Breaker Whiskey

To SolitudePlease visit breakerwhiskey.com for more information or to send a message to Whiskey's radio. Breaker Whiskey is an Atypical Artists production created by Lauren Shippen.If you'd like to support the show, please visit atypicalartists.co/support.If you'd like to send Whiskey a message, click here.----[Transcript]Breaker, breaker. This is Whiskey calling up for solitude. I like that: the in between. It's better than anything I've ever called whatever this is in my head, and it really does describe what it feels like just existing in this in-between. In between versions of my life, in between past and future, in between a different state line every other month.Because you're right. I do think about it. I think about what my life would be like if I hadn't met Harry, if I hadn't met Pete, if I hadn't made the choices that I made. I know Harry thinks about it, too.We don't talk about it as much as we should. Maybe. I mean, other than the few blow up fights we've had, we've never. Well, we just don't really talk about it so much anymore. And maybe that's because it hasn't been that big of a problem since we reunited. We haven't heard or seen a peep from Junior and whatever change Birdie was warning about. I mean, there's someone else here, something else here it hasn't reached us yet. We do keep moving to avoid anything reaching us, but I don't know. It's a big country.I do think that we could stay in one place for a little while and probably avoid whatever is coming our way. Then again, maybe I don't want to settle down into a particular place. I get what you mean, Solitude. I am also bored a lot of the time and being on the move, constantly setting up a new home base, driving, trying to find more fuel. All of that stuff keeps me busy, keeps us busy. I do think Harry would be satisfied just reading every book that's ever been published, but I need action.I miss talking to everybody every day too. It was easier, I guess, when I wasn't with Harry. Now I have someone who talks back in the moment that I'm actually talking to them. And well, I like trading radio messages back and forth, but I also I don't have that much to say. There haven't been that many seismic changes after a year full of them.I think since Birdie explained what they could, I've been more at peace with the in-between. I don't really understand how it works, why it works the way that it does, or if there is any way for us to get back or get somewhere else, because I'm not even sure that there's a back to get to. Despite all of that, I'm still. I don't know, I'm just a little bit at peace, I guess. I hope you find that too. Peace. Not just solitude.See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

Please visit breakerwhiskey.com for more information or to send a message to Whiskey's radio. Breaker Whiskey is an Atypical Artists production created by Lauren Shippen.If you'd like to support the show, please visit atypicalartists.co/support.If you'd like to send Whiskey a message, click here.----[Transcript]Do you ever wonder what your life was leading up to had you not been transported to the In-Between? Or if you hadn't met a specific person that that would've kept you from getting trapped here? Like, do you think if you never met Harry, or the rest of your group, or Juniors Dad wasn't on shift that day, that you would've ended up here? Or that you were always destined to be in this place?I think I was always supposed to be here. I've always felt out of place. More comfortable by myself. Aimless with school and jobs and relationships. And now here I am. In The In-between. Alone with myself, my thoughts, and my stories. I love stories. But, well, I'm sure you know this, they can get kind of,, stale, after a while.I've been stuck here for a few years and at first, it was like Heaven. No people, but everything still moved around like there were people here. That's why I call it the in-between by the way. It's kind of just like everyone else in invisible and I'm the only one visible? Or maybe it's the other way around. Pretty sure my town is convinced it's been infested with ghosts. It was nice at first, if a bit of a dangerous learning curve. I got to read my backlog of books, play games, listen to the radio, though the signal is terrible on this side of the veil. But it started to get boring. And then I heard your voice, which was MUCH clearer. It helped. Hearing you travel around was like my own little serial story. I miss the daily updates. I've gotten off track. Sorry, it's like I said. I'm very bored. Anyway besides the boredom due to a lack of socialization, I feel like I'm more free than I ever was. Free to learn, to read, to write, to ponder. And I've been thinking about the events that led me here lately. If I could've avoided it or if this was always to be my destination. I'm not sure what my answer would be. What do you think? Oh! Uh, you can call me Solitude. I was gonna go with a pun or something like SoliDUDE but,, I'm feeling introspective lately so I'll save the silly for later. Solitude, out.See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

To August.Please visit breakerwhiskey.com for more information or to send a message to Whiskey's radio. Breaker Whiskey is an Atypical Artists production created by Lauren Shippen.If you'd like to support the show, please visit atypicalartists.co/support.If you'd like to send Whiskey a message, click here.----[Transcript]This is Whiskey calling out for August. Are you saying that you've been alone since you were a kid? Uh, I don't even know how that's possible. I, I mean, what choices--What kind of circumstance could you have been in to separate a timeline into its own branch? I'm sorry. That's awful. And I'm sorry that you're on another continent. Because maybe, maybe somehow we are part of the same timeline and we could actually see, meet, talk to each other. But how would we get there? I don't know if you heard my broadcast the other week, but the idea of sailing across the ocean terrified me. It's not something I have the training to do or the stomach for. Frankly, too many things can go wrong.I don't know, would it...would it be worth it if it meant there were people on the other side? It sounds like you've been alone for a lot longer than I've been alone. So maybe...maybe people don't solve anything, if they're not the right people. If you're the wrong person. I've been in groups like that before, and it's a rare thing to find what I found. To find a handful of people to whom you belong, with whom you actually like spending time. But all that said, it is still kind of an extraordinary thing that we're alive at the same time. Maybe not in the same place, maybe not exactly, but that we can talk to each other. What a what a wonderful thing to be alive at the same time as someone else's, as anybody else. Human existence is so singular, you know. I mean, sure, maybe aliens do exist, but for all we know, we are the only intelligent life in the universe. And we're such a small blip in the lifetime of our earth, of our galaxy. And so, to get to experience it is this one in a million chance. But at the same time, for a singular as human existence is, we are all experiencing shades of the same thing. I don't know, maybe it's not a comfort to somebody who has felt on the outside their whole lives. I guess...I guess I just want to say you might be on the outside, but you're not alone on the outside.See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

Please visit breakerwhiskey.com for more information or to send a message to Whiskey's radio. Breaker Whiskey is an Atypical Artists production created by Lauren Shippen.If you'd like to support the show, please visit atypicalartists.co/support.If you'd like to send Whiskey a message, click here.----[Transcript]Hello, Whiskey. I'd like to tell you a story. Nothing more, nothing less. You don't have to respond. You don't even have to listen. It's just nice to talk to someone after... There was once a child. For they can't have been much more than that. Maybe ten or eleven years old. And this child lived in a sleepy little village in the English countryside. The child always knew they were different to anyone else in the village, but they didn't know why or how. They didn't understand their people, and in turn, their people did not understand them. But it was all right. You don't need to understand one another to teach one to read or to help out on a farm. And all was well. But the child always felt left out, misunderstood as they were. They hated their people. But hate is such a strong word, I hear you cry. They hated their people with a burning passion. It ate them up inside. Tearing out a hollow in their chest. till they were completely and utterly empty. I wish I was alone, they would cry. I wish you would all just leave me be. So I could be alone. And one day when they woke up, their wish had come true. It was not what they had wanted. They screamed and they cried. And then they fell to their knees and laughed and laughed and laughed.I have been alone for years. I walk a lot nowadays. Always in the same few square miles, my dear. I have a little hoard of books and music and radios and televisions. A lot of it doesn't work anymore. Of course, sometimes when I travel outside of my area, I will hear a voice and I will think that maybe, just maybe, this time I am not alone. And that is how I found you. Whiskey. I realized you were alive and at the same time as me, you were alive. But then I realized you are not even on the same continent as me. And so I remain alone. My name is August, by the way. Nice to meet you.See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

To Rusty.Please visit breakerwhiskey.com for more information or to send a message to Whiskey's radio. Breaker Whiskey is an Atypical Artists production created by Lauren Shippen.If you'd like to support the show, please visit atypicalartists.co/support.If you'd like to send Whiskey a message, click here.----[Transcript]Jesus Christ Rusty, tear gas? Sounds like you're having a much harder go of it than I ever had. I'm sorry that you're doing it alone. It does make it easier having Harry and I'm taking care of her as best as I can. She- she liked that part of your broadcast. She happened to be standing over my shoulder as it came in. And she was very pleased to hear you say that. She likes when I'm responsible for her in some way, I think makes her feel loved, which. Yeah. She is. You know, honestly, it never occurred to me to take a boat anywhere. Maybe because I haven't really spent much time on them before. Maybe because the thought of being lost at sea is so much worse than any version of my life over this past year. Decade, really. Here alone, at the end of the world, or nearly alone. So I hope if you do take that boat somewhere, that it's somewhere close and safe, and that you have clear weather your whole way. That old sailor saying? Francis used to say it...um...something about the sunset. Red sky at night. Sailors delight. Red sky in morning, sailor. Take warning. I have no idea if that's anything. I don't know, maybe check the Anarchist Cookbook, see if they have anything to say about the sky and what importance for sailing the seas it holds. But if I find myself wanting to seek out some islands, I'll definitely check to see if your book is there. Who knows, maybe one of your other selves will find it. Now that you know you've been broadcasting to my frequency, it's very possible that they've heard you just like you heard them. It must be so strange. I might not be alone because I have Harry. But. You're not alone in a way that I think very, very few people can understand. All of you. Rusty. Scarlet. Red. You know that there are other yous out there living lives and speaking to one another about those lives. I mean, that's a kind of community that I can't even fathom. Once again, I think about what the hell my other selves are doing that they're not hearing any of these transmissions. And then I think, well, maybe they never really got into the radio. Maybe they had no reason to. Maybe they're all, I don't know, maybe they're all sitting in prisons somewhere. See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

Please visit breakerwhiskey.com for more information or to send a message to Whiskey's radio. Breaker Whiskey is an Atypical Artists production created by Lauren Shippen.If you'd like to support the show, please visit atypicalartists.co/support.If you'd like to send Whiskey a message, click here.----[Transcript]Hello, Whiskey. Sorry if my voice sounds rough. Haven’t used it in a while, I’m a little Rusty. Figure it’s close enough for you to recognize it, anyway. You know the drill by now, and I don’t have time to waste. Can’t stay in one place too long, or they’ll find me. I hear you’re dealing with some of that, yourself. I’m sorry to hear that. Not surprised, just sorry. I heard the broadcasts of my other selves, through your channel. I think Rosy and I followed a similar path in our lives – mine just seems to have gone in a different direction. Out of the bunker and into Black Forest. Lakewood. Santa Rosa. A hundred places that start with ‘Fort’. I know Rosy painted a rather… rosy picture of finding other people, but the truth of it is that not everyone is lucky like that. Most of us, the people we run into aren’t going to cozy up to us and keep us warm. More of them would sooner set you on fire. And you can hope for the former, but you need to prepare for the latter. There’s this book I managed to find – in one of the Fort-Somethings, ironically enough. You should find a copy. Hell, I’d leave you mine if I knew how. It’s called The Anarchist Cookbook. Ignore the parts about politics. There’s no mass uprising happening in either of our worlds. There’s not enough people to be a mass anything. But it has instructions for booby traps, hand-to-hand combat, tear gas… be especially careful with that last one, though. Don’t make my mistake. I know it… it sounds extreme. And maybe for your world it is. In mine it’s just… this is life, now. The world is on fire, and you can either run from it, you can fight it, or you can burn. And for a long time, I thought that this was all there was. All there ever would be. But hearing your broadcasts, hearing you find yourself, find love, find… something more than ash and cinders… it was like a breath of fresh air. So… thank you for that, Whiskey. It’s nice imagining a place where I could take in a lungful of air without choking on it. See a sun that isn’t blood red. Feel rain on my face that doesn’t burn. Or even just… find someone I can trust. I think I could weather the haze and the heat if I had someone with me, the way you do. You take good care of her, Whiskey. Make sure she takes care of you, too. I think I’ll leave you that book, after all. It’s risky, I know. And… it’s possible that it won’t even be there in your world, but… maybe. If you want it, head south, to just before the border. Well… where a border used to be. You’ll find a set of barrier islands, along the coast. My truck is there, along one of the side streets. I’ll leave the book in the glove box. I’ve found a boat – a working one, and I’m going to try to take it somewhere, instead. I don’t know where I’ll end up, but it’s gotta be better than here.See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

Please visit breakerwhiskey.com for more information or to send a message to Whiskey's radio. Breaker Whiskey is an Atypical Artists production created by Lauren Shippen.If you'd like to support the show, please visit atypicalartists.co/support.If you'd like to send Whiskey a message, click here.--[Transcript]We are all one, and love is the universe! Time is an illusion, and even if you are in a different timeline I am sending you the biggest HUG!That's a morse code message that came this morning and, um, well...I really needed that, so. Thank you.See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

To Lora.Please visit breakerwhiskey.com for more information or to send a message to Whiskey's radio. Breaker Whiskey is an Atypical Artists production created by Lauren Shippen.If you'd like to support the show, please visit atypicalartists.co/support.If you'd like to send Whiskey a message, click here.--[TRANSCRIPT]To my potential Grand Canyon road tripper: I sure hope it still exists because the implications of the Grand Canyon just not existing anymore for some reason are terrifying. So, you know, keep me posted. I would say sorry to hear that the government isn't really working where you are, but if there's one thing I like about this world, it's that there's no government. I mean, there's no conflict really, other than me and Harry squabbling over things day to day. But still, I was never a huge fan. But if you've been listening to me for a while, then you know that that's the case. You know that I was never one to, um, avoid breaking the law. There are definitely government agencies that I was more afraid of than others back in the world, but the FCC definitely was not one of them. Not that I ever had any reason to encounter them, but a bunch of pencil pushers, I imagine. So let me be the devil on your shoulder saying to just break those rules. Whatever it is that's holding you back, it doesn't sound like anybody's going to get in your way now. And life is short, so you might as well take whatever risk you want to while you can.See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

Please visit breakerwhiskey.com for more information or to send a message to Whiskey's radio. Breaker Whiskey is an Atypical Artists production created by Lauren Shippen.If you'd like to support the show, please visit atypicalartists.co/support.If you'd like to send Whiskey a message, click here.-- [TRANSCRIPT]Hi Whiskey, hope you and Harry are doing well out there, wherever you are. I never thought this was how getting my radio license back in my college days would come in handy. I didn't really use it much before because I was always scared of accidentally breaking some FCC rule and getting chased down by the government. Of course, there isn't really much of a government to enforce anything now so... here I am. I'm sure they had better things to do than go after a college student anyway, but I've always been one to avoid jumping into things without first being reasonably certain of the outcome. I often wonder how much I've missed out on because of that: the things I could have done, places I could've seen, people I could have talked to. What does alternate timeline me look like? We can't change the past and I don't want to, but that doesn't stop us from wondering, does it? I'm kind of inspired by your trip to try out a bit of travel myself though. I've never gone on a solo road trip anywhere, but from the transmissions I caught the Grand Canyon sounded nice. And I'm pretty sure it still exists in this timeline, so maybe that'd a be a good first stop.See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

To Neptune. Please visit breakerwhiskey.com for more information or to send a message to Whiskey's radio. Breaker Whiskey is an Atypical Artists production created by Lauren Shippen.If you'd like to support the show, please visit atypicalartists.co/support.If you'd like to send Whiskey a message, click here.--[TRANSCRIPT]Hey, Neptune - I need so much more information. What do you mean we got to almost every planet? What do you mean, everybody vanished? What do you- what do you mean that you're away from Earth? Are you- are you radioing from another planet? Are you on drugs? I mean, I want to believe that we are telling me is real. But I need so much more detail. But even if you're just somebody having a laugh at me, I know that tonight I'm going to be looking up at the stars and wondering if somebody is out there, like, truly out there. I mean, can you imagine being able to look out at the sky and knowing that there are people above your head? That would be...I hope that there is a timeline out there in which that happens. I hope that that happens in the future, I hope- I just hope we get out there. How extraordinary that would be. So please, if you're not messing around with me, tell me more.See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

Please visit breakerwhiskey.com for more information or to send a message to Whiskey's radio. Breaker Whiskey is an Atypical Artists production created by Lauren Shippen.If you'd like to support the show, please visit atypicalartists.co/support.If you'd like to send Whiskey a message, click here.--[TRANSCRIPT]Dear Whiskey,You were wondering once what humanity could accomplish had they more time to explore the stars. Well, I know. We got to all the planets in the solar system, well almost all of them. On the last trip everyone vanished, now I’m in perpetual motion, forever getting farther from Earth.You can call me by the one planet I never got to see, Neptune.See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

Breaker Whiskey is an Atypical Artists production created by Lauren Shippen.If you'd like to support the show, please visit atypicalartists.co/support.If you'd like to send Whiskey a message, click here.--[TRANSCRIPT]Gratitude. What a. ..what a difficult word. I'm having one of those days where it's a little bit hard to be grateful to be where I am, to be alive in this empty, endless existence. I keep thinking back to what Birdie said, what I think Birdie said, and how maybe there's a way to fix this, to get out of this, to get back, to make the right decision to to merge things. And there's just too many possibilities. There's too many roads to take that could be right. And I could spend the rest of eternity trying to find the right one. And I just, I don't know that I have the energy. But what you said, that idea that maybe someone else did something to give you the universe that you live in now, the one that's good and happy and full of people that you love. That's comforting. So thank you. And I, I hope whatever universe I left, whatever branching timeline I left behind in my wake, I hope it's good for someone.See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

Breaker Whiskey is an Atypical Artists production created by Lauren Shippen.If you'd like to support the show, please visit atypicalartists.co/support.If you'd like to send Whiskey a message, click here.--[TRANSCRIPT]Got another morse code message so if this is you, I hope I translated it right. Though, by this point, I think I've got it down."Although this political and social timeline is bashing the guardrails, threatening to jump the tracks at every moment....This timeline for me personally is better than I deserve. I'm not certain whether it's my wife, my kids, my broader family, or good friends - but someone has earned a forked instance of this universe that brings me joy on the regular, and for which I experience tremendous gratitude."See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

Breaker Whiskey is an Atypical Artists production created by Lauren Shippen.If you'd like to support the show, please visit atypicalartists.co/support.If you'd like to send Whiskey a message, click here.--[TRANSCRIPT]Hey, Rosy. God, I can't believe how many of you there are out there. And how many of you have found my frequency enough to hear me, to hear each other, to respond? It makes me wonder, what is she doing? You know, what is my other self doing as she's not reaching out? Other selves, whatever. I mean, maybe this is the only universe in which I have a CB radio at all, but I doubt that. I'm sorry it's so cold where you are and that your body doesn't like it. But I have to say I'm jealous. Even if you're cold and hungry and snap at each other, I do want other people still. Where we are now is warm, maybe a little bit too warm, but I think it should cool down here in the next couple of weeks. We've been here...um, we've been here for a little while, we had..we had a bit of a- a- a scare, um, a couple of- of months ago and- and Well, it made us want to kind of hunker down somewhere that we could defend. Um, and we've been doing that and it's been okay. I mean, it's beautiful here, but. It doesn't really feel that safe. The world in general doesn't feel that safe. And it's not just Junior, either. I mean, he's still out there. Still looking, I think, but... I circled back. Um, that's what happened a couple months ago. I'd left something at one of the places we'd been staying at for about a week and we weren't that far. I figured it wouldn't hurt to Go back and grab it and when I got there someone else had been there. Someone else had clearly been following us. Maybe not enough to catch up to us, but enough to know where we were. I don't know if it's the transmissions or what, but there's someone out there. Whether it's Junior or someone else, I'm a little bit scared to ask. Or to wait. Or to say that I'll meet them somewhere because well, the world just doesn't feel safe.See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

Breaker Whiskey is an Atypical Artists production created by Lauren Shippen.If you'd like to support the show, please visit atypicalartists.co/support.If you'd like to send Whiskey a message, click here.--[TRANSCRIPT]Hello Whiskey. You’re going to get sick of hearing my voice if this keeps up. Or… our voice, I guess? I’m not Red, nor am I Scarlet. Keeping on theme, you can call me Rosy. Not like the flower, but like when your cheeks get rosy in the cold. We don’t have any more roses. Not here, anyway. They’d get smothered under all this snow. I hope it’s warmer where you are. I mean it would have to be, your car wouldn’t work if it was this cold. That’s why we have to walk everywhere. Well, snowshoe. And not… ‘we’. My group does the walking. I stay and mind the fire, while they go out and hunt, forage, chop wood. I get… I think Doc called it ‘Cold-induced… Brontospasms? I don’t think that’s right, but it’s close. My lungs don’t work well in the cold. Which is… inconvenient to say the least. The journey here was… rough. But because of that, it means I’m almost always the one to stay behind and tend to the fire. Plus Walt really doesn’t trust me with an axe with my missing fingers. Frostbite’s a bitch. I don’t mind staying behind. It’s… actually kind of nice, having the place to myself, every now and then. It’s funny, I left an empty bunker six years ago to try and find people, and I succeeded… but there are still some times that I… miss the solitude. We’re all over each other here, have to sleep huddled up for warmth. You always wake up in someone else’s armpit. And they’re loud. The snoring, the way they laugh, the way they argue. We used to listen to your broadcasts when they were more regular, and I think that was the only time of day that everyone was quiet. All listening to you. It was… it was really nice. Those nights didn’t feel as cold. You brought warmth to our little group. I miss that. I know you… you wanted your life to be your own again, to not be married to a radio, I get that. I still miss it, that’s all. Without you, we’ve had to resort to other methods of entertainment, which… well, I don’t know if you’ve ever tried to play Crazy Eights with a few missing digits, but… anyway. Sometimes Xue reads for us, but a lot of the guys don’t have the patience for it. And they get sick of hearing the same stories over and over. We’ve got limited books. It isn’t perfect, here, I won’t lie. We’re cold, and we’re hungry. And we snap at each other a lot. But… we’re other people. And if you have a hunger for that… well, you can always come and find us. I don’t know our exact location, just the rough journey I took here, some of the place names. Erie. Sunflower. Newcastle. Four Corners. Just… keep going north until you find a whole lot of nothing. That’s where I’ll be. Or… I am in my universe, at least. Hopefully if you head there, there’s something in yours, too. Just… remember to pack to your mittens.See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

From PasserineAtypical Artists production created by Lauren Shippen.If you'd like to support the show, please visit atypicalartists.co/support.If you'd like to send Whiskey a message, click here.--[TRANSCRIPT]Hey, Passerine, it's, it's really good to hear from you again. Um, I'm really, really sorry about your loss. Well, I guess you and I have a mutual understanding club going on because I- I get you too. And, uh, thank you for the facts about yourself. I like the way that you described blue. I think I know exactly what color you mean and yeah, that's a good one. And I hope whatever unknown you were heading into is ultimately really, really good. No matter how different it is. And in the spirit of a trade for a trade, um, let's see, something you might not know about me already. I love Charleston Chews. I think they're the best candy. They're simple. They're perfect. They're so big, you know? You're not getting a candy bar that's...you're gonna eat in three bites. I haven't had a Charleston Chew in a while, but I love them. I love the smell of dirt. Like, The soil that you can smell on a farm, that kind of, like, slightly metallic, slightly manure-y smell? Reminds me of driving with the windows down as a kid. And I once got concussed falling out of a tree. And you might think, oh, well, you know, kids climb up trees all the time and get injured. But, um, I was seventeen So, a little bit more embarrassing. But thanks, Passerine, for sharing a bit about you. And I, I hope to hear more from you soon.See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

From PasserineAtypical Artists production created by Lauren Shippen.If you'd like to support the show, please visit atypicalartists.co/support.If you'd like to send Whiskey a message, click here.--[TRANSCRIPT]"Breaker breaker. This is Passerine calling back to Whiskey. You got the name right. I caught your response a little late, honestly just pure luck that I went to check my radio. I couldn't believe it when I heard you reading out my message. Felt a bit like a dream.As someone who's lost people, I know how much apologies mean little. So, I'll just say I get it. For me, I recently lost a family member, and we were going through their clothes, trying to figure out what to keep and what to give away. It's amazing how much of someone you can find in their clothes, the colours they picked out, the brands they stick to. My person, she loved colour and animals. She volunteered with a whole bunch of different organisations and kept the polo shirts from each one. It was wonderful. And it hurt like hell, because I'd see a jacket I remembered her wearing, and I realised she'd never wear it again. She'd never add another patch to her jacket covered in all the places she'd went. And thinking about losing her just makes me think of all the people you stand to lose in life. Made me terrified about all the clothes and possessions I was going to have to go through in my life, all the memories I was going to have to fold and put into a box, like it was that easy,To cut my ramble short, I understand you. And you are always welcome to respond in this way. The darkness is never as warm as you think it will be.You mentioned not knowing things about me, and well, like you, I'm a little cautious about letting big details slip. But, I'm happy to make a little trade, to keep things fair.My favourite colour is blue, specifically the way the ocean looks from a cliff on the beach on a sunny day. I once nearly concussed myself when ice-skating. In just two weeks, I'm upending my whole life and heading off into the unknown. Not a bad unknown, but just a different one. Maybe I'll be able to give you an update on that later. I love the sound of rain, and the waves, the scratch of a pencil when you're writing a story. I'm a writer, which is my only excuse for how long this message will probably be. My hair is short, and no one can agree on whether it's dark blonde or brown. That's all I can think of for now. Thank you for your promise, I'm holding you to it. And I'll keep up my end over here. No more sinking into dark corners for me.By the way, a passerine is actually a category of birds, passerines make up over half of all bird species. Big bird fan over here, but I also picked it as my name because it's the title of a song that wasn't yet released in your timeline.This has been Passerine, out for now."See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

To Kentucky.Atypical Artists production created by Lauren Shippen.If you'd like to support the show, please visit atypicalartists.co/support.If you'd like to send Whiskey a message, click here.--[TRANSCRIPT]You know, I've heard a lot of really strange things listening into this radio. Funny things, sad things, scary things. When you open up your frequency to not only the rest of the world, but Every possible version of that world, well, you know, you're gonna hear some stuff. But I have to say, this bit about Kentucky, Delaware, these states moving... As you drive across the country and not moving with any kind of pattern, but just being in a different place than it was the last time you drove there, I, that is up there in terms of the strangest. I'm not sure I can say that I believe you. It feels rude to say that I don't, but like I said, I hear a lot of really crazy things on these airwaves. And usually you can tell, you know, if somebody's a total crackpot and you've sounded sober. But if you're not, if this is not just highway hypnosis, but Something helped along by some substance that you've taken or are maybe taking regularly? Um, well, you know, just let me know where you're getting it because sounds pretty cool to me.See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

A message from KentuckyAtypical Artists production created by Lauren Shippen.If you'd like to support the show, please visit atypicalartists.co/support.If you'd like to send Whiskey a message, click here.--[TRANSCRIPT]Hey there, Whiskey. Oh, a while ago my partner sent you a message that said, I still don't know where Kentucky is, and, well, you'll be glad to know, but we finally found it. It's beside Delaware. Let me start over. I've been driving these roads since before I was even tall enough to reach the pedals on my dad's big rig, so I knew where Kentucky was supposed to be. I knew where all the states were supposed to be. That they just aren't there anymore. I mean, they're still there, as in they still exist, but they're not where they're supposed to be. It's like... Someone picked up the pieces of the jigsaw puzzle and shoved them all back in different spots. Kentucky was the first one we noticed. I was driving south out of Ohio, and as soon as we crossed the border, What should have been the border between Ohio and Kentucky. We found ourselves instead in Tennessee. Now, I chalked it up to a particularly dramatic case of highway hypnosis, or Up to the fact that the drive through Kentucky is just that unmemorable. But then it kept happening. I'd be going north out of Missouri and find myself in South Dakota. I'd head east out of Utah. And end up in Oregon. South from Michigan? I ended up in Maine. Making a map of the changes was pretty much useless, since the landscape seemed to keep shifting. Now, some things stayed consistent. Oklahoma stayed attached to Kansas, although maybe a little too attached. Took two weeks of driving in every direction before we finally got out. California's still along the coast, and I guess the locals won't give up the beach for anything. I admit in half of Michigan never seems to move, but the Upper Peninsula wanders from time to time. Last month I found it in the middle of Montana. Don't. Asked me how I could tell the difference. And Nebraska? Well, I don't think anybody would notice if Nebraska moved anyway. So we're left to just wander the country, I guess. Kinda like you. Try to keep to a route and track where things are moving. See if there's any pattern. My better half is a knack for these kinds of things, but so far even they're stumped. So we just have to celebrate the small victories, I guess. This is a pretty good one. This morning, we finally found Kentucky. Like I said, it's beside Delaware. Problem is that now we have no idea where the fuck Delaware is.See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

To Breaker Rum.Please visit breakerwhiskey.com for more information or to send a message to Whiskey's radio. Breaker Whiskey is an Atypical Artists production created by Lauren Shippen.If you'd like to support the show, please visit atypicalartists.co/support.If you'd like to send Whiskey a message, click here.--[TRANSCRIPT]Breaker Breaker, this is Whiskey calling out for Breaker Rum. I do see what you did there. Sorry if I, uh, didn't totally read your message right. I think, well, there was some static in the Morse code and... I'm not entirely sure I got everything right. But if you're from England, how the hell did you get here? Unless were you here before? I mean... I guess I'm assuming that you're here because it sounds like you think that the dog that I saw along the highway was your dog, but if that were the case, surely I would have found you in all my looking. It's kind of you to see me as tanned and gorgeous and happy and I guess I'm happy more than I'm not. Happy being relative. To, you know, everything else. I think, on the whole, I am as happy as I can be. Dogs would make me happier, definitely, but barring that, everything else that would ease my life, bring me joy, those things are a little farther out of reach and a lot out of my control, so. If you really do think that the dog I saw was your dog, well, I don't know, should I come back to Kansas, try to find you? And your now three dogs? Seems kind of fruitless, but what else am I gonna do? Either way, I- I'm happy. I'm happy that you found your dog. And that you got some more. I hope the four of you are very happy together. And I, I don't know what you meant about the Birdie stuff. I'm, honestly, I think I'm choosing to ignore it, um, because, well, there could be a lot of people out there, um, named Birdie and you spelled it differently in any case. Yeah, I'm just gonna assume that this whole thing is a weird coincidence, um, so that I don't go crazy trying to chase ghosts, uh, again, because... I, well, I've had enough of that.See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

A message from Breaker Rum.Please visit breakerwhiskey.com for more information or to send a message to Whiskey's radio. Breaker Whiskey is an Atypical Artists production created by Lauren Shippen.If you'd like to support the show, please visit atypicalartists.co/support.If you'd like to send Whiskey a message, click here.--[TRANSCRIPT]Oh my God Whiskey thank you so much...I found my dog because of you. I swear I couldn't survive without him...I'm disabled and he does so much for me then one day he ran after a car - one car in 2 years and Brandy hates the bloke in it on sight and...I wanna go back to England...see if it's the same there...at least I know which berries are safe...mind you my crappy driving isn't an issue here. I only got your messages occasionally and really really staticky but suddenly the radio thing switched itself on loud like you were shouting about The Dog With Purpose and I knew...I knew...and now I can feel I'm living not just surviving especially as Brandy returned to me with 2 youngsters I swear are half wolf....so I'm protected right? Thing is you did something wrong. I didn't. Why do I get the wonky spine and extra pounds and you..you know...took a life and you get to be...I see you as tanned and gorgeous and happy and...but hey I have dogs so I'm the winner yes? Tell Birdy I'm out here. Please. He knows why.I don't know how you do your funny names call me Breaker Rum. See what I did there?See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

To Persephone. Please visit breakerwhiskey.com for more information or to send a message to Whiskey's radio. Breaker Whiskey is an Atypical Artists production created by Lauren Shippen.If you'd like to support the show, please visit atypicalartists.co/support.If you'd like to send Whiskey a message, click here.--[TRANSCRIPT]Hey, Persephone. Um, yeah, sorry I think you missed me by quite a bit. I haven't been in L.A. for almost a year. Is that right? Jesus. More than. God, more than a year. Time really flies when you're driving around the country aimlessly. Time really crawls when you're still trying to navigate a relationship with somebody that you have to make work because they're the only other person in the world. That's not fair. I want to make it work. I, I, I do. I just. I still don't know what to do. I still don't know how to build a future. I don't know if I should be like you and keep searching for answers, keep searching for other people, or if I should just cut my losses, be grateful for what I have, and settle down. Maybe it's not about having a plan. Maybe it's just about finding little moments that you can...We, um, we found a working jukebox the other day in an old diner and spent, like, an hour and a half playing every song we could and just dancing. And it was, it felt so good, you know, to hold Harry in my arms like that. To watch her laugh. To hear her sing. To get to spin her around in the middle of a diner. A place I never would have been able to do that. Yeah. But it was also bittersweet because you know, the places where I would have taken her dancing, we had friends there, community, and...I've danced with lots of women at those places, but never someone that I really loved. And I really want to. Um, but, um, yeah, I'm not, I'm not in LA anymore. Um, but if, if you are, um, and you're looking for a working jukebox, there is one in Los Feliz at the, um, oh, that, the, the pie place, um, on Vermont. Yeah, I, so if you... If you're still there and that jukebox is working, tell me because I don't know, maybe that'll be a sign of something. Maybe that'll mean that we can actually find each other or maybe it just means that that jukebox works in every universe. Um, but. Either way, let me know.See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

A message from Persephone. Please visit breakerwhiskey.com for more information or to send a message to Whiskey's radio. Breaker Whiskey is an Atypical Artists production created by Lauren Shippen.If you'd like to support the show, please visit atypicalartists.co/support.If you'd like to send Whiskey a message, click here.--[TRANSCRIPT]Hey Whiskey, this is Pershephone, callin out again on day 42. Since the radio static went silent a couple days ago I think I have even less of a chance of making contact with you. I'm not even getting residual transmissions anymore, which is... Definitely not a confidence booster. I'm still in the city, trying to match your location and send something through, but the probability of you still being here is getting slimmer by the day. The last I heard you were planning on leaving LA, so... Not great. Still no contact with anyone else, verbal or otherwise. I might move on soon, keep the search going. So if you, or literally anything else wants to say hi? Send me a sign. Okay. Signing off.See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

Please visit breakerwhiskey.com for more information or to send a message to Whiskey's radio. Breaker Whiskey is an Atypical Artists production created by Lauren Shippen.If you'd like to support the show, please visit atypicalartists.co/support.--[TRANSCRIPT](breathless) Hi Herm, uh, it's, it's me again. Well, I just wanted to get on the horn and say that, you know, I was thinking about what you said about feeling like a kid when you complain and you know, how I was missing feeling like a kid in any sense and so anyway, um, Harry and I, we, we found some, some sleds at a sporting goods store. And we went sledding. And I can't remember the last time that I just let myself go sailing down a hill without a care in the world and- and no matter the consequence. It was...it was freeing. It was fun. I don't think I've ever seen Harry laugh like that. I don't think I've ever laughed like that. So thank you, Herm, for inspiring me, however inadvertently. And I hope...I hope you find something that makes you feel like a kid in a good way.See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

Please visit breakerwhiskey.com for more information or to send a message to Whiskey's radio. Breaker Whiskey is an Atypical Artists production created by Lauren Shippen.If you'd like to support the show, please visit atypicalartists.co/support.If you'd like to send Whiskey a message, click here.--[TRANSCRIPT]Hi, Scarlet. God, this is trippy. I guess I'm talking to Red, too, because. Well, I don't know what you all can hear of what I'm hearing, but, Red, if you can hear me. A person? Well, a person that sounded just like you reached out and says their name is Scarlet, or that's a pseudonym that they chose because of you. Well, now I don't know who I'm talking to. Two different versions of the same person speaking to me from two distinct universes. Both universes sound tough. And lonely. But universes in which the two of you have taken very different paths, had very different lives and experiences. I think about her all the time. The other me. Well, all of the other me's. What are they doing? What lives are they living? In how many universes are they already dead? In how many universes are there accompanying Harry's keeping all of those Whiskey's company. In how many universes are those Harry's driving all of those Whiskeys completely insane and vice versa? I shouldn't say that. Things have been a little better lately. The arguments fewer and farther between, but...I don't know. Now we're at the point where things are just aimless. We settled into a rhythm. For a while there, you know, in Pennsylvania. And then obviously the year I was gone...well. That was aimless in its own way, but the driving without a destination in mind was kind of the point. But I don't- I don't think we're ready to settle back down. But we need to do something. We can't just keep moving from place to place without any destination in mind or without any purpose. Harry really needs a purpose and we've gotten good at the staying alive bit that that's not going to keep her occupied for long. I'm not going to keep her occupied for long, I- How do you keep a brain active when you only hear one voice? Scarlet, you said that you've only been hearing your own voice for the last seven years, and I can't even imagine what that's like. Just having Harry to talk to - just one other person to talk to - it's not that we've...I haven't gotten sick of her. I worry sometimes that I'm not interesting enough for her, but. I don't know. Even with what we are to each other now, with what we're trying to be to each other, that hunger to find more people...it's still there. I think she feels it too. She doesn't want to admit it because she doesn't want to admit that she spent seven years cooped up in that house with me, begging me not to leave for nothing, but... We can't change the past as much as we might want to. And there's no way of knowing who else might be out there. I'm really glad, Scarlet, to have broken the silence for you, to have brought color into the life of your counterpart and I don't know, maybe brightened some other sense of some other you somewhere, but is that enough? Don't you want to find someone? Have you tried looking--? Sorry. Bad choice of words. I just mean...are you certain that you're alone? Because we weren't. Junior and Donnie have been out there this whole time and...I've tried- I've tried reaching out to Birdie again. I even called out for Fox a few times. You may have heard it. I don't know, but having some kind of guidance, having some kind of direction to go in, it was...well, it was really frustrating, but it was also helpful. And Birdie, they said something had changed, that they couldn't see the path clearly any more, that the timeline we were in was different than the timeline we started in and I-- Nothing's different. Nothing is different and I don't know if I'm terrified of finding out what's changed or if I'm dying to know. What would you do, Scarlet? If you could change your world, press a button saying that things would be different, but you didn't know in which direction, would you do it? Or would you choose to keep things the same even if it's not quite enough? It's still safe. Would that be better?See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

Please visit breakerwhiskey.com for more information or to send a message to Whiskey's radio. Breaker Whiskey is an Atypical Artists production created by Lauren Shippen. If you'd like to support the show, please visit atypicalartists.co/support.If you'd like to send Whiskey a message, click here. --[TRANSCRIPT]Hello, Whiskey. My voice might sound somewhat familiar. And I suppose it is, but at the same time… it really isn’t. You received a message from someone calling themselves ‘Red’, and that’s… there’s no other way to say it, but that’s MY voice. I would know it anywhere. It’s all I’ve heard for these past seven years, except for your transmissions, and the occasional stray advert on the airwaves. And when I first heard it, I honestly thought I was going crazy. Thought maybe I’d sent a transmission without even realizing it. It… wouldn’t be out of the realm of possibility. I mean I do talk to myself, so that’s probably a sign of something, right? But then… this… Red, this other version of me, she started talking about white walls, and painting them, and colour, and rainbows, and that… Well, that made it clear that it wasn’t me. Not unless I’d gone completely crazy.  See… (laughs) ’See’… I’ve never seen the walls in this place. I’ve never seen the walls in any place. I don’t know what shade of green money is. I don’t know what the sun looks like. I can tell you what the heat of it feels like on my skin, or the smell of a five-dollar bill, and I know every single bump and dent and bit of texture on the walls of my home… but I’ve never seen them. I’ve never seen any of them. I’ve been blind my entire life. Or… at least as long as I can remember. I won’t get into the… medical details, it’s not like I was in a position to understand them at the time. An infection, a bad fever, that’s all I really know. I certainly don’t envy my parents for what they went through, let’s just put it that way. So… you couldn’t bring colour back into my life, though I appreciate the sentiment. There’s just never been any there to begin with. I know some people do get lucky – such as that luck is - get to see shapes, or shadows, or pinholes of vision… I wasn’t lucky, I guess. Story of my life. But I am lucky to be here, I suppose. Beats the alternative. And wherever Red is, it sounds like she’s somewhere similar. And… probably pretty lonely. I know that feeling well. The… desolation, the hopelessness. The silence. So… thank you for breaking the silence, at least, Whiskey. I’m very grateful for that. And Red… if you’re out there, somewhere, able to hear this… I don’t even know how you would reach out, or how I would hear it, or if that would… destroy time and space or something, but just… I’m here. I’m here if you need someone. I’ve… become very well-versed in talking to myself. You’re… you used a pseudonym for a reason, and I suppose I should follow suit. Don’t want them tracking me down, after all of this. So… if anyone wants to reach out, whether it’s Whiskey, or Red, or… some other alternate version of me… you can call me Scarlet.See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

Please visit breakerwhiskey.com for more information or to send a message to Whiskey's radio. Breaker Whiskey is an Atypical Artists production created by Lauren Shippen. If you'd like to support the show, please visit atypicalartists.co/support. If you'd like to send Whiskey a message, click here. -- [TRANSCRIPT] Breaker, breaker. This is Whiskey calling out to our dog attack victim. Um, I hope you're okay. I'm sorry that happened. I'm glad that you're already on the journey to heal. And I do wish you a lot of luck. I want to say, I think it's amazing that that was your reaction. To want to turn around and pet the head the bit you. I 've always loved dogs, but at the end of the day, they are just animals that live in our homes. And you're right, what good is a world without them? But...sure, we domesticated dogs over millennia, but they still have sharp teeth. They still have an instinct that I'm not sure it can be entirely bred out. And I'm sorry that you were a victim of that. I would love a dog to curl up with. To take care of. And to understand myself a little bit more, because sometimes I feel a little bit like that. Like there's something in me that can't be bred out, can't be trained out. That when cornered, I'm just a thing with sharp teeth. [click, static] Harry would be the first to tell you that I bite. She's not talking to me at the moment, and for good reason. Um...that snarling, rabid snap of teeth that has always perched just beneath my soft palate came out the other day, and...well, she was in range. [click, static] It was after...well, I was having another one of those dark days. Thinking about Don, just swallowed in grief and guilt. And she wasn't- she wasn't being a pill about it or anything, but she wasn't exactly being comforting and...not that I expect that from her. She's never been great at that. But I think I just needed her to mostly leave me alone if she wasn't going to be comforting. And she wouldn't. And I snapped. I just...I told her it was her fault. It was her fault that I left and found him in the first place. It was her fault that I wasn't there when it happened. And it was her fault that we're in this situation to begin with. Even though I know- I know that it's technically literally the fault of my actions. But still she set us on the path. And that's- [click, static] I'm worried that we're never going to stop having this argument. And that's...you know, in the very foundation of our relationship is having the same argument over and over again, but we've gotten better at it. You know, we've gotten better at fighting with each other. We can hurt more precisely now. Cut deeper with fewer slashes and it's...I wasn't nice about it and she's right to not be talking to me because she lost him, too and we both took actions to protect one another that led us to where we are now, so there's no point in placing blame for Don's death at anyone else's feet other than Junior's. It's his fault. He's the one who did it. But we can't confront him. We can't jail him. We certainly can't kill him. And so we're left with only each other to sling arrows at. [click, static] And I'm tired of it. I'm tired of. Lashing out when I feel cornered. I'm tired of caring about the blame. I'm tired of wanting to try and fix what can't be fixed. But I don't know how to stop any of it. I don't know how to train myself out of those animalistic impulses to tear out someone's throat. And part of me wonders if I did it, if I succeeded and was able to change that part of me so fundamentally, would there be enough of me in what was left? Is a dog still a dog if you remove all of its teeth?See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

Please visit breakerwhiskey.com for more information or to send a message to Whiskey's radio. Breaker Whiskey is an Atypical Artists production created by Lauren Shippen. If you'd like to support the show, please visit atypicalartists.co/support. If you'd like to send Whiskey a message, click here. -- [TRANSCRIPT] Another message from another person out there in the black. You said: I thought it was so sad that you only saw one dog on you journey. What good is a world without dogs? Then last weekend I was shocked and heartbroken by being attacked by a large dog that the owner had said was friendly and loved everyone (owner is shocked and heartbroken, too). So now I'm on a journey to heal, trust, and learn more about that which I thought I loved...just like Whiskey. It'll be a somewhat lonely journey, like hers, and filled with ALL of the emotions. I'm hoping it ends with belly rubs, chewed furniture legs, piddle accidents, full vacuum tanks, five am wake-ups, and an unshakable bond. Wish me luck.See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

Please visit breakerwhiskey.com for more information or to send a message to Whiskey's radio. Breaker Whiskey is an Atypical Artists production created by Lauren Shippen. If you'd like to support the show, please visit atypicalartists.co/support. If you'd like to send Whiskey a message, click here. -- [TRANSCRIPT] Breaker, breaker, this is Whiskey calling out for Herm. Hi, Herm. It's good to meet you. Good to hear from you. Good to hear from anyone, really. We've left the place that we were--coming down the mountain--and we've been moving around a little. So I haven't been on the radio as much as I would like. I'm also a little unsure how far my radio is reaching. I had the benefit of all of Birdie's equipment up on the mountain. And now, I mean, I think I think I was able to jerry rig something that will work pretty much like Birdie's set up worked, but I don't actually know for certain. I'm hoping...I'm hoping we can go back in the spring, but it was just...it would have been dangerous, foolish to stay up there throughout the winter. I mean, it was freezing by the time we left. But anyway, Herm, your timeline. Sounds interesting, this fresh start that you're describing, the fact that you're with people but they don't know who you are. They don't know that you've flipped into a different version of the world. Color me intrigued. Is this how all of you have felt whenever I've alluded to something without actually giving much information about it? It's interesting and also frustrating to have just some of the information. I think--I think you're probably right. That I wouldn't have shared the information that I shared if I weren't in the circumstance that I'm in. But I don't regret it. Not just because it allowed me to say a bunch of stuff to Harry that I don't think I would have been able to say to her face and...to maybe say some things to...to Billings' son. If he was listening. If any of that means anything. It's not just the freedom of getting to speak to people that I know or people that I have something to say to specifically. I don't regret it because there's something freeing about all of it. There's something to be said for having this audio diary of my life of the past year and change of everything that I've been through. And there's something nice about people reaching out their voices to me as if they were already friends. The fact that I can mean anything to anybody, any stranger is...I mean...humbling. Just like you're experiencing. And it's surreal, but it makes it easier. It makes living in this big, empty world easier. Hearing from...from all of you. Some of you are like me. You're alone where you are. But a lot of you-- you're in the timelines that I guess are a bit closer to the one that you left. And I wonder if there are other people out there who don't even realize that they've slipped into a different timeline? I don't know which would be worse, right? I don't know if those people feel that something is off, that something isn't quite right. If it's like the feeling of worrying that you left your stove on, but not being able to go back and check. I don't know if I could live with that feeling every day in my life. Is it better to live in a world where I so obviously don't belong? Because. At least I know it. It must be lonely being the only person who knows that you're in a different place. I mean, that's what I'm assuming, based on what you said, but. Yeah. It must be lonely, especially if you have friends, but they're not the ones that you chose. I like your cats' names. Mimzi and JubJub are very good names for cats. I never read the Jabberwocky, but that's an Alice in Wonderland thing, right? Lewis Carroll. I think Harry would understand you, though, wanting to have your books. But it's funny. I never really gave much thought these last seven years about who I wish I'd been stuck with. I guess because as much as it was agony so much of the time, I was with the person that I would have chosen. I don't...I haven't told her that. You know? I mean, things have been things have been good and getting better all the time, but. There's still that sense that while we're the only two people on Earth, I mean, not actually, but in every way that counts, we're the only two people on earth. So. It's good that we can tolerate each other. It's good that we can express these emotions that we have for each other now, but...I don't know if acknowledging that and being what we are now, I don't I don't know if that counts as telling her that I would have chosen her anyway. That even if we were back in Manhattan, in the life we used to live, I still would have chosen her. I think she knows. She's stopped listening to my transmissions, mostly because she's, you know, near me when I make them. And we only have so many radios traveling with us. It was different back on the mountain, but I should probably tell her, right? It's nice to get to say these things first to you. To have you know me in this way, ev

Please visit breakerwhiskey.com for more information or to send a message to Whiskey's radio. Breaker Whiskey is an Atypical Artists production created by Lauren Shippen. If you'd like to support the show, please visit atypicalartists.co/support. If you'd like to send Whiskey a message, click here. -- [TRANSCRIPT] Whiskey. I think if I found out someone had been reading my diary like we've been listening to yours, I'd be terrified. I'd close my eyes and cover my ears and run away to never appear ever again. But I can't think of it like that- intruding. I mean, I can. I'm like 90% sure if your timeline wasn't out to get you, leave you only surviving, you wouldn't share this. Those kinds of things change what's acceptable and what's not. That was an awful start. Sorry. Everyone is just used to how I blabber and blabber that I forget to control it sometimes. So. Hello, Whiskey. This timeline of mine comes with...friends in it. It's not a Harry situation, really. But these aren't the people I would choose for an apocalypse. I wouldn't even choose people at all. I would choose my cats, Mimzy and JubJub. I was young and we had just read Jabberwocky for the poetry unit in class, and suddenly there were cats for me to name that day when I got home. And, anyways, Mimsy and JubJub have stupid names, but they're who I would choose. And books. I would choose books. I had so many on my shelves that I was planning to read. There's no going back, though. I mean, the only reason I have my cats is because they needed a checkup. Did not happen by the by. That day, it went so weird so fast. It's weird here because nobody knows about me. I got a restart I never wanted, and I can't tell anybody anything. And I miss Arthur and...oh, geez. So I'm not alone. We all have to move sometimes. And it feels like a field trip. It's really different from what you experienced. Humbling. Honestly, I kind of feel like a child whenever I complain now. I'm glad you haven't given up, though. I would. Even in this one, I almost did. I... I talked too long. I'm sorry. You don't know, but you mean a lot to me. Because I've been intrusively reading your diary, I suppose, but thank you, Whiskey. I want to hear your voice again soon. I've gotten pretty used to it. You can call me Herm. It's something that...It's familiar. If you hear this Whiskey, or anyone else, I suppose. Callooh Callay. And I'm truly hoping that in front of us will be another good day. Herm out.See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

A response to Passerine. Please visit breakerwhiskey.com for more information or to send a message to Whiskey's radio. Breaker Whiskey is an Atypical Artists production created by Lauren Shippen. If you'd like to support the show, please visit atypicalartists.co/support. If you'd like to send Whiskey a message, click here. ---- [TRANSCRIPT] Breaker breaker. This is whiskey calling out for Passerine. I think-I hope I'm pronouncing that correctly. I read your message out the other day. I don't know if you heard it. I recorded it and then set it to repeat, so hopefully you caught it. I just figured I didn't want to respond to your message and have you not hear it. So I hoped that in reading your message out loud, you would know that I was going to respond and stay tuned in. I don't know. I don't know how any of this works. So anyway, hopefully you are listening and hopefully I said that name correctly, Passerine. I don't know that I'm familiar with that particular type of bird, but I like a theme. You're definitely right in that I have had a year. Sometimes if I think about it too much, it doesn't seem real. It doesn't seem like all of those things happened in a 12 month period, especially when compared to the previous six years. I didn't know life could be that full. Maybe full is the wrong word because obviously I was alone for pretty much all of it. But eventful. And different, right? Just different. That's what I wanted and that's what I got and.. I wanted to not feel so alone and...to your point- talking to you helped me with that feeling. So did Donnie of course. I think about him every single day. It was easier- it was easier to miss him. To miss Richie and Pete and Sylvie and Francis and Martha and everyone else...it was easy to miss them when I thought there was nothing I could do, when I thought that the whole world had just gone mad and any help I could have provided, was way too late. So it hurts worse now. The fact that he's gone. Because I was in a position to help him, to protect him. And I...I failed. [static] And you're right, Passerine. Some days I do want to run away?. And wrap myself in that darkness. And today is one of those days I... Harry said something, made some joke and...I don't know. It just set me off, you know? It was like for a second I could hear the echo of what Don would have said had he been there, because even though it wasn't perfect between all of us, we did, you know, we had a rhythm and and Harry would say something and then Richie would say something, and Don would come in with the punch line, or Harry and Richie would be arguing and Don would mediate and-- or lean over to me and make a joke, just the two of us. And this was one of those moments where there should have been another beat, right? I said something. Harry said something, and then... And he wasn't there. He just - he just wasn't there. I still heard his voice. Still imagined what he would have said. It's not like that's the first time that's happened, right, in the last seven years. Like, Harry and I have had plenty of times where we feel the specter of the people that we lost around us. But it's worse now. [static] Sorry, I didn't mean to make a response to your message about this. I just, I wanted to follow your advice. You know, in feeling that feeling of wanting to run into the darkness, turning here instead to talk to you. I wanted to. I wanted to do that. [static] And I'm glad I could be a reminder for you. I don't know why you feel lonely or if you are literally alone. You didn't tell me much about you, but I'm glad if I eased some of that feeling a little bit. It's weird to think about. It's strange to think about being a part of people's lives when I don't know those people, you know? I mean, that's part of life no matter what, right? he person behind you in line gives you that last quarter that you need to buy coffee and they make your day okay. And you think about them and remember their face and they don't really think about you, right? They did a nice thing and it didn't really cost them much, but it made an impact on you. Things like that happen all the time, happen every day in a place like New York City, where most of the people you're interacting with on any given day are complete strangers that you'll probably never see again. So it's not like I haven't always been a supporting character in people's stories and vice versa. But well, you know, there's the whole being a part of people's lives when those people's lives are occurring in different timelines thing which is still hard to wrap my mind around, but I can't think about too long or my head because I'll wobbly. But, even beyond that, I don't- I don't know what your face looks like. I don't even know your real name. And granted, you don't know my real name, not my full name. But you know my voice. You know things about my life, about my mind, about my heart. And the most wild thing is that all of that means something to you. It means so

Please visit breakerwhiskey.com for more information or to send a message to Whiskey's radio. Breaker Whiskey is an Atypical Artists production created by Lauren Shippen. If you'd like to support the show, please visit atypicalartists.co/support. If you'd like to send Whiskey a message, click here. --- [TRANSCRIPT] Hey Whiskey Call me Passerine. Figured I'd keep with the bird theme that's going on around here. I've been seeing these messages coming through for a while now, but only recently did I take the time to actually sit down and hear. And, wow. What a year you have had. From visiting all of these beautiful places, to the danger of being chased, and all the heartache that Harry has brought you, I'm so glad you chose to call out to us. Some days I wish I had the bravery to do that, to call out to the world and let them know what the inside of my heart looks like. Or, well, to just go up to the people around me and just let them see the outside. I feel like even in a timeline where I'm surrounded with people, the loneliness still gets to me. I don't think you understand just how brave you are, to fight through that loneliness, to tell the world, and Harry, what it is that you feel. I think sometimes true loneliness is being unknown. I don't know how to break out of that. I'm so glad that you aren't alone anymore, even though I know some days you'll probably feel it again. Some days you're going to want to run away into the wilderness, and wrap yourself in the comfort of darkness, and just stay where no one can see or hear you. But I think this past year has shown that you're strong enough to fight that urge. And hey, if you're ever feeling that way, like that loneliness is creeping up on you, you know what to do. Turn on that radio, and tell us everything. We'll be here for you. You're never alone. And I think that's what I'm most grateful for. You've reminded me again that I don't have to be alone. Thanks Whiskey. This has been Passerine, over and out.See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

A response to Red. Please visit breakerwhiskey.com for more information or to send a message to Whiskey's radio. Breaker Whiskey is an Atypical Artists production created by Lauren Shippen. If you'd like to support the show, please visit atypicalartists.co/support. If you'd like to send Whiskey a message, click here. ------ [TRANSCRIPT] Well, hi there, Red. It's good to hear from you. It's strange to hear from you, to talk to you, to talk to anybody, which I know you understand. I haven't been ignoring your transmissions if you really have been sending them for this long. I—I just really haven't heard anything until now. And it’s..hard to think about. You know, when when we first got here and I switched on the radio and turned it to the channel that Birdie told me to, it was such a gift, hearing all those voices. But it was also hard. To think that so many people have been calling out and I just hadn’t… [static] It's something I've struggled with. I did…I needed time to breathe and to figure out what to do next, to figure out things with Harry. And, well, I'm not necessarily any closer on any of those things, but it's been good, I think, to step back a little bit. But I did feel bad. You know, I felt bad leaving people behind just when I finally found them. But then I thought, well, who do I respond to? How do I respond? How do I know that in all of the frequencies and all of the transmissions coming from all these different timelines, how can I make sure I hear from the people that I want to hear from? The next transmission you send, Red, if you send another one, how am I going to be sure that I can can hear it and document it? We've got the radio running all day, every day and are absolutely burning through tape recording it when one of us isn't there. I know we're going to run out at some point and… Harry says I'm not responsible for the world, but hearing you talk what you've been through the last seven years…the loneliness. Missing the sun. I'm glad that I was able to bring some color, some light back into your life, but I just can't help thinking, where are you? Are you here? Are you somewhere else? Are you somewhere that I can get to? Birdie said that things shifted again and I still don't know how. Still haven't seen any sign of what's different. But to think that you and I could merge our disparate timelines. Our isolated little personal purgatories could somehow join up down the line, I don't know. I don't know how we would know or how we would find one another. I guess if there's anything that you can tell me specifically about the world that you're in now…maybe that'll help narrow things down a little. I don't know. [static] But I'm glad I finally heard you. And I hope you hear this. I hope you know that I wasn't ignoring you. I've been listening. I've been trying to listen for so long. Also you should know that I got a real crack out of you assigning colors to everybody. It sounds like you nailed them, too. I mean, Pete being money green is… [static] And I did get a good chuckle out of you picking a color that you didn't like very much for Harry. I mean, that's probably what I would have done too. But if it makes you feel any better about things, I think she liked the idea of a yellow-orange. You know, because she's a painter too she thinks about colors differently. There is no ugly color to her. It's all possibility. Anyway, Red, I hope…I hope your loneliness abates a little bit in the way that mine has. Being with Harry hasn't felt that void. Not entirely. I don't know that anything can or will unless we can find our way back, but it has helped. Being honest with her has helped. So I hope wherever you are that you're safe and that I can add more colors to your palette in the future. Whiskey out. [static]See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

Please visit breakerwhiskey.com for more information or to send a message to Whiskey's radio. Breaker Whiskey is an Atypical Artists production created by Lauren Shippen. If you'd like to support the show, please visit atypicalartists.co/support. If you'd like to send Whiskey a message, click here. ------ [TRANSCRIPT] Hello Whiskey. Ohh, that feels weird. Like… sending a message to your best friend but… also to a celebrity that has no idea you exist. I must sound a little crazy. And maybe I am. You’d probably go a little crazy down here, too. Anyway, I don’t think I’ve actually gone crazy, pretty sure I read somewhere that if you’re still able to think about whether or not you are, then you aren’t. I think therefore I am not crazy? I don’t know. I don’t think any of my transmissions are getting through, anyway. Or maybe they are and you’re just… ignoring them. That… that hurts more, I think. Knowing that someone else is out there and they don’t want to talk to you. Or maybe they’re getting trapped somewhere between here and the surface. I don’t think it’s because they sound crazy or anything – I listened back to them to be sure. That was weird, hearing my own voice. The sound was… foreign. A stranger. I know your voice better than my own, now. I could pick it out of thousands of radio signals. Couldn’t even recognize my own played back to me. But then it’s not like I’ve had much to say these past… seven years? I think it’s been seven. I stopped counting the days a while ago. Just got… depressing. All those… plain white concrete walls covered in tally marks. (Cheering) But now my walls look beautiful. I’ve been transcribing everything you’ve said – I have tapes of every broadcast, and I’ve written down every word. Pasted them up on my walls. And I haven’t used my paints in years – even… even before all of this, but… they needed a little colour. I started by making my own notes in red, and then your locations in green, for the landscape, and Birdie’s messages in blue. Like a bluebird. And all the people you talked about - Don’s rust, Richie’s yellow, Pete’s green – not like the landscape, but like… money. Like the colour that I remember money being, at least. And Harry was… well. I had decided her colour back when I thought she had hurt you – and she had, of course, but I mean… back when I thought she did it for the sake of it. So I gave her this… yellow-orange colour. And knowing what I know now, I feel… a little bad about that. I wish I’d given her a prettier one. But maybe she would like it. It’s not terrible. Sort of a… sunny orange. Like the colour that I remember the sun being, at least. Anyway, every… every rainbow needs some sun, right? And their names… they make a rainbow. (Tearing up) You brought that rainbow back into my life, Whiskey. Seven years of white walls, and now there’s colour. Seven years of silence, and you bring back sound. Seven years of isolation and desolation and hopelessness… and you bring back… me. You mentioned liking Rothko, back on… (checks) transmission 179. I mean, I’m no Rothko, obviously, but… I suppose he won’t mind if I take a little inspiration from him So Whiskey… you can call me ‘Red’. See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

Please visit breakerwhiskey.com for more information or to send a message to Whiskey's radio. Breaker Whiskey is an Atypical Artists production created by Lauren Shippen. If you'd like to support the show, please visit atypicalartists.co/support. If you'd like to send Whiskey a message, click here. ------ [TRANSCRIPT] Breaker, breaker, this is whiskey calling out to one and all. [click, static] Hi, everybody. I know it's been a minute. I’m—I'm weirdly nervous talking to you now. Now that I know that people are listening. Now that I know that people across infinite timelines are listening, it's a lot of pressure. I feel like I have a little inkling of what Jean Shepard would have felt getting on the radio every night, except I actually think I probably have more listeners than Jean, which yeah, I actually can't think about that very much or I will get even more nervous. [static] As an update because some of you have seemed curious— we’re doing good, I think. Not too much has changed since my last transmission. We're still where we were, although I think we're going to have to head down the mountain soon. The weather is changing and I don't think we want to be here when the snow comes. Well, when the snow really comes, there is already snow because we're that high up. But we can't survive a winter here, not with how thin these walls are. As for where we go next, I don't know. I know I probably won't be telling you. Not because I don't want you guys to know, but because. Well, you know, people may be listening and I don't want to invite any more trouble than I already am inclined to do, just living my life. [static] Harry and I are good for the most part. I mean, we've had a few blow up, knock down, drag out fights. Well, you know, a dozen, maybe. Nothing— nothing earth shattering, just the usual. Although now we have a a different mode of conflict resolution, by which I mean we actually make attempts at conflict resolution now and in a way that I think is very productive. Maybe not talking things out as much as we should, but I don't think either of us can complain. So. Yeah, we're. We're okay. Not much else to report. Not much has changed. Haven't heard from Birdie or from Fox since that last big transmission, but I have been hearing from a lot of you. We spend most of our days sifting through all the different messages we get. Some of them are like this, and a lot of them are Morse code, which I don't think either of us were expecting necessarily. But it's nice to have somebody else with me to translate the Morse code. One of you…one of you sent a morse code message asking if this was real. You said it was a cool project and that that threw me because does that mean that somehow you, whoever you were that send that message, you're back in the normal world and this was coming through on your normal radio and you thought, hey, maybe there's another Orson Welles joint or something of that kind. Does this sound like a story to you? Like I'm just an actor pretending to be somebody stuck somewhere. I—I’m glad that you thought it was cool. In any case, I don't know that I would categorize it that way because it's my life, but yeah. Yeah, it’s real. [static]See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

atypicalartists.co/breakerwhiskey See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

Please visit breakerwhiskey.com for more information or to send a message to Whiskey's radio. Breaker Whiskey is an Atypical Artists production created by Lauren Shippen. If you'd like to support the show, please visit patreon.com/breakerwhiskey. As a patron, you will also receive each week's episodes as one longer episode every Monday. ------ [TRANSCRIPT] [click, static] It took me the better part of a day but I think I’ve done it. I think I’ve written out your whole message. It…I honestly have no idea what it says. I was so focused on the individual letters, barely any words formed from it as I went. I…I should go get Harry. But she’s sleeping and…I think she needs the rest. After—we’re still working through things and I think—no, I know—we will be for a very long time. As we waited for your message to finish transmitting, we talked a lot. We maybe got a little…distracted from time to time, but she put it all out on the table, everything she’d been thinking and feeling that she didn’t tell me. Things she didn’t even write in her notebook. And I told her things…we aired grievances and shared the times when we thought we might get close to something, back in New York. She talked about how she felt about Pete and listened to me when I talked about him and…and she was really kind when I couldn’t parse the good from the bad, when I didn’t want to just write him off as a violent criminal. I mean, I don’t…well, there are a lot of things I need to work through and it doesn’t all have to do with Harry. Well. I could fill you in on all of it, on every detail, but…these broadcasts have been mine, separate from Harry, as much as anything in my life can be separate from Harry, and there are some things with her that are separate from the world. At least for now. I know I said I might stop transmitting now that we’re safe and I think…I think I am going to take a break. Disappear for a little while like you’re so fond of doing. I’m—well, I think I’m happy and I’m not totally sure what to do with that feeling. Especially since it’s laced with…well, Junior is still out there, we’re still trapped here and even though I know what it’s like to kiss her, to— I don’t think I’ve forgiven Harry yet, not fully. She knows that, she…she’s understanding of it. Genuinely. But that doesn’t mean I don’t want to try to get there. Especially since I know I haven’t been the paragon of healthy communication and perfect relationship behavior so there are things that I need to…that I need her forgiveness on and, well, I think she wants to try to get there too. All that said—well, I don’t know what I’m going to find in your message and I hope it’s not goodbye forever, but maybe this is a goodbye for now. I want only good things for you Birdie. I hope you get a little peace of mind. A little closure. I’m discovering eve the tiniest glimpse of it really does wonders. Okay. Here we go. “Dear Whiskey, I am sorry that we couldn’t meet. You find yourself in a watch tower of my own creation. I wasn’t positive it would still be functioning in this timeline—you never do know when an earthquake or a storm is going to cause something to come toppling down—but I’m relieved to find that it is. I do wish I could have been there myself, but we can only enter timelines through great pains and effort and I have already interfered far more than we are meant to. Though I suppose my hand was forced when I ceased to be the only one communicating with you. The person you know as Fox is, as you guessed, a purist. They want all people in all places to be instead in one place, following one path. They do not believe that anyone should be free to make their own choices and live with the consequences. They would prefer to guide your hand into another choice you cannot take back, all in service of what they deem to be correct. They know what they are; they even told you directly. Though they are not the figment of an author’s imagination, they are as close to Eternity as one can get. Though in this case, they are not the norm, but a rebel. And I cannot claim there is nothing to re—rebel against. It is not a perfect system. It is hard, to watch people suffer in the worlds of their own creation, with no obvious recourse. Sometimes these timelines correct themselves, merging with each other or disappearing entirely. But even we, the keepers and observers of these strands, cannot fully comprehend the intricacies of why certain shifts are created. As you know, you are not the first person for whom I have tried to bring comfort in a lonely universe. Not all alternate worlds are as empty as yours, but some are even emptier. And yours, was of course, becoming more empty all the time, though that may not be a bad thing for every person involved. Fox told you you’re too late because the timeline has shifted once again. I’ll explain that in a moment but first I need to talk about the shift that preceded it, that caused an angry man to seek vengeance. A few months ago, Fred Billing

Please visit breakerwhiskey.com for more information or to send a message to Whiskey's radio. Breaker Whiskey is an Atypical Artists production created by Lauren Shippen. If you'd like to support the show, please visit patreon.com/breakerwhiskey. As a patron, you will also receive each week's episodes as one longer episode every Monday. ------ [TRANSCRIPT] [click, static] Well. We, uh, made up. I— [click, static] It’s not fixed, it’s not like everything is suddenly—there’s still a lot we need to… (clears throat) She—she came looking for me. I wasn’t even done transmitting and she well, it was a long conversation and I’m not sure how much I—But I think I can probably give you the highlights. She said she wouldn’t give up. That I could keep moving in whatever direction I want to and she would be right behind me. That she’d stay there until I wanted her next to me. That she— She told me that she wouldn’t ever stop loving me even if I decided I couldn’t forgive her. That she’d love me even if I chose to love someone else. That she wanted to watch me keep loving the world, in the hopes that it would help me love her again. (a small laugh) And that she wants me to shout at her whenever it seems like she’s forgetting that, whenever she starts to hold me too tightly. She wanted to start over. That’s the only thing she asked of me. That we could start fresh, get to know each other again, leave everything behind and try to…try to make something new, even if it’s just a friendship. Even if we’re still strangers two years from now. I told her no. I can’t start over. I won’t. I can’t forget what she’s told me, I can’t box away every contradictory feeling I’ve had for her. And I don’t know where that leaves us but I—in that moment, after hearing the last secret she had from me, that she loves me—I just decided, to hell with it, if this is—if she’s going to spent the next…who the hell knows how long, trying to get my forgiveness, my trust again, then I’m going into that with all the information I can and I—I kissed her. I didn’t…I didn’t expect anything from it. I just kissed her the once, not a prelude to anything, simple and earnest, but I just had to know. I’ve spent too much time, too many years, not knowing. And maybe it was unfair of me, to ask that of her without being able to promise the exact nature of the feelings behind it but she, uh, she didn’t seem to mind. She didn’t stop at kissing me once. And the moment she put her arms around me…(laughs) I had no hope. Passion is an emotion that can come from so many origin points and I don’t know if it was love or anger or some combination of what she brings out in me but…well, it turns out just shutting up and working out our issues in different ways is…not a bad idea. [a door opens behind Whiskey] So that’s where we—that’s where we are. (smiling) Um, and— [footsteps approaching] Well, I’m still not letting her broadcast on my frequencies, but she’s— (off mic) Yes, I have been talking about you and you know that— (on mic) Like I said, things aren’t fixed, but it’s—it feels like moving forward for the first time in a long time and— (distracted) And, um, well she’s been…it’s like a floodgate has opened and—(off mic, laughing) Harry, get off— [click, static] (breathless) Sorry, uh…maybe I should keep doing these by myself seeing as someone can’t keep their hands— [click, static] Jesus, sorry—I got on here for a reason, you know. Because, well, I finally got my wish. My other wish. Our date this morning. I don’t even know what to do with the length of this message. I can’t tell where it ends and begins but I’m going to—I’m going to try. I said I’d sit in front of the radio for hours and copy out morse code and I’m sticking to that promise. It really is nice having so many radios. I’m recording and it seems like it’s going to keep going for a little while so— (off mic, exasperated) Harry— [click, static] Yeah, okay, I’m gonna go— Signing off. [click, static]See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

Please visit breakerwhiskey.com for more information or to send a message to Whiskey's radio. Breaker Whiskey is an Atypical Artists production created by Lauren Shippen. If you'd like to support the show, please visit patreon.com/breakerwhiskey. As a patron, you will also receive each week's episodes as one longer episode every Monday. ------ [TRANSCRIPT] [click, static] I could really use your dits and dashes right now, Birdie. I could really use anyone to talk to. Harry and I—well, all that growth and warming up and being more vulnerable…I guess I was lulled into a false sense of calm, because things finally…I didn’t think we had more to say to each other, but I guess we did. It was you…it was you saying “our date”. Can you believe that? All of this time, everything that’s happened, and it was a little jealousy over a person I question is real half the time that finally tipped Harry over. And, you know, I’d been suspecting that she was jealous of you but…Jesus. When I told her about your message, I guess—well, I was happy! I am happy, I’m looking forward to hearing what you have to say. But she—she read something into it because she asked me if I’m in love with you. Which is just… Don’t take this the wrong way, Birdie, but that’s absurd to me. I’m grateful for you—more than I think I can ever fully express—and I hope that I’ve brought…well, something to what sounds like your fairly complicated existence, but I don’t know you. Not really. I know that you’re caring, and regretful, and scared—I know enough to consider you a friend and to want to really get to know you and cement that friendship. But I don’t know you like I… I don’t know all the different kinds of laughs you have—the one when you’re being polite, when you think someone is being stupid, when you actually find something hilarious but don’t want to admit it, when you’re embarrassed or flattered, and the one that’s just genuine joy. I don’t know if you have any scars or birthmarks or that you broke your arm falling off a bike when you were eleven and haven’t ever really ridden a bike since. I don’t know the names of your parents or if you have siblings, or what you would spend your perfect day doing. And it’s not just…the minutiae, it’s…I wouldn’t recognize you in a crowd. I can listen to any song and not have it remind me of you. I can wake up and not have you be the first thing on my mind. I didn’t—I didn’t say all that, but I told Harry she was crazy, which, well, was the wrong thing to say because she…she blew up at me. She said that she’s felt this before, that she knows what it’s like to be on the outside when I’m on the inside with someone. That that’s what it’s always like with— I know—I know that you can’t ever really know what someone is experiencing. How a person sees the same events that you’re both going through. But I’d—I’d really had no idea that Harry felt so left out all the time. That my friendship with the guys put her on the outs. That the easy way I had of being with everyone we ever met—with Sissy and K and Francis and Sylvie—how the way that I liked everyone and everyone liked me felt like she was always standing in front of a locked door. And that I was doing that now, that Birdie is my person and that Harry just gets the scraps of both. I…well, it put some things into context I guess. She’s selfish, possessive, resentful of the fact that she had to share me with all of New York and now she has to share me with the world. She hates the fact that I spent all that time not talking to her and then started telling every inner thought and private secret to anyone who could listen. She’s jealous of you and she’s jealous of my radio. And I’m not—that’s not me calling her selfish or possessive or any of that. That’s how she put it. Her exact words. And what does she want me to do with that? I—I didn’t say anything. I just walked away and came back up here. After all, it’s her turn to be the one left holding the emotional bag. I know she’s listening right now. I know she’s gone down to the little visitor center and turned on her radio because I know she knows that the first thing I’d do is get on here and talk to you. Talk to the void. Except it was never the void, was it? All this time, I left to find people, to hope I’d have someone else to talk to, and I was just talking right to Harry all the while. And that’s the real truth of it. So I might as well talk straight to her right now. Sometimes I was so happy that we were the only two people in the entire universe. And then you told me what you did and I found myself wishing that I’d drive out into the world and find it full of people and then come back home to tell you and you…wouldn’t be there anymore. And I’d realize that it had all been some weird illusion, or dream, or nervous breakdown and that the whole time I’d been holed up with you, the world kept turning and it was you that wasn’t there. That you were somewhere else entirely, somewhere I’d never be able to reach. Somew

Please visit breakerwhiskey.com for more information or to send a message to Whiskey's radio. Breaker Whiskey is an Atypical Artists production created by Lauren Shippen. If you'd like to support the show, please visit patreon.com/breakerwhiskey. As a patron, you will also receive each week's episodes as one longer episode every Monday. ------ [TRANSCRIPT] [click, static] This place is…extraordinary. I woke up with the sunrise this morning and it was breathtaking. It’s so…quiet. I mean, it’s not actually that quiet, the sounds of the wind and the creaking trees and whatever wildlife is out here—oh, and I found the rifle, which I guess is good in case any of that wildlife deciding to come to our door but they’d have to get up the stairs first. I guess this means I am teaching Harry how to shoot after all. Maybe I’ll finally learn to hunt. But—those sounds aside, the natural sounds, it’s peaceful. Being in cities now is eerie—they’re quiet but it isn’t right. This place was so untouched by people to begin with that it feels right. It gives me the same feeling I got in Wyoming all those months ago. Except, this time, I’m not trying to forget about Harry, because I very much can’t forget about her. Last night—well, it doesn’t matter that it’s July, the nights still get fucking freezing this high up. But, as you know, there’s a cast iron stove in the watchtower, and there’s still a whole pile of wood underneath the stairs, so we had that going all night. And I guess we both were still too cold because somehow, in the course of the night, we both ended up with our blankets and pillows in front of the stove. Between the fire and the shared warmth, I slept…well, I slept really well for the first time in a long time. It’s not that I’ve never woken up next to her before. When we were first on the run, we couldn’t afford to be out of each other’s sight for too long. But this was—this was different. It's the first time there’s been nothing between us—no secrets, no lies, no games. Harry has been different these last few weeks and it’s like I was getting so used to being around her again, and all the mixed up feelings that that brought up, that I didn’t even notice until now. But the way she did eventually go along with what I wanted to do, the way that she admitted that coming here was a good idea… She isn’t just surrendering, telling me what I want to hear. I know what that’s like, I’ve lived with that version of Harry for months. After she told me the truth, she tried to…change. Become some version of herself that she thought I could forgive, being easy and agreeable and giving me space and consideration and I fucking hated it. That’s not what she’s doing now. She’s just…thawing. She’s letting herself be vulnerable. She’s letting herself be wrong. I’m starting to feel like maybe she doesn’t just want my forgiveness to make her life easier, but because she is genuinely remorseful about everything. Maybe in the end that distinction doesn’t mean anything, but it matters to me. And it matters—it matters that she was trying to protect me in her own roundabout way even if I wish she’d just come to me when she found out about Pete— (sigh) My head is so loud. If we’re really safe from prying eyes here…I might stop transmitting for a while after our date on Thursday. I’m…I’m tired. Waking up so peaceful and safe and warm this morning…it all hit me, this huge wave of exhaustion. I’m so tired of being angry. I’m tired of being scared. And I think taking some time after we talk to—to put down everything I’ve been carrying around…it might be a good idea. I’m—I’m excited to see what you have to say. You said “message will repeat” so I assume we’re not going to be playing our yes and no game. It better be a long message, Birdie. I think…I think I understand why you chose that name. There’s a bird-feeder on the railing and even though there’s no seed in it, I’ve still seen the most beautiful array of birds. I’ve been sitting here all morning, waiting for Harry to return from her supply run, and just watching them. And wondering if you built the feeder yourself, so that you could have some company. Is this what you did? You sat in this watchtower, with enough radio equipment to speak to the world, and you listened and looked out on the sunrise and the birds and felt like you were in the one good and beautiful place in the entire universe, across all timelines? Or did you feel trapped? Consigned to your tower like some kind of fairytale princess? Did you look at the birds and wish you could be free too? [click, static]See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

Please visit breakerwhiskey.com for more information or to send a message to Whiskey's radio. Breaker Whiskey is an Atypical Artists production created by Lauren Shippen. If you'd like to support the show, please visit patreon.com/breakerwhiskey. As a patron, you will also receive each week's episodes as one longer episode every Monday. ------ [TRANSCRIPT] [click, static] Okay, we…we found it. We actually found it. How does this…how does this work? I mean, it sure seems like you were here, once, given the sheer volume of radios and…other equipment that I haven’t even begun to figure out yet. I think there’s some recording stuff, which is helpful—I wonder if I can figure out a way to rig it so that it can listen to every frequency and record whenever it detects a message. That sounds way beyond my capabilities and maybe impossible. But at the very least, I am going to spend some time testing everything out. And overall, it seems like a pretty good hideout—it’s a lot more spacious than it looks from the ground, and I bet the signal and transmission reach is amazing. There’s nothing in the way of supplies, really, but we passed a town a while back and there’s a visitor’s center a little further down the mountain from here, so I think we’ll be set for a while as long as I keep the car in good working order. There are two beds here—did you have a friend with you once? Was it Fox? Or did you somehow supply this place for us. It’s…well, it’s covered in dust. But everything in this world is covered in dust. But you’re…you’re not here. I’m not sure I really expected you to be, or at least, I tried not to, but I’m still disappointed. I still hoped… You were here once though, weren’t you? This is where you…where you listened to all the other timelines? Where you communicated with whoever it is you communicate with? Where are you now? Another timeline? The right one? Or somewhere else entirely, somewhere in between? I assume…I mean, there is a visitor’s center. I assume that this was an active fire watch tower before. I’ve taken a few photos and everything looks pretty much the same in them, and there doesn’t seem to be anyone there but…I don’t know. Shockingly, Harry was pretty gracious about the fact that she’s been proven wrong—that you seemed to have led us to a good place, a useful place. She admitted she was wrong, something that is still all too rare. And she told me—she said she still doesn’t trust you, but she trusts me, and that’s enough. Is that trust enough for me? Is that trust worth anything? What else is she going to do but trust me? What else could I do but trust you? Is trust less valuable when it’s forced by circumstance? Or does that just make it more honest? Now that we’re here…what do we do? I’m glad to be safe, to be out of Fox’s view, but you promised me answers. [click, static] [beeps] --- ..- .-. / -.. .- - . .-.-.- / -- . ... ... .- --. . / .-- .. .-.. .-.. / .-. . .--. . .- - .-.-.- Our date. Message will repeat.See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

Please visit breakerwhiskey.com for more information or to send a message to Whiskey's radio. Breaker Whiskey is an Atypical Artists production created by Lauren Shippen. If you'd like to support the show, please visit patreon.com/breakerwhiskey. As a patron, you will also receive each week's episodes as one longer episode every Monday. ------ [TRANSCRIPT] [click, static] Alright, we’re…we’re not there yet, not exactly, but we’re close. Except…Birdie, are you leading us up a mountain? Is this…safe? What exactly are we looking for? I don’t know what we’re going to find the further we go up, but I have a feeling we’re not going to trip over a bustling town. You said no one could see us. I definitely get that from a, you know, other human beings who may or may not be alive in this country at the moment standpoint, but I don’t see how being on a mountain hides us from Fox or any of your other insane coworkers. And I’m still not sure why I want trust you when you say this is the right thing to do. But the promise of answers…of maybe even meeting you… Well. Harry is much more skeptical, you’ll not be surprised to learn. It’s…it’s been interesting reading her notebook. I haven’t had an over abundance of time, what with being the morse translator and the driver—it’s not that Harry can’t drive, but I’d much rather be at the wheel while she tries to keep me entertained with lectures on various topics or anecdotes about ridiculous people she knew in the art world. But what I have read so far…Harry really does not like you, Birdie. Which I knew but…yeesh. Any time you sent a message, she would write these little notes about what kind of sinister second meaning could be behind your words. It was the same thing with Fox, and I guess she was right on that score, but despite my maybe foolish faith that you really do have the best intentions at heart, you and Fox are no different in her mind. We…we got into kind of an argument about it. I think being in such close quarters after so long—sure, we shared a house for six years, but that’s very different from being trapped in a car together day in and day out. I think—I think both of our patience is wearing thin. Harry wanted to get more information—wanted to be sure we could trust you before we went anywhere you led us. But how exactly would she go about getting that information? It’s not like we can look you up in the book. I told her I was done waiting. That the worst that could happen has already happened and I was going whether she wanted to come or not. She didn’t take that particularly well. And, of course, it’s not entirely true. Terrible things have happened, but we’re still alive. I guess there are worse things that could happen. But we’re…we’re alive in other places too, aren’t we? We’re dead in other places, I would think. Infinite iterations of us…we wouldn’t have made it past thirty in one of those timelines. I’ve had a hard time falling asleep lately, because I just keep thinking about those other versions. I can’t stop wondering if Abi is happy somewhere else, if there’s any point to this version of me staying alive when I could be doing so much better elsewhere? But then again…this is all I know. I’m assuming if I die, I don’t just wake up in another timeline, living another Abi’s life. If that were the case, we’d all be constantly besieged by other versions of us slamming into our consciousnesses. I exist as I am now and I can’t exist in any other way. I can’t go back, I can’t go sideways into another place, I can only move forward. That’s what I was trying to explain to Harry. That’s what I’ve been trying to explain to her for seven goddamn years. And she…she’s going along now, finally. When I threatened to go without her, she didn’t even let me finish the sentence before she told me that wasn’t happening. She said—she said even if I did sneak off in the dead of night and try to find you on my own, that she’d chase me across the whole country if she had to. That she’s thought about chasing me every single day since I left and now that she has me in her sights, she’s not going to stop. I—(a small laugh) I would’ve given anything to hear her say something like that a year ago. Six months ago, two months ago. And having her say it now, it just put into perfect clear focus how much…how much anger I still hold. How much resentment. How much compounding confusion around her, especially since she told me about Pete and… And it’s…it’s not enough. It’s not enough for her to tell me she wants me and then in the next breath tell me she betrayed me. It’s not enough for her to say she would chase me to the edge of the earth when it comes after trying to convince me not to do something I know I want to do. Anyway, I think I’m done chasing you, right Birdie? I’m here. And I’ll climb to the top of this mountain if I have to. [click, static] [beeps] ..-. .. .-. . .-- .- - -.-. .... .-.-.- Firewatch.See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice

Please visit breakerwhiskey.com for more information or to send a message to Whiskey's radio. Breaker Whiskey is an Atypical Artists production created by Lauren Shippen. If you'd like to support the show, please visit patreon.com/breakerwhiskey. As a patron, you will also receive each week's episodes as one longer episode every Monday. ------ [TRANSCRIPT] [click, static] I’ll be honest, Birdie, for a second I thought you’d lost it. Who am I talking to in my dreams? I’ll give you three guesses. It was Harry, of course, who reminded me that I said something just like this once last year. It’s…eerie, the way that she instantly knew what you were talking about when I finished translating your code. It’s like having her read my mind and find thoughts that I didn’t even know were there. You said this was the final one, so I guess we’ve got all the numbers but….they don’t really make sense. We’re pretty sure we’ve got the latitude right, but the longitude isn’t…the grouping of month and day would mean that the longitude is halfway around the world and then the date that you gave for the seconds is over sixty, which doesn’t make any sense either. (a beat) (gasps) A zero! It’s missing a zero, you changed up the date format for the last one—it’s not 12/13, it’s 121, 39—okay, I think I get it now! Holy shit. I—we’re not even that far from this. We can be there…tomorrow. Holy shit. And it’s…safe? This place you’re sending us to? You’re sure it’s safe. Because even if Fox or Junior can’t work out the code, it seems like Fox can still just…figure out where people are, which doesn’t bring me a lot of comfort. But…we’ve gone too far to go back now. [click, static] [beeps] -. --- / --- -. . / -.-. .- -. / ... . . / -.-- --- ..- No one can see youSee Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

Please visit breakerwhiskey.com for more information or to send a message to Whiskey's radio. Breaker Whiskey is an Atypical Artists production created by Lauren Shippen. If you'd like to support the show, please visit patreon.com/breakerwhiskey. As a patron, you will also receive each week's episodes as one longer episode every Monday. ------ [TRANSCRIPT] [click, static] Okay, Utah postcard. I wish I still had it, so I could be certain, because I did date all of them, but I just have to hope that Harry’s notes are accurate. She wishes I still had it too. She said she really hoped that she’d get to read all the postcards someday and…well, maybe she still can. Maybe someday we will go back to the house and gather them up, along with all her art and the painting I got for her in Santa Fe. If you’d told me six months ago that I’d happily hand over each and every one of those postcards to her, I’m not sure I’d believe you. But what else could she possibly learn about me, what could I possibly say to her that would be more vulnerable than everything that’s already happened. She’s cracked open my rib cage and looked inside and somehow I’m still standing, so… She’s started to let me read her notebook. She says it’s only fair. That she has this enormous advantage having listened to me talk to the air all this time. That she always had the advantage, knowing the score when I didn’t. I thought it would be helpful to hear that. To hear her admit that she’s always had the power out of the two of us. That letting her guilt and secrecy dictate our lives meant that she was always the one who had her finger on the button of our potential happiness. But it didn’t. Knowing that she thinks of herself as a coward, that she regrets what she put me through, it doesn’t actually change the fact that she put me through it. It just…makes me sad. For me, for her, for us. But I do—I do appreciate the gesture of giving me her notebook. I never would’ve expected that from her. Fox said…they said it was too late. I don’t know what that means. I don’t know if it’s too late for us to disappear, too late for us to come and meet you, too late for us to fix anything but… I’m choosing to ignore it for now. As long as you’re still sending us codes, I don’t need to listen to Fox. That’s a problem for future Whiskey. And you said—you also said “keep you safe”. That’s what you’re trying to accomplish here? Keeping us safe? From Fox? From Junior? If that’s the case, I guess I should say thank you. Though don’t hold it against me if I wait to see where this all leads before I give my full gratitude. [click, static] [beeps] ..-. .. -. .- .-.. .-.-.- / .-- .... --- / .- .-. . / -.-- --- ..- / - .- .-.. -.- .. -. --. / - --- / .. -. / -.-- --- ..- .-. / -.. .-. . .- -- ... ..--.. Final. Who are you talking to in your dreams?See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

Please visit breakerwhiskey.com for more information or to send a message to Whiskey's radio. Breaker Whiskey is an Atypical Artists production created by Lauren Shippen. If you'd like to support the show, please visit patreon.com/breakerwhiskey. As a patron, you will also receive each week's episodes as one longer episode every Monday. ------ [TRANSCRIPT] [click, static] “Picked citrus fruit”. That’s the next date. And my god, it feels like that was a million years ago, a different lifetime. Oh damn, I just realized…when I ditched the old car, I left Dean Martin’s suit in there. I’d also picked up a dress for Harry that I thought she’d look amazing—that I thought she’d like, um, not that I’m going to tell her that. But I am bummed about Dean’s suit. I liked that suit. Anyway, even though I remember the weeks I was in LA, I definitely didn’t remember the exact date I went around snatching everyone’s lemons and oranges. I was starting to worry that I wouldn’t be able to figure out what the next set of numbers are but then…well, I don’t know if you somehow knew this or you were just counting on me being a better diary-keeper than I am, but Harry’s attention to detail has saved the day. She’s…well, she’s kept a notebook of every single transmission I ever made. Or, at least, every transmission that she heard. It’s not like she transcribed everything I said, but she…she wrote the date, and where she thinks I was and little bits of what I talked about. If I mentioned her. She wouldn’t let me see the whole notebook, but I saw enough to know that. It’s…well, I’m grateful, I guess, that she did that, because it’s helping us now, but it’s galling to have your innermost thoughts laid out and catalogued in that way. And I know, I know, they weren’t my innermost thoughts, not when I was getting on here and talking about them to anyone who would listen. But I said…a lot over this past year. And I don’t know if Harry wrote down any of what she thought and felt about what I had to say but… It’s useful, that’s the point. It’s good she did it, because I sure as hell don’t remember when I said or did most things, but also the fact that she did it at all is messing with my head a little bit. All those years of living together and feeling like she wasn’t really listening half the time and now this. I have to wonder if Fox has done the same thing. Written down every transmission I made and what I said. You must have, in order to give me a code in this way. Harry’s started to get worried that you’re leading us to Junior. That we are going to have to kill him. I told her there’d be no point to sending us on this weird memory lane wild goose chase if it was just going to end in the same confrontation but… I think there’s still a part of her that’s hoping we’ll encounter him, honestly. I think she’s willing to do what I’m not. Well, I think she’s willing in theory. I think, if it came down to it, she wouldn’t be able to. It’s not…it’s not as easy as I think she thinks it is. Even as a matter of survival. Even if you know that person is fated to die. Because that’s the thing…he’s not fated to die. Not here. And I don’t know what kind of life he could have, but he does have a life here. And he should get to live it if he wants to, regardless of what happens to him in any other timeline, or whatever is ordained from on high. If you are leading us to Junior, I can’t imagine what your goal would be. You said interfering in the past had destroyed things so what are you hoping to accomplish now? [click, static] [contrasting beeps of different pitches] ..- - .- .... / .--. --- ... - -.-. .- .-. -.. .-.-.- / -.- . . .--. / -.-- --- ..- / ... .- ..-. . Utah postcard. Keep you safe -.-- --- ..- .-..-. .-. . / - --- --- / .-.. .- - . You’re too lateSee Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

Please visit breakerwhiskey.com for more information or to send a message to Whiskey's radio. Breaker Whiskey is an Atypical Artists production created by Lauren Shippen. If you'd like to support the show, please visit patreon.com/breakerwhiskey. As a patron, you will also receive each week's episodes as one longer episode every Monday. ------ [TRANSCRIPT] [click, static] Sorry it’s been a few days, Birdie—we spent a little time sightseeing. Now that Harry is out and about, she seems very keen on seeing whatever she can. I won’t tell you exactly what we saw, but it was a national park and it was breathtaking. Speaking of not saying things…you told me not to say things aloud—I’m assuming things in response to your messages—and then you said, very worryingly “You have gun too. Received.” I’d been hoping that was some kind of error on your part, but even as an error it doesn’t make any sense. I received that message from Fox, but just like I told Fox, I don’t have a gun anymore, considering I had to abandon my car and everything in it. And, for what it’s worth, I haven’t picked another one up. Harry wants us too—lord knows we’ve passed enough places that stock them—but I don’t see the point, not when I’m still no good at hunting. I definitely don’t have any plans to use it on anything but a wild animal. And I’m sure as shit not teaching Harry how to shoot and if there’s one thing stupider than having a gun in the first place, it’s having a gun around someone who doesn’t know how to use one. So what exactly are you trying to tell me? You gave me numbers, numbers that I’m fairly certain are the first part of coordinates, but I’m going to need a lot more than that. I— [a knock on the door] Hold on, I think that’s Harry. [click, static for a while] [click] Alright, sorry about that but, uh, well, I think we’ve figured it out? Or Harry figured it out. You were trying to tell me the date that that message was received. Same thing as with the letter date. You’re giving me more numbers. Is that…is that right? If this is all going to be dates, than I’m going to assume the year isn’t part of it. It’d be strange to have one-nine-seven-five or seven-four in multiple different places in coordinates. When I do have all the numbers, I guess I’ll figure out the hours, minutes, and seconds. I’m at least assuming you’re giving it to me in order, and I think it’s safe to say that we’re looking at the general northwest quadrant of the country. But correct me on any of that if I’m wrong. Thankfully, I know the date for this one too, given I write down every morse code message I get. And don’t worry, I won’t say it on here, but I I’m fairly certain I’m right. I guess you’ll just have to trust me. [click, static] [beeps] .--. .. -.-. -.- . -.. / -.-. .. - .-. ..- ... / ..-. .-. ..- .. - Picked citrus fruitSee Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

Please visit breakerwhiskey.com for more information or to send a message to Whiskey's radio. Breaker Whiskey is an Atypical Artists production created by Lauren Shippen. If you'd like to support the show, please visit patreon.com/breakerwhiskey. As a patron, you will also receive each week's episodes as one longer episode every Monday. ------ [TRANSCRIPT] [click, static] Can you hear that Birdie? [the distant sound of fireworks] Fireworks. They started about ten minutes ago and we’ve—well, we’ve even been able to see a few, just the ghost of them really. We couldn’t figure out why the hell fireworks of all things would be bleeding through and then we realized that it’s the fourth of July. Not only that but, as Harry pointed out, the bicentennial is next year. She figures people are probably kicking off a whole year of celebration today. One hundred and ninety nine years. That’s how long America has been a country. I can’t tell if that’s a long time or a short time. Two hundred doesn’t sound very long as the lifespan of a nation, but then when you think about everything America has done in that time…both the good and the bad… I mean, it’s mostly bad, isn’t it? I’m certainly not a poster child for the establishment, but I think we can all agree that America really made quite the impression in the last two centuries, including killing a lot of people. Which…I guess that’s another case of throwing stones from a glass house. But also…my grandparents came here from Scotland, Harry’s came from Poland—everyone we know came from somewhere else. Living in New York was the best of this—all the different people you could meet, the different food you could eat, the languages you’d hear on the subway. The last time I saw fourth of July fireworks with Harry was…sixty five or six, I think. The whole crew went out to Jones Beach with a case of beer and peanut butter and jelly sandwiches that Pete had thrown together for us. We’d just finished fencing the last item from a job a few months earlier and I think we were all feeling that sense of camaraderie particularly strongly. And I remember Pete saying “what a country we live in. A true haven for the crooked and criminal” and we all toasted to that. He was right. From the…Boston Tea Party to the wild west to us, what is America’s legacy but one of outlawry? Including fireworks! Maybe not in every state, but there’s something fitting about celebrating the country’s birthday by enjoying an illegal activity. All those memories now…thinking about Pete hadn’t really hurt like this even after Harry first told me but knowing the details now, being unable to create a more forgiving narrative in my head… It just hurts to think about, that’s all. I—I loved him, in my own way and I thought he—and I like to think that Harry was paranoid, that there’s something about his old partner that we don’t know that made Pete do what he did and that he’d never have hurt me but he— I think it’s just the realization that I didn’t really know him at all. And I knew that—I knew that he was a mystery to me, to everyone, but I thought I knew the way I didn’t know him, if that makes sense. I thought I knew the important things. I— [click, static] Harry’s calling me over—apparently she found a new part of the sky that’s got some visible fireworks. I hope you’re seeing the sky light up wherever you are, Birdie. [click, static] [beeps] -.-- --- ..- / .... .- ...- . / --. ..- -. / - --- --- .-.-.- / .-. . -.-. . .. ...- . -.. .-.-.- You have gun too. Received.See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.