GIRLBLOGGER: THE PODCAST

Long episode! What can I say, I just love to talk about drama. Specifically, The Drama (2026) is a film I have a lot to say about. Would you call off a wedding after learning your soon-to-be spouse almost committed an unforgivable act of terror? Well, this film teaches us is that maybe you should. After that mess, I get into the unexpected and polarizing career pivot for Kylie Jenner's hard seltzer brand, Sprinter. Booze is out, you say? Well then, have a sip of my new wellness water! Next, I dive into my all time favorite show, Love on the Spectrum. Where can I purchase any of Madison's craft jewelry?! Lastly, I talk about the harrowing new Netflix doc series, Trust Me: The False Prophet. Not only do these women need to break free from their abuser, but they also need to break free from these unsightly hairdos! Listen now <3

BIMBOFICATION! The new kink that's sweeping the internet thanks to republican husband, Bryon Noem! Yes, I am sure to break down this saucy, bizarre scandal in granular detail this episode. Honestly though, I hope Bryon owns his sexual oddities and starts an onlyfans to monetize! Become a full Barbie icon, my guy. After that, I switch topics completely and talk about my new favorite surface level (but stunning) documentary by Sofia Coppola about her gay bestie Marc Jacobs. Little me was obsessed with all things Marc, so to see these two on screen talking about Liza Minelli and Bob Fosse really makes me wanna throw on my sequin romper! After all that jazz, I discuss the new album of the summer, WOR$T GIRL IN AMERICA by Slayyyter. We love to see a niche internet girlie have a come up. Also, justice for Brittany Murphy! Listen now <3

Ladies! If you are going to throw a metal bar stool at your man... be damn sure that he is not recording you! This week starts off with a bang as I dive into the entirety of scandal surrounding the very abrupt cancellation of the new season of The Bachelorette. Will Bachelor Nation survive after this?! After that mess, I get into the very anticipated new season of The Comeback. Valerie Cherish feels like part of my soul at this point, so a deep dive episode on all three seasons might be necessary! After that, I discuss the new horror sequel, Ready or Not 2: Here I Come (2026). Was it great? Not really. Although, it is thrilling to see Sarah Michelle Gellar slay gold diggers instead of vampires! Finally, I talk about the incredible "Hannahversary" in which Miley Cyrus pays tribute to the icon Hannah Montana for the 20th anniversary of the show. P.S. There's more Chappell Roan drama! Listen now <3

AHHHH!!! Heidi Klum flopped so hard that it felt like a hate crime! This episode is mostly about the biggest night in Hollywood: The Oscars. Who won, who lost, and who looked like a dirty dish rag. Spoiler alert! Heidi Klum had a devastating fashion faux pas that I go on about for almost 20 minutes. Beyond all the Oscar discourse, I also talk about other important topics, such as Nicole Kidman's orgasmic appreciation for Tweety bird. Lastly, I have to complain about Chappell Roan and her recent Karen-esque behavior in Paris. Listen now! <3

Timothée Chalamet says no one cares about ballet and opera!!! Apparently, such comments will get you an internet beating and the potential loss of an Oscar. Aside from those harsh comments, Daryl Hannah was upset by the harsh portrayal of herself on Ryan Murphy's Love Story and has taken to the New York Times to air her grievances. If someone called me a cokewh0re, and I had never done coke, I'd correct them too! Moving on from that drama, I explain why the movie Slanted (2025) is a flop, despite it having some winning jokes throughout. Turns out, a film about a Chinese girl transforming into a Caucasian prom queen slut was not the masterpiece I had hoped for. To end the pod on a sad note, I tell you all about Christina Applegate's new memoir, You with the Sad Eyes. Apparently, our favorite hot, blonde, funny girl has been through a hell of a lot more than just MS in the decades we've been watching her on screen. Listen now! <3

Trying out something new out this episode - my CLONE will be hosting!!! JK, I do not have a clone, or at least not yet! Firstly, I of course have to address the latest internet conspiracy surrounding Jim Carrey. Can't a guy just get a chemical peel and some filler without being berated with clone accusations?! I mean, c'mon. After that, I take a long time explaining why Scream 7 (2026) is the worst film of the franchise. A POS, if you will. Then, sadly, I have to touch on Britney Spears' latest run-in with the law. We will always be rooting for her like how Tyra was rooting for Tiffany (except fr we are)!!! Then I very briefly talk about the SAG awar- err I mean the "Actor awards", before I finish everything off with my take on Demna's latest collection for Gucci. Listen now! <3

Did anyone die this past week?! Thankfully, no. HOWEVER, Benny Blanco did fart and put his dirty feet on the couch. An abomination that viewers were recently subjected to. Aside from that travesty, viewers have also been tuning into Love Story - the 1000th Ryan Murphy show to drop in the past year. Love Story is very true to the chic, minimalist aesthetics of its two leads, although the real star of the show is Dree Hemingway's portrayal of Daryl Hannah. If we didn't know better, one might assume that this story ends up looking like an episode of Snapped! Next, I have to discuss my newfound appreciation for Hilary Duff and her disregard for PR trained responses. The Duff told us everything we wanted to hear on her recent episode of Call Her Daddy. Yes, Hilary, keep spilling the tea! Finally, I have more to say about Tyra banks and ANTM. This woman and her [hot] ice cream cannot be stopped! Listen now <3Also, donate to Miss J's recovery using the link below!MISS J. ALEXANDER GOFUNDME

WHOOPSIE DAISY YOO-HOO! That lyric hit me like a freight train. You know what else did? Both the new, groundbreaking adaptation of Wuthering Heights (2026) AND the new America's Next Top Model documentary on Netflix. This past week has been a significant one for any of the coquette girlies that might be on an SSRI. This episode, I of course do a deep dive on all of these new, significant pieces of artistic content. Lana sticking her head in an oven in the music video for her new single "White Feather Hawk Tail Deer Hunter" is definitely something I was not expecting. That said, it is something I deeply resonated with. Wuthering Heights (2026) might be getting panned by critics, but I'll tell you exactly why this film is a masterpiece! Finally, Tyra Banks' absurdity has reached new heights when she takes no accountability for the problematic moments of ANTM, however, did we really expect her to? I cover it all. Listen now! <3

BREAKING: Bad Bunny performed at the Super Bowl this year and did not speak English. Did you hear?! WILD. This episode I of course give my take on the [not so] scandalous scandal regarding this year’s Super Bowl halftime performance and all the hullabaloo that came with it. However, I first have to pay my respects to the great James Van Der Beek aka Dawson Leery who sadly passed away this week. Too much death in 2026! I also touch on the new 200 million dollar music deal Britney Spears made the other day. Did I mention I’ve slept with her manager? Then I of course have to talk about the new rom-dom film Pillion (2025) and how true love transcends kinky BDSM role play. Such a beautiful film. Listen now! <3

"I MUST EXPRESS MYSELF. IF YOU DON'T LET ME, I WILL GO INSANE AND I WILL TAKE YOU WITH ME!!!" This, of course, is a slightly modified line from Beetlejuice (1988) spoken by the late Catherine O'Hara. Yes, unfortunately we have lost another icon. Everyone pay your respects to this fabulous diva by watching one of her many great works in both film and television. She deserves it! In other, slightly more uplifting news, the Grammys happened. Well... Addison did not win :( . At least we got to see Chappell Roan flashing her tits on the red carpet! She really ate up all those other hoes. Most importantly, I saw Charli XCX's new film The Moment (2026) and I can confidently tell you that this film IS, in fact, the moment. Also, how about the Kylie Jenner cameo?! She's definitely giving Kim a run for her money with the acting chops! Lastly, I try out a new podcast ending by establishing the "Girlblogger lesson learned of the week". Can you guess what I decided on for this episode? Listen now! <3

THE WORLD IS IN PERIL! Well, at least we have a woman on TikTok to entertain us with her bizarre eating habits. Through the dark times we must always find a bit of light to guide us forward, and for me, that light is a blonde english teacher named Courtney Cook. She eats soup dumplings, she drenches everything in mayo, and she reassures us that we're "not stressin'". After I gab about Courtney, I move on to a more disappointing topic. As suspected, Ryan Murphy's new show The Beauty is a flop. However, it was quite fun to see Bella Hadid drink out of a public toilet! Also, in case you didn't hear, Sydney Sweeney might be in legal trouble for vandalizing the Hollywood sign with bras from her new lingerie line, SYRN. I don't know about you, but I'm about as sick of Sydney's tits as I am of the weak water pressure in my off-price bidet. Lastly, I get into the new trailer that just dropped for the upcoming America's Next Top Model documentary on Netflix. Fingers crossed we get to see the full outrageousness of Tyra's crazy! Listen now <3

I DO NOT WANT TO RECONCILE WITH MY FAMILY!!! That's what I texted my family group chat after they criticized my Ambrosia salad on Christmas. Similarly, the son of our queen Victoria Beckham has also severed ties with his family. The majority of this episode is all about the current drama between Brooklyn Beckham and his fam. There's so much to cover! Like how his wife Nicola tried to unalive her nanny. After that drama, I move on to the gay spectacle happening with the cast of Queer Eye. Karamo really said "I HATE YOU ALL" and dipped. Lastly, I have to touch on the recently released text conversations between Blake Lively and Taylor Swift. Spoiler alert: they're not that interesting, but I do respect Taylor for being cvnty via text. Listen now! <3

Jennifer Lopez looks like sh!t and Julia Roberts spewed hate during her award presentation! Well, not exactly, but both of those statements are versions of takes I have on this year's Golden Globes. Listen to me share my thoughts on host Nikki Glaser, Ariana Grande's eyebrows, and Paul Thomas Anderson's tendency to flip-flop in catering between gays and straights. After all that noise, I move on to the more peaceful topic of a violent horror film about a rabid chimpanzee. I highly suggest everyone go see the movie Primate (2025) if you want to develop a phobia of monkeys! Then on to more serious things like Mattel's new autistic Barbie. I just ordered one! I cannot wait to play with her fidget spinner and her alternative communication tablet! Lastly, I play some clips of Hilary Duff's raunchy new single, "Roommates". Who knew that Lizzie McGuire could be such a little harlot! Listen now <3

"If you can't dazzle them with brilliance, baffle them with bullsh!t" These are the words we're living by in our year of 2026! Please pray that this year will bring goodness into our world other than a show about gay hockey players. Things were pretty bleak in 2025! Anyway, this episode has a great handful of fun topics. First, I must dive into Bianca Censori's latest endeavors as an on-stage performance artist. Apparently, if you want to put on a show, all you need is five contortionist models to wear masks of your face and then pose as furniture. It's a surefire way to turn heads! Next, I can't help but bring up Nicki Minaj's bizarre and unfortunate new political identity. Does she really think a red hat over a pink wig is going to make the Barbz happy?! Because it has not. Next I discuss the new Josh Safdie film, Marty Supreme (2025). The film is the equivalent to a chicken with it's head cutoff. That said, I very much enjoyed the movie and Timothée did not use a butt double for his spanking scene! Lastly, I have to pick apart the "toxic mom group" article that Ashley Tisdale (French?) insisted on writing for The Cut. Spoiler alert: Ashley is tone-deaf. Listen now! <3

We came to the cottage... and our lives changed forever. This episode me and my gay bff Connor (@connorxbowman) do a deep dive into the best show ever created. I am of course talking about the gay hockey romance sensation that is known as Heated Rivalry. I mention several times in this episode that this show has changed my body chemistry, and I assure you that I'm being completely sincere. That's because not only does this show tantalize us with perfectly sculpted hockey asses, but it also delivers the most powerful love story ever told. That is the love between yearning athletes, and a smoothie barista, as they try to navigate the stigma around homosexual romance. Needless to say, we cannot get enough of this show, so we break down each episode and share every last thought we have to give on this masterpiece. Listen now! <3

What exactly is love? Well, apparently it consists of workplace infidelity, HR violations, language barriers, and confessing your infatuation to your best friend's wife via cue cards. Yes! This episode me and my girl Olivia Krauss (@oliviakrauss) discuss not only the morally corrupt film Love, Actually (2003) but also the timeless classic, Home Alone (1990) which we discover is an equally odd film when analyzed with an ounce of logic. Why exactly do we love this movie about an abandoned 8-year-old that physically abuses home intruders? Regardless, we watch both these films every year. They both bring us Christmas cheer whether we are hate watching or love watching. Merry Christmas! Listen now! <3