Deep Listening - Impact beyond words - Oscar Trimboli

Today I'm really lucky. I'm joined by two people, Jennie and Chris and today we're going to explore the topic of listening and autism, a topic. I have no knowledge in and today I'm really excited to learn and listen to Jennie and Chris. It's a unique opportunity because they have generously provided a talk at public conventions on this very topic. And I feel really privileged to explore a world I know nothing about. And yet in my last three weeks of research on this topic, it's opened up a wonderful perspective for me about listening for similarities, listening for differences, and being conscious of your own listening and how that influences others. Listen for Free

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Today's masterclass is all about learning to listen to someone's voice. If you have taken the listening quiz and you are either the interrupting or lost listener – today's discussion is all about how to listen to the range in the speakers voice. It will help you understand when you feel the urge to interrupt – take a moment longer to listen to where the speakers voice is coming from in their body. Perhaps you've read about him in The Washington Post, or heard him speak on Radio. If not there, then you've likely seen Eric Arceneaux on YouTube, where his viral singing technique videos have generated over 30million views. A world-renowned vocal coach, breathwork specialist, and recording artist, Eric Arceneaux has developed a reputation for transforming and saving voices. Whether you need to prepare for a musical or the FIFA Football world cup – professionals call Eric to help them reach their vocal potential What I love about this interview is the range and nuance Eric has for explaining how voice and song are created by humans. Listen for Free

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Michael Grinder has over 40 years of experience training thousands of groups. Known as the pioneer of nonverbal communication, Michael helps executives and educators assess people more accurately and connect with others more deeply. Two well-known experts personally trained Michael in the field of communication: Carl Rogers, the father of humanistic psychology, and Michael's brother, Dr. John Grinder, co-founder of Neuro-Linguistic Programming. Over his career, Michael has written 14 books, which have been translated into 7 languages. The book that caught my attention is The Elusive Obvious the science of non-verbal communication. It outlines Four distinct patterns – visual, auditory, kinaesthetic and breathing. Together with explore these patterns of expression in and storing information. We cover the role of subjects and objects in discussions through the lens of points of focus. Michael and I start off discussing the ways people process and store communications. Malala Yousafzai discusses the importance of education in diffusing terrorism & empowering women. http://www.cc.com/video-clips/a335nz/the-daily-show-with-jon-stewart-malala-yousafzai Dalton Sherman Keynote speech https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=DZcYxuircxw Listen for Free

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Juliana Tafur is an award-winning trilingual filmmaker, producer and director. She owns Orkidea Films and Story Powerhouse, which are devoted to the development and execution of compelling TV and film projects, including LIST(e)N - a feature length documentary which highlights our common humanity amidst the growing polarization in the U.S.A During this discussion Juliana and I explore that listening is the willingness to have your mind changed. Juliana's 90 minute documentary Listen, where two people with different perspectives on abortion, guns and immigration are brought together to listen to each other. Listen carefully as Juliana describes in very careful and thoughtful detail how people show up when they are willing to listen and when they are not. Do you think you interrupt a lot when you listen, most people don't think they interrupt – yet speakers say it's the most frustrating thing about listeners – listen carefully when Juliana describes what interrupting shows up in listening. Finally, great listening environments can be defined – Juliana skilfully and elegantly creates an environment where people can be open to listening Listen for Free

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Marc Brackett is the Founder and Director of the Yale Center for Emotional Intelligence a Professor in the Child Study Center of Yale University. He is the lead developer of RULER, an evidence-based approach to social and emotional learning that has been adopted by nearly 2,000 pre-K through high schools across the United States and in other countries. He is developed a companion application called Mood Meter which I've been using since preparing for this interview As a researcher for over 20 years, Marc has focused on the role of emotions and emotional intelligence in learning, decision making, creativity, relationships, health, and performance. He has published 125 scholarly articles and received numerous awards Most recently he published Permission to Feel: Unlocking the Power of Emotions to Help Our Kids, Ourselves, and Our Society Thrive Marc mission is to educate the world about the value of emotions and the skills associated with using them wisely. "I want everyone to become an emotion scientist", he says. "We need to be curious explorers of our own and others' emotions so they can help us achieve our goals and improve our lives." and then they are carefully listening to then support people in understanding what they might be feeling based on what the speaker shared. Listen for Free

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Daniel has learned to "see" using a form of echolocation. He clicks his tongue and sends out flashes of sound that bounce off surfaces in the environment and return to him, helping him to construct an understanding of the space around him. In a rousing talk, Kish shows how this works – and asks us all to let go of our fear of the dark unknown. His 2015 talk at TED Global has been viewed millions of times Daniel and I did this interview at the end of a sunny California summer day and he asked me if it was ok to do this interview while he took his afternoon walk – he also did the interview via video so it was great to get to know Daniel's cat and neighbourhood. Listen for Free

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Chase Hughes is THE leading military and intelligence behaviour expert creating the most advanced behaviour skills courses and tactics available worldwide: He is the author of the worldwide #1 bestselling book on advanced persuasion, influence and behaviour profiling. ​Chase teaches elite groups, government agencies and police in behaviour science skills including behaviour profiling, nonverbal analysis, deception detection, interrogation, and advanced behavioural investigation. Listen carefully, when Chase discovers that despite over 150 interviews, I ask the question that no one else asks and the only question that MATTERS. Listen for Free

Garth Paine is a composer, scholar and acoustic ecologist. He crosses art-science boundaries with his community embedded work on environmental listening and creative place-making in addition to his environmental musical works and performances. His research drives toward new approaches to acoustic ecology and the exploration of sound as our lived context including the application of virtual reality health Garth's current research centres around the Listen Project, on acoustic ecology project that focuses on field recording and community building. He co-directs the Acoustic Ecology Lab at Arizona State University. He will explain passive listening, active listening, and directed listening AND How Deep Listening nearly cost him, his life Listen for Free

Mona Thompson is an improv performer, teacher, and creative facilitator. She has performed and taught in Norway, Finland, the Netherlands, the United States as well as at Stanford and Harvard, MIT and Stanford. She has co-founded Collective Capital, a change and innovation consultancy that helps organisations become more curious, generous, and resilient using tools from improv and design thinking. Mona is a master of listening beyond the words, beyond the facts and listening to emotions and listening for inferences. Listening for emotions isn't something most of us have been taught. Listening for emotions is another part of listening. Listen for Free

Jenny Taylor is passionate about conscious connection between our breathing and our productivity. A member of the international breathwork foundation, Jenny is an expert teacher and education on the connection between better breathing and a more productive and fulfilled life. Jenny explains the connection between breathing and listening and takes the time to create simple practical exercises that you can do each day to improve your breathing. Jenny reinforces many of the stories and theories from our discussion with James Nestor in Episode 74 Unlock the ancient secrets between listening and breathing. In this very practical discussion Jenny helps me make sense of a big part of my teenage years and the impact of breathing on me. Listen for Free

Today we get the opportunity to listen to a retired FBI Special Agent and Chief of the Counterintelligence Behavioural Analysis Program. Robin has taken his life's work of recruiting spies and broken the art of leadership and relationship building. Robin has crafted his Code of Trust for quick results and maximum success. Author of Sizing People Up: A Veteran FBI Agent's User Manual for Behavior Prediction and It's not all about Me My favourite story about Robin's life as a marine and what that taught him about how he wasn't listening and the consequences on a bombing range. Lets listen to Robin Listen for Free

In this episode I listen to Tracey and Mark -the co-founders of TRUTHPLANE – one of the most compelling global organisations in the field of business communication. Tracey advises the world's top companies and individuals on their biggest questions around communication and body language. Mark Bowden has been voted the #1 Body Language Professional in the world for two years running Tracey and Mark highlight the importance of the host, the chair of the meeting or your role as a participant in the meeting exploring Level Four – Listening FOR their UNSAID Listen for Free

Author, thinker, researcher and a reputation for asking massively difficult questions oh and occasional comedian David Clutterbuck is one of the earliest pioneers of coaching and mentoring. David shares what makes a powerful question, and the importance of being an impatient listener Listen for Free

We breathe 25,000 times a day, but we've lost the ability to breathe correctly. Learn what went wrong, how we fix it, and the enormous difference it makes. James Nestor is an award-winning author, who has written for The New York Times, NPR, Scientific American and many more. James has spent the last few years exploring and performing studies on breathing: it's million-year-old history and how it affects our lives today. You may have heard Oscar Trimboli say, "the deeper you breathe, the deeper you listen." Hear their conversation and discover how breathing and listening are inextricably linked. Learn the difference between mouth breathing and nose breathing. Find out what the deal is with 'focussing on your breath', and how it's the key to listening to yourself. Listen for Free

How do you listen when time is critical? What do medical staff actually listen for? Associate Professor Ginger Locke shares the art and science of how medics think and perform. Learn from her experience in training doctors about empathy, curiosity and the dangers of seeking efficiency. Discover the difference between what doctors say and what patients hear, and how deep listening can make the difference between life and death. Listen for Free

How do you listen in such a way that the speaker better understands themselves? Leadership expert and author, Jennifer Garvey Berger, gives a masterclass in how to listen at Level 5: listening for meaning. Jennifer shares her experiences of shaping conversations through listening, diving deeper than the content of what's being said and revealing what has given rise to the dialogue in the first place. Learn the four ways people listen differently. Learn why everyone you listen to is the most interesting person in the world. Listen for Free

Paul Nadeau is a highly decorated former police detective, hostage negotiator and international peacekeeper. He shares the story of how a terrorist saved his life, and why the cost of not listening can be fatal. Learn how to ask the right questions and build rapport. Paul says that at the core, hostage negotiation and crisis negotiation is listening. Opening a space for them to speak and making people feel heard. Learn how Paul was able to truly connect with a man who terrified his other police colleagues. By asking people to speak and really listening - Paul has learnt that people are more like us than they are different. Listen for Free

Dame Evelyn Glennie is on a quest to teach the world to listen, to themselves and to each other. Evelyn is an internationally renowned percussionist, remarkably despite being deaf since age 12. She shares the story of an encouraging music teacher, who suggested she remove her hearing aids to listen better. Learn about Evelyn's ability to listen with the whole body, and hear her expert insights on conductors and acoustics. Oscar and Evelyn speak about listening to silence the unsaid, and even a silent piece of music. Evelyn advocates that everyone, regardless of background or circumstance can listen. Listen For Free

Which listening villain are you? Once you know, you can't forget it. 86% of people think they are an above average listener. So rather than thinking about how to listen better, it can be more helpful to notice what bad listening looks like. Meet the Four Villains of Listening: Dramatic, Interrupting, Lost and Shrewd. Each of these villains embodies particular bad habits we fall into, which completely derail our listening. Learn about the ways the villains show up, and tips to combat them. Once you know your listening villains, you know what's getting in your way to becoming a deep listener. Tune in to this episode, and take the Listening Quiz at listeningquiz.com Listen For Free

How do employee surveys get in the way of listening? How do you listen in face-to-face situations and at scale, to hundreds or thousands of employees? Oscar speaks with Geoff Ho, a renowned director and behavioural scientist. Geoff has worked in Google's People Analytics team and is now at Rogers, where he helps shape the management strategies for more than 26,000 employees. His award-winning research is used by governments and organisations around the world. How do you listen to what's unsaid, by analysing data? How do you make sure you listen to large groups of people without bias? Learn how to conduct a listening tour that actually works, how to design effective focus groups, and how Google listened to its employees and gave them a pay rise. Geoff maps the process of listening to your employees onto the Five Levels of Listening. Learn how to become a Deep Listener at scale. Listen For Free

How do you create and sustain a good listening habit? James Clear is a world-leading thinker and New York Times Bestselling author in the field of habits and behaviour change. 10 million people per year visit James Clear's website and newsletters, and his book Atomic Habits has sold over 1.5 million copies around the world. James sits down with Oscar to speak about the intersection of habits and listening. Learn about what a habit is made of, and how they work. Listen as James Clear shares how to adopt an identity of a listener with the simple question: 'What would a good listener do?' Listen For Free

Imagine if you had spent your life studying the silent messages you see when somebody is speaking. Susan Constantine is a world authority on interpreting body language and detecting deception. Susan has worked with the US department of defence, federal court judges, law enforcement agencies and many corporations. Author of 'The Complete Idiot's Guide to Body Language' and upcoming book, 'No Bull' - how to tell if someone is lying in seven seconds. Susan shares the common fallacies of reading body language, and why listening is contextual. Learn about the micro-expressions people exhibit, and why they're important in courtrooms. Hear about how Susan's deep knowledge in this field is being built into technology. Learn how to listen beyond the words, and gain an understanding of a speakers' body language. Listen For Free

Do you struggle with your memory when you are listening? Our research says, that your memory is one of the top five reasons why people struggle with their listening. Rather than listening, you are trying to remember the name of the speaker or what they just explained. Dr Boris Konrad is well qualified to discuss this topic as a neuroscientist and a four-time Guinness World Record holder and an eight-time world champion in memory. You will learn practical tips to improve our memory while you listen. Boris demystifies the relationship between your mind and it stores what's being communicated. He shares the techniques he uses to recall the order of an entire deck of cards and how he never forgets someone's name, even when he hasn't met the person yet. Learn how to take notes in the most effective way to retain information, and how to use visual images in your mind to store and recall when you are listening. Listen For Free

What does a world champion sniper, a 6 year old boy and a Swedish pig have in common? In this episode we listen carefully to Christina Bengtsson, who has a TED Talk and book on the Art of Focus. What is focus or lack of focus? What should you do when you notice your attention is distracted or exhausted? What is the of breathing for focus and listening? Learn what to do with internal and external distractions, how to use them as a springboard back to focus. Discover what you can use as your 'autumn leaf'. Listen For Free

Can you listen while you're asleep? Why do we wake up when someone calls our name? And what exactly is the cocktail party problem? In this episode, Oscar speaks with Dr Thomas Andrillon about listening and sleep. Thomas is a research fellow at Monash University, an expert on the brain during sleep. Hear about what the brain can process while we sleep, and what it can teach us for our waking hours. Learn how the brain can listen to multiple things at once, and switch our attention between them when it matters. Learn Thomas's tips to remove distractions, before they even become distracting! Finally, can we make decisions, or even learn while we sleep? Tune in to find out. Listen For Free

We are listening role models for our kids. If our children don't listen to us, we may need to begin with listening to ourselves. In this episode, Oscar speaks with global parenting expert, Justin Coulson. Father to 6 daughters, TED talk speaker and author of 6 books. Justin answers the question, 'How do I get my kids to listen?' A great way to begin an engaged conversation is to start with observation. You can learn about listening by noticing. Learn the importance of eye contact, eye level and how this honours the relationship whilst expressing the desire to communicate. Justin explains that parents may have to stop what we're doing because we miss opportunities to connect with our kids if we never stop. Listen For Free

How good is your multi-tasking? Is it a skill you try to work on? On this episode of Deep Listening, Prof. Stefan van der Stigchel explains what happens when you multi-task, and why it might not actually exist at all. An expert in attention, Stefan shares how to write notes to best retain information and continue listening. He explains what your working memory is, and how distraction cuts your performance in half. Learn how to really pay attention when listening, and how to prepare your environment to minimise distraction. Listen For Free

If you would like early access to the Listening Villain quiz, visit www.listeningquiz.com In less than 20 questions you will get access to the questionaire and more importantly what to do about it

Dr Romie Mushtaq, M.D., ABIHM, is a neurologist whose expertise in Western medicine and Eastern wisdom helps people resolve stress-based illnesses, achieve peak performance, and harness the power of mindful leadership. Dr Romie's discussion with Oscar is a masterclass in Level One Listening - Listening to Yourself. She shares about the role of distraction, breathing and ego in your ability to listen effectively. Dr Romie draws a map from your ears all the way through the different parts of the brain, to help you understand what the journey is like to move from hearing to listening. How do you leave your ego at the door to better listen? Why to breath deeply for 3 minutes, and what to do if you don't have 3 minutes? Learn the answers to these questions and more in this episode with Dr Romie Mushtaq. Listen For Free

Level Five listening is listening for meaning. It's the difference between listening to the speaker, and listening for the speaker. Recreational listening is listening to the speaker - just the words that they're saying. But when you're listening for meaning, you help the speaker to make sense of what they're really thinking. The meaning goes beyond the present conversation, and into the future. What are the consequences? In this episode, Oscar and Nell unlock how to listen for meaning for both individuals and for groups. Learn how to listen for the capital letters, and from real life examples and audience questions. Join us on the final step of the journey, to becoming a Deep Listener. Listen For Free

Listening for the unsaid is Level Four listening. It's the ultimate ninja move of a Deep Listener and it sounds counterintuitive. It's moving your orientation away from what's in it for you, but toward the speaker. Help the speaker understand what they're saying and thinking. Learn how to listen to silence like it's another word in the conversation. Learn how to navigate the labels of 'introvert' and 'extrovert'. Learn how to interpret body language. Tune in and take your listening to this new level; the next step on the journey to becoming a Deep Listener. Listen For Free