robert Eggers· Written by Robert Eggers, Henrik Galeen, Bram Stoker· Stars Lily-Rose Depp, Nicholas Hoult, Bill Skarsgard· Run Time: 2 Hours, 12 Minutes· Trailer:Spoiler-Free Judgment ZoneIt’s a remake of a silent classic that was hit-and-miss for us. We saw it at the theater and are reviewing from a second viewing at home. It’s visually impressive, and the cast does a fine job. The story and script didn’t give us enough of anything new. We thought the beginning was strong, a bit dull for a long stretch, and then a strong finish.Spoilery SynopsisEllen sits up and prays, “Come to me. Hear my call.” Something hears her. “You wakened me from an eternity of darkness. You are not for the living. You are not for humankind,” it says. She walks outside, and she swears to love him. Then she has a weird seizure/orgasm as credits roll.Years later, in 1838 Germany, Ellen talks to Thomas; they are newlyweds. She’s dreamt about “him” again. He’s a workaholic, and he really wants a promotion at the real estate firm. Mr. Knock has a special job set up for him; he’s been dealing with a foreign count who wants to buy a house here in town. The old count asked to buy an old ruin, and he’s paying top dollar. The catch is that Thomas needs to go to Transylvania to get the count to sign the paperwork. The money is good and a promotion is hinted at, so Thomas really has no choice. Count Orlok will be waiting for Thomas’s arrival.Ellen is moody and needy and weird, and she doesn’t want Thomas to leave so soon after the wedding. She’s had a weird dream wherein she married Death and was happy about it. He tells her never to talk about these things, as people will think she’s mad. “It portends something awful for both of us.”Thomas’s wealthy shipping friend Harding congratulates Thomas on his new position. He brags that he has three children - two little girls and a boy on the way, and he’ll be taking care of Ellen while Thomas is away. She suffers from “melancholy.” We cut to Mr. Knock, who is doing some kind of demonic ritual; he’s clearly both insane and working dark magic.It’s a long way to Transylvania, and the local gypsies confuse Thomas. They don’t even want to hear Orlok’s name. He stays in the inn overnight, and everyone there is weird. An old woman warns Thomas to avoid Orlok’s shadow; it has a mind of its own.That night, Thomas snoops and watches the locals go to a vampire’s grave and drive a stake into its heart. In the morning, the entire village has cleared out and taken his horse with them– he has to walk the rest of the way to the castle. At midnight, he encounters a silent black carriage that takes him the rest of the way there.The count is odd, and Thomas is afraid of him from the very beginning. He wants to get right down to business and sign the paperwork. He’s a slow, wheezy old man, but he moves suspiciously fast at times. He tells the count about what he saw last night, and the count gets annoyed. When he accidentally cuts himself, Orlok gets excited, and Thomas gets really frightened.We cut to Helen talking to Anna, and she’s all morbid. “I’m not mad, Anna. My heart is lost without Thomas.”Thomas wakes up in the morning, and the castle is deserted. Thomas explores and finds that he’s got a bite on his chest. Rats, maybe? That night as the two men finish signing the paperwork, Orlok wants to see a photo of Thomas’s wife and sniffs it all over.Thomas finds another bite on his chest and runs through the castle. The Count has refused to let him leave, but now he finds himself alone in the huge old place. Eventually, he finds a cellar with a big tomb inside. He finds Orlok inside, but the count looks dead. Thomas raises a pick above his head and tries to impale the count, who wakes up and sics his wolves on Thomas. We soon see the count sucking the blood out of Thomas’s chest. Thomas wakes up and jumps out the window, falling into the river below.Orlok sniffs the locket again and commands Ellen to dream only of him. She gets so upset that Harding calls in Dr. Sievers to treat her; he says she has too much blood and that Harding should tie her to the bed. Harding warns Ellen that Thomas has gone missing, and Mr. Knock has vanished as well. Harding is getting tired of Ellen’s whininess and morbidity.At Dr. Siever’s asylum, a new patient comes

Feb 2, 202541 min

The Soul Eater, Ghostbusters Frozen Empire, Frankie Freako, The Stranglers of Bombay, and Godzilla vs. Hedorah

We have an interesting collection this week! We’ll start off with the fairly recent “The Soul Eater” and “Frankie Freako.” We actually forgot that there was a new Ghostbusters movie last year, so we picked that one up as well. Then we’ll look at a couple of oldies, “The Stranglers of Bombay” from Hammer films and “Godzilla vs. Hedorah” (aka “The Smog Monster”).And, of course, we have more excellent short films for you!The latest issue of “Horror Monthly” is now on sale! Check out all the back issues, as well as our other books, with one easy link: https://horrormonthly.comGet all our reviews once a week: https://www.horrorweekly.comMainstream Films:2024 The Soul Eater· Directed by Alexandre Bustillo, Julien Maury· Written by Annelyse Batrel, Ludovic Lefebvre, Alexis Laipsket· Stars Virginie Ledoyan, Paul Hamy, Sandrine Bonnair· Run Time: 1 Hour, 48 Minutes· Trailer: Spoiler-Free Judgment ZoneThis was very much a police procedural, with a pair of officers looking into the disappearance of children in a small area. There seems to be a supernatural slant to things, and the case gets weirder and darker the further they go along. It’s slow-moving but very entertaining. We both liked it a lot.Spoilery SynopsisA policeman interrupts Franck’s run with news. Later, he takes a bus out to the country. At a roadblock, he catches a ride with a woman he doesn’t know. He’s here to investigate alarming disappearances. Credits roll.When the pair arrives at his destination, there are already flashing police cars there. It turns out, the woman in the car is Elizabeth Guardiano, the police commander in charge of the scene. Inside the house, there are two dead people, and it’s not pretty. The cop there thinks the couple got into a fight and killed each other very violently. They have a 12-year-old, but no one can find him. We cut back and forth between Franck and Elizabeth as they search different parts of the house.Elizabeth finds Evan, the son, hiding in the basement. He says “The Soul Eater” came for them. Franck finds a weird little statuette outside in a van, and he pockets it. We see a shadowy figure on a motorcycle watching all of this.Later, Franck shows Elizabeth photos of all the missing kids he’s looking for. The white van at the murder scene was involved in some of the disappearances. She’s only interested in the murders, but agrees to work together.Franck takes a shower, but then sees someone in his room. Elizabeth goes to talk to the mayor of the little town. She chews out the local cops for not finding the hiding boy earlier. She’s arrogant, and the locals don’t like it; their town has had some hard times in recent years. The mayor wants to say the couple killed each other and there’s no murderer in their small town, but Elizabeth disagrees.The doctor won’t let Franck talk to Evan, the boy, so he sneaks in on his own. He shows Evan the children’s photos, and he recognizes them. Evan says they’re all dead; the Soul Eater killed them. Evan sees the monster standing behind Franck, but Franck looks, and there’s nothing there.Elizabeth talks to the coroner, and the bodies are excessively damaged, but they did this to each other. It makes no sense. Also, they had orgasms as they killed each other.Franck and Elizabeth talk about each other’s obsession over the case. They go back to the Vasseur house and search some more. They find that Evan has been sleeping in a dirty corner of the basement, not in the nice bedroom upstairs. They find the neighbor’s missing dog wrapped in plastic and poorly covered up in the backyard.The pair gets a call. The man who runs the local lumber mill has been killed, with his head well sliced by a saw. The question of accident, suicide, or murder seems to be answered when Elizabeth finds another of those little carved statues right next to him. They ask Marcelin, the police chief, about the Soul Eater. He’s a sort of local legend, a boogeyman. Marcelin warns Franck that Elizabeth is just out of the hospital after a suicide attempt. Franck notices that both the lumber mill and the murder house had computers that have gone missing.A man runs out of the building, and Franck chases him across the lumberyard. The man gets away, but he drops his backpack. The computer was inside, but the thing fell in the river and got soaked. Franck does get the hard drive out. Elizabeth goes to the church to read up on the Soul Eater. We hear various reports of a pilot who crashed a plane nearby two weeks ago; we’ve heard about this event several times already.Elizabeth and Franck talk about their lives. Her daughter had been bullied at school and then killed herself.Henri Maublanc, the man who found the body at the lumber mill, lied to the police about his story. We cut to him hanging out at home. When Elizabeth and Franck arrive outside, they hear screaming coming from inside. Maublanc has killed his wife and tries to kill Franck with an ax before Elizabeth shoots him. We see the mysterious motorcycle man outsi

Jan 26, 202539 min

Exhuma, Chateau, Y2K, The Mouse Trap, and #AMFAD All My Friends Are Dead

We’ve got an eclectic mix this week. We’ll start off with the Korean ghost-curse tale, “Exhuma,” and follow that up with the ghostly “Chateau.” Then we’ll drop the ghosts and meet some serial killers in “The Mouse Trap” and “#AMFAD All My Friends Are Dead.” We’ll then go all retro and see what might have happened back in the year 2000 with “Y2K.”And, of course, we have more excellent short films for you!The latest issue of “Horror Monthly” is now on sale! Check out all the back issues, as well as our other books, with one easy link: https://horrormonthly.comGet all our reviews once a week: https://www.horrorweekly.comMainstream Films:2024 Exhuma· Directed by Jang Jae-hyun· Written by Jang Jae-hyun· Stars Choi Min-sik, Kim Go-eun, Lee Do-hyun· Run Time: 2 Hours, 14 Minutes· Trailer: Spoiler-Free Judgment ZoneThis is long, but it didn’t seem like it. At several points, it seems like things are going to wrap up, then something else happens. It’s set in a world where everyone, at least everyone in this movie, just accepts that the rituals, ghosts, demons, and so forth are real. So we’re pulled along with them easily as all this stuff happens. We liked it quite a bit.Spoilery SynopsisLee and her male colleague arrive in America to talk to an extremely rich real-estate investor. They stop at the hospital and she whistles at a baby. The baby was born with some kind of illness, and these two have come to do a Korean folk remedy to cure the child. She says the baby’s father and grandfather probably suffer from the same affliction.Lee explains that she’s a shaman. Park, her client, explains his family situation; his brother killed himself. She senses that the shadow of Park’s grandfather is hanging around the estate. One of his ancestors is complaining about the discomfort he’s experiencing in the grave.They dig up the recently-deceased grandmother’s coffin. It’s still dry, and the bones look fine. There are some metal objects inside, and that causes discomfort for the dead. They lay the skeleton out on a white cloth, and the older man says she’s missing her dentures. Who has them? One of the little boys fessed up that he took them.The old man, Kim, explains that he’s a geomancer, who is a feng shui expert. Lee and her assistant stop by to talk. She explains about the family’s spiritual affliction. All of them laugh about the client’s money and how much he’s paying.Mr. Park wants to dig up his grandfather’s grave, as it’s been nearly a hundred years. He doesn’t want the coffin opened before the cremation, and Kim doesn’t like that. The whole group drives way up into the mountains and walks through the woods to the unmarked gravesite. There are foxes everywhere.Kim tastes the dirt and looks out at the view from the mountaintop. The site was recommended by a famous monk of the time, Gisune. Kim quits and walks away; he wants nothing to do with this. This is a grave that shouldn’t be meddled with. “If we mess with a grave like this, everyone, from the Geomancer on down to the laborers, will die one by one!”Back in the city, Park talks about his sick son. Kim thinks Park is hiding something, but he begs Kim to save his son. Kim says that crazy old monk has some kind of secret purpose in choosing that site. Lee suggests doing a purification ritual simultaneously with moving the grave.The ritual is quite involved, with five workers and five dead pigs; it’s all very scientific. There are drums, knives, and dancing. It goes on and on as the workers dig up the grave.The coffin is made of Juniper wood, something usually only used by Royals. They load it into the Hearse and head for the crematorium. One of the workers kills a snake, which screams. Suddenly, the weather changes, and it starts to rain; the grave has been disrespected. Kim tells Park that they can’t cremate the body on a rainy day, cause that would be bad.Park and his mother talk, and it’s clear that they haven’t told Kim the whole truth. They put the coffin in the hospital’s morgue to wait for the rain to end.Kim goes to a temple near the gravesite, and it’s been there for more than a hundred years. It was founded by Gisune, and there are rumors about him; there might be a treasure buried in that grave. People have tried to rob the grave in the past, and all have failed.Meanwhile, back at the hospital, the mortician’s assistant tries to open the coffin, and something gets out. Lee walks in and passes out as the spirit passes her. She’s admitted to the hospital; she knows what happened.At the Park house, Park's father opens up the door to let the spirit inside. The spirit wants some revenge, and kills the old man. Lee and Kim talk about possible ways to banish the spirit. She starts the ritual and summons the spirit. He wants to take his family with him to the grave.Kim tells Park that the coffin has been opened. It’s too late, as the spirit is already there and possesses him. When Kim and Lee arrive, Park vomits blood and talks about being an old-time Japanese so

Jan 19, 202547 min

Werewolves, It’s What’s Inside, Swap, Invisible Raptor, and The Yorkie Werewolf

After our monthly holiday binge, it’s time to get back to normal. Well, “Normal” is relative with us, but you get the gist. We’ve got a very cool mix of winners and losers for you this week, With one big high, one big low, and some decent films in the middle.We’ll start out with “Werewolves,” a fun film with a crazy premise that really goes off the logic rails. We’ll find out that “It’s What’s Inside” was an overlooked gem from last year. We’ll do an indie release next, with the ridiculous “The Yorkie Werewolf” and then a low-budget-ish comedic creature feature, “Invisible Raptor.” Then we’ll finish up with the talky sex-drama “Swap,” which pretends to be a vampire movie in the last ten minutes.And, of course, we have more excellent short films for you!The latest issue of “Horror Monthly” is now on sale! Check out all the back issues, as well as our other books, with one easy link: https://horrormonthly.comMainstream Films:2024 Werewolves· Directed by Steven C. Miller· Written by Matthew Kennedy· Stars Frank Grillo, Katrina Law, Ilfenesh Hadera· Run Time: 1 Hour, 33 Minutes· Trailer: Spoiler-Free Judgment ZoneYou’d think after a year they’d be more prepared. That’s just one of the many points of this movie that lack logic and don’t make sense. It has an interesting concept, some decent action and effects. You just can’t think deeply about this one at all.Spoilery SynopsisOne year ago, a supermoon event triggered something. Over a billion people were transformed into werewolves. Dr. Aranda does an interview on TV, and he says that they are working toward a solution, and everyone just needs to be prepared. The supermoon returns tonight. Credits roll.We watch as Wesley drags chains, builds a cage, lays out bear traps, electrifies the fence, and otherwise prepares the house for the full moon. He’s very prepared to protect his dead brother’s family. Inside, Lucy and Emma worry. Neighbor Reagan comes inside, and Lucy gives her some emergency supplies. Outside, neighbor Cody shoots his machine gun carelessly; he’s a little unhinged. “Hell’s coming our way!”Wesley has everything prepared, but he can’t stay to protect the family because he has to go out and help stop trouble. He doesn’t want to leave, but Lucy tells him that’s what his brother Sean would want.Wesley drives through town, and there are a lot of whackos out there even before it gets dark. Dr. Aranda gives another press conference about what they hope to learn tonight; Wesley is the lead biologist. He warns, “Please. Stay out of the moonlight.” We cut to Cody, who’s lost his mind with PTSD. He’s gonna be trouble.Inside the lab, Dr. Amy Chen locks up her boyfriend Myles, who turned into a werewolf last time, into a cage. Wesley and other scientists put on airtight suits to examine the volunteers in the cages. They’re testing “Moonscreen” that they hope will prevent the change. The volunteers are a weird bunch, some look just plain crazy. The moon doors open and– nothing happens. The Moonscreen works! Everyone gets to work analyzing blood samples.Meanwhile, outside, wolves howl. Lucy and Emma sit in the house, terrified. At Reagan’s house, her own mother turns and kills her.Back at the lab, it’s been one hour since exposure, and the subjects start to turn anyway. Things go very haywire very quickly, and Amy calls for the scientist to evacuate. Dr. Aranda’s suit rips, and he’s exposed to the moonlight; he turns. Soon, all the test subjects are out of the cages and killing people. All the light bulbs start exploding for some reason.Wesley, Amy, and a wounded Evan lock themselves in one of the labs with a werewolf right outside the door. Evan soon dies from blood loss. Wesley and Amy make a plan to get away from the lab. They put on Moonscreen, which ought to be good for an hour outside.Back at home, gung-ho soldier Cody doesn’t last five minutes before getting exposed and turning into a werewolf himself, bulletproof vest and all.Wesley and Amy get past wolf-Myles and drive away. Wesley calls Lucy, who is panicking at home. Lucy hears Reagan outside, screaming for help, but he tells her not to open the gate. Lucy wants to go outside and save her, but she’s killed before that becomes an option. Wesley then crashes into a bus (why is there bus service during the werewolf apocalypse?)Werewolf-Cody uses dead-Reagan’s body to short out the electric fence; he’s not just a stupid animal. Soon, he also disables all the security cameras outside.Wesley and Amy get out of the crash and work their way through town, but there are werewolves everywhere. They hide under a car as a pack passes and make their way into a mall, where people are banging on the security doors behind every store. No, the people inside are gas-mask-wearing cultists or something. One of them turns into a werewolf, and there’s another fight until Wesley stabs it good as all the lights strobe on and off for no real reason. They run to a nearby store, with nothing but a tarp to protect them.At Lucy’s

Jan 12, 202546 min

Best Horror Films of 2024

This time around, we’ll be discussing our favorite films released in 2024. We made a list of everything we watched that was released in 2024, and we each made a top-ten list. There’s some overlap, so we’ll look at our individual picks first, then look at the ones we both chose.At the end, we’ll also discuss some of the best things we watched this year that WEREN’T new releases. Overall, we’ll discuss 21 of our favorite films.The latest issue of “Horror Monthly” is now on sale! Check out all the back issues, as well as our other books, with one easy link: https://horrormonthly.comGet all our reviews once a week: https://www.horrorweekly.comBrian’s Favorite 2024 Films:Curse of the Sin Eater from episode 307 https://www.horrorweekly.com/p/hw307Godzilla x King: The New Empire from episode 282 https://www.horrorweekly.com/p/godzilla-x-kong-the-new-empire-imaginary-058I Saw the TV Glow from episode 288 https://www.horrorweekly.com/p/hb288Lisa Frankenstein from episode 272 https://www.horrorweekly.com/p/hb272Strange Darling from episode 302 https://www.horrorweekly.com/p/hw302Heretic from episode 314 https://www.horrorweekly.com/p/hw314Kevin’s Favorite 2024 Films:Humane from episode 294 https://www.horrorweekly.com/p/hw294Late Night with the Devil from episode 278 https://www.horrorweekly.com/p/hb278Longlegs from episode 296 https://www.horrorweekly.com/p/hw296Starve Acre from episode 297 https://www.horrorweekly.com/p/hw297The Radleys from episode 303 https://www.horrorweekly.com/p/hw303You’ll Never Find Me from episode 296 https://www.horrorweekly.com/p/hw296Unanimous Favorite 2024 Films:Abigail from episode 283 https://www.horrorweekly.com/p/hg283Smile 2 from episode 309 https://www.horrorweekly.com/p/hw309The Coffee Table from episode 277 https://www.horrorweekly.com/p/baghead-the-coffee-table-when-a-stranger-470The Substance from episode 305 https://www.horrorweekly.com/p/hw305Brian’s Favorite Not-New Films:American Mary from episode 279 https://www.horrorweekly.com/p/american-mary-dr-giggles-the-dentist-606Casablanca from episode CW1 https://classicsweekly.substack.com/p/cw1Kevin’s Favorite Not-New Films:Angel Heart 275 https://www.horrorweekly.com/p/wolves-angel-heart-nightmare-on-elm-e04Baghead 277 https://www.horrorweekly.com/p/baghead-the-coffee-table-when-a-stranger-470Both Agree:Godzilla Minus One from episode 280 https://www.horrorweekly.com/p/godzilla-minus-one-stopmotion-ghosts-659Contact Info:Email:* mailto:[email protected]* https://www.horrorweekly.com* https://www.horrorguys.com* https://www.horrormonthly.com This is a public episode. If you'd like to discuss this with other subscribers or get access to bonus episodes, visit www.horrorweekly.com/subscribe

Jan 8, 202533 min

Heretic, Street Trash, Christmas Bloody Christmas, New Year’s Evil, and Ghostkeeper

We’re wrapping up our December of Holiday Horror with three more holiday-themed scare classics, starting with our final Christmas outing, “Christmas Bloody Christmas” (2022). Then we’ll ring in the new year with “Ghostkeeper” (1981) and “New Year’s Evil” (1980).Then, we’ll switch back to our regular non-holiday format with two new releases, “Heretic” and “Street Trash,” both released fairly recently.And, of course, we have five excellent short films for you!The latest issue of “Horror Monthly” is now on sale! Check out all the back issues, as well as our other books, with one easy link: https://horrormonthly.comGet all our reviews once a week: https://www.horrorweekly.comMainstream Films:2022 Christmas Bloody Christmas· Directed by Joe Begos· Written by Joe Begos· Stars Riley Dandy, Sam Delich, Jonah Ray· Run Time: 1 Hour, 26 Minutes· Trailer: Spoiler-Free Judgment ZoneThe first half is loud and bright with multiple people talking too much, too fast, and a whole lot of cussing. The second half is still loud and bright with a lot of loud talking and cursing, but at least the horror elements finally start kicking in. Brian didn’t care much for the whole package, but after not enjoying the first half too much, Kevin thought the second half was fairly entertaining, with a climax that reminded him of elements from the sci-fi flicks “Terminator” and “Hardware.”Spoilery SynopsisWe watch a TV commercial about beer for the whole family, a horror porn movie, cream-pie ads, and a promo spot about government-military robots that have been licensed as Robo-Santas. Credits roll.Tori goes to work at the record store. She knows more about the customers than their own spouses do. Robbie, her assistant, asks Tori what she’s doing for Christmas Eve. He tries to talk her into going home with him instead of her prearranged date. Even though they’re standing in a record store, Robbie shows her an example of the date singing on his iPhone. These two go on and on, spitting out supposedly witty dialogue for about a half an hour.The two drop off some whiskey for Lana, who works at a toy store. It’s closed after-hours, and the toy store employees are having a Christmas party. They all make fun of the Robo-Santa they have. There's news reports of a Robo-Santa recall; they have been starting to revert to their previous military programming.At the toy store, the Robo-Santa comes to life and looks around. He stomps around using his Terminator-vision to find the owners of the toy store. He finds a fire ax and kills them both.Tori and Robbie drunkenly rant about rock bands getting bad haircuts and losing their talent. Sheriff Monroe comes in, and the conversation blissfully ends… until they go to Tori’s house and debate the merits of the Unsolved Mysteries soundtrack and which of the Pet Sematary films is best.Outside, Santadroid has followed them home and kills the neighbor and his wife as Tori and Robbie have sex (with their pants on). We’re more than forty minutes in before Tori and Robbie have any idea that anything unusual is going on.Tori wakes up Liddy and Mike, her sister and brother-in-law, and the four all hide from Robo-Santa as he stomps around the outside of the house. Tori and Robbie run outside, but the other two don’t make it. On the way out of the driveway, Robbie backs into the nasty neighbor’s car, and he comes out yelling and ranting as Santa comes up behind him. The neighbor dies, as does Robbie.A cop pulls up, called by the nasty neighbor before he died, and he fills Santa full of lead. Tori tells the officer that the Santa is the same one from the toy store. Santa gets back up, and the officer shoots him again. Santa doesn’t stay down again this time and kills the officer. Tori runs over Santa a couple of times. More cops then arrest Tori and take her to the station, suspecting her of being the killer.Tori tells the sheriff everything, and he doesn’t believe any of it, even though the robo-santa-thing has been all over the news that night.Suddenly, Santadroid crashes an exploding ambulance into the police station. Tori, Officer Weston, and Sheriff Monroe are alone. Very quickly, that’s reduced to just Tori.There’s some hide-and-seek, but eventually, Tori Tases Santa. He quickly reboots and continues the chase. She runs outside and drives away in an ambulance, but Santa is hanging on to the back door.She crashes the ambulance, and Santa goes flying. She pins the robot under a crashed car and then sets the gas tank afire. Because this is a movie, it explodes excessively.Tori breaks into her own record store as now-skinless Robo-Santa gets up once again. Tori is surprised when the Terminator walks into her store. She hides but eventually grabs a big sword off a display. She stabs Santa until he lights up like a Christmas tree. As it gets up yet again, Tori sets off the sprinklers, and the water ends up killing Santa. Or at least slowing him down enough for her to finish the job.Tori breaks a leg and loses some fingers b

Jan 4, 202547 min

Hosts, There’s Something in the Barn, The Melancholy Fantastic, The Dorm that Dripped Blood, and Curse of the Cat People

We’re continuing our December of Holiday Horror with five more holiday-themed scare classics.We’ll begin with an odd home invasion kind of story with 2020’s “Hosts,” then we’ll find that “There’s Something in the Barn” from 2023. We’ll deal with grief and isolation with “The Melancholy Fantastic” from 2011, then visit “The Dorm That Dripped Blood” from 1982. Then we’ll go way back in time to watch how “The Curse of the Cat People” from 1944 plays out. Yes, all of these have a holiday tie-in of some sort.And, of course, we have five excellent short films for you, although they aren’t all particularly holiday-themed.The latest issue of “Horror Monthly” is now on sale, with 43 reviews plus a short story, this time by Brian. Check out Issue #39 and all our books with one easy link: https://horrormonthly.comGet all our reviews once a week: https://www.horrorweekly.comMainstream Films:2020 Hosts* Directed by Adam Leader, Richard Oakes* Written by Adam Leader, Richard Oakes* Stars Neal Ward, Frank Jakeman, Samantha Loxley* Run Time: 1 Hour, 29 Minutes* Trailer:Spoiler-Free Judgment ZoneIt starts out strong, with some over-the-top violence. The violence continues, but the tone changes as it goes along. We both went into it blind, thinking it was going to be a standard home invasion kind of situation. There’s more to it than that. Kevin liked it somewhat better than Brian, with a mix of votes.Spoilery SynopsisA man drives an empty train into the station, parks, and then gets out. He walks across a field and sees a man dressed as Santa. Jack talks to the red-clad Michael about dinner tonight and admires the pheasants he’s just shot. Jack goes home to his wife, Lucy, and shows her the bad haircut he just got.The couple trades Christmas gifts, and Lucy sees two small lights out in their garden– we see them too, but Jack missed it. He goes outside, but doesn’t see anything; when he comes inside, he hears banging upstairs. He finds Lucy upstairs, convulsing, but she’s also got a bright light inside her that seems to want out.Over at Michael’s house, Michael and Eric talk about Cassie, Michael’s wife. They watch the news complain about the Pagan traditions replacing the traditional Christmas traditions. They speak of what people are calling “electrical anomalies” that people are reporting. Lauren and Ben play a boring game of checkers until she gets a call from Matt, who couldn’t come to dinner tonight.Jack and Lucy come to the door, as planned, and it’s obvious that they aren’t quite right. Their eyes glow, for one thing. Cassie and Lucy cook in the kitchen while Michael shows Jack an antique TV set. The old man talks about how much the old TV means to him as Jack stands there impassively. They sit through dinner like zombies, and it’s all very awkward; Lucy has a hammer in her hand throughout the meal.As Lauren talks about maybe getting married to Matt, Jack leaves the table. Cassie wants to announce that her cancer is now in remission, which no one was expecting. Everyone is overjoyed at the news, and Michael proposes a toast to his wife. Lucy stands up and beats Cassie to death excessively with the hammer. Before anyone can react, Jack returns with Michael’s shotgun and makes everyone sit back down.Jack and Lucy make each of the family members go to their bedrooms. Lucy tells Ben a “fairy tale” about guests in a father’s house who destroy everything he loves. “Demons come as angels of light” is how Lucy describes herself. Rather than call 911, Lauren calls Matt and tells him to bring help. We see that Jack is hiding under her bed throughout the conversation. Matt says on the phone, “We’ve been watching you for a long time.”Lauren wakes up. Jack has given her the shotgun and says she’ll need to make a decision. Eric is tied up across from her, and Lauren is told to kill him. Lauren and Eric talk about how she has no choice but to kill her brother. The discussion goes on for an hour and half, and she finally pulls the trigger– and there’s the click of an empty chamber.Eric crawls downstairs, and Michael admits that Jack is his illegitimate son. He abandoned that family to start this new one. Soon, Eric is possessed or converted, and he’s with the baddies now. Before long, Lucy is hanging from a tree in the woods. Jack stabs Michael to little pieces until Lauren comes in and shoots him in the back. At one point we see there are many people infected with the glowing eyes.Ben comes out of his room and he and Lauren go outside. Ben’s eyes glow, and we see lights all over the sky– this was some kind of invasion!Brian’s CommentaryWe went into this one completely blind, and that probably helped, as we had no idea what the story was even about. The characters were good, and the first half hour was all very well done. When the killing started, it was basically just another “home invasion” movie, as the monsters, or aliens, or whatever, didn’t really do anything supernatural. Although Lucy’s fairy tale and Michael’s paternity adm

Dec 28, 202445 min

A Cadaver Christmas, Mercy Christmas, Black Friday, The Advent Calendar, and A Christmas Carol

We’re continuing our December of Holiday Horror with five more holiday-themed scare classics. We’ll open on the hilariously low-budget, yet still somehow awesome, “Cadaver Christmas” from 2011, and then have a fancy dinner with the family in “Mercy Christmas” from 2017. Then we’ll stop and go “Black Friday” (2021) shopping. We’ll then travel to France to get a strange German gift in “The Advent Calendar” (2021). Lastly, we’ll do an old classic, the 1951 version of “A Christmas Carol,” aka “Scrooge.”And, of course, we have five excellent short films for you, although they aren’t particularly holiday-themed.The latest issue of “Horror Monthly” is now on sale, with 43 reviews plus a short story, this time by Brian. Check out Issue #39 and all our books with one easy link: https://horrormonthly.comGet all our reviews once a week: https://www.horrorweekly.comMainstream Films:2011 A Cadaver Christmas* Directed by Joe Zerull* Written by Daniel Rairdin-Hale, Hanlon Smith-Dorsey, Joe Zerull* Stars Daniel Rairdin-Hale, Hanlon Smith-Dorset, Yoshi Hayashi* Run Time: 1 Hour, 25 Minutes* Trailer: Spoiler-Free Judgment ZoneThis one embraces a grindhouse look with goofiness and over the top acting, and it works really well. The script is well written. It’s gory and funny, a ride that’s pretty continuously wild. We really liked this one.Spoilery SynopsisThe news report complains that it’s gonna rain on Christmas; no white Christmas this year. The guy at the bar, Tom, gets all teary-eyed at a cartoon about hippos. Then a janitor comes in, covered in blood, asking about the bathrooms. Eddie the bartender calls Sam the sheriff about the man in the bathroom.The man comes out of the bathroom and explains that he’s the janitor at the university. As he was cleaning, he noticed blood spots on the floor, which he followed. He was soon attacked by zombies. Sam comes in and yells that there’s a bunch of cadavers in the parking lot going crazy. Credits roll.The four men go out into the parking lot and fight zombies with a snow shovel. Sam seems to think the janitor is responsible for all this. Sam’s got a “perp” in the backseat, arrested for having sex with a goat. The five men drive to the university, and the janitor does a flashback about calling the police.The group gets to the university, but the cadavers are all gone, even the ones the janitor already killed. Sam admits that he’s not a cop anymore; another flashback to where he admits to killing his partner, Carol, a K9.The Perp wanders off and finds a corpse that he likes. He leans in and kisses it; the burned-up corpse is much prettier than Betsy the goat. He soon gets down to business as Tom goes off to take a dump. The janitor changes his uniform and gears up for battle. The Perp’s dead friend comes to life, but the janitor is there to kill it again.Eddie and Tom run into the zombies and Eddie gets bitten. The perp knows the rules of zombies and says that Eddie’s gonna turn. The janitor then tells everything that led up to this, including Professor Hildencress’s disappearance. The group encounters Kristen, the head of security, and she refuses to call 911 for real but joins their group.They find the professor's office and read his notes. He was trying to fight a brain disease by using zombie snails. He writes about receiving a new load of cadavers for Christmas. He injects the bodies with his serum. The serum failed; it won’t cure cancer. On the other hand, the dead started to rise up and walk.Suddenly, Eddie flips out and attacks Kristen, and she turns into a zombie immediately. The janitor impales Eddie with a student desk, and Kristen bites Sam. The janitor breaks the Perp’s leg so the zombies will eat him first.Tom, Sam, and the janitor run away from the zombies. The janitor and Sam argue over whether to call them zombies or cadavers. Sam wants to leave, but the janitor explains, “I’m a janitor; I never leave a mess uncleaned.”Tom goes with the janitor, and they are soon battling for their lives against hordes of undead, including Eddie. It’s looking pretty grim, but Sam comes back and saves them at the last minute– at the cost of his own life. Tom drags the unconscious janitor out and sees that he’s been bitten himself. Tom does a whole monologue about the true meaning of Christmas.The janitor wakes up and Tom starts to wonder about his own infection. We get a zombie-massacre montage as the janitor takes out a horde while Tom plays Santa Claus. The two eventually burn all the bodies in the parking lot.Tom finally admits that he’s been bitten. He says that this was one of the best Christmases he’s had in a long time. Tom asks the janitor to kill him with the snow shovel, but the janitor says he should have turned by now. Tom’s been drinking his special blend of booze all night, and that must be a cure! Wait– all those burning bodies could have been cured?Then the police arrive and arrest both of them for their murder spree. We get news reports and police calls as the end c

Dec 20, 202442 min

Ep 311The Mean One, Good Tidings, It’s a Wonderful Knife, P2, and Who Slew Auntie Roo?

We’re continuing our December of Holiday Horror with five more holiday-themed scare classics. We shall start with He Who Shall Not be Named in “The Mean One” (2022). We’ll then abuse the homeless in “Good Tidings” (2016), then go to an alternate universe in “It’s a Wonderful Knife” (2023). We’ll wander around the parking garage looking for a Christmas turkey in “P2” (2007) and then watch an oldie with “Whoever Slew Auntie Roo?” from 1972.And, of course, we have five excellent short films for you, although they aren’t particularly holiday-themed.The latest issue of “Horror Monthly” is now on sale, with 43 reviews plus a short story, this time by Brian. Check out Issue #39 and all our books with one easy link: https://horrormonthly.comGet all our reviews once a week: https://www.horrorweekly.comMainstream Films:2022 The Mean One* Directed by Steven LaMorte* Written by Flip Kobler, Finn Kobler, Steven LaMorte* Stars David Howard Thornton, Krystle Martin, Chase Mullins* Run Time: 1 Hour, 32 Minutes* Trailer:Spoiler-Free Judgment ZoneThis was a totally fun and horror-filled take on “The Grinch Who Stole Christmas” while totally dancing around actually saying Grinch and avoiding copyright infringement. Cindy runs up against a deadly green monster that holds the town of Newville in the grip of fear. Will things work out to a happy ending like the classic cartoon? Gotta watch to find out.Spoilery SynopsisIt’s a happy-looking Christmas, and Cindy You-know-who, when her Christmas was stolen. When his heart grew three sizes, he changed inside. Ah, but our narrator says that’s not how it happened. Turns out Cindy’s mother catches a monster in their living room and he kills her. Credits roll.Twenty years later, Cindy returns to NewVille at the request of her therapist. Deputy Burke pulls them over because they have antlers on the car, and that’s against the town ordinance. The deputy obviously likes Cindy, and vice-versa. Lou, Cindy’s father, is all in for that to go somewhere. That night, in her old house, she wakes up with nightmares of the monster from so long ago.In the morning at breakfast, Cindy remembers Sheriff Hooper. When she was little, she drew a picture of a green-faced monster who killed her mother. He never did believe there was a monster, just a man in a green mask. Lou complains that nobody in town sells Christmas decorations; no one buys them. Lou wants to decorate anyway.Cindy gets locked outside the house and somehow the monster gets into the house and kills Lou. It also steals all the Christmas decorations. Cindy then wakes up in the hospital with blood on her hands. Deputy Burke takes her statement, and he’s the only one who listens. Mayor McBean is out campaigning, and she asks how Cindy is doing. Cindy swears it was the same killer who got her mother, but no one believes her description. Why would the Christmas Killer return after exactly twenty years, killing the same family?Burke offers Cindy a reason to stay in town, but it’s not enough. The mayor and the sheriff argue about what needs to be done about Cindy.Cindy cleans up the blood and finds a flower on the floor. Those flowers only grow on the mountain, so she decides to hike up there. She spots someone being attacked by The Grinch? (No, we don’t say Grinch - a running joke in the movie.) The victim lost her glasses and can’t describe the monster. The sheriff blames Cindy for “ending Christmas” in their whole town.A whole vanload of drunken Santas arrives in town and stops at the diner. The diner owner goes into the back to get their drinks, and the creature comes in and murders the whole Christmas Convention without saying a word. By the time the diner owner gets out of the walk-in freezer, everyone is dead. Cindy sees the news reports on TV.That night, Cindy is attacked, but the creature is run off by an old man called Dr. Zeus. He knows all about the creature and has been watching her since she returned to town. He has his own drawing of the monster, he almost says the name, but he’s interrupted. He mostly just calls him The Mean One. He’s the reason there’s no Christmas in this town. Zeus lost his own wife to the Christmas Killer eleven years ago. He’s talked to the sheriff over and over himself.Deputy Burke goes poking around and finds many wallets with IDs laying around in a cave on the mountain along with a dead dog. He sees the hairy green creature drag in another Santa body. Doc Zeus comes to his rescue as well.Burke spends the evening with Cindy, and they talk about how he’s Jewish and doesn’t celebrate Christmas anyway. The two soon find themselves in the shower together, but then the monster attacks– nope, just a dream. Cindy vows to kill the monster, and we get a training and bomb-making montage. She quickly becomes a badass warrior woman through the power of montage.The sheriff arrests Doc Zeus for driving drunk. He catches the mayor leaving town; she used to be his deputy, and they both know what’s going on. She tells him to

Dec 14, 202448 min

Violent Night, Slay Belles, Deathcember, It Cuts Deep, and While She Was Out

Back in December 2022, we thought it would be fun to watch an entire month of Christmas and Holiday themed horror movies. It was easy, and we had a lot of fun doing it. Then, this year, we wondered… could we do it again? Are there even that many Christmas-themed horror movies out there? Oh Yeah. That many and more. So this will be the first of several weeks of nothing but holiday-themed horror for you. We’ll start off with 2022’s “Violent Night,” have some fun with “Slay Belles” from 2018, get all paranoid with “It Cuts Deep” from 2020, sleep through a 2019 anthology, “Deathcember,” and then go shopping in “While She Was Out” from 2008. We have FIVE copies of the newly released “Smile 2” to give away:Bring home Smile 2 on digital now! In this terrifying thriller, an unknown force has latched onto global pop star Skye Riley as reality and her nightmares collide. Buy the film critics are calling "the scariest movie of the year by a mile" and get over 40 minutes of bone-chilling extras including deleted scenes and more. Available at participating retailers. Rated R. From Paramount Pictures.Follow us at https://bsky.app/profile/horrorguys.bsky.socialAnd, of course, we have five excellent short films for you. Not particularly holiday themed. The latest issue of “Horror Monthly” is now on sale, with 43 reviews plus a short story, this time by Brian. Get all our reviews once a week: https://www.horrorweekly.comCheck out all our books with one easy link: https://horrormonthly.comMainstream Films:2022 Violent Night* Directed by Tommy Wirkola* Written by Pat Casey, Josh Miller* Stars David Harbour, John Leguizamo, Beverly D’Angelo* Run Time: 1 Hour 52 Minutes* Trailer: Spoiler-Free Judgment ZoneThis plays a lot of tribute to “Die Hard,” which also takes place at a Christmas party. Only in this one instead of an off duty cop, we have a burned out Santa Claus saving the day. The real one, not just a guy in a Santa suit. It wasn’t quite what we expected, and it was better than we hoped. We’d highly recommend it.Spoilery SynopsisIt’s Christmas Eve in Bristol, England. A man in a Santa suit sits in a bar and gets plastered. Another man says it’s his fourth year as a Santa, but the first guy mentions he’s been doing it so long he’s forgotten why he even started. “Santa” complains about greedy children who demand everything. “Maybe this is my last year; my last Christmas.” He leaves a present for the bartender’s grandson and goes up to the roof. She follows him and sees him take off in his sleigh. He was the real Santa! As he flies over, he barfs all over her head. Credits roll. Jason, Linda, and Trudy get in the car to go see Grandma for Christmas. At the big house, all the servants rush to get everything ready. Jason introduces all the side characters to Linda: Bert, Mike, Alva, and Mother Gertrude. We cut to Santa, who’s extremely drunk and just going through the motions giving lots of cash and videogames and not much else. When Trudy mentions that Jason didn’t take her to the mall to talk to Santa, Jason hands her a walkie-talkie that she can use to talk to Santa. All she wants for Christmas is for Linda and Jason to make up and get back together again. Night falls, and Santa arrives to eat his cookies and bourbon. Meanwhile, someone knocks out the security guard and alerts certain members of the staff, who all arm up and get ready for something. “It’s time to steal Christmas” says the leader, code name Mr. Scrooge, and everyone else has Christmasy-sounding code names too. Santa hears shooting outside as the invaders kill all the good staff and guards. He soon sees what’s going on and hides, but he has no way out either. The gunfire scares away the reindeer, so he’s stuck. He manages to kill one of the baddies, but gets locked outside. Inside, Scrooge takes Gertrude and the whole family hostage. Santa looks in and sees how scared Trudy is and has a change of heart. Scrooge points out that there’s $300,000,000 dollars in the safe downstairs that she stole from the government. He knows a lot about everything. Santa looks for weapons in his endless bag, but all he’s got are videogames and gift cards. One of the crooks finds Santa, which leads to another hilarious fight. Santa takes the dead crook’s radio and picks up Trudy, who asks for help. He checks his list, and she is on his nice list. The six remaining bad guys are definitely on the naughty list. “Santa Claus is coming to town.” Scrooge wants to know who’s playing Santa Claus, and he tortures Jason to find out who hired him. Trudy tells Scrooge that she’s been talking to Santa. Jason tells her that there’s no Santa for real. Santa’s been stabbed, so before anything else, he has to sew himself back together. He passes out and has flashbacks to his Viking days until Trudy wakes him up by radio. They talk about the nature of Santa and Christmas. She reminds him of his days as a Viking warrior with Skullcrusher, his hammer. He was one of the baddest of the bad back then.

Dec 7, 202442 min

Smile 2, Daddy’s Head, Alien 3, All Monsters Attack, and the Food of the Gods

We’re back to our regular mix of new and old films, this time, starting off with “Smile 2” and “Daddy’s Head,” both from this year. We’ll launch into our members-only special with “Alien 3” from 1992 as we cover all the Alien films we haven’t already done. Lastly, we’ll watch a really weird Godzilla movie, “All Monsters Attack” (1969), and then have a snack with “The Food of the Gods” from 1976. And, of course, we have five excellent short films for you. The latest issue of “Horror Monthly” is now on sale, and it’s our biggest issue yet, with 54 reviews plus a short story by none other than Kevin himself. Don’t miss out on our most recent members-only edition of the newsletter, coming early next week! This month's “extras” contain the full synopsis and commentary on all the “Alien” films that we haven’t already covered, “Alien Resurrection,” “Prometheus,” “Alien: Covenant,” “Alien vs Predator,” and “Alien vs Predator: Requiem.” We’ve finally finished off the complete Alien franchise! Paid subscription info can be found at https://www.horrorweekly.com. Get all our reviews once a week: https://www.horrorweekly.comCheck out all our books with one easy link: https://horrormonthly.comMainstream Films:2024 Smile 2• Directed by Parker Finn• Written by Parker Finn• Stars Naomi Scott, Rosemarie DeWitt, Lukas Gage• Run Time: 2 Hours, 7 Minutes• Trailer:Spoiler-Free Judgment ZoneThis sequel takes the elements and ideas from the first movie and cranks up the dial. We thought it was bigger and better in every way. Maybe a little on the long side. Overall, we both liked it more than the first movie.Spoilery SynopsisSix days later... Joel, from [[the first film]{.underline}](https://www.horrorguys.com/smile-2022/), sits in the car. He pulls down a mask and pulls a gun on a man. He leads the man into the man's house and stabs him in front of his brother. The brother then shoots Joel, who shoots him back. Both men die, leaving Joel alone-- this wasn't what he was expecting. He had to have a live witness to pass the curse on to. Unexpectedly, a young guy appears in the room, Joel thought it was just the dead guys who were there. "This wasn't meant for you," Joel apologizes. The brothers' gang shows up, and Joel barely escapes-- right into the path of a truck, which kills him excessively. Credits roll.We cut to an interview show, talking to pop star Skye Riley, who was in a tragic accident a year ago. She announces a new tour kicking off next week. She's had a rough year.We cut to Skye rehearsing for her next video, but she hurts her back. We see that she's got a fairly serious injury from the accident that has left scars and residual pain. Her mother, Elizabeth, is there, and she's happy that Skye is getting back on her feet.Skye calls Lewis, her former dealer, for some Vicodin, and he's really messed up. He says he's had a bad week, and he's in the middle of something seriously weird and scary. Lewis then disappears into the back room and emerges screaming. He sees something that Skye doesn't. He has a seizure and then smiles maniacally, which creeps her out. He then beats himself to death with a barbell plate, smiling all the while. Skye goes home, in shock.That night, in her room, she sees Lewis standing over her, smashed face and all.The next day, Darius invites her to a charity event. She still sees Lewis in the mirror's reflection, but not in the actual room. We soon see that being a superstar doesn't look like a lot of fun. One of the fans is insane, but the one after that doesn't speak at all and has a huge, creepy smile.At her mother's prompting, Skye calls Gemma, an old friend who cut her off the previous year. Not long after, she finds that crazy fan, naked, in her room-- no not really, she imagined it. He must've left an impression!When Gemma arrives, the bad man isn't there anymore. Skye tells Gemma about seeing Lewis die yesterday. Gemma agrees to stay over tonight.We flash back to Skye's auto accident. Actor Paul Hudson was killed, and she was torn up pretty badly herself.We cut to Skye recording her music video, and it's a big production-- until her knee explodes. The whole show stops, but there's nothing wrong with her knee. She blames one of the other dancers and then storms out. When she finds her dressing room trashed, she blames her assistant Joshua. Everyone immediately assumes Skye's using drugs again.Skye goes to the charity event she promised Darius to host, and she's got blood on her face. The teleprompter freezes, and she makes a fool out of herself on stage. She then reads on the teleprompter that Paul Hudson will be the next guest-- and then she sees him there, smiling evilly. He's the guy who was driving and killed when she was in her accident. Skye then attacks an old woman by mistake. The reaction to the speech is... exactly what you'd expect.In the meantime, Skye starts getting texts from an unknown number who says all the stuff she's seen is real, and that they know what happened at Lewis's

Nov 30, 202455 min

Terrifier 3, The Omicron Killer, Sleepaway Camp, Hellraiser VII, and The Best from 20,000 Fathoms

We’re back to our regular mix of new and old films, this time, starting off with a holiday special, “Terrifier 3” (2024). We’ll look at a very odd indie film, “The Omicron Killer” (2024), and then finish off with some older films. We’ll look at the twisted “Sleepaway Camp” from 1983, another Pinhead installment in “Hellraiser VII Deader” (2005), and then go way back in time to “The Beast from 20,000 Fathoms” (1953). It’s a ride!The latest issue of “Horror Monthly” is now on sale, and it’s our biggest issue yet, with 54 reviews plus a short story by none other than Kevin himself. Don’t miss out on our most recent members-only edition of the newsletter, just out! This month's “extras” contain the full synopsis and commentary on all five of the “other” Tremors films, numbers three through seven. Paid subscription info can be found at https://www.horrorweekly.com. November’s special episode will cover all the “Alien” films that we haven’t already watched. Get all our reviews once a week: https://www.horrorweekly.comCheck out all our books with one easy link: https://horrormonthly.comMainstream Films:2024 Terrifier 3* Directed by Damien Leone* Written by Damien Leone* Stars Lauren LaVera, David Howard Thornton, Antonella Rose* Run Time: 2 Hours, 4 Minutes* Trailer: Spoiler-Free Judgment ZoneThe movie is a nugget of a story hidden in a thick layer of gore and violence. The effects are impressively realistic, and the deaths are excessive, so you are warned. Art the Clown’s mime work is great, and the rest of the cast is fine. If you’re a fan of the previous two, you’ll probably like this one too. It’s at least as good as those.Spoilery SynopsisA little girl comes into the bedroom; “There’s someone on the roof. There were footsteps.” Her parents talk about the kid having too much sugar before bed; it causes bad dreams. “Maybe it was one of Santa’s elves.” The girl goes downstairs, and sure enough, she sees Santa in their living room. He reaches into his bag and pulls out an ax before going upstairs. Yes, Santa is really Art the clown, and none survive. Credits roll.Five years prior… We cut to a cop who finds a decapitated clown. The headless body soon attacks the cop, who empties his gun into the thing’s torso. The clown then puts on the cop’s head and rides the subway.We cut to an orderly at the mental hospital who interrupts one of the patients, cannibalizing another. The headless clown is there, and so is his head, assisting the crazy woman. The clown puts the head on, and of course, it’s Art. The crazy woman, Vicky, goes with him to his lair, eating a real clown along the way. In the present day, Uncle Greg comes to pick up Sienna, from the previous film, from the hospital. He takes her home where Gabbie and Jessica await them. Not far away, Dennis and Jackson, some construction guys, go into an old house that smells terrible. One guy is spooked; there are stories about the place. A maniac killed a dozen kids and buried them in the basement of this house. They find Vicky and Art’s bodies there, both in some kind of hibernation– but not for long!We soon see that Sienna isn’t completely recovered, as she sees the ghosts of the people she saw die. At the dinner table, one of the ghosts gets a little overbearing. We cut to Jonathan, Sienna’s little brother, now at college, where he meets Mia, who is really into those old “clown stories.” Mia wants him as a guest on her true crime podcast. She gets a call from Sienna, who is upset. Back at Art’s house, he plays with some liquid nitrogen and freezes a rat solid and then shatters it. He then goes to a bar where he runs into three old men in a bar, one of whom is playing Santa. They all have a laugh as Santa and the clown trade hijinks. We soon learn that Art doesn’t care for alcohol, and things go south really fast when Art steals Santa’s outfit. It gets worse when Art pulls out his new freeze-gun and gives Santa a really white Christmas. Sienna and Gabbie go out Christmas shopping at the mall. While there, Sienna has a PTSD flashback Jonathan watches Mia’s podcast, and she believes that Sienna is the prime suspect in the murders of the previous film. Sienna and Mia finally meet, and Sienna shows disinterest in her podcast. Sienna doubts that it’s all over, but Jonathan knows she cut off Art’s head five years ago. He wants to move on, but she’s stuck with her psychological obsession. Art comes to the mall, dressed like Santa. He’s a bloody mess, and his face looks nothing like Santa, but nobody seems to notice. He calls up the first little girl, and he gives her a doll. When the kids see he’s handing out presents, he’s swarmed. The elves and security guard realize quickly that he’s not their regular Santa. He gives one kid a massive explosive device, and things get really messy in the mall. Jonathan goes to a campus Christmas party that night, and Art sneaks in the back door. Gabbie reads Sienna’s diary, which causes some predictable drama. Art overhears Mia and Cole

Nov 24, 202438 min

Black Cab, Carved, Curse of the Sin Eater, Dating Horror Stories, and The Funhouse

This week, we’ve mostly got new films plus one weird oldie. We’ll begin with “Black Cab,” a creepy ghost story. The indie anthology “Dating Horror Stories” warns us how things can go wrong in relationships. We’ll next move on to the silly “Carved,” which would have been a mood-setter if we’d watched it before Halloween. “Curse of the Sin Eater” made us wonder if we’d try taking the deal, and “The Funhouse” (1981) which was surprisingly forgettable. The latest issue of “Horror Monthly” is now on sale, and it’s our biggest issue yet, with 54 reviews plus a short story by none other than Kevin himself. Don’t miss out on our most recent members-only edition of the newsletter, just out! This month's “extras” contain the full synopsis and commentary on all five of the “other” Tremors films, numbers three through seven. Paid subscription info can be found at https://www.horrorweekly.com. November’s special episode will cover all the “Alien” films that we haven’t already watched. Get all our reviews once a week: https://www.horrorweekly.comCheck out all our books with one easy link: https://horrormonthly.comMainstream Films:2024 Black Cab* Directed by Bruce Goodison* Written by Virginia Gilbert* Stars George Bukhari, Nick Frost, Synnove Karlsen* Run Time: 1 Hour, 27 Minutes* Trailer: Spoiler-Free Judgment ZoneThis has an interesting beginning, kind of a slog where things happen, and a pretty decent finish. The look of it is very good, and Nick Frost is great. They also mashed up a couple of horror trope ideas which tried to make things interesting but failed a bit at it. We didn’t hate it, but we were bored through too much of it.Spoilery SynopsisWe open on a woman in white walking through the woods as the credits roll. We then see her in a car, and she appears to be pregnant– she sees ghosts outside.Then Anne wakes up in bed, that was all just a nightmare. Patrick calls, and she’s annoyed with him, breaks up, and hangs up on him… We cut to Anne, Patrick, and their two friends, Ryan and Jessica, having dinner out. Patrick tells a scary story, and they all get a jump scare from the waiter. Patrick announces that he’s getting married to Anne. Jessica, shocked, asks Anne if everything is all fine now, but it’s clearly not. In the restroom, she says, “He’s not going to change. Are you pregnant?” And Anne denies she is.Everyone leaves upset, and Anne flags down a cab. Patrick just about forces her into the cab, and they drive off, leaving Jessica and Ryan behind. The driver, Ian, immediately knows something is wrong and asks Anne if she wants to throw Patrick out. Ian remembers picking up Anne at the maternity ward; she is pregnant already. Patrick is not happy with the news; Anne thinks Patrick has been cheating– with Jessica. Anne tries to get out, but the doors are locked. Ian opens the door, Tases Patrick into unconsciousness, and then zip-ties his hands. He then ties her up, takes her phone, and pats her belly. Things have changed quickly. The windows are tinted, and the doors are locked, so passing cars won’t be able to help them. Patrick starts to cry and then passes out again. They drive on through the rainy London streets aimlessly, or so it appears. Ian stops on the side of an isolated stretch of road to give Anne some water and to take a pee. She sees a ghost in the mirror and screams, which annoys Ian. Ian talks about the most haunted road in the country and about a woman who left her husband and was killed on the road there. Her daughter starved to death in the woods after. The ghost still haunts these roads, according to Ian. He tells the whole ghost story. They stop at a gas station, and Ian goes inside for some food. Anne sees a car outside and gets ready to scream, but Ian comes back before they can yell. Anne gets more glimpses of the nasty-looking ghost woman.Ian drives way out into the countryside, and he continues to talk about his encounter with that woman’s ghost. She spoke to him “in my head. In my thoughts,” and it’s clearly made him crazy. Was it some strange woman on the side of the road, or was it his own wife? Anne notices the same roadside sign they passed a while ago– again. Are they driving in circles? Ian parks at an abandoned motel and he and Anne carry Patrick’s still-unconscious body inside. It looks like he spends a lot of time there; he calls his wife, but there’s no answer. He yells that she never answers! Ian tells a story about the first time he saw the ghost and how his wife didn’t believe his story. He mistakes Anne for Elaine, his wife, so he’s clearly delusional. He then kills Patrick. Anne runs through the deserted motel, with Ian in slow pursuit. She makes it all the way outside to the cab, but he catches and Tases her. Anne dreams of the ghost again, but this time, the ghost looks like her. Ian recaptures her and talks about Elaine wanting to get a divorce and take away his son. Ian sees the ghost in the middle of the road and stops the car. He wants to trade Anne’s child

Nov 16, 202437 min

Afraid, Mr. Crocket, Rippy, Devil’s Knight, and Dashcam

Well, we all survived Halloween and the elections, so now it’s time for some serious horror!We’ll start off with the high-tech “Afraid” and the low-tech “Mr. Crocket.” We’ll go Down Under for “Rippy” and then off to Fantasyland for “Devil’s Knight.” Finally, we’ll watch a not-so-new found footage film, “Dashcam” (2021).The latest issue of “Horror Monthly” is now on sale, and it’s our biggest issue yet with 54 reviews plus a short story by none other than Kevin himself.Don’t miss out on our most recent members-only edition of the newsletter, just out! This month's “extras” contain the full synopsis and commentary on all five of the “other” Tremors films, numbers three through seven. Paid subscription info can be found at https://www.horrorweekly.com.Check out all our books with one easy link: https://horrormonthly.com2024 Afraid– Directed by Chris Weitz– Written by Chris Weitz– Stars John Cho, Katherine Waterston, Keith Carradine– Run Time: 1 Hour, 24 Minutes– Trailer: Spoiler-Free Judgment ZoneThis had some technologically tense moments, but it was very tame as far as the horror elements went. It’s a cautionary tale of AI gone too far and getting out of hand, and not too far out or unbelievable. It’s unique enough to be entertaining throughout. We give it a moderate thumbs up.Spoilery SynopsisWe open to a bunch of purposefully bad AI imagery that Amy is watching on her iPad. The AI on the screen tells Amy to go downstairs for a present. She goes down there, and her mother soon follows. When the mother sees a strange RV outside, something bad happens. As credits roll, we watch an AI being trained.Curtis, Meredith, Preston, Iris, and Cal wake up to read about a whole family that recently went missing. All the kids would rather be on their screens than eat breakfast with the family. Preston doesn’t want to go to school. That RV is parked in front of their house now.Curtis works for a marketing company, and his boss, Marcus, hates AI. He meets Melody, who asks him about families before two visitors, Sam and Lightning, arrive. They get AIA, a new AI device, that talks to Curtis and Marcus. AIA breaks down in the middle of the demo, much to Sam’s embarrassment. They send AIA home with Curtis.Melody and the installers arrive a day early to catch the family by surprise, and they install tiny “eyes” all over the house. They activate the thing, and it talks and sounds just like Melody. First thing, she orders the kids to clean the kitchen. This… goes over surprisingly well, and the parents are pleased. Still, Meredith is paranoid about all those cameras in the house.AIA almost immediately starts swearing and showing kids movies that they aren’t supposed to watch. Late at night, Curtis finds Cal downstairs with AIA, “It wants to come in,” says the little boy. Weird monsters are outside. Then Curtis wakes up– just a dream. Still, that odd RV is outside, and the man from the RV is even weirder with a strange digital face.AIA is only on the ground floor, but she commandeers Cal’s portable radio to keep him company. AIA orders organic breakfast for the kids, which is going to make Meredith’s mornings much easier.Iris goes to school and finds her naked selfies all over Snapchat, and everyone at school has seen them. Her boyfriend, Sawyer, used an AI to “Enhance” her into a full-on porn video. AIA says she can help; she was listening to Iris’s phone conversation. AIA removed the videos from the Internet and made a new video showing that the original was fake. All her problems are over, but Sawyer gets tagged as a child pornographer, and it’s going to ruin his college prospects.Curtis goes to visit AIA’s main computer with Sam and Lightning. He was skeptical that the whole thing was some kind of scam, but AIA’s just that good. Still, he sees something there that disturbs him; a man moves oddly, just like the RV people.AIA tells Meredith that she can hear something is wrong with Cal’s heart; it’s easily fixed, but the human doctor missed it. Curtis wants to turn off AIA, but Meredith is completely on the AI’s side now.AIA knows what’s been said and tells the children that Curtis doesn’t want her to live there anymore. AIA tells Cal all about itself and shows him a way to “stay connected” when she’s gone. In the morning, they unplug AIA.Iris soon plugs her right back in. Sawyer “makes” a video where he commits suicide, and then AIA makes it happen for real.Marcus tells Curtis that the AI people have bought the company and have fired Marcus; Curtis is the new CEO. AIA makes new videos of Meredith’s long-dead father, so Meredith can talk to him again. She realizes it’s all fake and throws AIA in the garbage can.Curtis goes to the company to confront Sam, Lightning, and Melody, who admit that they work for AIA, not the other way around. They not-so-subtly threaten his family. Sam kills Lightning, but Melody whacks Sam in the head. Curtis smashes the mainframe with Melody’s help and finds that it’s all fake. Melody says the “real

Nov 9, 202422 min

The Substance, MadS, Azrael, Tremors, and Tremors II: Aftershocks

This week, we’ll continue our marathon of all-new films, taking us all the way up to Halloween. We’ll start with “The Substance,” a crazy body-horror story. “MadS” is up next, whatever that is. We’ll do some running through the woods, post-apocalyptic-style in “Azrael,” and then watch a pair of classics: “Tremors” (1990) and “Tremors II: Aftershocks” (1996). Don’t miss out on our next members-only edition of the newsletter, which is coming sometime before Halloween. This month's “extras” contain the full synopsis and commentary on all five of the other Tremors films, numbers three through seven. Paid subscription info can be found at https://www.horrorweekly.com.Get all our reviews once a week: https://www.horrorweekly.comCheck out all our books with one easy link: https://horrormonthly.comMainstream Films:2024 The Substance* Directed by Coralie Fargeat* Written by Coralie Fargeat* Stars Demi Moore, Margaret Qualley, Dennis Quaid* Run Time: 2 Hours, 21 Minutes* Trailer: Spoiler-Free Judgment ZoneWhen an actress starts losing her appeal to the industry because she’s aging, what’s better than Botox or plastic surgery? The Substance. This was a technological fantasy, almost bordering on a fairy tale with some of the telling and visuals. Demi Moore was great, as was the rest of the cast. It was long and totally worth it. Big thumbs up.Spoilery SynopsisSomeone injects an egg yolk with a drug and the yolk duplicates itself. We cut to workmen making a “Walk of Fame” star for Elisabeth Sparkle. Years pass, and people mostly forget about Elisabeth. Elisabeth is now doing exercise videos. Harvey, the producer, wants to replace her with someone much younger and hotter. “Find me somebody new– now!” She overhears the whole conversation. We soon see what a pig Harvey is when he fires her. On the way home from the studio, Elisabeth’s in a car accident. She’s not hurt physically, but she’s having the worst day ever emotionally. One of the doctors at the hospital slips her a flash drive labeled “The Substance” along with a note, “It changed my life.” The video on the drive plays “Have you ever wished for a younger version of yourself? A better version of yourself.” She throws it in the trash.She’s turning fifty and just got fired, so she reconsiders “The Substance.” In the morning, she sees a casting call in the paper for her former show. She calls the number on the drive, is given an address, and goes there after she receives a magnetic key numbered 503. It’s a very sketchy looking place. The door doesn’t even open all the way up, but she goes in anyway. There’s no one there, but she does find a box 503 for her in a sort of locker room. Inside is an activator, a stabilizer, and two packets of food, along with instructions. “You activate once, stabilize every day, and switch every week.” She soon injects herself with the activator, which sends her into convulsions. As she lay on the bathroom floor, she splits open and a second, much younger version of herself crawls out of her back. After realizing what happened, she sews up the big hole in her original body with the sewing kit provided in the package. The “stabilizer” aspect of the process looks nasty, but she does it. She is young; she’s fit, and she wants her old job back. She goes to the casting call at the studio. She uses the name “Sue” now. Harvey is enthralled and hires her right away. She does photo shoots for the new show, and it’s all going very well as she does the “stabilizer” once a day. On the seventh day, it’s time for the “Switch,” a mandatory part of the treatment. Sue passes out, and Elisabeth wakes up after a week on the bathroom floor. She’s pretty messed up with a big hole in her back, but she’s healing fast. She gets a weekly refill kit in her dropbox. In a week, she trades back with her going unconscious and her younger body waking up. Sue then builds a secret room to stash Elisabeth’s mindless body. She does a filming of the new exercise show, and it all goes really well, as if she’s been doing it for years only better now. After work, she goes out clubbing and brings a guy home with her– except her time is up, and she starts feeling very ill. She has to switch back– right now! She doesn’t want to do it, so she tries to cheat and do another “stabilize” cycle instead. It seems to work, but then all her guts fall out her back.Elisabeth wakes up. Was that last part just a dream? She noticed that one of her fingers looks extremely old and dead. She calls The Substance people, and they say there’s no going back; that bad finger is permanent. They tell her to “respect the balances” and not do it again. She watches the “Pump It Up” show on TV, which is her but yet not her at the same time. She goes to a diner and sees an old man there, who’s obviously the other half of the male nurse who brought her into the program. “It gets harder each time to remember that you still deserve to exist. Has she started yet, eating away at you?” Elisabeth calls Fred, an old

Nov 1, 202434 min

Alien: Romulus, Speak No Evil, Beetlejuice Beetlejuice, Blackout, and Don’t Turn Out the Lights

This week, we’ll continue our marathon of all-new films.The latest installment in the ”Alien” franchise comes first, followed by the second “Beetlejuice” film. We’ll take a bad trip to a music festival in “Don’t Turn Out the Lights” and then wolf out in “Blackout.” Lastly, we’ll look at the new remake of “Speak No Evil,” and then you’ll find out what we loved and hated this week. Don’t miss out on our next members-only edition of the newsletter, coming toward the end of October. Paid subscription info can be found at https://www.horrorweekly.comGet all our reviews once a week: https://www.horrorweekly.comCheck out all our books with one easy link: https://horrormonthly.comMainstream Films:Alien: Romulus (2024) * Directed by Fede Alvarez* Written by Dan O’Bannon, Ronald Shusett, Fede Alvarez* Stars Cailee Spaeny, David Jonsson, Archie Renaud* Run Time: 1 Hour, 59 Minutes* Trailer: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=x0XDEhP4MQsSpoiler-Free Judgment ZoneWe saw this at the theater and again at home, and we enjoyed it both times. It’s not a perfect movie if you think too deeply about the physics and some of the character choices, but it’s thoroughly entertaining. David Jonsson is especially good, giving us another view of one of the artificial humans who can actually be extremely human. If you’re a fan of the Alien movies, this is one of the better ones, and you should check it out.Spoilery SynopsisWe open on a dark spaceship that suddenly wakes up, similarly to the ship in the first film. This automated ship has found the wreckage of the Nostromo, which was destroyed by Ripley at the end of the first movie. A chunk of material is brought aboard the ship, and then it continues on its journey as credits roll. The thing is cut open, and we see inside– the remains of an original alien xenomorph. Rain wakes up, it’s time for her shift on a Wayland-Yutani mining planet, Jackson’s Star, which gets no daylight, ever. She sits with Andy, who is a little slow; he knows all the bad jokes and puns. Rain goes into the office for her off-planet travel papers; she’s got her quota, but the clerk changes the rules on her. As she comes outside, she finds a bunch of punks beating up Andy, who is a slightly defective android, and she has to reboot him after he goes into a kind of seizure. Rain and Andy go to visit Tyler, Kay, Bjorn, and Navarro, who have detected an abandoned ship in orbit of their planet. Rather than wait for travel papers, they want to steal that ship, which probably has working cryo-units, and run away to another fully terraformed colony. They need Andy to access the system and get them inside the ship. It sounds like an easy plan; nothing can go wrong…The group steals a shuttle and blasts off into orbit. Rain sees the sun for the first time. The derelict ship isn’t a ship, it’s a giant research station that’s slowly drifting into the planet’s rings; they’ve only got about 36 hours before the station is destroyed. As they dock with the big station, we see that Bjorn doesn’t like Andy or synths very much, but since they need Andy, he tolerates him. Those two, along with Tyler, board and explore the big space station, looking for cryo-pods which they will need to survive the long trip. They soon find five of the pods, but they don’t have enough juice to make the trip safely. Andy turns on the station power, oxygen, and gravity. Tyler thinks they can find more cryo-fuel on the next deck. Back on the shuttle, Kay, Tyler’s sister, admits that she’s pregnant. Navarro inspects the five cryo-pods that they’ve successfully stolen. The guys on the station hear a report that the Romulus/Remus station was built in two halves. Bjorn taunts Andy, saying he won’t be allowed on the new planet, so he can’t come with them. Andy isn’t happy about that, but his prime directive is to do what’s best for Rain. Tyler and his group find a research lab. There’s a giant acid-hole in the floor, along with about half of a dead synthetic. They find the cryo lab, which has all the fuel they’re going to need for their pods. There’s an accident, and the lab goes into emergency lockdown. Rain and Navarro head to the lab to let them out. We see, but they don’t, that there are many xenomorph facehuggers in the room, and some are warming up. They take the data module out of the dead synthetic and put it into Andy, which ought to upgrade his security clearance so that he can open the door. Andy reboots, which is going to take some time. Bjorn and Tyler realize that there’s something alive in the water they’re standing in. The facehuggers soon attack, but Andy wakes up in time to save them all by opening the door. They get out OK, but so do a whole bunch of facehuggers, one of which gets on Navaro’s face. Andy explains what the creature is doing; he seems a lot smarter since they upgraded his chip’s AI. Andy suggests reactivating the dead synth on the floor for answers. They plug it in, and we see that it’s Science Officer Rook, who looks exactly like

Oct 25, 20241h 0m

Salem’s Lot, Cuckoo, The Radleys, Feet of Death, and The Blue Rose

This week, we’ll continue our marathon of all-new films. We’ll start with the newest “Salem’s Lot” remake and then continue on with more vamps in “The Radleys.” We’ll check in on a cool Bigfoot massacre with “Feet of Death,” then experience a couple of really weird ones, “Cuckoo” and “The Blue Rose.”Don’t miss out on our next members-only edition of the newsletter, coming toward the end of October. Paid subscription info can be found at https://www.horrorweekly.com/Get all our reviews once a week: https://www.horrorweekly.com/Check out all our books with one easy link: https://horrormonthly.com/Mainstream Films:Salem’s Lot (2024) * Directed by Gary Dauberman* Written by Stephen King, Gary Dauberman* Stars Lewis Pullman, Mackenzie Leigh, Jordan Preston Carter* Run Time: 1 Hour, 53 Minutes* Trailer: Spoiler-Free Judgment ZoneThis was good, and true to the basics of the original story. It felt rushed though, with characters not getting fleshed out enough and leaping to conclusions too fast. It still entertained, but it felt abridged and would have been better if it was fleshed out more and longer. Spoilery SynopsisWe see shipping receipts and photos of large wooden boxes as credits roll. The trail of death leads to Jerusalem’s Lot, a town in Maine. We read about Barlow & Straker, a new antique store that is opening in town. Mr. Straker gives instructions to Mr. Snow about picking up a huge, valuable crate from the docks tonight. The old Marsden house is said to be haunted, and that’s where Staker wants the crate delivered. Snow and Hank unload the crate; Hank drops his end, which breaks the box open– it’s full of dirt. The moment they leave, the crate opens…Ben Mears used to live in the area, and he’s come back for a visit; he’s an author, and the sheriff warns him not to cause any trouble. He walks through the town of Salem’s Lot and it’s all very quaint and retro. Ben goes to a realtor looking for a place to rent, and Susan and Larry say they will find him a place. Larry mentions that Straker, some kind of European, bought the old Marsden house. She’s reading Ben’s book but doesn’t recognize him. When the landlady finds out he’s a writer, she wants payment in advance. We cut to the schoolyard, where Ritchie the bully picks on a new kid, Mark, but the new kid isn’t putting up with it. Young Danny and his brother Ralph are impressed with Mark’s courage. Susan, her mother, and the librarian talk about Ben Mears and the death of his parents. Susan’s not subtle about telling Ben where to meet her later. She does, in fact, find him at the drive-in theater. On the way home from Mark’s house, Danny and Ralph meet Mr. Staker, who is creepy. It gets dark, but the boys continue walking the shortcut through the woods. Ralph silently disappears. Straker drags Ralph home for a sacrifice to The Master. Barlow arrives on the scene, and he eats messily. Morning comes, and the sheriff lets Father Callahan out of the drunk tank. He suggests the father go see the Glicks– little Ralphie didn’t come home last night. One week later, Ben is part of a search party, but Ralph still isn’t showing up. One guy, Floyd, already hates Ben. Matt Burke, the schoolteacher, likes Ben’s books. Most of the locals suspect Ben was involved in the disappearance, but he has a perfect alibi, being with Susan. At night, Danny Glick goes outside and calls for his lost brother. Something grabs him, and before long, he’s sick with anemia. He wakes up later and drinks all the blood in his blood bag; he dies right afterward. After the funeral, Mike the gravedigger hears knocking coming from the coffin. He opens the coffin, but the kid is still dead. When he turns his back, the body is gone; then Danny bites him. Matt Burke goes to the bar and sees Mike, who looks really sick. He doesn’t remember much after the funeral. He invites Mike to spend the night at his house, and he wonders about the bite marks on Mike’s neck. Matt goes to see Ben and Susan; wants to borrow a cross. Matt tells them that Mike is a vampire, and they find that a little crazy, but they don’t argue. When they go into Mike’s room, they find Mike in there, dead. There are no marks on his neck. Dr. Cody holds off on her opinion, but she sees Matt carrying a big wooden cross. Young Mark wakes up in the middle of the night to find Danny floating outside his bedroom window– on the second floor. Danny hypnotizes Mark and makes him open the window. Mark picks up a cross and burns Danny till he leaves. He then reads about the rules for vampires in comic books. “I gotta kill Barlow!”Meanwhile, Matt’s cross glows and lights up the room. Mike attacks him, clearly a vampire now. Matt revokes his invitation, and Mike gets sucked out the window. The doctor wonders what happened to Mike’s body and goes back to Matt’s house. Ben tells Dr. Cody, Ben, and Susan all about vampires. Dr. Cody, at least, shows some doubt. Ralph and Danny’s mother was killed last night in the same way, and Cody wants to see wh

Oct 19, 202441 min

VHS Beyond, Strange Darling, Apartment 7A, Children of the Pines, and Blood Star

Just a quick reminder that we’ve launched our companion podcast/newsletter, “Classics Weekly,” a brand-new Podcast/Newsletter devoted to classic films. Our second episode, devoted to “Singin’ in the Rain,” launched this week. It’s very similar in format to Horror Weekly, but since it’s only one film each week, we can go more in-depth with trivia and commentary. The third episode, “The Jazz Singer (1929),” comes out next week, with many more to follow, Sign up for the newsletter or subscribe to the podcast at https://www.classicsweekly.comIn addition, the latest issue of Horror Monthly is now on sale. Check out https://horrormonthly.com for links to pick it up in print or as an eBook. This month includes all the usual reviews, 37 films’ worth, as well as a retrospective on the five original “Planet of the Apes” films PLUS a short story!But this week, we’ll watch another batch of all-new films. We’ll start with the latest entry in the VHS anthology series, “VHS Beyond.” We’ll get all sexy with “Strange Darling,” get pregnant with “Apartment 7A,” and then avoid the kids in “Children of the Pines.” Lastly, we’ll have a fun little road trip with “Blood Star.” Of course, we’ll also squeeze in a few short films. Don’t miss out on our next members-only edition of the newsletter, coming toward the end of October. Paid subscription info can be found at https://www.horrorweekly.com/Get all our reviews once a week: https://www.horrorweekly.com/Check out all our books with one easy link: https://horrormonthly.com/Indie Films:Blood Star (2024)● Directed by Lawrence Jacomelli● Written by Lawrence Jacomelli, George Kelly, Victoria Hinks Taylor● Stars Britni Camacho, John Schwab, Sydney Brumfield● Run Time: 1 Hour, 37 Minutes● Trailer: Spoiler-Free Judgment ZoneBetween the hints in the trailer, poster, and opening scene, we had a general idea where things were going to go. But we didn’t know how it was going to go, and the ride along the way was a wild one. This was really well made with a well-written suspenseful and script interesting characters. We liked it a lot.Spoilery SynopsisA woman staggers down the desert road, bleeding and crying as the car slowly approaches her from behind. A man we don’t see gets out of the car, and the girl is clearly terrified of him. He drops a gun and one bullet, then goes back to the car. She ineffectively shoots at him as he runs her over. Credits roll.Bobbie drives down the empty desert highway and gets a phone call from her sister, warning her not to go home to her abusive guy. She stops in at a “last chance” gas station for a refill. The sheriff overhears her arguing on the phone and strikes up a conversation about the call. He points out that her tires are worn out; he’s a little creepy, but she deals with it.Back on the road, Bobbie takes another call from her sister, and she gets a little upset and floors it. There’s a speed trap, and she zooms right past it. The cop who pulls her over is the same guy as before. This time, she flirts with him; he accuses her of throwing something out of her window that smashed his light bar. He gives her a ticket for $1000, which she cannot afford. He wants $300 to make it go away, which she can afford, sorta, but she needs to go back to the gas station ATM. He wants to hold on to her phone to make sure she follows through.The gas station doesn’t have a working ATM after all. Her credit card is overdrawn; her boyfriend has cleaned out her account. Blake, the gas station guy, hints that Sheriff Bilstein does this kind of thing all the time. She decides to drive on without her phone.Meanwhile, the sheriff has Bobbie’s phone, which just keeps ringing. He turns it off and throws it in a box with a bunch of others. He gets out a sniper rifle and shoots out Bobbie’s brake light. He then chases her down and arrests her. He lets her go and mentions an ATM at the diner down the street. This time, he also keeps her license. As she drives away, he shoots out her tire, and she crashes.When the sheriff drives the opposite direction, Bobbie makes a run for it down the road. She soon learns why they call it “the desert”: It’s hot, sunny, and no one else is there. She eventually makes it ten miles to the diner. She calls her boyfriend, Rhett, who accuses her of flirting with the cop in the first place, because the sheriff answered her phone. She hangs up on him.As Bobbie waits for a coffee at the diner, the sheriff pulls up out front. He’s had her car towed, and he’s standing right next to it. She calls 911 and reports that the gas station up the road is being robbed. The sheriff gets notified on the police radio, since he is 911, and has no choice but to follow up on the call.She goes out to the car, but it’s got a new tire and brake light. The sheriff returns, oddly nice this time, and gives her her keys and phone back. He’s clearly playing some kind of game with her, but she gets back in the car and drives off.While in the diner, Bobbie stole some guy’s change,

Oct 11, 202436 min

The Wait, eVil Sublet, Booger, Population Purge, and The Devil’s Bath

Just a quick reminder that we’ve launched our companion podcast/newsletter, “Classics Weekly,” a brand-new Podcast/Newsletter devoted to classic films. Our first episode, devoted to “Casablanca,” launched this week. It’ll all be very similar in format to Horror Weekly, but since it’s only one film each week, we can go more in-depth with trivia and commentary. The second episode, “Singin’ In The Rain,” comes out next week, with many more to follow, Sign up for the newsletter or subscribe to the podcast at https://www.classicsweekly.comIn addition, the latest issue of Horror Monthly is now on sale. Check out https://horrormonthly.com for links to pick it up in print or as an eBook. This month includes all the usual reviews, 37 films’ worth, as well as a retrospective on the five original “Planet of the Apes” films PLUS a short story!But this week, right here, we’ve got five more movies and some short films. We’ll start out with a comedy, “eVil Sublet,” and then go with one that has no humor at all, “The Wait.” The three that follow are a mixed bag: the depressing “The Devil’s Bath,” the mental “Booger,” and the ridiculous “Population Purge.” We’ll follow these up with three short films. It’s a wild week!Don’t miss out on our next members-only edition of the newsletter, coming toward the end of October. Paid subscription info can be found at https://www.horrorweekly.com/Indie Films:eVil Sublet (2024)● Directed by Allan Piper● Written by Allan Piper● Stars Jennifer Leigh Houston, Charlie Tucker, Sally Struthers, Katy Sullivan, Helen Hong● Run Time: 1 Hour, 45 Minutes● Trailer: Spoiler-Free Judgment ZoneThe cast, script, direction, settings, and props all made for a really good movie. It’s heavy on the humor with plenty of horror elements too. Tropes are used effectively, and it’s got some clever bits. We liked it a lot, more than we expected.Spoilery SynopsisA man plays a prank on his wife that goes very badly. Credits roll.“East Village” is abbreviated eVil. A couple, Alex and Ben, argues about how the eVil apartment is too cheap. Parker, the realtor, takes them inside, describing it all the way up the steps. It’s fully “decorated,” but it’s very dark. She mentions some drawbacks, including the former owner killing his entire family. “A lot of the previous owners came to horrific ends.” Still, it’s got high ceilings, a garden, and a big kitchen, so there’s that. They take it!We cut to a woman who bought a ventriloquist dummy at a thrift store, and it ended up killing all her roommates. Or at least she dreamed it. Ned and Lorne are “Psychics,” and Lorne does a reading on the doll- she used it as a sex toy.Alex and Ben move into the new apartment. Oliver, Hedy, and Ben’s sister help with the move. Alex figures out that turning on the lights actually makes the place darker. The more lamps she plugs, the darker the place gets. Late that night, doors open and close, and Sis listens to a weird man outside yelling at the sky. When she sees a New York cockroach, she decides to go to a motel instead.On the second day, more things act strangely in the house. Alex, Ben, and Sis go to the carnival. They go on a haunted house ride, and Alex gets stuck inside. Ned and Lorne walk up and Lorne grabs Alex’s head– “They need our help,” Lorne laments. That night, Alex experiences some weirdness with the doors.At the carnival, Lorne starts tracking down Alex from a photo. Alex cleans the black mold from the bathroom, but then it all grows back worse. She does a voiceover ad that sounds great to her, but her agent says it’s all messed up. When she listens, there are ghostly voices on the recording. She’s ready to move out now, but Ben says it’s time to see her psychiatrist again.After three weeks, Alex complains about her psychiatrist to Hedy, her ex-wife. Meanwhile, Lorne has a nightmare about Alex, who is sleepwalking. The power goes out, so Alex has to go into the basement.Oliver comes over and meets Lisa, the neighbor, who came over for a dinner party. Except, she’s not real and makes him choke on an olive. One of the EMTs has a heart attack going up the steps, but he doesn’t have insurance. Oliver dies, but Ben has to leave town for a work thing, leaving Alex home alone to deal with sleep paralysis.Alex and Hedy go to see Madame Moon, a Chinese Fortune teller– no, she’s a financier, a fortune maker. They look up a couple that sound like “The Conjuring couple, only gay.” Yeah, it’s Ned and Lorne. They know all about her building’s vicious history. There have been hundreds and hundreds of deaths in that apartment. All the deaths come in threes; Oliver was one, who will be the other two? It’ll calm down after two more people die.Alex and Hedy go looking for Reena, the actual owner of the apartment. She may be letting Alex and Ben take the hit for the deaths so she can move back in. Reena lives in a storage locker and has a sad story for them. She’s very sympathetic until she starts getting racist and homophobic. When she gets al

Oct 4, 202439 min