Dear Young Married Couple

So little clarity and so much unrest... Such a perfect time to release an episode on grief that is desperately needed in this moment of folks grieving various forms of loss. We interviewed Dr. Chelsea Hall before the globe was in the state of pandemic, but in this episode, you'll see that so much of what Dr. Hall discusses about grief can be applied to what we are all feeling in this season. Whether you recently had unexpected news about the health of a loved one, whether you recently lost a loved one, or whether you are grieving the loss of normalcy in your life, job, and relationships, this episode is for YOU. Dr. Hall gave several book recommendations: A Grief Observed by C.S. Lewis The Problem of Pain by C.S. Lewis Tear Soup: A Recipe for Healing After Loss by Pat Schweibert and Chuck DeKlyen You can contact Dr. Hall at (510) 512-2353 or [email protected] (or on IG: @carpe_veritas) Stay in conversation with us on IG: @dearyoungmarriedcouple or on our website: www.dearyoungmarriedcouple.com P.S. Here are the links to the marriage card decks we talk about in the episode: FOUNDATIONS: https://amzn.to/2RaXF7g SEXPECTATIONS: https://amzn.to/2GbVMRA REALIZATIONS: https://amzn.to/3brNTWh Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

During times of economic uncertainty, there can be a lot of tension around the finances and just talking about it can feel like an argument is about to explode. In this episode, Adrian Hildebrand, Certified Financial Education Instructor, shares some practical tips about discussing the finances as a couple. She tackles debt, budgeting, investments, financial infidelity, joint accounts, spending limits, and managing an economic crisis. Adrian also discusses the COVID-19 pandemic specifically and shares some insights on financial do's and don'ts. She shared a specific resource about what you can do with retirement contributions (401Ks and IRAs) right now with the new CARES act -- here is a FORBES article from March 28th that explains the details. Here are Adrian's Book Recommendations: The Total Money Makeover by Dave Ramsey Your Money, Your Marriage by Cherie and Brian Lowe You can connect with Adrian at www.faithinfinance.org or on IG @faith.in.finance Here's a link to our sponsor, Relate Foundation. (Use our code DYMC for 20% off your assessment!) You can connect with us at: www.dearyoungmarriedcouple.com, e-mail us at hello@dearyoungmarriedcouple, or on IG @dearyoungmarriedcouple. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

This is our very first "ASK" episode! Every now and then, we'll take a few of your questions and answer them here in a short 10-15 minute episode. These three questions were asked quite a few times this past month, so we decided to share some reflections on these topics: How did you know your marriage was ready for a baby? Any advice for the first night? How do I get my spouse to go to counseling? If you're looking for ways to connect with your spouse while quarantined, check out these marriage card decks that we created just for you: FOUNDATIONS: https://amzn.to/2RaXF7g SEXPECTATIONS: https://amzn.to/2GbVMRA REALIZATIONS: https://amzn.to/3brNTWh Stay in conversation with us on IG: @dearyoungmarriedcouple or on our website: www.dearyoungmarriedcouple.com Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

"Isn't it the church's job to teach my children about the Bible?" This is a sentiment that is all-too-often shared by many busy, young married couples throughout North America. Now more than ever, we need to be equipped as parents to pour into the hearts of our children at home. We met Justin Jeter in a hotel lobby when we were doing a marriage seminar in Arkansas last year and he was doing a children's conference in the same town. The more we learned about Justin and Hillary, the more we got excited about connecting with them and their ministry. Justin and Hillary Jeter are the founders of THE RESOLUTE FAMILY, and they're also the Family Pastor and Director of the ECE ministry at their local church. They have such creative ideas about discipling your children at home and they even have free resources available for you! In this podcast, Justin and Hillary share practical tips for us as young, married parents and they give so many examples for you to implement right away (and Lord knows we need more help in the home during the COVID-19 crisis). Here are their book/resource recommendations: Five-Minute Fatherhood Podcast 31 Creative Ways to Build Your Family Team by Jeremy and Kelsey Pryor From Tablet to Table by Leonard Sweet Parenting: 14 Gospel Principles by Paul David Tripp Sticky Faith by Kara E. Powell Usborne Book of Bible Stories Friends with God Story Bible WordSong Scripture Memorization by Denee Varnum Here's a link to our sponsor, Relate Foundation. (Use our code DYMC for 20% off your assessment!) Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

This is an introduction and explanation to the next episode. We wanted to keep the next episode limited to just the track itself with no explanation, in case you wanted to use it as a sleep tool or prayer. In times of uncertainty, it can be helpful to have tools to be able to combat the anxiety and fear that can arise. This is one of many tools that we'll be sharing with you in the coming weeks and it's called MEDITATION. Meditation is a very biblical concept. Here, we talk about how the world has taken the word meditation from us as Christians. Eastern meditation focuses on detachment. Christian meditation focuses on attachment. Eastern meditation is passive. Christian meditation is active. Eastern meditation focuses on union or oneness with God. Christian meditation focuses on communion with God. Eastern meditation focuses on emptying yourself. Christian meditation focuses on filling yourself. If worry has overwhelmed you or anxiety has taken control of your thoughts during the COVID-19 pandemic, we encourage you to listen to the next episode and meditation on the Lord (P.S. See if you can recognize all the scriptures in the meditation). :) You can connect with us at: www.dearyoungmarriedcouple.com , e-mail us at hello@dearyoungmarriedcouple, or on IG @dearyoungmarriedcouple. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

"There were times when I felt like God completely forgot about us. So I had to lean on Alana to tell me that this IS worth praying for." In this episode, we interview Danny and Alana Opdyke, who share their story of conquering the low-lows that your marriage can experience when going through chronic pain. Over the past 20 years of their marriage, Danny has had the following surgeries/procedures: 2002 - Laminectomy / Discectomy of L4/5-LS1 2004 - Anterior & Posterior Lumbar Fusion 2004 - Broken Foot 2006 - Pain Pump #1 2012 - Pain Pump #2 2015 - Snapped Tibia - Rod Placed 2015 - Knee surgery 2016 - Oral Surgeries 2017 - Pain Pump #3 from internal pump failure 2018 - Plantar Plate Rupture/ plate installed / multiple toes fused. Here are the books that Danny + Alana recommend for someone in a chronic health/pain situation: You'll Get Through This by Max Lucado (free on Kindle with Prime) It's Not Supposed to Be This Way by Lysa TerKeurst Here's a link to RELATE (our sponsor). Use code "DYMC" for 20% off. Stay in conversation with us on IG: @dearyoungmarriedcouple or on our website: www.dearyoungmarriedcouple.com P.S. Here are the links to the marriage card decks they talked about in the episode: FOUNDATIONS: https://amzn.to/2RaXF7g SEXPECTATIONS: https://amzn.to/2GbVMRA REALIZATIONS: https://amzn.to/3brNTWh Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

Google searches for “sexless marriage” are 3.5x more common than “unhappy marriage”. So what exactly makes a marriage sexless? There’s no precise definition, though some experts say it’s when a couple has sex less than 10x/year (or about 1x/mo) while others say it has more to do with one spouse wanting sex more than the other and not feeling like they’re having enough sex. Today, our podcast guest is Rev. Jason Carr, a Licensed Marriage and Family Therapist (and pastor) in Beaumont, TX. He says, “I don’t know that I’ve ever counseled with a couple that were on the same page when it comes to the desire for sexuality.” Why? He says, “Sex is the thing that nobody wants to talk about in many church circles. It’s rarely (if ever) addressed in premarital counseling, and when it is, it’s usually the pastor handing the couple a book and saying, ‘Here, good luck,’ and they don’t actually talk about it. 90% of marriages have problems in their sex life and don’t actually talk about it. They might hope it gets better or even pray it gets better, but having the boldness to open up and communicate about it requires an intimate relationship.” All about that today on the #DYMCpodcast You can get in contact with Rev. Jason Carr by going to www.tac.life. The book recommendations he made is "Sheet Music" by Kevin Leman. Stay in conversation with us on IG: @dearyoungmarriedcouple or on our website: www.dearyoungmarriedcouple.com P.S. Here are the links to the marriage card decks we talk about in the episode: FOUNDATIONS: https://amzn.to/2RaXF7g SEXPECTATIONS: https://amzn.to/2GbVMRA REALIZATIONS: https://amzn.to/3brNTWh Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

"Find someone you can glorify God with and someone you can grow with." In this episode, Tovares and Safa Grey of @godlydating101 offer many practical dating tips for both premarital and married couples. Check out their podcast for dating couples by searching "Godly Dating 101" and catch them up Instagram where they offer daily dating advice. Stay in conversation with us on IG: @dearyoungmarriedcouple or on our website: www.dearyoungmarriedcouple.com P.S. Here are the links to the marriage card decks we talk about in the episode: FOUNDATIONS: https://amzn.to/2RaXF7g SEXPECTATIONS: https://amzn.to/2GbVMRA REALIZATIONS: https://amzn.to/3brNTWh Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

People don't wake up and say, "I'm going to have an affair." People usually “slide” into affairs. They think that crossing a boundary will feel like an electrical fence (“Ouch! I don’t ever want to do that again!), but it doesn’t — it often feels good. It can feel liberating because it usually involves feeling heard and understood by someone. It doesn’t even seem like a problem at first. In today’s episode, Lori Pearring, Licensed Marriage and Family Therapist, walks us through very practical steps for affair-proofing your marriage. She also guides us through some affair-recovery principles that she uses in session with couples. Here are the books that Lori references in the interview: Torn Asunder by Dave Carder Torn Asunder Workbook Hold Me Tight: 7 Conversations for Connection by Sue Johnson Created for Connection by Sue Johnson + Kenneth Sanderfer Here's a link to Lori’s website. Stay in conversation with us on IG: @dearyoungmarriedcouple or on our website: www.dearyoungmarriedcouple.com P.S. Here are the links to the marriage card decks we talk about in the episode: FOUNDATIONS: https://amzn.to/2RaXF7g SEXPECTATIONS: https://amzn.to/2GbVMRA REALIZATIONS: https://amzn.to/3brNTWh Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

She blushed as we questioned, “HOW did you make it special when he came home?” and then she responded: “A special meal, special candles, special music...” This was all part of their intention to “have something familiar in the midst of the crazy”, both as a couple and as a family in the military. Today on the podcast, Pastor Robert + Maria Rodriguez, Missionaries to Mexico, talk about their experience in the military for decades, and they give practical tips for couples with this dynamic in their marriage and family. Link in bio or swipe up in our story. We had the privilege of doing a #MissionsForMarriage retreat with the church that this couple pastors in Mexico, and we put pictures of their building in our story today. They did NOT ask us to do this, but we felt the Lord laid it on our hearts to put their account out there for folks to contribute to the building needs for this growing church. Give to their missions efforts here (even if it’s a small amount, it all counts): www.paypal.me/ensenadamxmissions. Book Recommendations from Team Rodriguez: Love and Respect Amor y Respeto The Five Languages Stay in conversation with us on IG: @dearyoungmarriedcouple or on our website: www.dearyoungmarriedcouple.com P.S. Here are the links to the marriage card decks we talk about in the episode: FOUNDATIONS: https://amzn.to/2RaXF7g SEXPECTATIONS: https://amzn.to/2GbVMRA REALIZATIONS: https://amzn.to/3brNTWh Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

You’ll hear a snippet of a story in the very beginning about a broken man (warning: it’s about a man who pulled the trigger with a gun held to his head)... and then the beauty that came from this brokenness when he committed to intentionally building his marriage and family. In this episode, Pastor Paul and Lori Elder (pastor in Pueblo, CO for 30+ years) teach us practical tips about building traditions in our marriage and family — whether we come from intact families or from broken homes. The “I love your more than ______” is a tradition that Pastor Paul and Lori Elder have done in their marriage and with their kids for decades. “Our intention with that was to instill the idea that love for one another is greater than things,” he said. And then she added, “You can make anything a tradition — just something that you repeat, that the kids know is going to happen.” From ways to read Chinese fortune cookies to Totino pizzas in a mini oven, to the very traditions that bind us together as a church family — this episode is chock-full of practical traditions and spiritual insight for your marriage and family. Book Recommendations from Team Elder: Creative Correction The Book of Virtues Zeal without Burnout "Mary Did You Know" - by the Elder Family Stay in conversation with us on IG: @dearyoungmarriedcouple or on our website: www.dearyoungmarriedcouple.com P.S. Here are the links to the marriage card decks we talk about in the episode: FOUNDATIONS: https://amzn.to/2RaXF7g SEXPECTATIONS: https://amzn.to/2GbVMRA REALIZATIONS: https://amzn.to/3brNTWh Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

“People have these rich fantasy sex lives with decades of porn use and then they go into marriage and they’re thinking it’s going to be a different kind of sex life. It creates an incredible conflict and it’s difficult to just “get over”. Some people think that if they just kick the habit then they can get on with a healthy marriage and it doesn’t work that way at all.” - Dr. DeVon Mills Today’s podcast episode is about HEALING YOUR MARRIAGE FROM PORN. Did you know that about 75% of millennial Christians (regardless of gender) are viewing pornography on a weekly basis? In this episode, we interview Dr. DeVon Mills about the effects of pornography on the marriage, but also how to heal from it. There IS hope. Send this podcast link to somebody who can use it as a resource. More importantly, pray for that person, that couple, that spouse, or even yourself. Pray that God would equip you with tools to take action in a healthy direction. Stay in conversation with us on IG: @dearyoungmarriedcouple or on our website: www.dearyoungmarriedcouple.com P.S. Here are the links to the marriage card decks we talk about in the episode: FOUNDATIONS: https://amzn.to/2RaXF7g SEXPECTATIONS: https://amzn.to/2GbVMRA Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

We had the privilege of interviewing Pastor Myles and Sheila Young, who also happen to be our very own pastor here at The Rock Church in Elk Grove, CA. Having them as our first podcast guest was very intentional - they have supported us from teenhood through present day and have guided us through each decision we've made for the Dear Young Married Couple ministry. We look up to them for how they support each other's dreams - but they don't stop with simply supporting each other - they are also committed to their own journey of personal growth. We've seen many marriages in which one spouse is committed to growing in their ministry, education, physical fitness, or career, while the other spouse supports, but stays personally stagnant. In this episode, we ask them practical questions about how to grow WITH your spouse and not just support his/her dreams. Pastor Myles Young is currently finishing his doctoral degree in Missiology and Sis. Sheila Young is currently finishing her doctoral degree in Economics, Leadership and Development. Book Recommendations from Team Young: DiscipleShift Leading Change Atomic Habits A People's History of the United States Lift Up Thy Voice Stay in conversation with us on IG: @dearyoungmarriedcouple or on our website: www.dearyoungmarriedcouple.com P.S. Here are the links to the marriage card decks we talk about in the episode: FOUNDATIONS: https://amzn.to/2RaXF7g SEXPECTATIONS: https://amzn.to/2GbVMRA Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices