Institution of Marriage

Auto-generated transcript:In the name of Allah, the Creator, the Sustainer, the Maintainer, the Protector of the Universe and everything it contains. The God of Abraham, the God of Moses, the God of Jesus, the God of Muhammad. Peace and blessings be upon all of them. The one and only God, the one and only Creator who has no partners, who has no assistants. There is no one like Him. There is no one unto Him. There is none in creation that resemble Him. He is alone in His glory and His majesty. And we send salutations on His Messenger, on His Prophet Muhammad. Peace and blessings be upon him. And we send salutations on all the Messengers, on Abraham, on Moses, on Jesus and all the others. Peace and blessings be upon all of them. Allah Subh'anaHu Wa Ta-A'la, God Almighty said and described the institution of marriage. And He called it one of His signs. And He said in the Surah which is called Ar-Rum in the Qur'an Al-Karib وَمِنْ آيَتِهِ أَنْ خَلَقَ لَكُمْ مِنْ أَنفُسِكُمْ أَزْوَاجًا لِتَسْكُنُوا إِلَيْهَا وَجَعَلَ بَيْنَكُمْ مَوَدَّةً وَرَحْمَةً إِنَّ فِي ذَٰلِكَ لَآيَةٍ لِقَوْمِهِمْ يَتَفَكَّرُونَ He said which means that from among our signs is that we have created for you mates from amongst yourselves so that you may find tranquility with them and we have placed between the two of them مَوَدَّةً وَرَحْمَةً love and mercy. In this there are signs for people who reflect. Allah Subhanahu wa ta'ala, God Almighty, called the marriage one of His signs and He described three qualities of a marriage. The first quality is that marriage is a sign of love. The second quality is that marriage is a sign of love. The third quality is that marriage is a sign of love. The fourth quality is that marriage is a sign of love. The sixth quality that He described was السقون السقون is tranquility. سقون is the absence of movement away from the spouse. سقون is where when the marriage has taken place the spouses, each of them is saying to the other, سقون is where when the marriage has taken place, the spouses, each of them is saying to the other, So, this is an example of peace. the other that in this world for me you are the only one. The eyes, the ears, the attention, the heart, everything of the spouse will not move away from the other. That is Sukhom. Sukhom is tranquility in the marriage home. To create a home together which is a place of tranquility, a place of harmony, a place of peace, a safe harbor into which the ship that goes out into the oceans and which contends with hostile waves and winds can come back in safety into the harbor. That is the marriage home. The marriage home is the home of the spouse. The marriage home is not a boxing ring. The marriage home is not a place for each one to show their superiority over the other. The marriage home is not something where every morning a fight starts and you have to show physically or mentally or emotionally who is boss. That's not a marriage home. A marriage home is a place which does not have conflict in it and where conflicts are resolved. The second quality that Allah SWT, God Almighty mentioned is the quality of love. Love comes out of respect. Love comes when you appreciate the other person. Love is different from physical, sexual desire. That does not require love. Love is more than that. Love comes out of a sense of togetherness that this person is my responsibility. I take responsibility for her and she is taking responsibility for you. And so I care for you. And this love is shown in many, many different ways. It is shown by the giving of gifts. Not necessarily on this particular day, although you better remember that if you know what's good for you. But throughout the year. On the day of the marriage, you must know what's good for you. You just need to know that you are the reason. It's not about the reason. You are the reason. You are the reason. You are the reason. You are the reason. Why did you bring this for me? Because you are you. I don't need an external reason to do something for you. I do it because you are you. Love is to laugh with the person, not laugh at the person. Love is to support the person. Right? Both both when they are right and when they are wrong. Now you might say, well, how do I support the person? When they're wrong? You support the person when they're wrong by telling them that they are wrong. In private, not in public. You don't humiliate them. But in private, you are the person who's going to draw attention to them and say, All right. Now we are alone and what you did out there. No. It doesn't work. What you did out there doesn't work. Yeah, it doesn't work. This doesn't work either. It's natural. What we are doing, and what we are doing, now all we don't care. What we are doing, and what we are doing out there doesn't work. work and this is the reason why it doesn't work we don't behave like this right who's going to tell you the one who loves you the most to correct another person is a sign of affection you care enough to correct otherwise there are a lot of insane people behaving in insane ways it's not your job to correct everybody but you correct people because of the fact that you love them the third quality that allah mentioned is the quality of mercy and mercy is the bedrock mercy is the foundation mercy is the platform on which the software of forgiveness runs without mercy there's no forgiveness sometimes people in marriage counseling sessions they come to me they say no but you said she did that i said that is why you have to forgive if she didn't do it what would be that what would be there to forgive if he didn't not do anything, what are you forgiving? You are forgiving because there is something wrong. Right? Now forgiveness is one quality without which there is no relationship on the face of this earth which can function, including our relationship with God. Our relationship with God, with Allah is based on forgiveness. We say, Ya Allah, forgive me because you have the power to forgive. You don't say, forgive me because I deserve it. No, I don't deserve it. I know I don't deserve it. I do all kinds of stuff. I know I don't deserve it, but I beg you, please forgive me. Don't punish me. And I'm asking you because you are the most forgiving. You are Ghafoor-ur-Raheem. You are the most forgiving, the most merciful. Allah gave this quality in the marriage. So three qualities, tranquility, which is faithfulness, which is fidelity. And number two is Mawaddah, is love. To be expressed. The other person is not a mind reader. Even if they were mind readers, they would still love it if you show it. And number three is forgiveness. Whatever they did, they'll forgive it. Because along with that mistake they may have made on that particular day, before that, there's so many good things that came your way. Sure, you don't deserve that mistake. But you also didn't deserve all the good that came your way. Weigh it up. That mistake is not so bad. And put yourself before Allah and say, when I go before God Almighty, will I have mistakes? That's one thing we can bet on. Of course you will have mistakes. Of course I will have mistakes. Do I want those to be forgiven? You answer that. Show it here because the Prophet Muhammad, peace be upon him, he said, with such mercy you will have. You know that this has been said many times. He said that your Gods will show mercy on youactions for the last three generations. So when God came and gave His blessing to you, that's when you become also His energy, because everything coming. Nothing has a place in this word. He doesn't rule on one side. evil that they know and that they don't know we ask allah to give them beautiful children who will be a credit to them as they are credit to their parents was allah ala nabiyy al-karim