Anxious, Secure, or Avoidant? How Your Style Shapes Love with Bev Mitelman Part 1

In this episode of Getting to the Heart, I sit down with Bev Mitelman, Certified Attachment Practitioner and founder of Securely Loved. From the moment Bev and I connected across the miles — she in Toronto, me in Seattle — I knew we were kindred spirits. Our conversation was both eye-opening and deeply affirming of how our earliest experiences shape the way we love, connect, and cope throughout life. Here are some of the highlights from Part I: • Attachment is our blueprint for connection — the way we bonded in childhood continues to show up in love, work, family, and beyond. • Secure Attachment creates balance and safety, while Anxious Attachment often fuels codependency, over-giving, and fear of abandonment. • These patterns aren’t permanent — awareness and consistent practice can shift even long-held ways of relating. • Midlife brings a unique clarity, especially during hormonal shifts that often strip away people-pleasing and call us back to authenticity. • Healing “unworthy wounds” takes daily intention — small, steady steps that reshape how we see ourselves and how we love This conversation is Part I of our two-part series. We covered secure and anxious attachment styles here, and next time Bev and I will continue the journey by diving into dismissive avoidant and fearful avoidant patterns — two styles that are often misunderstood and rarely discussed with the depth they deserve. If you recognized yourself in what we explored today, I invite you to pause and reflect: how might these patterns be shaping your relationships right now? Visit Bev’s website securelyloved.com to take her free attachment quiz, and be sure to join us for Part II, where we’ll go even deeper into reimagining love and connection in midlife and beyond.

Getting to the Heart - Life, Relationships, Divorce · Bev Mitelman, Michele Heffron