Beautiful Stories From Anonymous People

Chris speaks with a young woman about her psychic abilities, putting them to the test in front of the live audience. She explains her fascination with astrology TikTok and analyzes Geth's birth chart despite his skepticism. He presents some thought provoking questions about raccoons, favorite berries, and the existence of ghosts. Later on, she opens up about doing EMDR therapy and how it's benefitted her.

Chris speaks with a young woman who purposefully set herself up for a year of failure to develop a thicker skin. She shares her experiences trying stand-up comedy, MCing a parade, and getting rejected by a dating show. She also wrote a letter to Jason Sudeikis asking if he'd go bowling with her. Did he ever receive her request? Geth texts Jason to find out. She also opens up about getting divorced and how a year of rejection helped her deal with anxiety and depression.

Elephants are overrated. At least that's what this former zookeeper thinks. A park interpreter opens up to Geth about her experience working at the zoo including the struggle to earn a decent wage. She describes her love of working with hippos and the dangers of "scary smart monkeys." She discusses her frustration with people in her state being allowed to own exotic animals and her issues with "Tiger King." She also shares her thoughts about keeping animals in captivity and details about her current position helping people connect to nature.

Chris GethardA hairstylist from Canada explains how she went from powerlifting to pole dancing recreationally. She introduces the live audience in Portland to one of her three birds. Will he squawk his signature line, "did you poopie?" You'll have to wait and see! She also shares with Geth the story of being proposed to by her high school sweetheart in a hotel bathroom. Later on, they debate if she has a Canadian accent and discuss their scariest bird moments.

Getting arrested on New Year's Eve was a blessing in disguise. A woman describes how working as a pharmacy tech led to pill addiction. She opens up to Geth about starting detox in prison and healing her relationship with her son. She also shares what it's like welding "space crap" with lasers and what she's learned in recovery about empathy.

Everyone lied to her about what it's like to plan a wedding. A bride-to-be opens up about stress, making tough decisions, and wedding crashers leading up to the big day. She and Geth bond over how great it feels not to invite someone you don't actually like. Later on, Chris and the audience help write her vows and pick out a wedding song.

He didn't become the person he wanted, so he took it out on her. A young woman speaks with Geth about her abusive ex and the red flags she realized in retrospect. She opens up about how he used pity as a manipulation tactic, threatened "social blackmail," controlled how she dressed, and ended the relationship while they were tripping on acid. She also describes the eventual fallout between their mutual friends and how much better her life is now.

A gum covered dog, a bomb threatened hospital, and a tornado warning. A woman describes the cartoonish obstacles she had to overcome to visit her ailing father. She opens up to Geth about navigating family drama and the weirdness of getting emails about Father's Day. Later on, the audience welcomes her to the "dead dad club" with no shortage of dark jokes.

The nature is good, but the isolation and no pizza delivery? Not so great. A lawyer speaks with Geth about transitioning from big city living to farm life. She opens up about her discomfort "presenting as wealthy," growing up working class, and raising her kids not to be spoiled. Later on, she shares what happened when her baby needed brain surgery and her deep appreciation for Canada's healthcare system.

She got ghosted by a guy with a pet rabbit named Bun Bun, but not before he gave her covid. A painter explains to Geth why she moved into an RV with a crystal-selling-hippie and how she confronted him at his mom's house. She also discusses the time her dad talked her down during an acid trip, why she quit drugs during the pandemic, and how different her life is now.

Wrist surgery turned into something more serious and his dog lost a leg to cancer, but that won't keep this caller down. Geth speaks with a 25-year-old about how growing up without a ton of money and selling homemade yarn balls to pay for summer camp shaped his positive outlook on life. He shares stories about delivering Peloton bikes to billionaires, working in real estate, and growing up in a religious household. He also opens up about getting married young and proudly describes his wife as "badass" for becoming a commercial pilot.

A 24-year-old woman keeps getting hit on by couples, but she's never had a threesome. Geth and a live audience help her decide if she should go on a throuple date for the free food. She also opens up about moving from a small island to NYC to escape the fighting between her mom and grandma. She wonders if her dysfunctional family is the reason she attracts engaged women, married men who claim to be in the secret service, and other "crazy people."

A queer journalist opens up to Geth about the pressure to be active on social media and feeling traumatized covering the news. They discuss the complicated relationship between comedy and journalism and what happened when he got called out in someone's special. He also talks through his frustrations with clickbait headlines and famous comedians making jokes about trans people.

Live from Sirius XM studios in New York, it's Beautiful/Anonymous!A 31-year-old single Californian shares the pros and cons of traveling around Europe alone. She speaks with Geth about how she kept the trip a secret from her job and the perks of crying with a mask on at Euro Disney. She also discusses feeling guilty as the daughter of Indian immigrants for wanting to renounce her U.S. Citizenship after the overturning of Roe v. Wade.

A woman describes the surprising events that led to her heart attack. She opens up to Geth about the fact that her brother died last year of a heart attack at 42 under completely different circumstances. She also shares the letter she wrote to her husband detailing her final wishes, including that he not sprinkle her ashes on their garden and grow "death tomatoes." Later on, she discusses planning a booze cruise funeral, the pros of not having kids, and feeling at peace with her life.

A married couple who recently became foster parents talk about what motivated them to foster and how it's dramatically changed their lives. They open up about how everyday is "emotional limbo" because they don't know if the kids will return to their birth parents. They also share their love of D&D, revealing character names such as Trina Tinkleberry the gnome.

Chris speaks with a man about having an affair with a married woman he met at work and the aftermath of his decision. He opens up about getting divorced and losing friends. He also shares how his bipolar disorder affected the marriage and the importance of focusing on his mental health now.

A self described "big time goof" with a laugh you won't forget opens up to Geth about his dreams of becoming a traveling musician. The former children's librarian discusses his favorite children's book "Everybody Poops" and explains why he calls himself "the king of cats." He also plays a song inspired by his life loosely titled "Narrow Urethra." You can guess what that's about.

In order to keep her faith, she had to accept who she really was. A woman speaks with Geth about going through a breakup and bringing her queerness and spirituality into alliance. She opens up about being part of a church that did more harm to her than good and finding a higher purpose. She also discusses moving back in with her parents post breakup and a potential autism diagnosis.

A law student shares how he ended up paying for school selling weed on the dark web. He explains why he thinks college is a scam and how dealing drugs is a study in human behavior. He also confirms Geth's suspicions that law students like to party with a story about a mimosa brunch gone awry.

A piano playing jazz musician improvises songs with Chris about his son's tummy troubles, art, and life. She also opens up about doing a stand-up set for her musical hero and experiencing harassment as a woman in the jazz world.

A father in Portugal opens up to Geth about fatherhood and raising a child with Autism. He explains how his son's diagnosis made him start to question if he too might be on the Autism spectrum. He also discusses where to vacation in his home country and some things you might not know about Portugal.

After 20 years together, her husband told her that he was attracted to men. Now they're in an open marriage and still best friends. A woman opens up to Geth about being honest with their kids, sex after menopause, and her husband's Parkinson's diagnosis.

A native Texan opens up to Geth about leaving everything behind after her mom's death and moving to Thailand. She shares a crazy story about the time she got robbed then moved in with a Muay Thai fighter. She also talks about the complicated relationship she had with her mom including the fact that she slept with several of her friends. This episode includes a conversation about suicide, so please keep that in mind before you listen. If you or someone you know needs help, please call the National Suicide Prevention Lifeline at 1-800-273-8255.

Geth speaks with charming, identical twin geniuses about "twin hopping," fraternal twin frauds, and who would play them in a film. They get into twin shenanigans like convincing people that identical twins don't have belly buttons. Chris pitches ideas for a twin hosted podcast. They also discuss their jobs including working in national security and creating virtual reality textbook illustrations.

An ornithologist speaks with Geth about studying skuas and the time she almost punched a penguin. She opens up about how working in the field has affected her love life. She also describes the special bond that comes from living with a small group in a remote area and the joy of eating ice cream in Antarctica.

An autopsy technician explains the origins of his dark sense of humor and why he wants a career change. He also opens up to Geth about the importance of emotionally detaching during an autopsy, the hardest he's laughed a work, and how playing guitar helps him unwind. This episode includes graphic talk about autopsy work and mentions of sexual assault. So please keep that in mind before you listen and if you find these topics distressing, you might want to join us next episode instead.

A daughter opens up about losing her dad and going through a big career change at the same time. She shares the strange way she got her new job and how it felt to plan a funeral for someone she never really knew.

A woman opens up about being a closeted bisexual during her marriage. She shares with Geth how infertility issues and getting divorced led to coming out as polyamorous. She also discusses having Polycystic Ovary Syndrome and what it's like being in a throuple.

Where does one put their room key and vax card at a nude resort? Our caller reveals the answer to Geth live from San Francisco. He shares his theory on why older gay men are drawn to Palm Springs. Later on, he tells the bizarre story of temporarily losing his hearing and sense of balance. He also talks about losing his brother to addiction, making his friend go to rehab, and helps an audience member choose their next tattoo.

A man discusses the biggest challenges of hiking the trail and the scariest thing of all: Lyme disease. He describes legendary (and sometimes creepy) people known along the trail including the shirtless "hammer man" and the hospitality of "trail angels." He also shares a story with Geth about a stranger's kindness and how it gave him the strength to go on.

A young woman describes living life backwards after buying a home at 22 then moving in with roommates post-divorce with her baby. She also opens up to Geth about coming from a family of 8 and the fact that her son is only 1 year younger than her sister.

Years of PTSD nearly destroyed this former Green Beret's life, until he found a new path. He speaks with Geth about the Ayahuasca retreat that changed everything and how he became a shaman. He also shares how he's been helping other veterans cope with trauma and why psychedelics should be more easily accessible.

Geth speaks with a new dad who recently got surgery to help him burp. Will the live crowd in Omaha get to hear the caller belch? Only time will tell. He and Chris also talk about favorite sodas, like/dislike of plant-based meat, and the sudden urge to protect your kid once they're born.

A woman with cerebral palsy and a dark sense of humor tells the story of how her fiancé proposed. She discusses dating as a disabled person, "chair chasers", and why laughing is so important. She also bonds with Geth over a shared dislike of "Cotton Eyed Joe." Plus, more of Chris' favorite Valentine's Day stories submitted by B/A listeners.

In honor of Valentine's Day, we're releasing some funny, heartwarming, heartbreaking episodes about dating and romance. Either she gets married in 3 weeks or disappoints 160 Greek people. A woman opens up about having feelings for someone else and the fact that she has a baby with her fiancé. Plus, check out some of Geth's favorite Valentine's Day stories submitted by B/A listeners.

A graduate student getting her PhD in engineering talks about joining a sugar baby website to help pay for school. She speaks with Geth about how some of her clients just want companionship and what it was like living in "The Villages" for 6 months during the pandemic with her grandparents.

We're bringing you a special bonus release of Chris Gethard's new audiobook Dad On Pills! This book is about Geth's relationship with being a dad coupled with his relationship with being mentally ill, growing up in the '80s/'90s, and so much more. You can listen to it for free by signing up at try.scribd.com/gethard60.

Turning 21, leaving home, and a terrible secret. A young woman opens up to Geth about her mother's reaction to a traumatic event that caused a rift between them.

Sex or a "wee piece of toast?" A Brit opens up to Geth about being less horny during the pandemic and more into hobbies. She shares her love of bread and somehow it gets sexual. They also find commonality between the Rochester garbage plate and an English Breakfast.

She went from notarizing her now fiancé's divorce papers to falling in love. A woman shares with Geth the story of meeting her partner and getting past their 13 year age difference.

On the 300th episode of Beautiful/Anonymous, Chris stays on the line for 5 hours. The only rule? The caller decides when it's time to hang up. Geth speaks with a Gen Z guy about his complicated love triangle and catches up with a woman he met in an AOL chat room 20 years ago.

From having more sex to writing a musical to leaving an abusive marriage, this year's callers have some big goals for 2022. Geth also talks with someone who really doesn't like bananas and a woman calls in from her bubble bath.

Building an airstrip, fighting bears, and grieving in the wilderness of Alaska. A woman tells Geth about life in her home state and about hiking to the middle of nowhere in the freezing cold after her dad passed away.

Pregnant at 16, a whirlwind marriage, and exorcisms. A woman describes the disturbing practices her ex performed to "fix" someone's mental illness. She also opens up to Geth about what it was like getting divorced from a pastor.

A trans man opens up about having to use his dead name on legal documents and other complexities of adopting as a trans person. He also talks about his love of video games and what it's like being married to a Wiccan.

Robots and superheroes and spanking, oh my! A 'NiteFlirt' phone sex operator talks about her job and diverse group of clients. Later on, Geth gets a taste of her phone flirt style with a little role play.

A former carny talks about the time she taught a former president how to play Frog Bog. She also shares other crazy job stories with Geth including working for a tech company that had a giant porn closet.

A daughter tells Geth the story of a scam artist who manipulated her mother. She gets into the details of how this young man took advantage of many other divorced women.

Chris speaks with a licensed therapist about what it's like talking people through a crisis and how their jobs overlap. They also get into the strange joys of having kids and the weird things that they do learning boundaries.