Dopey 534: Abbey Fickley Returns + Rest in Peace Ray the Clammer; Motherhood, Relapse, Internet Backlash… and 40 Years of Clamming, Cocaine, and Redemption
This week on Dopey! DOPEY WOOD IS COMING!!!! SICK EMAILS AND VOICEMAILS! LSD AND MUSHROOMS, RECOVERY AND MORE! Abbey Fickley returns for part two of her wild and heartfelt story. From postpartum benzos and relapsing in sober living… to becoming a sober mom influencer and facing brutal internet backlash, Abbey opens up about parenting, co-parenting boundaries, and why she stopped posting her daughter Myla online. Emotional, raw, and real. Then we pay tribute to n amazing spirit of recovery - the one and only Ray the Clammer, a legend in Long Island recovery died very early Thursday morning.. We play a classic 2023 conversation they had in his car at the Sayville dog park. Ray tells it all: freebasing for days, living in the Port Authority tunnels, the clamming hustle, homelessness, near suicide, 12-step redemption, and ultimately, dying with 30 years sober. REST IN PEACE RAY! THANK YOU ABBEY! ALL TTHAT AND MORE ON A BRAND NEW EPISODE OF THAT GOOD OLD DOPEY SHOW!
Dopey: On the Dark Comedy of Drug Addiction
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Show Notes
Episode Notes!
DOPEYWOOD COMING!
AWESOME EMAILS AND VOICEMAILS!
ABBEY:
Postpartum anxiety and getting prescribed benzos
Her first time using heroin — in sober living
Moving back to Pittsburgh with her dad to get her life together
Building a YouTube following with her daughter Myla
Dealing with fame, trolls, and the dark side of "sober influencer" culture
Why she stopped posting her daughter online
Setting boundaries in co-parenting
The emotional side of recovery, relapse, and internet backlash
Her evolving relationship with recovery, privacy, and motherhood
🦪 Part 2: Ray the Clammer – A Tribute
Growing up on the South Shore, catching clams with his feet
First time freebasing: “My heart exploded. I fell to my knees. It was great.”
Ten years of coke dealing, freebasing, and losing everything
Smoking away all the product, burning bridges, losing his union job
Homeless in NYC, sleeping under Port Authority, working “security” for a pimp named Otis
Suicidal thoughts in the subway tunnels
The moment he didn't jump, and got back on the train to Long Island
Brought home by police as a missing person
Finds NA, relapses, gets honest — and stays sober from 1993 until his death
Devoted to service: rides, hotlines, detox speaking, always showing up
Passed away with 30 years clean — this recording was his goodbye gift to Dopey Nation
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